


Dance Machines

by haikyuubaddiez



Series: Dance Machines [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Group chat, M/M, Miya Atsumu being a cockroach, No Plot/Plotless, Past Relationship(s), and hamilton, au but only kind of, but their school names are still the same, everyone is in love, hinata oikawa and kenma are childhood friends, like so in love, like there's so many Hamilton references for some reason, like they're in college, some of the relationship tags are past relationships, the chapter titles are so stupid, they talk about sex a lot lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2021-01-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:14:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 145
Words: 175,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25725706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haikyuubaddiez/pseuds/haikyuubaddiez
Summary: Don't mind the title, they literally don't dance in this at all.This is basically just a stupid, fun group chat AU where everyone is friends and in love :-)
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Azumane Asahi/Nishinoya Yuu, Haiba Lev/Yaku Morisuke, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Kageyama Tobio/Miya Atsumu, Kita Shinsuke/Miya Atsumu, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Kuroo Tetsurou/Sawamura Daichi, Miya Osamu/Suna Rintarou, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, Shimizu Kiyoko/Tanaka Ryuunosuke, Tendou Satori/Ushijima Wakatoshi, Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi, Yachi Hitoka/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Series: Dance Machines [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1937014
Comments: 662
Kudos: 900





	1. Big Brain Literally Geniuses

**Author's Note:**

> This is written by two different people, and it normally switches between the two authors every chapter, so if the writing style is a bit different, that's why :-). Enjoy!  
> (Btw the chapter names are named after what we normally just name the documents, so they're always just really random because we make them to make each other laugh lol)

**Shoyo Hinata** added:  **Asahi Azumane, Daichi Sawamura, Koshi Sugawara, Yuu Nishinoya, Tadashi Yamaguchi, Kei Tsukishima, and Ryu Tanaka** to a groupchat. 

**Ryu Tanaka** set the groupchat name to  _ Shitty Boys _ . 

**Daichi:** Hinata I said everyone.

**Hinata:** yeah, this is everyone

**Suga added: Tobio Kageyama to the chat.**

**Hinata:** :/

**Kageyama:** Why am I in this?

**Tsukishima** : They were literally talking about it in practice, idiot.

**Nishinoya:** it’s for volley-boys!!!! we should add more people!!

**Daichi:** No it’s supposed to just be for Karasuno.

**Hinata added: Tooru Oikawa and Kenma Kozume to the chat.**

**Sugawara:** You shouldn’t have even tried

**Hinata:** these are my best friends Oikawa and Kenma!! They play at different schools!!! 

**Oikawa:** ew, tobio.

**Kageyama:** literally what did i do.

**Kenma:** Oikawa don’t bully someone you haven’t met.

**Oikawa:** I’ve met tobio. Wish i hadn’t tho 😔

**Kageyama** : literally what did i do

**Tsukishima:** breathe?:)

**Oikawa added: Kuroo to the chat.**

**-**

**Groupchat:** **_Golden Trio Heart Eyes_ **

**Members: Kenma Kozume, Tooru Oikawa,** and  **Shoyo Hinata**

**Kenma:** o

**Kenma:** literally why did you do that to me

**Kenma:** all he’s going to do is flirt with me

**Kenma:** he’s going to embarrass me

**Kenma:** Oikawa you’re my enemy 

**Kenma:** forever and always

**Oikawa:** :(

-

_Shitty Boys_

**Oikawa** : This is Kuroo, he also plays volleyball.

**Kuroo:** Everyone say hi Kuroo

**Asahi:** hi kuroo

**Nishinoya:** hi kuroo 

**Yamaguchi:** hi kuroo

**Tsukishima:** hi kuroo

**Kageyama:** hi kuroo

**Hinata:** HI KUROO!!!

**Tanaka:** hi kuroo

**Tanaka:** where are Daichi and Suga

**Tanaka:** unprofessionalism at its finest.

**Tsukishima:** what does that even mean?

**Nishinoya:** it means unprofessionalism at its finest. 

**Oikawa:** Kenma’s been real quiet since Kuroo got here🤔

-

_Golden Trio Heart Eyes_

**Kenma:** oikawa don‘t think i won’t kill you.

-

_Shitty_ _Boys_

**Kuroo:** KENMA’S HERE? 

-

**Kenma** and  **Kuroo**

**Kuroo:** when he’s too embarrassed to say hi to me in the groupchat 😍

**Kenma:** Stopppp

**Kenma:** I hate group chats

**Kenma:** AND SO DO YOU???

**Kuroo:** I know, I’m probably gonna mute it soon lol.

**Kenma:** it’s been muted since the moment I was added;)

**Kuroo:** hmmm that’s a big brain you got there

**Kuroo:** Do u and ur big brain wanna get dinner together in an hour?:)

**Kenma:** pizza and video games?:)

**Kuroo** : sounds like a date!:)

-

_Shitty Boys_ :

**Daichi:** tanaka what did u say about suga 

**Tanaka: 😳**

**Sugawara:** literally go to sleep!! both of you!!!

**Nishinoya:** u guys sleep?

**Nishinoya:** it’s only 2am

**Asahi** : ONLY 2AM?

**Asahi:** i’m trying to sleep stop blowing up the chat

**Tsukishima:** you’re blowing up the chat by telling him to not blow up the chat

**Daichi:** literally GO TO SLEEP don’t think I won’t murder you guys in practice tomorrow

**Nishinoya** :  **😳**

-

**Daichi** and  **Suga**

**Daichi:** goodnight ❤️

**Sugawara: ❤️**

  
-

**Asahi** and  **Nishinoya**

**Nishinoya:** did the groupchat actually wake you up

**Asahi:** yes

**Nishinoya:** i’m sorry, i know you have issues falling asleep sometimes

**Nishinoya:** do you want me to call you?

**Nishinoya:** I know that helped last time. And like. I’m not saying hearing your voice until i fell asleep helped me fall asleep but

**Nishinoya:** maybe it would be benefiting both of us?

**Nishinoya:** ahhhhahaha maybe?

**_Nishinoya: incoming call from: Asahi <3_ **

\--

**Nishinoya** and  **Tanaka:**

**Nishinoya:** so in case you’re wondering, because i know it’s constantly on your mind

**Tanaka:** YOU’RE DATING ASAHI

**Nishinoya:** NO but i did fall asleep on the phone with him again last night

**Tanaka:** a dream this is literally a dream

**Tanaka:** now ask him out

**Nishinoya:** don’t be ridiculous

**Nishinoya:** btw where are you class is about to start

**Nishinoya:** i’m staring at your empty seat with tears in my beautiful eyes

**Tanaka:** lol

**Tanaka:** I'm going to the gas station, wanna come w ?

**Nishinoya:** of course i’m leaving now 😙✌🏼

-

****_Shitty Boys_

**Nishinoya:** lol guess who just got off the phone with their very angry parents 😼

**-**

**Kuroo** and  **Kenma:**

**Kuroo** : so idk why but i saw an emoji

**Kuroo:** not saying which one

**Kuroo:** and it reminded me of you for some reason but i need to text u to say i miss you literally the most right now 

**Kuroo:** i’m crying i’m shaking i miss my kenma

**Kenma:** i saw you two hours ago

**Kuroo:** still :(

**Kenma:** i’m so in love with you

**Kuroo:** zroom zroom i’m coming over so i can kiss your cute ass face

-

_Shitty Boys_

**Asahi:** why are your parents mad at you???

**Nishinoya:** they found out i’m failing one of my english classes :(

**Asahi:** maybe because you never go..

**Nishinoya:** literally who said i was talking to you asahi

**Nishinoya:** these messages aren’t directed for you

**Nishinoya:** someone else answer please

**Nishinoya:** i’m failing english :(

**Daichi:** maybe because you never go..

**Nishinoya:** i’m failing english :(

**Hinata:** it’s okay me too

**Oikawa:** HINATA?

**Kageyama:** me too

**Tanaka:** me too.

**Kenma:** i literally don’t want to be in this groupchat anymore

-

**Kuroo:** i’m so in love

**Kenma:** stop

**Kageyama:** what

**Oikawa:** me too

**Daichi:** me too

**Tsukishima:** what

**Hinata:** what

**Yamaguchi** : me too

**Kuroo:** what

**Kuroo:** with who

**Kuroo:** wait with who

**Nishinoya:** me too

**Kuroo:** what

**Kageyama:** me too

**Kuroo:** what’s going on

**Kuroo:** i didn’t mean to start this

**Kuroo:** but like lol do tell???

\--

**Kuroo** : so no one is gonna talk?

**Daichi** : srry they were at practice

**Kuroo:** for TWO DAYS?

**Daichi:** can’t talk gotta get back to practice

**Kuroo:** i hate it here

**Nishinoya** and  **Tanaka:**

**Nishinoya:** RYU RYU RYU!!!!! 

**Tanaka:** shut up SHUT UP SHUT UP DON’T TELL ME

**Tanaka:** YOU’RE DATING ASAHI   
**Nishinoya:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he do be KISSIN ME THO!!!!!!!!

**Tanaka:** this is THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE

  
  
  
  
  



	2. she do be existing tho

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: Wait wait wait, KaGAYama
> 
> Yamaguchi: Hilarious, I’m sure no one has ever said that to him before
> 
> Kageyama: KaBIyama*

_ Kuroo changed the group name to Kageyama PLEASE _

**Tanaka:** What?

**Hinata:** What? 

**Daichi:** What?

**Kenma:** Kuro please stop.

**Kuroo:** I need you

**Oikawa:** …

**Hinata:** What does that even mean?

**Kenma:** Kuro you’re being a freak. You’ll scare him

**Kuroo:** No no. I need you as a friend.

**Tsukishima:** Who needs that?

**Hinata:** Sounds gross

**Kuroo:** I just NEED his friendship

**Kuroo:** Why isn’t heRESPONDING KAGEYAMA

**Tsukishima:** He’s an idiot, give him some time

**Kuroo:** Wait wait wait, KaGAYama

**Yamaguchi:** Hilarious, I’m sure no one has ever said that to him before

**Kageyama:** KaBIyama*

**Kageyama:** I ruined the joke but just saying

**Kuroo:** PLESAE SCROLL UP

**Kenma:** Kageyama, please read what he wants so he can calm down

**Kenma:** I just want to take a nap

**Kageyama:** I thought we already were but sure. 

**Kageyama:** We can be friends :-)

**Oikawa:** Boooooo

**Yamaguchi:** Awww look at you Kageyama, making friends and stuff

**Hinata:** Wait

**Hinata:** Kageyama is bi?

**Daichi:** I thought we all knew that?

**Oikawa:** Why didn’t you tell me?? 

**Kageyama:** I didn’t think it mattered that much

**Oikawa:** But like

**Oikawa:** Why didn’t you tell

**Oikawa:** me?

**Kageyama:** I didn’t think you’d care?

**Tsukishima:** you're lowkey rude to him?

**Oikawa:** ARE YOU NOT?

**Kageyama:** That’s different

**Oikawa:** Do you not trust me?

**Kageyama:** You’re making this a way bigger deal than it needs to be

**Kageyama:** It wasn’t like I was having a crisis or like, I wasn’t hiding it. I just never brought it up to anyone really.

**Kageyama:** Unless it came up in conversation.

**Kageyama:** Now I feel bad.

**Kageyama:** Well, I guess since things are weird now. I’m bi

**Kuroo:** I’m Kenma-sexual😎

**Kenma:** Kuro stop

**Yamaguchi:** Does that mean you’re attracted to all people named Kenma?

**Kenma:** Better fucking not be

**Kuroo:** Never bbg 😻

**Oikawa:** Well, because I forced Tobio, I should say mine. I’m gay 🥴

**Kenma:** I don’t think of sexuality often so I’ll get back to you once I have a specific one I guess

**Oikawa:** Ask me who I’m gay for

**Daichi:** I guess we’re pretty similar there Kenma, I just sorta, like people I guess? If I do, great. If I don’t, that’s fine.

**Suga:** Aw, it’s like a little coming out party.

**Suga:** I’m gay

**Oikawa:** Great. Now ask me who I’m gay for

**Nishinoya:** I heard coming out party 👀 

**Nishinoya:** Omg kageyama we’re bi buddies

**Nishinoya:** 😈😈😈

**Tsukishima:** I guess I’m a part of the bi buddies too then…

**Yamaguchi:** PAN

**Tanaka:** Guess I’m the only straight one on the team 

**Hinata:** Did you forget about me?

**Tanaka:** Guess I’m the only straight one on the team.

**Hinata:** I

**Hinata:** Am

**Hinata:** Straight

**Hinata:** ... 

**Oikawa:** Someone please

**Oikawa:** Ask who I’m gay for

**Sugawara:** OH MY GOD

**Sugawara:** Wow Oikawa, who are you gay for?

_ Oikawa added Iwaizumi to the group _

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan

**Iwaizumi:** You’re a freak

_ Iwaizumi left the group _

_ Oikawa added Iwaizumi to the group _

**Oikawa: 😞**

**Iwaizumi:** I literally only have 3 numbers saved. Why am I here?

**Oikawa:** Because no one here appreciates me

**Iwaizumi:** You don’t deserve it

**Kageyama:** Hi Iwaizumi!

**Iwaizumi:** Hi Kageyama. How’re you doing?

**Kageyama:** Pretty good. You?

**Iwaizumi:** I’m alright.

**Kenma:** Who is Iwaizumi?

**Oikawa:** The most handsome wing spiker

**Sugawara:** That’s Daichi

**Nishinoya:** Ryu? 😍😍

**Tanaka:** Stop it you 😚

**Oikawa:** Then the most handsome ace

**Nishinoya:** Asahi 🥰

**Oikawa:** I HATE YOU ALL HE’S THE MOST HANDSOME WING SPIKER ACE FROM AOBA JOHSAI DAMN 

**Nishinoya:** Jeez, no need to yell

**Kuroo:** The one with the biceps?

**Oikawa:** YES OMG THAT’S HIM

**Oikawa:** wAIT

**Iwaizumi:** This is embarrassing. I already hate this

  
  


  
  
  



	3. Ugly But Not

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: oh my god oh my godo oh my gofd
> 
> Hinata: sTOP I GET IT
> 
> Oikawa: O H MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD
> 
> Hinata: STOP YOU’RE THE WORST I SHOULD’VE TOLD KENMA

_ Golden Trio Heart eyes _

**Oikawa:** oh my god so guess what

**Oikawa:** iwaizumi asked me out

**Hinata:** omg 

**Hinata:** wait

**Hinata:** did you say yes

**Oikawa:** yes???

**Oikawa:** i love him i love him!!??

**Hinata:** isn’t he mean to u???

**Hinata:** ur a freak i’d never like someone who’s mean to me

**Oikawa:** don’t u like tobio? he’s mean to u isn’t he?

**Hinata:** ew ew ew i’d never like him like that

**Hinata:** i’m literally straight 

**Oikawa:** lololol i mean like ur his friend

**Kenma:** embarrassing literally embarrassing this conversation is literally embarrassing me

**Kenma:** but ANYWAY a boyfriend????

**Kenma** : i’d like to say i’m not shocked but i am

**Oikawa:** WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

\--

**Hinata** and **Oikawa:**

**Hinata:** okay so like i need to tell you something

**Oikawa:** okay?

**Hinata:** and like you’re the only person i’m telling

**Hinata:** and please don’t laugh at me

**Oikawa:** okay??

**Hinata:** ok so like 

**Hinata:** you know how you made that comment about me liking kageyama and i got defensive because i was like ew no never

**Hinata:** well

**Hinata:** i went to sleep and i had a dream right

**Hinata:** and like

**Hinata:** IT WAS SO CUTE LIKE I WAS JUST IN THE GYM PLAYING VOLLEYBALL AND THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT SETTERS AND I WAS LIKE WHERE’S KAGEYAMA BECAUSE HE WASN’T THERE AND THEN AFTER PRACTICE I LEFT THE GYM AND HE WAS THERE WITH FLOWERS AND HE ASKED ME OUT IN FRONT OF EVERYONE WHICH WAS KIND OF EMBARRASSING BUT IT

**Hinata:** MY STOMACH HAD SO MANY BUTTERFLIES???????????????

**Hinata:** OVER KAGEYAMA WHAT WHAT WHAT

**Hinata:** AND THEN HE CAME UP TO ME AND KISSED ME AND IT WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER AND EVERYONE ELSE LIKE DISAPPEARED AND THEN WE WERE JUST PLAYING VOLLEYBALL EXCEPT I KEPT KISSING HIM AND HE LOOKED SO BEAUTIFUL AND BLUSHED SO MUCH BUT ALSO HE WAS STILL BEING MEAN TO ME BUT LIKE IT HIT DIFFERENT

**Hinata:** and then i woke up and now i don’t know what i’m feeling

**Oikawa:** oh my god

**Oikawa:** oh my god oh my godo oh my gofd

**Hinata:** sTOP I GET IT

**Oikawa:** O H MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

**Hinata:** STOP YOU’RE THE WORST I SHOULD’VE TOLD KENMA

-

_ Shitty Boys _

**Hinata** changed the group name to  _ Oikawa is the ugliest _

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** what did i DO 

**Iwaizumi:** idk but i’m sure you deserve it

**Oikawa:** get out of my house

**Daichi:** he’s at ur house? At this hour? Hmmm

**Nishinoya:** hmmmmmmmmmm????

**Oikawa:** yes he’s my man keep scrolling 

_ Iwaizumi has left the chat _

**Kageyama:** must have struck a nerve w that one

**Oikawa:** tobio i hate u more and more every day

_ Oikawa added Iwaizumi to the chat _

**Oikawa:** welcome back baby 🥰

_ Iwaizumi has left the chat _

**-**

_ Oikawa is the ugliest  _

**Asahi:** i can’t stop sneezinfg what does this mean

**Daichi:** what

**Sugawara:** what

**Hinata:** what

**Yamaguchi:** what

**Asahi:** sorry wrong chat

**Asahi** and  **Nishinoya:**

**Asahi:** i can’t stop sneezing what does this mean

**Nishinoya:** amazing. I’m so in love with you

**Asahi:** if ur so in love with me why am i sleeping alone rn

**Nishinoya:** omw !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🏃🏻‍♂️🏃🏻‍♂️🏃🏻‍♂️🏃🏻‍♂️

-

_ Oikawa is the ugliest  _

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ Hinata is embarrassing _

**Hinata:** you’re the worst person i’ve ever met

**Daichi:** what did he do this time

**Oikawa:** i’d love to tell u all

**Oikawa:** esp one person in particular 

**Kenma:** don’t bully him like this

**Kageyama:** what does any of this mean?

**Oikawa:** i’D LOVE TO TELL YOU

**Hinata** has left the chat

**Sugawara:** don’t bully my son like this

**Oikawa:** YOUR son???

**Oikawa** : i birthed him

**Oikawa:** he and kenma came from This womb

**Kenma** has left the chat

**Iwaizumi:** why can’t you act like a normal fucking person for two seconds Oikawa

**Daichi** : Oikawa i’m gonna kill you

**Oikawa:** ME????

**Sugawara** added  **Hinata and Kenma**

**Kuroo:** KENMA’S BACK 🥰

**Kuroo:** i missed u so much

**Kenma:** stop

**Hinata:** damn did anyone miss me?🥺

**Kageyama:** you weren’t gone for very long

**Kageyama:** i think kuroo is just clingy

**Sugawara:** i missed u hinata

**Hinata:** at least someone appriciates me

**Tsukishima:** hinata why would we miss someone who can’t even spell

**Yamaguchi:** LMAO

**-**

_ Hinata is embarrassing: _

**Kenma:** guess WHO JUST GOT ANIMAL CROSSING???

**Kenma:** not ME !!!!! BECAUSE I’M BROKEN

**Kageyama:** broken???

**Oikawa:** kenma what does this mean??   
  


**Kenma** and  **Kuroo:**

**Kenma:** kuroo i’m so embarrassed

**Kenma:** THAT GROUPCHAT MESSAGE WAS SUPPOSED TO GO TO YOU

**Kuroo:** FUCKING IDIOT AHAHAHA

-

_ Hinata is embarrassing: _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** guess who just got animal crossing

**Nishinoya:** this is the cutest thing i’ve ever seen in my life

**Hinata:** oh so kenma is in LOVE love

**Oikawa:** iwaizumi that could be us

**Iwaizumi:** idiot u don’t even like video games

**Kageyama:** awww

**Yamaguchi:** god i wish that were me

**Sugawara:** kenma said make his pockets hurt and i respect that

**Kenma:** STOP

-

_ Hinata is embarrassing: _

**Oikawa:** guys i’m literally the best bf ever 

**Daichi:** incorrect suga is better 

**Nishinoya:** y’all dating? Lol

**Sugawara:** good job idiot 

**Yamaguchi:** omgomgomg

**Kuroo:** guys stop blowing up the chat ur gonna wake kenma

**Oikawa:** ANYWAYS

**Oikawa:** i’m making Iwaizumi pancakes for breakfast bc he’s still asleep! 

**Oikawa:** best boyfriend best boyfriend best boyfriend

**Kageyama:** you sound like ur trying to convince yourself

**Oikawa:** tobio stay out of this 

**Asahi:** what if the groupchat notifs wake him up and he sees this

**Oikawa:** impossible bc iwaizumi is smart and turns off his notifications when he’s sleeping

**Hinata:** ur cooking??? Oh no

**Kageyama:** hi hinata

**Hinata:** hi???

**Kageyama:** what is with the question marks i’m literally being nice to you

**Hinata:** you literally just said hi

**Kageyama:** yeah i didn’t say hi to anyone else

**Oikawa:** please just let me have one moment

**Nishinoya:** oikawa i didn’t know u could cook

**Oikawa:** you don’t know me irl….

**Nishinoya:** yeah but it’s just a vibe

**Nishinoya:** like i’ve never met kuroo but i know he can’t cook

**Kuroo:** ur so correct with that

**Kuroo:** i tried once and set off the fire alarm lololol

**Oikawa:** rip to u but i’m different ❤️

**Daichi:** lmaoooo who wants to bet the pancakes are gonna suck

**Hinata:** oh trust me they will

**Sugawara:** probably

**Oikawa:** thanks for being so supportive guys

-

_ Hinata is embarrassing: _

**Iwaizumi** :  _ attached video _

**Nishinoya:** LMAOOOO

**Tanaka:** what is that? Those are not pancakes. Those are clumps

**Tanaka:** oikawa how did you fuck those up that badly

**Kuroo:** ok but like why are y’all not talking about what he’s saying

**Kuroo:** ‘i tried to make a smiley face in syrup but it didn’t work’

**Kuroo** : Oikawa you’re dumb

**Daichi:** best boyfriend ? 🤨

**Iwaizumi:** stoppppp omg

**Iwaizumi:** he tried his best he’s never cooked pancakes from scratch before

**Iwaizumi:** he’s cute look at how bashful he is

**Hinata:** omg i never thought i’d see the day

**Hinata:** iwaizumi… ur being nice to him

**Iwaizumi:** he woke me up to ugly pancakes in bed and he tried his best it’s cute

**Iwaizumi:** i love him omg

**Oikawa:** omg omg omgo mg

**Oikawa:** babe 🥰😇

**Iwaizumi:** nevermind ur an idiot

**Sugawara:** LMAO

  
  



	4. Tall Boys Own Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima: It’ll be funny. People will be dramatic  
> Tsukishima: Do it for the drama

_ Kageyama PLEASE _

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Asahi:** Is that Kageyama?

**Nishinoya:** WITH NATSU??????

**Oikawa:** I hate to say it but that’s cute

**Kuroo:** I want to marry that man

**Kenma:** Wut

**Kuroo:** Look at him. He knows how to do makeup like what 

**Kuroo:** What can’t he do?

**Kuroo:** He’s so

**Kuroo:** so

**Tanaka:** Heart eyes?

**Kuroo:** Yes

**Hinata:** Kageyama has a big sister sooo

**Kuroo:** Um okay and?

**Hinata:** It makes sense that he knows what he’s doing

**Tanaka:** I have an older sister and I don’t know how to do make up

**Kuroo:** SEE

**Kuroo:** THAT IS TALENT.

_ Kenma changed the group name to Kuroo has a crush on Kageyama _

**Hinata:** No

_ Hinata changed the group name to No one has a crush on the idiot _

_ Kenma changed the group name to Hinata is upset for some reason _

**Hinata:** This groupchat was supposed to be fun

**Kuroo:** We must protect my main squeeze

**Kuroo:** My main squeeze after Kenma of course 

_ - _

_**Daichi** and **S** **ugawara:** _

**Daichi:** are you busy?

**Sugawara:** nope, what’s poppin?

**Daichi:** ew

**Daichi:** anyways

**Daichi:** have you eaten today?

**Sugawara:** nope teehee

**Daichi:** Suuuuuugaaaaa

**Sugawara:** Daichi I’m doing homework

**Sugawara:** stop rolling your eyes I can feel you rolling your eyes

**Daichi:** I’m on my way over. Let’s get lunch or something 

**Sugawara:** Guess I have to go make myself look good for my lovely Daichi

**Daichi:** Shouldn’t be that hard because you’re always cute.

**Sugawara:** You’re being cheesy stop

**Daichi:** I’m being honest

**Sugawara:** Nevermind. I don’t want to see you. Go home

**Daichi:** Shut up I’m already here

**Daichi:** Cutie

**Sugawara:** I’ll be down soon😚

-

_ Hinata is upset for some reason _

**Nishinoya:** Imagine being sweet, handsome, AND tall

**Kuroo:** I don’t have to imagine that

**Oikawa:** Me neither

**Iwaizumi:** You’re shitty and not cute at all so idk what you’re talking about.

**Oikawa:** Why do you hate me when all I do is love you

**Nishinoya:** Anyways, I’m talking about my tall, sweet and handsome Asahi!

**Nishinoya:** tall boys tall boys tall boys tall boys tall boys tall boys 

**Yamaguchi:** Tall boys tall boys tall boys tall boys tall boys tall boys

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi why

_ Yamaguchi changed the group name to Tall boys own me _

**Nishinoya:** Correct

**Kuroo:** Kenma please participate to make me feel good about myself

**Kenma:** Tall boys tall boys

**Kuroo:** Maybe he does love me afterall

**Oikawa:** Please Iwa-chan

**Oikawa:** Pretty pleaseee 

**Oikawa:** I REFUSE to let tetsuro have a better love life than me

**Iwaizumi:** Tall boys but the tall boy is Kageyama 

**Oikawa:** I want him gone

**Oikawa:** I want Tobio GONE

**Kuroo:** Tall boys like Kageyama 

**Nishinoya:** Anyone else concerned about his love for Kageyama?

**Kenma:** He has a volleyball crush on him

**Kuroo:** Don’t embarrass me

**Kenma:** You literally do it to yourself but go off

**Kuroo:** …

**Kuroo:** OMGOMG HEAR ME OUT

**Kuroo:** Short cute boys like my adorable Kenma

**Kuroo:** Short boys short boys short boys short boys short boys short boys

**Kenma:** Kuroo stop I’ll end you

**Kuroo:** SHort boys short boys

**-**

**Tsukishima** and  **Kageyama:**

**Tsukishima:** this is your moment Tobio

**Kageyama:** I’m scared

**Tsukishima:** Of who

**Kageyama:** Everyone everyone everyone

**Tsukishima:** Shut up shut up shut up

**Tsukishima:** Just please

**Tsukishima:** It’ll be funny. People will be dramatic

**Tsukishima:** Do it for the drama

-

_ Tall boys own me _

**Tsukishima:** Short boys short boys

**Tanaka:** Short boys like Noya

**Kageyama:** Short boys short boys short boys

**Asahi:** Short boys short boys short boys short boys

**Nishinoya:** I need to hug you

**Oikawa:** Short boys short boys short boys short boys

**Iwaizumi:** You aren’t even that much taller than me

**Oikawa:** Say that to me when you’re six feet or taller

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t talk to me ever again

**Kuroo:** KAGEYAMA WAHT

**Nishinoya:** KAGEYAMA I’M OLDER THAN YOU SO YOU HAVE TO TELL ME WHO

**Asahi:** I’m actually very curious

**Kuroo:** um as your friend, you legally have to tell me who

**Kuroo:** PLEASE KAGEYAMA I NEED TO KNOW WHAT SHORT BITCH I HAVE TO BEAT UP BECAUSE THEY’RE REPLACING ME

**Tsukishima:** dramatic

**Kageyama:** very dramatic

**Kageyama:** Kuroo please

**Kenma:** kuro please


	5. Snugglin'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima: Shut up  
> Yamaguchi: you’re making me blush Tsukki 

_ Tall boys own me _

**Oikawa:** Good morning uglies. Just your daily reminder that you aren’t as cute as me.

**Kenma:** You can leave.

**Sugawara:** No one is stopping you.

**Hinata:** 😡

**Oikawa:** Where’s Tobio?

**Hinata:** Literally why

**Oikawa:** He needs to acknowledge my superiority 

**Iwaizumi:** Stop that

**Hinata:** I don’t think Kageyama tries to be cute. He doesn’t need to really

**Oikawa:** So you think he’s cute?

**Hinata:** NO THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT OIKAWA LEAVE

**Hinata:** I meant like. It’s not him? To be cute? Because he’s good at other things like?? Why would he need that?

**Oikawa:** So you think Tobio is so great that it makes him naturally attractive

**Hinata:** Yes

**Hinata:** WAIT NO 

**Hinata:** LEAVE

**Daichi:** Why am I just seeing this now and why does Oikawa think he’s cuter than Suga

**Tanaka:** Wow goals

**Yamaguchi:** Goals 😍

**Yamaguchi:** Imagine a guy complimenting you

**Yamaguchi:** What a dream

**Tsukishima:** Shut up

**Yamaguchi:** you’re making me blush Tsukki 

**Tsukishima:** why isn’t anyone interrogating hinata?

**Kuroo:** I was going to because I just caught up with the chat.

**Kuroo:** what does that mean hinata?

**Kenma:** kuro please come open the door

**Kenma:** I’m so sleepy (￣^￣)

**Kuroo:** coming!

**Kuroo:** also that face looks like you wut

**Hinata:** if you're sleepy, why are you at his place?

**Kenma:** Because I take naps here and because I can

**Kenma:** don’t change the subject shouyou.

**Hinata:** IM NOT

**Oikawa:** YOU ARE

**Kuroo:** okay, me and kenma are situated now.

**Kuroo:** so, short stuff, can I call you that?

**Hinata:** no

**Kuroo:** short stuff, is it true that you think Kageyama is good at volleyball amongst other things?

**Hinata:** someone help me

**Kuroo:** it’s a simple yes or no question

**Tsukishima:** answer the question idiot

**Hinata:** Kageyama is good at volleyball 

**Kuroo:** Interesting interesting… 

**Kuroo:** But do you think he’s attractive when he plays?

**Hinata:** I ahsfywbc

**Hinata:** I’m scared

**Oikawa:** ANSWER

**Hinata:** I THINK KAGEYAMA IS COOL WHEN HE PLAYS

**Kenma:** Boring

**Kuroo:** hmm I guess we’ll save the questions for another day. When he wants to cooperate.

**Hinata:** I LITERALLY ANSWERED YOUR QUESTIONS WHTA

**Kenma:** Yawn yawn yawn yawn hinata is boring sooo boring yawn.

**Kuroo:** So boring I might just take a nap with kenma

**Kenma:** Stay away from me

**Kuroo:** You’re at my house

**Kuroo:** You’re in MY room

**Kenma:** I said what i said

**Kuroo: 💔💔💔💔**

**Oikawa:** Me and Iwa-chan snuggle all the time

**Iwaizumi:** Okay 2 things

**Iwaizumi:** 1\. You cling to whatever's next to you when you’re tired

**Iwaizumi:** 2\. Don’t use the word snuggle. It makes me uncomfortable say cuddle you freak

**Oikawa:** He didn’t deny it 🥰

**Nishinoya:** SNUGGLE AHAHAHAHFDCHVW

**Nishinoya:** Asahi come snuggle

**Sugawara:** Daichi come snuggle

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki come snuggle

**Kuroo:** Kenma please let me come snuggle

**Kenma:** The bedroom door is unlocked idiot

**Kenma:** Come snuggle

**Oikawa:** … 

**Oikawa:** Everyone here hates me.

_ Sugawara changed the group name to Snuggle  _ 😍

**Oikawa:** You Koushi

**Oikawa:** I used to think you were cute and refreshing

**Oikawa:** Refreshing my ass

**Sugawara:** Still cute tho

**Oikawa:** I want to rid the world of Karasuno setters

**Sugawara:** I’m gonna disappear from the chat for a bit. Me and Daichi are snuggling

**Oikawa:** I don’t want to talk to anyone here

_ Oikawa left the group _

_ Iwaizumi added Oikawa to the group _

**Iwaizumi:** You put me in this so we stay here together.

**-**

**_Tsukishima_ ** _ and  _ **Kageyama:**

**Kageyama:** Tsukishima

**Kageyama:** Tsukishima the group chat what

**Tsukishima:** idiot, why didn’t you say anything 

**Kageyama:** I panicked!

**Kageyama:** is it too late to say something?

**Tsukishima:** it depends.

**Tsukishima:** they know your dumb so it might be fine

**Kageyama:** stop calling me dumb, you’re the worst

**Tsukishima:** shut up and get in there

-

_ Snuggle  _ 😍

**Kageyama:** hinata

**Kageyama:** thanks

**Tanaka:** IS KAGEYAMA SHY

**Kuroo:** CUTE

**Tsukishima:** HA

**Sugawara:** DAICHI OUR SON LOOK AT HIM

**Hinata:** You scare me

**Kageyama:** IDIOT I WAS TRYING TO BE NICE

**Kageyama:** I TAKE IT BACK

**Hinata:** NO DON’T

**Kageyama:** Too late

**Nishinoya:** SHOUYOU HAAHAH


	6. Oikawa is a bottom. Anyone who disagrees is wrong. Literally show me proof that he DOESN'T BOTTOM IWAIZUMI. YOU CAN'T BECAUSE HE'S A BOTTOM AND I WILL STAND BY THAT STATEMENT FOREVER

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama: What an ugly emoji  
> Oikawa: TOBIO GET OVER MY EMOJI CHOICE AND LOOK AT THE BIG PICTURE

**Kuroo** _ changed the group name to Make Kenma Happy  _

**Yamaguchi:** Is Kenma okay?

**Kageyama:** ???

**Kuroo:** He’s fine, I just want him to always be happy.

**Kenma:** How sweet

**Kenma:** However, I’m embarrassed so please stop talking to me now

**Kuroo:** Bbg I just never want you to be sad 😙

**Kenma:** Thanks idiot 😘

**Oikawa:** Ur relationship is so strange

**Oikawa:** Like idk if that’s cute or comical

**Kuroo:** Both bitch 😼

**Kenma:** We have that kind of power 

**Kuroo:** That’s two kinds of power. They don’t call me double trouble for nothing

**Tsukishima:** Shut up no one calls you that

**Yamaguchi:** LITERALLY WHO CALLS YOU THAT KUROO

**Iwaizumi:** I think they’re cute

**Kenma:** Thanks

**Kuroo:** That means a lot Mr. Biceps. Thank you

**Iwaizumi:** Please just call me Iwaizumi

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan

**Iwaizumi:** Stop no. One person calling me Iwa-chan is more than enough.

**Oikawa:** My personal nickname. How romantic

**Iwaizumi:** You’re dead to me

**Kageyama:** lol

**Oikawa:** (T ^ T)

**Iwaizumi:** Are you coming over or what?

**Oikawa:** I am! I’ll be there soon ( ๑ >◡< ๑ )

**Hinata:** weird

**Hinata:** I can’t tell if Iwaizumi is mean to him or not??

**Kageyama:** It’s not mean

**Hinata:** Wut

**Kageyama:** It’s just playful

**Hinata:** But like, if they’re dating??? Idk I’m just ???

**Kageyama:** Iwaizumi and Oikawa are best friends but they just like each other. So they’re still gonna act the same.

**Hinata:** Hm

**Kageyama:** It’s not like Iwaizumi is doing anything bad or being actually mean

**Kageyama:** If that makes sense

**Hinata:** I guess, yeah.

**Oikawa:** We’re still best friends we just love each other in a romantic way too I guess 🤗

**Kageyama:** Weird ass emoji

**Kageyama:** But exactly.

**Oikawa:** Unneeded comment, much like everything you say

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa

**Oikawa:** Anyways. Shouyou

**Oikawa:** For example.

**Oikawa:** If you and Tobio were dating

**Kenma:** Great example

**Tsukishima:** Wow

**Oikawa:** Wouldn’t it be weird if he treated you completely differently? Like if he stopped calling you idiot or dumbass. Or like if you stopped doing normal things together because you’re dating?

**Hinata:** WHAT THE HELL

**Hinata:** HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW

**Tsukishima:** Can you calm down?

**Oikawa:** It’s all supposed to be playful. It’s a relationship after all 

**Oikawa:** In this example that is.

**Oikawa:** The example where you and Tobio are dating

**Hinata:** OIKAWA

**Oikawa:** Just something to think about… 

**Oikawa:** Anyways! I’m at Iwa-chan’s so I’ll talk to you all later!

**Hinata:** That makes sense I guess.

**Hinata:** THAT MAKES A LOT OF SENSE ACTUALLY

**Tsukishima:** Glad you figured it out. Go scream about it somewhere else please.

**Hinata:** wow… 

**-**

_ Make Kenma Happy _

**Oikawa:** YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE

**Tanaka:** Your eyes

**Oikawa:** NO

**Oikawa:** YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE

**Nishinoya:** your eyes

**Oikawa:** NO STOP

**Oikawa:** YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE

**Sugawara:** Your eyes

**Oikawa:** I HATE KARASUNO I HATE KARASUNO

**Sugawara:** Sorry, I had to. What’s up?

**Oikawa:** I WAS OUT WITH MATTSUN

**Oikawa:** AND YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE

**Oikawa:** WHAT HE TOLD ME

**Iwaizumi:** What is it this time?

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan, he told me I have bottom energy  (´༎ຶོρ༎ຶོ`)

**Oikawa:** BOTTOM ENERGY

**Kageyama:** What an ugly emoji

**Oikawa:** TOBIO GET OVER MY EMOJI CHOICE AND LOOK AT THE BIG PICTURE

**Sugawara:** LMAOOOO OIKAWA

**Iwaizumi:** ???

**Nishinoya:** Are you surprised?

**Sugawara:** WHERE IS DAICHI HE NEEDS TO SEE THIS

**Yamaguchi:** EVEN TSUKKI IS LAUGHING HA

**Oikawa:** Why is everyone LAUGHING AT ME!?

**Kageyama:** Wait, Oikawa isn’t a bottom?

**Iwaizumi:** KAGEYAMA LMAO

**Tsukishima:** You’re incredible Kageyama

**Oikawa:** Do you do this on purpose Tobio?

**Oikawa:** Underclassmen are supposed to be cute. Tobio isn’t cute at all!

**Oikawa:** Anyways, I think he’s wrong

**Nishinoya:** He literally isn’t

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** You ARE a bottom, idiot

**Oikawa:** I am not! I radiate switch energy at least!

**Sugawara:** You wish!

**Sugawara:** And that’s coming from a bottom sooo

**Daichi:** Suga…

**Nishinoya:** Nice Daichi!

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa, dumbass stop trying to be something you’re not.

**Oikawa:** But I’m not

**Iwaizumi:** Keep telling yourself that

**Oikawa:** You all suck! Especially you Iwa-chan! I thought you loved me

**Iwaizumi:** Maybe a power bottom

**Iwaizumi:** But that’s still a bottom

**Hinata** : Ooh! What’s that? Am I a bottom?

**Hinata:** Power bottom sounds kinda cool!

**Daichi:** Hinata no

**Sugawara:** Hinata, sweetheart, sit this one out

**Hinata:** I wanna know what it is!

**Tsukishima:** You don’t need to know

**Hinata:** But everyone knows!

**Hinata:** Even Kageyama knows!

**Daichi:** Iwaizumi and Oikawa.

**Daichi:** This one is on you. You are his parents

**Oikawa:** Shouyou, if you don’t know now then it’s not important at the moment.

**Hinata:** Then why does Kageyama know!

**Kageyama:** because

**Hinata:** STUPID KAGEYAMA TELL ME

**Kageyama:** No.

_**Hinata** and **Kageyama:** _

**Hinata:** Please Kageyama

**Kageyama:** Dumbass, no

**Hinata:** Pretty pretty please!!

**Kageyama:** Ask someone else

**Kageyama:** Please

_**Hinata** and **Yamaguchi:** _

**Hinata:** Yamaguchi please tell me

**Hinata:** Am I a bottom?

**Hinata:** What is a bottom?

**Yamaguchi:** Hinata, don’t ask me…

**Yamaguchi:** Google it

**Hinata:** Just tell me.

**Yamaguchi:** Hinata

_ Make Kenma Happy _

**Yamaguchi:** Someone please tell him

**Hinata:** PLEASE ANYONE PLEASE

**Kenma:** Why are you doing this to me Shouyou

**Kenma:** So when it comes to sex, basically there are three types of roles. Tops, bottoms, and switches.

**Kenma:** This is just the basics Shouyou

**Hinata:** I’m listening

**Kenma:** So tops are typically more dominant. Hence why they’re called tops. They are on top. Idk how else to say that. I guess, they’re the “givers” during sex

**Kenma:** Bottoms are the opposite. They’re typically submissive and they’re the “receivers”. I really don’t know how to explain this without sounding weird like. It feels like I’m telling him wrong information for no reason Kuro I’m scared and uncomfy

**Kuroo:** You’re doing great Kenma ❤️ Keep fighting!

**Kenma:** And then there are switches. That’s a person who can play either role.

**Kuroo:** My boy is a genius heart eyes

**Kenma:** Does that make sense?

**Hinata:** Yeah

**Hinata:** So how do you know what you are?

**Kenma:** Shouyou this feels so awkward but okay

**Kenma:** It just happens I guess. Well I mean, it just happened for me. But then again, look who I’m dealing with

**Kuroo:** 😎

**Hinata:** Okay I get it!

**Hinata:** When he’s next to Iwaizumi, Oikawa does seem like a bottom.

**Kuroo:** I CAN’T BE HERE AHAHAH OIKAWA THIS IS YOUR KID

**Oikawa:** OH SUDDENLY YOU’RE A GENIUS WHEN IT COMES TO THIS STUFF HINATA I WILL END YOU


	7. body euphoria heart eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata: kageyama come hang out with me
> 
> Daichi: what
> 
> Daichi: say this in a private chat you weirdo

**Kuroo** and  **Kenma:**

**Kenma:** i feel so horrible today :(

**Kenma:** Like I feel so sad and ugly

**Kenma:** gonna listen to my kuro playlist so i can feel better 

-

**Kuroo:** umm i just woke up

**Kuroo:** i’m gonna come over after i take a shower

**Kuroo:** i’ll spend the whole day cuddling ur beautiful ass

**Kenma:** i love you

  
  


-

_ Hinata is annoying _

**Kuroo** changed the groupchat name to  _ kenam is the cutes thting i’v ecveer seen in my lfe i am literally going ot marry him and i swear to go d if anyone ever says that he isn’t the cutest i won’t hesitate to smite them on the spot i swear to god he’s so cute _

**Kageyama:** oh wow

**Tsukishima:** i thought u wanted to marry kageyama

**Kuroo:** i’ve changed my mind

**Oikawa:** good

**Hinata:** good

**Kageyama:** what 

**Kenma:** kuro why are you being embarrassing rn

**Kuroo:** i just remembered tht u have a kuroo playlist??

**Kuroo:** and it’s love songs that make you think of me

**Kenma:** ew stop

**Hinata:** i have a playlist like that

**Hinata:** kenma and i made ours together

**Kuroo:** u have a kuroo playlist too?🤔

**Kenma:** why are you so annoying

**Oikawa:** shouyou who’s your playlist for

**Kageyama:** why do you have a playlist for someone hinata

**Kageyama:** idiot

**Kageyama:** who’s it for

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Sugawara:** LMAO

**Hinata:** anyway i think about the fact that they killed the mom in mamma mia 2 every single day

**Hinata:** like why did they do that to her

**Hinata:** i cried watching it for the first time??

**Hinata:** anyone else relate haha???

**Kageyama:** i think about that a lot too

**Kenma:** i haven’t seen those movies

**Hinata:** liar. u told me the other day u watched them with kuroo???

**Kuroo:** lol

**Kuroo:** we didn’t watch the movies

**Kenma** has removed  **Kuroo** from the groupchat

**Nishinoya:** wait no

**Nishinoya** has added  **Kuroo** to the groupchat

**Nishinoya:** let the man speak

**Oikawa:** mamma mia sucks

**Iwaizumi:** you watch it all the time

**Sugawara:** mamma mia is  **😍**

**Tsukishima:** why did hinata change the topic 

**Tsukishima:** and why did all of you let him

**Yamaguchi:** simple minds 😌

**Oikawa:** wait wait wait 

**Oikawa:** HINATA

**Hinata** has left the groupchat

**Oikawa:** kenma stop hanging out with shouyou 

**Kenma:** what

**Oikawa:** ur influencing him to be like this

**Sugawara:** LMAO

**Kageyama** has added  **Hinata** to the groupchat

**Kageyama:** hinata

**Hinata:** kageyama

**Kageyama:** hinata

**Hinata:** kageyama

**Kageyama:** hinata

**Hinata:** kageyama

**Kuroo:** what’s happening

**Kageyama:** hinata

**Hinata:** kageyama

**Daichi:** stop

**Oikawa:** what’s going on

**Hinata:** lol i won

**Kageyama:** idiot

-

_ kenam is the cutes thting i’v ecveer seen in my lfe i am literally going ot marry him and i swear to go d if anyone ever says that he isn’t the cutest i won’t hesitate to smite them on the spot i swear to god he’s so cute _

**Nishinoya** changed his name to  **Asahi FUCKS**

**Asahi:** what is wrong with you

**Kuroo** changed his name to  **Kuroo FUCKS**

**Daichi:** both of you stop wtf

**Oikawa** changed his name to  **Oikawa FUCKS**

**Iwaizumi:** lmao

**Sugawara:** we’ve been over this

**Sugawara** changed  **Daichi’s** name to  **Daddy**

**Daddy:** why did you do that

**Asahi FUCKS:** damn suga 

**Asahi FUCKS:** i should’ve done that

**Sugawara:** you snooze you lose 😌

**Asahi FUCKS:** you reap what you sow i guess

**Kenma** has left the chat

**Asahi** has left the chat

**Kageyama** has left the chat

**Daddy** has left the chat

**Tsukishima** has left the chat

**Yamaguchi** has left the chat

**Asahi FUCKS:** natural selection

**Sugawara:** truly

_ kenam is the cutes thting i’v ecveer seen in my lfe i am literally going ot marry him and i swear to go d if anyone ever says that he isn’t the cutest i won’t hesitate to smite them on the spot i swear to god he’s so cute _

**Tanaka:** hinata has a hickey

**Daichi:** WHAT

**Sugawara:** W H A T

**Hinata:** no i don’t STOP 

**Nishinoya:** HINATA HAS A HICKEY

**Nishinoya:** HICKEY HICKEY

**Tanaka:** HICKEY HICKEY

**Hinata:** I LITERALLY DON’T

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Kenma:** lol no he doesn’t

**Kenma:** guarenteed 

**Kuroo:** kenma turn on your auto correct wtf

**Kuroo:** BUT ALSO?? WHAT WHERE

**Nishinoya:** IT’S ON HIS THIGH

**Yamaguchi:** WHAT

**Kageyama** and  **Tsukishima**

**Tsukishima:** umm kageyama????

**Kageyama:** i’m shitting i’m shitting i’m shitting

**Kageyama:** oh my god oh my gofd

**Tsukishima:** ????

_ kenam is the cutes thting i’v ecveer seen in my lfe i am literally going ot marry him and i swear to go d if anyone ever says that he isn’t the cutest i won’t hesitate to smite them on the spot i swear to god he’s so cute _

**Oikawa:** WHO DID THIS TO YOU HINATA

**Hinata:** it’s nOT A HICKEY IT’S A BRUISE

**Daichi:** lol

**Hinata:** I SWEAR

**Daichi:** ok ok ok 

**Daichi:** it’s a “bruise”

**Sugawara:** how did you get this “bruise”

**Hinata:** kageyama

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Kuroo:** WHAT

**Kuroo:** KAGEYAMA YOU DIDN’T TELL YOUR BEST FRIEND THIS???

**Kuroo:** your best friend is me btw

  
**Kageyama** and  **Hinata:**

**Kageyama:** fucking idiot why did you say that

**Kageyama:** you know exactly what they’ll be thinking with this

**Kageyama:** moron

**Kageyama:** ur giving them the wrong ideas

**Hinata:** YEAH IDIOT I GET IT

**Hinata:** HELP ME THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING

**Kageyama:** you got your dumbass self into this mess

**Hinata:** our team captain thinks you were sucking on my thigh

**Hinata:** so like

**Hinata:** this is embarrassing for you too idiot ass bitch

**Kageyama:** fuck you

_ kenam is the cutes thting i’v ecveer seen in my lfe i am literally going ot marry him and i swear to go d if anyone ever says that he isn’t the cutest i won’t hesitate to smite them on the spot i swear to god he’s so cute _

**Tanaka** changed the group name to  _ KAGEYAMA GAVE HINATA A WHAT? _

**Kageyama:** oh my god

**Kageyama:** it’s literally a bruise

**Kageyama:** i’d never go near hinata like that

**Hinata:** 🤢

**Oikawa:** yeah right

**Tsukishima:** yeah right 

**Daichi:** yeah right

**Sugawara:** daichi omg

**Hinata:** i want all of you dead 

**Hinata:** he fucking

**Hinata:** he HIT ME WITH A BASEBALL

**Hinata:** THERE’S MORE BRUISES TOO

**Hinata:** MY LEGS HURT SO BAD

**Sugawara:** i literally don’t believe you

**Hinata:** IT’S TRUE

**Nishinoya:** lol was that on wednesday??

**Nishinoya:** i think i was there for that

**Kageyama:** u were we were laughing

**Tanaka:** wasn’t that my baseball??

**Kageyama:** yeah.

**Hinata:** i really hate you guys

**Kenma:** lmaooooo to,dl u

**Kuroo:** i’m so disappointed

_ KAGEYAMA GAVE HINATA A WHAT? _

**Hinata:** kageyama come hang out with me

**Daichi:** what

**Daichi:** say this in a private chat you weirdo

**Oikawa:** no, don’t

**Oikawa:** i want to hear

**Kenma:** freak

**Kenma:** well kageyama u gonna answer him ??

**Kageyama:** sorry i don’t want to leave my house today

**Kageyama** and  **Hinata:**

**Kageyama:** idiot

**Hinata:** stupid

_ KAGEYAMA GAVE HINATA A WHAT? _

**Hinata:** i can always come over to ur house

**Asahi:** why 

**Asahi:** why are you two making plans in the groupchat

**Asahi:** in front of us

**Kageyama:** yeah that works

**Yamaguchi:** stop oh my god

**Tanaka:** no no u guys let them speak their truths

**Hinata:** ok i’m getting ready then i’ll b on my way!

**Kenma:** i swear to god

-

_ KAGEYAMA GAVE HINATA A WHAT? _

**Hinata:** i’m here come let me in!!!!

**Nishinoya:** STOPPP

  
  



	8. hinata needs sleep like kuroo needs ass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama: attached image
> 
> Kageyama: btw i win

Wednesday AM:

_ Hinata is annoying _

**Hinata** changed the group name to  _ help _

**Asahi:** ???

**Asahi:** i’m concerned 

**Kenma:** shouyou it’s… 3am..

**Kenma:** what is wrong with u

**Hinata:** oh hey guys why are you up

**Nishinoya:** yeah that’s fine asahi you can call me out in front of everyone

**Asahi:** what

**Asahi:** i didn’t even say anything!!!

**Nishinoya:** yeah that’s fine asahi just tell everyone that i’m at your house right now 😳

**Asahi:** please stop you’re embarrassing

**Asahi:** wait come back to bed 🥺

**Kenma:** do this in a separate chat you freaks i’m trying to sleep 

**-**

Wednesday PM:

_ help _

**Kuroo:** so we aren’t talking about the fact that asahi used an emoji

**Kuroo:** specifically that one

**Sugawara:** what

**Sugawara:** what’s wrong with his emoji

**Kuroo:** it’s cute

**Kuroo:** like he’s so cute for that

**Asahi:** stop

**Asahi:** kenma come get your man he’s embarrassing me

**Kenma:** no kuro keep going

**Kenma:** speak ur truth 

**Kuroo:** everyone who thinks asahi has cute energy for that… say i 

**Kenma:** i 

**Iwaizumi:** i

**Oikawa:** wtf iwa-chan 

**Oikawa:** i’m ceo of that emoji and u nvr say i’m cute 

**Oikawa:** bu also i

**Nishinoya:** actually i’m so glad you guys brought this up

**Nishinoya:** because i’ve been WAITING 

**Nishinoya:** for u all to notice how SUPERIOR MY MAN IS

**Asahi:** can i leave this groupchat

**Nishinoya:** no

**Nishinoya:** _ attached image _

**Nishinoya:** like!!!!! Look at this CUTE MAN!!!!!!!!

**Kuroo:** i’m shitting i’m shitting this is the cutest in the world. He

**Kuroo:** LOOK AT HIM

**Kuroo:** he’s just SLEEPING w that TINY BLANKET

**Daichi:** _ attached image _

**Daichi:** sorry noya but ur man isn’t the cutest mine is 🙂

**Sugawara:** oh my god when did you take that

**Nishinoya:** wait stop wait stop wait

**Nishinoya:** i didn’t know u two were in LOVE love 😳

**Tanaka:** HE’S JUST LAYING ON UR LAP??

**Tanaka:** didn’t know i needed this pic of suga in my life thanks daichi

**Iwaizumi:** _ attached image  _

**Oikawa:** OMG

**Kageyama:** wait.. why is that cute

**Oikawa:** bc i’m cute tobio what are u talking about

**Iwaizumi:** when did he say u weren’t

**Hinata:** AWWWW

**Asahi:** i see i see

**Asahi:** however i present to u

**Asahi:** yuu in MY HOODIE

**Asahi:** _ attached image _

**Tanaka:** omfgggg yuu ur so cute 

**Sugawara:** AHAHAH YOU’RE TINY

**Nishinoya:** when he shows u off 🥰😍

**Oikawa:** trophy wife tingz 🥰😍🍾

**Kuroo:** oh i didn’t know this is what we were doing

**Kuroo:** cute pics btw but lol

**Kenma:** kuro i already know what you’re about to do and don’t

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** i see you all thinking hmm kenma takes a lot of naps

**Kuroo:** yes he does and he always sleeps on me

**Kuroo:** and it’s so cute isn’t it

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** thank ur benevolent god for these later

**Kuroo:** which is me, i’m the god

**Kuroo:** ur eyeballs have been blessed today

**Kuroo:** u’ll never see anything cuter

**Oikawa:** this is the cutest thing i’ve seen in my life

**Kageyama:** awww

**Yamaguchi:** KENMA WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS SLEEPING LMAO YOU’RE SO CUTE

**Tsukishima:** _ attached image _

**Tsukishima:** i’m not a freak who takes pics of my boyfriend while he’s sleeping but here’s tadashi in my hoodie with me

**Asahi:** i have pics like that too omg

**Asahi:** _ attached image _

**Tsukishima:** lol

**Tsukishima:** short boyfriend tingz

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** small bf tingz

**Asahi:** omg

**Tsukishima:** omg

**Kuroo:** tall boyfriends rise up

**Kuroo:** we r superior

**Kuroo:** bc we have pictures like these 

**Hinata:** isn’t that pic ur lockscreen kuroo

**Kenma:** ew why would you expose him like that

**Kenma:** i’m so embarrassed

**Yamaguchi:** the pic tsukki sent is his lockscreen too lololol

**Kageyama:** wait ok

**Kageyama:** is no one going to talk about hinata changing the group name to help at 3am

**Oikawa:** no

**Daichi:** wait yeah wtf hinata shouldn’t you have been idk sleeping

**Hinata:** i haven’t slept in like two days dw

**Kageyama:** dw?????

-

Wednesday PM

**Kageyama** and  **Hinata**

**Kageyama:** why aren’t you sleeping??

**Hinata:** idk

**Hinata:** i stayed up for like

**Hinata:** 24 hours for some reason and now i can’t go to sleep

**Kageyama:** wtf???

**Hinata:** it’s fine i’ll die eventually

**Kageyama** and  **Tsukishima**

**Kageyama:** _ attached screenshot _

**Kageyama:** help 

**Tsukishima:** ?? literally how

**Kageyama:** what should i DO

**Kageyama:** i wanna help 

**Tsukishima:** wait i have an iead

**Tsukishima:** ubsdfjhsd

**Kageyama:** ?

**Tsukishima:** tadashi is grabbing at my phone 

**Tsukishima:** hang on

_ incoming call from:  _ **_Tsukishima_ **

Thursday AM:

_ help _

**Hinata:** day three 😍

**Sugawara:** HINATA

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU

**Oikawa:** SHOUYOU

**Nishinoya:** HINATA

**Daichi:** HINATA

**_-_ **

Friday AM:

_ help: _

**Hinata:** guys good news i slept two hours last night

**Kenma:** it’s 4am what is your problem

**Hinata:** what 

**Hinata:** ur literally awake

**Kuroo:** he’s been busy

**Kenma** _ left the chat _

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA

  
  
  


Friday PM:

_ help: _

**Asahi:** guys guess what omg 

**Asahi:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo** : IS THAT A KITTEN??

**Sugawara:** omg is that yours???

**Nishinoya:** he just brought it over to my house lol

**Nishinoya:** he found it on the way over.

**Asahi:** she needs a family, yuu

**Nishinoya:** lmfaooo.

**Nishinoya:** no, asahi.

Friday PM:

**Kageyama** and  **Hinata:**

**Kageyama:** hey

**Hinata:** hello?

**Kageyama:** do you want to like 

**Kageyama:** idk

**Kageyama:** come over maybe

**Hinata:** why

**Kageyama:** maybe i can help you fix your sleep schedule 

**Hinata:** there isn’t a sleep schedule to fix 😎

**Kageyama:** you’re an idiot 

**Kageyama:** nevermind. moron.

**Hinata:** what’s ur address

**Kageyama:** _ attached location _

Saturday AM:

_ help _

**Nishinoya:** so… update…

**Nishinoya:** _ attached image  _

**Nishinoya:** her name is Suzu 

**Asahi:** be more excited yuu she’s our daughter

**Oikawa:** iwa-chan we should get a cat

**Iwaizumi:** you’re allergic 

**Kenma:** oh my god ohm u god she’s so cute

**Kenma:** SHE’S SO CUTE 

**Kenma:** kuro please please please can we get a cat pklease i’m shaking i;m crying

**Kuroo:** god

**Kuroo:** look what you guys started

**Kageyama:** guys stop

**Kuroo:** omg kageyama hey 

**Kageyama:** stoppp blowing up the chat

**Oikawa:** why should we listen to you, tobio

**Kageyama:** _ attached image _

**Kageyama:** btw i win

**Oikawa:** oh my god oh my god oh my god shouyou is sleeping he’s sleeping he’s finally sleeping

**Kageyama:** STOP DON’T BLOW UP THE CHAT

-

Saturday PM:

_ help _

**Oikawa:** ok there’s no way hinata is still asleep

**Oikawa:** so i’m here to say

**Oikawa:** that’s the cutest thing ever

**Oikawa:** why is he curled up on u like that i’m literally screaming

**Iwaizumi:** he literally hasn’t shut up about this all day

**Iwaizumi:** annoying ass

**Yamaguchi:** it is cute tho

**Tsukishima:** i hate to agree with oikawa

**Tsukishima:** but he’s right

**Kuroo:** lmfao wai twait wait

**Kuroo:** i think you guys are skipping over something fundamental here

**Kuroo:** HE SAID I WIN

**Kuroo:** THAT WHOLE CONVERSATION WAS ABOUT SHOWING OFF YOUR BOYFRIEND?

**Kageyama** has removed  **Hinata** from the chat

**Nishinoya:** wait stop omg

**Oikawa:** what

**Oikawa:** tobio explain

**Oikawa:** tobio

**Oikawa:** tobio

**Oikawa:** tobio

**Kageyama:** IT’S LITERALLY 12PM

**Kageyama:** HE’S STILL ASLEEP

**Kageyama:** also we aren’t dating don’t be disgusting

**Sugawara:** i swear to god

**Tanaka:** lmfaoo hinata is straight remember

**Kenma:** AHAHAHA

  
  



	9. I didn't even proof read this teehee. Hamilton but also I'm gonna lay here and think of Kuroo eating Kenma's 🍑

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: In New York you can be a new man
> 
> Kuroo: In New York you can be a new man
> 
> Nishinoya: In New York you can be a new man
> 
> Oikawa: Helpless

_ Iwaizumi changed the group name to Oikawa STOP _

**Kageyama:** What does this mean

**Oikawa:** One week later I’m writing a letter nightly

**Kuroo:** OMG

**Oikawa:** Now my life gets better, every letter that you write me

**Kuroo:** Since you’re Eliza I guess I’m Angelica

**Asahi:** Wut

**Oikawa:** Kuroo SHUT UP YOU KNOW THIS

**Kuroo:** OF COURSE I DO

**Iwaizumi:** Dammit

**Oikawa:** Laughing at my sister cause she wants to form a harem

**Kuroo:** I’m just saying if you really loved me you would share him

**Oikawa:** HA

**Oikawa:** Two weeks later in the living room stressin

**Oikawa:** My father stone faced while you ask for his blessing

**Oikawa:** Dyin inside as you wine and dine

**Oikawa:** And I’m tryin not cry because there’s nothing that your mind can’t do

**Kuroo:** Oooh

**Oikawa:** My father makes his way across the room to you

**Kuroo:** Oooh

**Oikawa:** I panic for a second thinking we’re through

**Kuroo:** Oooh

**Oikawa:** But then he shakes your hand and says be true

**Kuroo:** Oooh 

**Oikawa:** And you turn back at me, smiling and I’m 

**Kuroo:** Helpless look into your eyes and the sky’s the limit I’m helpless

**Oikawa:** Helpless

**Kuroo:** Down for the count and I’m drownin in em

**Oikawa:** Hoo

**Kuroo:** Helpless

**Oikawa:** That boy is mine, that boy is mine

**Kuroo:** Helpless, down for the count and I’m drownin in em

**Daichi:** STOP PLEASE IT IS SO LATE 

**Iwaizumi:** EXACTLY

**Oikawa:** Fine.. We don’t have an Alexander anyways

**Iwaizumi:** Thank god

**Kageyama:** Eliza, I don’t have a dollar to my name. An acre of land, a troop to command a dollop of fame

**Kageyama:** All I have’s my honor and a tolerance for pain

**Kageyama:** A couple of college credits and my top notch brain

**Daichi:** KAGEYAMA STOP

**Kageyama:** Sorry… 

**Oikawa:** TOBIO WHAT

**Kuroo:** Kageyama 😍

**Oikawa:** Since when did you know Hamilton

**Kageyama:** I don’t really. I’ve never seen it but my sister listened to the soundtrack a lot

**Kuroo:** I knew you were my man for a reason

**Daichi:** Well Suga WAS sleeping. But now he’s awake and singing.

**Kenma:** Who got Kuro started?

**Kenma:** He is on the speaker playing Satisfied

**Kenma:** Kuro it’s 2am

**Kenma:** Omg it was oikawa who started this. Oikawa you are dead

**Nishinoya:** I was more of a Heathers kinda guy

**Asahi:** Heathers?

**Nishinoya:** You know Heathers. It has that one song

**Nishinoya:** I am Damaged

**Asahi:** Oh yeah!

**Asahi:** Far too damaged

**Nishinoya:** When he knows heathers 😳🥵

**Daichi:** It’s great that we all get along but guys please go to sleep.

**Nishinoya:** It’s the weekend though!! 😋

**Daichi:** Yes but it’s also almost 3 in the morning

**Tanaka:** Daichi

**Tanaka:** Are we gonna have a problem?

**Tanaka:** You got a bone to pick?

**Tanaka:** you’ve come so far, why now are you pulling on my dick?

**Oikawa:** LMAOOOO

**Nishinoya:** RYUU HAHAHA

**Tanaka:** THANKS! I’M GOING TO SLEEP NOW

**Nishinoya:** GOODNIGHT RYUU DREAM OF ME

**Tanaka:** When do I not?

**Nishinoya:** 🥰

**Daichi:** Suga is singing on my own aw

**Oikawa:** So when Koushi sings it’s aw but when we sing you want us to shut up?

**Oikawa:** Double standard

**Daichi:** Well Suga is cute sooo

**Daichi:** Anyways, I think we should all sleep because it’s getting late.

**Kuroo:** Sure :(

**-**

_ 4AM _

**Sugawara:** In New York you can be a new man

**Kuroo:** In New York you can be a new man

**Nishinoya:** In New York you can be a new man

**Oikawa:** Helpless

**-**

**Nishinoya:** Me and Asahi are making pizza!

**Nishinoya:** What is everyone else doing on this fine saturday night?

**Kageyama:** I’m going for a run

**Kuroo:** I wanna come with

**Kageyama:** I’d say sure but you’re all the way in Tokyo

**Kuroo:** A train ride away 😢 too far from you Kageyama

**Hinata:** Hey what the hell, you never invite me on runs

**Kageyama:** Idiot because you’d make it a competition

**Hinata:** If I promise it won’t be a race can I come?

**Kageyama:** Sure

**Hinata:** I’M GETTING READY RIGHT NOW

**Oikawa:** 😉

**Kageyama:** What

**Kenma:** 😉

**Kageyama:** What

**Oikawa:** I’m laying in bed and for some reason I can’t stop taking personality quizzes

**Oikawa:** I’ve been doing this since 1 this afternoon

**Oikawa:** I really don’t need to find out the first letter of my soulmate's name by planning a date

**Oikawa:** My soulmate's name starts with an H

**Oikawa:** But I call him Iwa-chan

**Iwaizumi:** lol you’re so embarrassing Oikawa

**Kenma:** That was weirdly gentle

**Iwaizumi:** I have my days 

**Oikawa:** 💗

**Sugawara:** Me and Daichi are cleaning

**Nishinoya:** Ew what that’s so boring

**Sugawara:** It’s weirdly therapeutic

**Sugawara:** And I steal his shirts when we reorganize his closet 😜

**Nishinoya:** CUTE SHUT UP

**Hinata:** Okay! I’m ready Kageyama

**Kageyama:** Why’d that take so long?

**Hinata:** I didn’t want to look bad

**Kageyama:** We’re just going for a run

**Hinata:** Yes but we’re going out

**Oikawa:** Going out?

**Kenma:** GOING OUT

**Oikawa:** As in???

**Hinata:** As in going out of the house?

**Kenma:** You piss me off

**Kageyama:** Whatever, I’m on my way

**Hinata:** See you when you get here 🥰

**Hinata:** I MEANT 😊

**Kenma:** Sure you did

**Tsukishima:** Yeah sure

**Oikawa:** Still not over the going out thing tbh

**Kenma:** Kuroo, are you coming over still?

**Kuroo:** Yeah, I’ll be on my way in a little

**Kuroo:** I was packing you some of the pie I have left over

**Kenma:** I love you

**Kuroo:** 😘

**Nishinoya:** Woah, I’m so used to Kenma going to your place

**Kenma:** We usually go to his place

**Kenma:** Change of scenery

**Kuroo:** 👅🍑

**Kenma:** Why are you like this

**Kuroo:** I’m only honest bbg

**Kuroo:** Also, I’m basically here Kenma

**Kageyama:** I’m here Hinata

**Hinata:** Okay! 😘

**Hinata:** I MEANT 😊

**Tsukishima:** Hmmm twice in a row. Interesting. I’m starting to think this isn’t on accident

**Oikawa:** Have fun on your weird date

**Hinata:** IT’S NOT A DATE

**Kageyama:** STOP

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	10. Stan 👅🍑 for clear skin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama: :-)
> 
> Hinata: :-)
> 
> Kageyama: :-)
> 
> Tsukishima: Stop that

_ KAGEYAMA GAVE HINATA A WHAT? _

**Sugawara:** GUYS

**Sugawara:** ME AND DAICHI ARE OUT AND ABOUT

**Sugawara:** AND WE SAW OIKAWA AND IWAIZUMI

**Sugawara:** ON A DATE

**Asahi:** They’re?? Dating???

**Daichi:** Asahi what? Why didn’t you know that

**Asahi:** I’m not very active here… But anyways

**Asahi:** sO if they’re dating, isn’t it normal for them to go on dates?

**Sugawara:** YOU DON’T GET IT

**Sugawara:** THEY WERE HOLDING HANDS

**Kuroo:** Couples hold hands all the time? Suga you’re crazy

**Sugawara:** IWAIZUMI LOOKED SO IN LOVE

**Sugawara:** SO IN LOVE LIKE THAT SHIT WAS HITTIN

**Daichi:** Suga calm down lol

**Sugawara:** Sorry I just had to get it off my chest like he was so cute

**Sugawara:** They were so cute

**Sugawara:** Anyways, I’m gonna watch a movie with Daichi

**Sugawara:** 🥰

**Hinata:** I wanna go to the movies

**Kageyama:** We can go

**Hinata:** What?

**Kageyama:** We can go to the movies together?

**Hinata:** ??

**Kenma:** HINATA

**Kenma:** HINATA STOP RUINING IT

**Kageyama:** We don’t have to go. It was just an offer

**Kageyama:** If you don’t wanna go with me it’s fine

**Hinata:** NO SORRY I WANNA GO

**Hinata:** I WSA just syrprised

**Tsukishima:** Wow

**Tsukishima:** He’s so flustered he can’t type properly 

**Hinata:** IM NIT FLUSTRTD

**Kenma:** lol sure

**Tsukishima:** Lol sure

**Sugawara:** Someone’s flustered

**Hinata:** GO WATCH YOUR MOVIE

**Sugawara:** Don’t yell at me

**Kageyama:** Lol

**Kageyama:** There’s nothing I’ve really been wanting to see so you can just tell me what you want to watch

**Hinata:** Omg!! Natsu always gets to choose! I’ll look and let you know!

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Tsukishima:** And, for some reason, we get to see them plan their first date. How wholesome.

**Hinata:** Kageyama I’m so excited!

**Asahi:** This is the perfect opportunity for you to talk in private

**Kenma:** Shut up I want to watch this happen

**Kenma:** Don’t ruin this for me!

**Asahi:** Sorry

**Kageyama:** Me too :-)

**Hinata:** :-)

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Hinata:** :-)

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Hinata:** :-)

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Tsukishima:** Stop that

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Tsukishima:** Tobio

**Kageyama:** :-(

**Kuroo:** LOOK WHAT YOU DID TSUKKI FIX IT FIX IT

**Kuroo:** Also… They didn’t deny it was a date 😈

**Kuroo:** Is it a date?

**Hinata:** IT ITSN’T

**Kageyama:** Idk

**Kageyama:** It isn’t lol

**Kageyama:** Haha

**Kenma:** omg SHOUYOU YOU PISS ME OFF

-

_ Tsukishima and Kageyama _

**Kageyama:** That was so awkward

**Tsukishima:** It wasn’t that bad. You’re overthinking it

**Tsukishima:** You asked him out tho soooo

**Tsukishima:** Kinda proud of you

**Kageyama:** Thanks :-)

**Kageyama:** WAIT WHAT

**Kageyama:** TSUKISHIMA WHAT YOURE PROUD OMG

**Kageyama:** REPLY TO ME

\--

_ Kuroo changed the group name to Just Ate Ass _

**Kuroo: 🥵🥵**

**Kenma:** So you want to die?

**Kuroo:** 👅🍑💦😈

**Kenma:** You’re being ugly 💗

**Kuroo:** 💓

**Daichi:** And you’re telling us this because?

**Kuroo:** Because I just ate ass

**Kuroo:** What more of a reason do you need

**Kuroo:** But ngl I thought this was another groupchat teehee

**Kenma:** KURO WHAT GROUPCHAT

**Kuroo:** Just a groupchat

**Kenma:** WHY ARE YOU TELLING SO MANY PEOPLE

**Kuroo:** Because I’m doing what I love and they want to see me succeed 

**Kenma:** You have to be the most embarrassing bitch out here

**Kuroo:** U kno it

**Kenma:** But who’s in the groupchat

**Kuroo:** Bokuto and Akaashi

**Kenma:** Kuro I have no words

**Kuroo:** Don’t worry, I changed the name there too

**Kuroo** changed their name to  **Ass Eater**

**Kenma** changed  **Ass Eater** ’s name to  **Kuroo**

**Kenma:** Kuro, I love you, but you’re embarrassing me

**Kuroo:** 😢 bb 

**Kenma:** I still luv u 😌

**Nishinoya:** Wish I had a man like that

**Asahi:** Noya… 

**Nishinoya:** A proud ass eater 😣 Need that energy

**Asahi:** I think

**Asahi:** I think

_ Asahi has left the chat _

**Nishinoya:** He’s a shy ass eater

**Daichi:** NOYA

-

_ Just Ate Ass _

**Oikawa:** GUYS

**Oikawa:** Ew this chat name 

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  **Iwa chan is too cute**

**Kuroo:** What happened?

**Oikawa:** IM SLEEPING AT IWA-CHAN’S HOUSE

**Oikawa:** SO WE’RE LAYING IN BED AND I LIKE CLOSE MY EYES FOR A LITTLE BECAUSE

**Oikawa:** WE WERE LISTENING TO MUSIC AND JUST LAYING THERE SO I WAS HM TIME TO JUST LIKE THINK

**Oikawa:** AND I THINK I WAS DOING IT FOR SO LONG THAT HE THOUGHT I WAS ASLEEP

**Kuroo:** ????

**Oikawa:** NO

**Oikawa:** KUROO THAT’S NOT ALL

**Oikawa:** Where is everyone???!!!!

**Oikawa:** Whatever they’ll read it in the morning

**Kuroo:** Kenma be asleep ❤️

**Kuroo:** Dude he’s so cute

**Kuroo:** Anyways sorry, go on.

**Oikawa:** OKAY SO IWA-CHAN THOUGHT I WAS ASLEEP

**Oikawa:** He LIKE GOES

**Oikawa:** Goodnight Tooru

**Oikawa:** ANd kISSES MY FOREHEAD

**Oikawa:** MY FOREHEAD. HE KISSES IT.

**Oikawa:** AND THEN HE LIKE TURNS THE MUSIC DOWN AND PULLS THE BLANKET OVER US AND THEN LIKE HE WENT TO SLEEP

**Kuroo:** Thats cute shut up

**Kuroo:** WAIT THATS SO CUTE SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** EW THATS CUTE SHUT UP

**Oikawa:** RIGHT??????

**Oikawa:** Like how long has he been doing that to me??????

**Oikawa:** I fall asleep at his house A LOT

**Oikawa:** Oh my god I’m so in love

**Kuroo:** YOU ARE SO IN LOVE

**Kuroo:** IN LOVE IN LOVE IN LOVE

**Oikawa:** Okay, just had to tell someone

**Oikawa:** Well I’m gonna actually go to sleep now

**Oikawa:** And cuddle my handsome Iwa-chan 🥰🥰

**Kuroo:** Goodnight cuties

**Oikawa:** 💖 night

**Kuroo:** Can’t wait till Iwaizumi sees that he has been exposed when he wakes up 🥰

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	11. kuroo is clingy and kageyama is a freak it's literally canon idc idc idc idc

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nishinoya: i can’t believe this
> 
> Nishinoya: u guys added OIKAWA back but NOT ASAHI?
> 
> Nishinoya: OIKAWA?
> 
> Oikawa: HEY

_KAGEYAMA GAVE HINATA A WHAT?_

**Kuroo:** i’ve been on facetime with kenma for literally 45 hours

 **Kuroo:** is this what true love means

 **Kageyama:** wish i could relate

 **Hinata:** wtf kageyama

 **Tsukishima:** why have you two been on the phone for that long

 **Tsukishima:** aren’t you normally hanging out anyway

 **Kuroo:** yes but it seems that my sweet baby kenma has gotten sick

 **Kuroo:** which isn’t something i care about but he won’t let me over 👿

 **Kenma:** kuro you don’t need to get sick

 **Kenma:** calm down

 **Kuroo:** i miss your beautiful face

 **Kuroo:** i’m so sad i miss u so much

 **Yamaguchi:** ???? u’ve been staring at him for ‘literally 45 hours’

 **Yamaguchi:** u can’t miss him that much

 **Kuroo:** i miss his ass

 **Kenma:** he misses my ass

 **Daichi:** i

 **Daichi:** didn’t expect that

 **Nishinoya** changed the group name to _Asahi I miss YOUR ass_

 **Sugawara:** asahi isn’t in this gc noya

 **Nishinoya:** WHAT

 **Suga:** he left remember??

 **Nishinoya:** AND NO ONE ADDED HIM BACK?

 **Sugawara:** YOU COULD HAVE ADDED HIM BACK TOO

 **Nishinoya:** i can’t believe this

 **Nishinoya:** u guys added OIKAWA back but NOT ASAHI?

 **Nishinoya:** OIKAWA?

 **Oikawa:** HEY

 **Nishinoya** added **Asahi** to _Asahi I miss YOUR ass_

 **Asahi:** damn

 **Asahi:** and just when i was starting to sleep without being woken up by all of u

 **Tsukishima:** do none of you people turn off your notifications when you go to sleep

 **Nishinoya:** asahi i’ve missed you

 **Asahi:** you’re literally laying on top of me right now

 **Nishinoya:** i’ve MISSED you

 **Kuroo:** he’s laying on you????

 **Kuroo:** awww

 **Kuroo:** kenma…..

 **Kuroo:** kenma please….

 **Kenma:** kuro stop

**Kuroo: 😭**

Monday AM

_Asahi I miss YOUR ass_

**Kuroo:** i LIED OK

 **Kuroo:** i can’t stop THINKING ABOUT IT

 **Kuroo:** u guys don’t understand

 **Kuroo:** i CAN’T FALL ASLEEP

 **Kuroo:** because i don’t have my ARMS AROUND HIM

 **Kuroo:** i MISS PLAYING WITH HIS HAIR AND WATCHING HIM FALL ASLEEP TO IT

 **Kuroo:** head empty thoughts kenma

 **Kenma:** jesus christ

 **Sugawara:** wonder what that’s like 🥰

 **Sugawara:** daichi is always here with me 🥰🥰

 **Kuroo:** suga 

**Kuroo:** you are so cruel

 **Asahi:** GO TO SLEEP

Friday PM

_Asahi I miss YOUR ass_

**Kenma:** guess who’s feeling better but isn’t going to leave the house still

 **Kenma:** bc she DO be just so depressed tho

 **Kuroo:** I’M COMING OVER

 **Daichi:** finally omfg.

 **Daichi:** maybe he’ll shut up now

-

**Kuroo:** _attached image_

**Kuroo:** yes that’s kenma sleeping on me yes the balance has been restored to the world once more

 **Tsukishima:** you’re so annoying

Saturday AM

**Hinata and Kenma:**

**Hinata:** i just got this really good idea

 **Kenma:** i’m sure it isn’t but ok

 **Kenma:** what is it

 **Hinata:** watch watch watch

_Asahi I miss YOUR ass_

**Hinata:** i’m so bored :(

 **Hinata:** i have nothing to doooo

 **Hinata:** someone hang out with meeee

**Hinata and Kenma:**

**Kenma:** you’re a genius

_Asahi I miss YOUR ass_

**Kageyama:** wtf stop spamming the groupchat

 **Hinata:** but i’m boreddddd

 **Kageyama:** do you want to come over to my house?

 **Oikawa:** omg

 **Hinata:** yes!!!! I’ll get ready now

 **Tsukishima:** wow

 **Asahi:** please guys please just message each other in your own chats

Saturday PM

_Asahi I miss YOUR ass_

**Kageyama:** Hinata smells good.

 **Oikawa:** ...excuse me?

 **Daichi:** what

 **Tanaka:** wtf

 **Kageyama:** sorry wrong chat

 **Asahi:** ???

 **Asahi:** what kind of conversations are you having kageyama

_**Nishinoya** changed the group name to Hinata smells good_

**Hinata:** you think i smell good?

 **Kageyama:** Yeah.

**Tsukishima and Kageyama:**

**Kageyama:** i’m so embarrassed

 **Kageyama:** that was supposed to go to you

 **Tsukishima:** you’re so stupid why don’t you read the chats you’re clicking on more carefully

 **Kageyama:** i’m overwhelmed ok

 **Kageyama:** and it’s not my fault they blow up the gc so much that it’s always in my recents

 **Kageyama:** but he smells like strawberries

 **Kageyama:** like his hair does

 **Kageyama:** i can’t handle it

 **Tsukishima:** … why are you smelling his hair

 **Kageyama:** i like

 **Kageyama:** had my chin on top of his head

 **Tsukishima:** what situation were you in for this to happen i’m so confused

 **Kageyama:** i don’t know

 **Kageyama:** i don’t know what’s happening anymore

Sunday AM

_Hinata smells good_

**Hinata:** what do i smell like?  
 **Kenma:** probably shit

 **Oikawa:** shit

 **Kageyama:** strawberries

 **Daichi:** shit

 **Tanaka:** shit

 **Hinata:** hmmmm

 **Nishinoya:** strawberries??? Wtf

 **Kageyama:** it’s his shampoo i think

 **Kageyama:** it was his hair

 **Nishinoya:** you’re getting too comfortable in this groupchat kageyama

 **Oikawa:** tobio why were you smelling his hair

 **Kenma:** i have no words

 **Daichi:** what..

 **Hinata:** i was sitting on him for a second idk maybe it was then

 **Tanaka:** so like… u two were cuddling

 **Kageyama:** yeah i guess

 **Kuroo:** so…. Cuddling… were u guys like… on a little date or….

 **Hinata:** what? I wouldn’t go on a date with the idiot

 **Kageyama:** Ew. I wouldn’t do that kind of thing with Hinata.

 **Kenma:** i literally have no words

 **Tanaka** changed the group name to _hinata’s hair smells good because for some reason they were cuddling but they won’t admit they want to go on a date_

 **Sugawara:** it’s 4am can all of you please go to sleep 

**Daichi:** go to sleep guys wtf!!!

 **Sugawara:** lmfaoooo. daichi don’t even act like u weren’t participating in that conversation 

**Tanaka:** uh-oh 😳 trouble in paradise?

 **Sugawara:** tanaka.

 **Tanaka:** goodnight!!!!

**Daichi and Sugawara:**

**Sugawara:** i love you. goodnight 🥰❤️

 **Daichi:** i love you too❤️❤️❤️

Tuesday PM

_hinata’s hair smells good because for some reason they were cuddling but they won’t admit they want to go on a date_

**Nishinoya:** shouyou what are you wearing

 **Asahi:** leave him alone he looks cute

 **Kenma:** what

 **Kenma:** what is he wearing

 **Daichi:** ???

 **Kageyama:** ?

 **Hinata:** stoppp natsu wanted to pick out my outfit today lol

 **Nishinoya:** he’s wearing green overalls

 **Asahi:** leave him be he looks cute

 **Kageyama:** and you two know this why ?

 **Oikawa:** jealous tobio?

 **Nishinoya:** we saw him when we were out on a date 😍

 **Asahi:** lol he was at the store

 **Asahi:** yuu we were literally at the store

 **Oikawa:** shouyou don’t be shy show us your outfit

 **Sugawara:** don’t be shy, show us

 **Hinata:** attached image

**Tsukishima and Kageyama:**

**Kageyama:** tsukki i’m dying

 **Kageyama:** he’s so cute

 **Tsukishima:** tell him

_hinata’s hair smells good because for some reason they were cuddling but they won’t admit they want to go on a date_

**Kageyama:** hinata you’re cute

 **Hinata:** thanks

**Kenma and Hinata:**

**Kenma:** are you fucking kidding me shouyou

 **Kenma:** why did you say thanks

 **Hinata:** I DIDN’T MEAN TO I PANICKED

**Tsukishima and Kageyama:**

**Tsukishima:** i didn’t mean to say it in the groupchat you idiot

 **Kageyama:** I PANICKED OKAY

_hinata’s hair smells good because for some reason they were cuddling but they won’t admit they want to go on a date_

**Hinata:** kageyama you’re cute too

 **Kageyama:** ..thanks

 **Kenma:** i literally hate you two

 **Kenma:** i really, really do.


	12. Daichi and Suga are stupid and in love but honestly, who didn't know that?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tanaka: Sorry Noya! Just got home
> 
> Nishinoya: I MISSED YOU SO MUCH
> 
> Tanaka: I MISSED YOU TOO
> 
> Asahi: Guys you
> 
> Asahi: Just saw each other?

_hinata’s hair smells good because for some reason they were cuddling but they won’t admit they want to go on a date_

**Nishinoya:** sigh

 **Nishinoya:** Sigh sigh

 **Nishinoya:** … 

**Nishinoya:** Sigh

 **Nishinoya:** SIGH SIGH SIGH SIGH SIGH SIGH

 **Nishinoya:** DOES NO ONE CARE ABOUT ME?

 **Nishinoya:** This is the end. I’m gonna die alone

 **Hinata:** I was doing homework sorry

 **Hinata:** And Yamaguchi is with me

 **Hinata:** What’s wrong

 **Nishinoya:** I miss Ryuu :(

 **Hinata:** Text him?

 **Nishinoya:** I did. We’re texting right now

 **Hinata:** I don’t know what you want from me

 **Nishinoya:** I want Ryuu 😤

 **Nishinoya:** RYUUUU

 **Asahi:** Noya please

 **Asahi:** If you’re texting him I don’t see the problem.

 **Asahi:** He’s on his way home, can you give him some time?

 **Nishinoya:** I miss him

 **Asahi:** He literally just left.

 **Nishinoya:** He’s not replying now!

 **Asahi:** BECAUSE HE’S WALKING HOME

 **Nishinoya:** Why are you mad at me? 😞

 **Nishinoya:** First I don’t have Ryuu and now my boyf is mad at me

 **Asahi:** I’m literally not mad

 **Nishinoya:** 😔😔

 **Asahi:** Why are you like this?

 **Daichi:** Stop being a brat, Noya

 **Nishinoya:** It’s because ASAHI HASN’T KISSED ME ALL DAY

 **Hinata:** Literally you never said that

 **Nishinoya:** UM I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO SAY IT

 **Nishinoya:** ASAHI MY KISSOMETER IS RUNNING LOW

 **Daichi:** You are too much right now.

 **Sugawara:** 🙃 Noya calm down

 **Nishinoya:** Well now my kissometer is full. Thank you Asahi.

 **Asahi:** Sorry. We’ve been so busy all day I didn’t even notice 🥺

 **Nishinoya:** ♥️

 **Tanaka:** Sorry Noya! Just got home

 **Nishinoya:** I MISSED YOU SO MUCH

 **Tanaka:** I MISSED YOU TOO

 **Asahi:** Guys you

 **Asahi:** Just saw each other?

 **Nishinoya:** I will never stop needing to see him

 **Nishinoya:** Tanaka is my bro, my guy, my rock

 **Sugawara:** I’m sure if Asahi had just left instead you’d react the same

 **Nishinoya:** Asahi is my rock

 **Nishinoya:** My tall, handsome, warm, loving, gives the best hugs, is a great kisser, dresses so good, shy, nervous but cute, handsome, great at volleyball, strong, handsome rock.

 **Hinata:** aw how sweet

 **Tanaka:** HAHA WHAT ARE YOU EVEN SAYING NOYA

 **Nishinoya:** The truth

 **Asahi:** Stop that

 **Sugawara:** HAHSH

 **Hinata:** I thought it was cute

 **Tanaka:** Of course you did

 **Hinata:** Where is Kageyama?

 **Hinata:** I mean everyone

 **Hinata:** Where is everyone?

 **Sugawara:** Is Kageyama not with you?

 **Hinata:** No? Why would he be?

 **Sugawara:** Idk, you guys seem to be together a lot.

 **Hinata:** He hasn’t texted me all day actually

 **Oikawa:** Sorry, I was catching up with the chat

 **Oikawa:** Daichi, how do you do it?

 **Oikawa:** Your team is so clingy. How do you maintain them?

 **Daichi:** With Suga!

 **Oikawa:** You maintain your team by depending on another person

 **Oikawa:** You guys would be a trainwreck without each other

 **Sugawara:** Is your team not like this?

 **Oikawa:** They’re all pretty independent. They kinda do everything themselves

 **Daichi:** It’s kinda fun to do

 **Daichi:** It’s like dealing with 10 headaches

 **Sugawara:** Aw

 **Sugawara:** That’s sweet

 **Oikawa:** What are you talking about? That sounds horrible. Koushi you are insane

 **Sugawara:** I wasn’t included in the 10 🥰

 **Daichi:** If they’re headaches, you’re advil😚

 **Sugawara:** 😚 Daichiiii

 **Sugawara** changed the group name to _I LUV DAICHI_

 **Asahi:** Did you guys just text kiss?

 **Oikawa:** I think

 **Oikawa:** I think I hate them

 **Hinata:** I think it’s cute

 **Oikawa:** HINATA YOU THINK EVERYTHING IS CUTE YOU EVEN THINK TOBIO IS CUTE

 **Hinata:** Why did you have to bring that up?

 **Oikawa:** BECAUSE YOU’RE STUPID

 **Hinata:** IM EMBARRASSED 

**Oikawa:** GOOD YOU DESERVE IT

 **Oikawa:** ANYONE WHO THINKS TOBIO IS CUTE SHOULD BE EMBARRASSED

 **Hinata:** WELL HE IS CUTE SO I THINK IM GONNA BE EMBARRASSED FOREVER

 **Hinata:** How do I go about deleting a message from a group chat?

 **Sugawara:** you can't ☺️

 **Hinata** removed **Kageyama** from _I LUV DAICHI_

 **Oikawa** added **Kageyama** to _I LUV DAICHI_

 **Hinata** removed **Kageyama** from _I LUV DAICHI_

 **Sugawara** added **Kageyama** to _I LUV DAICHI_

 **Tsukishima:** So screenshots exist

 **Oikawa:** HAHAH

 **Hinata:** TSUKISHIMA NO

 **Kenma:** Love waking up to chaos 😌

 **Kenma:** Especially when it involves Shouyou

 **Hinata:** Why are you all like this

**Tsukishima and Kageyama**

**Tsukishima:** _Attached Image_

 **Tsukishima:** Also, earlier he was asking where you were so maybe text him when you get home

 **Tsukishima:** Or the group

_I LUV DAICHI_

**Kenma:** I wish Kuroo would wake up

 **Kenma:** I want coffee

 **Nishinoya:** why don’t you just get coffee?

 **Kenma:** Because if he wakes up he’ll make it for me

 **Oikawa:** Lazy

 **Kenma:** It’s what I deserve 

**Sugawara:** Daichi brings me coffee before school 😊

 **Oikawa:** What doesn’t Daichi do?

 **Sugawara:** Daichi only does everything right

 **Sugawara:** And he’s so caring

 **Sugawara:** And he’s handsome

 **Sugawara:** Love that man

 **Kenma:** You guys are gross

 **Kenma:** And married

 **Sugawara:** Me, but Daichi’s wife 😩 I need that

 **Sugawara:** And Kageyama as our son

 **Sugawara:** Koushi Sawamura

 **Sugawara:** Tobio Sawamura

 **Nishinoya:** You’re being so vocal with your love today, Suga

 **Sugawara:** Idk why, it just felt like it was right

 **Sugawara:** That and I need to put my thoughts somewhere because I spent every day with him last week and am absolutely OVERWHELMED by the love I feel

 **Kageyama:** My notifications look horrible

 **Hinata:** Kageyama!

 **Kageyama:** Hi

 **Hinata:** Hi!!

 **Hinata:** Where were you all day?

 **Kageyama:** I was helping Miwa move into her apartment, sorry

 **Kenma:** Did Tsukishima send you anything?

 **Kageyama:** Yes

 **Oikawa:** And?

 **Kageyama:** I think Hinata is cuter

 **Hinata:** SHUT UP

**Kenma** **and Hinata**

 **Kenma:** why would you say that

 **Kenma:** HE WAS BEING NICE AND YOU TELL HIM TO SHUT UP

 **Kenma:** HINATA HE’S TRYIGN

 **Hinata:** IM SORRTY

_I LUV DAICHI_

**Hinata:** You’re cuter

 **Kageyama:** I’m not

 **Hinata:** You are

 **Kageyama:** I’m not

 **Hinata:** You are

 **Kageyama:** I’m not!

 **Hinata:** You are!

 **Kageyama:** I’M NOT

 **Oikawa:** Why is this happening

 **Oikawa:** Just compliment each other like normal people please


	13. lol needy by ariana grande but it's this chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama: hinata you can come over to my house…
> 
> Kenma: for what kageyama
> 
> Oikawa: for what kageyama
> 
> Tanaka: for what kageyama
> 
> Kageyama: u know….

**Tuesday PM**

_ I LUV DAICHI _

**Kenma:** umm….

**Kenma:** i don’t know what’s happening..

**Kuroo:** what’s happening bbg what’s wrong?

**Oikawa:** ???

**Daichi:** ?

**Kenma:** i… miss ? shouyou?

**Kenma:** a lot??

**Hinata:** AWWWW

**Kageyama:** me too

**Oikawa:** tobio what

**Kenma:** this isn’t about you kageyama

**Nishinoya:** I MISS RYU

**Oikawa:** yeah we already know 

**Kuroo:** i MISS BOKUTO

**Tsukishima:** ew.

**Yamaguchi:** u have a life outside of kenma??

**Kuroo:** lol of course i have a life outside of kenma 

**Kuroo:** and that life is bokuto

**Hinata:** who is that

**Oikawa:** don’t ask

**Hinata:** WHO IS THAT?

**Kageyama:** idiot typing it in all caps doesn’t change anything

**Kenma:** you really don’t want him in this shouyou

**Kenma:** trust me

**Kuroo** added  **Bokuto** to the chat

**Hinata:** YESSS

**Bokuto:** KUROO ANOTHER GROUPCHAT?

**Bokuto** : WHAT’S UP EVERYBODY

**Kuroo** : BOKUTO I MISS YOU

**Bokuto:** OH YEAH?🤔😳 

**Kuroo:** YEAH🤗😳

**Kenma** has removed  **Bokuto** from the chat

**Kuroo:** KENMAAAAA

**Kenma:** you already have like five groupchats with bokuto    
**Kenma:** and i’m in like three of them. i don’t need to add the stress of a fourth bokuto and kuroo groupchat to my notifications

**Daichi:** FIVE?

**Kuroo:** i … actually have 7..

**Daichi:** is that including the one i’m in?

**Kuroo:** ok… i have 8 then…

**Tanaka:** wait daichi ur in another groupchat?

**Kenma:** how is that the only thing you got from this conversation

**Daichi** : it’s a team captains gc 

**Tanaka:** SOUNDS COOL

**Kenma:** ANYWAY

**Kenma:** THAT’S PROVING MY POINT YOU FREAK

**Kuroo:** BUT I MISS HIM..

**Kenma:** YOU TALK TO HIM ON THE PHONE EVERYDAY

**Kenma:** AND PLAY VOLLEYBALL WITH HIM ALL THE TIME

**Hinata:** YEAH

**Kageyama:** hinata why are you including yourself in this

**Hinata:** kenma seems passionate about this and if kenma’s passionate then i’m passionate

**Kageyama** : you’re not passionate about things i’m passionate about

**Hinata:** YES I AM

**Kenma:** WHY are you two doing this?

**Kenma:** GO DO THIS SOMEWHERE ELSE

**Kuroo** : i may talk to bokuto everyday but i STILL MISS HIM

**Kuroo** : Noya understands me…

**Nishinoya** : I DO UNDERSTAND

**Tanaka** added  **Bokuto** to the chat

**Tanaka:** I UNDERSTAND TOO

**Bokuto:** ME TOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

**Bokuto** : SOMEONE IS MISSING FROM THIS GROUPCHAT….

**Kuroo:** yes yes YES YES 

**Bokuto** added  **Akaashi:**

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI!!!!!

**Akaashi** left the chat

**Bokuto:** akaashi :(

**Kenma** removed  **Bokuto** from the chat

**Kuroo** added  **Bokuto** to the chat

**Kenma** removed  **Bokuto** from the chat

**Tanaka** added  **Bokuto** to the chat

**Bokuto:** KENMA WHY

**Kenma** removed  **Bokuto** from the chat

**Nishinoya** added  **Bokuto** to the chat

**Bokuto** : PLEASE JUST LET ME STAY

**Kenma** u have 24 hours

**Bokuto:** CAN I AT LEAST ADD AKAASHI…

**Kenma:** yes bc i love akaashi 💗💗💗

**Bokuto** added  **Akaashi** to the chat **:**

**Bokuto** : i think i love him more but ok

**Akaashi:** aw

**Akaashi:** but i still don’t want to be in another groupchat

**Akaashi** left the chat

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI:((((

**Friday PM**

**Kenma** **and** **Hinata**

**Hinata:** kenma

**Hinata:** come visit me and WE CAN CUDDLE

**Hinata:** I CAN EVEN INVITE OIKAWA OVER 

**Hinata:** IT'LL BE LIKE WHEN WE WERE KIDS

**Kenma:** STOPPP I WISH

**Kenma:** guess i’ll just have to cuddle with kuroo 😔✊🏻

**Hinata:** as if that isn’t ur favorite thing to do…

**Kenma:** someone’s just bitter

_ I LUV DAICHI _

**Kenma:** hinata’s sad 

**Kageyama:** why

**Kageyama:** what’s wrong with him 

**Tsukishima:** i didn’t know his brain was complex enough to get sad

**Kageyama** : kei don’t be mean to him if he’s sad 

**Daichi:** WOW

**Kenma:** he misses my cuddles

**Oikawa:** I MISS YOUR CUDDLES TOO

**Kuroo** removed  **Hinata** and  **Oikawa** from the chat

**Daichi:** LMFAO KUROO

**Bokuto:** AHAHAHAHA

**Kenma:** bokuto why are you still here

**Bokuto:** KENMA PLEASE LET ME STAY

**Bokuto:** even tho i’m incomplete here without… 

**Bokuto** added  **Akaashi** to the chat

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI!!!

**Akaashi:** please stop

**Akaashi** left the chat

**Bokuto** : akaashi has spoken 😪

**Tsukishima:** omg

**Bokuto:** if no one wants me here anyway.. 💔💔💔

**Kenma:** yes, leave

**Kuroo:** BOKUTO NO!!!!!

**Bokuto** left the chat

**Kuroo:** BOKUTO!!!!!!😭😭😭💔💔

**Kuroo** set the group name to  _ BOKUTO!!!😭 _

**Kageyama:** where’s hinata

**Kageyama** added  **Hinata** to the chat

**Hinata:** kageyama!

**Kageyama:** Hinata!

**Hinata:** kageyama!

**Kageyama:** Hinata!

**Daichi:** stop

**Iwaizumi** added  **Oikawa** to the chat

**Oikawa:** YAY

**Oikawa:** hinata i can come cuddle u🥰🤲🏻

**Iwaizumi:** u will not

**Oikawa:** yes sir 😳😳😍

**Sugawara:** ew stop

**Kageyama:** hinata you can come over to my house…

**Kenma:** for what kageyama

**Oikawa:** for what kageyama

**Tanaka:** for what kageyama

**Kageyama:** u know….

**Hinata:** no

**Kageyama:** no as in no to coming over or no as in no you don’t know 

**Kenma:** what does that mean

**Daichi:** jesus christ

**Yamaguchi:** hinata just go over to kageyama’s and cuddle him

**Hinata:** hang on i have to do something

-

**Kenma** and  **Hinata:**

**Kenma:** wtf

**Kenma:** i know for a fact you have nothing to do rn

**Kenma:** just go???

**Kenma:** why are you ruining my life

**Hinata:** i have to wash my hair

**Kenma:** oh my god 

-

_ BOKUTO!!!😭 _

**Kenma:** _ attached screenshot _

**Sugawara:** LMAO

**Tsukishima:** oh good kageyama’s favorite smell 

**Kageyama:** skfhskdjsk

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Daichi:** graceful as always...

-

**Hinata:** i'm on my way kageyama!!

**Iwaizumi:** strawberry head and all

**Sugawara:** LMFAOOO


	14. me going off about Yui Michimiya because I hate her but I'm Suga

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: OIKAWA
> 
> Sugawara: In this house, we DO NOT resort to violence

_ BOKUTO!!!  _ 😭

**Oikawa:** Crazy random quick hypothetical question

**Oikawa:** How does one say

**Oikawa:** Hypothetically speaking

**Oikawa: “** I don’t want to go on a date with you because I have a boyfriend who treats me nicely and I’ve loved him ever since we were kids

**Oikawa:** And I’ll never want to go on a date with you because not only do I not like you that way, but also I will never stop loving my boyfriend so there’s literally no chance for you or anyone ever”

**Oikawa:** Without sounding like a bitch

**Oikawa:** Hypothetically speaking that is

**Sugawara:** You say “Sorry but I have a boyfriend who i really love so I can’t go on a date with you”

**Kenma:** You say “ew”

**Kuroo:** You say “Better luck next time loser”

**Oikawa:** Okay, thank you KOUSHI

**Oikawa:** One of the few sane ones in the chat

**Sugawara:** Of course!

**Iwaizumi:** Who was it?

**Oikawa:** It was hypothetical teehee

**Iwaizumi:** Dumbass who was it?

**Oikawa:** Just a guy Iwa-chan no worries!  (*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)

**Oikawa:** I just texted him that i can’t go

**Iwaizumi:** Just tell me who it is

**Iwaizumi:** Why does he have your number?

**Iwaizumi:** Why were you texting him if he likes you?

**Iwaizumi:** Was it Terushima again?

**Oikawa:** Yeah, it was Terushima

**Iwaizumi:** okay

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan it’s fine. It was just a text

**Iwaizumi:** I want to kill him

**Oikawa:** It’s not that serious

**Iwaizumi:** Then I want to beat his ass

**Oikawa:** That’s more reasonable

**Kenma:** OIKAWA

**Sugawara:** OIKAWA

**Sugawara:** In this house, we DO NOT resort to violence

**Oikawa:** If Iwa-chan wants to get rid of an annoying guy, it’s fine by me

**Sugawara:** Think about what you’re teaching Hinata

**Hinata:** y me

**Oikawa:** Oh please, if anything Tobio needs to be kept in line.

**Oikawa:** What is Shouyou gonna do? Use his strawberry scent to ward off girls from Tobio

**Kageyama:** y me

**Kenma:** Idiots

**Hinata:** I think strawberries smell good

**Kageyama:** Me too

**Kenma:** Cute

**Sugawara:** Oikawa, that is besides the point.

**Sugawara:** And Iwaizumi, a guy who hits on someone who is obviously taken is just asking for attention! Don’t feed into it

**Sugawara:** Oikawa told him that he isn’t going. If he can’t accept that then it isn’t your problem.

**Iwaizumi:** Fine

**Kuroo:** Mom mode Suga

**Sugawara:** It’s what I do best

**Kenma** changed the group name to  **Suga is a mom**

**Daichi:** Jealousy is normal though, and it feels horrible so don’t feel too bad

**Kuroo:** Here comes dad

**Sugawara:** Exactly! 

**Asahi:** I feel like I’ve never really seen Daichi or Suga get jealous

**Daichi:** … 

**Sugawara:** Daichi… 

**Oikawa:** TELL US

**Kenma:** I demand this story

**Daichi:** It’s kinda minor

**Sugawara:** Minor lmao sure

**Nishinoya:** OMG IS THIS ABOUT WHO I THINK IT’S ABOUT

**Tanaka:** IT TOTALLY IS

**Oikawa:** WHO WHO WHO

**Kuroo:** WHO WHO WHO

**Kenma:** Stop saying that, it reminds me of Bokuto… 

**Sugawara:** Ew ew I hate talking about her cause I get so pissed off

**Sugawara:** There’s this girl from Karasuno. She’s on the girls volleyball team

**Sugawara:** and I SWEAR she has a crush on Daichi

**Sugawara:** But daichi always denies

**Daichi:** Suga, we’re friends

**Sugawara:** FRIENDS BUT SHE WANTS YOUR DICK

**Sugawara:** AND YOUR LOVE AND AFFECTION

**Sugawara:** ALL OF THOSE ARE MINE

**Oikawa:** Suddenly the calm about jealousy Koushi is gone

**Sugawara:** She doesn’t even try to hide it. I think she’s under the impression that it’s a competition

**Sugawara:** But it isn’t because Daichi is mine.

**Daichi:** Suga please

**Sugawara:** Once, she brought him a good luck charm for a game. BITCH I AM DAICHI’S GOOD LUCK CHARM

**Daichi:** So yes, jealousy is totally normal.

**Kuroo:** I’m pretty sure Lev has a big ass crush on Kenma

**Kenma:** Ew Kuro

**Kenma:** Why would you say that??? Like ew

**Kenma:** You just gave me the chills

**Kuroo:** Because I’m like positive he has a crush on you

**Kuroo:** He always asks about you and wants to bother you. And he always says you’re cute and stuff

**Kuroo:** So I make him run extra laps 😎 Because I know Kenma is cute, you don’t have to tell me

**Kenma:** I want to transfer schools

**Kenma:** No. That’s not enough

**Kenma:** I need to leave Japan. I don’t want to look at Lev again

**Hinata:** Well he’s on your team so…

**Kenma:** Kuro kick him off of the team

**Kuroo:** As much as I want to, I can’t just do that. Also, he’s got potential so... 

**Kuroo:** Now that I think about it, Tsukki is probably popular

**Tsukishima:** why bring me into this

**Kuroo:** Because I want to know, are you?

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki’s super popular! 

**Kuroo:** And you don’t get upset?

**Yamaguchi:** No, none of them do anything. They just like, talk about him.

**Kenma:** Well, if Tsukishima is popular does that mean Kageyama is popular?

**Oikawa:** He wishes

**Daichi:** Actually, yes

**Hinata:** Wut

**Daichi:** Yeah, sometimes girls stop by the gym and try to watch practice but Ukai turns them away

**Hinata:** Wut

**Daichi:** And once I watched him get confessed to

**Hinata:** WUt

**Daichi:** Well I watched on accident

**Kageyama:** I felt really bad for her

**Daichi:** Yeah, so did I

**Sugawara:** But at least you were nice about it!

**Oikawa:** I never thought he’d be popular

**Hinata:** Well he’s tall and polite. And he’s a genius when it comes to volleyball

**Hinata:** That’s what the girls in my classes say haha

**Kenma:** Yeah sure

**Oikawa:** Yeah the girls in your classes

**Oikawa:** I bet that’s exactly who says that

**Hinata:** Why are you always like this

**Kenma:** Because you piss us off


	15. Hinata is an idiot and everyone knows that

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata: 😧
> 
> Oikawa: WHY DO YOU USE THE ONE WITH EYEBROWS
> 
> Hinata: He’s cute
> 
> Oikawa: no he is not!

_ Suga is a mom _

**Asahi:** hello!

**Asahi:** What is everyone doing this weekend?

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI

**Nishinoya:** I wanna see you 🥺

**Asahi:** You can come over

**Nishinoya:** OMW OMW OMW

**Asahi:** ☺️

**Yamaguchi:** I’m not doing anything this weekend

**Yamaguchi:** So as of right now I’m gonna take lots of naps!

**Hinata:** Natsu wants me to teach her how to play volleyball

**Tsukishima:** She couldn’t find anyone better?

**Hinata:** wow okay

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI AHAH

**Oikawa:** Me and Iwa-chan are spending time with Takeru

**Kuroo:** Me and Kenma are sleeping over at Bokuto’s tonight!

**Kenma:** Woo

**Oikawa:** I thought Bokuto annoys you

**Kenma:** He exhausts me, but Akaashi will be there and we can ignore them

**Kuroo:** WHAT DO YOU MEAN “THEM” KENMA YOU LOVE ME

**Kenma:** But Bokuto is so loud with you

**Kuroo:** Bokuto is always loud

**Kuroo:** I love him

**Kuroo:** And he loves you Kenma!

**Kenma:** I don’t hate him. He’s just annoying

**Kuroo:** OMG I HAVE TO TELL HIM

**Kenma:** Stop please don’t

**Kenma:** He’ll probably hug me

**Kenma:** Ew

**Hinata:** A sleepover? That sounds so fun!

**Daichi:** Sounds like a mess

**Hinata:** 😧

**Oikawa:** WHY DO YOU USE THE ONE WITH EYEBROWS

**Hinata:** He’s cute

**Oikawa:** no he is not!

**Daichi:** Anyways, Suga and I are making dinner for my mom tomorrow while she’s at work

**Yamaguchi:** That’s cute!

**Daichi:** Yes! My mom loves Suga

**Sugawara:** ❤️ I love her too

**Hinata:** Is Tsukishima just gonna insult me then leave?

**Hinata:** Like, not even tell us his weekend plans?

**-**

**Kenma:** update: Bokuto hugged me

**Kenma:** like picked me up and spinned me around

**Kenma:** spinned?

**Kenma:** span?

**Kenma:** Spun???

**Kenma:** whatever

**Kenma:** _ Attached Image _

**Kenma:** Akaashi says hello

**Oikawa:** Hello fellow pretty setter

**Kageyama:** Hello Akaashi!

**Kageyama:** Akaashi is pretty

**Hinata:** Um

**Oikawa:** HAHA

**Kenma:** Akaashi says thank you

**Kenma:** He’s also acting very shy aw aw

**Hinata:** UM

**Kageyama:** ??

**Hinata:** Am I not pretty?

**Kageyama:** What?

**Hinata:** You never say I’m pretty

**Kageyama:** I didn’t know I had to

**Oikawa:** Yeah, why would he have to Hinata?

**Hinata:** Just because… 

**Kenma:** lol

**Kageyama:** I say you’re cute

**Hinata:** But cute and pretty aren’t the same!!!

**Kageyama:** I don’t know what you want from me

**Hinata:** Well I DON’T KNOW EITHER KAGEYAMA JEEZ

**Hinata:** STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS JEEZ

**Oikawa:** You are being so

**Oikawa:** So embarrassing

**Kageyama:** I know pretty and cute are different dumbass

**Hinata:** so you don’t think I’m pretty?

**Kageyama:** you’re more cute than you are pretty

**Kageyama:** that doesn’t mean you’re not pretty. It just means you’re cute

**Hinata:** you’re weird

**Oikawa:** no, you’re being weird shouyou

**Hinata:** then who do you consider pretty?

**Kageyama:** akaashi, Oikawa and suga

**Kageyama:** Kiyoko is also pretty

**Tanaka:** she really is 😫

**Sugawara:** aw thank you

**Sugawara:** my son is so sweet

**Oikawa:** omg Tobio what

**Oikawa:** you think I’m pretty

**Kageyama:** yes

**Oikawa:** good. Everyone should

**Kageyama:** but Hinata, you’re cute

**Kageyama:** like Kenma and Yamaguchi and Yachi and Noya

**Kageyama:** except you’re the cutest

**Kenma:** I would be offended but I’m living for THIS MOMENT

**Oikawa:** SHUT UP SHUT UP

**Nishinoya:** Kageyama thinks I’m cute 😎

**Asahi:** stop ruining their moment

**Hinata:** but why can’t I be pretty???

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Tsukishima:** you are, somehow, worse than I thought

**Kenma:** next time I see you shouyou, I’m beating you up

**Kageyama** left the chat

**Kuroo:** WHY DID MY MAN LEAVE


	16. i'm kenma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: i have this really fun game idea you guys do you want to play it!!!
> 
> Daichi: no
> 
> Sugawara: no
> 
> Tsukishima: no
> 
> Kenma: no
> 
> Iwaizumi: no

Monday AM

_ Suga is a mom _

**Kenma:** do you guys ever turn the hot water all the way up in the shower just so you can feel something

**Kageyama:** yes

**Daichi:** ????!

**Sugawara:** lol yes

**Daichi:** !!!!!!!

**Daichi:** doesn’t that hurt?

**Hinata:** yes

**Yamaguchi:** yeah

**Daichi:** guys

**Daichi:** guys wtf

**Nishinoya:** i love hot showers

**Nishinoya:** they’re so amazing

**Nishinoya:** doesn’t EVERYONE agree??

**Nishinoya:** i mean no PSYCHOPATH likes cold showers 

**Nishinoya:** because they’re HORRIBLE

**Asahi:** why do you do this to me all the time

**Nishinoya:** BECAUSE COLD SHOWERS AREN’T ENJOYABLE ASAHI

**Asahi:** they are!! You just won’t give them a chance!

**Nishinoya:** BECAUSE I’M NOT A FREAK

**Kuroo:** i take a lot of cold showers if u know what i mean ;)

**Oikawa:** why do that when you can just

**Oikawa:** you know ;)

**Iwaizumi:** it’s too early for you guys to be talking about this

**Kuroo:** it’s 10AM!

**Nishinoya:** kuroo ur bf is the one who started it

**Kuroo:** we all know kenma would never start a conversation if he thought it would lead to us talking about jacking off

**Kenma:** i literally hate you so fucking much

**Kenma:** can u come over :(

**Kuroo:** yeah on my way bbg :(

**Asahi:** you two are so strange   
  


-

Monday PM

_ Suga is a mom _

**Hinata:** how often do you guys think about marching band

**Tsukishima:** literally never

**Kageyama:** every once in a while for some reason

**Yamaguchi:** ...never??

**Kenma:** everytime i see you in person, shouyou

**Oikawa:** same kenma

**Daichi:** i’m.. Not sure what that means

**Daichi:** pls elaborate??

**Hinata:** you don’t know what marching band is??

**Kageyama:** idiot he wasn’t talking to you

**Hinata:** maybe you should talk to me

**Kageyama:** ok. Do you wanna hang out?

**Hinata:** yes! Let me shower first!

**Sugawara:** LMAOO WHAT WAS THAT

**Oikawa:** um

**Oikawa:** anyway..

**Oikawa:** daichi, kenma and i have a joke that shouyou is literally the textbook definition of a band kid. I think kenma is the one who started it

**Kenma:** yeah it was me

**Oikawa:** and shouyou didn’t know what marching band was so Kenma showed him youtube videos of some american marching bands and he got way too into them

**Kenma:** he’s literally a freak about them

**Daichi:** ahhh ok ok makes more sense

**Nishinoya:** I LOVE MARCHING BAND

**Tanaka:** ME TOO

**Tanaka:** I MET A MARCHING BAND ONCE

**Nishinoya:** NO WAY

**Kenma:** can’t you two fucking band kid personality ass bitches go have this conversation somewhere else

**Nishinoya:** LMFAOOOO kuroo come get ur MAN 😳🤚🏻

**Kuroo:** i already have him

**Kuroo:** he is in my arms

**Kuroo:** 🥰🥰

**Sugawara:** need me a man like that

**Daichi:** SUGA???

**Daichi:** i’m RIGHT here

**Sugawara:** i know, i’m just bullying you bby 🥰😙

**Daichi:** 😙

**Tsukishima:** why… are you guys like this

-

Friday PM

_ Suga is a mom _

**Oikawa:** i have this really fun game idea you guys do you want to play it!!!

**Daichi:** no

**Sugawara:** no

**Tsukishima:** no

**Kenma:** no

**Iwaizumi:** no

**Oikawa:** so it’s called I ASK YOU A QUESTION AND YOU HAVE TO ANSWER

**Kenma:** what

**Kenma:** that sounds so stupid

**Kenma:** and we literally all said no

**Kenma** and  **Oikawa:**

**Oikawa:** kenma please just go along i have a plan

**Kenma:** not sure what that means but okay

_ Suga is a mom _

**Kenma:** i mean

**Kenma:** wow oikawa sounds amazing let’s play

**Oikawa:** OKAY! WHO WANTS TO GO FIRST?

**Kenma** and  **Oikawa:**

**Oikawa:** say shouyou

_ Suga is a mom: _

**Kenma:** shouyou you should go first

**Hinata:** OKAY

**Oikawa:** first question do you have a crush on anyone

**Hinata:** i guess

**Daichi:** ‘i guess’

**Oikawa:** SECOND QUESTION WHO WANTS TO ANSWER

**Sugawara:** kageyama!!!

**Kageyama:** why me

**Oikawa:** is your crush short

**Kageyama:** ..yes 

**Hinata:** who is it?

**Sugawara:** AREYOUKIDDINGMEHASFDKAJHSD

**Tsukishima:** wow suga

**Daichi:** WOW

**Oikawa:** ok the rules are i can only ask two people questions at the same time. So Hinata. Second question

**Iwaizumi:** how do you pull things like this out of your ass so well?

**Iwaizumi:** it’s kind of impressive

**Oikawa:** awww iwa-chan~~~~~~

**Iwaizumi:** stop i take it back

**Asahi** : was that supposed to be a compliment?

**Kuroo:** iwaizumi watch and learn

**Kuroo:** kenma you’re my entire world and i love you more than anything and i can’t imagine my life without you

**Kenma:** stop

**Sugawara:** LMAO

**Oikawa:** leave iwa-chan alone

**Oikawa:** he knows how to compliment me, he does it all the time

**Iwaizumi:** stop, i’m embarrassed

**Oikawa:** anyway! 

**Oikawa:** second question hinata: does your crush have blue eyes

**Hinata:** yes

**Kageyama:** who is it?? 

**Kageyama:** is it kiyoko

**Tanaka:** ummm kiyoko has gray eyes, kageyama.

**Tanaka:** don’t disrespect her

**Nishinoya:** YEAH

**Asahi:** how is that disrespecting her?

**Oikawa:** i don’t want to play this game anymore it isn’t as fun as i thought it would be

**Hinata:** lol kageyama it isn’t kiyoko

**Kageyama:** what other girl do you know with blue eyes?

**Kenma:** i don’t think i’ve ever wanted to hit someone more than i want to hit you kageyama

**Hinata:** none lol it’s you

**Nishinoya:** WHATWHATWAHT

**Yamaguchi:** WHY ARE YOU SAYING TIHS IN THE GROUPCHAT

**Hinata:** hahahaha

**Hinata:** ahahahahahah

**Hinata** removed  **Kageyama** from the chat

**Hinata:** ahahaha 

**Kenma:** hinata are you ok

**Hinata:** I DIDN’T MEAN TO SEND THAT HAHAHAHA

**Hinata:** ahahahahaha

**Oikawa:** I’M LITERALLY 

**Oikawa:** SCREAMING

**Kenma** added  **Kageyama** to the chat

**Kageyama:** you like me?

**Hinata:** yeah

**Kageyama:** oh

**Tsukishima** and  **Kageyama:**

**Tsukishima:** ARE YOU AN IDIOT

**Tsukishima:** SAY SOMETHING OTHER THAN ‘OH’

**Kageyama:** LIKE WHAT

**Tsukishima:** I DON’T KNOW. ANYTHING

_ Suga is a mom _

**Kageyama:** well i’m pretty sure i had a crush on you first, so.

**Hinata:** no you didn’t, stupid.

**Kenma:** are you

**Kenma:** are you kidding me

**Daichi:** guys…

**Sugawara:** why am I not surprised?

**Kageyama:** yeah, i’ve liked you since school started

**Hinata:** well i’m pretty sure I like you MORE than you like me

**Kageyama:** you don’t, so stop trying.

**Kuroo:** please stop

**Kuroo:** i’m begging you

**Kageyama:** hmm

**Kageyama:** hinata do you want to be my boyfriend?

**Iwaizumi:** and we get to see this for some reason

**Yamaguchi:** wtf

**Hinata:** YES

**Kageyama:** cool, so I asked you out. Which means I win.

**Hinata:** kageyama let’s break up

**Hinata:** kageyama do you want to be my boyfriend?

**Kageyama:** idiot i already won.

**Oikawa:** PLEASE STOP OH MY GOD

**Kageyama:** do you want to come over?

**Kageyama:** we can watch a movie

**Hinata:** okay!! ❤️

**Kageyama: ❤️**

**Kenma:** this is unbearable 

**Sugawara:** i think it’s cute


	17. Daisuga heavy because my big brain is full of them. Head empty, just Daisuga (and Bokuaka and Kuroken and Iwaoi)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: I wanna go to Karasuno
> 
> Tsukishima: No

**Hinata** has changed the group name to 😊

**Hinata:** hi handsome!!!!

**Kuroo:** hey

**Oikawa:** hi

**Tanaka:** HI!

**Hinata:** I’m talking to Kageyama!!

**Kageyama:** oh

**Kageyama:** hi :-)

**Hinata:** 😊

**Oikawa:** ew you guys are so cute

**Sugawara:** who would’ve thought we’d see the day that those two are dating

**Kenma:** I was scared it was never going to happen

**Tsukishima:** me too honestly

**Tsukishima:** It was horrible to watch

**Asahi:** Very embarrassing

**Sugawara:** But we all have to admit. It was cute to see Kageyama flustered.

**Sugawara:** so refreshing and pure 

**Kuroo:** that sounds so cute. 

**Kuroo:** I wanna go to Karasuno

**Tsukishima:** No

**Kuroo:** Why? Do you not love me?

**Tsukishima:** I don’t

**Tsukishima:** Now stay in Tokyo please

**Kenma:** lmaooooo

**Oikawa:** KURO HA

**Hinata:** Kageyama, are you busy?

**Kageyama:** Nope!

**Oikawa:** Why do you always make plans in the groupchat?

**Hinata:** Wanna come over?

**Kageyama:** Yes

**Oikawa:** Literally go somewhere elses like, idk, A PRIVATE CHAT

**Tsukishima:** They’re probably too nervous to text each other

**Kageyama:** Stop that

**-**

**Yamaguchi:** Guys look!

**Yamaguchi:** _ Attached image _

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki bought me flowers!

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi don’t embarrass me

**Yamaguchi:** Sorry but it’s so cute

**Oikawa:** Awww, what’s the occasion?

**Tsukishima:** I just saw them at the store and they reminded me of him

**Yamaguchi:** 🥰🥰🥰🥰

**Nishinoya:** I want flowers :(((

**Asahi:** You don’t even own a vase

**Asahi:** I bought you sunflowers, remember?

**Nishinoya:** Yes but the gesture is cute

**Asahi:** I’ll buy you something else ❤️

**Nishinoya:** Like a fish?

**Asahi:** Why a fish

**Nishinoya:** I want a betta fish so bad

**Nishinoya:** I’m just craving parenthood, you know?

**Kenma:** No

**Oikawa:** No

**Sugawara:** Yes

**Asahi:** No

**Asahi:** Noya, we have a cat. So I won’t be getting you a fish

**Nishinoya:** Asaaahiiiii pleaseeeee

**Asahi:** No

**Nishinoya:** You must not love me

**Nishinoya:** You must not TRUST me

**Asahi:** Why are you so dramatic

**Asahi:** Please stop

**Asahi:** you might over feed it

**Nishinoya:** YOU CAN OVERFEED A FISH???? WHAT???

**Asahi:** omg

**Daichi:** omg

**Tanaka:** OMG HAHA

**Kenma:** I’m glad I don’t have a fish

**Kenma:** I barely take care of myself, Kuro would do all the work

**Kenma:** Kuro buys me video games 😚

**Kuroo:** Anything for you, bbg

**Sugawara:** Daichi also buys me flowers! Or like, once he bought us matching shirts. And tea😌

**Sugawara:** and I pay him back in kisses

**Sugawara:** and other things 

**Kuroo:** other things like ass?

**Daichi:** Suga that was unnecessary

**Sugawara: 😋**

**Kuroo: “** other things” is definitely ass

**Sugawara: 😋**

**Daichi:** why

**Sugawara:** because I love you 

**Sugawara:** and I express that by paying you back in ass

**Daichi:** there are things that we don’t say because it will embarrass me

**Sugawara:** it’s cute when you’re embarrassed 😋

**Sugawara:** makes me feel powerful too😋

**Kuroo:** it’s not even that bad Daichi! Remember when I told two group chats that I ate Kenma’s ass

**Kenma:** That doesn’t mean everyone would want the groupchat to know when they eat ass

**Kuroo:** ass 😍😍 kenma come over

**Kenma:** you’re ugly

**Kenma:** I’m omw 

**Sugawara: 😋**

**-**

**Daichi:** _ attached image _

**Daichi:** he fell asleep

**Daichi:** reading 

**Daichi** : he’s just out here being cute

**Daichi:** how can someone be so cute

**Oikawa:** I’ve seen cuter

**Oikawa:** myself ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

**Oikawa:** right Iwa-Chan?

**Oikawa:** YOURE SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO ME PLEASE REPLY

**Iwaizumi:** let daichi have his moment 

**Oikawa:** wow okay

**Iwaizumi:** you’re cute dumbass

**Oikawa:** 🥰

**Daichi:** like look at him?? Who let him be this cute??? I’ve never seen someone as cute as suga and I want to die I love him so much

**Nishinoya:** SUGA!!! SO CUTE

**Tanaka:** Daichi just gets to see that everyday of his life and it’s unfair

**Asahi:** aww you guys are cute

**Yamaguchi:** I think Suga is the cutest on our team

**Daichi:** can’t argue there

**Tsukishima:** idk, yamaguchi is pretty cute

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI

**Tsukishima** left the group

**Yamaguchi** added  **Tsukishima** to the group

**Yamaguchi:** 💘💘💘💘💘

**Asahi:** I miss daichi and suga

**Daichi:** you saw us yesterday

**Asahi:** I miss Daichi and suga

**Asahi:** I think I know how you feel noya

**Nishinoya:** SEE


	18. I’m :-( so Oikawa is too

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: I must’ve read that wrong ha
> 
> Tsukishima: There’s your answer since you wanted to know so bad
> 
> Oikawa: THATS NOT TEA THATS FUCKED

**😊**

_ Friday PM _

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa isn’t fucking replying

**Kuroo:** Oh?

**Iwaizumi:** Has he texted anyone today?

**Kenma:** Not me

**Hinata:** Not me either

**Iwaizumi:** I just get worried about him sometimes

**Kageyama:** Is Oikawa okay?

**Iwaizumi:** Yeah, he should be

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll go to his place real quick

**Iwaizumi:** Talk to you later

**Iwaizumi** and  **Oikawa:**

**Iwaizumi:** Dumbass, are you gonna answer?

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t care

**Iwaizumi:** I’m almost at your place

**Oikawa:** okay

**Oikawa:** ❤️

**Iwaizumi:** Fucking finally

_ Wednesday AM _

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  **heart eyes**

**Hinata:** You're back!

**Oikawa:** 😊 I was in a bit of a funk

**Oikawa:** But Iwa-chan helped me out!

**Sugawara:** Are you alright?

**Oikawa:** It happens from time to time teehee

**Oikawa:** But my Iwa-chan nurses me back to health every time

**Oikawa:** He fixes it with love

**Iwaizumi:** More like cleans your room, gives you baths and feeds you

**Oikawa:** all of which you do because you love me so much

**Iwaizumi:** Yeah

**Oikawa:** He does love me omgomg

**Iwaizumi:** Idiot were you questioning it

**Kageyama:** I’m glad you’re okay Oikawa

**Oikawa:** I want to say something mean

**Oikawa:** But thank you Tobio

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Oikawa:** Just use emojis

**Asahi:** I like his smiley

-

**Hinata:** My sister has been on facetime with kageyama for an hour

**Hinata:** AN HOUR

**Hinata:** Like excuse me

**Yamaguchi:** How did that even start

**Hinata:** Well my phone was dead

**Hinata:** So while it was charging I called him on my laptop

**Kenma:** ew

**Hinata:** I know

**Hinata:** But anyways, Natsu came in my room and got distracted and said hi to Kageyama

**Hinata:** And then it went downhill from there and now she isn’t even IN MY ROOM ANYMORE SHE TOOK MY LAPTOP TO HER ROOM TO TALK TO MY BOYFRIEND

**Tsukishima:** lmao

**Hinata:** I think she has a crush on him too cause she gets all blushy when he comes over

**Hinata:** And she always wants to be in my room and she sits next to him and whenever we’re out she holds his hand before I can

**Hinata:** And he just lets her!!

**Tsukishima:** Soooo, you’re jealous of your sister?

**Oikawa:** AHAH OMGOMG SHOUYOU YOU ARE

**Kenma:** idiot

**Nishinoya:** Just like, imagine Shouyou and his sister competing for Kageyama’s attention

**Kenma:** a concept

**Oikawa:** OMG

**Oikawa:** And Tobio can’t say no to her because she’s little and cute and Hinata is just like sulking because he wants attention

**Hinata:** I shouldn’t have came here with my problems

**Sugawara:** It’s cute lol

**Nishinoya:** wOAH I JSUT THOUGHT OF SOMETHING SO WEIRD

**Nishinoya:** Have you and Kageyama kissed?

**Hinata:** not yet

**Nishinoya:** OMG ONE DAY THEY’RE GONNA KISS

**Nishinoya:** OMG CRAZY

**Daichi:** Noya, they’re dating

**Nishinoya:** YEAH BUT ITS KAGEYAMA AND HINATA

**Daichi:** Yeah but they’re dating

**Nishinoya:** How are you even gonna reach his lips

**Tanaka:** Your boyfriend is a giant what are you saying

**Hinata:** NOYA YOU ARE SHORTER THAN ME

**Nishinoya:** WHY DO YOU HAVE TO MAKE THIS ABOUT HEIGHT

**Kuroo:** These people exist

**Kuroo:** Like this is a real conversation

**Kuroo:** What is happening

**Kuroo:** Okay but wait

**Kuroo:** I’m curious, you haven’t kissed at all?

**Hinata:** I mean like, the cheek and like forehead and stuff

**Sugawara:** That is so cute omg Daichi come kiss my forehead

**Daichi:** omw

**Kuroo:** aw aw aw aw aw Kenma bring that forehead over here cutie

**Kenma:** I’m lazu, can’t you kiss it in the morning?

**Kuroo:** I mean I guess I’ll cry myself to sleep then

**Kuroo:** Since that’s what you want

**Kenma:** Chill

**Oikawa:** When are you guys gonna kiss?

**Hinata:** What? Should I know?

**Oikawa:** I mean, don’t you want to kiss him

**Hinata:** I don’t think I want to talk about this in a groupchat

**Oikawa:** We already started, it’s far too late

**Hinata:** He’s my boyfriend, isn’t it obvious I want to kiss him

**Oikawa:** THEN KISS HIM

**Hinata:** Stop

**Oikawa:** KISS HIM KISS HIM

**Kenma:** KISS HIM

**Nishinoya:** KISS HIM KISS HIM KISS HIM

**Hinata:** I WANT HIM TO KISS ME

**Hinata:** I’m too embarrassed

**Hinata:** And what if i do it wrong

**Kenma:** Its jsut a kiss. Ur not like making out with him

**Kenma:** Yet

**Nishinoya:** Omg one day they’re gonna make out

**Nishinoya:** omgomgomg 

**Daichi:** THEYRE DATING NOYA, THATS NORMAL

**Hinata:** But like, it’s my first kiss

**Hinata:** I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS

**Tsukishima:** Wow, Kageyama gets a special first kiss

**Oikawa:** YOU’VE NEVER BEEN KISSED BEFORE LOSER HAHA

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan was my first kiss

**Kenma:** That’s because you refuse to kiss anyone but him

**Oikawa:** I bet yours was Kuroo

**Kenma:** Yeah because that makes sense. We’ve known each other for years and we’re dating

**Kenma:** We’ve practically been dating since we were younger but we just didn’t know

**Kenma:** Imagine kissing someone other than kuro 🤢

**Kuroo:** Omg is it Kageyama’s first kiss

**Kageyama:** Why is this the convo i come back to

**Kageyama** left the group

**Kuroo** added  **Kageyama** to the group

**Kageyama** left the group

**Sugawara** added  **Kageyama to the group**

**Kageyama:** Sugawara

**Oikawa:** Is Hinata gonna be your first kiss?

**Kageyama:** Why do we always talk about these things in the groupchat

**Kageyama:** No, he’s not

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Kageyama:** I didn’t know it was important

**Kageyama:** I’m sorry

**Oikawa:** wow tea who was your first kiss?

**Kageyama:** Literally why is this so important, it’s just a kiss

**Oikawa:** Who was it

**Nishinoya:** Who was it

**Tanaka:** Who was it

**Kageyama:** FINE OMG IWAIZUMI

**Oikawa:** I must’ve read that wrong ha

**Tsukishima:** There’s your answer since you wanted to know so bad

**Oikawa:** THATS NOT TEA THATS FUCKED

**Oikawa:** I’m calling Iwaizumi

**Oikawa:** This cannot be real

**Hinata:** YOu GAVE YOUR FIRST KISS TO SOMEONE ELSE

**Kageyama:** It was an accident. And I didn’t even know you existed yet, it was so long ago

**Hinata:** soooo like, you just dont

**Hinata:** Care

**Hinata:** about

**Hinata:** me?

**Kageyama:** I never said that

**Iwaizumi:** omg why is this happening

**Oikawa:** You have some explaining to do

**Iwaizumi:** What more do you need to hear? He said it all, it was an accident, it happened forever ago and its JUST A KISS

**Oikawa:** How long ago?

**Iwaizumi:** Middle school

**Oikawa:** I WAS PINING FOR YOU AND YOU WERE OUT KISSING TOBIO 

**Oikawa:** I CANT BELIEVE YOU

**Hinata:** HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY KISS SOMEONE

**Sugawara:** Why are you two being so dramatic?

**Iwaizumi:** We just turned our heads at the wrong time

**Iwaizumi:** It’s not like we’re in love or anything

**Oikawa:** YOU MIGHT AS WELL BE

**Kuroo:** Kenma hasn’t stopped laughing omg

**Kuroo:** It was an accidental kiss lmao

**Sugawara:** Yeah guys, no need to make it a big deal

**Kageyama:** Thank you

**Hinata:** Put yourself in my shoes

**Sugawara:** You’re 🥰 dramatic 😋

**Hinata:** NO

**Hinata:** Kenma you see the problem RIGHT?!?!?!

**Kenma:** Shut up 😘

**Hinata:** YAMAGUCHI PLEASE

**Yamaguchi:** umm

**Yamaguchi:** Nishinoya was my first kiss so…

**Asahi:** oh yeah lmao forgot about that

**Hinata:** how did that even happen???

**Nishinoya:** yamaguchi said he hasn’t kissed anyone

**Nishinoya:** and I’ve kissed tons of people so like, why not!

**Hinata:** Tsukishima, how does that make you feel???

**Tsukishima:** I don’t care because it was just a small kiss and it was before we were dating

**Hinata:** no one understands me

**Hinata:** no one but Oikawa

**Kenma:** because you’re both idiots

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan cheated on me with TOBIO

**Oikawa:** I guess you like him more than me

**Iwaizumi:** don’t say I cheated on you. That isn’t what happened

**Iwaizumi:** you two are idiots omg

**Kenma:** are you surprised? 


	19. I’m still :-( so this time, suga is too

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: Daichi, the most handsome and sweet and hot wow what a sex god he’s such a gentleman and always knows how to make me smile, Sawamura helped me a lot 😚  
> Kuroo: 😚  
> Sugawara: That kiss was DAICHIS, KUROO 

**Yamaguchi** changed the group name to  _ head empty, just tsukki _

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki has not stopped laughing at goats in trees 🥺

**Tsukishima:** goats in trees goats in trees

**Yamaguchi:** He is the reason I breathe omg 

**Tanaka:** woah

**Tanaka:** wait goats can get in trees, what?

**Tsukishima:** of course they can what

**Yamaguchi:** They also can like

**Yamaguchi:** get on top of mountains?

**Tanaka:** HAHAHA WHY HAVE I NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT TJAT OMG

**Yamaguchi:** look up goats in trees it’s funny

**Kenma:** So that’s What Tsukishima finds funny

**Yamaguchi:** it’s cute

**Kageyama:** once, we were out and he stepped on my shoelace and it untied. So while I was going to tie it off to the side, he accidentally stepped on it again and I tripped.

**Kageyama:** he started laughing like 20 minutes after

**Yamaguchi:** 🥺🥺🥰🥰🥰

**Hinata:** when was that?

**Kageyama:** like last week? I think

**Daichi:** you guys hang out?

**Daichi:** like alone?

**Sugawara:** omg omg omgomg 

**Tsukishima:** ew no, I’d never hang out with that idiot ew

**Kageyama:** ew why would I spend my free time with him ew

**Kageyama:** we just bumped into each other and happened to be walking the same way

**Sugawara:** hm, I guess it would be a little weird if you guys were hanging out

**Hinata:** RIGHT

**Tsukishima:** stop screaming

**Hinata:** SHUT UP

**Tsukishima** and  **Kageyama:**

**Tsukishima:** you were almost more of an idiot

**Tsukishima:** nice cover though

**Kageyama:** I’m ready for every situation

_ head empty, just Tsukki _

**Yamaguchi:** you guys hung out yesterday

**Yamaguchi** : what are you talking about?

**Kuroo:** so are you friends or??

**Nishinoya:** OMG ARE YOU FRIENDS

**Oikawa:** Tobio has so many friends wtf

**Kageyama:** yes

**Tsukishima:** Tobio what

**Tsukishima:** you just told me that you’re “ready for every situation”

**Kageyama:** well I never prepared for your boyfriend ratting us out

**Hinata:** WAIT YOU GUYS ARE FRIENDS WHAT

**Hinata:** WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN

**Sugawara:** Aw that’s nice

**Kageyama:** like? The last year of high school?

**Tsukishima:** lol

**Hinata:** WHY DIDNT I KNOW

**Kageyama:** why is everyone so dramatic when they find out that I have a life

**Hinata:** so you think I’m annoying

**Kageyama:** when did I say that

**Hinata:** It was implied

**Kageyama:** It wasn’t

**Hinata:** so you want to break up?

**Kageyama:** no what

**Kageyama:** shut up

**Hinata: 💔💔💔**

**Oikawa:** you guys just do this

**Oikawa:** all the time?

**Sugawara:** yup!

**Tsukishima:** this is unnecessary

-

**Nishinoya:** just bought Minecraft for the switch😎

**Kenma:** epic

**Kuroo:** me and kenma play that together a lot

**Kuroo:** she’s therapeutic

**Asahi:** I thought you were gonna get it for Mac

**Nishinoya:** why?

**Asahi:** because I have a Mac

**Asahi:** we could have played together

**Nishinoya:** WHAT NO OMG I COMPLETELY FORGOT

**Kenma:** you play on Mac?

**Kuroo:** loser

**Kenma:** I hated playing on Mac

**Asahi:** I bought a mouse for it😊

**Asahi:** that and I don’t want to own like a dell or something

**Asahi:** I like the way macs look better idk

**Nishinoya:** guess you’ll have to come over so we can play together oops

**Asahi:** guess so oops

**Daichi:** I don’t mean to interrupt

**Daichi:** but suga is having a bad day

**Daichi:** so send him funny tik toks and cute emojis and just things he’d like

**Kageyama:** oh, I just sent him a tik tok

**Daichi:** thanks 😁

**Oikawa:** is suga okay?

**Daichi:** yeah he’s just feeling down today. I’m with him right now. I’m fixing it with forehead kisses and spicy food

**Daichi:** he has not left my side since this afternoon lol

**Kenma:** okay :( let us know when he’s better

**Daichi:** probably tomorrow! He’ll probably say something though

**Daichi:** we’re gonna take a nap so talk to you guys tomorrow!

-

**Sugawara:** I AM BACK

**Nishinoya:** SUGA WE MISSED YOUUUU

**Tanaka:** WE REALLY DID

**Sugawara:** I missed you guys too!

**Sugawara:** Daichi, the most handsome and sweet and hot wow what a sex god he’s such a gentleman and always knows how to make me smile, Sawamura helped me a lot 😚

**Kuroo:** 😚

**Sugawara:** That kiss was DAICHIS, KUROO 

**Daichi:** lol 😚

**Sugawara:** I want a real kiss 🥺

**Daichi:** I’m making your coffee lol give me three seconds

**Kenma:** Kuro thay could be us

**Kuroo:** OMWOMWOMWOMW

**Oikawa:** iwa-Chan 🥺🥺

**Iwaizumi:** just come back in the room loser ❤️


	20. Full plate, don't wait. Have you're cake and eat it... I CAN TAKE YOU OUT OH OH WE CAN KILL SOME TIME STAY HOME THROW BALLOONS TEDDY BEARS AND THE CHOCOLATE ECLAIRS AWAY GOT NOTHING BUT LOVE FOR YOU FALL MORE IN LOVE EVERYDAY. VALENTINE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima: Do they not know how to have personal conversations in a separate chat
> 
> Kenma: Good
> 
> Kenma: I live for this

_head empty, just tsukki_

**Hinata** removed **Kageyama** from the chat

 **Kenma:** Why though?

 **Hinata:** Don’t add him back yet!

 **Asahi:**??

 **Hinata:** Me and Natsu made him a cake!

 **Hinata:** _Attached image_

 **Hinata:** Do you think he’ll like it?

 **Sugawara:** Aww he’ll love it!

 **Hinata:** YAY

 **Kenma:** Cute but…It looks like the center is sinking?

 **Hinata:** Natsu thought she could shape it but it didn’t work out

 **Oikawa:** Please tell me Natsu iced it

 **Oikawa:** It’s so lumpy

 **Hinata:** haha… 

**Oikawa:** STFU HA

 **Oikawa:** HOW DID YOU MAKE IT SO BAD

 **Iwaizumi:** Shut up Oikawa

 **Iwaizumi:** I think he’ll love it

 **Hinata:** 😊 I’m gonna invite him over in a little

 **Kenma:** Kuro Kuro

 **Kuroo:** Yes yes

 **Kenma:** I want cake please

 **Kuroo:** Okay! I’ll be over soon

 **Oikawa:** I’ve been craving carrot cake 

**Sugawara:** okay grandma

 **Oikawa:** T^T Carrot is good

 **Kenma:** Yeah, if you’re 60

 **Iwaizumi:** I always buy a slice of carrot cake for him and hummingbird for me

 **Daichi:** I thought me and Suga were the old married couple

 **Sugawara:** Coffee cake 😍

 **Daichi:** Korean sponge cake 😍

 **Daichi:** omg suga’s coffee cake stop

 **Daichi:** I will kiss you 10 times if you make some

 **Sugawara:** Wanna go to the grocery store with me?

 **Daichi:** I’ll head over to your place

 **Iwaizumi:** Those two always make me feel lonely

 **Iwaizumi:** Are you busy Oikawa?

 **Oikawa:** Nope! I’m on my way 😚

 **Kenma:** Kuroooooo

 **Kenma:** My cake 🥺

 **Kuroo:** I’ll be over soon lol

-

 **Hinata** added **Kageyama** to the group

 **Hinata:** Update

 **Hinata:** He loves the cake!

 **Hinata:** _Attached image_

 **Tanaka:** That is so cute

 **Yamaguchi:** Kageyama is just out here

 **Yamaguchi:** Existing

 **Yamaguchi:** Looking so in love

 **Tanaka:** Looking so in love with frosting on his cheek like what

 **Tanaka:** so cute

 **Hinata:** It’s because Natsu’s feeding him lol

 **Kenma:** Update: Kuro made me cake

 **Kenma:** _Attached image_

 **Nishinoya:** Is that 😷 red velvet?! 🤢🤢

 **Kuroo:** Made with extra love bitch

 **Kenma:** Red velvet is superior

 **Nishinoya:** NO WAY!

 **Nishinoya:** Layered chocolate cake with chocolate frosting 🥵

 **Kenma:** Red velvet is just chocolate cake but it’s red

 **Nishinoya:** Don’t lie to me

 **Kenma:** I’m not

 **Nishinoya:** RED VELVET IS GARBAGE AND CHOCOLATE IS THE BEST

 **Kenma:** You’re a psychopath and cream cheese frosting is good

 **Oikawa:** Asahi that’s your boyfriend

 **Oikawa:** Don’t tell me you eat chocolate cake with him

 **Asahi:** I am numb

 **Sugawara:** Um

 **Tanaka:** Are you okay?

 **Asahi:** Numb

 **Nishinoya:** Asahi likes pies and tarts more than indulgent chocolate goodness

 **Sugawara:** oooh, well, next time I make a pie I’ll give you some!

 **Asahi:** Less numb

 **Oikawa:** Suga bakes a lot?

 **Daichi:** Yes and it’s the best!

 **Sugawara:** I’m just, the ideal wife 🥰

 **Tanaka:** Hear me out

 **Tanaka:** I marry Suga

 **Daichi:** Hear me out

 **Daichi:** No

 **Sugawara:** 😋

 **Hinata:** Update

 **Hinata:** Kageyama kissed me

 **Hinata:** AND HE WON’T STOP

 **Hinata:** HE’S JUST KEEPS KISSING ME AND LAUGHING

 **Hinata:** AND I’M SO EMBARRASSED 

**Nishinoya:** Tell him to stop?

 **Hinata:** I DON’T WANT HIM TO

 **Hinata:** WHY WOULD YOU SUGGEST THAT

 **Hinata:** He stopped

 **Hinata:** Because Natsu was pouting

 **Hinata:** So she’s feeding him his piece of cake again

-

 **Hinata:** oh MY GOD ME AND KAGEYAMA KISSED

 **Kageyama:** It’s 5am, go to sleep

 **Hinata:** WE KISSED

 **Kageyama:** Idiot, I know. I was there

 **Hinata:** WHAT DO WE DO?

 **Kageyama:** What are you talking about?

 **Hinata:** WE KISSED IDIOT WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO NOW

 **Kageyama:** Why are you being so dumb

 **Kageyama:** We’re dating, there’s no sequence you’re just being a dumbass

 **Hinata:** I NEED TO SLEEP 

**Kageyama:** Yeah, goodnight

 **Hinata:** Will you kiss me again tomorrow?

 **Kageyama:** Yes idiot. GO TO SLEEP

 **Kageyama:** ❤️

 **Hinata:** 💗

-

 **Kenma:** Waking up to messages like those 😍

 **Tsukishima:** Do they not know how to have personal conversations in a separate chat

 **Kenma:** Good

 **Kenma:** I live for this


	21. throat fucking and There are moments that the words don't reach There is suffering too terrible to name You hold your child as tight as you can And push away the unimaginable The moments when when you're in so deep It feels easier to just swim down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama: YOU WANT THE TRUTH
> 
> Hinata: YEAH
> 
> Kageyama: THE TRUTH IS THAT YOU’RE AN IDIOT

Monday PM

_head empty, just tsukki_

**Sugawara:** there are moments that the words don’t reach…

 **Daichi:**?

 **Asahi:** what

 **Sugawara:** there is suffering too terrible to name

 **Nishinoya:** what is this

 **Oikawa:** you hold your child as tight as you can

 **Oikawa:** and push away the unimaginable~

 **Kageyama:** it feels easier to just swim down

 **Sugawara:** THE HAMILTONS MOVE UPTOWN

 **Kuroo:** AND LEARN TO LIVE WITH THE UNIMAGINABLE

 **Daichi:** please stop with the hamilton

 **Kenma:** i’m going to say this just once

 **Kenma:** STOP getting kuro started with this

 **Kenma:** he’s going to be singing this for the next fucking week

 **Kuroo:** alexander come back to sleep…

 **Kenma:** stop

 **Kuroo:** it’s still dark outside

 **Kenma:** stop

 **Kuroo:** why do you write like you’re running out of time?

 **Oikawa:** WHY DO YOU WRITE LIKE YOU’RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME?

 **Hinata:** COME BACK TO SLEEPPP

 **Oikawa:** HINATA YOU KNOW HAMILTON?

 **Kenma:** lol

 **Kenma:** he called kuro a few weeks ago and learned it after kageyama said he knew it 

**Hinata:** shut UP KENMA

 **Sugawara:** it was june

 **Oikawa:** it’s september suga

 **Sugawara:** i was 10…

 **Sugawara:** i STILL THINK OF THAT DAY NOW AND THEN

 **Oikawa:** OBH

 **Sugawara:** A PARAAADEE

 **Sugawara:** AND A GIRL…

 **Asahi:** AND A CROWD OF THOUSANDS

 **Sugawara:** YES asahi

 **Sugawara:** she SAT STRAIGHT

 **Asahi:** AS A QUEEN

 **Sugawara:** ONLY 8 BUT SO PROUD AND SARINE 

**Sugawara:** scarine

 **Sugawara:** sareen ?

 **Daichi:** maybe not knowing how to spell the words is a sign to stop

 **Sugawara:** you’re so mean to me :(

 **Nishinoya:** suga what tf is your energy today

 **Kuroo:** bottom energy

 **Sugawara:** AHHHAHAHAH

 **Iwaizumi:** oikawa can relate

 **Oikawa:** hey.

 **Daichi:** we’re not doing this again

 **Sugawara:** on my own :(

 **Sugawara:** pretending he’s beside me :(

 **Sugawara:** all alone 😭

 **Sugawara:** i walk with him till morning :( 😭

 **Daichi:** suga i said to stop

 **Sugawara:** MAKE ME 

-

 **Nishinoya:** suga’s been real quiet since he sent that

 **Oikawa:** u know why 😼

**Kuroo: 😼😼**

**Sugawara:** u know why 🥰

 **Daichi:** stop

 **Asahi:** stop

 **Iwaizumi:** stop

 **Sugawara:** daichi why do you hate me when all i do is love you? :(:(:(

 **Daichi:** PLEASE 

**Daichi:** what do you want from me

 **Tanaka:** suga why do you have yuu energy today

 **Tanaka** changed the group name to _Spot the the difference between Yuu and Suga i bet you can’t_

 **Kageyama:** the the 

**Nishinoya:** HEY

**Sugawara: 😢🥺**

**Daichi: suga stop**

**Daichi:** you’re my soulmate and the best thing that’s ever happened to me and i wake up every single day significantly more happy than i can ever remember being and it’s all thanks to you. I love you more than anything and i can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you

 **Sugawara:** ahhhh yes finally

 **Sugawara:** thank you

 **Sugawara:** i can go to sleep peacefully now 🥰🥰

 **Kenma:** suga sometimes i can’t believe you’re real

Friday AM:

_Spot the the difference between Yuu and Suga i bet you can’t_

**Kuroo:** hey guys

 **Kuroo:** what are five things you like about me

 **Kuroo:** and don’t say my ass 😼

 **Oikawa:** no one was going to say your ass

 **Kuroo:** ok i get it. You hate me

 **Kenma:** well…

 **Kenma:** i don’t have five but i like that when i get in your car my bluetooth connects automatically 

**Kenma: 🥰**

**Kuroo:** i can list off five things you like about m **e**

 **Kuroo:** or five of your favorite things that i do to u 

**Kuroo: 😼**

**Kenma:** stop using that emoji

 **Kenma:** also you better not embarrass me or i’m breaking up with you

 **Oikawa:** LMAOOO

 **Tsukishima:** wow

 **Kuroo:** that’s an empty threat and u know it

 **Kenma:** no it isn’t

 **Kuroo:** u came over five minutes ago because u wanted to be cuddled

 **Kuroo:** and ur literally laying on my chest rn

 **Kuroo:** and i kissed ur cheek and u blushed

 **Kuroo:** empty threat

 **Sugawara:** empty chairs at empty tables

 **Daichi:** suga please

 **Oikawa:** oh so kenma is in LOVE 

**Hinata:** wbk wbk

 **Kenma:** leave me alone leave me alone leave me alone leave ME ALONE

**Kuroo:** _attached image_

**Oikawa:** AWWWWW

 **Hinata:** AWWW

 **Yamaguchi:** AWWWWW

 **Kenma:** STOP EMBARRASSINGF EM

 **Kuroo:** awww he’s blushing 🥰

**Kuroo:** _attached image_

**Sugawara:** AWWWWW

 **Daichi:** omg awwww

 **Kenma:** STOPPP

 **Kenma** has left the chat

-

**Saturday AM:**

_Spot the the difference between Yuu and Suga i bet you can’t_

**Hinata** changed the group name to _Kageyama is kind of annoying_

 **Kageyama:** fucking idiot

 **Kageyama** changed the group name to _why is Hinata even in this groupchat he’s so annoying_

**Hinata** _changed the group name to_ **_I’m the one who made it dumbass_ **

**Kageyama** changed the group name to _well I don’t think you should be in this because you’re too annoying_

 **Daichi:** ok guys that’s enough

 **Hinata** changed the group name to _it’s fine kageyama you can just leave if you can’t deal with me_

 **Kageyama** changed the group name to _why are you literally being such an idiot i hate you so much_

 **Kuroo:** trouble in paradise already?

 **Oikawa:** it’s a little early for a break-up argument don’t you think?

 **Kageyama:** no omg i’d never break up with him

 **Hinata:** yeah kageyama why don’t you just tell them the TRUTH

 **Sugawara:** what is going on omg

 **Kageyama:** YOU WANT THE TRUTH

 **Hinata:** YEAH

 **Kageyama:** THE TRUTH IS THAT YOU’RE AN IDIOT

 **Kenma:** it is saturday morning

 **Kenma:** i was sleeping

 **Kenma:** what’s happening

 **Kenma:** kuro i’m so tired

 **Kuroo:** my heart is so full my heart is so full you’re so cute you’re so cute

 **Kenma:** i’d be cuter if you were cuddling me

 **Kuroo:** SORRY BBG I WAS IN THE KITCHEN I’LL BE RIGHT THERE

 **Oikawa:** why did the two idiots go quiet

 **Tsukishima:** because hinata is an idiot

 **Yamaguchi:** yeah

 **Hinata:** OH SO YOU GUYS ARE ON KAGEYAMA’S SIDE

 **Oikawa:** GOD WHAT IS THIS ABOUT

 **Kageyama:** hinata IS JUST BEING ANNOYING TODAY

 **Kageyama:** I WOKE UP TO 20 TEXT MESSAGES FROM HIM

 **Kageyama:** TALKING ABOUT HOW HE ATE A SANDWICH AND ALL HE COULD SMELL WAS BREAD

 **Kageyama:** ‘it’s so distracting it’s distracting me so much’

 **Kageyama:** ‘the smell of bread is everywhere’

 **Kageyama:** ‘and it kind of smells bad but i guess i can’t taste the smell’

 **Kageyama:** ‘hey kageyama if you smell something and it’s strong enough can you taste it’

 **Kageyama:** ‘that’s how i feel with this bread except i can’t taste it’

 **Kageyama:** ‘like this sandwich is good but i just wish i couldn’t smell the bread’

 **Kageyama:** ‘but i guess if it’s right next to my nose then it just makes sense doesn’t it’

 **Kageyama:** ‘hey kageyama you remind me of this sandwich’

 **Kageyama:** ‘not like you smell bad and taste good but more like you’re put off of it at first but then it’s actually pretty nice’

 **Iwaizumi:** ok ok we don’t need the 20 messages

 **Kageyama:** YOU GUYS DON’T UNDERSTAND

 **Oikawa:** I THINK WE DO

 **Kenma:** I’ve been friends with shouyou since we were kids i think i do understand 

**Kenma:** sometimes he’s just extra chaotic

 **Kuroo:** so are you

 **Iwaizumi:** so is oikawa

 **Kuroo:** oh god their entire little friend group has chaotic energy 

**Kenma:** i’m not sure what that’s supposed to mean because i’m never chaotic but ok

 **Hinata:** lol guys

 **Hinata:** please 

**Kageyama:** please what

 **Hinata:** please

 **Kageyama:** i hate you so much

 **Sugawara:** wow this is so cute

 **Daichi:** no. it’s just annoying

 **Sugawara:** well i think it’s cute

 **Tsukishima:** ur the only one

 **Sugawara:** WOW

**-**

**Saturday PM:**

_Why are you literally being such an idiot i hate you so much_

**Kenma:** i’m not real today

 **Oikawa:** what does that mean

 **Kuroo:** it means he’s not real today

 **Sugawara:** it means he isn’t real today

 **Oikawa:** ??? can i have context

 **Kenma:** no

 **Kenma:** because i’m not real

 **Oikawa:** ????

**Saturday PM:**

_Why are you literally being such an idiot i hate you so much_

**Kenma:** do you guys ever like l;ki0p[9 08bvguoi

 **Kenma:** concentrate so hard on something and you don’t realize you’re holding your breath and then you start getting lightheaded and then you start freaking out because you feel like you’re gonna pass out and then you just remember that you need to breathe?

 **Oikawa:** why did you start it with ‘do you guys ever’ when you know that you just have very specific issues

 **Hinata:** it’s ok kenma i do that too

 **Kuroo:** that doesn’t count

 **Kuroo:** you guys share one brain cell

 **Kenma:** what is that supposed to mean

 **Oikawa:** LMAOO

 **Tanaka** changed the group name to _hinata and kenma are two halves of a whole idiot_

 **Kuroo:** i don’t think u can talk

 **Kuroo:** you and nishinoya are the same

 **Kenma:** oh so now he’s defending me

 **Nishinoya:** when only ur allowed to be mean to ur man 😻😻 i get it i get it

 **Asahi:** when have you ever been mean to me

 **Tsukishima:** and now he’s quiet

 **Tsukishima:** wow

-

Sunday AM:

_hinata and kenma are two halves of a whole idiot_

**Hinata:** guys guys guys

 **Hinata:** i made a new friend today!

 **Hinata** added **Lev Haiba** to the chat

 **Lev:** hi gus!!!!

 **Lev:** *guys!!!!!

 **Kenma:** NOOOO

 **Lev:** KENMA!!!

 **Kuroo:** LEVVVV!!

 **Lev:** KUROO!!!!

 **Kenma** removed **Lev** from the chat

 **Kuroo:** kenma why :(((

 **Hinata:** kenma why :((

Sunday PM

_Hinata and kenma are two halves of a whole idiot_

**Sugawara:** throat fucking 😍

 **Oikawa:** WHAT

 **Nishinoya:** AHHHH WHAT

 **Kuroo:** 😍 throat fucking 🥵

 **Kenma:** no

 **Kenma:** don’t participate in this i’ll kill you

 **Yamaguchi:** throat fucking 😫

 **Tsukishima:** we’re breaking up

 **Oikawa:** um

 **Oikawa:** let’s not talk about this?

 **Iwaizumi:** why?

 **Iwaizumi:** you always seem so passionate about this when we’re alone.

 **Nishinoya:** AHHHH OH MY GODF

 **Oikawa** has left the chat

 **Kageyama:** i didn’t need to know this about you guys

 **Kageyama** added **Oikawa** to the chat

 **Kageyama:** you can’t leave

 **Kageyama:** not now

 **Sugawara:** when he pulls your hair 😍🥰

 **Daichi:** suga

 **Daichi:** kageyama and hinata are in this chat

 **Sugawara:** and??? 

**Kuroo:** when he scratches your back just so much 🤪😩

 **Oikawa:** stop i’m embarrassed for you guys

 **Oikawa:** why are you so open about this

 **Hinata:** i’m surprised you aren’t tooru

 **Oikawa:** WELL

 **Oikawa:** IT’S EMBARRASSING

 **Iwaizumi:** no it isn’t, you’re just stupid

 **Oikawa:** iwa-chan 😭

 **Kenma:** i want to expose shouyou

 **Kuroo:** you can’t expose him when you haven’t participated

 **Kenma:** when he eats ur ass 🥰

 **Kenma:** when he pulls ur hair 😍

 **Kuroo:** omg

 **Sugawara:** AHAHAHA

 **Oikawa:** KENMA STOP I DON’T NEED THESE MENTAL IMAGES

 **Kenma:** anyway i want to expose shouyou

 **Kuroo:** do it

 **Sugawara:** do it

 **Hinata:** what

 **Hinata:** stop

 **Kenma:** when he has a praise kink 😈💅🏼✌🏼

 **Sugawara:** omg omg ahahah omg

 **Tanaka:** HAHAHA HINATA

 **Nishinoya:** awwww asahi u and shouyou are twins 

**Asahi:** stop

 **Asahi:** i’m so embarrassed yuu shut up

 **Hinata:** why would you tell them that kenma

 **Hinata:** why

 **Tanaka:** omg shouyou

 **Tanaka:** nice job at practice today 🥰🥰

 **Sugawara:** hinata you did so good 🥵

 **Daichi:** GUYS lol don’t bully him 

**Sugawara:** you say that but you haven’t stopped laughing for like ten minutes

 **Kuroo:** NEITHER HAS KENMA LOL

 **Nishinoya:** i’m abt to tease asahi about this so brb i’m gonna go get some 6’14 dick 😈

 **Sugawara:** that isn’t a height

 **Daichi:** that’s what u have a problem w?

 **Daichi:** is the height

 **Sugawara:** yeah

 **Tanaka:** kageyama has been real silent

 **Kuroo:** KAGEYAMA

 **Kageyama** has left the chat

 **Oikawa:** excuse me

 **Oikawa:** if I have to be embarrassed so do you tobio

 **Oikawa** has added **Kageyama** to the chat

 **Sugawara:** kageyama let's talk about you for a second

 **Kageyama:** i’d rather not

 **Kuroo:** i bet my man likes to be choked

 **Kuroo:** kageyama i’ll choke you 😍

 **Kenma:** kuro stop bullying him

 **Kuroo:** KENMA YOU STARTED THIS

 **Kenma:** actually sugawara started this

 **Sugawara:** what can i say? I love chaos 😍✨

 **Oikawa:** i hate you

 **Iwaizumi:** why do you guys love to embarrass tobio and hinata

 **Kenma:** personally it’s a hobby of mine

 **Sugawara:** it’s my job

 **Kenma:** and i think it’s unfair that kuroo gets to embarrass me but no one ever embarrasses shouyou

 **Oikawa:** shouyou embarrasses himself 

**Kenma:** true

 **Hinata:** HEY

 **Kageyama:** he’s right

 **Sugawara:** oh good kageyama you’re back

 **Sugawara:** are you ready to share with the group?🙂

 **Kageyama** has left the chat

 **Hinata** has left the chat

 **Oikawa:** can we stop now

 **Oikawa:** let’s go back to talking about hamilton

 **Sugawara:** i SAVED EVERY LETTER YOU WROTE ME, FROM THE MOMENT I READ THEM I KNEW YOU WERE MINE

 **Daichi** has left the chat

 **Sugawara:** you said you were mine, i thought u were mine :(((

 **Kenma:** suga your attention span lately is inspiring 

**Kuroo:** DO YOU KNOW WHAT ANGELICA SAID WHEN SHE SAW YOUR FIRST LETTER ARRIVE?

 **Kenma** has removed **Sugawara** and **Kuroo** from the chat

 **Tsukishima:** finally some peace and quiet


	22. hinata misses kenma it's me i'm hinata and it's u ur kenma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: ORANGE BITCH AND PRETTY BOY BITCH STOLE MY BOYFRIEND
> 
> Oikawa: love that i’m pretty boy bitch ✨

Saturday AM

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ operation 39238 _

**Hinata:** YES

**Daichi:** what

**Daichi:** what does that mean?

**Sugawara:** why are you asking if you know they won’t tell you?

**Kageyama:** better not to interact

**Iwaizumi:** exactly

**Iwaizumi:** they’re in their own weird ass world

**Oikawa:** mean iwa-chan~~

**Iwaizumi:** stop

**Oikawa:** shouyou i have something to ask you

**Hinata:** yes tooru?

**Daichi:** what are you two doing? 

**Daichi:** whatever it is, stop.

**Oikawa:** shouyou, are you busy next weekend?

**Hinata:** why, no, tooru, i’m not!

**Oikawa:** excellent~

**Hinata:** excellent INDEED TOORU

**Kuroo:** why are you two here

**Kuroo:** making plans like that in front of us

**Asahi:** hey that’s my line

**Kuroo:** well u snooze u lose i guess

**Kuroo:** kenma where are you i miss you so much

**Kuroo:** kenmaaaaa

**Kuroo:** KENMA KENMA KENMAAAA

**Kuroo:** babyyyyy

**Kuroo:** KENMA BABBYYYYYYYY

**Tsukishima:** spamming the fucking groupchat isn’tg going to make hgim answer

**Kuroo:** it might

**Kuroo:** and don’t come at me if u can’t even type

**Kuroo:** ur typos are making me miss kenma even more :( 

**Kuroo:** kenma baby i’m crying i’m shaking i miss you so much

**Tanaka:** lol yuu he’s worse than you

**Nishinoya:** oh god

**Asahi:** i didn’t think anyone was worse than u 

**Asahi:** and i mean that in the best way <3

**Nishinoya:** AWWWW ASAHI I’M COMING OVER RN

**Asahi:** i can’t wait!!!❤️

**Kuroo:** why did you just make plans like that RIGHT iN FRONt oF ME

**Kuroo:** mny SOUlKMATE isn’t HERE HE;S ABANDONED ME

**Kuroo:** AND YOU’RE FLAUNTING???

**Kuroo:** SHOWING OFF????

**Tsukishima:** Oh, kuroo, sorry for the typos. Yamaguchi is asleep on my chest and it’s kind of awkward to type.

**Tsukishima:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** YESSS TSUKISHIMA SHOW OFF YOUR MAN

**Kuroo:** WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME

**Kuroo:** KENMA PLEASE

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Iwaizumi:** _ attached image _

**Iwaizumi:** teehee

**Kuroo:** YOU TOO?

**Kuroo:** NOO STOP 

**Kageyama:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** KAGEYAMA I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY MAN…

**Kuroo:** WHY DID YOU GO AGAINST ME LIKE THIS?

**Kageyama:** lol

**Kuroo:** just want to hold him i’m screaming i’m shaking i’m sobbing

**Iwaizumi:** don’t you literally live right next to him?

**Iwaizumi:** why don’t you go to his house..

**Kuroo:** iwaizumi 

**Kuroo:** iwaizumi iwaizumi 🙏🏻

**Kuroo:** ur a genuis.

**Sugawara:** i don’t think it takes a genius to think of such a simple solution, but okay.

**Daichi:** HAHA SUGA

-

**Oikawa:** do we get an update on kenma?

**Oikawa:** kuroo is silent

**Oikawa:** i think i’m worried

**Sugawara:** now that you mention it

**Sugawara:** kuroo did you die?

**Sugawara:** i kind of hope not. That’d be traumatic

**Kageyama:** kind of?

**Nishinoya:** maybe he’s bow-chicka-wow-wow

**Nishinoya:** i know i was 🤤

**Tsukishima:** thanks for sharing i guess

**Sugawara:** HAHAHA

**Daichi:** it’s beene 20 minutes can you guys calm down

**Hinata:** beene

**Daichi:** thanks

**-**

**Sugawara:** okay kuroo it’s been like an hour

**Sugawara:** i KNOW neither of you can last that long

**Daichi:** suga!

**Sugawara:** WHAT?

**Sugawara:** i want an update! 

**Sugawara:** kuroo died!

-

**Kuroo:** wtf

**Oikawa:** KUROO!

**Oikawa:** where’s kenma

**Kuroo:** sleeping

**Oikawa:** ??????

**Kuroo:** this idiot

**Kuroo:** WENT OUTSIDE

**Kuroo:** ‘u told me to go outside more, kuro’

**Kuroo:** WELL kenma i didn’t MEAN TO GO OUTSIDE and SIT OUT THERE GAMING

**Kuroo:** AND THEN FALL ASLEEP

**Kuroo:** IN THE SUN

**Sugawara:** oh no

**Kuroo:** I WOKE HIM UP AND MADE HIM DRINK WATER AND HE THREW IT UP EVERYWHERE

**Daichi:** oh god

**Oikawa:** oh my god is he okay???

**Kuroo:** he’s alright, i gave him a cold bath and gave him more water and put him to bed 😌

**Kuroo:** my job is to take CARE OF MY MAN

**Kuroo:** bc he can’t do it himself apparently

**Kuroo:** BUT THAT’S OK BECAUSE I’M HERE

**Kuroo:** yes i do the cooking yes i do the cleaning

**Oikawa:** i hate you

**Oikawa:** stop

**Kuroo:** oikawa… why r u talking to me like this… 😦

**Hinata:** use the one with the eyebrows 

**Kuroo:** oikawa… why r u talking to me like this… 😧

**Hinata:** thanks

**Kageyama:** idiot

**Sugawara:** Is he sunburnt really bad?

**Kuroo:** yeah

**Sugawara:** was he NOT wearing sunscreen?

**Kuroo:** kenma doesn’t go outside

**Kuroo:** i don’t think he even thought about sunscreen

**Sugawara:** wake him up and put him on the phone with me RIGHT NOW I SWEAR!!!

**Kuroo:** daichi come get ur man 😳 🤚🏻

**Nishinoya:** mommy suga 🥰😍

**Kuroo:** anyway

**Kuroo:** i’m gonna go hold my poor bby kenma 😭🥰

**Oikawa:** can’t u say cuddle like a normal person

**Kuroo:** no 😼✨

**Oikawa:** god just leave already

**Kuroo:** WOW

**Sugawara:** LMAO

-

_ operation 39238 _

**Kenma:** lol when he becomes ur housewife

**Oikawa:** KENMA I MISSED YOU!

**Hinata:** KENMA!

**Kenma:** shouyou!

**Hinata:** KENMA!

**Kenma:** shouyou!

**Oikawa:** i’m right here

**Kenma:** shouyou!

**Sugawara:** HAHAHA

**Sugawara:** kenma. I’m mad at you.

**Kenma:** yeah, i know, kuro told me

**Kenma:** sorry i fell asleep outside i guess the heat made me tired

**Sugawara:** THAT’S WHAT YOU’RE APOLOGIZING FOR?

**Kenma:** yeah

**Kuroo:** that’s the best ur gonna get i’ve already tried 

**Kuroo:** stubborn ass

**Kenma:** thought u liked my stubborn ass?

**Oikawa:** i

**Oikawa:** i think the heat is still affecting him

**Oikawa:** kenma doesn’t talk like this

**Kuroo:** yes he does just not in the groupchat

**Hinata:** u’ve never heard kenma talk like that?

**Oikawa:** no??

**Hinata:** lol

**Kuroo:** lol

**Oikawa:** STOP I HATE THIS

**Kenma:** is baby tooru sad? Is he not being included?🥺💔

**Oikawa:** KENMA???

**Nishinoya:** LMAO KUROO COME GET YOUR MAN

**Kuroo:** HE WON’T STOP

**Kuroo:** HE’S BEEN DOING IT TO ME ALL MORNING

**Kuroo:** except i tried to leave the room to sulk and he attached onto me like a freak

**Kenma:** my only personality trait is being a leech 😍

**Kenma:** stuck on u 😍❤️🥵

**Nishinoya:** lol kenma that emoji was u yesterday 🥵

**Nishinoya:** when u fall asleep outside bc ur gaming and the heat makes u tired 🥵

**Kenma** has removed  **Nishinoya** from the chat

**Sugawara:** remember when kenma was like i’m not real today

**Sugawara:** i think this is what he meant

**Kuroo:** this is exactly what he meant when he said that

**Kenma:** kuro come back i miss ur kisses 🥺😢

**Kuroo:** I LITERALLY LEFT TO GET A GLASS OF WATER

**Kuroo:** but lol omw!!!😳

**Oikawa:** kuroo treated him like a whole ass prince for one night and now he’s like this

**Kuroo:** i treat my man like a prince everyday wym 🥰🤚🏻

**Asahi:** i think i hate this groupchat

**Kenma:** you think?

**Kenma:** lol

**Hinata:** kenma stop 😭

**Kenma:** make me kuro

**Sugawara:** he’s not

**Sugawara:** wait

**Sugawara:** i see what ur doing

**Kuroo:** yes sir **😼💅🏼**

**Oikawa:** ah, yes, two emojis that shouldn’t ever be used together

-

Friday PM

_ operation 39238 _

**Oikawa:** shouyou!

**Oikawa:** it’s friday!

**Hinata:** YES YES YES

**Kuroo:** what does that mean

**Sugawara:** idk i’ve been trying to get it out of them all week

**Kageyama:** lol…

**Kuroo:** YOU KNOW?

**Iwaizumi:** i know, too.

**Kuroo:** WHAT?

**Kuroo:** WHY DON’T I KNOW?

**Daichi:** my guess is that… shocking, i know, but u aren’t dating one of them

**Kuroo:** kageyama WE’RE practically dating! You can tell me right!

**Kenma:** kuro.

**Hinata:** kageyama don’t answer

**Kageyama:** lol

**Kageyama:** hey hinata 

**Kageyama:** please

**Daichi:** what

**Sugawara:** what does that mean

**Hinata:** ok!

**Sugawara:** what

**Hinata:** it means he wants a kiss 

**Tsukishima:** he can’t just ask?

**Kageyama:** shut up kei

**Sugawara:** he can’t just ask?

**Daichi:** suga u don’t even ask if you want a kiss

**Daichi:** you just pout and stare at me

**Sugawara:** we’re talking about kageyama, not me.

**Kageyama:** lol

**Hinata:** kageyama come outside

**Daichi:** wtf

**Daichi:** did you run to his house just to kiss him?

**Hinata:** no….

**Hinata:** he’s part of operation 39238..

**Tsukishima:** there’s no way that’s a real thing

**Tsukishima:** i think oikawa just keyboard smashed that number.

**Oikawa:** so what if i did?

**Iwaizumi:** why are you on your phone?

**Iwaizumi:** you’re driving

**Oikawa:** We’re stopped, Hajime.

**Nishinoya:** woah… pullin out names are we?😳🤚🏻

**Iwaizumi:** still.

**Hinata:** can we go? Everyone’s in the car

**Daichi:** what is going ON

**Sugawara:** LITERALLY

**Kuroo:** io’m crying please jus tell me 

**Kageyama:** lol

**-**

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  _ EXCUSE ME? _

**Sugawara:** …. You’re excused?

**Kenma:** you’re excused, kuro.

**Kuroo:** you couldn’t even take me with you?😭

**Hinata:** there was no room in the car!

**Hinata:** and where would you even stay?

**Kuroo:** WITH KENMA…

**Kenma:** kuro, it’s one weekend

**Asahi:** what’s going on

**Asahi:** please explain

**Kuroo:** I WAS 

**Kuroo:** SPENDING MY FRIDAY AS I NORMALLY DO

**Kuroo:** CUDDLING KENMA

**Kuroo:** PLAYING WITH HIS CUTE HAIR

**Kuroo:** SQUEEZIN HIS CUTE ASS

**Kuroo:** AND HINATA TEXTS HIM AND GOES 

**Kuroo: ‘** COME OUTSIDE’

**Kuroo:** AND THIS ORANGE MF STOLE MY BOYFRIEND FOR THE WEEKEND!

**Kuroo:** ORANGE BITCH AND PRETTY BOY BITCH STOLE MY BOYFRIEND

**Oikawa:** love that i’m pretty boy bitch ✨

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru, you’re driving.

**Oikawa:** Hajime.

**Oikawa:** We are literally parked at the moment.

**Kageyama:** you two stop it

**Kuroo:** DO YOU HAVE NO SHAME?

**Kuroo:** WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITHOUT HIM?

**Kenma:** stop being clingy

**Kenma:** it’s for two nights.

**Kuroo:** TWO NIGHTS I WON’T GET TO SPEND WITH YOU.

**Oikawa:** it’s fine kuroo we can keep him longer~

**Kuroo: 😭**

**Nishinoya:** it’s ok kuroo u can just u know

**Kuroo:** what

**Nishinoya:** ooooooo what a time to b aliveee livin in the picture blingin on my hotline 

**Kuroo:** .. what

**Nishinoya:** i wanan get freaky on camera i love when we get freaky on camera✨

**Nishinoya:** can’t give head you give me the facetime 😍

**Kuroo:** hmm i think i know what you mean

**Kenma:** kuro i will not answer your calls if you do that

**Kuroo:** kenma 😭

**Hinata:** anyway..

**Hinata:** I GET TO HANG OUT WITH KENMA FOR THE WEEKEND

**Hinata:** I’VE MISSED HIM SO MUCH

**Hinata:** KENMA!!!

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU!!!!

**Hinata:** KENMA!!!

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU!!!!

**Kenma:** i’m literally so excited 

**Kenma:** :)

**Kuroo:** omg…

**Kuroo:** kenma you’re so cute

**Kuroo:** ur happy texting

**Kuroo:** ok ok ok ok i[‘m willing ot have a lonely weekend if it means ur this happe

**Sugawara:** what’s w all the typos

**Kuroo:** sorry i’m crying i miss him so much

**Kenma:** i hate you so much sometimes

-

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** so cute!!! You all look so happy!!!

**Oikawa:** I’VE MISSED THEM

**Hinata:** I’VE MISSED YOU GUYS MORE

**Kenma:** SHUT UP I’VE MISSED YOU GUYS MORE

**Sugawara:** SHUT UP LMAO

**-**

**Oikawa:** i know it’s 1am but

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** kenma still called kuroo so the two of them could fall asleep together lolol

**Sugawara:** that’s so cute lol

**Sugawara:** can they stop being so in love

**Sugawara:** it’s disgusting to see

**Daichi:** ur literally in love w me and u do the same thing??

**Sugawara:** yeah but we’re the superior and cutest couple in this groupchat and i don’t need kenma and kuroo dethroning us

**Daichi:** you’re so dramatic

**Sugawara:** you’re mean and i hate you.

**Daichi:** i guess i’ll get out of ur bed then…

**Sugawara:** stop!! No!! 

**Daichi:** lol

-

**Hinata:** _ attached image  _

**Hinata:** day two!!!!

**Sugawara:** are you going to just send us pictures this entire weekend?

**Hinata:** yes

**Sugawara:** ok

**Sugawara:** good

**Sugawara:** they’re cute so keep them coming


	23. i do i do i do eliza i do i do i do i never felt so helpless yeahhh my life is goin fine cuz elizas in it i look into ur eyes and the skys the limit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: sorry kitten ❤️ please forgive me
> 
> Asahi: Wow you’re really trying to work it today.
> 
> Kenma: stop
> 
> Kenma: i’m going to kick you out

**Kenma:** i’m back from shouyou’s

**Kenma:** and i think my foot is broken

**Kenma:** from walking on it so much

**Kuroo:** want me to kiss it better?

**Kenma:** you’re a fucking freak 

**Kuroo:** ur right that one was a little weird even for me

**Tanaka** changed the group name to  _ no foot fetishes here _ 🤚🏻🤢🚫❌🦶🏻

**Kuroo:** omg

**Kuroo:** i didn’t know there was a foot emoji

**Nishinoya:** storing that information away for later, are we?

**Kuroo:** NOOO STOP

**Kenma:** kuro if you make these assholes think i’m dating someone with a fucking foot fetish i’ll never forgive you

**Kuroo:** I DON’T LIKE FEET I SWEAR

**Sugawara:** Hmmm…

**Sugawara:** Sure…

**Kuroo:** i’m shaking i’m crying

**Kenma:** kuro come carry me up the stairs

**Kuroo:** on my way!!

**Tanaka:** on his way to kiss his feet

**Kenma:** as if i’d ever allow him to go near me like that

**Tanaka:** suuuuuure

**Nishinoya:** i guess kenma has a foot fetish too then

**Kenma:** i really hate you guys

-

_ no foot fetishes here🤚🏻🤢🚫❌🦶🏻 _

**Asahi:** Ew, this group name.

**Asahi** changed the group name to  _ stop talking about weird shit when i’m trying to sleep _

**Asahi:** Anyway.

**Asahi:** So

**Asahi:** Guys

**Asahi: ✋🤚**

**Asahi:** Put a finger down if you downloaded a french keyboard just because and then deleted it because it’s annoying and you never use it but your phone still autocorrects the most random spelling errors to random french words!

**Asahi:** 🤟🤚

**Asahi:** There’s not an emoji with just one finger down..

**Asahi:** But hahaha just me?

**Sugawara:** Yeah it’s just you, i still have ten fingers up

**Sugawara: ✋🤚**

**Daichi: ✋🤚**

**Kuroo: ✋🤚**

**Oikawa: ✋🤚**

**Nishinoya:** is that why you send me random shit like that

**Asahi:** Oui, mon amour. 

**Nishinoya:** ooooooh hot

**Nishinoya:** speak french to me on your accidental keyboard daddy 😍😍😍

**Daichi:** alright that’s enough get this out of the chat

**Nishinoya:** oh okay so kuroo can say he wants to kiss kenma’s broken foot but i can’t show the world that i love my MAN?

**Nishinoya:** MY MULTILINGUAL KING?

**Daichi:** first off i’m not sure that’s what kuroo meant

**Daichi:** sexond we don’t need to see u calling asahi daddy everyday 

**Sugawara:** sexond hm 😍🥴 daddy u got me acting up w that typo

**Daichi:** what is wrong with you all today 

**Sugawara:** i was joking but

**Sugawara:** come over tho?

**Sugawara:** 😋😋

**Daichi:** ok !

**Hinata:** i think i’m uncomfortable 

**Oikawa:** me too shouyou

**Nishinoya:** SO IT’S OK WHEN SUGA DOES IT???

**Kuroo:** SO WHEN SUGA DOES THIS

**Kuroo:** HE DOESN’T GET MADE FUN OF

**Tanaka:** suga doesn’t want to lick daichi’s feet

**Kuroo:** WHEN DI DI SAY THAT I WANT TO LICK KENMA’S FEET

**Tanaka:** ok sorry

**Tanaka:** suga didn’t say he wants to deepthroat daichi’s toes

**Kenma** has left the chat

**Kuroo** has left the chat

**Nishinoya** has left the chat

**Sugawara:** lol

**Asahi:** Why can’t you guys just act normal?

**-**

_ stop talking about weird shit when i’m trying to sleep _

**Kuroo:** kenma

**Kuroo:** kenmaaa

**Iwaizumi:** can’t you do this in a private chat

**Kuroo:** kenmaaaa

**Kuroo:** babyyyy

**Kuroo:** babbbyyyyyy

**Kenma:** don’t call me baby in the groupchat

**Kenma:** it’s weird

**Kuroo:** should i call u kitten instead? 🙂

**Kenma:** s

**Kenma:** sotp

**Kenma:** what tdf do you want

**Sugawara:** i think you flustered him

**Kenma:** he didn’t fluster me

**Kenma:** i’m busy

**Kuroo:** yeah right

**Kuroo:** i bought you a game lol come upon ur door

**Kenma:** omg

**Sugawara:** ‘come upon ur door’

**Kageyama:** how did you spell open that wrong lol

**Nishinoya:** kageyama u rly think he’s going to answer u rn

**Kageyama:** what

**Nishinoya:** my man knows what he’s doin 😌

**Kageyama:** what

**Oikawa:** please don’t be implying what i think you’re implying

**Nishinoya:** guys

**Nishinoya:** my man kuroo FUCKS

**Nishinoya:** he knows what he’s doin w that video game

**Daichi:** why are you implying kuroo bought a video game for kenma just to have sex lol

**Hinata:** why are we talking about this

**Hinata:** kenma can’t be bought like that!!

**-**

**Kuroo:** actually he can, in fact, be bought like that

**Kenma:** stop coming in the groupchat every time we do something to announce it

**Kuroo:** THEY WERE ASKING

**Kenma:** THEY WEREN’T

**Hinata:** we weren’t!

**Kageyama:** we weren’t

**Nishinoya:** we were

**Oikawa:** we weren’t

**Daichi:** we weren’t

**Kenma:** see

**Kuroo:** sorry kitten ❤️ please forgive me

**Asahi:** Wow you’re really trying to work it today.

**Kenma:** stop

**Kenma:** i’m going to kick you out

**Kuroo:** let me eat that ass first ahaha

**Oikawa:** WHY 

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ Kuroo Stop Being So Horny _

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  _ i can’t help it, kenma is just too fuckable;) _

**Kenma** changed the group name to  _ Shitty Boys _

**Nishinoya:** u’re going all the way back to the original group name???

**Kenma:** Yes.

**Kenma:** It’s inappropriate to be talking about sex in a groupchat that was made for volleyball.

**Nishinoya:** LMAOOO KUROO YOU MADE HIM MAD

**Kuroo:** i know!!! He grabbed his switch and turned away and now he’s ignoring me 😭

**Kuroo:** he won’t even let me cuddle him!!!!!

**Kuroo:** kenma i’m sorry!!!!!!! Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Kenma:** apology not accepted. 

**Oikawa:** sometimes this groupchat doesn’t feel real

**Kuroo:** kenmaaa i love you i’m sorry for wanting you so physically even tho you’re such a hot piece of ass and left me for an entire weekend so i had to use my HAND to get off instead of urr mouth like an IDIOT!!!

**Hinata:** I DON’T WANT TO BE HERE

**Oikawa:** KUROO

**Daichi:** are you really expecting that to work??

**Kuroo:** it did work, he’s laughing

**Sugawara:** did u say that just to make him laugh?

**Kuroo:** yes

**Kuroo:** what can i say, i’m god’s gift to comdey

**Kenma:** do you mean comedy? Dumbass

**Sugawara:** your relationship weirds me out the more i see it

**Sugawara:** you two are just so… fucking weird

**Kuroo:** but it’s ok because he’s perfect and he maeks this relationship perfect 

**Kuroo:** and i couldn’t ask for anyone better for me than him

**Kuroo:** i’m so in love

**Kuroo:** and in lust ahaha 😋😼

**Oikawa:** you always ruin it 

**Nishinoya:** don’t say that he’s just living his truth

**Nishinoya:** i support you horny kuroo

**Kuroo:** thank u

**Kuroo:** SO DOES KENMA HE’S CUDDLIGN ME NWO YESSS

**Asahi:** Do none of you know how to spell?

**Asahi:** Just turn on autocorrect it isn’t that hard

**Kuroo:** ok accidental french keyboard.

**Nishinoya:** AHAHA

-

_ Shitty Boys _

**Oikawa:** do you guys believe in soulmates?

**Nishinoya:** yessss!!

**Asahi:** Yeah

**Yamaguchi:** yes

**Daichi:** Yes

**Kuroo:** how could i not 🥺

**Kageyama:** yes. Why?

**Oikawa:** idk~~

**Oikawa:** i just reaaally love iwaizumi!!

**Oikawa:** like he’s so perfect

**Oikawa:** and i can’t stop thinking about it 

**Oikawa:** he’s so good for me

**Oikawa:** and i can’t imagine ever being in love with anyone else

**Oikawa:** and like i can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with him 

**Oikawa:** and we’ll sit at our cute old house and i’ll still be sitting in his lap and cuddling him when we’re old

**Oikawa:** and i’ll still be calling him iwa-chan and he’ll still just call me an idiot but then he’ll smile that smile that’s only for me while he says it

**Oikawa:** he’s my soulmate and i’m so in love 

**Sugawara:** aww that’s so cute and sweet

**Iwaizumi:** He’s drunk.

**Sugawara:** LMAO REALLY

**Iwaizumi:** yes

**Iwaizumi:** lol

**Sugawara:** are you?

**Iwaizumi:** yes

**Iwaizumi:** lol

**Oikawa:** iwa-chan drinking omggg scandalous 

**Iwaizumi:** shut up idiot

**Oikawa:** iwaizumi hajime you’re my soulmate and i’m in love with you

**Iwaizumi:** shut up

**Oikawa:** you’re blushing

**Iwaizumi:** shut up

**Asahi:** Why don’t you two put your phones down and have this conversation face to face?

**Asahi:** You’re literally together. Just talk outside of the groupchat…

**Hinata:** TOORU YOU’RE DRINKING?

**Oikawa:** shouyou look away!!! I don’t want ot be a bad influence!!!!

**Hinata:** OKAY

**Kageyama:** Idiot.

**Oikawa:** r u calling me an idiot tobio??

**Iwaizumi:** hes’ talking to hinata, idiot.

**Oikawa:** tobio i’ve got my eye on you.

**Kageyama:** ...ok ?

**Asahi:** I want to go to sleep.

**Asahi:** Stop talking in the chat.

**Oikawa:** if you want to sleep just turn off notifications asahi~

**Asahi:** Yuu is here, and he reads the chat with his phone screen on full brightness tho

**Oikawa:** he;s a freak for that

**Iwaizumi:** you do the same thing

**Oikawa:** it’s different for me :(

**Iwaizumi:** why?

**Oikawa:** because you love me

**Iwaizumi:** oh 

**Asahi:** Please

**Daichi:** Yeah, I’d like to sleep too

**Sugawara:** then go to sleep you old man

**Daichi:** scoot closer to me and i will 😌

**Sugawara:** okay  **😋**

**Oikawa:** ur cuddling? Omg I wanna cuddle

**Oikawa:** iwa-channnnnnn

**Asahi** removed  **Iwaizumi** and  **Oikawa** from the chat

**Asahi:** I’m sorry, it had to be done.

**Asahi:** They can be added back in the morning.

**Sugawara:** so mean lol

**Asahi:** good NIGHT

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did that accidental French keyboard thing actually happen to me? maybe🙃


	24. This episode is just garbage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima: We’re getting a divorce
> 
> Yamaguchi: We aren’t married
> 
> Tsukishima: We will be one day. And then we will get divorced
> 
> Yamaguchi: You think we’ll get married??? 🥺

**Tsukishima** changed the group name to  _I’m in love_

**Tsukishima:** I love Yamaguchi so much

**Tsukishima:** He is the light of my life

**Tsukishima:** and he is so cute

**Tsukishima:** Dare I say the cutest person I’ve ever seen

**Oikawa:** I exist but go off

**Sugawara:** What a random love confession. Cute wtf

**Sugawara:** But I mean, we knew you were in love with him sooo

**Tsukishima:** I just wanted the world to know that I’m in love

**Daichi:** That’s weirdly cute

-

**Tsukishima:** I was taking a nap

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi stole my phone

**Yamaguchi:** teehee

**Kuroo:** Don’t lie

**Kageyama:** we don’t like liars here

**Tsukishima:** I hate you

**Yamaguchi:** Don’t lie

**Tsukishima:** We’re getting a divorce

**Yamaguchi:** We aren’t married

**Tsukishima:** We will be one day. And then we will get divorced

**Yamaguchi:** You think we’ll get married???  🥺

**Tanaka:** You’re insane if that’s all you got from what he said.

**Yamaguchi:** Shut up and imagine me and Tsukki married that’s so cute

**Yamaguchi:** You’re all invited to the wedding 😊

**Kuroo:** You’re getting married to get divorced. I-

**Yamaguchi:** You’re all invited except for Kuroo 😊

**Tsukishima:** Just because of that, we will not be getting a divorce

**Tsukishima:** See you all at the wedding, except for Kuroo 

-

**Kuroo:** Big spoon or little spoon

**Kenma:** Little

**Kuroo:** I know bbg come to my house pls and I will love you

**Kenma:** I’ll be over in a little. I just need to finish taking my bath

**Kuroo:** Kenma in the bath 😍

**Kenma:** Stop being gross, I’m gonna ignore you until I’m at your place

**Kuroo:** Baby nooooooo

**Sugawara:** Little spoon 😋

**Daichi:** That emoji looks so much like you lol

**Sugawara:** I thought so too

**Iwaizumi:** Big spoon

**Oikawa:** I think that’s unfair because I’m taller and Iwa-chan is small and cute

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up, you’re the one that initiates it

**Oikawa:** Don’t embarrass me

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t lie idiot

**Tsukishima:** Big spoon

**Tsukishima:** Imagine Hinata being the big spoon

**Tsukishima:** lol

**Nishinoya:** What’s weird about that?

**Nishinoya:** I’m the big spoon

**Asahi:** Because you say that I make you feel weak when you’re the little spoon

**Nishinoya:** BECAUSE YOU’RE TOO BIG

**Asahi:** TOO BIG?! WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

**Nishinoya:** Don’t yell at me

**Asahi:** Don’t make me feel self conscious

**Daichi:** If you’re going to argue, do it outside of the chat so you don’t make others feel awkward

**Asahi:** We’re not like really arguing

**Nishinoya:** WE AREN’T?

**Asahi:** No we aren’t lol

**Nishinoya:** Oh thank goodness

**Nishinoya:** Just so you know Asahi, you’re not too big

**Nishinoya:** You are more than adequate in more ways than one

**Nishinoya:** 😉

**Kuroo:** I was just curious on how everyone cuddled

**Kuroo:** Not whether Asahi was packing or not

**Daichi:** I don’t want to be here anymore

**Nishinoya:** 😉😉😉😉

**Asahi:** Why 

**Asahi:** Why did you word it in such a weird way

**Asahi:** But thanks 🥰

**Kuroo:** I have no words for you two

-

**Kageyama:** Freckles

**Tsukishima:** Freckles

**Hinata:** why

**Kageyama:** Freckles

**Hinata:** you scare me

**Kuroo:** freckles

**Kenma:** stop that

**Kuroo:** freckles

**Kageyama:** hinata has

**Kageyama:** freckles

**Kageyama:** and I

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Kageyama:** I want to kiss him so much

**Kageyama:** just so much

**Iwaizumi:** freckles are cute

**Oikawa:** sorry I don’t have any Iwa-Chan

**Iwaizumi:** what

**Oikawa:** I guess I’ll never be enough for you

**Iwaizumi:** stop

**Oikawa:** maybe I’ll draw some on. Will you love me then?

**Iwaizumi:** I do love you

**Iwaizumi:** stop that idiot

**Oikawa:** 😔

**Iwaizumi:** why are you doing this

**Oikawa:** I wish you’d love me 

**Oikawa:** maybe you would if I was prettier.

**Iwaizumi:** you’re the prettiest and I love you

**Oikawa:** when he thinks you’re pretty 😳😳

**Iwaizumi:** I hate you now

**Oikawa:** 💖💖

-

**Kuroo:** GUYS

**Kenma:** shut up

**Kuroo:** GUYS

**Daichi:** yes

**Kuroo:** GUYS

**Kuroo:** EVERYONE

**Kuroo:** I FOUND THE GREATEST THING

**Kenma:** you piss me off

**Kenma:** and if I remove you, you’ll just tell everyone individually 

**Kuroo** : KENMA OWNS PANTIES

**Kenma:** die die die die die

**Daichi:** ?? How did you find this out?

**Kuroo:** HE WAS NAPPING AND I WAS CLEANING UP HIS ROOM

**Kuroo:** AND I FOUND THEM

**Kenma:** we’re breaking up

**Kenma:** you’re never invited over again

**Kenma:** don’t even think about me anymore

**Iwaizumi:** it’s okay Kenma. I found something similar in Oikawa’s room

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN SHUT UP

**Iwaizumi:** it’s not even that bad

**Kenma:** omg omg what was it

**Oikawa** removed  **Iwaizumi** from the chat

**Oikawa:** not today

**Oikawa:** not ever

-

**Hinata:** I just CAUGHT UP WITH THE CHAT

**Hinata:** This is what you deserve Kenma 😌

**Kageyama** added  **Iwaizumi** to the chat

**Oikawa:** DO YOU TWO CONSPIRE AGAINST ME

**Hinata:** Wut

**Kageyama:** wut

**Oikawa:** I’m NOTHING BUT NICE TO BOTH OF YOU

**Oikawa:** AND YOU PUT ME IN SITUATIONS LIKE THIS

**Iwaizumi:** when you hated Kageyama teehee

**Iwaizumi:** It’s not a big deal calm down

**Sugawara:** It really isn’t!

**Sugawara:** We’re all into our own things so there’s no need to feel uncomfortable!

**Sugawara:** Just be a proud panty owner like me 😊

**Daichi:** Suga

**Sugawara:** 😚

**Oikawa:** I just

**Oikawa:** WHY IS EVERYONE HERE SO OPEN

**Kuroo:** Because we’re horny and in love

**Iwaizumi:** We don’t have to share anything you don’t want to Oikawa

**Oikawa:** It’s such an intimate thing to talk about

**Kuroo:** We just do it so much that we’re comfortable with it 😼

**Kenma:** Kuro

**Kuroo:** And because it’s fun to tease you Oikawa

**Kenma:** Tgats true I love being better than Oikawa

**Oikawa:** everyone hates me here

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading!!!


	25. That drawing of Tsukishima on all fours with his ass up and he’s just spreading his cheeks and it surprises me so much every single time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: I’m 😈🤤🤤😼👅🍑💦💦
> 
> Asahi: when you actually are
> 
> Kuroo: Asahi, you’re 🥺🥰☺️🐣🦦🦔🎋🍂 and all the other cute ones
> 
> Nishinoya: HE IS
> 
> Kuroo: Bokuto is 💔💔 BECAUSE HE ISNT HERE

**Tsukishima:** _ Attached image _

**Daichi:** Are you all at the arcade?

**Hinata:** YUP

**Hinata:** Kageyama won me a stuffed larvitar

**Hinata:** _ Attached image _

**Kenma:** That’s so cute

**Kenma:** I want one

**Kuroo:** I’ll buy you one

**Kenma:** 🥺 I love you

**Nishinoya:** kuroo be my sugar daddy

**Asahi:** no

**Kenma:** no

**Kuroo:** I’ll venmo you $5 bb

**Nishinoya:** 🥴 thanks

**Hinata:** Kageyama doesn’t think he looks like larvitar

**Hinata:** Tell him he's wrong please

**Oikawa:** He looks like gastly

**Oikawa:** round ass head

**Hinata:** why

**Hinata:** stop

**Sugawara:** Is this a double date?

**Yamaguchi:** Yes

**Sugawara:** Why weren’t me and Daichi invited

**Kageyama:** that would be like me inviting my parents

**Sugawara:** DAICHI

**Sugawara:** HE HAS ACCEPTED HIS ROLE AS OUR SON 

**Daichi:** I’m so glad to have a son like you Kageyama

**Daichi:** go on and enjoy your date

**Sugawara:** :’-)

**Oikawa:** You’re so weird

**Nishinoya:** Asahi, lets crash their date

**Asahi:** No

**Nishinoya:** Tanaka, lets crash their date

**Tanaka:** No

**Nishinoya:** I guess everyone hates fun here wow

**Oikawa:** I want to go on a date

**Iwaizumi:** Let's go on one

**Iwaizumi:** This weekend

**Oikawa:** 🥰 I can’t wait!

-

**Daichi:** Suga exists

**Daichi:** Like how is that allowed 

**Kuroo:** wut

**Daichi:** He’s so perfect

**Daichi:** I miss him

**Kuroo:** Where is he?

**Daichi:** At home

**Iwaizumi:** Hang out with him then?

**Daichi:** I can’t

**Daichi:** I’m working on my clinginess and I’m going crazy lol

**Sugawara:** Daichi I literally told you it’s fine

**Sugawara:** You’re so cute lol

**Sugawara:** But I’m actually really tired so we can hang out tomorrow 😊

**Daichi:** Okay!

**Daichi:** goodnight everyone

**Kuroo:** lol night 

**Iwaizumi:** night

**Sugawara:** Goodnight 💗

-

**Tanaka:** Daichi I’m laughing but I’m sobbing

**Nishinoya:** He’s so wholesome but why isn’t he embarrassed

**Oikawa:** He’s in love, leave him alone

**Oikawa:** I think it’s cute

**Daichi:** _ Attached image _

**Daichi:** Look at this man

**Daichi:** He exists

**Daichi:** my serotonin is at an all time high

**Daichi:** I’m invincible

**Tanaka:** You’re embarrassing

**Oikawa:** LEAVE HIM ALONE HE’S SO CUTE

**Tanaka:** You’re so passionate about Daichi being in love

**Oikawa:** Because him and Suga are so

**Oikawa:** Wholesome? That's the only word coming to mind

**Oikawa:** Soulmates

**Kuroo:** Do you think me and kenma are soulmates 😼😈😳😳😳😎

**Oikawa:** I think you’re an idiot

**Kuroo:** I think you’re jealous

**Oikawa:** I have a boyfriend?

**Kuroo:** No, you’re jealous of my charm and my good looks

**Oikawa:** I’m the prettiest one here. Next

**Daichi:** Anyways, back to Suga

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Asahi:** sTOp

**Asahi:** ITS SO CUTE SOTP

**Nishinoya:** OMGOMFGOMFG DAICHI HAS SO MANY SUGA PICS

**Daichi:** This is only my most recent?

**Kenma:** I can imagine how your camera roll looks

**Sugawara:** Daichi aw stop

**Sugawara:** Iminloveiminloveiminloveiminlove

**Tsukishima:** This is kinda gross to be apart of

**Tsukishima:** Who flirts this much?

**Tsukishima:** and so openly

**Nishinoya:** not asahi 

**Asahi:** why do you always make it about you

**Nishinoya:** i wouldn’t have to if my BOYFRIEND MADE IT ALL ABOUT ME FOR ONCE

**Asahi:** You are actually insane

**Oikawa:** wow same

**Iwaizumi:** I

**Iwaizumi:** nevermind

**Oikawa:** you what? Always make fun of me? Always scold me?

**Iwaizumi:** you’re dumb

**Asahi:** Oikawa and noya are more similar than I thought

**Tanaka** changed the group name to  **Everyone is Yuu**

**Tanaka:** we’re all a little Noya aren’t we?

**Daichi:** no

**Tsukishima:** absolutely not

**Asahi:** nope

**Nishinoya:** it’s because I’m an unmatched level of epic 😎

**Asahi** left the group

**Nishinoya:** MY LOVE COME BACK

**Nishinoya** added  **Asahi** to the group

**Nishinoya:** if you leave, I leave. And I like it here.

**Kuroo:** do you ever just

**Kuroo** added  **Bokuto** to the group

**Kuroo:** crave Bokuto?

**Kuroo:** he hasn’t replied to me on our private chat in a bit

**Kenma:** no, I don’t.

**Kenma** added  **Akaashi** to the group

**Kenma:** but I do crave Akaashi

**Kuroo:** where is my man

**Kenma:** maybe give him more than 4 seconds to respond

**Kageyama:** omg is akaashi going to reply

**Hinata:** are you in love with him or something

**Kageyama:** no idiot. He’s a good setter

**Hinata:** you called him pretty

**Kageyama:** let’s not bring that up if you’re gonna be weird about it

**Kageyama:** that was so long ago

**Sugawara:** I wanna bring something old up!!

**Sugawara:** I remember that night I just might regret that night for the rest of my days

**Daichi:** nO SUGA KUROO WILL START

**Kenma:** I NEED TO NOT HEAR HIM SING MORE HANILTON THANH E ALREADY DOES PLWASE

**Sugawara:** 🤐

**Oikawa:** I’ve never touched that emoji before

**Sugawara:** yeah because you look like 🥰🤪🎀💖✨💫🍓🍊

**Sugawara:** and you barely use the emoji keyboard

**Daichi:** Suga, you look like 😋🥰😚😇🌸🌼🌙🍒💗💕

**Sugawara:** Aw Aw Aw 

**Sugawara:** I’d give you some emojis but there aren’t any for the man of my dreams

**Kuroo:** I’m 😈🤤🤤😼👅🍑💦💦

**Asahi:** when you actually are

**Kuroo:** Asahi, you’re 🥺🥰☺️🐣🦦🦔🎋🍂 and all the other cute ones

**Nishinoya:** HE IS

**Kuroo:** Bokuto is 💔💔 BECAUSE HE ISNT HERE

**Akaashi:** Bokuto is taking a nap, so give him some time

**Kuroo:** a nap😼

**Kuroo:** and both of you have been inactive on your phones for some time now

**Kuroo:** sounds suspicious

**Kuroo:** sounds a little 😈😈🥴🍆🍑💦💦💦

**Akaashi:** I’m not sure what you want from me

**Kuroo:** say that Bokuto FUCKS

**Kenma:** stop

**Akaashi:** Bokuto fucks

**Akaashi:** I’m gonna finish taking a nap with him. Bye for now

**Kuroo:** BOKUTO FUCKS

**Nishinoya:** BOKUTO FUCKS

**Oikawa:** BOKUTO FUCKS

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!! Also I think I'm 😤🙀🤯🧠🐝🌻⭐️🎆💕🥰😡😡😤 and the other author is 😋🥰😻😚🥵✨💕☘️🌸💥🍉💖😈


	26. This but it's an episode and I say it 3 times

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata: You’re so 😍 kageyama 
> 
> Kageyama: :-)

_ Everyone is Yuu _

**Kuroo:** Serious question

**Kuroo:** Do I buy Kenma panties or??

**Akaashi:** Why are you asking everyone? Ask Kenma

**Akaashi** removed  **Bokuto** from the group

**Akaashi** left the group

**Daichi:** lol

**Kenma:** Only if you want so stop asking weird things

**Kuroo:** lolol sorry

**Kenma:** Also, it’s sweet but please stop spending money on me

**Kuroo:** Never

**Kuroo:** You’re my sweet cute baby angel soulmate and I must give you everything

**Kuroo:** That and it helps me feel less regret when I resort to retail therapy 

**Kuroo:** So send your size my way bbg

**Kenma:** Ugly

**Oikawa:** Hello everyone. I would like you all to see this

**Oikawa:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** Did you make those?

**Kenma:** Why are you being so formal

**Iwaizumi:** He did make them

**Kageyama:** Macarons? 

**Kageyama:** Oikawa can’t make pancakes

**Kageyama:** But he can make macarons?

**Iwaizumi:** I would like to point out that there are only four because he was struggling and fucked them up.

**Iwaizumi:** He chose the four prettiest

**Iwaizumi:** And they taste really good. Even the broken ones

**Oikawa:** i’ll keep trying

**Oikawa:** I just wanna be a good wife

**Kageyama:** It’s kinda rainy out, so maybe try making them tomorrow? It’s supposed to be a clear day

**Oikawa:** What does rain have to do with macarons

**Kageyama:** Macarons are kinda difficult. The humidity makes it hard for them to rise and the feet will even crack

**Kageyama:** You did a really good job for your first try though

**Hinata:** You’re so 😍 kageyama 

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Oikawa:** Wait, does Tobio know how to make them?

**Kageyama:** Yeah lol

**Oikawa:** I LITERALLY THOUGHT YOU ONLY THOUGHT ABOUT VOLLEYBALL

**Hinata:** And me!

**Oikawa:** I LITERALLY THOUGHT YOU ONLY THOUGHT ABOUT VOLLEYBALL AND SHOUYOU

**Kageyama:** I stress bake and cook

**Kageyama:** maybe I’ll make some tomorrow too

**Yamaguchi:** Can I have some?

**Kageyama:** Sure!

**Sugawara:** I can’t imagine you baking omg

**Sugawara:** Do you have an apron?

**Kuroo:** Please say yes

**Kageyama:** yes

**Kuroo: 😍**

**Hinata:** 😍😍😍

**Tanaka:** Hear me out

**Tanaka:** We buy him a cute frilly apron

**Kageyama:** No 

**Tanaka:** WHY NOT

**Kageyama:** I’d just make hinata wear it

**Kageyama:** On second thought, I’d love an apron like that

**Hinata:** I hate you

**Kageyama:** It’d be cute

**Kenma:** we should all bake something

**Kenma:** And then we can all meet up and share it

**Nishinoya:** THAT SOUNDS SO FUN ME AND ASAHI ARE IN

**Asahi:** We don’t know how to bake

**Nishinoya:** We can do something simple

**Oikawa:** This does sound fun omg!!

**Daichi:** Maybe we can dedicate a few days of break to it? 

**Daichi:** If we’re all free

**Yamaguchi:** I already can’t wait!

-

**Oikawa:** _ Attached image _

**Kageyama:** They look great

**Oikawa:** I guess it was the humidity huh

**Oikawa:** I just gotta work on sizing

**Kageyama:** I use a silicone mat

**Kageyama:** It has circles printed on them for like a guide

**Oikawa:** I’ll have to get one!

**Kuroo:** I want sweets now

**Kuroo:** Kenmaaa invite me over

**Kenma:** When have you ever needed an invitation

**Kenma:** Come over

**Kuroo:** 🏃🏻‍♂️

-

**Kuroo:** Update

**Kuroo:** Kenma had no sweets at his house

**Kuroo:** But i ate ass again so maybe that counts

**Kenma:** Update

**Kenma:** We’re BREAKINGGUP

**Kuroo:** Update

**Kuroo:** pls bbg no who’s ass will I eat

**Kenma:** Update

**Kenma** left the group

**Kuroo** added  **Kenma** to the group

**Oikawa:** Update

**Oikawa:** Kuroo is a freak

**Kuroo:** Update

**Kuroo:** I’m not, I just love eating Kenma’s ass

**Hinata:** Update

**Hinata:** Let Kuroo live, he’s doing what he loves

**Kuroo:** Update

**Kuroo:** thank you hinata

**Kenma:** You’re the horniest bitch here

**Kuroo:** Only for you bb😼

**Kenma:** 💗

**Kenma:** Suga is second horniest

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Daichi:** you literally are

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Nishinoya:** You were so passionate about throat fucking

**Sugawara:** Throat fucking ✨😍

**Sugawara:** Who isn’t passionate about that

**Nishinoya:** Me

**Sugawara:** that’s a sign of weakness

**Nishinoya:** WEAKNESS

**Nishinoya:** DO YOU SEE HOW SMALL I AM

**Sugawara:** Not a good excuse. You take 6’14 dick soooo

**Sugawara:** Try getting your throat fucked and then talk to me

**Asahi:** That’s not even a height

**Nishinoya:** FINE ASAHI COME OVER 

**Asahi:** Why is this a competition

**Tanaka:** HAHSHHA I CNAT BREATHR

**Nishinoya:** ACTUALLY NO IM ON MY WAY

**Asahi:** what is going on

**Asahi:** Suga look what you’ve done

**Kenma:** Awww Noya’s first throat fucking

**Sugawara:** A milestone really

**Asahi:** HES ALREADY HERE HE GOT HERE SO FAST IM NERVOUS

**Daichi:** Suga why

**Sugawara:** 😇

**Oikawa:** Daichi, get your mans

**Sugawara:** Asahi and Noya, you’re welcome

**Asahi:** I hate you suga

**Sugawara:** 😇

**Nishinoya** removed  **Asahi** from the group

**Nishinoya** left the group

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading!!!


	27. head empty just that one scene where daichi is like tsukishima you need to eat more and then kuroo's like eat veggies too and then yells at kenma to eat veggies because he's in love with him and they're in love in this scene and always

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: everytime i see that emoji my lifespan is shortened by 30 years.
> 
> Kuroo: 😧😧😧😧
> 
> Sugawara: 😧😧😧
> 
> Tanaka: 😧😧😧😧😧😧
> 
> Iwaizumi: 😦
> 
> Oikawa: aww Iwa-chan ❤️❤️ 

_ Everyone is Yuu _

**Sugawara:** i miss daichi

**Oikawa:** go hang out with him

**Sugawara:** well

**Sugawara:** HE’S BUSY TODAY

**Sugawara:** he can’t even be on his phone :(

**Sugawara:** we can’t all be like kenma and kuroo

**Kuroo:** the sad truth

**Kuroo:** are you ready to admit that kenma and i are the superior couple?

**Sugawara** has removed  **Kuroo** from the chat

**Oikawa:** i think me and iwa-chan are the superior couple actually (☆>⊇<)

**Iwaizumi:** no we aren’t because you’re part of it

**Oikawa:** so mean 💔

**Sugawara:** hey

**Sugawara:** let’s get back to me???

**Sugawara:** i miss daichi

**Kenma** added  **Kuroo** to the chat

**Kuroo:** kenma does love me 

**Kenma:** you’re stupid of course i do

**Sugawara:** guys we’re supposed to be talking about me!

**Sugawara:** i’m shaking i’m crying i miss my daichi 

**Kuroo:** excuse me that’s MY line

**Sugawara:** you can’t own lines

**Kuroo:** you can’t own the title of superior couple

**Sugawara:** it’s the truth

**Kuroo:** well

**Kuroo:** shaking and crying and missing kenma is MY truth 

**Kuroo:** stop trying to steal that away from me

**Sugawara:** you just want me to die, don’t you?

**Sugawara:** if you hated me so much why didn’t you say something

**Sugawara:** i get it i get it you all only like me because i’m daichi’s main squeeze

**Sugawara:** the bane of his existence

**Oikawa:** Suga why are you being like this

**Oikawa:** and kenma why are you letting kuroo be so dramatic 

**Kenma:** sometimes i just have to let him speak

**Kenma:** it’s better for everyone if he just gets it off his chest

**Oikawa:** what does that even mean

**Hinata:** kenma says sometimes he’ll walk around ranting about things for hours

**Kenma:** yeah and he dooesn’t stop 

**Kenma:** he just

**Kenma:** paces and rants

**Kenma:** it’s so annoying

**Kuroo:** u think i’m annoying? 💔

**Sugawara:** and you want to say you’re the superior couple?

**Sugawara:** i never think daichi’s annoying

**Sugawara:** unless when we’re eating popcorn together sometimes he sticks the popcorn in his mouth and sucks on it until it dissolves 

**Sugawara:** it gives me nightmares

**Sugawara:** but anyway WE’RE SUPPOSED TO BE TALKING ABOUT ME!

**Oikawa:** suga your spotlight is up just accept it

**Oikawa:** everyone’s bored of you and your problems

**Sugawara:** even daichi 

**Sugawara:** there’s no other reason he’d be busy today 💔😔

**Oikawa:** yeah exactly

**Iwaizumi:** tooru shut up

**Oikawa:** iwa-chan 💔😢

**Kuroo:** glad to kno everyone else’s boyfriends hate them too 💔

**Kenma:** why are you being like this?

**Kenma:** you piss me off

**Oikawa:** he’s basically breaking up with you kuroo. He hates u

**Iwaizumi:** tooru shut up

**Hinata:** not everyone’s boyfriends hate them!! Kageyama doesn’t hate me

**Oikawa:** shouyou i’m sure there’s something

**Oikawa:** it isn’t hard to find things to hate about you

**Kenma:** yeah\

**Hinata:** shut up kenma! you can’t even type!

**Kenma:** that’s because kuro is laying on me

**Kenma:** it’s hard to see my screen

**Kenma:** and to move my arms

**Kenma:** he’s so big

**Kuroo:** so you hate me?

**Kenma:** yeagh i really do

**Kageyama:** there isn’t anything i hate about hinata

**Oikawa:** there has to be something annoying about him though right

**Iwaizumi:** tooru why are you being this way today

**Iwaizumi:** leave them alone

**Iwaizumi:** don’t plant things into their heads

**Oikawa:** i’m not planting anything i’m simply watering the seeds of doubt that are already there~

**Iwaizumi** has removed  **Oikawa** from the chat

**Iwaizumi:** i’m sorry, he’s embarrassing me.

**Iwaizumi:** i think he’s having a bad day lol

**Iwaizumi:** i’m going over to his apartment after work

**Hinata:** keep us updated!!!

**Sugawara:** yeah!

**Iwaizumi:** he doesn’t deserve u guys worrying about him

**Iwaizumi:** ew

**Iwaizumi:** yes he does. I’m being mean

**Iwaizumi:** he deserves the world

**Kuroo:** kageyama and iwaizumi are the best boyfriends in this chat

**Kuroo:** what does it feel like to be superior

**Sugawara:** daichi exists but ok

**Kuroo:** daichi left u all day 

**Sugawara:** ur right

**Kenma:** u two are so needy

**Kuroo:** needy gang rise up 

**Sugawara:** yes!

-

**Daichi:** just caught up with the chat lol

**Daichi:** what is wrong with you guys

**Sugawara:** daichi! I missed you! So much!

**Daichi:** I know

**Kuroo:** daichi! Where were you!? I missed you!

**Sugawara:** YOU missed him?

**Kuroo:** more than anything.

**Daichi:** Lol

**Daichi:** I told Ukai I’d help him out with the shop

**Sugawara:** A working man!!! So sexy!!!

**Kuroo:** A WORKING MAN!!! SO SEXY!!!

**Sugawara:** why are you just repeating what i said in caps

**Kuroo:** so he’ll pay attention to me and not you

**Sugawara:** why are you doing this to me

**Kuroo:** because daichi is my man…

**Kageyama:** i thought i was your man

**Kuroo:** i can’t have two?

**Sugawara:** kenma come get your man

**Kuroo:** lol u thought!!!

**Kuroo:** kenma is post orgasm sleeping he isn’t waking up for a WHILE

**Kageyama:** did we really need to know that

**Kuroo:** obviously???

**Kuroo:** yeah i eat ass AND i fuck

**Kuroo: 😈**

**Nishinoya:** YEAH KUROO!!!!

**Asahi:** stop making me uncomfortable in the groupchat, guys…

**Hinata:** yeah!!   
  


**-**

**Iwaizumi** added  **Oikawa** to the chat

**Oikawa:** your favorite setter is back~~~

**Oikawa:** And also sorry for being mean to you guys earlier!

**Kuroo:** akaashi????

**Kenma:** akaashi is your favorite setter

**Kenma:** really

**Kenma:** akaashi

**Kuroo:** i

**Kuroo:** kinda

**Kuroo:** ...forgot you were a setter hahaha

**Kuroo:** funny right

**Kuroo:** ahaha so funny

**Kenma** has left the chat

**Kuroo:** hfdjhg

**Hinata:** how are you tooru?????

**Oikawa:** i was having such a bad day!!! And iwaizumi came over and brought me a slice of cake from my favorite bakery!!!! And then layed in bed with me and cuddled me and kissed me so much!!!

**Sugawara:** Stop bragging.

**Oikawa:** i’m not bragging sugawara~

**Oikawa:** i just have the best boyfriend in the universe!~~

**Kuroo:** i msis kenma

**Oikawa:** maybe next time don’t forget that he’s your favorite setter 

**Kuroo:** i am being completely honest

**Kuroo:** i actually forgot

**Kuroo:** because he’s laying on me 

**Kuroo:** and like

**Kuroo:** he keeps really lightly kissing my neck because he’s like

**Kuroo:** ‘i just want to kiss you kuro’

**Kuroo:** and i know that he’s only doing it because he’s comfortable and doesn’t want to move to give me an actual kiss

**Kuroo:** but my heart is melting

**Kuroo:** and i’m flustered 

**Kuroo:** and so like

**Kuroo:** u said setter my blank ass mind said akaashi

**Sugawara:** that still doesn’t make sense but okay

**Oikawa:** freak

**Kuroo:** shut up i’m flustered 

**Kuroo:** he’s so precious

**Oikawa:** why don’t you tell him that

**Oikawa:** instead of pissing him off enough for him to leave the chat

**Oikawa:** Lol

**Kuroo:** he knows

**Kuroo:** i know he knows

**Kuroo:** becayse after he left he started doing it mnroe

**Kuroo:** actually brb

**Nishinoya:** YES KUROO

**Tanaka:** YES KUROO

**Tanaka** changed the group name to  _ kuroo FUCKS  _

**Kuroo:** facts

-

_ Kuroo FUCKS _

**Kenma:** kuro fucking sucks

**Kuroo:** shut up

**Kenma:** no. if you get to tell the groupchat everytime we fuck then i get to say this

**Kuroo:** shut up

**Oikawa:** so vulgar kenma!!

**Kenma:** anyway

**Kenma:** kuro sucks at mario kart 

**Kenma:** like he’s so horrible

**Kenma:** i’m literally shocked

**Kuroo:** kenma shut UP

**Kuroo:** i’ve never been so angry in my life

**Kenma:** it’s kind of ufnny 

**Kenma:** i touched him and he was so rigid and tense

**Kenma:** kuro i think you need to rela.x

**Kenma:** and just accept that you fucking suck.

**Sugawara:** aww he can’t be that bad!

**Kenma:** join our game lol

**Kenma:** you’kl see

**Sugawara:** ok!!

-

**Sugawara:** kuroo fucking sucks

**Kuroo:** SHUT UP

**Kenma:** kuro it’s ok

**Kenma:** i’m sure if shouyou was playing you wouldn’t be last place

**Hinata:** WHY ARE YOU MAKING THIS ABOUT ME

**Kenma:** you’re bad at everything

**Kenma:** so it only makes sense

**Hinata:** kenma i hate you.

**Kenma:** yeah, yeah.

**Oikawa:** i don’t really play video games

**Kageyama:** neither do i

**Yamaguchi:** i do!!

**Yamaguchi:** except i like to play farming games

**Sugawara:** lol they’re just so mind numbing 

**Sugawara:** it’s so nice

**Sugawara:** especially after coming home from a long day dealing with you idiots.

**Hinata:** thanks suga.

**Nishinoya:** wow

**Asahi:** even me??

**Sugawara:** especially you.

**Asahi:** 😦

**Hinata:** eyebrows please!

**Asahi: 😧**

**Hinata:** thank you

**Oikawa:** why do you guys listen to him when he says that

**Oikawa:** everytime i see that emoji my lifespan is shortened by 30 years.

**Kuroo: 😧😧😧😧**

**Sugawara: 😧😧😧**

**Tanaka: 😧😧😧😧😧😧**

**Iwaizumi: 😦**

**Oikawa:** aww Iwa-chan ❤️❤️ 

**Iwaizumi:** … ❤️

**Nishinoya:** aww a hesitant heart

**Nishinoya:** he’s shy

**Nishinoya** : reminds me of my asahi

**Nishinoya:** I miss u asahi 💔🥺

**Asahi:** i can come over if u want🥺

**Nishinoya:** pls 🥺🥺🥺

  
  



	28. if i have to be this :-( then so does kenma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata: has he downloaded that soap cutting game yet
> 
> Kuroo: yes 
> 
> Oikawa: oh no

_ kuroo FUCKS  _

**Kuroo:** kenmaaaa

**Kuroo:** kenma bby i miss youuuuu

**Kuroo:** baby answer your phoneeee

**Tsukishima:** haven’t we been over this?

**Tsukishima:** saying it in the groupchat isn’t going to make him more likely to answer. 

**Hinata:** kenmaaaaaa

**Oikawa:** kenmaaaa answer kuroooooooo so he doesn’t do this for an hourrrr

**Hinata:** kenmaaaaaaaaaaaaa

**Tsukishima:** stop

**Kuroo:** babyyyyyyy

**Kuroo:** babeeeeeeeee

**Kuroo:** kittennnnnnn 

**Kuroo:** sweetieeeeeeeee

**Kuroo:** wait i don’t call him that

**Kuroo:** hottest piece of ass ever in the universe whom i love with my entire heart and soullllllllll

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Kuroo:** KENMA PLEASEEEE

**Sugawara:** why don’t you go over to his place? Didn’t that work last time?

**Kuroo:** sugawara you’re a genius

**Sugawara:** thanks, i know 😇

**Oikawa:** excuse me

**Oikawa:** when he called me a genius for suggesting that last time you said it was obvious

**Sugawara:** yeah but this is different

**Oikawa:** why

**Sugawara:** because i’m a genius

**Sugawara:** kuroo, if you find him when you get to his house let us know!

**Nishinoya:** such a good mom!!!

**Sugawara:** after he almost died in the sun i’m kind of concerned if he’s not answering 

**Oikawa:** that’s fair because kenma doesn’t know how to take care of himself

**Kuroo:** ok i just finished showering so i’m leaving soon and i’ll keep u all updated!!

**Nishinoya:** update us if u get ass too

**Kuroo:** don’t i always?;)

-

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Kuroo fucks? _

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  _ Not today _

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ why? _

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  _ he’s not in the mood _

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ can’t u make him in the mood?;);) _

**Kuroo:** no, he’s upset today

**Kuroo:** my poor baby :(

**Oikawa:** have him call me

**Kuroo:** alright!

**Tsukishima:** why would he call you

**Hinata:** kenma always calls him when he’s upset

**Hinata:** tooru’s a really good listener

**Hinata:** i’m never sad or angry after i talk to him on the phone!!!

**Oikawa:** that’s bc you two are my children and the lights of my life and i’ll do anything to make you happy

**Daichi:** awww that’s cute

**Tanaka:** why did you two communicate through changing the group name

**Sugawara:** that’s what you got out of this?

**Tanaka:** yeah

**Tanaka:** kenma if ur reading the chat rn i hope u feel better soon ❤️

**Nishinoya:** ryu ur such a sweet guy!!!!!!

**Nishinoya:** i love you!!!!!

**Tanaka:** yuuuuu come over to my house!!!! I miss you!!!!!

**Nishinoya:** i’m on my way!!!!!!!

-

**Oikawa** and  **Kenma**

**Oikawa:** kenma

**Oikawa:** i know you aren’t reading the groupchat 

**Oikawa:** and i know kuroo’s probably already told you

**Oikawa:** but remember that you can call me if you need to!

**Kenma:** Thank you

**Kenma:** But I think I’d rather be left alone right now

-

**Kuroo** and  **Oikawa** private message

**Oikawa:** he doesn’t even want to talk on the phone :/

**Kuroo:** i know, i’ve been here for like two hours and he’s barely said anything.

**Kuroo:** it’s thursday, so i think i’m going to stay for the weekend

**Oikawa:** good good good

**Oikawa:** anything for our kenma right 🥺

**Kuroo:** exactly 🥺

-

_ can’t u make him in the mood?;);) _

**Kageyama:** how’s kenma doing?

**Kageyama:** it’s been a few days and we haven’t heard anything

**Kuroo:** gasp

**Kuroo:** kageyama are you worried?

**Kageyama:** yeah

**Kuroo:** GASP

**Hinata:** i am too!

**Hinata:** how is he?

**Kenma** has left the chat

**Hinata:** oh it’s one of those

**Daichi:** what?

**Hinata:** sometimes when kenma’s really depressed he doesn’t like when his notifications go off

**Hinata:** like sometimes he’ll let them just collect and not care

**Hinata:** and sometimes he doesn’t like seeing notifications at all

**Kuroo:** yeah

**Kuroo:** i’ve had his phone most of the weekend tbh because i’ve been trying to get him to do something other than just lay down and play on it

**Hinata:** has he downloaded that soap cutting game yet

**Kuroo:** yes 

**Oikawa:** oh no

**Daichi:** what

**Oikawa:** he always downloads this stupid soap cutting game on his phone when he’s depressed 

**Oikawa:** i don’t know why

**Oikawa:** it’s horrible

**Sugawara:** i think i know which app you’re talking about

**Oikawa:** yeah it’s ugly

**Kuroo:** anyway, i’m gonna go again

**Yamaguchi:** ok! I hope he feels better soon! 💚

**Kuroo:** thanks strawberry head

**Yamaguchi:** what does that mean

**Kuroo:** you look like a strawberry

**Yamaguchi:** i’m going to rise above and pretend like i didn’t read that 💆🏻‍

**Tsukishima:** you’re so dramatic

**Yamaguchi:** tsukki!! I miss you!

**Yamaguchi:** can you come over and help me rise above 💆🏻‍♂️

**Tsukishima:** i don’t know what that means

**Tsukishima:** but sure, I was already on my way anyways.

**Yamaguchi:** yay!!!

**Hinata:** lol

**Hinata:** strawberry head

**Iwaizumi:** hinata you can’t talk here

**Nishinoya:** oH YEAH I FORGOT ABOUT THAT

**Tanaka:** hinata do you still wash your hair with that shampoo every time you hang out with kageyama?

**Hinata:** shut up

**Yamaguchi:** strawberry head

**Hinata:** strawberry head!

**Kageyama:** stop that

**Kageyama:** and leave shouyou alone, his hair smells good

**Kageyama:** there’s nothing wrong with that

**Tsukishima:** we get it, you’re in love

**Kageyama:** shut up

**Hinata:** in love?

**Hinata:** with 

**Hinata:** ME?

**Kageyama:** shut up 

**Kageyama:** i didn’t want to say anything yet

**Hinata:** aww

**Hinata:** i love you too

**Asahi:** can’t you do this in your own chat…

**Oikawa:** no

**Oikawa:** i’m taking a screenshot of this to show kenma when he’s feeling better omg

**Oikawa:** he’ll be so mad he missed it

**Hinata:** shut up i hate you two

**-**

**Kuroo** and  **Oikawa:**

**Oikawa:** hey

**Oikawa:** i’m in tokyo right now

**Oikawa:** are you still at kenma’s?

**Kuroo:** yeah

**Oikawa:** i’m coming over

**Kuroo:** okay, i’ll leave the door unlocked!

**-**

_ can’t u make him in the mood?;);) _

**Kuroo** added  **Kenma** to the chat

**Nishinoya:** kenma’s back!!!!

**Kenma:** yeah lol

**Hinata:** i missed you!!

**Kenma:** i missed you too

**Sugawara:** are you alright?

**Kenma:** i’m fine! I guess i was just

**Kenma:** Too stressed or something

**Kenma:** The worms in my brain were sad

**Kenma:** Idk

**Kenma:** sorry if i made anyone worry

**Nishinoya:** it’s ok kenma!!!

**Nishinoya:** we all care about u and want u to be okay!!!

**Kenma:** aww. Stop

**Kuroo:** he’s blushing

**Kenma:** shut up. I’m not.

**Kuroo:** Yeah you are

**Kenma:** i’m not

**Kuroo:** you are

**Kenma:** i’m not

**Daichi:** ok that’s enough

**Kuroo:** kenma you better stop

**Kuroo:** u got me feelin some typa way 🥴

**Kenma:** kuro u got me feelin some typa way 😻

**Kuroo:** do i need to come back into ur room? 😼

**Kenma:** i think u do 🥴

**Oikawa:** why

**Oikawa:** why are you two doing this when you know i’ll hate you for it

**Kenma:** maybe i want you to hate me tooru

**Oikawa:** rude!!

**Oikawa:** and after i drove to tokyo just to give you hugs!!

**Nishinoya:** when he’s caring 😍

**Oikawa:** ikr 🥰

**Oikawa:** iwa-chan is lucky to have me 🥰

**Iwaizumi:** no i’m not 

**Oikawa:** rude!!

-

**Kuroo:** just ate ass!!!

**Nishinoya:** YESSS!!!!!!

**Asahi:** why do you two hype each other up like this

**-**

**Asahi:** oh yeah i forgot

**Asahi** _ attached image _

**Asahi:** kitten update!!!!!

**Kenma:** SOOOO CUTE OMGGGG 

**Kenma:** KURO LOOK AT HER SHE’S SO BIG

**Kenma:** KURO ARE YOU LOOKING

**Kenma:** SHE’S SO CUTE

**Kenma:** KURO ARE YOU LOOKING???

**Kenma:** YOU GOT HER A COLLAR?

**Kenma:** I’M GOING TO CRY

**Kenma:** KURO

**Kenma:** KURO KURO KURO

**Kenma:** CAN WE PLEASE GET A CAT

**Kuroo:** why did you guys send a pic of her 

**Kuroo:** now i have to deal with this

**Kenma:** kuro please

**Kenma:** please

**Kenma:** i never ask for anything PLEASE

**Kuroo:** no

**Kenma:** i want to break up with you.

**Kuroo:** kenma

**Kenma:** kuro

**Kuroo:** kenma please

**Kenma:** KURO I JUST WANT A CAT

**Nishinoya:** you can have ours

**Asahi:** stop!!!! You love her and you know it!!!!!

**Nishinoya:** no i don’t.

**Asahi:** she sleeps on your chest every night and you let her

**Nishinoya:** she’s cuddling me and who am i to stop her

**Nishinoya:** that doesn’t mean i love her

**Asahi:** you love her

**Kenma:** YOU LOVE HER

**Kenma:** KURO THAT COULD BE US

**Kuroo:** kenma, NO

**Nishinoya** has left the chat


	29. alexander come back to sleep i have an early meeting out of town it's still dark outside i know i just need to write somethign down why do you write like youre running out of time come back to bed that would be enough. ill be back before you know I'm gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: BOKUTO!  
> Bokuto: KUROO
> 
> Kuroo: BOKUTO!
> 
> Lev: KENMA!!!!
> 
> Kenma: lev
> 
> Lev: KENMA!!!

_ can’t u make him in the mood?;);) _

**Kuroo** added  **Bokuto** to the chat

**Kenma:** no

**Kenma** removed  **Bokuto** from the chat

**Kuroo:** kenma why

**Kenma:** you know why

**Kuroo:** ur no fun!!!

-

**Kuroo** added  **Bokuto** to the chat

**Kenma** removed  **Bokuto** from the chat

**Kuroo:** KENMA PLEASE

**Kenma:** NO

**Kenma:** HE’S ANNOYING

**Kuroo:** YOU’RE NO FUN!!

-

**Tanaka** added  **Yamamoto** to the chat

**Kenma** removed  **Yamamoto** to the chat

**Tanaka:** KENMA!!

**Kenma:** I DON’T WANT HIM HERE

**Oikawa:** who said you get to decide who’s in this chat

**Kenma:** I did

**Kenma:** Just now

**Oikawa:** Fair

**Oikawa:** Looks like kenma has spoken.

**Oikawa:** Ohhh nooo you guys can’t add your annoying friends to the chat what a shameeeeee

**Sugawara:** ur lucky that wasn’t a rule before

**Sugawara:** bc if my memory is correct u were one of hinata’s annoying friends that got added

**Oikawa:** i don’t know what you’re talking about

-

**Hinata** added  **Lev** to the chat

**Kenma** removed  **Lev** from the chat

**Hinata:** KENMA!

**Kenma:** I DON’T WANT HIM HERE HE MAKES ME SICK

**Sugawara:** Kenma’s putting his foot down!!!

**Sugawara:** I respect it

**Sugawara:** I don’t think we need more chaotic energy in this groupchat.

**Daichi:** I agree

**Sugawara:** of course you do!

**Sugawara:** can i suck your dick 😍🥰

**Sugawara:** please

**Oikawa:** SUGA

**Kuroo:** you guys are no fun!!!!

**Nishinoya:** BORING YOU GUYS ARE BORING

**Nishinoya:** but YESSS DAICHI

-

**Tanaka:** is kenma here

**Kenma:** yes

-

**Tanaka:** is kenma here

**Kenma:** yes??

-

**Tanaka:** is kenma here

**Kuroo:** no

**Kuroo:** he doesn’t have his phone with him

**Kuroo:** he’s taking a shower 🤤

**Nishinoya:** nice

**Asahi:** yuu stop

**Nishinoya:** why don’t you love me

**Tanaka:** hurry kuroo distract kenma before he comes back to the chat

**Daichi:** what

**Kuroo:** wait why

**Kuroo:** HOW

**Nishinoya:** IDK GET IN THE SHOWER WITH HIM

**Nishinoya:** FUCK HIM 

**Kuroo:** u don’t have to tell me twice 😼

**Sugawara:** what are you guys doing 

**Oikawa:** probably something horrible

**Nishinoya:** idk what you mean

**Nishinoya** added  **Bokuto** to the chat

**Bokuto:** HEY HEY HEY!!!!!!

**Oikawa:** like i said, something horrible.

**Hinata:** BOKUTO!!!

**Bokuto:** HINATA!!!

**Nishinoya:** BOKUTO!!!

**Bokuto:** NISHINOYA!!!!

**Bokuto:** WAIT….

**Bokuto:** SOMEONE IS MISSING....

**Bokuto** added  **Akaashi** to the chat

**Akaashi:** bokuto….

**Bokuto:** PLEASE JUST STAY

**Akaashi:** no

**Bokuto:** PLEASE

**Bokuto:** _ attached image _

**Akaashi:** seriously

**Akaashi:** you think sending a picture of you pouting is going to work?

**Bokuto:** PLEASE

**Akaashi:** …. Fine

**Bokuto:** I’M SO HAPPY I’M GONNA KISS YOU

**Nishinoya:** YAY

**Hinata:** YAY

**Tanaka** added  **Yamamoto** to the chat

**Yamamoto:** WHAT IS THIS

**Tanaka:** WELCOME

**Nishinoya:** YAMAMOTO!!!!!

**Yamamoto:** I DON’T HAVE YOUR NUMBER SAVED!!!!

**Nishinoya:** NISHINOYA!!!

**Yamamoto:** NISHINOYA!!!!!

**Yamaguchi:** tsukki help i’m scared

**Yamaguchi:** i’m shivering me timbers

**Tsukishima:** tadashi please stop talking like that

**Nishinoya:** SHIVERING ME TIMBERS

**Yamamoto** changed the group name to  _ Shivering me timbers _

**Hinata** added  **Lev** to the chat

**Hinata:** LEV!!!!!

**Lev:** HINATA!!!

**Lev:** WHERE’S KENMA?

**Nishinoya:** he’s BUSY 

**Nishinoya:** IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN ;;;)))

**Akaashi:** omg. nice

**Yamamoto:** YESSSS KENMA!!!!!

**Lev:** no kenma 😡

**Bokuto:** WHERE’S KUROO???

**Nishinoya:** BUSY

**Bokuto** added  **Satori** to the chat

**Satori:** WHAT’S THIS????

**Oikawa:** what’s going on

**Oikawa:** WHY ARE THERE SO MANY NEW NUMBERS IN HERE

**Oikawa:** I DON’T HAVE ANY OF YOU SAVED

**Satori:** OIKAWA TOORU ??????

**Oikawa:** WHO ARE YOU

**Iwaizumi:** Who’s asking?

**Sugawara:** jealous, iwaizumi?

**Satori:** You don’t have my number saved Oikawa? I’m HEART BROKEN

**Satori:** i’m the love of your LIFE!!!

**Iwaizumi:** So, me?

**Iwaizumi:** Iwaizumi Hajime?

**Oikawa:** wait

**Oikawa:** satori?

**Oikawa:** ew

**Iwaizumi:** Why did you know who he was because of that?

**Oikawa:** lmaoooo iwa-chan

**Oikawa:** calm down, don’t get jealous

**Satori:** or do;) we are competing for your love, after all

**Oikawa:** No.

**Bokuto:** I MISS KUROO

**Lev:** I MISS KENMA

**Yamamoto:** TANAKA!

**Tanaka:** YAMAMOTO!

**Satori:** OIKAWA!

**Oikawa:** why me?

**Satori:** Sorry, you’re just so much fun!

**Iwaizumi:** no, he isn’t

**Sugawara:** LMAO 

**Kenma:** why is my phone blowing uo

**Kenma:** what the fuck

**Kenma:** i hate you guys

**Kuroo:** BOKUTO!

**Bokuto:** KUROO

**Kuroo:** BOKUTO!

**Lev:** KENMA!!!!

**Kenma:** lev

**Lev:** KENMA!!!

**Kenma:** why are you here

**Lev:** ur so cute!

**Lev:** I missed u!

**Kuroo** removed  **Lev** from the chat

**Bokuto:** AHAHAHA KUROO

**Kuroo:** he doesn’t need to be talking to kenma like that

**Kenma:** amazing

**Hinata:** LEV 💔

**Yamamoto:** LEV 💔

**Kenma:** kuro it’s so scary in here why did you do this to me

**Kuroo:** i literally didn’t add any of them

**Kenma:** kuro it’s so scary in here why did you do this to me

**Kenma** removed  **Yamamoto** from the chat

**Tanaka:** YAMAMOTO!!!!!!

**Satori:** it’s ok

**Satori:** i’m here 

**Iwaizumi** removed  **Satori** from the chat

**Oikawa:** AHAHA IWA-CHAN

**Sugawara:** thank god

**Tsukishima:** i have a headache from all of you idiots

**Kuroo:** bokuto i miss you

**Kuroo:** why did you go quiet :( :(

**Bokuto:** I’M SCARED 

**Bokuto:** I DON’T WANT TO BE REMOVED

**Bokuto:** KENMA PLEASE

**Kenma:** fine

**Bokuto:** YESSSS

**Kuroo:** YESSSS

**Kuroo:** BOKUTO GUESS WHAT I JUST ATE ;)

**Bokuto:** YESSSSSS

**Nishinoya:** YESSS

**Akaashi:** Oooh nice, Kenma

**Kenma:** 😌

**Kuroo:** what

**Kuroo:** my kenma

**Kuroo:** willingly talking about getting his ass eaten???

**Oikawa:** kuroo why are you obsessed with ass eating

**Oikawa:** it’s disgusting

**Oikawa:** it’s just as disgusting as sugawara being so passionate about throat fucking

**Sugawara:** what can i say? I love what i do

**Tsukishima:** you’re all freaks and i don’t want to be in this chat anymore

**Bokuto:** yeah but i’m here so obviously that makes it better right

**Tsukishima:** no

**Bokuto:** :( 

**Kageyama:** give him a nose

**Bokuto:** ok

**Bokuto:** :-(

**Oikawa:** why would you listen to him?

**Kageyama:** it’s cute

**Bokuto:** :-)

**Oikawa:** ugh

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Bokuto:** KUROO I THINK I LIKE HIM

**Kuroo:** YES BOKUTO ME TOO

**Kuroo:** WE’RE BEST FRIENDS

**Bokuto:** UNKNOWN NUMBER BE MY BEST FRIEND

**Tsukishima:** you’ve been in this chat how many times and still don’t have all of the numbers saved?

**Bokuto:** NO ONE TELLS ME ANYTHING WHEN I’M HERE

**Kageyama:** it’s kageyama. And sure :-)

**Hinata:** stop making friends in front of me 

**Oikawa:** shouyou why are you jealous

**Hinata:** he’s giving them so much more attention than me 😔

**Kageyama:** sorry. Should i come over?

**Hinata:** yes!!!!

**Bokuto:** SORRY HINATA I’M BEST FRIENDS WITH HIM NOW

**Kuroo:** ME TOO

**Bokuto:** BEST FRIEND TWINS BEST FRIEND TWINS

**Kenma:** this is why i never want you in the chat

**Bokuto:** :-(


	30. Well I'll be damned well I'll be damned. Hamilton's on your side. Well I'll be damned well I'll be damned. And? You won in a land slide.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: Why is it suddenly not about me anymore
> 
> Sugawara: Because no one cares
> 
> Nishinoya: SUGA LMAO
> 
> Oikawa: Whatever, Iwa-chan is here to pay attention to me
> 
> Oikawa: I hate all of you 😍

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  **Confessions**

**Oikawa:** Forgive me father for I have sinned

**Nishinoya:** You’re a Catholic?

**Oikawa:** No, I’m a sinner

**Sugawara:** What happened?

**Sugawara:** Did you finally get your throat fucked by Iwaizumi? You feel like you’ve sinned?

**Iwaizumi: “** Finally” he says as if it hasn’t happened before

**Sugawara:** Omg OMGOMG

**Nishinoya:** NICE

**Oikawa:** HAJIME

**Yamaguchi:** What actually happened?

**Oikawa:** I have SINNED

**Oikawa:** I AM ALLERGIC TO GUAVA

**Oikawa:** A SIN

**Iwaizumi:** Thou shalt not have any strange gods before me

**Iwaizumi:** Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image

**Iwaizumi:** Thou shalt not be allergic to guava

**Sugawara:** I wouldn’t call you a sinner

**Sugawara:** just a loser 😋

**Iwaizumi:** But actually Oikawa, are you okay?

**Oikawa:** Yes. BUT IM SOBBING

**Oikawa:** My throat and tongue are so itchy and I think I’m breaking out

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll bring you some tea and allergy medicine?

**Oikawa:** I don’t think I need medicine but I’ll take some tea 💗 The door will be unlocked 🥺 thank you

**Yamaguchi:** But it’s just guava

**Oikawa:** I don’t think you understand my love for guava

**Yamaguchi:** It’s not my favorite fruit

**Oikawa:** It’s not mine either lol

**Oikawa:** BUT IT’S STILL GOOD

**Oikawa:** What if I wake up tomorrow and I’m allergic to persimmons 

**Oikawa:** Or honeydew

**Sugawara:** Just avoid guava

**Oikawa:** WHAT AM I GONNA DRINK IN THE SUMMER

**Yamaguchi:** Anything but drinks including guava?

**Oikawa:** NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME HERE

**Kageyama:** Hope you feel better

**Oikawa:** gross

**Iwaizumi:** Say thank you, idiot

**Oikawa:** gross

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa

**Oikawa:** Don’t tell me what to do

**Iwaizumi:** We’re not cuddling today

**Oikawa:** NO

**Oikawa:** Thank you Tobio

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Oikawa:** Ew he’s smiling at me

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA SMILE AT ME

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Sugawara:** Why don’t you use emojis?

**Kageyama:** I do, but I just think he’s cute

**Oikawa:** He?

**Kageyama:** yes, him :-)

**Kageyama:** He’s cute

**Hinata:** ur cute

**Kageyama:** no you are

**Hinata:** no u r

**Kageyama:** shut up you are

**Hinata:** ur literally so cute Kageyama shut up

**Tsukishima:** You’re both ugly

**Kageyama:** :-(

**Kuroo:** DON’T MAKE HIM SAD

**Kenma:** DON’T INTERRUPT THEM WHEN THEY’RE BEING CUTE

**Tsukishima:** Don’t tell me what to do

**Oikawa:** This was about me

**Oikawa:** Why is it suddenly not about me anymore

**Sugawara:** Because no one cares

**Nishinoya:** SUGA LMAO

**Oikawa:** Whatever, Iwa-chan is here to pay attention to me

**Oikawa:** I hate all of you 😍

**Yamaguchi:** LMAO

-

**Daichi** changed the group name to  **Suga doesn’t love me**

**Kuroo:** Oh?

**Daichi:** 😔

**Iwaizumi:** What happened

**Daichi:** He won’t stop playing tetris

**Daichi:** He came to my house to use my switch to play tetris

**Daichi:** We’re just like, laying here

**Daichi:** And he’s like playing tetris on my chest

**Daichi:** AND HE WANTS ME TO PUT MY PHONE DOWN BECAUSE I’M NOT PAYING ATTENTION TO HIM

**Kuroo:** lmao that’s like Kenma

**Kenma:** Stop

**Kuroo:** It’s cute

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  **Suga loves Daichi so much**

**Daichi** changed the group name to  **Daichi loves suga the most**

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  **Suga wants a kiss**

**Asahi:** This is just happening

**Daichi** changed the group name to  **Stay out of this Asahi**

**Asahi** changed the group name to  **This is a group chat, I can do what I want**

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  **Daichi pay attention to me**

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  **Daichi pay attention to ME**

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  **Kuroo FUCK OFF**

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  **Sugawara, don’t be rude**

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  **Daichi take care of my needs 😉**

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  **Daichi fucks?**

**Sugawara:** He’s about to 😋

**Tanaka** changed the group name to  **DAICHI FUCKS**

**Nishinoya:** YES DAICHI FUCKS NICE DAICH HAHA

**Asahi:** stop being weird

**Oikawa:** Suga was just playing tetris, why is he horny?

**Kuroo:** Is Suga ever not horny? That’s the better question

-

**Hinata:** retailtherapyretailtherapyretailtherapy

**Kenma:** no

**Hinata:** retail therapy

**Kageyama:** yes

**Kenma:** what

**Kageyama:** it makes him feel better

**Kenma:** he will be broke

**Hinata:** broke and happy

**Hinata:** Wait kenma

**Hinata:** what if I customize a shirt with me and Kageyama on it. And I give one to you and one to Kuroo

**Hinata:** Hilarious

**Hinata:** add to cart

**Kenma:** You’re a monster

**Kenma:** Kageyama please review his orders before he buys things omg

**Kageyama:** lmao of course

**Hinata:** I want a shirt with Kageyama’s face on it

**Kageyama:** you dont

**Hinata:** I do

**Kageyama:** you dont

**Hinata:** Add to cart

**Kenma:** freak

**Hinata:** sorry that I love my boyfriend

**Hinata:** sorry not sorry

**Kenma:** Why would you say that what ew that’s such a dead phrase

**Hinata:** #sorrynotsorry

**Oikawa:** A new form of ugly 

**Iwaizumi:** do you guys ever think about Kageyama

**Hinata:** always

**Oikawa:** only when I really have to

**Kuroo:** always

**Kenma:** stop trying to steal boyfriends Kuro

**Kageyama:** What does this mean

**Iwaizumi:** Like, you know how to do makeup and hair and you can bake

**Iwaizumi:** and you’re like good at volleyball

**Iwaizumi:** It’s just unexpected and I think about it a lot

**Oikawa:** Think about me instead wtf

**Oikawa:** Do you hate me or something?

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t

**Oikawa:** I think you do

**Iwaizumi:** I think you’re dramatic

**Oikawa:** I think I’m reasonable

**Iwaizumi:** I think you’re an idiot

**Oikawa:** Well I think you’re handsome

**Iwaizumi:** Well I think you are too

**Nishinoya:** Kageyama is so dreamy what

**Kuroo:** Husband material 😤🥵🥵


	31. I’ve been reading common sense by Thomas Paine. Some men say I’m intense or I’m insane. You want a revolution, I want a revelation so listen to my declaration. “We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal” and when I meet Thomas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daichi: I’ll be back Sunday night 😚  
> Sugawara: 😚 Absence makes the heart grow fonder
> 
> Asahi: suga that is literally only two days
> 
> Sugawara: absence makes the heart grow fonder Asahi. I don’t know what you want from me

_ DAICHI FUCKS _

**Kenma:** I had the WORST dream last night

**Kenma:** We were all going somewhere idk and like it was pouring out and like we all took turns grabbing our jackets because whatever

**Kenma:** And it was finally my turn to grab mine and everyone started yelling at me that I wont neef mine

**Kenma:** And I was yellinh back because it’s POURING but we left anyways and I wss soaking wet and Lev gave me his jacket and took another one for himself

**Kenma:** Long story short, what you guys did was unforgivable and idk how you’re going to make up for it

**Kuroo:** is that why you were being so mean today?

**Kenma:** I wasnt being meen?

**Kageyama:** meen

**Oikawa:** how did you spell that wrong when he literally wrote it above like what

**Kuroo:** you didn’t hug me today!

**Kuroo:** THATS MEAN

**Kenma:** I let you hug me while I played Mario Kart

**Kuroo:** I need all your attention

**Kuroo:** therefore what you did was unforgivable and idk how you’re gonna make up for it

**Nishinoya:** omg kenma suck his dick and he’ll forgive you

**Oikawa:** noya is a real person AHHHA HE'S JUST OUT HERE

**Kuroo:** yeah kenma, suck my dick and I’ll forgive you

**Kenma:** okay but you made me walk IN THE POURING RAIN ABD I EAS SOAKING WET

**Kuroo:** IN A DREAM

**Kenma:** IT WAS STILL YOU

**Nishinoya:** omg Kuroo eat his ass and he’ll forgive you

**Kenma:** Kuro eat my ass and I’ll forgive you

**Kuroo:** bbg 😍😍 I’ll be back at your place later tonight

**Nishinoya:** YES 

**Nishinoya:** NICE KUROO AND KENMA NICE

**Asahi:** would you stop that

**Nishinoya:** I’m a couples counselor

**Sugawara:** Do you guys ever just wanna kiss Daichi?

**Sugawara:** because I do

**Kuroo:** yes

**Sugawara:** wut

**Oikawa:** Sometimes

**Sugawara:** WUT

**Iwaizumi:** …

**Iwaizumi:** what

**Tanaka:** Yes always 🥵🥰🥵🥰🥺🥺😤😳🥵😎😍

**Sugawara:** STOP NO

**Sugawara:** WHY DO YOU GUYS WANT TO KISS HIM WHAT THE FUCK

**Sugawara:** I was gonna talk about how much I want to kiss him because I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND BUT WHAT IS HAPPENING OIKAWA AND KUROO NEVER LOOK AT DAICHI AGAIN

**Daichi:** I’ll be back Sunday night 😚

**Sugawara:** 😚 Absence makes the heart grow fonder

**Asahi:** suga that is literally only two days

**Sugawara:** absence makes the heart grow fonder Asahi. I don’t know what you want from me

**Kenma:** where is daichi going?

**Sugawara:** to visit his family for the weekend

**Sugawara:** and tomorrow his family is having dinner with

**Sugawara:** the Michimiyas teehee 🙃 

**Daichi:** Suga, I invited you to come with me

**Sugawara:** I don’t want your mom to think I’m clingy

**Daichi:** she already knows you’re clingy lol

**Sugawara:** STOP STOP STOP THATS EMBARRASSING DAICHI WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME THAT

**Daichi:** it’s cute lol

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki’s parents know I’m clingy, but they also know that Tsukki is the exact same way

**Tsukishima:** shut up shut up

**Tsukishima:** don’t embarrass me

**Yamaguchi:** sorry❤️

**Nishinoya:** you guys are childhood friends so it makes sense

**Nishinoya:** wait do you think Kageyama is clingy

**Tsukishima:** he’s not

**Tsukishima:** sometimes he’ll forget to text Hinata

**Yamaguchi:** OMG THAT ONE TIME HINATA REPLIED SO FAST AND SAID HE WAS WAITING ALL DAY

**Oikawa:** omg I would cry if iwa-Chan didn’t text me all day

**Kageyama:** I don’t use my phone that much, it was an accident

**Hinata:** 💔💔💔💔

**Kageyama:** stop that

**Hinata: 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔**

**Kageyama:** IDIOT STOP, IM OMW TO YOUR PLACE

**Hinata: 🥰🥰🥰**

**Sugawara:** when was this about you two

**Sugawara:** it’s supposed to be about me and Daichi

**Iwaizumi:** when did you become an attention whore like Oikawa

**Oikawa:** Rude iwa-chan!! ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´Д｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡

**Sugawara:** when Daichi went home and I was lacking attention ✨✨🦋🌸💖

**Kuroo:** imagine being lonely as fuck

**Sugawara:** imagine being salty because your boyfriend didn’t hug you

**Kuroo:** imagine saying something so uncalled for

**Sugawara:** imagine me hating you

**Kuroo:** imagine me being in love with your boyfriend

**Sugawara:** imagine me kicking your ass

**Kuroo:** imagine me laughing because you’re small and can’t do shit

**Sugawara:** imagine me blocking your number 😘

**Kuroo:** imagine your boyfriend spending the weekend with a girl who likes him while you sit at home

**Sugawara** left the group

**Daichi** added  **Sugawara** to the group

**Daichi:** Kuroo stop that

**Kuroo:** yes daddy 😍🤪😚🥵🥵🥵💦💦

**Sugawara** left the group

**Kenma** added  **Sugawara** to the group

**Kenma:** Kuro, stop you fucker

**Kuroo:** yes bbg 🥰

**Sugawara:** I’m the nicest bitch here

**Sugawara:** I don’t deserve this

**Kuroo:** I’m nice

**Oikawa:** no

**Daichi:** no

**Kageyama:** you’re nice

**Kuroo:** my man!!!

**Sugawara:** Do not go against me Tobio

**Kageyama:** sorry Kuroo

**Kuroo:** 😦

**Hinata:** ahem

**Kuroo: 😧**

-

**Sugawara:** Daichi is back 😤😤

**Sugawara:** I do be hugging him

**Kuroo:** Daichi come hug me

**Sugawara:** Daichi no

**Kenma:** Daichi NO

**Oikawa:** Daichi come hug me!! ✨

**Iwaizumi:** Daichi stay where you are

**Kuroo:** no Daichi come here

**Sugawara:** leave my husband alone🤬🤬

**Kageyama:** leave my dad alone

**Tanaka:** Daichi my king😳😳😤😍😍 come hug me🥺

**Daichi:** why are you guys like this

**Oikawa:** Daichi is one of the most handsome men here

**Oikawa:** after Iwa-Chan

**Kuroo:** kenma, am I more handsome than Daichi?

**Kenma:** u wish

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Asahi:** how was your family weekend?

**Daichi:** it felt nice being at home for a little bit haha

**Sugawara: ❤️❤️**

**Kuroo:** how was that dinner with the michimiya family?

**Sugawara:** do you hate me or something 🙃

**Daichi:** it was fun. Yui is actually transferring up here soon 

**Sugawara:** 🙃

**Sugawara** left the chat


	32. mom i'm so sorry for forgetting what you taught me my son you taught me piano i taught you piano you would put your hands on mine you changed the melody everytime i would always change the line shhh i know i know i would always change the line i know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi: shouyou and i are ADULTS i think we know when someone is hitting on us
> 
> Kageyama: no you don’t because you’re both stupid

_ DAICHI FUCKS _

**Hinata:** can someone tell kageyama that he’s being dramatic

**Kuroo:** i think i need context

**Kuroo:** my man would never

**Nishinoya:** i agree with kuroo

**Kuroo:** i stand with kageyama 😌🤚🏻

**Nishinoya:** hell yeah 😌

**Oikawa:** tobio you’re being dramatic and you’re stupid

**Hinata:** thanks tooru

**Kenma:** what did he do?

**Hinata:** he’s being petty for no reason

**Kageyama:** i am NOT being petty for no reason

**Yamaguchi:** you are

**Kageyama:** I’M NOT

**Tsukishima:** he’s not.

**Yamaguchi:** kei, you’re doing it too so shut up

**Daichi:** woah a double argument

**Sugawara:** double whammy heart eyes

**Sugawara:** but like lol what’s happening

**Hinata:** yamaguchi and i were just hanging out right

**Oikawa:** yeah go on

**Hinata:** and these two girls came up to us and started talking to us which ISN’T A BIG DEAL

**Sugawara:** umm….

**Hinata:** and we were talking for like two hours so they gave us their numbers and asked us to hang out another time!

**Yamaguchi:** which we’re doing on saturday

**Kageyama:** no you aren’t.

**Tsukishima:** you’re not going

**Hinata:** and they’re being dramatic

**Hinata:** because they think they’re into us

**Yamaguchi:** shouyou and i are ADULTS i think we know when someone is hitting on us

**Kageyama:** no you don’t because you’re both stupid

**Tsukishima:** they’re into you. Don’t go.

**Oikawa:** lololol

**Sugawara:** was there like… suggestive conversation?

**Hinata:** NO

**Kageyama:** YES THERE WAS

**Hinata:** YOU WEREN’T EVEN THERE

**Kageyama:** i don’t need to be there to know they were flirting with you

**Kageyama:** you’re just an idiot and never realize when people are flirting with you

**Hinata:** that isn’t true

**Kageyama:** shouyou i flirted with you for TWO YEARS before we dated

**Hinata:** no you didn’t

**Tsukishima:** yes he did

**Tsukishima:** i don’t think you guys should go.

**Yamaguchi:** we’re going. It’s not a big deal

**Kageyama:** fine.

**Tsukishima:** Whatever. Fine.

**Sugawara:** well

**Sugawara:** this isn’t awkward

-

**Kuroo:** guys

**Kenma:** shut up

**Kenma:** i’m upset and you’re laughing at me

**Oikawa:** ur upset??? why what happened where are you

**Kuroo:** lol

**Kuroo:** guys

**Kuroo:** guess what kenma just did

**Kenma:** shut up

**Oikawa:** well??

**Daichi:** it’s been ten minutes are you going to tell us

**Sugawara:** i guess kenma killed him

**Nishinoya:** nooooo my man 💔

-

**Kuroo:** sorry

**Kuroo:** kenma had a bad day

**Kuroo:** and this manga that he’s reading got updated and he started reading it

**Kuroo:** and i think the main couple broke up??

**Kuroo:** AND HE STARTED SOBBING?

**Kenma:** shut up I was upset

**Kuroo:** kenma you were crying so hard 

**Kuroo:** u couldn’t breathe

**Kuroo:** over a manga couple

**Kenma:** THEY GOT INTO AN ARGUMENT

**Kuroo:** THEY DIDN’T EVEN BREAK UP?

**Kenma:** NO BUT STILL

**Oikawa:** kuroo why did it take you thirty minutes to tell this story

**Kuroo:** he was so upset i had to comfort him

**Asahi:** awww

**Nishinoya:** when he’s a good boyfriend 🥺😍

**Akaashi:** Lol Kenma

**Akaashi:** Kuroo you’re a horrible boyfriend why are you telling the groupchat about his breakdown

**Kuroo:** so what you’re telling me is you hate me and want me to die

**Akaashi:** I’m not anti-Kuroo i’m just pro-Kenma 💛

**Kenma:** at least SOMEONE cares about my wellbeing 

**Kuroo:** IS AKAASHI THE ONE HUGGING YOU RIGHT NOW???

**Kuroo:** IS AKAASHI THE ONE WHO JUST MADE YOU YOUR FAVORITE FOOD AND LET YOU CRAWL INTO HIS HOODIE WITH HIM????

**Akaashi:** Do you want to get desert when we hang out later?

**Kenma:** yes

**Kuroo:** SO YOU’RE JUST IGNORING ME?

**Akaashi:** Can we go to the one place that makes my favorite pies?

**Kenma:** ooooooh yes we haven’t gone there in so long

**Asahi:** why are you guys making plans in front of us

**Sugawara:** right in front of our eyes

**Bokuto:** wait wait you guys hang out??

**Kuroo:** ?yeah um????!!!!!!!! 

**Akaashi:** we literally hang out all the time

**Kuroo:** bokuto look at our boys

**Bokuto:** i’m crying

**Akaashi:** what

**Akaashi:** WHY ARE YOU ACTUALLY CRYING?

**Bokuto:** I’M JUST

**Akaashi:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** BOKUTO YOU IDIOT AHAHAHA

**Oikawa:** WHY ARE YOU CRYING

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA

**Kenma:** bokuto this is why i always kick you out of the chat

-

**Oikawa:** so… it’s saturday

**Iwaizumi:** tooru, don’t

**Oikawa:** how’s that date going?

**Hinata:** it’s not a date

**Hinata:** because they aren’t interested in us

**Yamaguchi:** tsukki wanted to come, and he introduced himself as my boyfriend and won’t let go of my hand

**Yamaguchi:** it’s kind of embarrassing but also.. Sweet

**Kuroo:** yesss tsukki assert your dominance!!! 

**Bokuto:** sexyyy

**Sugawara:** LMAO REALLY

**Daichi:** tsukishima don’t you think that’s a little petty?

**Tsukishima:** i don’t know what you’re talking about.

**Kageyama:** well i’m sitting at home.

**Hinata:** brooding

**Kageyama:** yeah.

**Kageyama:** because i’m sitting at home and you’re hanging out with some girl who’s interested in you.

**Sugawara:** jealous, kageyama?

**Kuroo:** u sure u can talk about jealousy, sugawara?

**Sugawara:** i don’t know what you’re talking about.

**Kuroo:** daichi how’s yui doing?

**Sugawara:** we’re talking about KAGEYAMA, kuroo. Not me

**Kenma:** kuro stop trying to get a rise out of him

**Kenma:** put your phone down i want to lay on you

**Kuroo:** yes kitten 😻

**Oikawa:** gross

**Daichi:** hinata keep us updated on your not date

**Hinata:** there’s nothing to update you on because we’re literally just all friends!

**Kageyama:** whatever, idiot.

-

**Hinata:** um

**Kageyama:** yes?

**Hinata:** yamaguchi’s leaving

**Oikawa:** is the other girl leaving too?

**Hinata:** no…

**Kageyama:** hm 

**Kageyama:** sounds like they both think you’re cute

**Kageyama:** and now they’re both gonna flirt with you

**Hinata:** would you stop

**Oikawa:** hmm

-

**Hinata:** so 

**Hinata:** kageyama do you want to come get me?

**Kageyama:** omw

**Sugawara:** lmfao

**Sugawara:** hinata you’re an idiot

**Hinata:** i tried to believe in them i tried 😭

**Nishinoya:** well

**Nishinoya:** at least you can say that u can still get pussy if you wanted to 🤪

**Tanaka:** word bro 

**Asahi:** stop it

**Kuroo:** kageyama is gonna come after u two next 😳

-

**Hinata:** kageyama found me and kissed me in front of them

**Hinata:** i’m so embarrassed

**Hinata:** i want to die

**Kageyama:** lol

**Sugawara:** daichi why is our son so petty?

**Daichi:** i’m sure he gets it from you


	33. The birds chirping outside of my window but I live with it now because I had to accept it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tanaka: SOULMATES SOULMATES SOULMATES
> 
> Nishinoya: SOULMATES SOULMATES SOULMATES
> 
> Tanaka: Sorry Asahi 😎
> 
> Asahi: aw shucks 

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ Daichi has a$$ _

**Sugawara:** _ attached video. _

**Sugawara:** Daichi now knows how to throw it back

**Daichi:** KOUSHI

**Sugawara: 😋**

**Kuroo:** first name first name first name

**Kuroo:** Also, why does Daichi have so much ass?

**Sugawara:** Don’t look at him

**Kuroo:** Daichi date me

**Sugawara:** Kuroo you can leave

**Kuroo:** Daichi you can date me

**Kenma:** Kuroo you can leave

**Daichi:** Suga you did this

**Oikawa:** Daichi 🥴

**Oikawa:** That video is about to make me act up

**Iwaizumi:** Stop that

**Sugawara:** STOP THAT

**Sugawara:** I WANT TO SHOW OFF MY BOYF BUT I CANNOT

**Kuroo:** Keep showing him off 🤤

**Oikawa:** Don’t stop now 

**Sugawara:** I thought this was a safe place

**Kuroo:** I’ll take care of Daichi 🥵

**Sugawara:** LEAVE MY DAICHI ALONE

**Bokuto:** Daichi 🥰

**Sugawara:** No NO NO

**Akaashi:** Stop…

**Tanaka:** Daddy 😫 

**Tanaka:** Daichi* 😳 oops how did that happen so weird

**Sugawara:** I hate you all

**Daichi:** I feel

**Daichi:** violated

**Sugawara:** Daichiiiii

**Kenma:** treat Daichi with respect everyone

**Kenma:** even though he’s the hottest guy here we have to respect him

**Sugawara:** 😤

**Kuroo:** 😤

**Kuroo:** WAIT KENMA WHAT

**Kemna:** 💋

**Sugawara:** So have we all agreed to leave Daichi alone?

**Kuroo:** Yes

**Kuroo:** For now

**Sugawara:** good enough

**Sugawara:** Daichi I need attention and you aren’t giving me any

**Daichi:** sorry sorry sorry 

**Daichi:** 😚

**Sugawara:** 😚

**Bokuto:** What is that

**Iwaizumi:** A text kiss

**Bokuto:** Akaashi, we should text kiss 

**Akaashi:** We should not.

-

**Hinata:** Put a finger down if all you want is your Kageyama’s attention but he hangs out with Tsukishima more than you so you can’t have any

**Kenma:** Wow that’s so relatable

**Kenma:** Definitely not something just happening to you

**Hinata:** Kageyama hates me

**Hinata:** Kageyama doesn’t love me anymore 

**Kenma:** Idk why

**Kenma:** But I can tell you’re being dramatic

**Oikawa:** Wow break up with Kageyama 

**Oikawa:** Break his heart lol

**Iwaizumi:** no

**Oikawa:** Yes

**Iwaizumi:** No idiot

**Oikawa:** Wow, you didn’t have to call me an idiot 

**Iwaizumi:** You’re an idiot so I don’t see a problem

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan hates me 💔

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan doesn’t love me anymore

**Kenma:** u both are being so scary right now

**Kenma:** I hate it

**Kageyama:** What are you going on about

**Hinata:** You’d know if you paid more attention to me and NOT TSUKISHIMA

**Kageyama:** You’re insane

**Tsukishima:** You’re insane Hinata

**Hinata:** I’m not insane, I’m heartbroken.

**Kageyama:** Whatever, are you still coming over for dinner?

**Hinata:** YES

**-**

**Tanaka:** I WAS ON TIKTOK

**Tanaka:** AND YOU KNOW THE AUDIO THAT PLAYS AND ITS LIKE YOUR SOULMATE WILL TEXT YOU WHEN YOU LISTEN TO IT

**Tanaka:** NOYA TEXTED ME AHAH

**Tanaka:** WE’RE SOULMATES

**Nishinoya:** WBK WBK WBK WBK WBK

**Tanaka:** SOULMATES SOULMATES SOULMATES

**Nishinoya:** SOULMATES SOULMATES SOULMATES

**Tanaka:** Sorry Asahi 😎

**Asahi:** aw shucks 

**Nishinoya:** We should text kiss like daichi and suga LMAOOOO

**Sugawara:** Don’t make fun of us

**Daichi:** We’re cute

**Sugawara:** Wow i wanna suck your dick

**Daichi:** Suga, not in the groupchat

**Akaashi:** I love your energy Sugawara

**Akaashi:** It gives me a rush

**Sugawara:** 💗

**Akaashi:** 💗

**Bokuto:** OMG AKAASHI IS MAKING FRIENDS

**Bokuto:** THIS IS GREAT THIS IS GOOD DAICHI WE’RE FRIENDS NOW

**Bokuto:** DAICHI MY BEST FRIEND WHERE ARE YOU

**Akaashi:** I think he’s busy

**Bokuto:** oooooh

**-**

**Kuroo:** I CANNOT BREATHE GUYS GUYS

**Kenma:** You’re nothing to me

**Kuroo:** HAHAH GUYS OMGOMGOMOMG LISTEN TO ME AHAH

**Kuroo:** ME NAD KENMA WERE WALKING TO STARBUCKS AND HE WAS SO SCARED OF STEPPING ON ICE AND THERE WAS AN UNAVOIDABLE PATCH

**Kuroo:** LIKE THERE WAS NO GOING AROUND IT

**Kuroo:** AND HE LIKE SLIPPED

**Kuroo:** CAUGHT HIMSELF

**Kuroo:** AND THEN HE SLIPPED AGAIN BUT DIDN’T STOP

**Kuroo:** LIKE HE WAS SLIPPING FOR 10000 YEARS

**Kuroo:** BUT LIKE HE WAS GOING IN A WEIRD DIAGONAL DIRECTION FOREVER

**Kuroo:** But then he was laughing and crying and then sobbing and then I felt bad

**Kuroo:** But we couldn’t stop laughing and he was scared but I was scared too

**Kuroo:** lol

**Kuroo:** Good times am I right?

**Kenma:** Im traumatized

**Kenma:** ur laughinf at my trauma

**Akaashi:** Are you okay?

**Sugawara:** Did you get hurt?

**Kenma:** I’m fine, just

**Kenma:** Scared

**Kenma:** I don’t want to leave the house ever

**Kuroo:** NOOOO

**Kuroo:** I’ll carry you everywhere bbg

**Kenma:** I’d rather slip and break my neck

**Kuroo:** Love me

**Kenma:** I could never love a freak

**Kuroo:** I’ll carry you bridal style everywhere 😍

**Kuroo:** couple goalzzzzz

**Kenma:** You will not

**Kenma:** Don’t come to my house ever again

**Kenma:** You aren’t welcome here anymore

**Kuroo:** bb let me help

**Kuroo:** Let me nurse you back to health

**Kenma:** You can start by buying me an iced coffee

**Kuroo:** You just had one though

**Kenma:** You can start by buying me an iced coffee


	34. when I'm a closeted Zuko stan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi: But you love me? 🥺
> 
> Tsukishima: ❤️
> 
> Yamaguchi: ❤️

_ Daichi has a$$ _

**Bokuto:** Akaashi

**Akaashi:** Bokuto 

**Bokuto:** Are you coming over?

**Akaashi:** yes, I’m just getting ready

**Bokuto:** 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

**Asahi:** when the groupchat is the perfect place to make plans heart eyes

**Kuroo:** can I come too?

**Bokuto:** NO

**Kuroo:** Um wow okay you can just hate me I guess

**Bokuto:** this is me and Akaashi time

**Nishinoya:** oh?

**Bokuto:** Akaashi hurryyyyyyyy

**Akaashi:** You can just come over instead?

**Bokuto:** 🥰🥰 see you in a little!!!

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ hopefully Bokuto Fucks _

**Asahi:** stop being weird

**Nishinoya:** I’m being hopeful stop being mean

**Nishinoya:** I just thought of something funny

**Nishinoya:** ASSahi

**Kuroo:** wow so original

**Asahi:** lmao Noya

**Sugawara:** that was so new wow

**Asahi:** guys stop he’s cute

**Nishinoya:** Asahi? More like my effing soulmate

**Asahi:** cutie

**Sugawara:** Effing

**Kageyama:** Effing

**Tsukishima:** Effing

**Oikawa:** EFFING AHHAAH GROW UP

**Nishinoya:** I’m a year younger than you

**Oikawa:** And somehow still so much shorter than me

**Hinata:** AHAHAHAH

**Oikawa:** I wouldn’t laugh if I were you

**Yamaguchi:** imagine being SHORT HAHA

**Tsukishima:** you don’t have to imagine Yamaguchi

**Yamaguchi:** So this is how you’re breaking up with me??? OVER TEXT

**Yamaguchi:** after everything we’ve been through?

**Yamaguchi:** AFTER EVERYTHING I GAVE UP FOR YOU

**Yamaguchi:** NOW YOU’RE IGNORING ME

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki 💔💔💔

**Tsukishima:** You’re so dramatic all the time

**Yamaguchi:** But you love me? 🥺

**Tsukishima:** ❤️

**Yamaguchi:** ❤️

**Kageyama:** Gross

**Yamaguchi:** GrOSs

**Tsukishima:** Lmao

-

**Bokuto:** nEVER AGAIN AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** group chat

**Bokuto:** NEVER AGAIN WHY IS YOUR BED LOUD

**Akaashi:** Group Chat Bokuto

**Bokuto:** NEXT TIME, WE’RE GOING TO MY PLACE

**Bokuto:** WHERE MY BED IS QUIET AND YOU CAN STEAL CLOTHES I DON’T NEED TO WEAR BACK HOME

**Bokuto:** I HAD TO FIGHT FOR MY HOODIE

**Kuroo:** Oh?

**Akaashi:** GROUP CHAT 

**Nishinoya:** YES NICE BOKUTO

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Bokuto FUCKS 😎 _

**Kenma:** Why is this happening

**Akaashi:** In the group chat too. Please read my messages next time Bokuto

**Kuroo:** Next time 😳

**Sugawara:** Next time 🥴

**Bokuto:** OMG THIS IS THE GROUP CHAT AKAASHI IM SORRY

**Akaashi:** The damage has been done

**Nishinoya:** It’s okay, we’ve talked about worse in here 😳😳😳😳

**Kuroo:** Ass eating?

**Bokuto:** Ass eating 🤤

**Sugawara:** MORE HORNY PEOPLE IN THE CHAT 🥵 WE LOVE TO SEE IT

**Tanaka:** one of us one of us one of us

**Kuroo:** YES

**Bokuto:** RIGHT????

**Kenma:** Welcome to my life 😜

**Akaashi:** I don’t know what to say

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI I LOVE YOU SO MUCH FORGIVE ME

**Oikawa:** Bokuto, you disgust me

**Bokuto:** Ah, so you’ve discussed me. I’m a trust fund, baby, you can trust me.

**Sugawara:** HAMILTON AND HORNY YES BOKUTO

**Akaashi:** My king 

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI

**Kageyama:** I’ve been reading Common Sense by Thomas Paine, some men say that I’m intense or I’m insane

**Akaashi:** My real king

**Kuroo:** Kageyama 😍

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI NO 

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Daichi:** It’s always Hamilton

**Kenma:** I know like why please Kuroo will never stop

**Kenma:** He’s a maniac

**Kuroo:** A talented maniac with great legs

**Kenma:** A talented maniac with decent legs I guess

**Kuroo:** Love me please bbg

**Kenma:** I’ll think about it

**Sugawara:** Lol 

**Kuroo:** Why do you hate me

**Sugawara:** BECAUSE YOU ALWAYS TALK ABOUT DAICHI

**Kuroo:** So does Yui

**Sugawara:** YOURE LUCKY YOURE IN TOKYO

**Bokuto:** Yui? Who is that???

**Daichi:** No one of importance

**Kenma:** Kuro why

**Sugawara:** 🙃

**Sugawara** left the group

**Daichi:** Why is this happening again

**Daichi** added  **Sugawara to the group**

**Kuroo:** My power 😎

**Kenma:** ur annoying

**Kuroo:** You hate me

**Kenma:** Sometimes

**Kuroo:** WHY ARE YOU AGREEING

**Kuroo:** KENMA I LOVE YOU

**Kuroo:** WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS

**Kuroo:** KENMA IM SO IN LOVE WITH YOU

**Kuroo:** SAY IT BACK DAMMIT


	35. i have a lot of feelings about kenma and kuroo right now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi: no offense kenma
> 
> Yamaguchi: but i could have gone my entire life without seeing what u look like with cum on your face 

_ Bokuto FUCKS  _ 😎

**Kuroo:** i have something to say 

**Asahi:** ok

**Asahi:** go on

**Nishinoya:** speak ur truth kuroo!!!

**Sugawara:** Or don’t

**Daichi:** Suga why

**Sugawara:** I don’t think kuroo should ever speak.

**Bokuto:** i disagree!

**Sugawara:** I see. Watch yourself.

**Bokuto: 😧**

**Hinata:** You remembered the eyebrows!

**Bokuto:** OF COURSE! ANYTHING FOR YOU HINATA!

**Akaashi:** Bokuto, stop screaming

**Akaashi:** And put your phone away, we’re on a date

**Bokuto:** But akaashi you were on your phone first :(

**Akaashi:** I was texting Kenma

**Tanaka:** Priorities ig 

**Sugawara:** I want to go on a date :(

**Sugawara:** Daichi:(

**Daichi:** We can go out tomorrow? 💗

**Sugawara:** Okay love 💓

**Oikawa:** Cute.

**Kuroo:** EXCUSE ME

**Kuroo:** I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY??

**Nishinoya:** SAY IT SAY IT SAY IT

**Kuroo:** So

**Kuroo:** Kenma came over right

**Kuroo:** And he brought me GRILLED MACKEREL 

**Kuroo:** And like I was really sad yesterday

**Bokuto:** YOU WERE SAD?

**Kuroo:** YES BUT IT’S FINE 

**Kuroo:** I don’t like talking about being sad. I feel like it’s annoying people and I’d rather not bother them

**Sugawara:** If you need to talk about something Kuroo don’t hesitate! We’ll never think you’re annoying and we’ll never be bothered and we’ll always be here to listen to you!!!! 😙

**Sugawara:** and if u feel too pressured or weird to talk about issues in a big groupchat remember you can always just message me because i’ll always listen to you no matter what u have to say and you’ll never b bothering me!!!!! 🥰

**Kuroo:** Aw Suga 💖

**Sugawara:** Aw Kuroo 💞

**Daichi:** This is nice

**Kuroo:** BUT ANYWAY I’M GETTING SIDE-TRACKED 

**Kuroo:** I DIDN’T TELL KENMA I WAS UPSET

**Kuroo:** But I asked to call him and he stayed on the phone with me all day even though I wasn’t talking much

**Kuroo:** AND THEN OUT OF NO WHERE HE’S ALL ‘it’s comforting sitting on the phone with you. Even if we aren’t talking, it still makes me feel like we’re together, and it’s my favorite feeling in the world.’

**Kuroo:** AND I WAS LIKE ‘ur favorite feeling is sitting with me on the phone?’

**Kuroo:** AND HE SAID ‘no, it’s being with you’

**Kuroo:** WHEN I TELL YOU MY HEART M E L T E D 

**Kuroo:** AND THEN TH ENEXT DAY HE COMES OVER WITH FOOD?? MY FAVORITE FOOD??? I’M SCREAMING. SCREAMING I TELL YOU

**Kuroo:** I’M SO IN LOVE WITH HIM

**Kuroo:** IT’S INSANE

**Kuroo:** AND THEN WE WERE SITTING LISTENING TO MUSIC AND WE WERE EATING AND HE KEPT FEEDING ME FOR NO REASON

**Kuroo:** IT WAS SO CUTE AND HE WAS SO WEIRDLY GENTLE ABOUT IT

**Kuroo:** AND THEN I MADE FUN OF HIM BECAUSE I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO

**Kuroo:** IDK HOW TO HANDLE THIS MUCH LOVE

**Kuroo:** AND HE SCRUNCHED HIS FACE UP ALL CUTE BUT KEPT DOING IT BUT HE WAS BLUSHING AND I KISSED HIM SO MUCH BECAUSE HOW COULD I NOT

**Kuroo:** HE’S SO PERFECT

**Kuroo:** And now he’s asleep on me

**Kuroo:** and i needed to TELL YOU GUYS

**Kuroo:** HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM

**Kuroo:** because he’s so perfect and i cafn’t stop looking at him. Like . he’s so beautiful

**Sugawara:** this is so cute

**Sugawara:** you’re just so in love

**Sugawara:** omg

**Oikawa:** kuroo that was cute

**Oikawa:** iwa-chan why don’t you ever talk about me like that?💔

**Iwaizumi:** i do. Just not anywhere you can see it

**Oikawa:** rude 

**Oikawa:** kenma’s going to wake up and JUST READ THIS

**Oikawa:** AND KNOW HOW MUCH KUROO LOVES HIM

**Oikawa:** AHHH so cute so cute so cute

**Nishinoya:** SO CUTE SO CUTE SO CUTE

**Kuroo:** i’m going to wake him up by kissing his face just the most 

**Kuroo:** brb

**Hinata:** i wish someone would kiss me all over MY face….

**Kageyama:** stop being jealous

**Hinata:** 😔

**Kageyama:** shut up

**Kageyama:** shut up shut up

**Kageyama:** i’m coming over rn so i can kiss you

**Hinata: 😃**

**Oikawa:** what a horrible emoji

**Sugawara:** well

**Sugawara:** i wish someone would cover my face w something

**Sugawara:** not kisses

**Sugawara:** something better ;)

**Oikawa:** i’m so scared of you sugawara

**Nishinoya:** i’m sure daichi could arrange that ;)

**Sugawara:** i’m sure he could 

**Sugawara:** daichi can you come over? 💓

**Daichi:** um

**Daichi:** yeah

-

**Kuroo:** sugawara how did you manage to turn my pure love confession into THAT

**Kuroo:** into T H A T 

**Nishinoya:** he’s a man who knows exactly what he wants in life

**Kuroo:** i guess he is

**Sugawara:** well kuroo at least what i got is BETTER than kisses

**Kuroo:** actually, whore, kenma got that too so he got the best of both worlds 😻😘 

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Daichi:** KUROO

**Asahi:** OH MY GOD KUROO

**Oikawa:** OH MY GOD MY EYES KUROO KUROO WHY WHY

**Nishinoya:** YESSS KENMA AND KUROO

**Kenma:** kuro i hate you

**Bokuto:** is that a new one?

**Kuroo:** yes!

**Daichi:** why did you know that

**Daichi:** actually. I don’t want to know 

**Sugawara:** _ attached image  _

**Oikawa:** SUGA YOU DON’T HAVE TO SEND ONE TOO

**Daichi:** SUGA STOP

**Kuroo:** I HAVE MORE PICTURES

**Kuroo:** AND OF MORE EXPLICIT THINGS

**Sugawara:** SO DO I

**Kuroo:** I BET MINE ARE WORSE

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** AHHHHHH

**Oikawa:** STOP STOP STOP I DON’T NEED TO SEE THIS SIDE OF KENMA

**Oikawa:** OR YOU SUGA OMG 

**Nishinoya:** YESSSS I SUPPORT YOU GUYS SO MUCH

**Nishinoya:** come on oikawa it’s not like they’re naked 

**Kuroo:** no but he can be

**Sugawara:** SO CAN I 

**Akaashi:** ok

**Akaashi:** I’m gonna stop you two right there 

**Akaashi** removed  **Sugawara** and  **Kuroo** from the chat

**Oikawa:** akaashi you’re my savior 

**Yamaguchi:** no offense kenma

**Yamaguchi:** but i could have gone my entire life without seeing what u look like with cum on your face 

**Yamaguchi:** same goes with suga but he isn’t here

**Kenma:** i’m so embarrassed omg 

**Kenma:** nbut i can[t stop laughing

**Asahi:** why is everyone in this chat so open

**Kenma:** sex is a beautiful thing

**Tsukishima:** it

**Tsukishima:** isn’t

**Nishinoya:** don’t listen to them kenma i think you looked AMAZING

**Kenma:** thanks that means just so much

**Akaashi:** Lol

**Nishinoya:** ouch 

**Kenma:** lolol tbh if you thnk that’s bad u should see his camera roll

**Kenma:** just be grateful that akaashi took him out of the groupchat so early on

**Kenma:** once kuro gets started with those he usually doesn’t stop

**Daichi:** same with suga….

**Oikawa:** both of you are dating fucking freaks


	36. I have the honor to be your obedient servant A.Burr Mr vice president I am not the reason no one trusts you. No one knows what you believe. I will not equivocate on my opinion, I have always worn it on my sleeve. Even if I said what you think I said

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: I need 35 cats to climb on my legs 
> 
> Kenma: Cat pants
> 
> Sugawara: what is happening
> 
> Kenma: 41 cats climbing up my legs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please guys, we're not bullying anyone who writes/wrote Hamilton fan fiction we PROMISE

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Suzu and Asahi Suzu and Asahi _

**Nishinoya:** _ attached video _

**Nishinoya:** She’s got a long way to go lol

**Tanaka:** A cat climbing Asahi’s leg

**Tanaka:** A CAT CLIMBING ASAHI’S LEG OMGOMGOMGOMG

**Kenma:** Cat pants

**Kuroo:** Aw lolng

**Kenma:** Cat pants

**Kenma:** I want 

**Kenma:** Cat pants

**Kenma:** I need 27 cats to climb on my legs

**Kenma:** cat pants

**Kuroo:** Kenma no

**Kenma:** Kuroo cat pants

**Kenma:** I need 35 cats to climb on my legs 

**Kenma:** Cat pants

**Sugawara:** what is happening

**Kenma:** 41 cats climbing up my legs

**Kenma:** cat pants

**Oikawa:** The number is only increasing shut up

**Kenma:** U donyt get it

**Kenma:** Cat

**Kenma:** Pants

**Daichi:** Cat pants

**Kenma:** He gets it!!

**Asahi:** She’s so cute

**Asahi:** Our daughter ❤️

**Nishinoya:** She’s alright 

**Asahi:** love her

**Nishinoya:** I think she gets more attention than me

**Asahi:** Noya, she’s a cat

**Nishinoya:** Yes

**Asahi:** I don’t know what you want me to say

**Nishinoya:** That you’re in love with me

**Asahi:** I’m 

**Asahi:** I’m embarrassed

**Nishinoya:** So you don’t love me?

**Asahi:** No, I do

**Nishinoya:** say it say it

**Kuroo:** Why do you torture this man

**Asahi:** I’m embarrassed

**Nishinoya:** You tell Suzu you love her all the time 😣

**Asahi:** She’s a cat!

**Asahi:** I tell you I love you all the time what are you saying

**Nishinoya:** Please come cuddle Asahi

**Daichi:** You are all over the place noya

**Sugawara:** I’m overwhelmed.

-

**Kenma:** We can ship historical figures

**Oikawa:** You’re scary

**Kenma:** We cna ship HISTORICAL FIGUERS HAHA

**Kuroo:** Are you okay?

**Kenma:** YES BUT IW AS reading fanfiction and I stumbled across a HAMILTON FIC HAH

**Kenma:** I didn’t know that was allowed

**Sugawara:** Woah thats so

**Sugawara:** AHAHAH HOW IS THAT ALLOWED HOW DO YOU HAVE HAMILTON SHIPS

**Akaashi:** Why were you reading fanfiction?

**Oikawa:** Wait who would you even ship from Hamilton? Like?? Alexander Hamilton and Aaron Burr?

**Sugawara:** Enemies to friends to lovers 😳🤩

**Oikawa:** High School au where Hamilton is a jock and Aaron Burr is in like, the art club

**Kenma:** High school au where they meet in detention omg

**Sugawara:** THE FACT THAT THESE ARE HISTORICAL PEOPLE HAAHA

**Kenma:** RIGHT ITS SO FUNNY

**Oikawa:** WHO DOES THIS

**Akaashi:** Why were you reading fanfiction?

**Kenma:** Don’t ask me that

**Sugawara:** I ship Eliza with Maria Reynolds 😤🥵

**Oikawa:** Schuyler flower shop and Maria works at a tattoo shop across the street

**Kuroo:** I ship me and Daichi 🥵

**Sugawara:** I’ll kick your ass 

**Kuroo:** Yui and Daichi 🥰

**Sugawara:** You’re dead

**Daichi:** Why Kuroo

**Nishinoya:** I ship me and Tanaka 😎😽

**Tanaka:** I ship us too 🥴😎

**Bokuto:** Akaashi, do you ship us?

**Akaashi:** Sometimes

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** I was joking

**Akaashi:** Of course I ship us

**-**

**Hinata:** I’m out of lip balm

**Hinata:** So my mom gave me lip oil

**Hinata:** And I look like I’m wearing lip gloss 😧

**Kageyama:** Sounds cute

**Hinata:** you sound cute

**Kageyama:** You’re cuter

**Hinata:** No you are

**Kageyama:** You’re the cutest!

**Hinata:** I’ve never seen anyone cuter than you!

**Kageyama:** Idiot, then you haven’t looked in the mirror

**Hinata:** YOU’RE THE IDIOT

**Kageyama:** YOU ARE, DUMBASS

**Oikawa:** omg why is this always happening

**Oikawa:** you are both such freaks

**Iwaizumi:** Leave them alone

**Oikawa:** Leave me alone

**Iwaizumi:** You’re joking right?

**Oikawa:** No, we aren’t talking today

**Kageyama:** What even happened?

**Oikawa:** Nothing

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa is mad because Matsukawa and I went out for lunch

**Oikawa:** I wasn’t invited!

**Iwaizumi:** You had to take Takeru to his dentist appointment

**Oikawa:** Then next time reschedule so I can go too!

**Iwaizumi:** We can go out again tomorrow if you want

**Oikawa:** No!

**Iwaizumi:** You’re being so dumb. I’m trying to fix it but you aren’t letting me

**Oikawa:** I just want to be invited next time

**Iwaizumi:** We invited you and you said you couldn’t come

**Oikawa:** Then cancel and then plan for a day I can go too

**Iwaizumi:** You’re ridiculous

**Oikawa:** I’m sad and you aren’t here

**Iwaizumi:** You’re so stupid.

**Iwaizumi:** Tell me next time instead of starting dumb arguments

**Iwaizumi:** I’m omw to your place ❤️

**Oikawa:** 💘🥺


	37. what is this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daichi: So?
> 
> Hinata: They used to date!!!!!
> 
> Daichi: ...So?
> 
> Hinata: So I don’t like it!!

_ Suzu and Asahi Suzu and Asahi _

**Asahi:** _ attached image _

**Asahi:** Nishinoya ‘i hate Suzu’ Yuu

**Asahi:** He’s been holding her in his lap all night!

**Kenma:** SUZU SUZU SUZU SUZU SUZU 

**Kenma:** KURO

**Kuroo:** No. 

**Kenma** has left the chat

**Sugawara:** Bye I guess

**Nishinoya:** DON’T EXPOSE ME

**Nishinoya:** I don’t need to LIKE her to hold her

**Asahi:** Every time she tries to escape you hold onto her tighter!

**Nishinoya:** It’s a challenge! It doesn’t mean anything!

**Asahi:** Just admit you love her!

**Nishinoya:** I refuse to lie!!!

**Nishinoya:** She’s been so grumpy lately, I’m just trying to make her nicer!

**Nishinoya:** Which I think is your fault asahi! You’re feeding her too much!

**Asahi:** How is that making her mean?!

**Nishinoya:** Anyone would be mean if they were gaining that much weight!

**Asahi:** She’s a cat!! It’s not a big deal to her!

**Nishinoya:** You don’t know that!

**Oikawa:** Why is it that big of a deal

**Oikawa:** Why are you two so dramatic?

**Iwaizumi:** Says you.

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan what is that supposed to mean??!??!?!

**Iwaizumi:** I think you know

**Oikawa:** I think you want me to die

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t

**Oikawa:** You do

**Iwaizumi:** Whatever

**Oikawa:** SO YOU DO

**Oikawa:** Where’s Kenma? He wouldn’t treat me like this

**Kuroo:** Yes he would, and you know it

**Oikawa** has added  **Kenma** to the chat

**Oikawa:** KENMA!!

**Oikawa:** You’re back I missed you so much!

**Akaashi:** Welcome back Kenma lol

**Kenma:** Hello Akaashiiiiiii

**Akaashi:** Hi

**Oikawa:** Wow. Okay.

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ Everyone Hates Me!:) _

**Kageyama:** Why didn’t you give him a nose?

**Oikawa:** Because it reminds me of you

**Oikawa:** And I want to break it’s nose

**Iwaizumi:** Pretty big words coming from someone who doesn’t know when and when not to use an apostrophe for its. 

**Oikawa:** HAJIME JUST SAY YOU WANT ME DEAD

**Oikawa:** It’s okay if you hate me.

**Oikawa:** I can take it. Just say you hate me. Say I’m holding you back from achieving actual happiness

**Sugawara:** Um

**Iwaizumi:** Why are you being like this?

**Iwaizumi:** Did something happen today?

**Oikawa:** No.

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa.

**Oikawa:** OKAY I HAD A BAD DAY AND SPILT COFFEE ON MYSELF BEFORE CLASS BUT COULDN’T CHANGE MY CLOTHES SO I JUST SMELT LIKE COFFEE AND THEN I WAS LATE SO I HAD TO SIT IN THE FRONT SMELLING LIKE COFEE

**Oikawa:** AND THEN I TRIPPED WALKING HOME AND SCRAPED MY KNEE SO NOW MY PANTS HAVE BLOOD AND COFFEE ON THEM

**Kuroo:** I’m sure you can turn that into a really bad smutty fanfiction 

**Kuroo:** blood and coffee

**Oikawa:** STOP I’M IN PAIN AND I CAN’T STOP CRYING

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll be over in ten minutes 

**Oikawa:** Iwa-channnnn (ノ﹏ヽ)

-

_ Everyone Hates Me!:) _

**Hinata:** Hey, guys.

**Hinata:** I have an issue.

**Daichi:** What’s your issue?

**Hinata:** Kageyama and I are arguing, and I want you all to agree with me.

**Hinata:** Because I’m mad and I’m right.

**Sugawara:** Oikawa he’s your son I think you should deal with this.

**Oikawa:** No thanks, I don’t want to be involved in whatever this is.

**Kuroo:** That sounds uncharacteristically mature

**Oikawa:** Shut up

**Akaashi:** What happened?

**Kageyama:** Shouyou I think you should get some sleep before you get angry about this again.

**Sugawara:** What

**Sugawara:** Hinata are you not sleeping again

**Hinata:** It’s not my fault that I can’t fall asleep!

**Kenma:** How long has it been?

**Hinata:** Not long

**Kageyama:** Three days

**Kenma:** Shouyou wtf

**Hinata:** Stupid Kageyama

**Hinata:** It’s not my fault!!!

**Hinata:** BUT ANYWAYS.

**Hinata:** Back to WHAT I WAS SAYING

**Hinata:** Kageyama’s hanging out with someone today!

**Daichi:** So?

**Hinata:** They used to date!!!!!

**Daichi:** ...So?

**Hinata:** So I don’t like it!!

**Oikawa:** Lol stop being jealous

**Hinata:** No!!!

**Oikawa:** Tobio I didn’t know you had exes 

**Hinata:** IT’S HIS ONLY ONE

**Hinata:** HIS FIRST LOVE

**Hinata:** I DON’T LIKE IT

**Daichi:** There’s nothing wrong with still talking to your first love, Hinata

**Hinata:** How would you know!

**Kenma:** lolololol

**Kuroo:** Daichi and I dated for like two years in high school

**Hinata:** What

**Sugawara:** Ew why would you bring that up

**Oikawa:** What

**Daichi:** Yeah. And there’s nothing wrong with us still being friends!

**Daichi:** We just

**Sugawara:** Fell out of love

**Daichi:** Yes

**Daichi:** And we both realized that we were in love with someone else

**Kuroo:** No hard feelings involved! I was happy with Daichi but we’re both happier now! And it’s fine

**Hinata:** wtf

**Hinata:** i still don’t care though! I still don’t like it!

**Sugawara:** Omg

**Kenma:** Tired grumpy shouyou is irrational

**Oikawa:** Who is this ex?

**Hinata:** MIYA ATSUMU

**Oikawa:** Oh?

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa, don’t.

**Oikawa:** The world would be a better place without the Miya twins. 

**Sugawara:** Twins?

**Oikawa:** Yes. 

**Oikawa:** I only hated one of them before but this just proves it! 

**Oikawa:** Miya Atsumu is after Tobio’s heart and I won’t let him have it! Tobio you can’t go!

**Kageyama:** I’m going. It’s not a big deal

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Kenma:** Why did you just send a picture of you crying?

**Kenma:** Shouyou you’re so embarrassing.

**Oikawa:** Tobio where are you going with him? 

**Kageyama:** It doesn’t matter

**Oikawa:** It does! The Miya twins are hell sent and I want to get rid of them

**Iwaizumi:** Calm down

**Sugawara:** Why do you hate them?

**Oikawa:** Oh?

**Oikawa:** Would you care to tell them Hajime?

**Iwaizumi:** You’re so shitty

**Iwaizumi:** I dated one of them

**Iwaizumi:** Osamu

**Iwaizumi:** He was my first everything 

**Oikawa:** EXCEPT KISS. BECAUSE YOU HATE ME THAT MUCH

**Oikawa:** YOU HATE ME SO MUCH THAT YOU GAVE YOUR FIRST KISS TO TOBIO AND YOUR FIRST EVERYTHING ELSE TO FUCKING OSAMU

**Iwaizumi:** It was literally forever ago!

**Iwaizumi:** I haven’t talked to him in years!

**Oikawa:** You cheated on me with osamu

**Iwaizumi:** We dated three years before you and I started dating!

**Oikawa:** IN MY HEART YOU CHEATED ON ME

**Hinata:** TOORU YOU UNDERSTAND ME

**Oikawa:** I DO

**Kageyama:** I think you need to sleep shouyou 

**Hinata:** I told you I already tried

**Kageyama:** Try harder

**Hinata:** Don’t be an idiot

**Kageyama:** You’re an idiot

**Hinata:** YOU’RE an idiot

**Kageyama:** Ugh.

**Kageyama:** I’m cancelling on Atsumu. I’m coming over and we’re taking a nap

**Hinata: 💗💓💞💕💖💘💝🦋🦋🦋🦋**

**Kageyama:** I don’t know what that means

-

**Kageyama:** Hinata is sleeping!!

**Sugawara:** YAY!!!!!

-

**Asahi:** Um…

**Nishinoya:** I’m so pissed off

**Sugawara:** Why?

**Daichi:** what… happened?

**Daichi:** I’m worried

**Nishinoya:** Suzu wasn’t fucking getting fat

**Oikawa:** What

**Nishinoya:** _ attached image _

**Kenma:** KITTENS?!?!?!??!

**Kenma:** KITTENS KITTENS KITTENS KITTENS KITTENS KITTENS KITTENS KITTENS KITTENS KITTENS KITTENS KITTENS 

**Kenma:** KITTENSAJHSDFJASDF

**Kuroo:** Kenma calm down

**Akaashi:** Don’t tell him what to do

**Kuroo:** Why are you here

**Kenma:** Kuro I want them

**Kuroo:** No

**Sugawara:** They’re so cute!

**Nishinoya:** I don’t want kittens! I didn’t even want a cat!

**Asahi:** yuu stop they’re so cute

**Nishinoya:** They aren’t

**Yamaguchi:** They are

**Nishinoya:** THEY AREN’T

**Kenma:** THEY ARE

-

**Asahi:** They’re meowing and Yuu is crying

**Asahi:** lol he keeps being like

**Asahi:** ‘they’re so cute asahi’

**Nishinoya:** get out of my apartment 


	38. You're Welcome but it's Shiro and it's even more scary than it sounds and literally takes you by surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: I get to see Akaashi I’m so alive right now I’m so excited I’m gonna pee
> 
> Oikawa: Don’t pee?

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to 🤬🤬🤬

**Nishinoya:** Guess whose day is… 

**Nishinoya:** HORRIBLE

**Nishinoya:** HAHA

**Iwaizumi:** Are you okay?

**Nishinoya:** I was

**Nishinoya:** uNTIL THIS GIRL AT STARBUCKS STARTED FLIRTING WITH ASAHI

**Nishinoya:** THAT MAN IS MY BOYFRIEND

**Asahi:** Noya

**Tanaka:** Maybe she would have flirted with you if you didn’t order a frap

**Nishinoya:** HOW DID YOU KNOW I GOT A FRAP 

**Tanka:** because you need to grow up HAHHAHAH

**Asahi:** She wasn’t flirting

**Nishinoya:** So she wrote her number on your cup to be friends

**Nishinoya:** SHE WAS FRIRTING

**Asahi:** I KNOW BUT I WAS UNCOMFORTABLE

**Tanaka:** You’re both so

**Tanaka:** Stupid?

**Nishinoya:** YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN HER. SHE KEPT GIGGLING LIKE EW SORRY ONLY I CAN LAUGH AT ASAHI’S NERVOUSNESS 

**Asahi:** Please calm down and don’t remind me about what happened

**Nishinoya:** ITS BURNED IN MY BRAIN

**Asahi:** That was horrible we’re never going to that Starbucks again I’m so scared

**Tanaka:** why are you scared

**Tanaka:** she didn’t know you guys were together

**Tanaka:** In her eyes it was harmless flirting

**Asahi:** So so scared

-

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** Art

**Sugawara:** I created art

**Oikawa:** Is that life sized?

**Sugawara:** yes

**Kageyama:** What are you gonna do with a cutout of Daichi

**Sugawara:** look at it, love it. Make funny videos and take funny pictures

**Kuroo:** I want one of Kenma

**Kenma:** fuck off

**Kuroo:** I’m obsessed with you please kenma

**Kenma:** no

**Sugawara:** I had a dream that it was Lin Manuel Miranda so I have to check on it every now and then to make sure it’s Daichi

**Oikawa:** You’re insane. Who dreams about that?

**Akaashi:** Once I had a dream that I was dating Bokuto’s dad.

**Akaashi:** Bokuto didn’t let me go over to his house for two weeks.

**Bokuto:** That was a horrible dream and I still haven’t forgiven my dad

**Akaashi:** You’re dramatic💕

**Bokuto:** MARRY ME

**-**

**Sugawara:** DAICHI MOVED HIM TO THE CLOSET

**Sugawara:** HE MOVED CARDBOARD DAICHI TO THE CLOSET

**Daichi:** It was kinda creepy

**Sugawara:** HE’S NOT CREEPY

**Sugawara:** he’s hot

**Daichi:** HE’S ME

**Sugawara:** EXACTLY HE’S HOT

**Daichi:** I EXIST WHY DO YOU NEED HIM

**Sugawara:** BECAUSE YOU NEVER SEND ME NUDES

**Daichi:** what

**Kuroo:** HAHHA DAICHI STILL DOESN’T SEND NUDES

**Daichi:** stop stop please

**Daichi:** it’s so awkward like, I don’t know how to make them look good

**Daichi:** ALSO SUGA

**Daichi:** WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH MY NUDES IM FULLY CLOTHED IN THAT

**Sugawara:** I’ll take what I can get. Like Daichi in a suit 🤤🤤🤤🤤

**Daichi:** That’s so embarrassing

**Sugawara:** WAIT DAICHI SHUT UP YOUR NUDES ARE ART

**Daichi:** THEY AREN’T YOURS ARE

**Sugawara:** DAICHI I LOVE YOU COME OVER HERE AND WRAP YOUR HANDS AROUND MY NECK

**Kuroo:** oh?

**Hinata:** I just got chills

**Kageyama:** shut up, idiot

**Nishinoya:** OMGOMG YES DAICHI GO CHOKE SUGA OMG

**Kuroo:** choking 🥵😍

**Iwaizumi:** choking 🥵😤

**Bokuto:** choking 🥵🥰

-

**Oikawa:** I’m in love 

**Oikawa:** So in love

**Hinata:** we know?

**Oikawa:** So so so in love

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN CAME OVER AFTER WORK RANDOMLY

**Oikawa:** HE SAID HE MISSED ME AND JUST WANTED TO TAKE A NAP WITH ME

**Oikawa:** NOW WE’RE JUST LAYING ON THE COUCH AND HES SLEEPING

**Oikawa:** HES SO CUTE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

**Kuroo:** CUTE SO CUTE

**Oikawa:** He’s so cute I can’t stop kissing his handsome face🥺🥺🥺

**Hinata:** forehead kisses forehead kisses

**Yamaguchi:** forehead kisses forehead kisses

**Hinata:** I want forehead kisses but Kageyama is in the shower

**Oikawa:** get those forehead kisses

**Kenma:** Get those forehead kisses!!!!!

**Yamaguchi:** demand those forehead kisses!!!!

**Hinata:** I will😤😤😤

**Hinata:** I’m not leaving this bed until I get 2 AT LEAST

**Oikawa:** 10 AT LEAST

**Kenma:** 47 AT LEAST

**Kageyama:** Why is my phone blowing up

**Hinata:** GET OUT HERE AND KISS MY FOREHEAD 76 TIMES

**Kageyama:** That’s so many kisses

**Kenma:** THATS NOT ENOUGH KISSES

**Hinata:** THATS NOT ENOUGH KISSES COME OUT HERE SO I CAN DRY YOUR HAIR WHILE YOU KISS MY FOREHEAD

**Kageyama:** okay calm down I need to put clothes on

**Hinata:** Okay!!

**Kenma:** No you don’t

**Nishinoya:** No you don’t

**Hinata:** He does

**Oikawa:** He doesn’t 

**Kageyama:** I HAVE TO

**Sugawara:** You don’t 

**Daichi:** Suga…

-

**Hinata:** Forehead kisses forehead kisses

**Kenma:** YES FOREHEAD KISSES

**Hinata:** _ Attached image _

**Hinata:** He fell asleep while I was drying his hair 🥺

**Hinata:** He’s been so stressed lately with school and volleyball and everything

**Kuroo:** Sleeping Kageyama sleeping Kageyama

**Kuroo:** I’m in love with him

**Kenma:** Then get a cardboard cutout of him

**Kuroo:** good idea

**Hinata:** NO

**Hinata:** If you do, you’re dead to me

**Kuroo:** Who has a good full body picture of Kageyama

**Kuroo:** just for fun teehee

**Tsukishima:** _ Attached image _

**Tsukishima:** _ Attached image _

**Tsukishima:** _ Attached image _

**Kuroo:** TSUKKI THANK YOU

**Hinata:** TSUKISHIMA WHY

**Yamaguchi:** LMAOOO TSUKKI

**Hinata:** I only have enemies here

**-**

**Bokuto:** EVERYONE

**Bokuto:** Guess what day it almost is!!!!

**Kuroo:** Go to sleep. It’s late

**Bokuto:** QUICK GUESS BEFORE I START MY COUNTDOWN

**Bokuto:** 5

**Bokuto:** 4

**Bokuto:** 3

**Bokuto:** 2

**Bokuto:** 1

**Bokuto:** IT’S AKAASHI’S BIRTHDAY!

**Bokuto:** Happy birthday to the love of my life! The prettiest and most kind and most understanding and most perfect person ever!!!

**Bokuto:** He’s asleep but he’ll see it soon!

**Bokuto:** Happy birthday Akaashi!! 💗

**Kuroo:** Aww, happy birthday!

**Kuroo:** Now get to bed handsome

**Bokuto:** lol goodnight

-

**Bokuto:** Did everyone say happy birthday?

**Daichi:** I think so 🙂

**Bokuto:** Why not in the groupchat?

**Akaashi:** Bokuto, you’re the only one who sends me a message on everything lol

**Akaashi:** I appreciate it 💖

**Yamaguchi:** aw that's sweet

**Akaashi:** Every message says something different too

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki, I want THIS ENERGY

**Tsukishima:** Maybe

**Kenma:** What are you doing for your birthday

**Akaashi:** Bokuto and I are going to visit my family. Nothing too crazy

**Kenma:** I bought you a gift, so you can come by whenever to get it

**Akaashi:** Aw, you didn’t have to

**Kenma:** Accept my love please

**Akaashi:** Lol if we get home early I’ll call you

**Kenma:** yesyesyes

**Kuroo:** calm down

**Kenma:** I get to see Akaashi I’m so alive right now I’m so excited I’m gonna pee

**Oikawa:** Don’t pee?

**Hinata:** How funny would that be

**Hinata:** Like wouldn’t that just be so weird lol

**Hinata:** WAIT HAHAH THATS MAKING ME LAUGH SO HARD JUST KENMA SO EXCITED TO SEE AKAASHI THAT HE PEES AHA

**Kageyama:** Freak

**Hinata:** Weirdo

**Kageyama:** Dumbass

**Hinata:** Idiot

**Daichi:** shut up

**Kageyama:** Sorry

**Hinata:** Sorry

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!


	39. I wrote the beginning when I was really :-( and it shows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: You want to get fucked?
> 
> Kenma: Lol
> 
> Kuroo: wait no wait no
> 
> Kenma: I mean I’ve never done it before but I can try

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ I’m ugly:( _

**Daichi:** What

**Sugawara:** Why

**Kageyama:** No you aren’t!

**Iwaizumi:** No, you aren’t

**Oikawa:** But I am:(

**Kageyama:** Why do you think that?

**Oikawa:** Idk I can’t stop looking in the mirror

**Oikawa:** And i feel like i’m at my worst rn

**Oikawa:** I get uglier and uglier with each passing minute!

**Iwaizumi:** You’re not ugly, Tooru. What’s wrong?

**Oikawa:** Idk :(

**Oikawa:** Nothing

**Oikawa:** But also everything :(

**Sugawara:** That’s always the worst

**Kenma:** True

**Akaashi:** True

**Asahi:** True

**Kuroo:** Damn is everyone in this chat sad???

**Akaashi:** Sometimes, yes

**Kenma:** Yeah

**Oikawa:** yeah :(

**Oikawa:** Quick question guys

**Iwaizumi:** I can already tell you that the answer is no

**Oikawa:** Shut up iwa-chan I’m still gonna ask

**Oikawa:** Be serious

**Oikawa:** Am I annoying?? Do I bother you??? Do you guys hate me??

**Oikawa:** Just asking for science haha

**Sugawara:** Hmmm.

**Sugawara:** Well sometimes you’re annoying

**Daichi:** Suga!

**Sugawara:** But you never bother me. Even if you’re being annoying, I think it’s funny. And I never think you’re bothering me or anyone else in this chat. 

**Sugawara:** And I think that it goes without saying that I don’t hate u.

**Kageyama:** I don’t think you’re annoying at all. So you never bother me. I like to think that we’re friends!

**Oikawa:** You think we’re friends?

**Oikawa:** But I’m always mean to you

**Kageyama:** It’s fine lol

**Oikawa:** No it’s not :( I’m such a bad person :(((

**Iwaizumi:** Do you want me to come over?

**Oikawa:** Yes

**-**

**Oikawa:** _ attached image  _

**Oikawa:** iwa-chan bought me flowers :( i don’t deserve him

**Iwaizumi:** Yes you do, idiot.

**Sugawara:** Yes you do

**Daichi:** Yes you do

**Yamaguchi:** Yes you do

**Kageyama:** Yes you do

**Bokuto:** YES YOU DO

-

**Asahi** : can cats drink coffee?

**Daichi** : idk

**Sugawara** : asahi none of us beside you and noya own a cat

**Asahi** : well!! Idk!!! Maybe you’d know!

**Oikawa** : why would we have random cat knowledge 

**Asahi:** IDK LEAVE ME ALONE

**Akaashi** : no, cats can’t have coffee.

**Akaashi:** it’s really dangerous for them

**Asahi:** thank you Akaashi

**Akaashi:** no problem.

**Kuroo:** why are you asking?

**Kenma:** HAVE YOU BEEN GIVING MY SUZU COFFEE?

**Nishinoya:** YOUR suzu???

**Kenma:** yes. Mine

**Nishinoya:** I think you mean MINE

**Asahi:** noya has coffee and suzu keeps trying to drink it

**Nishinoya** : OBVIOUSLY I didn’t know cats couldn’t have coffee or I wouldn’t have even left it anywhere she can reach it

**Kenma:** if u kill my suzu i'll never forgive you

**Nishinoya:** do you mean MY suzu?

**Oikawa:** oh my god

**Oikawa:** stop

**Daichi:** this is big talk for someone who doesn’t like their cat noya

**Nishinoya:** shut the fuck up daichi

**Daichi:** Excuse me?

**Nishinoya:** I’M SORRY

**Tanaka:** Lol Dad Daichi

**Sugawara:** More like daddy daichi 🥵

**Sugawara:** Daddy come over

**Sugawara:** haha oops i meant *daichi

**Oikawa:** No you didn’t

**Kuroo:** No you didn’t

**Sugawara:** No I didn’t

**Daichi:** God

-

**Asahi:** _ attached image _

**Asahi:** YUU GOT SUZU A HAT

**Kenma:** CAT HAT CAT HAT

**Kenma:** CAT 

**Kenma:** HAT

**Kenma:** KURO PLEASE I WANT A CAT I WANT A CAT I WANT A CAT IN A CAT HAT

**Kenma:** I WANT

**Kenma:** A MILLION

**Sugawara:** SUZU SUZU IS SO CUTE SUZU SUZU 

**Sugawara:** Daichi let’s get a cat ❤️

**Daichi:** Okay!

**Kenma:** NOT FAIR NOT FAIR KURO NOT FAIR NOT FAIR

**Kuroo:** I’m beginning to think you guys do this shit on purpose.

**Sugawara: 😋**

**-**

**Hinata** and  **Kenma:**

**Hinata:** kenma i need your expertise 

**Kenma:** How do you even know that word

**Hinata:** wym you don’t even know how to spell

**Kenma:** rude.

**Kenma:** what do you need?

**Kenma:** I’m busy right now

**Hinata:** doing what?

**Kenma:** Kuro

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Kenma:** Joking

**Hinata:** That wasn’t funny

**Kenma:** Yes it was, your brain just isn’t complex enough to see the humor in it ✨

**Hinata:** I hate you kenma

**Kenma:** Yeah, yeah

**Kenma:** what do you need help with?

-

**Nishinoya** and  **Hinata:**

**Nishinoya:** shouyou 

**Nishinoya:** shouyou

**Nishinoya:** shouyou why aren’t you answering me

**Hinata:** so i was watching one of kageyama’s matches right

**Nishinoya:** ..right??

**Hinata:** and I REALIZED 

**Hinata:** that he’s really HOT

**Hinata:** and OBVIOUSLY I ALREADY KNEW THAT

**Hinata:** I JUST DON’T TALK ABOUT IT BECAUSE IT’S EMBARRASSING

**Hinata:** BUT ANYWAY I WAS WATCHING AND IDK HE SPIKED AND I WAS LIKE OMG

**Hinata:** and anyway i wanna DO IT

**Hinata:** KENMA HELP

**Nishinoya:** I’m not kenma LMFAOOOO

**Nishinoya:** BUT YES MY VIRGIN SHOUYOU FINALLY 😍 FINALLY 🥰

**Hinata Shouyou** has blocked  **Nishinoya Yuu**

**-**

**Hinata** and  **Kenma**

**Kenma:** Shouyou???

**Kenma:** Did you die

**Kenma:** You better hurry up, Kuro’s getting restless….

**Kenma:** HE’S KISSING MY NECK SHOUYOU I’M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO STOP HIM SOON

**Kenma:** I’M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO CONCENTRATE ON YOU AND YOUR STUPID PROBLEMS SOON..

**Hinata:** KENMA I’M SO EMBARRASSED

**Kenma:** Calm down I’m joking

**Kenma:** Kind of

**Hinata:** NO NO NO

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** I MEANT TO SEND THIS TO YOU

**Hinata:** BUT NOYA KEPT BLOWING UP MY PHONE AND I ACCIDENTALLY CLICKED ON HIS NAME

**Kenma:** oh my god

**Kenma:** oh my god oh my god

**Kenma:** I can’t stop laughing

**Kenma:** oh my god shouyou you’re so embarrassing

**Kenma:** I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING

**Kenma:** KURO’S LAUGHIGN AT YOU

**Kenma:** i think he’s laughing so much that he isn’t even hard anymore 😎😎

**Hinata:** KENMA STOP

**Kenma:** JOKING HAHAHA

**Hinata:** STOP DOING THAT

**Kenma:** No

**Kenma:** It embarrasses um

**Kenma:** what did he call u

**Kenma:** lol

**Kenma:** it embarrasses my virgin shouyou 

**Hinata:** I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATEYOU

**Kenma:** AHAHAHAHA

-

_ I’m Ugly :( _

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Kageyama FUCKS _

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Sugawara:** FINALLY

**Bokuto:** YES

**Kenma:** AHAHAHAHAHA

**Hinata:** STOP

**Hinata** has removed  **Kageyama** from the chat

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Tsukishima:** what’s going on?

**Tsukishima:** I know for a fact Kageyama hasn’t fucked hinata yet

**Hinata:** TSUKISHIMA WTF

**Hinata:** DON’T JUST SAY THAT

**Tsukishima:** Lol

**Nishinoya:** _ attached image _

**Nishinoya:** _ attached image _

**Asahi:** Noya why lol

**Nishinoya:** I’m a matchmaker!

**Nishinoya:** our dear shouyou needs advice!

**Kenma:** I already gave him advice!

**Hinata:** Actually you just laughed at me

**Tsukishima:** Oh my god

**Oikawa:** I don’t want to be apart of this

**Oikawa:** I’m so embarrassed right now

**Kuroo:** Just tell him!

**Hinata:** How?

**Kuroo:** Lol just say 

**Kuroo:** Kageyama, you’re sexy as fuck and I’ve wanted you to fuck my brains out since the moment I saw you 😍

**Sugawara:** That sounds a little personal Kuroo

**Sugawara:** Are you sure that isn’t something you want to tell him yourself?

**Kuroo:** It sure is 😍

**Kenma:** You want to get fucked?

**Kenma:** Lol

**Kuroo:** wait no wait no

**Kenma:** I mean I’ve never done it before but I can try

**Kuroo:** WAIT NO WAIT NO

**Sugawara:** AHAHAH

**Hinata:** I HATE ALL OF YOU

**Sugawara:** Just tell him! Don’t be as upfront as Kuroo but maybe just say you want to take your relationship to the next level

**Sugawara:** And make sure you do your research

**Sugawara:** And have the proper supplies you need 

**Kuroo:** sugawara i think my neck is going to snap bc of how hard i’m cringing at you

**Sugawara:** i’m telling him what he needs to hear!

**Kuroo:** you sound like a parent giving the talk

**Sugawara:** I don’t!

**Akaashi:** You do.

**Akaashi:** Hinata, if you want to take your relationship to that level then go for it. But don’t try to force it. It’ll happen when it happens, you know? And there are other ways to be sexually active without actually fully having sex.

**Akaashi:** Like oral sex, or like.. Hand jobs lol

**Kuroo:** That makes no sense at all

**Bokuto:** Yes it does!

**Daichi:** No it doesn’t

**Hinata:** Hmmm. I think I get it. Thanks Akaashi!

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Hinata:** I’m gonna meet up with him after his match!

**Oikawa:** EWEWEWEWEW

**Oikawa:** I DON’T WANT TO KNOW THIS

**Oikawa:** I’M DISGUSTED 

**Oikawa:** I’M THROWING UP AS WE SPEAK

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!!


	40. head empty just phantom of the opera

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: Cutieeee
> 
> Kenma: I’ll kill you
> 
> Kuroo: You are so cute my knees are weak my stomach is 🦋✨🦋✨🦋
> 
> Kenma: I want you dead

_ Kageyama FUCKS  _

**Oikawa** : I’m so tired

**Oikawa:** I’m so tired I’m so tired 

**Oikawa:** Why am I so tired? What did I do to deserve this?

**Oikawa:** I guess everyone hates me

**Oikawa:** So no one is gonna ask why I’m tired?

**Oikawa:** I’m so tired I’m so tired I’m so tired 

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up Oikawa

**Oikawa:** I’m so tired that I have a headache 

**Oikawa:** My entire head hurts

**Oikawa:** And my brain is going to explode 

**Oikawa:** And my Iwa-chan doesn’t even care 💔

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up

**Oikawa:** you’re not going to ask why I’m tired???

**Iwaizumi:** I already know why you’re tired.

**Oikawa:** YOU DON’T CARE ABOUT ME

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t say that

**Oikawa:** I’ll say it because it’s true! 

**Sugawara:** Oh my god Oikawa shut up

**Oikawa:** NO ONE!

**Oikawa:** NO ONE CARES ABOUT ME!

**Kenma:** TOORU. It is 8am. WHY ARE YOU BLOWING UP MY PHONE AT 8AM?

**Kuroo:** Oh god you pissed him off

**Kuroo:** He’s so grumpy 

**Kuroo:** He won’t stop grumbling

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** Look at this blanket burrito 

**Kenma** : I’ll kill you 

**Kuroo:** Cutieeee

**Kenma:** I’ll kill you

**Kuroo:** You are so cute my knees are weak my stomach is 🦋✨🦋✨🦋

**Kenma:** I want you dead

**Kuroo:** I’m So In Love With You

**Kageyama:** Why are you tired Oikawa?

**Oikawa:** THANK YOU TOBIO

**Oikawa:** My only friend

**Oikawa:** the ONLY person in this chat that cares about me

**Sugawara:** Yeah yeah

**Oikawa:** I ONLY GOT THREE HOURS OF SLEEP

**Oikawa:** MY SISTER CAME OVER AND BARGED INTO MY APARTMENT

**Oikawa:** AND WOKE ME UP

**Iwaizumi:** I only got three hours of sleep but you don’t hear me complaining

**Iwaizumi:** AND I got embarrassed in front of your sister

**Oikawa:** Idk what you want from me Iwa-chan

**Oikawa:** Don’t sleep naked next time maybe??

**Iwaizumi:** YOU DID THE SAME THING

**Oikawa:** WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME

**Iwaizumi:** I hate you

**Iwaizumi:** You’re so shitty

**Oikawa:** MY BRAIN IS GOING TO EXPLODE FROM BEING SO TIRED AND YOU’RE CALLING ME SHITTY??

**Kenma:** Tooru send another text to the groupchat I dare you

**Kenma:** Yeah that’s what I thought

**Kenma:** I’m going back to sleep. No one better message the chat today or ELSE

-

**Kageyama:** just found something

**Kageyama:** _attached image_

**Kenma** : lol shouyou I forgot you had braces 

**Hinata:** SHUT UP SHUT UP

**Oikawa:** HAHA BRACEFACE BRACEFACE

**Hinata** : SHUT UP SHUT UP

**Kageyama** : Stop 

**Sugawara:** Awwww Hinata you looked like such a dweeb lol

**Nishinoya:** HAHAHAHAHA A DWEEB

**Kageyama:** I think he looked cute

**Kenma:** He didn’t

**Kageyama:** Stop! He’s cute

**Oikawa:** Tobio don’t be in love like that in front of me

**Iwaizumi:** You’re always in love in front of him though

**Oikawa:** Yeah but I’m allowed to

**Iwaizumi:** You’re stupid

**Oikawa:** Mean Iwa-chan 

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA YOU THINK I LOOKED CUTE?

**Kageyama:** Yes!

**Hinata:** I hated how I looked with braces

**Kageyama:** They’re cute!

**Hinata:** I think you’re cute 

**Oikawa:** Ew you two, don’t do this

**Kageyama** : I think you’re cuter

**Daichi:** Stop

**Kenma:** How dare you tell them to stop

**Hinata** : Well you’re the cutest 

**Kageyama:** No I’m not, idiot

**Hinata** : You are, dimbass 

**Oikawa** : Dimbass?

**Kenma:** Dimbass.

**Oikawa:** Are you okay? Okaying me kenma????

**Kenma:** What the fuck

**Kenma:** Why did you think about that

**Oikawa:** My mind is an enigma ✨

**Iwaizumi:** Or you just watched the fault in our stars last night and it’s on your mind

**Oikawa:** Shut up Iwa-chan

**Iwaizumi:** Or you just watched the fault in our stars last night and cried on me 

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN

**Iwaizumi:** You cried you cried you cried

**Oikawa:** STOP

**Kenma:** Imagine crying to the fault in our stars

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi doesn’t have to imagine that

**Yamaguchi:** STOP

**Kenma:** AHAHAHA

**Oikawa:** Shouyou remember when you used to write fanfiction for the fault in our stars on wattpad?

**Akaashi:** WHAT

**Hinata:** SHUT UP

**Kenma:** HAHAHAHA

**Sugawara:** I’ve literally never seen that

**Kenma:** Good. It’s horrible

**Kuroo:** Weren’t you like

**Kuroo:** Overly attracted to the blind guy

**Kenma:** Let’s not talk about that

**Nishinoya:** ISAAC

**Nishinoya:** kuroo isaac has your energy

**Kuroo:** Does he?

**Kenma:** Nishinoya shut the fuck up

**Kuroo:** Good to know

**Kenma:** NISHINOYA WHY

**Nishinoya:** I’M A MATCHMAKER IT’S WHAT I DO

-

**Sugawara:** Do you ever like

**Sugawara:** Crave the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack

**Nishinoya:** No

**Kenma:** No

**Kuroo:** Never

**Sugawara:** So I’m the only one who’s just craving Christine? 😔

**Oikawa:** Whom

**Sugawara:** You know

**Sugawara:** can it be

**Sugawara:** can it be CHRISTINE?

**Daichi:** Suga stop

**Sugawara:** BRAVO!

**Sugawara:** LONG AGO

**Sugawara:** IT SEEMS SO LONG AGO

**Daichi:** Suga

**Sugawara:** HOW YOUNG AND INNOCENT WE WERE

**Sugawara:** SHE MAY NOT REMEMBER ME

**Sugawara:** BUT I REMEMBER HER

**Daichi:** Koushi stop.

**Sugawara:** Oh

**Sugawara:** Daichi wanna come over?? 😋

**Nishinoya:** Suga what is this energy

**Oikawa:** HOW DID THAT MAKE YOU HORNY LOL

**Kuroo:** I think everything makes him horny

**Akaashi:** Like you can talk

**Kuroo:** EXCUSE ME

**Hinata:** SPEAKING OF!

**Kageyama:** Shut up

**Hinata:** GUESS WHAT 

**Nishinoya:** YES

**Nishinoya:** YES SHOUYOU YES YES 

**Kageyama** removed  **Hinata** from the chat

**Sugawara:** BOO

**Kageyama:** You guys don’t need to hear about it

**Oikawa:** You’re right. We don’t

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!


	41. Why am i writing another episode in the same day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: Lev said that???
> 
> Kenma: I’m gagging
> 
> Kuroo: Wait without me? 😳🤚🏻
> 
> Oikawa: wtf

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  _ This is the best day of my life _

**Sugawara:** OoOo sounds exciting

**Kuroo:** Very exciting!

**Oikawa:** Well???

**Kuroo:** ..well????

**Oikawa:** WHAT HAPPENED YOU IDIOT 

**Kuroo:** Oh!

**Kuroo:** KENMA LISTEN UP

**Kenma:** Yes?

**Kuroo:** LEV WENT ON A DATE!

**Hinata:** OMG WITH WHO??

**Kenma:** wtf

**Kenma:** Lev doesn’t have game

**Kenma:** I would know

**Kuroo:** YOU WOULD KNOW??

**Kenma:** Calm down

**Kuroo:** CALM DOWN???

**Bokuto:** KUROO SOMEONE WAS TRYING TO TAKE YOUR MAN

**Kuroo:** I KNOW

**Bokuto:** AHHHH

**Kuroo:** AHHHHHH

**Akaashi:** Would you two stop it?

**Kuroo:** WHATEVER

**Kuroo:** Anyway. He went out with Yaku!

**Kenma:** WTF

**Kenma:** Lmao

**Kenma:** lmao lmao lmao

**Kuroo:** What?

**Kuroo:** Are you jealous that your secret lover Lev has a short boyfriend who isn’t you?

**Kenma:** Shut the fuck up lol

**Kenma:** Lev makes me sick and you know it

**Hinata:** I CAN’T BELIEVE LEV GOT A DATE!! I’M SO PROUD

**Bokuto:** ME TOO!!!

**Hinata:** YESSS

**Bokuto:** YESSSS

**Hinata:** YESSSSS

**Bokuto:** YESSSS

**Sugawara:** god shut UP

-

**Hinata** and  **Kenma**

**Hinata:** I HAVE A QUESTION

**Kenma:** Oh god

**Kenma:** Ok

**Hinata:** um

**Hinata:** howwasyourfirsttimewithkuroo?

**Kenma:** Why did you type it like that

**Kenma:** Why are you acting like it’s a big deal

**Kenma:** You’re being so embarrassing

**Hinata:** It’s just! I want it to be special!

**Kenma:** Omg

**Kenma:** So why are you asking me??

**Hinata:** IDK MAYBE IT’LL MAKE ME LESS NERVOUS

**Kenma:** Stop screaming

**Kenma:** There’s nothing to be nervous about

**Kenma:** And we had sex the first time during a vacation after graduation. 

**Kenma:** It was actually really nice

**Kenma:** Kuro took me to the beach which sucked because it was hot but then he bought me things because I was grumpy and then he took me out to dinner and then we went back to the hotel and lol

**Kenma:** Yeah

**Hinata:** THAT’S CUTE

**Hinata:** I CAN’T LIVE UP TO THAT

**Kenma:** ??? you don’t have to

**Hinata:** BYE

**Kenma:** Bye?? Fucking freak

-

**Oikawa** and  **Hinata**

**Hinata:** TOORU

**Hinata:** I HAVE A QUESTION

**Oikawa:** What do you want?

**Hinata:** ummmm um um um

**Hinata:** how did you and um

**Hinata:** how did your first time with Iwaizumi go?

**Oikawa:** …

**Oikawa:** Why are you asking me this?

**Hinata:** idk! 

**Hinata:** i’m just! NERVOUS! 

**Hinata:** I want to make my first time with Kageyama special 

**Oikawa:** Are you in the market for ideas or something, u idiot? I still don’t get it

**Hinata:** NO WTF

**Hinata:** idk i’m just

**Hinata:** Asking??

**Hinata:** I’M NERVOUS OK

**Oikawa:** Whatever

**Oikawa:** We won a volleyball game and then fucked in his car 

**Hinata:** Are you serious

**Hinata:** Ew

**Oikawa:** Don’t ew us it was romantic

**Hinata:** Bye

**Oikawa:** Whatever

-

_ This is the best day of my life _

**Oikawa:** Just letting you guys know

**Oikawa:** Shouyou is on a rampage today

**Oikawa:** a weird, sex story seeking rampage

**Oikawa:** So don’t answer him unless you feel like oversharing

**Nishinoya:** LMAO SHOUYOU MESSAGE ME MESSAGE ME

**Asahi:** Oh god

**Bokuto:** YESS

-

**Daichi** and  **Hinata:**

**Hinata:** Daichi

**Hinata:** I have a question

**Daichi:** No. Ask Sugawara

**Hinata:** Suga’s scary

**Daichi:** Lol

**Daichi:** That’s fair

**Daichi:** But the answer is still no.

**Hinata:** UGH

\--

_ This is the best day of my life _

**Tanaka:** Guys I’m scared

**Nishinoya:** What’s wrong bby

**Tanaka:** So I’ve been hooking up with this girl right

**Bokuto:** OOOOOOOO

**Nishinoya:** YES TANAKA

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Tanaka FUCKS _

**Tanaka:** YES BUT I’M SCARED

**Daichi:** Why?

**Tanaka:** SO THIS GIRL RIGHT

**Tanaka:** I was with her the other night and she was talking to me and she was like

**Tanaka:** ‘omg ryu my friend is so interested in u we should have a threeway’

**Tanaka:** AND BEFORE I COULD EVEN RESPOND HER ROOMMATE GOES 

**Tanaka:** ‘omg we should have a FOURWAY’

**Tanaka:** IS THAT A THING???

**Tanaka:** I’M SO SCARED

**Tanaka:** I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY

**Tanaka:** I PRETENDED ASAHI BROKE HIS LEG AND SAID I HAD TO LEAVE

**Nishinoya:** AHAHAHA WHAT

**Tanaka:** I PANICKED

**Nishinoya:** WHY WAS THAT YOUR GO-TO PANIC LIE

**Tanaka:** IDK BUT IT HAPPENED

**Nishinoya:** but DO IT RYU DO IT DO IT

**Tanaka:** NO NO NO NO

**Kenma:** Akaashi do you remember when Kuro and Bokuto were freaks about that

**Tanaka:** WHAT

**Akaashi:** Don’t remind me

**Kuroo:** Stop we thought it would be funny

**Akaashi:** What about us all taking a shower together even sounds remotely funny

**Kenma:** Idiots. Idiots idiots idiots 

**Kuroo:** WE SAW IT ON A TV SHOW AND THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY

**Bokuto:** IT WAS FUNNY IN THE SHOW

**Kenma:** THAT DOESN’T MEAN IT’LL BE FUNNY IN REAL LIFE??? FREAKS

**Oikawa:** You guys scare me 

**Oikawa:** Like

**Oikawa:** A lot

-

**Kuroo:** LEV WENT ON A DATE

**Oikawa:** we know

**Kuroo:** AND HE’S STILL CALLING KENMA CUTE???

**Kuroo:** I’M GOING TO KILL HIM

**Daichi:** Lol 

**Daichi:** Lev going on a date isn’t going to make him stop thinking Kenma is cute

**Kuroo:** BUT DOES HE NEED TO SAY IT?? TO MY FACE??

**Kenma:** Lev said to ur face that i’m cute?? I’m going to be SICK

**Kuroo:** Ok...No. But he and Yaku are talking about it near me

**Kuroo:** and i OVERHEARD

**Kuroo:** They just kissed?

**Kuroo:** SO WHY ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT MY KENMA MOVE ON

**Sugawara:** ‘my kenma’ how cute

**Akaashi:** Ikr

**Kuroo:** LEV JUST CONFIRMED HE HAD A CRUSH ON YOU

**Kuroo:** HE JUST SAID IT

**Kuroo:** I HAD A HUGE CRUSH ON KENMA JUST CAME OUT OF HIS MOUTH

**Kuroo:** I’M GONNA LIGHT HIM ON FIRE

**Bokuto:** I’LL COME WITH

**Daichi:** Calm down

**Kenma:** Lev said that???

**Kenma:** I’m gagging

**Kuroo:** Wait without me? 😳🤚🏻

**Oikawa:** wtf

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHAHA

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	42. When you skipped 42 so this is 42

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: Actually, bitch, I’d never willingly listen to Hamilton.
> 
> Iwaizumi: Oikawa you literally have that entire soundtrack memorized.
> 
> Oikawa: Why would you tell them that?
> 
> Kageyama: We already know??

_ Tanaka FUCKS _

**Oikawa:** Koushi, Iwa-chan just did the rudest thing!

**Akaashi:** Group chat

**Oikawa:** I HAD TO WALK HOME FROM YOUR APARTMENT RIGHT

**Oikawa:** AND I WAS FREEZING

**Oikawa:** LITERALLY SO COLD

**Kuroo:** Group chat

**Oikawa:** AND I CAME IN AND HE WAS LIKE HALF ASLEEP ON MY COUCH

**Oikawa:** AND I WAS SO EXCITED THAT HE WAS THERE AND I WENT UP TO HIM AND WAS LIKE

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN I’M FREEZING CAN YOU WARM ME UP

**Oikawa:** AND HE GOES 

**Oikawa:** NO JUST GO TAKE A HOT SHOWER

**Oikawa:** EXCUSE ME?

**Oikawa:** SO I WAS LIKE NO. LIKE. FUCK ME AND WARM ME UP

**Oikawa:** BECAUSE I HAVEN’T SEEN HIM ALL DAY 

**Oikawa:** AND HE JUST SAID NO BECAUSE HE WAS WATCHING TV

**Oikawa:** ACTUALLY SIR YOU WERE FALLING ASLEEP

**Oikawa:** AND ALL I WANTED WAS TO GET RAILED TO STITCHES 

**Oikawa:** BUT WHATEVER

**Oikawa:** UGH UGH UGH UGH

**Iwaizumi:** Yeah so go take a shower and warm up now that you’ve told the groupchat your problems

**Nishinoya:** GET RAILED TO STITCHES

**Nishinoya:** I CAN’T BREATHE

**Nishinoya:** IWAIZUMI WHY WOULD YOU DENY THIS MAN

**Oikawa:** I’m so embarrassed 

**Oikawa:** I don’t look at chats when I’m typing

**Kenma:** Yes you do

**Kenma:** You just don’t pay attention to stuff like that when you’re throwing a fit

**Oikawa:** Don’t say I was throwing a fit! You have no proof!

**Kenma:** I can literally just scroll up

**Kuroo:** OIKAWA GETS HORNY??? 

**Kuroo:** LET ME REPHRASE THAT

**Kuroo:** OIKAWA WANTS TO GET RAILED TO STITCHES????

**Sugawara:** Daichi come rail me to stitches

**Nishinoya:** Asahi come rail me to stitches

**Oikawa:** SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

**Nishinoya:** HORNY OIKAWA HORNY OIKAWA

**Oikawa:** EW STOP

**Tanaka:** HORNY OIKAWA HORNY OIKAWA

**Oikawa** has left the chat

**Iwaizumi:** Lol

**Iwaizumi:** I’m gonna go get in the shower

**Nishinoya:** YESSS IWAIZUMI

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Iwa-chan FUCKS _

-

_ Iwa-chan FUCKS _

**Kuroo:** Kenma just cried to the stay alive reprise on the hamilton soundtrack??

**Oikawa:** HAHAHAH

**Oikawa:** wait ew guys wtf

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ Kenma is a crybaby _

**Kenma:** WHY ARE YOU ATTACKING ME

**Kuroo:** BECAUSE WHO CRIES TO THAT SONG

**Kenma:** IDK I JUST

**Kenma:** JUST SAY YOU DON’T LOVE ME ANYMORE KURO

**Kuroo:** SHUT UP

**Kenma:** I CAN HANDLE IT

**Kuroo:** No you can’t you literally can’t breathe rn

**Kenma:** BECAUSE IT’S QUIET UPSTOWN IS PALYOING

**Sugawara:** You sound like Oikawa lol

**Oikawa:** Actually, bitch, I’d never willingly listen to Hamilton.

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa you literally have that entire soundtrack memorized.

**Oikawa:** Why would you tell them that?

**Kageyama:** We already know??

**Nishinoya:** If you see him in the street walking by himself talking to himself have pity 💔

**Kageyama:** Philip you would like it uptown it’s quiet uptown…

**Kenma:** STOP

**Kenma:** IT’S SO SAD

**Kenma:** HE JUST TOLD HIS SON THAT HE WOULDN’T DIE

**Kenma:** AND THEN HE DID

**Kenma:** HE WAS SO YOUNG

**Kenma:** SO FULL OF LIFE

**Kenma:** HE WAS SO EXCITED ABOUT EVERTYTHING

**KENMA:** MY NME IS PHILIP I AM AP OET AND I’M A LITTLE NERVOUS BUT I CNA’T SHOW TI

**Kenma:** AND THEN HE FUCKING DIES

**Kenma:** I CNA’T BREATHE I’M SPO SAD

**Nishinoya:** KENMA SHUT UP HAHAHA

**Kuroo:** God why are you like this

**Kenma:** YOU DON’T LOVE ME

**Kuroo:** STOP LMAO

**Akaashi:** So no one is paying attention to the fact that Kenma is upset and crying and Kuroo’s just laughing at him?

**Akaashi:** Not comforting him? Like a good boyfriend should?

**Bokuto:** UH-OH 

**Kuroo:** Excuse me

**Akaashi:** Kenma your boyfriend is horrible.

**Akaashi:** Run away with me instead.

**Kuroo:** Don’t touch my boyfriend

**Sugawara:** Why ARE you not comforting your crying boyfriend Kuroo? 🤔

**Kuroo:** FUCK OFF I LITERALLY AM

**Kuroo:** MY  T SHIRT IS WET BECAUSE OF HIM

**Nishinoya:** What kinda wet? ;)

**Nishinoya:** I know how you could cheer him up ;;;;;)))))

**Asahi:** Noya stop

**Akaashi:** Don’t touch my Kenma, Kuroo

**Bokuto:** YOUR KENMA???

**Bokuto:** BABY :(

**Kuroo:** YOUR KENMA?

**Kuroo:** I THINK YOU MEAN MINE!

**Kenma:** Awww ew you love me

**Kuroo:** SO MUCH LITERALLY SO MUCH SO SO SO SO MUCH

**Kuroo:** MORE THAN AKAASHI 

**Kuroo:** SO MUCH MORE SO MUCH MORE AND I’LL KISS YOU A MILLION TIMES RIGHT NOW TO PROVE IT

**Akaashi:** Guess I was right haha

**Kenma:** Whatever

**Akaashi:** You owe me coffee 

**Daichi:** What

**Bokuto:** A COFFEE DATE???:(

**Kuroo:** WHAT

**Kenma:** I didn’t think Kuro got jealous that easily

**Kenma:** Akaashi thought he did, so we made a bet with coffee

**Kenma:** I guess he does 

**Kuroo:** SO THAT WAS A LIE??

**Kuroo:** WHAT ELSE IS A LIE?? ARE YOUR TEARS EVEN REAL??

**Kenma:** YES IDIOT

**Akaashi:** So now you’re trying to invalidate his feelings because of a joke that he made with his best friend months ago?

**Akaashi:** Terrible boyfriend.

**Kuroo:** THAT’S ENOUGH FROM YOU

**Kenma:** Lolol

**Hinata:** Akaashi do you actually think Kuroo is a bad boyfriend?

**Akaashi:** No. I just think he’s an idiot who’s easy to pick on

**Kuroo:** LEAVE ME ALONE

**Kuroo:** At least I don’t cry to the stay alive reprise

**Kenma:** Shut up and come comfort me

**Akaashi:** You left his side when he was crying?

**Kuroo:** I WAS PEEING LEAVE ME ALONE

**Kuroo:** I HATE EVERYONE HERE

-

**Oikawa:** Guys!

**Oikawa:** Question!

**Nishinoya:** Yes?

**Oikawa:** Is it weird for me to ask Iwa-chan to put lotion on my legs?

**Daichi:** No?

**Hinata:** Yes

**Oikawa:** Shouyou grow up and realize that your opinion doesn’t matter

**Kageyama:** Hey.

**Asahi:** I mean I guess it could be kinda weird

**Oikawa:** We’re dating.

**Daichi:** If you’re going to get so defensive when someone disagrees with you then why did you ask a groupchat?

**Oikawa:** Because I’m right?

**Akaashi:** I don’t think it’s weird

**Kenma:** Kuro puts lotion on my legs all the time

**Kenma:** And sometimes he’ll shave my legs if I ask

**Hinata:** You shave your legs?

**Kenma:** Yeah

**Hinata:** Why?

**Kenma:** Idk what you want me to say Shouyou

**Akaashi:** Bokuto shaves my legs for me too

**Kenma:** Soulmate tingz

**Akaashi:** Soulmate tingz

**Bokuto:** Akaashi why am I not your soulmate 😔

**Kenma:** Because I’m already his soulmate. Accept it and move on.

**Oikawa:** I think you’re all straying from the original point

**Oikawa:** Me. Being right

**Iwaizumi:** I’m not putting lotion on your legs

**Oikawa:** WHY IWA-CHAN

**Iwaizumi:** I have to leave in a few minutes

**Oikawa:** IT WON’T TAKE LONG??

**Oikawa:** PLEASE IWA-CHAN I’M SO TIRED

**Iwaizumi:** I won’t want to leave if I do

**Oikawa:** What do you want from me?

**Oikawa:** Do you hate me?

**Sugawara:** I- 

**Sugawara:** If you don’t understand what he’s trying to say to you then idk what to say

**Iwaizumi:** And why did you assume I thought it was weird when I literally just said no?

**Oikawa:** Idk! 

**Oikawa:** Stop yelling at me!

**Iwaizumi:** I’m literally not

**Oikawa:** You hate me!!

**Sugawara:** Why are you being like this

**Iwaizumi:** Oh my god

**Iwaizumi:** You’re going to make me late to class

**Oikawa:** If you loved me you would skip class

**Iwaizumi:** You are so shitty

**Oikawa:** Rude!

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan come put lotion on my legs 

**Nishinoya:** Yeah iwa-chan

**Nishinoya:** go rail him to stitches too

**Oikawa** has left the chat

-

**Tanaka:** Hey guys

**Nishinoya:** RYU!

**Tanaka:** YUU!

**Tanaka:** Anyway idk why but I randomly thought of this

**Tanaka:** Remember when Shouyou said he was straight?

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA

**Sugawara:** HE WAS SO INSISTENT 

**Hinata:** Shut up

**Oikawa:** He had a dream about Tobio kissing him and that’s what made him realize he wasn’t

**Sugawara:** WHAT HAHAHA

**Nishinoya:** SHOUYOU HAHA

**Kageyama:** You did?

**Hinata:** SHUT UP I DON’T KNOW WHY WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THIS

**Kenma:** Lol poor shouyou

**Kenma:** Getting picked on because you didn’t have your sexuality figured out..

**Kenma:** You guys are bullies.

**Kenma:** Anyway remember when Kuro thought he was straight?

**Sugawara:** I-

**Kuroo:** Shut up Kenma

**Bokuto:** Kuroo thought he was straight?

**Bokuto:** LMAO

**Kuroo:** SHUT UP BOKUTO

**Bokuto:** NO YOU SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** YOU SHUT UP

**Akaashi:** That’s enough of that

**Sugawara:** I want a story!!!

**Nishinoya:** Story time story time story time story time

**Kenma:** When we were in high school he was dating this girl for like a year and a half

**Kenma:** And I was like Kuro, break up with her

**Kenma:** You’re in love with me

**Kenma:** And he always just laughed

**Kuroo:** IT MADE ME SO NERVOUS

**Kuroo:** YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW NERVOUS I WAS TO BE AROUND YOU ALL THE TIME

**Kuroo:** SHE ALWAYS WANTED TO HANG OUT WITH ME AND I JUST ALWAYS WANTED TO HANG OUT WITH YOU

**Kuroo:** AND YOU’RE MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN SHE WAS AND I COULDN’T GET IT OUT OF MY HEAD

**Sugawara:** That’s so cute

**Kenma:** Yeah but then it gets not cute because he broke up with her and started dating Daichi

**Kenma:** And this idiot goes

**Kenma:** ‘kenma you’re right i’m not straight’

**Kenma:** Idiot I didn’t SAY YOU WEREN’T

**Kenma:** I JUST SAID YOU WERE IN LOVE WITH ME

**Hinata:** Wait I remember that

**Oikawa:** Me too

**Oikawa:** Is that when you called me crying about Daichi?

**Kenma:** I don’t know what you’re talking about

**Kuroo:** YOU CALLED OIKAWA CRYING OVER IT??

**Oikawa:** He called me crying and kept being like

**Oikawa:** ‘Daichi sucks’ ‘Daichi isn’t here with him everyday’ ‘Daichi doesn’t know him as well as I do’ and i was like who is that and what the fuck are you even talking about

**Oikawa:** AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME

**Kenma:** IT WAS EMBARRASSING

**Oikawa:** THEN WHY DID YOU CALL

**Kenma:** YOUR STUPID VOICE MAKES ME FEEL BETTER

**Oikawa:** AWWW

**Kenma:** AND WHY DO YOU REMEMBER QUOTES FROM A PHONE CALL FROM HIGH SCHOOL

**Oikawa:** I HAVE A GOOD MEMORY AND ALSO IT WAS SUCH A MYSTORY THAT IT STUCK WITH ME

**Kenma:** IF YOU HAVE SUCH A GOOD MEMORY THEN WHY CAN’T YOU SPELL MYSTERY RIGHT

**Oikawa:** SHUT UP???

**Kuroo:** WAIT YOU WERE CRYING???

**Daichi:** Shut up Kuroo. Leave him alone

**Kuroo:** Yes sir yes sir yes sir

**Kenma:** Don’t talk to him like that

**Sugawara:** Don’t talk to him like that 

**Nishinoya:** Oooooh, sensitive topic

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!! Also omg the daichi/kuroo finally has context 😳


	43. I LITERALLY CANT STOP LAUGHING AT MYSELF BECAUSE IM UGLY AS FUCK LIKE WHAT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iwaizumi: I’ll kill you
> 
> Iwaizumi: I want you all to fuck off

**Akaashi** changed the group name to  _ Kinda sad. Might just wait around for Bokuto to get off of work so he can make me feel better and cuddle with me _

**Akaashi:** Bokuto has worked overtime

**Akaashi:** for the past two weekends

**Akaashi:** I miss him

**Sugawara:** Aw I’m sorry Akaashi :-(

**Akaashi:** It’s fine. I’ll just die alone

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI I’LL BE HOME IN 30 MINUTES I TOLD YOU THIS

**Akaashi:** So much could happen in 30 minutes

**Akaashi:** I could die alone

**Bokuto:** AH DON’T DIE PLEASE I’LL BE THERE SOON

**Sugawara:** lmaoooo

**Oikawa:** I always thought Bokuto was the needy one

**Akaashi:** It works both ways 🥰🥰

**Akaashi:** I’m so dependent on him it’s ugly

**Bokuto:** iTS NOT UGLY STOP

**Sugawara:** So cute omg

**Akaashi:** This is random but I’m just thinking about Kageyama and the fact that no one here deserves him

**Hinata:** He’s literally my boyfriend

**Akaashi:** No one deserves Kageyama 

**Hinata:** What did I ever do to you

**Akaashi:** Nothing 🥰

**Kenma:** Akaashi I CANNOT BREATHE

**Kenma:** CAN YOU CALM DOWN

**Akaashi:** Everyone check my Spotify and listen to my playlists because I have great taste in music

**Daichi:** You are being so scary

**Kuroo:** What are you even talking about anymore

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI I HAVE DINNER TOO I FORGOT TO TELL YOU

**Akaashi:** hurry hurry hurry hurry hurry

**-**

**Bokuto:** _ Attached image _

**Bokuto:** Everyone stop worrying. Akaashi is in my arms and now happy again

**Sugawara:** WHY ARE YOU GUYS SO CUTE

**Akaashi:** I just missed him so much

**Kenma:** he was working overtime for two weekends

**Akaashi:** I was touch starved

**Kuroo:** for 2 days??

**Bokuto:** HE WAS TOUCH STARVED LEAVE HIM ALONE

**Oikawa:** Kuroo and Kenma sure are being critical when they’re just as bad

**Iwaizumi:** Idiot, you’re just the same. I practically live with you

**Oikawa:** BECAUSE I WOULD DIE WITHOUT YOU AND YOU KNOW IT

**Oikawa:** WHO IS GONNA TELL ME IM NOT UGLY

**Oikawa:** WHO IS GONNA REMIND ME TO EAT EVERY DAY

**Iwaizumi:** you just proved my point?

**Oikawa:** I think you want to break up with me.

-

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  _ I CANT STOP LAUGHING BECAUSE KENMA EXISTS _

**Kuroo:** I cant breathe

**Kuroo:** I CANT STOP LAUGHING

**Kuroo:** I was listening to Who Lives Who Dies Who Tells Your Story RIGHT

**Kenma:** stop

**Kuroo:** And Eliza goes

**Kuroo:** She’s buried in Trinity church near you

**Kuroo:** So I tell Kenma we should go to Trinity church when we visit America. So we can see the Schuylers and Hamilton’s

**Kuroo:** as a joke

**Kenma:** ew Kuroo stop

**Kuroo:** he got so uncomfortable HE STARTED CRYING

**Sugawara:** OMG EW EW EW I CAN VISIT THEIR GRAVES THATS SO WEIRD THATS SO WEIRD

**Kuroo:** YES AHAHAH AND LIKE I TOOK IT FURTHER

**Kuroo:** AND ASKED IF HE WANTED TO GO ON A HISTORICAL FIGURE GRAVE TOUR

**Kuroo:** IMAGINE GOING TO LIKE GEORGE WASHINGTON’S GRAVE LIKE THATS SO WEIRD

**Kenma:** IT IS WEIRD AND I WANT TO CRY

**Sugawara:** do you have some sort of attachment to him or??

**Kenma:** NO BUT THATS WEIRD HES JUST DEAD AND WE CAN VISIT THAT LIKE HES SO DEAD

**Kenma:** THEYRE REAL PEOPLE JUST DEAD. THEYVE BEEN DEAD FOR SO LONG I WANT TO CRY IM UNCOMFORTABLE 

**Kuroo:** HAHAAHAH PLEASE KENMA COME WITH ME TO VISIT THOMAS JEFFERSON’S GRAVE

**Kenma:** you don’t love me

**Kenma:** you just like making me cry

**Kuroo:** I do love you

**Kuroo:** you’re just so weird

**Daichi:** why is that making you cry wtf

**Kenma:** Just think about it

**Kenma:** ITS UNCOMFORTABLE LIKE THEY WOULD HVE BEEN SO OLD IM SCARED

**Kenma:** IM SO SO SCARED

**Kenma:** IM TERRIFIED IM GONNA CRY

**Sugawara:** Daichi, let's get married at John Laurens' grave 😍😍

**Daichi:** Sounds like a plan🥰😘😘

**Sugawara:** How romantic

**-**

**Sugawara:** Daichi is in the shower 🙃

**Tsukishima:** And?

**Sugawara:** and he didn’t wait for me to shower with him🙃🙃

**Tsukishima:** Ew

**Tsukishima:** This is why I never check this chat

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki, they’re in love!!! 😤😤😤 

**Tsukishima:** They’re gross and I hate them

**Sugawara:** You do not hate me!

**Sugawara:** Tsukki you love me

**Sugawara:** I’m your mother after all

**Tsukishima:** Stop that

**Sugawara:** My son is so rude

**Kageyama:** why are you being so mean to Suga

**Sugawara:** Kageyama! My favorite son!!

**Tsukishima:** He’s too horny

**Nishinoya:** He’s not horny ENOUGH!

**Nishinoya:** uP THE HORNY LEVELS SUGA

**Sugawara:** YOURE RIGHT BRB I'M GONNA GO TAKE A SHOWER

-

**Oikawa and Iwaizumi**

**Oikawa:** I can’t believe you left me T^T

**Iwaizumi:** It’s not for that long

**Iwaizumi:** I’m sorry :-(

**Oikawa:** I can’t stop thinking of you… and I wish you were here

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Iwaizumi:** Dammit Tooru, I’m at my parents house idiot

**Iwaizumi:** _ attached image _

_ I CANT STOP LAUGHING BECAUSE KENMA EXISTS _

**Bokuto:** Akaashi is doing a face mask

**Bokuto:** And I’m gonna do one with him

**Akaashi:** when he takes care of his skin🥰

**Asahi:** I had to change all of Noya’s skin care products when I saw his bathroom

**Nishinoya:** It wasn’t that bad :(

**Asahi:** a bar of soap is not face wash

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Nishinoya:** NICE OIKAWA NICE

**Sugawara:** Oikawa 🥵🤤🤤

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Iwaizumi:** YOU'RE SUCH AN IDIOT OIKAWA 

**Oikawa:** NO NO NO 

**Oikawa:** NO ONE LOOK THOSE WERE FOR IWA-CHAN

**Kuroo:** Don’t be shy Iwa-Chan, send some back

**Kuroo:** also, Oikawa 😍😍

**Iwaizumi:** Fuck off and stop looking at it

**Tanaka:** YOUVE HAD ALL THAT ASS THIS ENTIRE TIME WHY ISN’T IT NOTICABLE IN PERSON

**Oikawa:** I’m so embarrassed I WANT TO DIE

**Oikawa:** WHAT HEY WTF TANAKA

**Iwaizumi:** Death🙃

**Kenma:** I thought you don’t like talking about sexual things

**Oikawa:** I DONT LIKE TALKING ABOUT MY SEX LIFE IN THE GROUPCHAT

**Hinata:** but you sent nudes here

**Oikawa:** THEY WERE MEANT FOR IWA-CHAN NOT THE WHOLE GROUP

**Akaashi:** So many nudes through text. Do you not have snap?

**Oikawa:** WHY ARE YOU ALL ATTACKING ME AND IDK IT JUST HAPPENED

**Kageyama:** wow Oikawa

**Oikawa:** TOBIO SHUT UP

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA SHUT UP

**Oikawa:** DO I THANK YOU GUYS OR DO I BREAK MY PHONE AND DROWN MYSELF

**Kuroo:** We should thank you

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll kill you

**Iwaizumi:** I want you all to fuck off


	44. I'm living in a loop but the loop is Hamilton so basically I'm in hell and I'm scared

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: It’s relatable
> 
> Kenma: Teehee am I right?
> 
> Hinata: No

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ I’m really the ugliest bitch out here and you guys just let me exist _

**Daichi:** :(

**Daichi:** Suga you aren’t ugly at all stop that

**Sugawara:** My iphone says otherwise

**Daichi:** Wut

**Sugawara:** My new phone just revealed that I LOOK LIKE A WITCH

**Sugawara:** Not even a cool witch

**Sugawara:** AN UGLY WITCH

**Daichi:** You don’t

**Sugawara:** BUT I DO

**Daichi:** You’re NOT UGLY

**Sugawara:** I’d rather die 

**Sugawara:** I’d rather die than have you lie to my FACE

**Sugawara:** My stupid ugly face

**Daichi:** You’re so stupid sometimes

**Sugawara:** If only someone would kiss my stupid ugly hideous face

**Sugawara:** It would make me feel better

**Nishinoya:** omw

**Tanaka:** omw

**Oikawa:** omw

**Akaashi:** omw

**Sugawara:** If only that someone was Daichi

**Daichi:** omw

-

**Kenma:** I forgot I existed 

**Hinata:** wut

**Oikawa:** Literally how

**Kenma:** I was doing laundry

**Kenma:** And then I stopped existing for a few seconds

**Kenma:** But I’m back

**Akaashi:** You sound insane

**Kenma:** Stop that

**Oikawa:** You’re literally crazy, you’re insane

**Kenma:** I’m literally not I just stopped existing

**Kenma:** It’s relatable

**Kenma:** Teehee am I right?

**Hinata:** No

**Nishinoya:** I want Suzu

**Nishinoya:** GONE

**Kenma:** you take that back

**Nishinoya:** No, never

**Asahi:** Noya she is SLEEPING

**Nishinoya:** ON MY PILLOW

**Asahi:** That’s my pillow

**Nishinoya:** No no no no no

**Nishinoya:** When I sleep over

**Nishinoya:** That is MY PILLOW AND YOU KNOW IT

**Asahi:** Let her sleep

**Asahi:** You always sleep on my chest anyways

**Nishinoya:** Fine

**Nishinoya:** She’s lucky this time

**Hinata:** awww

**Kenma:** Give me suzu give me suzu

**Kuroo:** Don’t give him Suzu

**Kenma:** 😧

**Hinata:** eyebrows yessss

**Kuroo:** KENMA YOU JUST FORGOT YOU EXISTED YOU DO NOT NEED A CAT

**Kenma:** We’re breaking up

**Kenma:** I will gladly take Suzu off of your hands Nishinoya 

**Asahi:** We aren’t giving Suzu away

**Nishinoya:** Yet

**Asahi:** EVER

**Kenma:** 😧

**Hinata:** Eyebrows nice! Keep up the good work

**Kenma:** Kuroo my heart is BROMKEN COME HUG ME

**Oikawa:** I want out of this chat

**Kageyama:** You can’t leave

**Hinata:** Ever 🙂

**Oikawa:** You’re all so scary and I hate it and i want to leave

**Hinata:** Go ahead and try

**Hinata:** You won’t get far 🙂

-

**Oikawa:** I really just wanna

**Oikawa:** Cover my ass in paint and pop a squat on a canvas

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan would you put that on your wall

**Iwaizumi:** Would I put your paint covered ass on my wall?

**Oikawa:** Yes. One of my thighs will also be on it

**Iwaizumi:** I guess, yeah

**Oikawa:** YES OMG OMG OMG I’M GONNA GO BUY A CANVAS HAHA

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN I LOVE YOU ❤️

**Iwaizumi:** Ew

**Oikawa:** WHY ARE YOU LIKE THAT TO ME

**Iwaizumi: ❤️**

**Oikawa:** ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

**Tsukishima:** Don’t your parents visit?

**Iwaizumi:** Yeah but I can just put it in the closet until they leave

**Kenma:** imagine wanting oikawa's ass on your wall

**Iwaizumi:** Lol he wants it there so it’s fine

**Sugawara:** A MAN A MAN A MAN DAICHI CAN I SIT ON A CANVAS AND GIVE IT TO YOU

**Daichi:** Sure!

**Sugawara:** Look at that enthusiasm 🤤

**Tsukishima:** I don't understand you guys

**Hinata:** You guys are just gonna have that on a wall

**Hinata:** Like, it’s just gonna be there

**Iwaizumi:** Yes

**Daichi:** Yes

**Hinata:** I-

**Hinata:** Okay

**Kageyama:** Oikawa said pop a squat

**Kageyama:** Is no one gonna talk about that?

**Tanaka:** HAHAHH WTF I DIDN’T EVEN NOTICE

**-**

**Sugawara:** It’s midnight forty two and I can’t stop putting lip gloss on

**Kenma:** Midnight forty two

**Sugawara:** Lip Gloss  **😍**

**Sugawara:** Late night lip gloss 😍

**Sugawara:** I want to get lip gloss on Daichi’s dick

**Daichi:** KOUSHI

**Kuroo:** So shameless 

**Nishinoya:** HAHAH WHERE DID THAT EVEN COME FROM

**Nishinoya:** SUGA YES HAHA

**Sugawara:** Just an urge I guess ☺️

**Sugawara:** Just me? Haha

**Sugawara:** Kuroo don’t even say anything

**Kuroo:** 😇


	45. i don't know why this entire episode is kuroken but it is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: I’m shaking I’m crying I just want my Kenma 
> 
> Kuroo: Kenma
> 
> Kuroo: Kenma Kenma Kenma Kenma

**Kenma** changed the group name to  _ I’m dying _

**Oikawa:** Dying?

**Kenma:** Yes.

**Sugawara:** Sounds serious

**Kenma:** IT IS

**Akaashi:** Hmmm. 

**Akaashi:** Anyway, what did you guys do today?

**Kenma:** I’M DYING

**Kenma:** AND YOU’RE ALL GOING TO DISMISS IT?

**Hinata:** Kageyama and I went on a date!

**Sugawara:** Oooh! That’s so cute! Where?

**Oikawa:** Tobio!!! Where did you take my Shouyou??

**Kageyama:** We just went out to eat

**Hinata:** But first we walked around, and then after we got ice cream together! And then played volleyball!

**Daichi:** Are you guys just always playing?

**Hinata:** Yes! Kageyama always wants to play when we go out

**Kageyama:** You’re the one who always brings the ball??

**Oikawa:** You two are so …. 

**Iwaizumi:** Cute?

**Oikawa:** No, not that

**Hinata:** Say cute

**Oikawa:** No

**Nishinoya:** Say cute

**Oikawa:** I’M NOT GIVING INTO PEER PRESSURE

**Oikawa:** I’ll NEVER call anything involving Tobio cute!

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** Here’s us at the park!

**Sugawara:** Omg..

**Sugawara:** Daichi I’m going to cry

**Sugawara:** Look at them

**Daichi:** I know, I know

**Iwaizumi:** Awww

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa said they’re cute

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan! Traitor!

**Kenma:** EXCUSE ME THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ABOUT ME!

**Oikawa:** Who are you? Me?

**Kenma:** Shut up! I’m dying!

**Kenma:** And Kuro hasn’t answered me all day! 

**Kenma:** I miss him! So much! I haven’t heard his voice since yesterday!

**Kenma:** What if he died?

**Kenma:** What if he’s stuck somewhere?

**Kenma:** What if he broke his phone? And has no way of contacting me?

**Kenma:** What if he got kidnapped?

**Kenma:** What if he drowned? He can’t swim!

**Kenma:** What if he’s ghosting me?

**Kenma:** I don’t think he would ghost me

**Kenma:** What if he’s in the hospital?

**Kenma:** What if he got into a terrible train accident underneath a tunnel in the middle of the country and they can’t get him or the other passengers out?

**Kenma:** What if he got into a plane crash?

**Kenma:** What if he got into a plane crash and the plane went into the ocean and there’s no way of determining the survivors even though there could be? Maybe?

**Kenma:** But that would also fall into the he drowned scenario as well

**Sugawara:** Omg Kenma. Stop 

**Kenma:** But I’m here SUFFERING and he isn’t here to take care of me!

**Oikawa:** Kenma I didn’t realize you were so needy

**Kenma:** I’m not needy, shut up

**Sugawara:** You’re needy

**Akaashi:** Why are you suffering?

**Kenma:** I went outside for 30 minutes

**Kenma:** 30 MINUTES

**Kenma:** And now my legs are COATED AND I MEAN COATED with mosquito bites

**Kuroo:** Did someone say kenma’s legs?

**Kuroo:** I’ve been dreaming about them all day 😍🥰

**Nishinoya:** Do you have a leg fetish?

**Kuroo:** No, you freak, his legs just get me like 😰😰🤯🤯🥵🥵

**Kuroo:** Like he’s so beautiful 

**Kuroo:** Head empty just Kenma and his beautiful, sexy legs 🥰 🥵

**Kuroo:** AND HIS HIPS

**Kuroo:** Perfect

**Kuroo:** Perfect for me to grab

**Kuroo:** AND HIS ASS?

**Kuroo:** Omg Kenma’s ass 🤯😳😋🍴

**Nishinoya:** YES KUROO 

**Oikawa:** Oh my god stop, you freak

**Kenma:** Kuro you’re back

**Kuroo:** I am, sorry! I’ve been helping Bokuto paint my room

**Sugawara:** Sorry I need to read that again

**Sugawara:** Do you mean he’s been helping YOU paint your room?

**Kuroo:** No. I said what I said

**Kenma:** Akaashi! Our boyfriends were spending all day together and left us alone!

**Kuroo:** Akaashi was there

**Kenma:** Why wasn’t I invited?

**Akaashi:** You were

**Kuroo:** I asked you if you wanted to come

**Kuroo:** You said no

**Kenma:** WELL

**Kenma:** You always put paint hand prints on my butt when you’re painting around me

**Kuroo:** I’m just claiming what’s mine 😌

**Kuroo:** Speaking of what’s mine

**Kuroo:** Your legs!

**Kuroo:** I read the chat. Do you want me to come over? I can help you feel better

**Kenma:** Yes pls

**Yamaguchi:** Why do you just say different parts of Kenma are yours?

**Tsukishima:** Because he’s a freak, Tadashi. Look away

**Kuroo:** Excuse me

-

**Kuroo:** It is 8pm

**Kuroo:** And kenma won‘t stop yawning 

**Kuroo:** Baby it’s so early 

**Kuroo:** What have you even done today

**Kenma:** So much!

**Kenma:** I was so busy

**Kuroo:** You sat on the couch with Akaashi and played mario kart

**Kenma:** We did more than that

**Kuroo:** Oh, sorry, you also watched TV

**Kenma:** Shut up Kuro

**Kuroo:** No

**Kuroo:** It’s cute tho he looks like a cat

**Kenma:** I’m leaving I’m going to sleep at my own apartment 

**Kuroo:** WAIT NO

**Akaashi:** It’s what you deserve 

**Kuroo:** BUTT OUT AKAASHI

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Sugawara:** It’s what you deserve 

**Kuroo:** STOP

**Kuroo:** BUT OUTT SUGA

**Nishinoya:** haha you’re so flustered that you mixed up the t’s 

**Kuroo:** STOP

**Oikawa:** God, Kenma come get your man

**Oikawa:** He’s annoying as fuck

**Kenma:** No! I’m at my apartment now

**Sugawara:** Doesn’t he literally live next door?

**Oikawa:** Yes lol

**Oikawa:** They’re ridiculous

**Kuroo:** Kenma let me in I’m crying

**Kuroo:** I’m shaking I’m crying I just want my Kenma 

**Kuroo:** Kenma

**Kuroo:** Kenma Kenma Kenma Kenma

**Kuroo:** Baby

**Kuroo:** Kitten

**Kuroo:** Kittennnnn

**Kuroo:** KENMA PLS

**Tsukishima:** Shut up

**Kuroo:** I’M IN

**Daichi:** Thrilling

**Sugawara:** Exhilarating 

**Nishinoya:** Soooo exciting

**Oikawa:** Amazing

**Kuroo:** He’s still acting like he’s mad

**Kuroo:** I’m gonna eat his ass

**Akaashi:** Nice

**Bokuto:** YESSSS

**Nishinoya:** YESS NICE NICE NICE

**Sugawara:** YES KUROO

**Oikawa:** Disgusting

-

**Oikawa:** Do you guys ever think about Kuroo and Kenma?

**Tsukishima:** No.

**Sugawara:** I only think about Kuroo when I have to

**Kuroo:** All the time 🥰😍😍

**Kuroo:** We’re just so great 😍🥰

**Akaashi:** Why are you thinking about them?

**Oikawa:** Why do you ask so many questions?

**Akaashi:** You’re all weirdos and I’m just trying to understand 

**Oikawa:** Idk I was sitting in bed 

**Oikawa:** And Iwa-chan was asleep and laying on me so he wasn’t entertaining me

**Sugawara:** Why do you act like that’s all he exists for

**Oikawa:** Because it is

**Sugawara:** He’s just going to read that when he wakes up

**Oikawa:** Actually Iwa-chan doesn’t read that chat when he’s been gone for a while

**Oikawa:** He says it’s bc it’s full of idiot nonsense 🥰

**Kageyama:** I don’t understand the emoji but ok

**Oikawa:** Not everything is about you Tobio

**Oikawa:** Anyway I was bored and in bed and scrolling through Instagram 

**Oikawa:** And Kuroo posted pics of them together and I literally sat there and went through his entire account 

**Kuroo:** AND LIKED AND COMMENTED ON EVERYTHING. IT WAS HORRIBLE

**Oikawa:** Idk why you’re mad at me, I gave you my attention 🤷🏻‍♀️✨

**Oikawa:** Anyway?? Their height difference? Is so dramatic???

**Oikawa:** Cute

**Oikawa:** Kuroo just being so obnoxious 

**Kuroo:** HEY!

**Oikawa:** And Kenma just being so cute??

**Oikawa:** They’re so cute I can’t stop thinking about them

**Hinata:** My height difference with Kageyama is like that

**Hinata:** When I kiss him I have to get on my toes and he still has to lean down

**Kuroo:** THAT’S THE BEST THAT’S THE BEST

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI AND I ARE LIKE THAT

**Oikawa:** Cool. No one asked

**Nishinoya:** You’re just mad because you don’t have a cute height difference ✨

**Oikawa:** Excuse me, my iwa-Chan is shorter than me and I think we’re perfect 

**Sugawara:** He’s literally shorter by two inches

**Sugawara:** Calm down

**Oikawa:** Daichi I’m gonna fight your boyfriend

**Daichi:** Okay

**Sugawara:** ??!!!

**Sugawara:** Just ‘okay’???!!!!

**Sugawara:** No ‘don’t touch my precious Koushi or I’ll kill you with a shovel’ ??????

**Kuroo:** Why'd you have to get so specific with that

**Sugawara:** I’m betrayed! I’m heartbroken! 

**Daichi:** You’re literally laying on me right now. I think you’re fine

**Sugawara:** I’m pissed off 

**Sugawara:** You aren’t doing enough for me 💔

**Daichi:** Ok. Oikawa don’t fight Suga. Is that better?

**Sugawara:** Well you could also be touching my ass 

**Oikawa:** Suga I hate you 

**Nishinoya:** Yessss horny Suga!!!!

**Sugawara:** Always happy to please my fans 💖💋

**Sugawara:** Now if only Daichi would please me.. 😳

**Tsukishima:** wow


	46. I’m scary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi: So everyone is allowed to be horny but I’m not

**Hinata** changed the group name to  _ Kageyama is over party _

**Kuroo:** He IS NOT

**Bokuto:** NO NO NO

**Hinata:** he’s cancelled

**Bokuto:** There is no way that’s happening

**Hinata:** well it is 

**Tsukishima:** You’re an idiot

**Tsukishima:** Literally so dumb

**Asahi:** It’s kind of cute that Tsukishima is always on Kageyama’s side

**Tsukishima:** Please don’t say gross things like that

**Hinata:** Kageyama took Natsu to the park

**Sugawara:** How sweet 🥰

**Hinata:** NO BECAUSE HE DIDN’T TAKE ME

**Kageyama:** Idiot, you said you were doing homework

**Hinata:** STILL

**Iwaizumi:** god you’re like Oikawa

**Oikawa:** Hey!!

**Hinata:** I just wanted you to push me on the swings🥺 

**Kageyama:** We can go tomorrow morning?

**Hinata:** I want to sleep innnnnnn

**Kageyama:** Well, then idk. We can go later in the day?

**Hinata:** I need to go to the store

**Kageyama:** Omg idk what to tell you

**Oikawa:** He will never be satisfied

**Oikawa:** I will never be satisfied

**Kuroo:** And then it’s The Story of Tonight reprise

**Kenma:** u are the ugliest 

**Kuroo:** Are you gonna cry to that reprise too?

**Kenma:** ur dead too me

**Oikawa:** too me

**Hinata:** Well Kageyama, I guess you just have to buy me ice cream to make up for it

**Kageyama:** what

**Hinata:** Well Kageyama, I guess you just have to sleep over to make up for it

**Kageyama:** okay

**Hinata:** Well Kageyama, I guess you’ll just have to kiss me to make up for it 

**Kageyama:** okay

**Hinata:** THAT'S ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY TO ME???

**Kageyama:** IM PACKING MY STUFF TO SLEEP OVER CAN YOU STOP

**Tsukishima:** lol

-

**Oikawa:** Guys I just ate strawberry popcorn

**Akaashi:** was it good?

**Oikawa:** It tasted so cute!

**Daichi:** I…. 

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t know what it means either 

**Kenma:** Cute?

**Oikawa:** Yes omg it tasted cute! What more do you want from me

**Kenma:** I want you to make sense because you sound stupid

**Bokuto:** You've never had something that tasted cute before?

**Kenma:** No because I’m not weird

**Kuroo:** Kenma’s ass🥰🥰🥰

**Kenma:** Bitch

**Bokuto:** HAHAHA NO NO NO I'VE TASTED CUTE THINGS

**Bokuto:** Like um

**Bokuto:** Akaashi likes lavender iced lattes and those taste cute

**Akaashi:** I see

**Oikawa:** YES LAVENDER TASTES SO CUTE

**Kenma:** I still think you’re crazy

**Oikawa:** IM PERFECTLY SANE BOKUTO KNOWS WHAT I MEAN

**Kenma:** Yeah but literally that’s Bokuto

**Bokuto:** KENMA WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

**Kenma:** That you’re a freak

**Bokuto:** NOOO KENMA PLEASE

**Kuroo:** LMAOOO

**Oikawa:** ANYWAYS

**Oikawa:** _ Attached image _

**Iwaizumi:** Idiot why would you send that

**Oikawa:** Because it looks great on your wall

**Iwaizumi:** That doesn’t mean they need to see it

**Oikawa:** IT’S ART IWA-CHAN

**Iwaizumi:** IT'S YOUR ASS IDIOT THEY DON'T NEED TO SEE IT

**Oikawa:** EITHER WAY MY ASS LOOKS INCREDIBLE UP ON IWA-CHAN’S WALL

**Oikawa:** immaculate to say the least and they’ve already seen my ass soooo… 

**Sugawara:** Iwaizumi gets jealous so easily lol

**Kuroo:** coming from you

**Sugawara:** I was gonna say it’s cute BUT I HATE YOU KUROO YOU RUINED IT

**Daichi:** Please stop bullying Suga. Whenever you bring up his jealousy he refuses to hold my hand because he’s angry

**Sugawara:** Yeah because you held someone's hand before mine

**Daichi:** Suga what does that mean

**Sugawara:** Literally name someone better than me

**Daichi:** I can’t

**Sugawara:** NOT KUROO 

**Sugawara:** NOT YUI

**Daichi:** Okay I understand the Kuroo thing but why is it always Yui

**Kuroo:** THIS IS HAPPENING

**Kenma:** You started this

**Kuroo:** you hate me

**Kenma:** Yes

**Akaashi:** lmaooo imagine Kenma hating you

**Kenma:** 😍

**Akaashi:** 😍

**Kenma:** I could never hate Akaashi

**Kuroo:** Stop that

**Akaashi:** you stop that

-

**Yamaguchi:** You say our love is draining 

**Yamaguchi:** and you can’t go on

**Yamaguchi:** You’ll be the one complaining when I’m gone

**Oikawa:** Hamilton again?

**Yamaguchi:** Wait wait wait wait I promise it’ll be good

**Tsukishima:** You are terrifying 

**Yamaguchi:** And no, don’t change the subject.

**Yamaguchi:** cuz you’re my favorite subject

**Yamaguchi:** My sweet, submissive subject

**Yamaguchi:** That’s me 

**Yamaguchi:** I’m the sweet submissive subject

**Tsukishima:** … 

**Tsukishima:** Wow

**Oikawa:** All of that buildup

**Oikawa:** to make me vomit

**Yamaguchi:** So everyone is allowed to be horny but I’m not

**Oikawa:** No because you are an innocent cute little guy 

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi is not innocent

**Oikawa:** AHHHH NO DON’T SAY THAT

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi is not innocent

**Yamaguchi:** We were out

**Yamaguchi:** Like getting lunch

**Yamaguchi:** And this guy was being mean to me for no reason

**Yamaguchi:** And tSUKKI SAVED ME

**Yamaguchi:** He just stood up for me

**Yamaguchi:** He was gonna beat him up for me

**Tsukishima:** I wasn’t but okay

**Yamaguchi:** You were because you’re my hero and it was hot

**Tsukishima:** It wasn’t but okay

**Yamaguchi:** Can you just take my compliments and fuck my face

**Oikawa:** TADASHI

**Yamaguchi:** 😇

**Tsukishima:** You are so embarrassing 

**Yamaguchi:** no? 🥺🥺🥺

**Tsukishima:** I never said no

**Oikawa:** AHHH WHY IS NO ONE ELSE REPLYING TO YOU GUYS

**Oikawa:** WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE SEEING THIS

**Yamaguchi:** 😇😇😇

**Oikawa:** EWEW I HATE THINKING OF YOU LIKE THIS

**Nishinoya:** YES OMGOMG

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Tsukki fucks _


	47. I wrote this while listening to the phantom of the opera because i have taste

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: Hinata I don’t know how to answer you
> 
> Kuroo: Am I supposed to answer? Like am I supposed to give you the actual reason? What do you want from me
> 
> Akaashi: This is weird

_ Tsukki fucks _

**Hinata:** Kageyama brushed my hair for me today!

**Oikawa:** Okay??

**Hinata:** It was cute lol

**Kenma:** Kuro brushes my hair for me all the time

**Kenma:** Welcome to having a good boyfriend 😌

**Sugawara:** Daichi brushes my hair

**Sugawara:** And puts lotion on my legs 

**Sugawara:** And cooks for me

**Sugawara:** And sometimes he’ll even dress me if I ask

**Oikawa:** So he’s your slave

**Sugawara:** Oooh I like that!

**Daichi:** I don’t

**Sugawara:** Yeah, I don’t think I’d be able to boss you around like that

**Sugawara:** I can be your slave though

**Daichi:** Suga it’s too early for this

**Sugawara:** You just hate me

**Daichi:** Whatever. Come get your breakfast

**Sugawara:** Thank you slave 🥰

**Kenma:** One time Kuro brushed my teeth for me

**Oikawa:** That’s really weird Kenma

**Kenma:** Yeah it was a weird experience 

**Oikawa:** I hate thinking about you guys. You have no boundaries 

**Oikawa:** It’s so fucking weird

**Akaashi:** Weren’t you the one who was randomly thinking of them a while ago?

**Akaashi:** And obsessing over their height difference?

**Oikawa:** Yeah but 

**Oikawa:** Shut up

**Kenma:** Marry me Akaashi

**Akaashi:** I’m in love with you

**Kenma:** Heart eyes heart eyes heart eyes just for you

**Akaashi:** You’re my soulmate

**Kuroo:** Stop?

**Bokuto:** STOP

**Kenma:** Lol

**Kenma:** Anyway. Sorry we’re the superior couple, Tooru

**Sugawara:** I want to argue with you and say you’re not the superior couple but like

**Sugawara:** I don’t think Daichi would brush my teeth for me

**Daichi:** I wouldn’t

**Kenma:** That’s because Kuro is physically unable to say no to me

**Kuroo:** Lord show me how to say no to this

**Oikawa:** I DON’T KNOW HOW TO SAY NO TO THIS

**Kenma:** GOD SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** OH MY GOD SHE LOOKS SO HELPLESS

**Kenma:** I want to kill you

**Kuroo:** AND HER BODY’S SAYIN’ HELL YES

**Kenma:** Get out of my apartment

**Kuroo:** Nooo bby I’ll brush ur teeth for u

**Kenma:** STOP I DON’T WANT THAT

**Oikawa:** Who’s willing to bet that Kuroo’s chasing him around now

**Akaashi:** Definitely 

**Bokuto:** YESS KUROO GET THOSE TEETH

**Tsukishima:** You guys are insufferable 

-

**Sugawara:** ANGEL I HEAR YOU

**Sugawara:** SPEAK I LISTEN

**Sugawara:** STAY BY MY SIDE

**Sugawara:** GUIDE ME

**Daichi:** IT IS 5AM

**Daichi:** STOP SINGING PHANTOM OF THE OPERA AND GO TO BED

**Sugawara:** NO 

**Sugawara:** ANGEL MY SOUL WAS WEAK

**Sugawara:** FORGIVE ME

**Sugawara:** ENTER AT LAST 

**Sugawara:** MASTER!!

**Kenma:** Sugawara

**Kenma:** I’m going to PRETEND I didn’t just get woken up to phantom of the opera lyrics this early in the fucking morning

**Kenma:** I’m going to LOOK at Kuro sleeping next to me with his cute sleepy face

**Kenma:** And I’m going to find my inner calm 

**Kenma:** But if you keep spamming this chat and prevent me from falling asleep

**Kenma:** That inner calm might die in the fire of my fury ❤️

**Oikawa:** Scary Kenma

**Sugawara:** AHH SORRY KENMA 

-

**Akaashi:** _ attached image _

**Akaashi:** I did his makeup. What do you think?

**Kuroo:** KENMA WITH MAKEUP KENMA WITH MAKEUP

**Kuroo:** KENMA WITH MAKEUP

**Kuroo:** I CAN’T BREATHE

**Kuroo:** KENMA YOU LOOK SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL

**Kuroo:** KENMA KENMA KENMA I’M OBSESSED WITH YOU

**Kuroo:** I’M SO IN LOVE WITH YOU

**Kuroo:** I WANT TO MARRY YOU

**Kuroo:** PLEASE MARRY ME

**Kuroo:** YOU’RE MY SOULMATE

**Kuroo:** I WANT TO KISS YOU SO BAD 

**Kenma:** Kuro shut up omg

**Oikawa:** Kenma!!! You look so pretty!!!   
**Oikawa:** Almost as pretty as me 💖

**Kenma:** Aww look how you managed to ruin that sweet compliment 💖

**Sugawara:** Kenma!! You look very cute! 

**Sugawara:** Did you do that Akaashi?

**Akaashi:** Yes! I’ve been practicing but I wanted to try it out on someone else for once

**Kageyama:** Akaashi you wear makeup?

**Akaashi:** Sometimes. I usually only do it when I’m really bored

**Bokuto:** Akaashi I love when you do your makeup!!

**Akaashi:** I know. That’s why I always send you pictures when I do. ❤️

**Bokuto:** ❤️

**Sugawara:** Guys. Don’t

**Akaashi:** Don’t what?

**Sugawara:** Don’t be cute in front of me

**Sugawara:** Don’t be the cutest couple in this chat in front of me

**Bokuto:** Too late 😎 We’re the cutest couple ALWAYS 

**Kuroo:** And that’s on what?

**Bokuto:** PERIODT

**Oikawa:** EW LMAO

-

**Oikawa:** GUYS GUYS GUYS

**Oikawa:** GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS

**Kageyama:** What

**Oikawa:** SOMEONE ELSE SOMEONE ELSE

**Sugawara:** What?

**Oikawa:** GUESS WHAT IWA-CHAN BOUGHT ME

**Kuroo:** NIPPLE CLAMPS

**Oikawa:** WHY WOULD YOU GUESS THAT

**Oikawa:** NO

**Oikawa:** HE BOUGHT ME

**Oikawa:** DRUM ROLL PLEASE

**Hinata:** No

**Oikawa:** DRUM ROLL PLEASE

**Kenma:** No

**Oikawa:** HE BOUGHT ME ANIMAL CROSSING

**Kenma:** OMG WE CAN PLAY TOGETHER

**Oikawa:** OMG

**Kenma:** OMG

**Akaashi:** I could play with you guys too.

**Kageyama:** Me too!

**Oikawa:** OMG

**Oikawa:** OMG OMG OMG

**Oikawa:** YES

**Kuroo:** Aww look. It’s nerd Christmas.

**Sugawara:** NERD CHRISTMAS HAHA

**Oikawa:** Don’t say that to me ever again

-

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan is being mean to me 💔

**Kenma:** I’m sure you deserve it

**Oikawa:** I don’t!

**Tsukishima:** I’m sure you do

**Iwaizumi:** He won’t stop doing tik tok dances and he has so much homework due in a few hours

**Iwaizumi:** I’m just trying to look out for his grades

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi does that too. It’s so annoying

**Yamaguchi:** You love when I do tik tok dances!!

**Tsukishima:** I don’t

**Yamaguchi:** I’m never gonna throw it back for you again 😔

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan you can take my tik tok dances away from me when I’m dead

**Iwaizumi:** Stop being so dramatic

**Oikawa:** Also Yamaguchi we should do tik tok dances together!!

**Yamaguchi:** Yes!!!   
**Sugawara:** I WANNA JOIN

**Kuroo:** ME TOO

**Kuroo:** I always try to get Kenma to tik tok dance with me but he’s too good at throwing it back and it makes me feel inferior 

**Akaashi:** That’s because compared to Kenma everyone is inferior 

**Kenma:** Akaashi heart eyes heart eyes

**Akaashi:** Kenma heart eyes heart eyes

**Bokuto:** Why is this a new thing you guys do?

**Bokuto:** It’s so weird

**Kenma:** Don’t get jealous just because his double heart eyes aren’t for you ❤️

**Oikawa:** Sassy Kenma!! I love it

**Kuroo:** Me too 😳 Kenma come give me a lap dance

**Sugawara:** HAHAHA WHAT

**Daichi:** That’s a new one

-

**Kuroo:** omg

**Kuroo:** GAYS AND TANAKA

**Sugawara:** LMAO

**Kuroo:** Bokuto and I went out today and made the best purchases ever!

**Bokuto:** YES YES YES YES

**Bokuto:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Bokuto:** We bought Akaashi and Kenma crop tops!

**Sugawara:** OMG OMG

**Sugawara:** Did they come with those cute shorts?

**Bokuto:** Yes, they were sets!

**Sugawara:** Omg! Daichi, come with me to the store I want to get a crop top and shorts!

**Daichi:** Okay

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan I want a crop top!   
**Iwaizumi:** Then go buy one

**Oikawa:** Mean!

-

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan bought me a crop top!

**Sugawara:** YOU LOOK SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** Oikawa Tooru I’m gay for you

**Iwaizumi:** Hey.

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** Look at the one I got!

**Oikawa:** Suga!! So cute!!

**Oikawa:** Let’s be gay for each other!

**Sugawara:** Okay!

**Iwaizumi:** HEY

**Oikawa:** Awww jealous Iwa-chan

-

**Kuroo:** Hello! What are you all doing this fine Saturday?

**Bokuto:** I’m taking Akaashi to the movies!

**Akaashi:** Guess who’s gonna get handsy 😌

**Oikawa:** Don’t be a freak in public please 

**Akaashi:** Fine

**Sugawara:** Me and Daichi are just staying in

**Asahi:** Noya is with Tanaka so I’m hanging out with Suzu 

**Kenma:** Suzu!!! How is she?

**Asahi:** Good! 

**Asahi:** _ attached image _

**Kenma:** Ahhhhh so cute so cute so cute

**Hinata:** I’m playing volleyball with Kageyama!

**Hinata:** What are you doing Kuroo?

**Kuroo:** Taking my Kenma out on a date!!!

**Kuroo:** And then I’m gonna eat his ass 😋🥰

**Akaashi:** Nice

**Nishinoya:** NICE KUROO

**Hinata:** Why do you talk about eating his ass so much?

**Kuroo:** What can I say, I love what I do 😔

**Kuroo:** Wrong emoji but whatever

**Hinata:** Why?

**Kuroo:** Why.. What?

**Hinata:** Why do you like eating his ass?

**Sugawara:** hahahahahaha

**Oikawa:** i don’t want to be here

**Oikawa:** like I really don’t want to be here 

**Oikawa:** I don’t think I’ve ever been this uncomfortable in my life

**Oikawa:** Come on, Iwa-chan lets go

**Oikawa** removed  **Iwaizumi** from the chat

**Oikawa** left the chat

**Sugawara:** HAHAHAHA

**Kenma:** Shouyou why are you asking him that?

**Hinata:** I’m actually curious!

**Hinata:** Like

**Hinata:** He doesn’t really get anything out of it. Do you eat his ass back?

**Kenma:** Sometimes? But we both don’t enjoy it as much?

**Kenma:** Kuro I’m so so uncomfortable 

**Kenma:** Help me

**Kuroo:** I 

**Kuroo:** Hinata I don’t know how to answer you

**Kuroo:** Am I supposed to answer? Like am I supposed to give you the actual reason? What do you want from me

**Akaashi:** This is weird

**Hinata:** Yes! I’m curious!

**Kageyama:** Idiot why are you like this

**Hinata:** Dumbass I’m curious!

**Kenma:** Kuro, don’t answer 

**Kuroo:** You don’t want to know why I like eating your ass? 😼

**Kenma:** I can guess.

**Hinata:** I can’t

**Tsukishima** removed  **Yamaguchi** from the chat

**Tsukishima** left the chat

**Sugawara:** That’s okay. You don’t need to know

**Hinata:** But I’m curious! 

**Kenma:** Shouyou why don’t you try sucking Kageyama’s dick. You’ll get the answer you’re looking for

**Hinata:** Okay!

**Daichi:** Sometimes I don’t like being in this groupchat


	48. stupid just dumb ew ew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: Because my heart WILL break :-)
> 
> Kenma: Oh no oh no I want to cryyyy
> 
> Oikawa: They really said fuck your favorite

_ Tsukki FUCKS _

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki come kiss me because I’m sad 😎😎

**Tsukishima:** Okay

**Tsukishima:** Why are you sad???

**Yamaguchi:** Idk :(

**Tsukishima:** okay, I’ll be there soon

**Sugawara:** Yamaguchi, if you ever need to talk, we’re just a phone call away. You can even visit if you’d like

**Yamaguchi:** Thanks Suga 🥺

-

**Tsukishima:** I have

**Tsukishima:** No words

**Yamaguchi:** Choose your next words wisely

**Tsukishima:** Don’t try to threaten me

**Tsukishima:** It’s not even a big deal lol

**Tsukishima:** it’s just funny

**Oikawa:** Oh god what happened

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi was sad

**Tsukishima:** BECAUSE HE WATCHED AN EDIT

**Tsukishima:** a Harry Potter fancast that was fucking horrible until the last 20 seconds

**Tsukishima:** THE 20 SECONDS WAS SIRIUS BLACK DYING AND REMUS JUST SO SAD

**Yamaguchi:** You always want to break up with me :(

**Tsukishima:** It’s just so funny because the fancast was horrible and you were just sobbing

**Yamaguchi:** It caught me off guard idk idk idk

**Asahi:** Why did you say you didn’t know why you were sad

**Yamaguchi:** BECAUSE I WAS SO SCARED

**Asahi:** wut

**Sugawara:** Do not, DO NOT, remind me that Sirius Black is dead

**Sugawara:** Because my heart WILL break :-)

**Kenma:** Oh no oh no I want to cryyyy

**Oikawa:** They really said fuck your favorite

**Oikawa:** I WILL NOT STAND FOR THAT SHIT

**Akaashi:** Lets talk about the Weasleys 

**Sugawara:** Lets not because I will vomit, shit and cry because of Fred and George

**Oikawa:** AHUT UP LETS NOT TALK ABOUT HARRY POTTER DEATHS BECAUSE I WILL THINK ABOUT SNAPE

**Akaashi:** The resurrection stone :,-) quicker than falling asleep :,-)

**Kenma:** YOURE DEAD TO ME

**Yamaguchi:** WHY WOULD YOU REMIND ME WHY WHY WHY

**Tsukishima:** He’s crying Akaashi

**Akaashi: 😌**

**Tsukishima:** Akaashi, he is CRYING

**Akaashi:** 😌

**Daichi:** Hedwig and dobby

**Daichi:** And Moody 

**Daichi** left the group

**Sugawara:** NO NO DAICHIIII WHY

**Sugawara** added  **Daichi** to the group

**Oikawa:** HEDWIG NOO

**Yamaguchi:** I am hyperventilating GOODBYE

-

**Oikawa:** I have to wake up at 5 ;-)

**Oikawa:** And Iwa-chan refuses to stay up and talk to me because he says I need to sleep

**Daichi:** Because you do need to sleep

**Daichi:** If you sleep right now you can get four hours of sleep

**Oikawa:** But if I wait I can get 3 hours of sleep

**Oikawa:** Maybe even 2 hours 😎 

**Oikawa:** Cool beans

**Sugawara:** Please go to sleep

**Sugawara:** And please don’t say cool beans

**Oikawa:** Fine fine

**Oikawa:** Jk lol

**Sugawara:** Daichi, don’t respond to him because he needs to sleep

**Daichi:** Goodnight Oikawa

**Sugawara:** Goodnight Oikawa

**Oikawa:** **（；＿；）**

**Kageyama:** Aw he looks so sad

**Kageyama:** Goodnight Oikawa

**Oikawa:** TOBIO NO STAY WITH ME

**Hinata:** No

**Hinata:** Goodnight idiot

-

**Kageyama:** Thinking about how short Hinata is

**Hinata:** 😟

**Kageyama:** You’re just so cute

**Hinata:** I’m not so stop

**Kageyama:** You’re cute

**Akaashi:** I don’t mean to interrupt but Kageyama I knitted you a scarf

**Kageyama:** Really? Omg thanks Akaashi

**Akaashi:** Of course!

**Bokuto:** Did you knit me a scarf?

**Akaashi:** No because I’ve knitted you so many things

**Bokuto:** Then why Kageyama?

**Akaashi:** Because he’s 😍

**Hinata:** No

**Bokuto:** NO

**Kuroo:** Kageyama is our king

**Akaashi:** Yes

**Hinata:** yes

**Bokuto:** Yes but no

**Kageyama:** I don’t know what any of this means

**Kuroo:** It means I’m in love with you

**Oikawa:** All of this is scary

**Akaashi:** ANYWAYS

**Akaashi:** I can mail it to you? Or if you’re going to be in the area you can pick it up

**Kageyama:** Shouyou do you wanna go to Tokyo with me

**Hinata:** YES YES YES 😊

**Kageyama:** We can pick it up maybe next weekend

**Kuroo:** YES KAGEYAMA VISIT ME PLEASE PLEASE

**Hinata:** KENMA KENMA I'M COMING TO TOKYO

**Kenma:** I’m excited omg

**Kenma:** WAIT 

**Kenma:** WAIT

**Kenma:** HOLD UP

**Kenma:** KAGEYAMA CALLED HINATA SHOUYOU I AM PEEING

**Kageyama:** Wut

**Kenma:** You called him SHOUYOU

**Kageyama:** I didn’t 

**Kenma:** YOU DID I’VE REREAD IT 30 TIMES BECAUSE I AM PEEING

**Hinata:** EW EW EW WHY WOULD YOU CALL ME THAT

**Kageyama:** We’re dating idiot, why can’t I call you that

**Oikawa:** He wants you to call him baby instead

**Hinata:** Die please

**Kageyama:** Baby

**Hinata:** WHY WOULD YOU EMBARRASS ME OIKAWA THAT WASN’T EVEN WHAT I MEANT AHHH

**Kageyama:** Baby

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA STOP THAT

**Kageyama:** Sorry?

**Hinata:** No I’m just embarrassed

**Asahi:** When their plans to go to Tokyo is in the groupchat ☺️


	49. Head empty thoughts Lev

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: I don’t know lolol
> 
> Kuroo: Yes you do
> 
> Hinata: Yes you do
> 
> Oikawa: Yes you do

_ Tsukki FUCKS _

**Akaashi:** Guess what Kenma just did

**Kenma:** Die.

**Akaashi:** YOU die.

**Kenma:** I hate you and I wish I never met you

**Kuroo:** Omg

**Sugawara:** What did he do?

**Kenma:** We went to go get bagels together right?

**Kenma:** And I get nervous going to new places

**Kuroo:** Which is normal!!!!!!!

**Akaashi:** YES TO AN EXTENT 

**Kenma:** I DIDN’T READ THE MENU ENOUGH

**Akaashi:** YOU DON’T NEED TO READ IT A MILLION TIMES

**Kenma:** I’M NERVOUS

**Kuroo:** WHICH IS NORMAL

**Kenma:** THANK YOU KURO

**Akaashi:** DO YOU WANT TO TELL THEM WHAT YOU DID OR SHOULD I

**Kenma:** WHY ARE YOU ATTACKING ME

**Bokuto:** He hasn’t stopped laughing since he got home

**Kuroo:** Kenma too but he seems so distressed

**Kuroo:** WAIT AHHAHAHA KENMA JUST TOLD ME WHAT HAPPENED

**Kuroo:** HE’S CRYING HAHA

**Oikawa:** I WANT CONTEXT

**Kenma:** I asked Akaashi what he usually gets because he’s been to this palce before

**Kenma:** He told me

**Kenam:** I got to the counter

**Kenma:** GOT NERVOUS

**Kenma:** SO SO SO NERVOUS

**Kenma:** I WANTED TO DIE ON THE SPOT 

**Kenma:** AND I ORDERED A PLAIN BAGEL

**Kenma:** the lady goes “ plain?”

**Akaashi:** and he goes “yes” and he’s all STUTTERING AND NERVOUS AND I CAN TELL HE WANTS TO DIE

**Kenma:** AND SHE GLARED AT ME?

**Kenma:** I’M SORRY I’M NERVOUS

**Oikawa:** KENMA YOU’RE SO USELESS

**Kenma:** SHUT UP

**Oikawa:** YOU CAN’T EVEN ORDER A BAGEL

**Kenma:** I PANICKED OKAY

**Sugawara:** Kenma how does this stuff happen to you

**Kenma:** It’s because the universe has a vendetta against me for being too awesome 

**Sugawara:** Sure

-

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi, would you like to explain to everyone what you’re doing right now?

**Yamaguchi:** Idk what you’re talking about Tsukki!

**Sugawara:** Oh god

**Hinata:** Oh no

**Tsukishima:** It’s okay.

**Tsukishima:** Just explain it like you explained it to me

**Yamaguchi:** You called me an idiot!

**Tsukishima:** Because you are!

**Yamaguchi:** Whatever

**Yamaguchi:** i bought a body pillow

**Yamaguchi:** Because I’ve been missing my Tsukki cuddles 

**Tsukishima:** Ew don’t say that

**Yamaguchi:** It’s true!

**Yamaguchi:** Anyway. It’s really fluffy

**Yamaguchi:** Like it’s the kind of fluffy pillow that you see in the store and run your hand along because it’s so so soft

**Yamaguchi:** And I bought it and washed it because duh

**Yamaguchi:** And then without thinking about it put it in the dryer

**Sugawara:** Oh no lol

**Yamaguchi:** AND NOW IT’S NOT FLUFFY IT JUST FEELS HORRIBLE

**Oikawa:** We’ve all been there

**Iwaizumi:** No we haven’t 

**Iwaizumi:** You have because you’re an idiot

**Oikawa:** Mean!

**Yamaguchi:** And that’s it! The pillow is ruined

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi

**Yamaguchi:** Fine!

**Yamaguchi:** And now i’m brushing it because I refuse to give up

**Hinata:** You’re brushing it?

**Yamaguchi:** With a comb

**Yamaguchi:** My arm is so tired

**Yamaguchi:** And I’m only done with a small corner

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki will you come over and help? 

**Tsukishima:** No.

**Yamaguchi:** Why are you breaking up with me in the groupchat?

**Sugawara:** Tsukishima, wtf. Don’t bring a break-up into a groupchat

**Oikawa:** Omg! I can’t believe I just watched Yamaguchi get his heart broken!

**Hinata:** Yamaguchi! Are you alright? I can’t believe this is happening to you..

**Tsukishima:** All of you are annoying

**Oikawa:** Where’s Kuroo, he’s being oddly silent

**Kuroo:** Sorry, I was sucking dick

**Kuroo:** Let me read the chat

**Oikawa:** You don’t have to tell us why you weren’t active but ok

**Kuroo:** Yamaguchi don’t use a comb, just use a brush. It won’t be as fluffy but it’ll still be really soft

**Kuroo:** And it takes a lot less time

**Yamaguchi:** Thank you Kuroo!

**Yamaguchi:** Kuroo be my new boyfriend!

**Tsukishima:** No. Stop.

**Kuroo:** I’d love to Yamaguchi 🥰 Come to Tokyo, I’ll treat you right

**Kenma:** Stop it

-

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI BOUGHT ME A NEW PILLOW

**Yamaguchi:** _ attached image _

**Yamaguchi:** And then he fell asleep on it so basically it’s my new favorite pillow because he bought it and it’s green and it’s his favorite color and now it’s going to smell like him 

**Yamaguchi:** I’m living in paradise

**Tsukishima:** When did you take that

**Kageyama:** He took it when you were sleeping. Did you even look at the picture

**Tsukishima:** Butt-out, asshole

**Kageyama:** Just pointing out the obvious, four-eyes.

**Daichi:** Stop it, you two 

**Sugawara:** Anyway! That’s so cute!

**Sugawara:** Yamaguchi, you’re so cute!

**Kuroo:** Noooo Tsukishima stop being such a good boyfriend! He’s dating me!

**Tsukishima:** Go away Kuroo

**Kenma:** Go away Kuro

**Kuroo:** WELL IF THAT’S HOW YOU ALL FEEL

**Kenma:** It is

**Kuroo:** Kenma, why are you breaking up with me in the groupchat?

**Oikawa:** Shut up

**Hinata:** Shut up

**Sugawara:** Shut up

**Kuroo:** WHY DOES IT WORK FOR YAMAGUCHI BUT NOT ME

**Yamaguchi:** Because I’m cute

**Kuroo:** I’M CUTE

**Kuroo:** WTF

**Kuroo:** SOMEONE ANSWER

**Kuroo:** I’M CUTE

**Kuroo:** KENMA TELL ME I’M CUTE

**Kuroo:** GUYS

-

**Kenma:** Kuro! I named my starter after you!

**Kuroo:** AWWW AGAIN?

**Kenma:** Yes!

**Hinata:** You’re still doing that?

**Kenma:** Yes!

**Oikawa:** Starter?

**Kenma:** Pokemon, dumbass.

**Oikawa:** HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT WHEN YOU GAVE NO CONTEXT

**Sugawara:** Wow Oikawa, you really surprise me sometimes!

**Oikawa:** What does that mean?

**Sugawara:** Everyone knows Pokemon terminology. You’re a bigger idiot than I thought!!

**Oikawa:** WHY ARE YOU BULLYING ME

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN

**Iwaizumi:** Omg lol guys leave Oikawa alone

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan 💖💓

**Kuroo:** Iwaizumi omg you’re standing up for him

**Kuroo:** Ur gonna make me act up 😳😳

**Asahi:** I’m going to ignore whatever that was and ask the obvious

**Asahi:** Hinata what do you mean?

**Hinata:** Kenma always names his starter Pokemon after Kuroo

**Daichi:** Why?

**Kenma:** I don’t know lolol

**Kuroo:** Yes you do

**Hinata:** Yes you do

**Oikawa:** Yes you do

**Daichi:** ???

**Kenma:** IT’S EMBARRASSING 

**Tsukishima:** If you didn’t want anyone to ask then why did you bring it up in the chat?

**Kenma:** I THOUGHT THEY WOULD TAKE IDK AS AN ANSWER

**Akaashi:** It’s because the starters are with you from the beginning, and Kuroo’s been there since the beginning

**Kenma:** WHEN TF DID I TELL YOU THAT

**Akaashi:** When we got high last weekend

**Kenma:** O yeah

**Kuroo:** YES YES YES 

**Kuroo:** THAT’S SO CUTE KENMA I WANT TO SLIP AND FALL ON MY FACE AND DIE

**Kenma:** YOU ALREADY KNEW WHY I DID THAT

**Kuroo:** BUT IT’S STILL SO CUTE

**Kenma:** IT’S EMBARRASSING 

**Sugawara:** It is embarrassing 

**Kenma:** Shut UP

**Sugawara:** But it’s cute!

**Hinata:** Yeah!

**Oikawa:** No it’s not. I’m gagging

**Kuroo:** I’LL KILL YOU


	50. I DID IT LIKE I SAID I WAS GOING TO AHAH ANYWAYS THE REYNOLDS PAMPHLET. HAVE YOU READ THIS?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: When he’s showing emotion what
> 
> Oikawa: Why is Tobio suddenly so vulnerable 

**_ Tsukki FUCKS _ **

**Daichi:** I want kids

**Daichi:** Suga is so good with kids

**Sugawara:** Daichi make me pregnant

**Daichi:** Suga your niece is NAPPING ON THE COUCH

**Sugawara:** Daichi make me pregnant when we get home

**Sugawara:** 😚

**Daichi: 😚**

**Oikawa:** I don’t like that

**Oikawa:** How did Daichi end up with such a pervert

**Daichi:** He’s not a pervert

**Daichi:** He’s perfect

**Tsukishima:** Yuck

**Sugawara:** Daichi 😍😍

**Kuroo:** Anyways

**Kuroo:** What made you want kids suddenly

**Daichi:** Well not right now! But eventually

**Daichi:** Me and Suga are watching his niece and she’s so cute

**Daichi:** Suga’s just so good with kids and like

**Daichi:** He’d look perfect with a little baby

**Sugawara:** No no no

**Sugawara:** We’d look perfect with a little baby

**Sugawara:** SHUT UP ME AND DAICHI AS PARENTS OMG

**Sugawara:** Daichi Daichi Daichi

**Sugawara:** We’d be the best parents ever

**Sugawara:** OMGOMG

**Asahi:** Lmaooo calm down

**Sugawara:** I just want to marry Daichi

**Sugawara:** I’m so in love with him and like

**Sugawara:** uGHHH IM SO IN LOVE WITH DAICHI LIKE I CANT EXPLAIN HOW I FEEL

**Daichi:** Stop lol

**Sugawara:** I CANNOT IM JUST SO IN LOVE WITH MY DAICHI I WANT TO CRY

**Daichi:** No no no no no don’t cry please

**Sugawara:** You just don’t know how it feels to be in love with you

**Kuroo:** I do lol

**Kenma:** Please don’t ruin their cute moment

**Sugawara:** I’m gonna ignore that

**Kuroo:** Sorry lol I had to

**Sugawara:** Anyways

**Sugawara:** Daichi, you’re like the best man I know and just ugh one day I wanna get married and start a family and just be in love forever

**Daichi:** Stop stop stop I’m so embarrassed this is the groupchat suga

**Sugawara:** It’s fine it’s fine

**Daichi:** We’ll get married one day, I know it!

**Kageyama:** I kinda want to cry

**Sugawara:** oh? What’s wrong?

**Kageyama:** I just

**Kageyama:** You guys are so in love

**Kageyama:** Like I knew that but you’re just so in love and it’s so cute

**Daichi:** Aw Kageyama

**Oikawa:** When he’s showing emotion what

**Oikawa:** Why is Tobio suddenly so vulnerable 

**Sugawara:** Thinking about how he could’ve been your son if you didn’t try to hit him

**Oikawa:** Stop that

**Iwaizumi:** Nice going idiot

**Oikawa:** STOP THAT ITS FINE SHOUYOU IS OUR SON

**Oikawa:** Speaking of Shouyou, where is he?

**Kageyama:** He hasn’t woken up from his nap

**Kageyama:** _ attached image _

**Kenma:** CUTE CUTE 

**Kageyama:** Yes :-)

**Asahi:** This entire conversation started with Suga being horny?

**Nishinoya:** AS HE SHOULD BE

**Asahi:** You scare me

**Nishinoya:** STOP THAT

-

**Akaashi:** The weather is horrible today

**Akaashi:** I’m so cold

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI I CAN BRING MY BLANKET OVER

**Akaashi:** Okay 🥰

**Bokuto:** YAY OKAY IM ON MY WAY

**Kenma:** why his blancket

**Oikawa:** blancket what the fuck

**Akaashi:** He has a weighted one

**Kenna:** He’s gonna walk to your place with a weighted blanket??

**Akaashi:** Yes because he loves me

**Bokuto:** YES BECAUSE I LOVE HIM

**Akaashi:** I have oranges Bokuto

**Bokuto:** YES OKAY IM ALMOST THERE

**Akaashi:** the door is unlocked 

**Bokuto:** :-)

**Hinata:** it’s SNOWING KAGEYAMA PLEASE COME OVER SO WE CAN PLAY

**Kageyama:** No

**Hinata:** BUT YAMAGUCHI IS HERE

**Kageyama:** maybe later

**Hinata:** SO YOU’LL COME OVER FOR YAMAGUCHI BUT NOT ME

**Kageyama:** No idiot, I just don’t want to go right now

**Hinata:** OKAY TEXT ME WHEN YOURE ON YOUR WAY

**Hinata:** I’ll make cookies for you!!

**Kageyama:** DO NOT TOUCH THE OVEN

**Yamaguchi:** I’ll help him!

**Kageyama:** okay good 

**Kageyama:** Thanks

**Kenma:** Why can’t he use the oven

**Kageyama:** He sets the smoke alarm off so much

**Hinata:** IT WAS ONLY LIKE 4 TIMES

**Kageyama:** IN ONE WEEK

**Oikawa:** 4 TIMES ARE YOU SERIOUS SHOUYOU IDIOT

**Hinata:** LEAVE ME ALONE

-

**Kenma:** Someone write a fanfic about me and Kuro

**Kuroo:** YES

**Akaashi:** No

**Kenma:** PLEASE ITD BE SO FUN I PROMISE

**Oikawa:** Then you write it

**Kenma:** Don’t tell me what to do

**Hinata:** Why do you want that

**Kenma:** Because think about it

**Kenma:** THATS FUNNY

**Hinata:** I guess

**Kenma:** it’s the least you can do after I wrote the one about you and KAGEYAMA

**Hinata:** SHUT UP I FORGOT ABOUT THAT THAT IS SO EMBARRASSING 

**Hinata:** AND I DIDNT ASK FOR ONE, YOU JUST WROTE IT 

**Kageyama:** wut

**Hinata:** NOTHINGS

**Kenma:** PLEASE

**Hinata:** FINE GOD OKAY ILL THINK OF AN AU

**Akaashi:** is no one going to talk about Kenma’s random liking for fanfiction

**Akaashi:** Like he has talked about fanfics twice now? Maybe more

**Kenma:** And what about it?

**Akaashi:** You’re a weirdo


	51. This but you and 🤮👎🏼 are talking HAHAHAHA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: AM I NOT A BOY TOO
> 
> Iwaizumi: No. You’re an idiot

**Kenma** changed the group name to  _ Kuro is OVER PARTY I HATE HIM I HATE HIM _

**Kuroo:** Kenma

**Kuroo:** Kenmaaaa

**Kuroo:** Babyyyyyy

**Kuroo:** Kittennnnn

**Kuroo:** Baaaaaabeeeeeee

**Kuroo:** Honeyyyyyy

**Kenma:** Don’t call me honey

**Kenma:** I’m mad at you don’t even talk to me

**Akaashi:** what is happening

**Oikawa:** HONEY AHAHA

**Kuroo:** Kenma is ignoring me

**Kenma:** HE THREW MY WATER BOTTLES AWAY

**Oikawa:** We all know your water bottles are a problem

**Kenma:** THEY ARE NOT A PROBLEM

**Kuroo:** THEY WERE ALL EMPTY

**Kuroo:** EVERYTIME I WOULD MOVE ON YOUR BED YOU COULD HEAR THE CRACKLE OF A MILLION WATER BOTTLES

**Kenma:** THERE WERE NOT A MILLION

**Kuroo:** YEAH OKAY THERE WEREN’T

**Kuroo:** I COUNTED THEM, THERE WERE 84

**Oikawa:** KENMA 

**Akaashi:** Thank god Kuroo cleaned them out

**Kenma:** I wanted to clean them MYSELF BECAUSE THEY’RE EMBARRASSING

**Kuroo:** Out of everything, why would water bottles be embarrassing

**Kenma:** BECAUSE THEY ARE

**Kuroo:** IDIOT YOU’VE LITERALLY SAT ON MY FACE BUT YOU’RE EMBARRASSED ABOUT EMPTY WATER BOTTLES 

**Kenma:** YES IDIOT

**Kuroo:** YOU’RE AN IDIOT

**Kuroo:** IF YOU CLEAN THEM UP THEN YOU WON’T GET EMBARRASSED

**Kenma:** STOP

**Iwaizumi:** What a dumb argument

**Kenma:** iTS NOT DUMB

**Oikawa:** It is

**Akaashi:** It is

**Hinata:** it is

**Tanaka:** It literally is so dumb

**Nishinoya:** RYUUUUU

**Tanaka:** YUUUUU

**Nishinoya:** 😍

**Tanaka:** 😍

**Kuroo:** I’m right Kenma so come over here, forgive me, and kiss me 

**Kenma:** fine.

**Iwaizumi:** Can we go back to the fact that Kuroo called Kenma honey

**Kuroo:** i knew it would get his attention 😎

**Kenma:** It scares me

**Akaashi:** If anyone EVER called me honey 🤢

**Nishinoya:** OMG DO YOU THINK KAGEYAMA AND HINATA HAVE LIKE PET NAMES 

**Hinata:** No

**Kageyama:** Yes

**Hinata:** NO

**Kageyama:** What?

**Kenma:** Why must you always lie Shouyou

**Nishinoya:** OMG WHAT DO YOU CALL EACH OTHER

**Kageyama:** It’s nothing creative

**Kageyama:** i just call him baby sometimes

**Oikawa:** Nothing to switch things up a bit?

**Oikawa:** Sunshine?

**Kenma:** Bright ass orange head bitch?

**Hinata:** HEY

**Oikawa:** Tangerine fuck?

**Hinata:** Why does this HAPPEN TO ME? I'M A GOOD PERSON

**Oikawa:** Overexcited bright hair stupid idiot?

**Hinata:** I HATE YOU BOTH DIE

**Kageyama:** Nope, just Hinata or baby.

**Kageyama:** Or Shouyou

**Akaashi:** I can’t even imagine Kageyama saying baby

**Hinata:** It’s very 🤤

**Kageyama:** You’re embarrassing 

**Daichi:** Baby is cute

**Daichi:** I call Suga that

**Sugawara:** Daichi also calls me beautiful, gorgeous, angel

**Daichi:** They don’t need to know that

**Sugawara:** And I call him daddy but that’s not really a pet name lol

**Nishinoya:** YES AHAH SUGA

**Oikawa:** HAHAHA

**Daichi:** Why do you always do things like this?

**Sugawara:** 😇

**-**

**Oikawa:** I want a kid

**Iwaizumi:** I told you not yet

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan pleeeeaaaaseeeee

**Sugawara:** What inspired this?

**Oikawa:** I saw the CUTEST little boy on TikTok. Like his mom makes tiktoks of him and he is so precious

**Oikawa:** MY SEROTONIN IS THROUGH THE ROOF AND ME AND IWA-CHAN JUST CUDDLED AND WATCHED THEIR TIKTOKS ALL DAY

**Iwaizumi:** He started crying like halfway through

**Oikawa:** BECAUSE THEY’RE SUCH A CUTE FAMILY LIKE WTF

**Oikawa:** He always says thank you mama like I WANT ONE

**Iwaizumi:** You do not need a child

**Oikawa:** i DONT NEED A KID I DONT NEED A KID I CANT TAKE CARE OF MYSELF I DONT NEED A KID

**Iwaizumi:** Yes

**Oikawa:** BUT I WANT ONE SO BAD

**Oikawa:** I WANT A CUTE KID THATS JUST SO POLITE AND SWEET AND CUTE

**Iwaizumi:** How about after college? Once we finally settle down somewhere we can look into adoption

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan 🥺

**Akaashi:** Aww that's cute 

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI DO YOU WANT KIDS

**Akaashi:** I’d love to have kids one day

**Bokuto:** YOU’D BE SUCH A GOOD PARENT AKAASHI OMGOMG

**Akaashi:** You’re gonna be a great parent too 🥰

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI 🥰 I WANT TO KISS YOU

**Akaashi:** lol you can come over after work

**Akaashi:** Sleep over

**Bokuto:** We can walk to class together tomorrow!!!!!

**Yamaguchi:** Kids scare me teehee

**Tsukishima:** lol ❤️

**Yamaguchi:** ❤️

**Iwaizumi:** lol why?

**Yamaguchi:** Idk they make me uncomfy and like

**Yamaguchi:** What do I even say to a kid? We have nothing in common

**Yamaguchi:** And like, idk how to carry a baby

**Yamaguchi:** And they’re so gross sometimes. I’d have to teach them to not be gross

**Sugawara:** It’ll come naturally, I guess

**Yamaguchi:** to you maybe because you are a mom

**Sugawara:** Aw thank you!

**Daichi:** LMAO

**Kenma:** I think Kuro’s influence is too strong and our kid would be embarrassing 

**Kuroo:** I agree

**Kuroo:** We wouldn’t want our kid to be a total fucking hot piece of ass with great legs and great abs and just the best personality and literally a genius

**Kenma:** No, we wouldn’t want our kid to be a weirdo that pisses me off

**Yamaguchi:** Wow goals

-

**Daichi:** Iwaizumi, are you still coming over?

**Iwaizumi:** Oh shit, I forgot to text you lmao

**Iwaizumi:** I’m on my way!

**Oikawa:** What?! 

**Oikawa:** Where are you going???

**Oikawa:** I wanna come too!!!

**Iwaizumi:** Boys day

**Kuroo:** ME TOO

**Bokuto:** HEY ME TOO

**Daichi:** You guys live far away, lol. I told you already that we’ll visit you soon

**Oikawa:** AM I NOT A BOY TOO

**Iwaizumi:** No. You’re an idiot

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN WHY DO YOU HATE ME WHEN ALL I DO IS LOVE YOU

**Oikawa:** Is Suga gonna be there?

**Daichi:** 🙃

**Akaashi:** Oh my

**Akaashi:** What does that mean

**Iwaizumi:** No, he’s not gonna be there

**Oikawa:** Where is he???

**Daichi:** He has some school work to do 🙃

**Kuroo:** LMAOOOO DAICHI

**Oikawa:** I FEEL LIKE I’M BEING EXCLUDED AND IT FEELS LONELYYY

**Akaashi:** it kind of does lol

**Kuroo:** Daichi is jealous 😎

**Oikawa:** omg why why why

**Daichi:** Nothing, just

**Daichi:** Suga has a group project that he’s doing

**Daichi:** And one of the group members likes him

**Daichi:** Like, Suga and I were drinking and we invited some friends over

**Daichi:** And this guy kept like, touching Suga and flirting with him

**Daichi:** I WAS SITTING RIGHT THERE WHO JUST DOES THAT

**Daichi:** MY ARM WAS AROUND HIS WAIST AND SUGA WAS LIKE LEANING ON ME AND THIS GUY KEPT LIKE FLIRTING AND LEANING CLOSER

**Daichi:** AND SUGA WOULD JUST FUCKING GIGGLE INTO MY NECK BECAUSE HE WAS DRUNK AS FUCK

**Daichi:** LIKE STAY AWAY FROM MY BOYFRIEND PLEASE

**Daichi:** Idk idk idk idk it’s whatever

**Daichi:** Like Suga is totally fine but the guy just pisses me off

**Iwaizumi:** Therefore, boys day to get his mind off of things :-)

**Oikawa:** I see I see

**Nishinoya:** Jealous Daichi 🥵

**Tanaka:** Jealous Daichi 🤤

**Kuroo:** Jealous Daichi 😳

**Bokuto:** The jealous angry combo 🥵😤

**Iwaizumi:** I’m almost there btw

**Oikawa:** Jealous Daichi jealous Daichi jealous Daichi

**Bokuto** changed the group name to  _ Daichi bout to make me act up😳🥴 _

**-**

**Sugawara and Daichi**

**Sugawara:** I’m back!

**Sugawara:** And my project is finished!

**Daichi:** I’m sure you’ll get a good grade

**Sugawara:** Thanks lol 💗

**Sugawara:** How was “boys day”

**Daichi:** haha good. Me and Iwaizumi just went out to eat and then had a few drinks.

**Daichi:** Nothing too crazy. He just left a little bit ago

**Sugawara:** Sooo

**Sugawara:** You’re free now?

**Daichi:** Yup

**Sugawara:** Do you wannaaaaaa

**Sugawara:** Get high and makeout?

**Sugawara:** And then fuck?

**Daichi:** Lmaooooo you’re insane

**Daichi:** omw

**Sugawara:** 😚

**Daichi:** 😚


	52. this but it's me singing that would be enough and then sending it to 🤬😱😪 like an idiot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: Don’t lecture me, Daddy
> 
> Sugawara: I’ll kill you
> 
> Oikawa: haha ANYWAY

_ Daichi bout to make me act up😳🥴 _

**Kenma:** GUYS

**Kenma:** I FIGURED IT OUT

**Oikawa:** What

**Kuroo:** What

**Nishinoya:** What

**Kenma:** I KNOW WHY PHILIP IN HAMILTON MAKES ME CRY

**Oikawa:** Omg lol

**Oikawa:** Why?

**Kenma:** He reminds me of Shouyou!

**Hinata:** What

**Hinata:** HOW

**Sugawara:** HAHAHA H O W 

**Kenma:** Hear me out!

**Kenma:** Philip is embarrassing 

**Kenma:** Shouyou is embarrassing

**Hinata:** Jerk!

**Kenma:** Philip is weirdly pure and innocent

**Kenma:** Shouyou is weirdly pure and innocent

**Kenma:** And he’s just trying his best???

**Hinata:** You’re insane

**Oikawa:** No, I can see it. I can see it

**Kenma:** YES

**Kenma:** AND HE MAKES ME CRY

**Oikawa:** LMAO KENMA SHUT UP WE KNOW

**Kenma:** Shouyou please don’t ever die

**Hinata:** What

**Kenma:** PLEASE DON’T DIE BEFORE ME

**Kenma:** I DON’T THINK I’LL BE AB;E TO HANDLE IT

**Kuroo:** kenma why ARE YOU CRYING

**Kenma:** I CAN’T STOP

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU DON’T DIE BEFORE ME

**Sugawara:** KENMA HAHA WHAT IS THIS

**Hinata:** I CAN’T CONTROL WHEN I DIE

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU 

**Kuroo:** HINATA DO SOMETHING HE WON’T STOP 

**Hinata:** KENMA YOU’RE BEING SO WEIRD

**Kenma:** I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

**Hinata:** STOP

**Oikawa:** I CAN’T BREATHE HAHA

**Kuroo:** HINATA PLEASE

**Hinata:** AHHHH

**Kenma:** DON’T DIE BEFORE ME

**Kenma:** I’LL HAVE TO MOVE UPTOWN AND CRY EVERYDAY

**Sugawara:** HAHAHAH

**Hinata:** KENMA PLEASE

-

**Hinata and Kenma**

**Hinata:** STOP CRYING IN THE GROUPCHAT

**Kenma:** I LOVE YOU

**Kenma:** I MISS YOU SO MUCH

**Kenma:** YOU’RE ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS

**Hinata:** STOP

**Kenma:** I CAN’T

_ Incoming call from:  _ **_Ew Shouyou_ **

**-**

**Akaashi** changed the group name to  _ I’m stupid and not suited for life _

**Oikawa:** What

**Bokuto:** THAT’S NOT TRUE

**Kenma:** What

**Akaashi:** I’m having a bit of a breakdown

**Bokuto:** DO I NEED TO COME OVER?

**Akaashi:** If you want to

**Bokuto:** OMW OMW OMW OMW

**Sugawara:** Why are you having a breakdown?

**Akaashi:** Okay so like

**Akaashi:** First year of university my major was biology because I convinced myself I wanted to be a doctor because my family wanted me to be one

**Akaashi:** I was so bad at like all of the classes and just SUFFERING

**Akaashi:** AND I HATED IT

**Akaashi:** So then I changed my major to education

**Akaashi:** BUT I FEEL LIKE I’M WASTING TIME

**Bokuto:** YOU’RE NOT AKAASHI

**Bokuto:** YOU LOVE WHAT YOU’RE DOING

**Akaashi:** Yes but what if I love something else more???

**Akaashi:** And now for some reason I want to change it to architecture?? 

**Akaashi:** It’s so late in my school career I can’t change my major now

**Kenma:** You only have one semester’s worth of credits for education. It’s not too late

**Akaashi:** STILL

**Oikawa:** I vote that you don’t change it!

**Nishinoya:** I think you should! If you think you’ll be happier, then why not? Take classes for it for a semester and if you don’t like it then there’s no harm! You can just change it back and pick up where you left off! There’s no time limit on figuring out what you want to do. As long as you’re learning and happy, then you’re not wasting any time! There’s no deadline for this kinda stuff

**Oikawa:** Noya! That was surprisingly wise!

**Nishinoya:** Thank you!

**Tanaka:** YUU!

**Nishinoya:** RYU!

**Hinata:** If you’re happy with what you’re doing now then why do you want to change it?

**Akaashi:** I feel like I’m settling!!

**Sugawara:** Then change it! You’d be such a cute architect!

**Bokuto:** AWWW A CUTE ARCHITECT BF?

**Bokuto:** CUTE

**Akaashi:** Shut up, Bokuto

**Akaashi:** Ok ok. I think I’m going to. Just like what Nishinoya said. It’s fine

**Nishinoya:** YESS

**Akaashi:** Actually, no, wait. I have to think about it

**Oikawa:** Smart!

**Akaashi:** AHHHHH

**Bokuto:** Akaashi I’m here!

**Akaashi:** The door is unlocked

**Bokuto:** Guess who’s going to get a MILLION KISSES 

**Nishinoya:** YESSSSSS

**Bokuto:** I LOVE YOU AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** Come in and say it to my face!

**Bokuto:** OKAY

**Kenma:** Bokuto and Akaashi I’m obsessed with you guys. Ur so cute i can’t breathe

**Kuroo:** ME TOO ME TOO 

**Oikawa:** Um ?

**Kenma:** Yes?

**Oikawa:** Me and Iwa-chan are cuter

**Kenma:** No you’re not but nice try, idiot. ❤️

**Oikawa:** So you hate me

**Kenma:** Yes

**Oikawa:** WTF

-

**Oikawa:** UM?

**Sugawara:** Yes?

**Oikawa:** U M?

**Sugawara:** YES?

**Oikawa:** UUUMMM???

**Kenma:** Spit it OUT TOORU

**Oikawa:** I JUST 

**Oikawa:** I’M JUST

**Nishinoya:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** I just found out from Kuroo 

**Oikawa:** THAT 

**Oikawa:** FUCKING TERUSHIMA 

**Oikawa:** TOLD HIM THAT WE’RE “””””””TALKING””””””?

**Oikawa:** BITCH I HAVE A BOYFRIEND

**Iwaizumi:** What?

**Iwaizumi:** What did he say?

**Oikawa:** So he’s been texting me so much recently

**Oikawa:** And like calling me baby and stuff

**Iwaizumi:** What?

**Iwaizumi:** I didn’t know that. You didn’t tell me that.

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan I knew you’d get mad and it’s not a big deal so don’t stress

**Oikawa:** I don’t even answer him

**Iwaizumi:** Give me his number

**Oikawa:** No Iwa-chan!! You’ll scare him!

**Iwaizumi:** Good

**Oikawa:** No!

**Oikawa:** Anyway. I started to feel bad, because he told Kuroo that I was so mean to him and always ignored him

**Kuroo:** I shouldn’t have told you that

**Iwaizumi:** Kuroo do you have his number?

**Kuroo:** I do not

**Kuroo:** I have a class with him, and he saw me facetiming Oikawa in class once so now he talks about him all the time

**Kenma:** You two facetime?

**Daichi:** IN CLASS?

**Kuroo:** Yes

**Oikawa:** Yes

**Daichi:** Don’t do that in class

**Kuroo:** Don’t lecture me, Daddy

**Sugawara:** I’ll kill you

**Oikawa:** haha ANYWAY

**Oikawa:** I FELT SO BAD

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t. I’ll kill him

**Oikawa:** SO I STARTED ANSWERING BUT WITH REALLY SHORT ANSWERS LIKE ‘Cool.’ or ‘Ok.’ AND THAT’S IT

**Oikawa:** I DON’T MAKE CONVERSATION AND I LET TOPICS DIE SO QUICKLY AND I STILL LEAVE HIM ON READ ALL THE TIME

**Oikawa:** AND THIS IDIOT WAS TALKING TO KUROO

**Oikawa:** AND STARTED BRAGGING BECAUSE APPARENTLY NOW WE’RE TALKING

**Oikawa:** AND NOW HE SENDS ME GOODNIGHT TEXTS ALL THE TIME

**Oikawa:** LIKE

**Oikawa:** goodnight cutie ❤️

**Oikawa:** I’M SICK!!!!

**Iwaizumi:** Give me his number

**Oikawa:** No!

**Iwaizumi:** Give me your phone

**Oikawa:** No!

**Kuroo:** He wants to ask you out again

**Oikawa:** UGH

**Iwaizumi:** Give me your phone

**Oikawa:** What are you going to say?

**Iwaizumi:** Just that u can’t go out with him

**Oikawa:** Oh okay

**Iwaizumi:** Because you’re too busy getting fucked by your boyfriend

**Iwaizumi:** And sucking his dick because you love him

**Kuroo:** I CAN’T BREATHE

**Kenma:** HAHAHA

**Sugawara:** IWAIZUMI DON’T BE SO 

**Sugawara:** SO ??!??!?!

**Sugawara:** SO JEALOUS

**Kuroo:** Coming from you

**Sugawara:** SHUT UP

**Iwaizumi:** I’m doing it

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN I’M EMBARRASSED!

**Iwaizumi:** I’m doing it

**Akaashi:** Why not just block him?

**Akaashi:** Crazy, I know

**Oikawa:** I FEEL BAD

**Iwaizumi:** I’m gonna kill him

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN STOP

**Sugawara:** I think jealous Iwaizumi is my favorite.


	53. just me making Suga horny so I can feel some sort of serotonin spike idk idk idk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: Suga is awfully needy today
> 
> Sugawara: it’s because I look ugly so I need reassurance from Daichi 
> 
> Sugawara: I’m toxic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I better not see ANY Hoshiumi slander here because apparently people hate him. Idk why, he's just Hinata in a fancy font. Love him

_ I’m stupid and not suited for life _

**Hinata:** _ Attached image _

**Hinata:** He’s making me breakfast

**Akaashi:** It’s almost 2

**Kenma:** HES MAKING HIM BREAKFAST

**Kenma:** Kuro I want breakfast

**Kuroo:** We had breakfast like 5 hours ago

**Kuroo:** When it was time for breakfast

**Kuroo:** I’ll make you dinner though

**Kenma:** 💗💗

**Akaashi:** Why are you two up so late anyways

**Hinata:** We were tired

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Kageyama fucks???  _

**Hinata:** No no no 

**Hinata:** We went to the gym super super late lol

**Hinata:** And we were super restless when we got back to his place so we stayed up and played video games

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ I’m disappointed :-( _

**Kuroo:** I’m also disappointed

**Kuroo:** Why didn’t he fuck

**Hinata:** Because we didn’t feel like it???

**Oikawa:** Lame answer

**Hinata:** WHY

**Kenma:** WHY DIDNT HE FUCK

**Hinata:** STOP STOP STOP IDK IDK IDK

**Sugawara:** Guys stop

**Sugawara:** Leave them alone

**Hinata:** Thank you

**Sugawara:** They can just be boring as fuck and keep their sex life to themselves 

**Tsukishima:** LMAO

**Asahi:** For once I’m not the shyest person in the chat

**Yamaguchi:** kinda weird that it’s Hinata now lol

**Tanaka:** HAHAH WTF HINATA WHY ARE YOU SO SHY WHEN IT COMES TO KAGEYAMA

**Hinata:** FINE FINE FINE

**Hinata:** WE WERE GOING TO BUT 

**Hinata:** I FELL ASLEEP

**Nishinoya:** What

**Nishinoya:** WHAT

**Nishinoya:** WHAT AHAH

**Nishinoya:** YOU FELL ASLEEP WHEN YOU GUYS WERE GONNA FUCK AHAH

**Tanaka:** HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN AHAHAH

**Hinata:** I DONT KNOW WE GOT HOME FROM THE GYM AND LIKE SHOWERED AND PLAYED SOME VIDEO GAMES AND LIKE THINGS STARTED HAPPENING

**Hinata:** AND LIKE IT WAS SO LATE AND WE SPENT HOURS WORKING OUT

**Hinata:** I TOOK A WARM BATH

**Hinata:** I WAS WEARING HIS SHIRT

**Hinata:** IDK I WAS SO COMFY I JUST FELL ASLEEP WHILE HE WAS KISSING ME

**Hinata:** IDK IDK KAGEYAMA IS JUST SO 

**Hinata:** HES SO

**Hinata:** GWAHH AND WARM AND HES JUST SO KAGEYAMA

**Hinata:** I FELL ASLEEP BECAUSE HES SO GENTLE IDK IDK IDK

**Hinata:** IF YOUVE EVER KISSED HIM YOU WOULD KNOW

**Oikawa:** Maybe Iwa-Chan knows

**Iwaizumi:** Do not make this about us

**Hinata:** Don’t remind me about that

**Tsukishima:** That’s actually

**Tsukishima:** So stupid Hinata

**Tsukishima:** You are so dumb

**Hinata:** STOP IT WASN’T IN MY CONTROL

**Hinata:** I was so embarrassed when we woke up so he made me breakfast

**Kenma:** You should be making him breakfast

**Kenma:** He’s probably so embarrassed 

**Kenma:** HE HAD TO FIND OUT THAT YOU WERE ASLEEP IDIOT

**Hinata:** STOP DONT TELL ME THAT THATS SO EMBARRASSING 

**Bokuto:** HAHAHAHAH I CANT BREATHE THIS IS SO DUMB

**Hinata:** I CANT COOK WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO

**Nishinoya:** Suck his dick!

**Okinawa:** Suck his dick!

**Sugawara:** Suck his dick!

**Kenna:** SUCK HIS DICK!!

**Hinata:** AHHH

**Kageyama** left the group

**Tsukishima:** LMAO

**Akaashi:** lol

**Kuroo:** MY MAN NOOOO COME BACK

**Kuroo** _ added  _ **Kageyama** to the group

**Bokuto:** Welcome back!!!!! :-)

**Kageyama** left the group

**Bokuto:** :-(

**Akaashi** added  **Kageyama** to the group

**Sugawara:** Stop leaving

**Kageyama:** This is embarrassing 

**Kageyama:** You guys make Shouyou so weird

**Sugawara:** We simply encourage him because if we don’t he won’t do ANYTHING

**Hinata:** HEY

**Oikawa:** Shouyou, you would’ve still thought you were straight if it weren’t for us

**Tanaka:** That still makes me laugh

**Hinata:** stop that ☹️

**Kageyama:** Whatever

**Kageyama:** Your food is ready idiot

**Kageyama:** I have to clean soon too

**Hinata:** your place is literally so clean wut

**Hinata:** ew ew ew ew nevermind ew don’t talk to me

**Sugawara:** Wut

**Hinata:** Hoshiumi is coming over🤢🤢

**Kageyama:** Stop that

**Hinata:** He always wants to compete with me

**Kageyama:** You always start it dumbass

**Kenma:** Everyone's energy is incredible today

**-**

**Sugawara:** Lol I want to sleep forever

**Sugawara:** Daichi come over

**Daichi:** I’m about to submit my essay then I’ll be right over

**Asahi:** When they make plans in the groupchat

**Sugawara:** I’m having a bad day, can I please get a pass?

**Asahi:** Only because Daichi will beat me up if I don’t give you one

**Bokuto:** you are 5000 feet taller than him

**Asahi:** I think you underestimate Daichi’s strength

**Asahi:** He has put so much fear in me since we were first years at Karasuno

**Daichi:** Maybe if you didn’t give me reasons to be mad, I wouldn’t have to resort to using my strength

**Asahi:** That’s scary

**Sugawara:** That’s hot

**Sugawara:** Daichi I feel ugly so hurry up and make me feel pretty lol

**Daichi:** You are pretty

**Sugawara:** apparently not pretty enough for you because you aren’t here

**Daichi:** I’m putting my shoes on right now

**Daichi:** And stop that Suga, you’re the prettiest person I’ve ever met

**Kenma:** Imagine looking like Suga and thinking you’re ugly lmao

**Sugawara:** Stop stop stop

**Daichi:** Suga, I’m bringing you dinner by the way

**Sugawara:** 😡

**Sugawara:** I want to be skinty 

**Daichi:** It’s something light

**Sugawara:** You’re gonna show up with a whole pizza, I know it

**Daichi:** Incorrect

**Daichi:** We’re making pasta together

**Sugawara:** “light”

**Daichi:** Pasta and a ✨salad ✨

**Daichi:** I just want you to eat a little of both

**Sugawara:** 😡

**Kuroo:** Word on the street is that pasta makes your ass fat

**Sugawara:** hm

**Sugawara:** maybe I’ll eat some pasta then

**Daichi:** Good

**Sugawara:** Is my ass not fat enough for you???

**Daichi:** No, I just want my boyfriend to eat something

**Sugawara:** I’ll have you know, I had breakfast this morning

**Daichi:** an iced vanilla latte

**Sugawara:** Yes, breakfast

**Daichi:** I’ll be over in 20 minutes

**Sugawara:** THATS NOT FAST ENOUGH

**Daichi:** lmao okay, then do you want to go to the store with me?

**Sugawara:** Yes

**Sugawara:** I want to hold your hand

**Sugawara:** lol

**Sugawara:** Yeah you got that something

**Sugawara:** I think you’ll understand

**Sugawara:** When I tell you something

**Sugawara:** I wanna hold your hand

**Sugawara:** Daichi that’s our song of the day

**Daichi:** lol okay 💗

**Oikawa:** Suga is awfully needy today

**Sugawara:** it’s because I look ugly so I need reassurance from Daichi 

**Sugawara:** I’m toxic

**Akaashi:** You’re not ugly

**Akaashi:** you’re very pretty

**Sugawara:** AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** lol 🥰

**Sugawara:** THE PRETTIEST BITCH HERE CALLED ME PRETTY STOP

**Oikawa:** um

**Oikawa:** Where am I on this pretty scale??

**Sugawara:** Right by Akaashi of course

**Sugawara:** Then Kenma and Yamaguchi. They’re right next to each other because they’re both that pretty and cute mix

**Yamaguchi:** Aw suga 💖

**Kenma:** I’m so embarrassed 

**Oikawa:** Where are you on this list?

**Sugawara:** I’m not on it?

**Yamaguchi:** wut

**Oikawa:** you ARE ON THIS LIST

**Sugawara:** I’m on the ugliest bitch on earth list

**Daichi:** Suga, I’m here

**Daichi:** And stop saying things like that

**Sugawara:** I’m being truthful

**Daichi:** would you get your gorgeous ass down here so we can go to the store?

**Sugawara:** I’m out of lip gloss

**Sugawara:** Daichi will you please buy me more lip gloss

**Sugawara:** idk why I run out so quick

**Daichi:** Because you wont stop putting it on at like midnight lmao

**Daichi:** I’ll buy you lip gloss lol

**Sugawara:** 💗💗💗💗

**Nishinoya:** Sugar daddy Daichi

**Sugawara:** Daddy Daichi

**Iwaizumi:** Stop

-

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ Daichi FUCKS _

**Sugawara: ☺️**

**Oikawa:** What a change in mood

**Sugawara:** Because Daichi FUCKS

**Nishinoya:** YES YES YES OMG YES ASAHI LOOK ASAHI

**Asahi:** I see it lol

**Sugawara:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** He’s sleeping

**Yamaguchi:** AHHH DONT SEND PICS OF YOU GUYS CUDDLING WITHOUT WARNING

**Yamaguchi:** ITS TOO CUTE AND I WILL VOM

**Sugawara:** ALSO

**Sugawara:** I TOOK A QUIZ ON MY ANIME CHARACTER TROPE AND I GOT HORNY

**Sugawara:** EXPLAIN THAT TO ME PLEASE LIKE HOW

**Oikawa:** he says underneath a picture of his boyfriend post-nut napping

**Tanaka:** POST-NUT NAPPING AHAHAH YEAH WHAT SUGA YOURE CRAZY

**Kuroo:** Even that character trope quiz knew you were horny. I’m scared of you

**Bokuto:** I took it and got Big Dicked HAHAHA

**Iwaizumi:** me too lmao

**Sugawara:** So no one is going to defend me

**Kenma:** If the shoe fits, wear it

**Sugawara:** So no one here respects me

**Sugawara:** Well, I’m gonna kiss Daichi until he wakes up bye and I hate you all 😘

**Oikawa:** why is he in denial. He’s literally so horny.

**Kuroo:** He scares me sometimes


	54. head empty thoughts maggie bc i MISS YOU IDIOT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: I haven’t stopped peeing i haven’t stopped peeing
> 
> Akaashi: Why do you say that

_ Daichi FUCKS _

**Kuroo:** OMG

**Kuroo:** GUYS

**Kuroo:** I JUST FOUND THE WEIRDEST THING IN KENMA’S ROOM

**Kenma:** Nooooo

**Kenma:** Stoppp

**Kenma:** Don’t tell the groupchat on me you’re so sexyyyyy

**Nishinoya:** AHAHAHA

**Sugawara:** OMGOMGOMGOMG

**Sugawara:** OMGOMGOMG WHAT IS IT WHAT IS IT

**Daichi:** Calm down Suga

**Sugawara:** I can’t I’m just so excited!!!!

**Sugawara:** That panties incident set my expectations so high!!!

**Kuroo:** PANTIES

**Kuroo:** HE WEARS THEM IN FRONT OF ME IF I ASK🤤🥵😍

**Kuroo:** I BOUGHT HIM LACE ONES A FEW DAYS AGO

**Kageyama:** Why did you use those emojis?

**Kenma:** STOP TALKING ABOUT THOSE I HATE YOU

**Sugawara:** YES

**Kuroo:** ANYWAY

**Kuroo:** WE WERE MAKING OUT AND THINGS WERE GETTING STEAMY

**Sugawara:** OMG OMG OMG PANTIES ???

**Kuroo:** YES, THE NEW LACE ONES

**Nishinoya:** OMG OMG OMG KUROO FUCKS ??????

**Kuroo:** WELL 

**Kuroo:** NO.

**Kuroo:** BECAUSE I WENT TO BE ROUGH WITH HIM 🤤🤤🤤🤤

**Kageyama:** Again with the emojis

**Kuroo:** AND UNDERESTIMATED MY STRENGTH

**Kuroo:** AND HOW MUCH HE WEIGHS

**Oikawa:** WAIT AHAHAHA I KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING

**Oikawa:** THAT HAPPENS TO ME AND IWA-CHAN ALL THE TIME

**Kuroo:** I THREW HIM OFF HIS BED

**Kenma:** I’m still sore from that, asshole

**Kuroo:** I’M SO SORRY

**Kuroo:** SO HE HITS THE FLOOR RIGHT NEXT TO HIS NIGHT STAND 

**Kenma:** Uhhhhhh wait

**Kenma** has removed  **Oikawa** from the chat

**Sugawara:** ?

**Kuroo:** AND I FND A DRAWING OF OIKAWA AND IWAIZUMI

**Kuroo:** FUCKING????

**Sugawara:** WHAT AHAHAHA

**Akaashi:** Omg wait have you finished it yet?

**Kenma:** No it’s taking forever 

**Kenma:** I can’t draw dicks 

**Kenma:** They’re so hard

**Kuroo:** AHAHAHA

**Bokuto:** AHAHAHAHA

**Kenma:** I want to kill you guys

**Hinata:** Why

**Hinata:** Why are you drawing that Kenma

**Kenma:** Iwaizumi asked me to

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** Lol

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa made a joke like a week ago about needing a professional to paint us fucking

**Iwaizumi:** Because it’s ‘so beautiful’ and he wants to ‘look at it all the time’

**Iwaizumi:** I know he was joking 

**Iwaizumi:** But when I was telling Kuroo about it Kenma overheard and wouldn’t stop laughing and I asked him to draw it

**Iwaizumi:** I’m going to give it to him for his birthday and ruin his day

**Hinata:** You’re so mean

**Sugawara:** THAT’S SO FUNNY

**Hinata:** IT ISN’T. IT’S WEIRD

**Sugawara:** KENMA DRAW ME AND DAICHI

**Daichi:** Suga, no, it’s weird

**Kenma:** It’s a little weird

**Kenma:** But also it’s funny

**Kenma:** I had to read a lot of yaoi to try and understand how to draw it tho 

**Akaashi:** Ohhh noooooooo

**Kenma:** Horrible literally horrible

**Kuroo:** Kenma you read that shit anyways

**Kenma:** Don’t make me kill you

-

**Nishinoya:** Asahi

**Nishinoya:** Asahi Asahi Asahi

**Nishinoya:** BABE

**Nishinoya:** BABE BABE BABE

**Asahi:** Yuu, stop embarrassing me in the groupchat

**Nishinoya:** My roots are growing in :-(

**Kageyama:** The nose!!

**Nishinoya:** Anything for my man 😎

**Nishinoya:** Anyway MY ROOTS ARE GROWING IN

**Asahi:** Okay??

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI

**Nishinoya:** CAN YOU BLEACH MY HAIR FOR ME AGAIN

**Nishinoya:** I CAN’T LOOK LIKE THIS

**Nishinoya:** IT’S HORRIBLE

**Asahi:** Oh. Yes of course!!!

**Asahi:** Anything for you

**Nishinoya:** SKDHFjshdfKJHG

**Asahi:** What

**Nishinoya:** AWSHAI YOU’RE SO CYTE

**Sugawara:** How

**Sugawara:** How did you get so flustered from that

**Oikawa:** Noya you’re weak

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI NEVER COMPLIMENTS ME IN THE GROUPCHAT

**Nishinoya:** HE’S ALWAYS TOO EMBARRASSED 

**Tanaka:** _ attached image _

**Tanaka:** LOOK HOW RED HIS FACE IS

**Nishinoya:** RYU!!!! WHY!!!!!!!!!!

**Tanaka:** AHAHAHAHA

**Nishinoya:** YOU’VE BETRAYED ME

**Tanaka:** IT’S WHAT YOU DESERVE

**Nishinoya:** I NEVER KNEW YOU HATED ME THIS MUCH

**Tanaka:** AHAHAHAHAHA

**Daichi:** What is this

**Daichi:** Stop

**Daichi:** You two are such headaches

**Tanaka:** SORRY DAICHI

**Nishinoya:** SORRY DAICHI

**Nishinoya:** Asahi can I come over tomorrow??? :-) :-) 

**Asahi:** Come over tonight and spend the night! 

**Nishinoya:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Nishinoya:** OKAY!!!!!!!!

-

**Hinata** changed the group name to _ :-( _

**Kageyama:** Stop :-(

**Kageyama:** I’m sorry :-(

**Hinata:** It’s not your fault!

**Kenma:** What

**Kenma:** What happened

**Kenma:** Kageyama what did you do

**Kenma:** I’ll kill you

**Kageyama:** I broke his finger

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** TOBIO WHAT DID YOU DO

**Kageyama:** I DON’T KNOW

**Kageyama:** IT WAS AN ACCIDENT

**Kageyama:** I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW IT HAPPENED

**Hinata:** I CAN’T PLAY VOLLEYBALL 

**Hinata:** MY LIFE IS OVER

**Kageyama:** SHUT UP IDIOT NO IT ISN’T

**Oikawa:** DON’T CALL HIM AN IDIOT

**Hinata:** LET HIM CALL ME AN IDIOT

**Hinata:** IT MAKES ME FEEL BETTER

**Oikawa:** YOU’RE A FREAK

**Hinata:** It’s on my right hand too :-(

**Hinata:** MY LIFE IS OVER

**Kageyama:** IDIOT. STOP

**Sugawara:** All of you calm down.

**Sugawara:** What happened?

**Hinata:** Um

**Hinata:** We were um

**Hinata:** Um um 

**Nishinoya:** FUCKING???

**Kageyama:** Shouyou you don’t need to tell them

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU????

**Kenma:** DON’T MAKE ME PEE 

**Hinata:** KENMA STOP BEING WEIRD

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU YOU STOP BEING WEIRD

**Hinata:** WHAT DID I EVEN DO

**Kenma:** BREAK YOUR FINGER WHILE FUCKING KAGEYAMA

**Hinata:** AHHHHHHHH

**Nishinoya:** THEY WERE FUCKING THEY WERE FUCKING 

**Hinata:** NOYA STOP

**Kageyama** has left the group

**Nishinoya** added **Kageyama** to the group

**Oikawa:** I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THIS

**Oikawa:** PLEASE STOP

**Hinata:** WE DIDN’T ACTUALLY GET AROUND TO IT…

**Nishinoya:** NOOOOOOOO

**Hinata:** HE BROKE MY FINGER WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME

**Kuroo:** ONE TIME I TRIED TO FLIP KENMA OVER AND I SOMEHOW KNOCKED INTO A WALL AND HIT MY HEAD REALLY HARD

**Kuroo:** IT GAVE ME THE WORST HEADACHE FOR A FEW DAYS

**Kuroo:** BUT WE STILL FUCKED

**Hinata:** OKAY?????

**Nishinoya:** PRIORITIES 

**Oikawa:** STOP 

**Sugawara:** Are you 100% it’s broken?

**Hinata:** No, but it’s swollen

**Hinata:** And I can’t bend it

**Hinata:** It’s bruised and it’s bent weird

**Hinata:** He keeps kissing it and apologising 

**Kenma:** That’s it

**Kenma:** I’m peeing

**Hinata:** He’s making me go to the doctors for it to find out but I’m pretty sure

**Sugawara:** Well, at least you’re going in

**Nishinoya:** Yeah but they didn’t fuck so what’s the point

**Asahi:** Noya why are you like this

**Nishinoya:** I’m just trying to fulfill my job as a matchmaker!

**Oikawa:** I hate you

**Oikawa:** I hope you feel better soon Shouyou

**Hinata:** Thanks

**Hinata:** I can’t play volleyball

**Sugawara:** You said that already

**Hinata:** But I can’t play volleyball

**Daichi:** We know

**Hinata:** I CAN’T PLAY VOLLEYBALL

**Kenma:** STOP

**Hinata:** I CAN’T PLAY VOLLEYBALL

**Hinata:** I CAN’T STOP CRYING

**Bokuto:** NOOO HINATA

**Sugawara:** STOP IT’S ONLY FOR A LITTLE WHILE

**Hinata:** MY LIFE IS OVER MY LIFE IS OVER

**Kenma:** STOP STOP STOP

**Hinata:** I CAN’T STOP CRYING

**Oikawa:** AHHHHHH

**Sugawara:** UM UM HUG KAGEYAMA IDK IDK 

**Sugawara:** HINATA WE’VE NEVER HAD TO DEAL WITH YOU CRYING

**Hinata:** I CAN’T STOP

**Oikawa:** SHUT UP WE KNOW

**Hinata:** I’M GONNA JUST 

**Hinata:** HUG KAGEYAMA

**Sugawara:** GOOD IDEA

-

**Kageyama:** It’s broken

**Kageyama:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** HE HAS A FINGER CAST LOL

**Sugawara:** HE LOOKS LIKE AN IDIOT

**Bokuto:** IS HE CRYING

**Kageyama:** He was

**Kageyama:** It hurts and he’s upset, leave him alone

**Oikawa:** Protective Tobio!! I love it

**Kenma:** I haven’t stopped peeing i haven’t stopped peeing

**Akaashi:** Why do you say that

**Kenma:** Idk it’s funny and it also just feels right

**Akaashi:** Ok. 

**Akaashi:** I’m peeing I’m peeing

**Sugawara:** Akaashi what 

**Akaashi:** I’m trying it out

**Oikawa:** Stop sharing a beraincell. It’s weird

**Kenma:** Learn how to spell braincell and we might 🥰

**Iwaizumi:** Learn how to spell brain cell

**Tanaka:** Learn 

**Nishinoya:** Brain cell

**Daichi:** Ok that’s enough


	55. STOP I MISS YOU SO MUCH IM GONNA DIE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Asahi: NOYA IS SO CUTE
> 
> Tanaka: you’re being so… ugly? Right now?
> 
> Nishinoya: I might have to disagree with you
> 
> Nishinoya: ASAHI IS BEING THE CUTEST RIGHT NOW

_ Daichi FUCKS _

**Kageyama:** Good morning everyone

**Kuroo:** Good morning😍😍

**Bokuto:** GOOD MORNING KAGEYAMA

**Akaashi:** Are you in a good mood?

**Kageyama:** I guess

**Kageyama:** I just kinda missed everyone lol

**Sugawara:** Kageyama 🥺

**Oikawa:** Why are you being cute. You’re not supposed to be cute

**Oikawa:** By the way

**Oikawa:** We had a small like, Aoba Johsai reunion dinner

**Oikawa:** Kindaichi kept talking about you

**Hinata:** Ew why

**Iwaizumi:** lol we brought up the group chat and he was asking if you were okay and stuff

**Kageyama:** He never texts me lol

**Oikawa:** Because no one wants to text you

**Hinata:** I DO

**Kuroo:** I DO

**Bokuto:** I DO

**Iwaizumi:** I do

**Oikawa:** Eliza

**Oikawa:** WAIT WHAT

**Kuroo:** I never felt so- HELPLESS YEAHHHH

**Oikawa:** NO WAIT WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** I text Kageyama sometimes lol

**Oikawa:** Tobio you CANNOT TAKE MY BOYFRIEND

**Kageyama:** I don’t want to?

**Kageyama:** I have a boyfriend?

**Oikawa:** ARE YOU GUYS GONNA KISS TOO

**Iwaizumi:** It was once

**Hinata:** THAT'S ONE TIME TOO MANY

**Kageyama:** You’re both so weird

**Oikawa:** we’re both HEARTBROKEN

**Asahi:** Omg guys guys

**Asahi:** _ Attached image _

**Asahi:** I’m going through my high school photo album

**Sugawara:** omg omg when we locked Daichi out of the gym and he didn’t talk to us for three days 💔

**Sugawara:** The worst three days of my life

**Tanaka:** He was so mad for something so minor

**Sugawara:** It was winter

**Sugawara:** I would be cold and angry

**Asahi:** Okay so why didn’t you unlock the door??

**Sugawara:** Because I like to see him angry

**Asahi:** ….

**Sugawara:** Idk I like when he scolds me sometimes but that time he just IGNORED ME FOR THREE DAYS

**Nishinoya:** HAHAHA SUGA YOURE SO SCARY

**Oikawa:** why are you like that suga 

**Asahi:** _ Attached image _

**Asahi:** LOOK AT HOW CUTE MY NOYA IS

**Asahi:** HIS UNIFORM LOOKS SO CUTE ON HIM OMG

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI STOP OMG

**Asahi:** IM WEEPING NOYA

**Kageyama:** Weeping

**Akaashi:** Thats so impractical 

**Asahi:** IM WEEPING

**Asahi:** NOYA IS SO CUTE

**Tanaka:** you’re being so… ugly? Right now?

**Nishinoya:** I might have to disagree with you

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI IS BEING THE CUTEST RIGHT NOW

**Asahi:** 😚

**Nishinoya:** 😚

**Sugawara:** TEXT KISSING IS ME AND DAICHIS THING

**Nishinoya:** Where is Daichi?

**Sugawara:** He’s sleeping still

**Asahi:** 😚

**Nishinoya:** 😚

**Sugawara:** STOP THAT

**Oikawa:** 😚

**Iwaizumi:** 😚

**Sugawara:** NO 

**Tsukishima: 😚**

**Yamaguchi: 😚**

**Sugawara:** I HATE YOU ALL!!!

**-**

**Oikawa:** My boyfriend hates me🥰

**Kenma:** what happened?

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan is so mean and doesn’t pay attention to me

**Oikawa:** He has been working so much 

**Oikawa:** And I miss him

**Oikawa:** We haven’t hung out in a while

**Hinata:** Aw he's not doing it on purpose though

**Iwaizumi:** I’m not, idiot! And I don’t hate you

**Iwaizumi:** Our anniversary is coming up and I have a plan for us so calm down dumbass. I’m trying to save money

**Kageyama:** When is your anniversary

**Iwaizumi:** New Years

**Sugawara:** Oooooh what are you guys gonna do??

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan booked us a room at an onsen

**Sugawara:** For New Years?!? 

**Iwaizumi:** That’s exactly why I’ve been working a lot lol

**Iwaizumi:** steep prices but it’s for Oikawa so it’s fine

**Nishinoya:** Sugar daddy Iwa-Chan

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t call me that

**Oikawa:** DONT CALL HIM THAT

**Nishinoya:** Don’t call him sugar daddy? Or Iwa-Chan?

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t call me either of those

**Nishinoya:** 😧

**-**

**Sugawara:** IMPORTANT QUESTION 

**Sugawara:** EVERYONE COME HERE

**Sugawara:** I’m assuming all of you are here

**Sugawara:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** Which ones should I get

**Daichi:** the first ones. I like the light pink

**Asahi:** You have so many shoes

**Sugawara:** Shoes distract from my ugly face ☺️

**Daichi:** Stop that

**Sugawara:** So Daichi likes the first one

**Sugawara:** And I know I said you all need to be here

**Sugawara:** But Daichi replied sooner than I thought lmao so I’ll get the first one

**Sugawara:** Thank you all for participating 🥰🥰

**Oikawa:** Good thing I was gonna say the first one lol

**Sugawara:** Great! I’ll update everyone when they come in

**Akaashi:** omg yes I want to see what you wear them with

**Sugawara:** Akaashi we’re gonna be great friends

**Akaashi:** 😍

**Sugawara:** 😍

**Kenma:** It has begun

**Kuroo:** uh oh

**Oikawa:** why uh oh?

**Kenma:** Akaashi power is truly something else when he makes new friends

**Bokuto:** Especially friends with the same energy as his

**Kenma:** Chaos chaos chaos

**Kuroo:** you’re so weird


	56. Absolute shit like this episode fucking sucks BUT I MISS YOU STUPID IDIOT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi: Glad to see he picked up my hobby 🤪🤪🤪
> 
> Tsukishima: It’s less of a hobby and more of an addiction 
> 
> Yamaguchi: It’s therapeutic

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ Scarred 😳🤪 _

**Oikawa:** Oh god

**Oikawa:** What happened??

**Sugawara:** I’m feeling

**Sugawara:** Faint

**Sugawara:** I’m feeling

**Sugawara:** like I want to die

**Asahi:** ??????!?!!?

**Asahi:** It’s so late. Are you okay???!

**Sugawara:** Yes. But, mentally, I’m damaged

**Sugawara:** I had a dream 

**Sugawara:** Maybe a nightmare

**Sugawara:** That me and Tanaka fucked

**Oikawa:** you’re dramatic

**Nishinoya:** HAAHAHAH NO WAY NO WAY

**Nishinoya:** NICE TANAKA

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Tanaka FUCKS _

**Sugawara:** oh no 

**Sugawara:** I was

**Sugawara:** I was the top

**Sugawara: 🤢🤢🤢🤢** EW EW

**Sugawara:** ME?!!! A TOP?!???!

**Nishinoya:** SCREAMING I AM SCREAMING

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Suga FUCKS?!???!!? _

**Sugawara:** That was disgusting

**Tanaka:** Stop you’re hurting my feelings

**Sugawara:** 0/10 

**Sugawara:** I do not recommend fucking Tanaka in your dream

**Oikawa:** YOURE SO WEIRD

**Tanaka:** 💔💔💔💔😭😭😭😭😭

**Tanaka:** Suga, LOVE ME PLEASE

**Daichi:** Tanaka, you’re dead

**Tanaka:** WHAT DID I DO

**Sugawara:** Dryest wet dream I’ve ever had

**Daichi:** Suga

**Daichi:** Stop talking about this

**Tanaka:** SUGA😢😢😢😢

**Sugawara:** Daichi, I’m traumatized

**Sugawara:** Daichi, I’m disgusted 

**Daichi:** It’s kinda pissing me off so please stop

**Oikawa:** When he’s jealous of a dream suga didn’t even enjoy

**Daichi:** Shut up

**Tanaka:** Daichi please let Suga love me

**Sugawara:** I don’t want you!

**Kuroo:** Tanaka goes HAHAHA HE GOES

**Kuroo:** Just give him what he wants and you can have me

**Kuroo:** And suga goes HAHAHA HE GOES I don’t want you!

**Daichi:** you’re obsessed with Hamilton 

**Kuroo:** I WOULD DIE WITHOUT LIN MANUEL MIRANDA

**Oikawa:** Well, back to sugas dream

**Daichi:** No

**Daichi:** We’re done talking about that

**Tanaka: 😧😧** Daichi doesn’t want to see me winning😣😣😣😤😫😭😭😱😱

**Daichi:** You’re annoying

**Tanaka:** You’re possessive

**Daichi:** He’s my boyfriend!!!

**Tanaka:** For now 🥴

**Daichi** removed  **Tanaka** from the group

**Nishinoya:** My bro 😧 my rock 😧

**Nishinoya:** He’s gone😧

**Daichi:** Good

**Daichi:** He can earn his way back in

**Sugawara:** 😍 Daichi I wanna kisssssss youuuuuu

**Daichi:** lol okay, are you gonna come over?

**Sugawara:** Omw omw 

**Iwaizumi:** So weird

**-**

**Kageyama:** Hinata is embroidering everything

**Kageyama:** I have no more plain shirts

**Tsukishima:** Tell him to stop

**Kageyama:** No

**Tsukishima:** Okay?

**Yamaguchi:** Glad to see he picked up my hobby 🤪🤪🤪

**Tsukishima:** It’s less of a hobby and more of an addiction 

**Yamaguchi:** It’s therapeutic

**Yamaguchi:** And kinda tedious

**Yamaguchi:** So I feel less bored 

**Kageyama:** _ Attached Image _

**Kageyama:** _ Attached Image _

**Kageyama:** _ Attached Image _

**Kageyama:** _ Attached Image _

**Kageyama:** _ Attached Image _

**Kageyama:** _ Attached Image _

**Akaashi:** oh my

**Akaashi:** Wait

**Akaashi:** The pillowcase is kinda cute lol

**Kageyama:** My name is on the other pillowcase

**Hinata:** We have to know who’s is who’s

**Kageyama:** Lmaoooo

**Kenma:** LMAOOO SHOUYOU YOURE SO STUPID AHAH

**Hinata:** literally why

**Kenma:** STOP EMBROIDERING EVERYTHING YOURE INSANE

**Hinata:** Sorry that I was given this talent and you weren’t

**Kuroo:** Kenma would embroider cats on everything

**Kenma:** Yes

**Kenma:** Kuro

**Kenma:** Buy me an embroidery floss please

**Kuroo:** NO

**Kenma:** You never do anything for me

**Kenma:** It’s like you hate me

**Kenma:** Like you want to break up AND you want me dead

**Kuroo:** I literally don’t

**Sugawara:** So mean Kuroo

**Oikawa:** That’s kinda rude Kuroo

**Akaashi:** What a terrible boyfriend

**Kuroo:** WHY DO YOU GUYS ALWAYS DO THIS

**Yamaguchi:** Wow, and you yell at Kenma’s friends?? 

**Yamaguchi:** Kenma, you can do so much better

**Kuroo:** THIS GROUPCHAT FUCKING SUCKS

**-**

**Nishinoya:** I CANT FIND SUZU

**Kenma:** OH NO NO NONO

**Asahi:** ???!!??

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI DONT KILL ME I CANT FIND HER!!!!

**Asahi:** What were you doing??

**Nishinoya:** TAKING A NAP

**Nishinoya:** SHE WAS ON YOUR BED AND NOW SHES GONE AND IDK IDK

**Nishinoya:** IM CRYING

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI I LOST OUR DAUGHTER IM SORRY

**Nishinoya:** IM CRYING IM CRYING

**Asahi:** calm down Noya.

**Asahi:** She likes to sit behind the curtain when I’m gone

**Asahi:** Maybe she’s waiting there

**Nishinoya:** OH MY GOD SHE WAS THERE

**Nishinoya:** IM CRYING AGAIN

**Asahi:** lol stop crying

**Asahi:** I’m almost home anyways

**Nishinoya:** THANK GOD SHES ALRIGHT

**Sugawara:** Throwback to when Noya hated her

**Nishinoya:** I do😒

**Asahi:** You don’t

**Sugawara:** You literally don't but okay 


	57. This episode is literally so so so so shit it's so bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: OH MY GOD WHY ARE YOU GUYS DOING THIS  
> Oikawa: STOP TRYING TO STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT FROM ME

_ Suga FUCKS?!???!!? _

**Kenma:** MY LIFE IS OVER

**Hinata:** Wut

**Kenma:** MY LIFE IS HORRIBLE

**Akaashi:** It’s 10AM, you don’t need to be screaming.

**Kenma:** I JUST WOKE UP

**Kenma:** AND I WAS BRUSHING MY TEETH AND I THREW UP OUT OF NOWHERE

**Sugawara:** Omg are you ok

**Kenma:** YEAH BUT LIKE WHY DID THAT HAPPEN TO ME

**Kuroo:** Have you eaten?

**Kenma:** I ate lunch yesterday

**Kuroo:** Kenma!

**Kenma:** I JUST WOKE UP

**Kenma:** And I’m ugly today so

**Kuroo:** Don’t start that

**Daichi:** Wow this sounds a little familiar

**Sugawara:** I don’t know what you mean

**Iwaizumi:** Wow this sounds a little familiar

**Oikawa:** I don’t know what you mean

**Tsukishima:** Wow this sounds a little familiar

**Yamaguchi:** I don’t know what you mean

**Hinata:** Why are you all like this?

**Kuroo:** Kenma I’m coming over to cook you breakfast and take care of you all day ✨

**Kenma:** You don’t have to

**Kuroo:** But I’m going to bc I love you more than life itself 

**Kenma:** Why

**Kenma:** It’s not like I’m anything special

**Sugawara:** Kenma I’m gonna kill you

**Kenma:** Please 

**Sugawara:** Nvm 

**Kenma:** Ugh

**Kuroo:** Stop it!!! I’m coming over to kiss you so much

**Kenma:** Give me 100 kisses 

**Kuroo:** Okay

**Kenma:** Give me 200 kisses

**Kuroo:** Okay

**Kenma:** I’ll be counting

**Kuroo:** Okay

**Kenma:** Give me 40982 kisses and eat my ass 

**Kuroo:** Okay

**Oikawa:** Sugawara’s influence rn

**Sugawara:** WHAT HOW IS THAT MY INFLUENCE

**Nishinoya:** Horny Kenma?

**Kuroo:** Horny Kenma 😌

**Kenma:** 100924381 kisses and eat my ass and let me suck your dick 

**Oikawa** set  **Kenma’s** name to  **Sugawara #2**

**Sugawara:** STOP 

**Sugawara:** I DIDN’T DO THIS

**Oikawa:** YOU’RE A TOXIC INFLUENCE ON INFLUENTIAL MINDS

**Nishinoya:** I think you guys are missing something big here

**Nishinoya:** And that’s

**Nishinoya:** HORNY KENMA HORNY KENMA

**Kuroo:** HORNY KENMA HORNY KENMA

-

**Kenma:** when u get a bruise on ur hip from him holding you while he rails ur ass 🤤✨✨

**Oikawa:** UM?????

**Oikawa** : I'M SO APPALLED 

**Sugawara:** YES YES YES ISN'T THAT THE BEST

**Oikawa:** SO SO SO APPALLED 

**Nishinoya:** YESSSSSS

**Oikawa:** AHHHHHH IWA-CHAN HELP I’M SO SCARED

**Kenma:** _ attached image _

**Kenma:** LOOK AT THIS BRUISE

**Oikawa:** NOOOOOOOO

**Sugawara:** YESS YESS YESS 

**Sugawara:** THE NAIL IMPRINTS? ICONIC

**Oikawa:** NO NO NNO NO

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** LOOK AT THIS ONE

**Kenma:** YES 

**Oikawa:** NO NO STO P

**Oikawa:** WHY IS NO ONE ESLE REPLYING I’M SO TRAUMATISED RIGHT NOW

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Kuroo and Daichi FUCK _

**Sugawara:** NOOOOO 

**Sugawara:** NO THEY DON’T NO THEY DON’T

**Nishinoya:** HAHAHA BAD WORDING

**Oikawa:** AHAHAHA

**Kageyama** changed the group name to  _ Stop _

**Nishinoya:** Yes King

**Oikawa:** For once I’m agreeing with Tobio

**Sugawara:** Boo

**Kenma:** Boo

**-**

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** FEELS BAD SCOOB

**Oikawa:** SO SO SO BAD

**Sugawara:** Who is that? I’m an idiot ✨

**Oikawa:** Terushima

**Sugawara:** That guy who won’t leave u alone?

**Sugawara:** Why is he trying to guilt trip you into responding to him

**Kenma:** WHY AM I LAUGHING

**Oikawa:** DON’T LAUGH I FEEL BAD

**Kuroo:** Hey cutie 😍🤤🥰💞

**Kenma:** Please 😩😩 answer me…😭🙏🏼 you’re the only 👊👅 person I can 🤯🥰🥺 and want 😩🥵💦 to talk to….💕🍆👄👅🥵

**Oikawa:** I HATE BOTH OF YOU 

**Oikawa:** DON’T MAKE THIS A JOKE

**Oikawa:** I’M SO UNCOMFORTABLE 

**Oikawa:** I NEED TO RESPOND BUT LIKE ????????? I’VE TOLD HIM A BILLION TIMES I’M NOT INTERESTED 

**Kuroo:** You’ve given him a million sorry’s 😔😔

**Kenma:** How about a billion sorry’s 😢😔

**Kuroo:** Ooh 😫

**Kenma:** You shine just like the stars and he’s not even a nightlight 🤩🤩😭

**Kuroo:** Cause what he did wasn’t so bright 😭💡

**Sugawara:** THIS ENERGY

**Oikawa:** STOP

**Akaashi:** Why do you need to respond to him?

**Oikawa:** I feel bad

**Akaashi:** He’s guilt-tripping you. 

**Oikawa:** I know that 

**Oikawa:** But it’s working

**Oikawa:** I’m guilted 

**Akaashi:** Block him

**Akaashi:** He’s manipulative

**Sugawara:** Where’s Iwaizumi? I feel like he has some strong opinions on this

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan is asleep 🥰

**Oikawa:** And I don’t want to bother him with something like this

**Oikawa:** EXCUSE ME DAICHI STOP CALLING IWA-CHAN

**Kuroo:** Hello hello baby you called I can’t hear a thing 😫👂

**Kenma:** I have got no service in the club something somethinnn 🕺🥳

**Daichi:** Did it wake him up?

**Oikawa:** YES

**Iwaizumi:** I’m going to ✨💖 kill Terushima 💖✨

**Oikawa:** STOP

**Kuroo:** AHAHAHA THE EMOJIS

**Kenma:** Hey Kuro 💖✨

**Kuroo:** Hey Kenma 💖✨

**Oikawa:** WOULD YOU TWO STOP

**Oikawa:** ANYWAY I’M GOING TO DO IT 

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN HAS CONVINCED ME

**Oikawa:** I’M BLOCKING HIM

**Kageyama:** You don’t really have to announce it this dramatically 

**Oikawa:** Tobio i didn’t ask

**Hinata:** Don’t be so mean

**Oikawa:** Shouyou i didn’t ask

**Kuroo:** You’ve got opinions, man. We’re all entitled to ‘em, but I never asked. 🤬🤨🖕

**Kenma:** Who died and made you king of anything?⚰️🏺👑

**Oikawa:** OH MY GOD WHY ARE YOU GUYS DOING THIS

**Oikawa:** STOP TRYING TO STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT FROM ME

**Kuroo:** The only person whose attention I’m trying to steal is Kenma’s

**Kuroo:** 😍

**Kenma:** Aww Kuro 🥰

**Kuroo:** I look into your eyes and the sky’s the limit 😍😍

**Kenma:** I’m helpless 😍💕🥰

**Nishinoya:** What is going on 

**Asahi:** I’m so scared

**Nishinoya:** Me too

**Nishinoya:** Kenma never quotes Hamilton

**Akaashi:** He does when he’s high

**Kenma** has left the chat

**Kuroo:** When you’re high and then you get extra high from such a good nut 😌😩

**Sugawara:** AHAHA WHY ARE YOU TALKING LIKE THAT

**Kuroo:** When I see the way you look 🥵🥵🤨

**Kuroo:** Shaken by how long it took 😩🍆👅🤤

**Kuroo:** I could do about anything 🕺🥵🥰

**Asahi:** Are you trying to make

**Asahi:** A song on the Steven Universe soundtrack

**Asahi:** Sexual??

**Kuroo:** You know it, baby 

**Kuroo** has left the chat

**Sugawara:** Literally what

**Oikawa:** Good riddance 

-

**Hinata:** I miss Kenma

**Hinata:** I miss Kenma so much

**Hinata:** Like

**Hinata:** I miss him so much that I’m depressed?

**Hinata:** I think I want to cry?

**Kageyama:** Don’t cry wtf

**Kuroo:** You saw him a few months ago

**Hinata:** That’s not enough!

**Kenma:** THAT’S NOT ENOUGH

**Kenma:** Shouyou I miss you so much

**Hinata:** I miss you MORE

**Kenma:** I MISS YOU THE MOST

**Hinata:** I MISS YOU MORE THAN THE MOST

**Hinata:** I’M SO SAD

**Kenma:** I’M SAD TOO

-

**Kenma:** It’s 6am

**Kuroo:** Yes, it is

**Kenma:** Kuro, it’s 6am

**Kenma:** Why did you wake me up at 6am Kuro?

**Akaashi:** Shut up

**Kenma:** Akaashi heart eyes heart eyes

**Akaashi:** Kenma heart eyes heart eyes

**Kenma:** Why are you awake?

**Akaashi:** I have to work

**Kenma:** Ew

**Kenma:** Kuro woke me up because he likes seeing me in pain

**Kuroo:** Shut up, we’re going somewhere 

**-**

**Hinata:** KENMA’S HERE????????????

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Hinata:** KENMA KENMA KENMA

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU SHOUYOU SHOUYOU

**Kenma:** KURO DROVE ME TO SEE SHOUYOU

**Kenma:** KURO I’M SO IN LOVE WITH YOU

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU SHOUYOU

**Hinata:** KENMA KENMA KENMA

**Tsukishima:** Stop being so annoying

**-**

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** Are you guys on a double date? 🥺

**Hinata:** Yes!

**Sugawara:** Daichi look 🥺

**Daichi:** I see, Suga

**Sugawara:** They’re so cute 

**Daichi:** They are

**Kuroo:** Are you calling me cute, Daichi?

**Sugawara:** Kuroo I’ll kill you


	58. My brain goes "After the war I went back to New York" and then after that it goes "Look at my son!" and then Lin Manuel Miranda is biting his lip 200000 times and its so SCARY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima: Thinking about when Hinata followed me to a training camp that he wasn’t invited to because he’s an embarrassing little garbage boy
> 
> Hinata: i’m not an embarrassing little garbage boy
> 
> Hinata: I don’t even know what that is
> 
> Yamaguchi: A garbage boy
> 
> Kageyama: He is embarrassing but he isn’t a garbage boy

_ Stop _

**Oikawa:** I’m so sad

**Oikawa:** I’m gonna go into labor I’m so sad

**Akaashi:** I don’t think I know what that means

**Oikawa:** I’m SAD

**Oikawa:** And idk why(*´꒳`*)

**Iwaizumi:** What a cute face

**Oikawa:** iwa-chan 💗💗💗💗

**Iwaizumi:** I’m bringing you ice cream

**Oikawa:** No nooo

**Oikawa:** I just want to sleep

**Iwaizumi:** We’ll take a nap and then you can eat your ice cream when you wake up

**Oikawa:** fine

**Oikawa:** I’m gonna take a bath. See you when you get here

**Iwaizumi:** kk

**Kuroo:** KK AHAHA 

**Oikawa:** Leave him alone

**Oikawa:** Bye

**Kuroo:** HAHAHA

**-**

**Oikawa:** I’m back

**Kenma:** Are feeling better?

**Akaashi:** Are feeling better

**Oikawa:** Yes

**Kenma:** Good stupid idiot bitch

**Kenma:** Don’t ever be sad

**Oikawa:** How sweet

**Oikawa:** It’s all thanks to Iwa-chan!!! ❤️💕💖

**Iwaizumi:** I took a nap with you

**Oikawa:** It’s all thanks to youuuu

**Sugawara:** That’s good!

**Oikawa:** Well, now that I’m back

**Oikawa:** I was going through it oopsoopsoops

**Oikawa:** And I was internally crying

**Oikawa:** Not sure what all that is about

**Daichi:** Can someone internally cry

**Oikawa:** Idk but like

**Oikawa:** It’s when you feel like you’re crying but you aren’t but it feels like you are so you just would rather die because nothing causes it and it just happens

**Oikawa:** Haha

**Oikawa:** ANYWAYS

**Oikawa:** Let's talk about my craving for a nice pair of dark wash jeans paired with a clear double grommet belt

**Iwaizumi:** I’ve been telling you to buy them for two weeks now

**Oikawa:** Yes

**Oikawa:** But if I buy them tonight, I’ll be broke sooner

**Iwaizumi:** You will not be broke

**Iwaizumi:** And you’ve been wanting it forever

**Oikawa:** But what if it goes out of style?

**Iwaizumi:** That doesn’t mean it won’t look good

**Oikawa:** I need to think on it

**Iwaizumi:** You’re so toxic for me

**Oikawa:** LITERALLY WHY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

**-**

**Yamaguchi:** Thinking about when we were out and Hinata spilled his coffee all over Tsukki

**Yamaguchi:** And Tsukki was so pissed and wouldn’t talk to Hinata or Kageyama

**Kageyama:** I still don’t know why he was mad at me

**Tsukishima:** Because I felt like it

**Kageyama:** Sick

**Tsukishima:** Thinking about when Hinata followed me to a training camp that he wasn’t invited to because he’s an embarrassing little garbage boy

**Hinata:** i’m not an embarrassing little garbage boy

**Hinata:** I don’t even know what that is

**Yamaguchi:** A garbage boy

**Kageyama:** He is embarrassing but he isn’t a garbage boy

**Hinata:** IM NOT EMBARASSING

**Kenma:** WHO SNEAKS INTO A TRAINING CAMP?!?!?! AN INVITE ONLY TRAINING CAMP

**Oikawa:** Embarrassing people

**Daichi:** Who woke up with a bump on their head because they were showing off to Lev and ended up bumping their head on the door frame?

**Asahi:** Embarrassing people

**Sugawara:** Who is literally so weird that they got so excited and put their jacket on as pants?

**Tanaka:** HAHAA EMBARRASSING PEOPLE

**Kageyama:** Who tripped getting on the train and then tripped again while getting off

**Hinata:** I never knew this was a hate group

**Hinata** changed the group name to  **BRB CRYING**

**Oikawa:** WHO LITERALLY CANNOT FROST A CAKE

**Tanaka:** embarrassing people lmaoooo

**Kenma:** WHO LITERALLY FELL ASLEEP RIGHT WHEN THEY WERE GONNA FUCK

**Sugawara:** EMBARRASSING PEOPLE HAAH

**Tsukishima:** So, we all agree that he’s embarrassing?

**Kageyama:** Sorry hinata, but yes

**-**

**Tanaka:** um

**Tanaka:** UM I JUST GOT BACK

**Nishinoya:** From where?

**Tanaka:** I was out with Kiyoko

**Sugawara:** Aw, I visited her last weekend and i miss her so much

**Tanaka:** Like a DATE LIKE A DATE

**Tanaka:** LIKE WHAT

**Nishinoya:** WHAT

**Asahi:** WHAT

**Daichi:** WHAT

**Kuroo:** Kiyoko?

**Iwaizumi:** She was their manager

**Kuroo:** The one TORA WAS OBSESSED WITH HHAHAHA

**Kenma:** Scary times

**Tanaka:** Like I didn’t know it was a date 

**Tanaka:** But I was hoping it was

**Tanaka:** So after we parted ways

**Tanaka:** She texted me and said she hopes we can go on another date and

**Tanaka:** I THREW MY PHONE BECAUSE OMG OKMG

**Tanaka:** THIS IS HAPPENING

**Tanaka:** TJE MOMENT IVEDRE AMT OF

**Nishinoya:** NICE NICE NICE OMG GET MARRIED

**Sugawara:** Go on a second date first?

**Nishinoya:** GET MARRIED GET MARRIED

**Tanaka:** WHAT IF SHE’S PLAYING A PRANK ON ME?

**Sugawara:** She wouldn’t

**Tanaka:** What if she stands me up on the second date and I sit there crying alone

**Daichi:** Then you go home? And cry there?

**Tanaka:** What if she just calls hanging out “dates” and I got everything completely wrong

**Asahi:** I don’t think that’s what happened

**Tanaka:** I’M SCARED EW EW HOW DO PEOPLE GET GIRLFRIENDS WHY ARE GIRLS SO SCARY

**Kuroo:** They aren’t

**Kuroo:** You’re just being so weird right now

**Oikawa:** Remember when Hinata thought he was straight

**Kenma:** What an idiot

**Hinata:** WHY ME LET ME DIE


	59. my life but it's an episode

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: Kuro buy me dinner 
> 
> Kuroo: Okay
> 
> Kenma: Kuro buy me a coffee
> 
> Kuroo: Okay
> 
> Hinata: Why are you like that Kenma
> 
> Kenma: Kuro gives me whatever I want 🥰😼

_ BRB CRYING _

**Oikawa:** I just had the worst thing ever happen to me

**Oikawa:** Oh so no one is going to respond?

**Sugawara:** Everything that happens to you is the worst thing ever

**Kenma:** Yeah

**Oikawa:** No but like

**Oikawa:** Actual worst thing ever

**Oikawa:** SO NO ONE IS GOING TO ASK WHAT HAPPENED?

**Kageyama:** What happened?

**Oikawa:** Thank you, TOBIO

**Kageyama:** Idk why you had to capitalize my name like that but okay

**Hinata:** Tooru, why do you call him Tobio?

**Oikawa:** The same reason I call you Shouyou?

**Oikawa:** It’s literally his name??

**Hinata:** Yeah but I don’t even call him Tobio

**Oikawa:** Okay???

**Oikawa:** Go be weird somewhere else, Shouyou

**Oikawa:** I’m telling a story to my dear Tobio

**Hinata:** Do you mean my dear Tobio?

**Oikawa:** No. I don’t

**Kenma:** Shouyou why are you just okay with being so embarrassing all the time

**Oikawa:** Anyways

**Oikawa:** Worst thing ever just happened to me

**Oikawa:** So one of my friends

**Oikawa:** I’ll keep her anonymous for the sake of drama

**Sugawara:** Oh my god

**Oikawa:** JUST CALLED ME

**Oikawa:** AND GOES 

**Oikawa:** Hey Tooru. Settle an argument for me! 

**Oikawa:** Explained an argument she was ACTIVELY having with her boyfriend

**Oikawa:** And then I sat on the phone while they screamed at each other for twenty minutes ✨💖

**Kenma:** Ew wtf

**Oikawa:** YEAH

**Oikawa:** AND EVERYTIME I TRIED TO SAY SOMETHING SHE GOT MAD AT ME

**Kageyama:** Why didn’t you just hang up?

**Oikawa:** Because that’s so awkward

**Oikawa:** What if it made her mad at me?

**Oikawa:** What if she CALLED ME BACK

**Oikawa:** What if she CALLED BACK AND APOLOGIZED??

**Daichi:** You wouldn’t want her to apologize?

**Oikawa:** Honestly it was such an uncomfortable situation that I think I’d rather we never talk about it again 

**Oikawa:** So no

**Sugawara:** Did you cry?

**Sugawara:** I think I would have just started crying

**Oikawa:** Almost but for some reason my coping mechanism was to just start laughing

**Sugawara:** THAT’S SO AWKWARD

**Oikawa:** I KNOW. DON’T REMIND ME

**Kenma:** WHY DID SHE DO THAT TO YOU LMAO

**Oikawa:** IDK BUT I DON’T KNOW HOW I’M EVER GOING TO TALK TO HER AGAIN

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t be so dramatic

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan! 🥰 Did you like my story? 💖✨

**Iwaizumi:** No

**Oikawa:** Me neither!!!

**Hinata:** Tooru you’re weird

**Oikawa:** Coming from you

**Kenma:** Coming from you

**Sugawara:** Coming from you

**Hinata:** So I guess everyone hates me

**Kenma:** Yeah

-

**Hinata:** I want banana crocs

**Kenma:** What

**Hinata:** Banana

**Hinata:** Crocs

**Hinata:** Banana crocs banana crocs banana crocs

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** Banana crocs

**Kenma:** Banana crocs banana crocs banana crocs

**Kenma:** Kuro I want banana crocs

**Kuroo:** I’ll buy you some

**Kenma:** OMG REALLY

**Hinata:** THIS ISN’T FAIR

**Oikawa:** Just ask Tobio to buy u a pair

**Nishinoya:** Sugar daddy Kageyama tingz

**Sugawara:** Yesss

**Hinata:** Don’t call him that

**Hinata:** And no! I don’t want him to feel like he has to buy me things. That’s not fair to him

**Kenma:** Kuro buy me dinner 

**Kuroo:** Okay

**Kenma:** Kuro buy me a coffee

**Kuroo:** Okay

**Hinata:** Why are you like that Kenma

**Kenma:** Kuro gives me whatever I want 🥰😼

**Sugawara:** Spoiled ass bitch

**Kenma:** Yeah

**Kuroo:** It’s bc he literally spends so much money on me all the time

**Kuroo:** For no reason

**Kuroo:** It’s scary

**Kenma:** I like to buy things for you when I’m sad

**Kenma:** It makes me feel better

**Kenma:** And you always look really cute when I give you them

**Kenma:** Your smile makes my heart go 💕💞💓 💗💖💘

**Sugawara:** Awww

**Oikawa:** Kenma stop being cute

**Oikawa:** It’s making me sick

**Kenma:** Stupid idiot

**Oikawa:** Idiot asshole

**Kenma:** Idiot asshole bitch

**Oikawa:** Idiot asshole stupid bitch

**Akaashi:** Stop

-

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** Kageyama bought me

**Hinata:** Banana crocs

**Hinata:** banana crocs banana crocs

**Kageyama:** Shut up

**Hinata:** YOU shut up

**Kageyama:** Stop, idiot. You shut up

**Hinata:** Stupid. 

**Kageyama:** Idiot

**Hinata:** ❤️

**Kageyama: ❤️**

**Oikawa:** I don’t know what any of that meant

**-**

**Hinata:** I’m on facetime with Kenma

**Hinata:** And he just fell asleep??

**Kuroo:** Aww I love when that happens

**Kuroo:** Doesn’t he look so cute

**Hinata:** I guess but like

**Hinata:** What do I do ???

**Oikawa:** What do you mean

**Sugawara:** Literally 

**Hinata:** Like ??? He fell asleep what do I do???

**Daichi:** You hang up

**Hinata:** Oh yeah

**Hinata:** WHY DID I FORGOT I COULD DO THAT

**Sugawara:** AHAHAH IDIOT WTF

**Oikawa:** Shouyou you really amaze me sometimes

**Hinata:** SHUT UP


	60. Two of these things have existed for me. The third is just a dumb idea. Anyways. I MISS YOU DUMB IDIOT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nishinoya: bullies everywhere  
> Nishinoya: If you want me gone, just be honest with me  
> Tanaka: Drama queen  
> Nishinoya: Queen shit😤😤🤪💋🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻👑✨✨✨

_ BRB CRYING _

**Sugawara:** Look look!!

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** Shes CUTE

**Kenma:** SHES SO CUTE SHES SO CUTE

**Kageyama:** What is that?

**Sugawara:** My Apple Pencil

**Sugawara:** Isn’t the skin so cute?

**Kageyama:** She's so cute

**Oikawa:** Is she a radish?

**Sugawara:** YES 

**Oikawa:** SO CUTE SHES SO CUTE

**Daichi:** lol, glad you like it

**Sugawara:** I DONT LIKE HER I LOVE HER DAICHI THANK YOU SO MUCH

**Kuroo:** When did you get an iPad?

**Sugawara:** just the other day! Wanna see what I’ve drawn so far?

**Kuroo:** Yes

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Oikawa:** SUGA HAHAHHA

**Akaashi:** Omg is that animal crossing Alexander Hamilton

**Bokuto:** HAHAHA WHAT A CROSSOVER HHA

**Iwaizumi:** This concept is 

**Kenma:** Scary?

**Iwaizumi:** So unexpected 

**Kuroo:** I want that

**Kuroo:** I WANT THAT

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Bokuto:** THEYRE SO CUTE IN ANIMAL CROSSING HAH

**Kageyama:** Angelicaaaaa

**Oikawa:** Eliiizaa

**Yamaguchi:** And Peggy

**Kuroo:** The Schuyler sisters

**Kageyama:** Angelica

**Yamaguchi:** Peggy

**Oikawa:** Eliza

**Kageyama:** WORK

**Kenma:** Wait wait they’re actually so cute

**Kenma:** HHAHA WHEN WORLDS COLLIDE

**Kenma:** SUGA IM LAUGHING YOU'RE A GENIUS

**Daichi:** That’s the first thing he drew lmao

**Sugawara:** It’s my passion

**Daichi:** you’re so cute

**Sugawara: 🥰**

**Akaashi:** Bad news

**Akaashi:** Suga, you’re making me want an iPad

**Bokuto:** I’LL BUY YOU ONE

**Akaashi:** Don’t 

**Bokuto:** I WILL

**Akaashi:** I’ll return it

**Bokuto:** DON’T

**Nishinoya:** I want an apple pencil

**Asahi:** you don’t draw

**Nishinoya:** I want it for my classes

**Asahi:** You don’t even take notes

**Nishinoya:** I JUST NEED ONE

**Tanaka:** NOYA YOU LOST YOUR AIRPODS YET YOU THINK YOU WONT LOSE A PENCIL AHAHAH

**Asahi:** lmaooooo

**Nishinoya:** bullies everywhere

**Nishinoya:** If you want me gone, just be honest with me

**Tanaka:** Drama queen

**Nishinoya:** Queen shit😤😤🤪💋🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍👑✨✨✨

**Tanaka:** We want you gone

**Nishinoya:** someone has gotten real cocky since they went out with Kiyoko

**Tanaka:** I think it’s reasonable LOOK AT HER

**Nishinoya:** I KNOW I KNOW IM SO PROUD OF YOU

**Tanaka:** THANKS BROSKI

**-**

**Oikawa:** My hair is ruined

**Kenma:** oh no

**Oikawa:** i would rather die than live like this

**Sugawara:** what did you do?

**Oikawa:** It’s horrible. 

**Oikawa:** So I have this like, after shower hair stuff. It’s in a purple bottle and it sits by my sink

**Oikawa:** Coincidentally right by this purple bottle of lotion

**Sugawara:** Oh no please say sike

**Oikawa:** I’m doing my routine. Singing and starting my hair proces

**Oikawa:** SO IM LIKE “hm this is awfully more fragrant than I remember” SO I SMELL MY HANDS THEN MY HAIR AND LOOK ON THE COUNTER TO SEE MY LOTION ON ITS SIDE AND OPENED

**Oikawa:** I COATED HALF OF MY HAIR IN FUCKING SCENTED LOTION

**Sugawara:** Oh noooooo :-(((

**Oikawa:** I HOPPED BACK IN THE SHOWER SO QUICK. I HAD TO REWASH MY HAIR AND FACE AND REDO MY WHOLE ROUTINE

**Oikawa:** I’m so scared. What if my hair is sooo dry tomorrow?

**Oikawa:** OR WHAT IF ITS GREASY

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN WILL BREAK UP WITH ME

**Iwaizumi:** I won’t lmao

**Iwaizumi:** And you should be fine as long as you washed it all out

**Kuroo:** OIKAWA YOU'RE AN IDIOTHAAHAH

**Oikawa:** It was so scary I cried a little

**Akaashi:** I’m sure your hair will be fine

**Akaashi:** Maybe move your lotion?

**Akaashi:** So you don’t make another dumb mistake

**Oikawa:** I want to cry again

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t pick on him too much

**Iwaizumi:** He’s vulnerable right now because of this crisis he’s having

**Kuroo:** HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN AHAHAH

**Kuroo:** WHY DO YOU HAVE SO MANY PURPLE ITEMS

**Oikawa:** I DONT KNOW IT JUST HAPPENED

**Kuroo:** STUPID YOURE STUPID

**Oikawa:** I’M CRYING

**-**

**Kageyama:** I am

**Kageyama:** 🙃

**Bokuto:** KING WHAT’S WRONG

**Hinata:** He’s being a freak

**Nishinoya:** LMAOO ITS USUALLY THE OTHER WAY AROUND

**Kageyama:** Natsu keeps talking about a boy in her class

**Hinata:** she has a little crush on him

**Hinata:** It’s so cute

**Kageyama:** It’s not but okay

**Hinata:** It’s cute Kageyama, accept it

**Kageyama:** Never

**Kuroo:** She’s gonna be our age one day

**Kageyama:** Nope

**Kenma:** she’ll have a significant other

**Kageyama:** Never

**Daichi:** She’ll get married one day

**Kageyama:** Absolutely not

**Kageyama:** I can’t accept that

**Sugawara:** Protective dad Kageyama

**Hinata:** you’re being so weird Kageyama

**Hinata:** It’s not like she’s starting a family tomorrow. 

**Hinata:** She just has a crush

**Hinata:** She’s getting older.

**Hinata:** What are you gonna do when she actually brings a guy home one day

**Kageyama:** Scare him away

**Hinata:** You will not

**Kageyama:** Beat the shit out of him?

**Hinata:** NO

**Kageyama:** Then idk?? Die, I guess

**Hinata:** lmaoooo you’re so stupid sometimes

**Kuroo:** lol this is so cute

**Kuroo:** Who let Kageyama be so cute

**Hinata:** Stop

**Kuroo:** 😘

**Hinata:** STOP


	61. Cabinet Battle #1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nishinoya: No blood just caffeine for Asahi
> 
> Sugawara: Please drink some water
> 
> Asahi: No water just caffeine for me
> 
> Sugawara: Also, make sure you’ve eaten something
> 
> Nishinoya: No food just caffeine for Asahi

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ Hello all _

**Sugawara:** I just took a million selfies

**Kuroo:** Why did you name the chat like an email

**Sugawara:** Because

**Daichi:** Send them to me

**Akaashi:** That’s awfully selfish of you Daichi

**Akaashi:** Send them all to the group chat

**Sugawara:** Okay I didn’t take a million

**Sugawara:** I took 3 and they are all ASS AND I WANTED TO POST ONE WITH YOUR HELP BUT THEY ALL SUCK 

**Oikawa:** Sounds like a lie lol

**Sugawara:** They literally look so bad

**Sugawara:** Daichi, you just allow me to be seen with you in public

**Daichi:** Suga stop :-((((

**Sugawara:** I’m fugly as fuck

**Tsukishima:** Fugly as fuck is a bit excessive don’t you think

**Sugawara:** No

**Kenma:** Send the selfies so we can hype you up!

**Sugawara:** No

**Kenma:** Send them

**Oikawa:** Send them

**Sugawara:** No

**Sugawara:** They have been deleted 😍

**Daichi:** Send me a selfie

**Daichi:** I miss your pretty face

**Sugawara:** Nooo

**Sugawara:** My outfit is terrible and doesn’t look good with my lipgloss 

**Tsukishima:** Why would your outfit matter? It’s so late right now

**Sugawara:** Because it’s a picture for Daichi

**Tsukishima:** Why do you have lipgloss on? It’s 1:30am

**Sugawara:** Why do you have so many stupid questions

**Tsukishima:** I think they’re reasonable

**Sugawara:** I think I’m ready to die

**Daichi:** HAHAH 

**Sugawara:** Anywhooooo

**Sugawara:** I’m gonna get ice cream rn

**Tsukishima:** At this hour?

**Sugawara:** Is it too late for ice cream?

**Tsukishima:** I think so

**Sugawara:** Well you’re wrong

**Tsukishima:** You’re being so mean to me for no reason? But that’s okay?

**Sugawara:** I’m literally nice you just have so many problems with my lifestyle

**Tsukishima:** Because your lifestyle scares me

**Daichi:** Can I go with you Suga?

**Daichi:** I can’t sleep lol

**Sugawara:** Yes! I was gonna invite you lol

**Daichi:** I’ll head over then

**-**

**Oikawa:** Hypothetically speaking

**Oikawa:** If someone is on a date and the waitress keeps FLIRTING with the guy they’re on a date with

**Oikawa:** How does one tell the waitress to leave them alone forever

**Sugawara:** Just make it obvious that it’s a date. Hold hands across the table or something like that

**Iwaizumi:** Get off your phone idiot we’re on a date

**Oikawa:** I’m sorry, I didn’t know this was a date because THE WAITRESS WAS FLIRTING WITH YOU

**Iwaizumi:** she’s gone now so get off your phone

**Oikawa:** I want to leave

**Iwaizumi:** This is your favorite restaurant 

**Oikawa:** Well suddenly I hate it

**Iwaizumi:** Stop

**Iwaizumi:** get off your phone

**Kenma:** Why are they like that

**Hinata:** Why doesn’t Oikawa just say he’s jealous? Like why is it always a whole scenario

**Sugawara:** Because he’s embarrassing

**Kenma:** nicely said

**Hinata:** When you guys just get jealous so easily

**Kageyama:** Remember when you didn’t want Oikawa to call me Tobio

**Hinata** left the chat

**-**

**Asahi:** I have been to Starbucks twice

**Asahi:** And I’m getting ready to go again

**Nishinoya:** 😎

**Nishinoya:** No blood just caffeine for Asahi

**Sugawara:** Please drink some water

**Asahi:** No water just caffeine for me

**Sugawara:** Also, make sure you’ve eaten something

**Nishinoya:** No food just caffeine for Asahi

**Sugawara:** I’ll get a pizza delivered to your place if you don’t eat

**Asahi:** DONT SUGA SAVE YOUR MONEY FOR YOURSELF

**Sugawara:** it’s just a pizza

**Asahi:** Pizza costs money

**Sugawara:** Well then, you two better eat something or I will order that pizza

**Asahi:** fine fine fine Noya we’re stopping at a convenience store before starbucks

**Nishinoya:** But my frap 😫😫😫

**Sugawara:** Your frap can wait

**Bokuto:** HAHAH YOU DRINK THOSE

**Bokuto:** if I get a frap I get the matcha one. But I usually just get iced coffee

**Akaashi:** a man🥰🥵🥵😳🥴🤤

**Bokuto:** AKAASHIII

**Nishinoya:** They’re good 😔

**Oikawa:** They aren’t

**Kageyama:** Hinata doesn’t even get those

**Hinata:** HAHAH

**Nishinoya:** I-

**Nishinoya:** You all are so MEAN

**Iwaizumi:** Mature*

**Kenma:** Do you like tea?

**Nishinoya:** Occasionally 

**Kenma:** Grow up 

**Kenma:** Asahi teach this boy to be a man

**Nishinoya:** IM THE MANLIEST ONE HERE

**Asahi:** Tanaka exists

**Tanaka:** Hey thanks

**Sugawara:** Asahi exists

**Tanaka:** DAICHI EXISTS

**Kuroo:** Kageyama exists

**Iwaizumi:** Bokuto exists

**Bokuto:** UM OKAY BUT YOU IWAIZUMI

**Kageyama:** Kuroo exists

**Nishinoya:** I am

**Nishinoya:** Being

**Nishinoya:** Bullied


	62. This but we're in love and 🤬😱😪 ships us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama: Haha
> 
> Oikawa: EXCUSE ME
> 
> Oikawa: I’M HURT
> 
> Oikawa: TOBIO THIS SHOULD BE YOU

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ MY LIFE SUCKS _

**Sugawara:** Yeah, we know

**Oikawa:** I just fell down the stairs

**Sugawara:** What 

**Sugawara:** How

**Oikawa:** IDK I WAS GOING DOWN THE STAIRS AND BLINKED AND THEN I WAS ON THE GROUND

**Oikawa:** My knee hurts 

**Iwaizumi:** Are you okay?

**Oikawa:** My knee is BLEEDING

**Kageyama:** Haha

**Oikawa:** EXCUSE ME

**Oikawa:** I’M HURT

**Oikawa:** TOBIO THIS SHOULD BE YOU

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan I’m out of bandaids and I’m suffering and so so sad 

**Oikawa:** And Tobio wants me to DIE

**Oikawa:** He wishes that I DIED when I fell down those stairs

**Sugawara:** Literally where did he say that

**Oikawa:** Read between the lines Suga.

**Iwaizumi:** I was already going to come over

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll be like fifteen minutes?

**Oikawa:** Get here in ten or you don’t love me

**Iwaizumi:** I’m fifteen minutes away

**Oikawa:** Get here in five minutes or you don’t love me

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll turn around and go home

**Oikawa:** You hate me

**Sugawara:** So Iwaizumi saying he’s going to just go home doesn’t ? scare you ?

**Oikawa:** No

**Sugawara:** Scary 😳 my bottom energy can’t relate

**Oikawa:** Glad we can all finally agree I’m a top 😙

**Kageyama:** Sure

**Oikawa:** EXCUSE ME???

**Iwaizumi:** You’re so annoying

**Oikawa:** You hate me

**Oikawa:** My knee is bleeding and NOW IT’S BRUISING

**Oikawa:** AND SO IS MY HAND WHAT

**Sugawara:** How fucking hard did you fall down those stairs?

**Oikawa:** Hard enough for me to understand that the universe really hates me

**Iwaizumi:** I can be at your place in like. 8 minutes.

**Oikawa:** What

**Oikawa:** How

**Iwaizumi:** Running

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan 🥺🥺

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up, idiot

**Kuroo:** Iwaizumi are you being bashful??

**Kuroo:** My heart just skipped a beat

**Kuroo:** My stomach is saying ✨🦋🦋🦋✨

**Kuroo:** And so is my you-know-what 😏

**Oikawa:** Shut up Kuroo

**Kenma:** Stop

**-**

**Kenma:** So uhhh

**Kenma:** Guess what?

**Sugawara:** Oh my god

**Sugawara:** Kenma do you have a story to tell us???

**Sugawara:** I’m so excited

**Kenma:** I’m not

**Kenma:** So I have a class with Inuoka right

**Oikawa:** Who

**Hinata:** omg I love him!!!!!!

**Kageyama:** Shut up   
**Hinata:** How’s he doing?!!!??!??!?!!?

**Kageyama:** Shut up

**Kenma:** He’s doing fine I guess

**Kenma:** Anyway we were leaving class together and I was going to walk over to Akaashi’s apartment because we’re hanging out today

**Akaashi:** heart eyes heart eyes 

**Kenma:** Heart eyes heart eyes heart eyes

**Akaashi:** Heart eyes heart eyes heart eyes heart eyes

**Daichi:** Stop

**Kenma:** So Inuoka asked me where I was going and I told him and the conversation got really weird and uncomfortable??

**Kuroo:** Wait, how? What happened?

**Nishinoya:** UMMM Protective Kuroo????

**Asahi:** Nice

**Tanaka:** Kuroo is about to make me act up 

**Kenma:** SO LIKE

**Kenma:** Inuoka is in love with me apparently

**Kuroo:** WHAT

**Kenma:** He was explaining that he was talking to one of his friends about being in love with me, and then said he couldn’t pursue me because i’m ‘emotionally unavailable’ and ‘homophobic to myself’ 

**Kuroo:** So like

**Kuroo:** Do I not exist to him??

**Kuroo:** EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE???

**Kuroo:** The homophobic one just makes me laugh

**Kuroo:** When he’s homophobic but sucks your dick all the time 🥰💖✨

**Sugawara:** AHAHA KUROO SHUT UP

**Daichi:** Is that all that happened??

**Kenma:** NO IT GOT WEIRDER

**Kuroo:** What?

**Kenma:** SO HE’S TALKING ABOUT HOW HE’S IN LOVE WITH ME AND WANTS TO KISS ME 

**Kuroo:** He said that to you?

**Kuroo:** I’ll literally kill him

**Kuroo:** I’m going to make him run extra laps 💖

**Sugawara:** Yes Kuroo! Love that! 💕

**Daichi:** Don’t encourage him

**Kenma:** And in the same breath he literally says “but ur in love with akaashi”

**Akaashi:** Wait, we're in love???

**Bokuto:** WHAT

**Kuroo:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN IS LAUGHING TOO AHAHA

**Oikawa:** Ew wait intermission

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** Look at his dimples rn

**Sugawara:** I DINDN’T KNOW IWAISZUMI HAD DIMPLES I’M GOING TO CRY

**Kuroo:** IWA-CHANNNN 💖

**Oikawa:** Don’t call him that

**Kenma:** Omg

**Kenma:** But yeah sooo

**Kenma:** I guess I’m in love with Akaashi

**Akaashi:** Omg hi lover ❤️

**Bokuto:** Stop

**Kenma:** Hi baby boy, how are you doing? 💖 I’ll be at your apartment soon 🥰

**Akaashi:** Thank god because I’ve just been missing you so much 💓

**Kuroo:** Stop

**Kuroo:** Inuoka pisses me off 

**Kuroo:** Kenma when we go to practice on Tuesday I’m literally going to kiss you in front of everyone for every set you spike

**Sugawara:** YESSS

**Tsukishima:** That seems a little excessive

**Akaashi:** Kenma I don’t like when Kuroo talks to you 😖 Just makes me crazy jealous haha

**Kenma:** That’s how I feel when Bokuto talks to you baby😳🥵

**Bokuto:** Stop

**Akaashi:** Baby just say the word and he’s gone 🤞💖 You’re the only one for me

**Kuroo:** Stop

**Bokuto:** Stop

**Kenma:** AHAHA I’M OUTSIDE

**Akaashi:** Finally 🥺 the bed has been so cold without you 💔

**Kenma:** I’ll come warm it up for you baby 🥰

**Kuroo:** I hate you guys

-

**Oikawa:** UM GUYS

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN IS MOVING IN WITH ME

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** YES

**Kuroo:** YES YES OMG

**Kenma:** Why?

**Oikawa:** What do you mean why?? Because he loves me, obviously

**Iwaizumi:** He’s getting too skinny

**Iwaizumi:** Apparently he has to have someone to take care of him at all times

**Iwaizumi:** I have to be there to make sure he eats because he’s an idiot

**Oikawa:** Sorry that I’m ugly

**Oikawa:** He’s already treating me like a burden 

**Oikawa:** You hate me

**Iwaizumi:** You’re an idiot

**Iwaizumi:** But you’re beautiful so stop it.

**Iwaizumi:** And I’m moving in with you because I’m in love with you but okay

**Oikawa:** Stop

**Oikawa:** Please

**Iwaizumi:** Why?

**Oikawa:** I’m embarrassed 

**Oikawa:** You never sweet talk me in the groupchat 😳

**Kenma:** Sweet talk wtf

**Iwaizumi:** That’s because you’re an idiot and never deserve it

**Oikawa:** YOU’RE SO MEAN

**Iwaizumi:** But we’re moving in together :-)

**Kageyama:** Awwww

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan come over after work I miss your grumpy face (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)

**Sugawara:** Oikawa you’re so needy

**Oikawa:** You would be too if you were dating my iwa-chan (´∀｀)♡

**Sugawara:** I won’t argue with that

**Daichi:** Excuse me

-

**Oikawa:** ????!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

**Oikawa:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   
**Oikawa:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Iwaizumi:** We get it. Stop

**Oikawa:** Noooo nooo you don’t

**Oikawa:** YOU DON’T GET IT AT ALL

**Kenma:** Literally what are you talking about?

**Kuroo:** Explain pls for the idiots in the chat 

**Kuroo:** It’s me. I’m the idiot ❤️

**Oikawa:** So I was talking about Terushima

**Kuroo:** Ew

**Akaashi:** Ew

**Oikawa:** And I mentioned VERY BRIEFLY 

**Oikawa:** That when I first met him I thought he was hot

**Hinata:** I mean...

**Kageyama:** What?

**Asahi:** Wut

**Oikawa:** AND I MET HIM BEFORE ME AND IWA-CHAN WERE DATING

**Oikawa:** So MAYBE i flirted with him JUST A BIT

**Oikawa:** AND USUALLY TALKING ABOUT STUFF LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF IWA-CHAN DOESN’T BOTHER HIM BECAUSE IT’S IN THE PAST

**Oikawa:** Even though he’s super jealous every other time

**Oikawa:** Which is FINE BECAUSE HE’S SEXY 

**Hinata:** Ew

**Oikawa:** But anyway I was telling him that I thought Terushima was hot because his tongue piercing

**Oikawa:** AND HE COMES HOME TODAY AND LIKE

**Oikawa:** HAJIME WOULD YOU CARE TO SHARE WITH THE GROUP WHAT YOU DID

**Iwaizumi:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** NO WAY 

**Kuroo:** IWAIZUMI YOU GOT A TONGUE PIERCING?!@?!?@#!@?#

**Kuroo:** Daichi I’m so sorry, idk how to tell you this but I found a NEW DADDY

**Sugawara:** Kuroo I’ll kill you 

**Nishinoya:** IWAIZUMI YOU LOOK SO 

**Nishinoya:** SO !@&I#!&@^

**Nishinoya:** HOT

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up

**Oikawa:** AND

**Oikawa:** He has a lisp. It’s so cute

**Oikawa:** BUT I ALSO WANT HIM TO FUCK ME

**Hinata:** UMMM ??? YOU DON’T HAVE TO SAY THAT

**Hinata:** WEIRDO

**Oikawa:** SHUT UP SHOUYOU

**Nishinoya:** HORNY OIKAWA HORNY OIKAWA

**Oikawa:** He won’t let me do anything because he can’t use his mouth for anything other than eating and drinking for a few days 😔

**Kuroo:** he can’t but u can ;;;;;;;;--))))))

**Oikawa:** BRB

**Nishinoya:** HORNY OIKAWA HORNY OIKAWA

**Kuroo:** YESSS


	63. None of this means anything it’s just here and existing. Pretty sure you can tell where I projected anywho....

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: This energy╰(*´︶`*)╯♡  
> Oikawa: Iwa-channn  
> Iwaizumi: I’m blocking your number

_ MY LIFE SUCKS _

**Kenma:** Good morning

**Oikawa:** It’s four in the afternoon

**Kenma:** How did everyone sleep?

**Kenma:** Just woke up to like 27 minutes of snapchats from Kuro singing Hamilton songs

**Sugawara:** Did you screen record it?

**Kenma:** I’d be a fool not to.

**Hinata:** I just want to say

**Hinata:** it’s nearly dinner time and you just woke up

**Kenma:** I just want to say

**Kenma:** What a waste of time it was reading your message

**Hinata:** calm down

**Kenma:** I want Kuro

**Kageyama:** Where is Kuroo?

**Hinata:** Wouldn’t you like to know

**Kageyama:** ????

**Kenma:** idk

**Kenma:** Why did I wake up so late 

**Kenma:** Disgusting

**Kenma:** I should just go back to sleep

**Kenma:** Forever

**Oikawa:** Actually

**Oikawa:** You should eat something since you’re up

**Kenma:** You make me sick

**Oikawa:** 😘

**Kenma:** 😘

**Kenma:** I want Kuro

**Kenma:** Kuroooooo

**Bokuto:** KURO IS HERE

**Bokuto:** HES NAPPING

**Kenma:** WITHOUT ME

**Hinata:** THE DAY IS BASICALLY OVER KENMA OF COURSE HE’S NAPPING WITHOUT YOU

**Kenma:** what do you have against me?

**Kenma:** I’m here, heartbroken, and you’re being so rude

**Hinata:** I don’t like it here

**Kenma:** Good

**Bokuto:** WE WERE PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND HE WAS TIRED

**Akaashi:** Why are you just screaming in here

**Bokuto:** SORRY

**Bokuto:** Anyways, Kuroo sucks at Tetris

**Kenma:** He’s terrible at Tetris

**Sugawara:** I’m not😎

**Kenma:** Tetris is a mom skill

**Sugawara:** Wut

**Kageyama:** Mom

**Tsukishima:** Mom

**Yamaguchi:** Mom

**Tsukishima:** he’s my mom, that’s gross if he’s your mom too

**Yamaguchi:** mom in law*

**Sugawara:** That’s better

**Oikawa:** I’m the dad of the team

**Iwaizumi:** You’re the mom that can’t handle wine and forgets about personal space

**Oikawa:** were you just waiting for me to reply? That was so fast

**Iwaizumi:** You’re not the dad of the team

**Kageyama:** Iwaizumi is like

**Kageyama:** cool

**Kageyama:** So he should be the dad

**Oikawa:** ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH HIM OR SOMETHING

**Oikawa:** AM I NOT COOL

**Kageyama:** No

**Oikawa:** TOBIO

**Sugawara:** HHAHAHA 

**Kenma:** Kageyama, your brain is incredible

**Kenma:** Like how do you see that

**Kageyama:** Idk it just kinda makes sense to me

**Iwaizumi:** Imagine if like

**Iwaizumi:** Me and Kageyama dated

**Kageyama:** lmao that’s actually so funny

**Hinata:** Why would you want me to imagine that

**Oikawa:** Are you trying to make me vomit or cry?

**Oikawa:** I’m doing both

**Oikawa:** Throwback to when Kindaichi had a crush on Tobio

**Kageyama:** Ha

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** Lol that was kinda cute

**Iwaizumi:** It was in middle school

**Iwaizumi:** He denies it to this day but he told me that he had a crush on him

**Hinata:** Admitting you like Kageyama is so scary

**Kageyama:** What is that supposed to mean

**Hinata:** That you’re so scary and I wanted to cry when I found out I liked you

**Kenma:** I-

**Kenma:** Shouyou what

**Hinata:** Idk idk I thought he was gonna hit me or something

**Kageyama:** You’re stupid

**Hinata:** YOURE STUPID

**Kuroo:** he’s not stupid

**Kuroo:** Kenma IM HERE

**Kuroo:** IM ON MY WAY HOME

**Kenma:** Cool beans

**Kuroo:** THATS ALL YOU SAY

**Kuroo:** I THOUGHT YOU MISSED ME

**Kenma:** Hurry uppppppp and come over

**Hinata:** Anyways Kageyama is stupid and scary and Kindaichi is dead to me suddenly

**-**

**Akaashi** changed the group name to  _ My skin is horrible someone help please _

**Oikawa:** AH

**Akaashi:** RIGHT

**Oikawa:** OILY OR DRY SKIN

**Akaashi:** DRY

**Oikawa:** I’LL SEND YOU A SNAP OF THE STUFF I USE!!

**Akaashi:** THANK YOU MY SKIN IS IN SHAMBLES

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI IS YELLING HAHA

**Akaashi:** I’m not

**Bokuto:** YOU WERE HAHA

**Akaashi:** You’re just crazy

**Akaashi:** Bokuto, come to the store with me. 

**Bokuto:** OKAYYY 🥰

**Sugawara:** The way he just demands it

**Akaashi:** Why would he refuse? We’re in love

**Bokuto:** THAT AND I WANNA HOLD HIS HAND RN

**Oikawa:** This energy╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

**Oikawa:** Iwa-channn

**Iwaizumi:** I’m blocking your number

**Oikawa:** (⁎⁍̴̆Ɛ⁍̴̆⁎)

**Kageyama:** ew

**Oikawa:** TOBIO

**-**

**Sugawara:** I’m craving Daichi’s hands around my neck

**Hinata:** this is the groupchat

**Sugawara:** my bad 😋

**Sugawara:** Daichi I want you to fuck me

**Tsukishima:** Wow

**Daichi:** Suga I’m not even HOME

**Sugawara:** Well then, come home

**Nishinoya:** DAICHI GO HOME WHERE ARE YOU

**Daichi:** Camping

**Sugawara:** With the Michimiyas 🙃

**Oikawa:** DAICHI

**Daichi:** omg

**Oikawa:** If that girl likes you, you need to stop hanging around her so much

**Daichi:** she doesn’t like me

**Daichi:** We’ve been friends for way too long for her to like me

**Sugawara:** We’ve been friends for a long time too

**Sugawara:** AND WE’RE DATING

**Daichi:** It’s different 

**Oikawa:** How??!??

**Daichi:** I’m not in love with Yui?

**Oikawa:** you’re giving her false hope

**Daichi:** She doesn’t like me

**Sugawara:** She does

**Sugawara:** But whatever lol

**Sugawara:** I miss youuuuuuuuu

**Daichi:** I miss you moreeeeee

**Sugawara:** Not possible

**Daichi:** It is possible

**Yamaguchi:** Suga you were just horny what happened

**Nishinoya:** HORNY SUGA HORNY SUGA

**Daichi:** no

**Daichi:** No horny suga while I’m gone

**Sugawara: 🙃** well maybe next time you’ll tell her to fuck off🙃

**Daichi:** Suga

**Sugawara:** Daichi

**Daichi:** Suga

**Sugawara:** Daichi

**Daichi:** Suga

**Sugawara:** Daichi

**Daichi:** Suga

**Sugawara:** LMAOOO DAICHI STOP IM FALLING IN LOVE WITH YOU AGAIN

**Tsukishima** left the group

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI

**Sugawara:** Shhh

**Sugawara:** It’s simply natural selection 


	64. Also well i heard you got a special someone on the side burr. is that right? whWhat is this. It doesn't make sense. It's so stupid.at are you trying to hide burr? i should go no these guys should go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi: Idk do you ever have days where you’re just like
> 
> Yamaguchi: extra in love?
> 
> Kageyama: Yes

_ My skin is horrible someone help please _

**Akaashi:** _ attached image _

**Akaashi:** I did my makeup today

**Sugawara:** OMG AKAASHI YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL

**Sugawara:** ARE YOU WEARING LIPGLOSS ????????

**Akaashi:** Yes! Bokuto bought it for me yesterday

**Akaashi:** I thought it smelled good so he bought it to ‘make me smile’

**Akaashi:** He’s so cute.

**Oikawa:** CUTE CUTE CUTE

**Kenma:** AKAASHI I’M SO SO SO SO IN LOVE WITH YOU YOU’RE SO CUTE SO SO SO CUTE

**Akaashi:** Kenma Kenma Kenma ❤️

**Kenma:** Akaashi Akaashi Akaashi ❤️

**Oikawa:** I guess we all know who Akaashi’s favorite is

**Kenma:** Yes, it’s me :-) Go somewhere else to cry about it though, ok?

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHAH

**Bokuto:** WAIT THIS CONVERSATION IS MOVING ON WAY TOO QUICKLY

**Bokuto:** KEIJI YOU’RE SO BEAUTIFUL

**Bokuto:** YOU’RE SO BEAUTIFUL 

**Bokuto:** YOUR EYES LOOK BEAUTIFUL

**Bokuto:** YOUR LIPGLOSS 

**Bokuto:** YOU’RE SO BEAUTIFUL

**Akaashi:** Bokuto stop

**Bokuto:** OMG

**Bokuto:** AM I MAKING YOU BLUSH?

**Bokuto:** KEIJI KEIJI KEIJI

**Bokuto:** SEND A PIC PLS PLS 

**Akaashi:** No. Stop

**Sugawara:** Why not? I want to see you BLUSHING YOU’RE SO CUTE

**Daichi:** I’m beginning to think you’re in love with Akaashi, Suga

**Sugawara:** Good because I am!

**Akaashi:** Aww thanks Sugawara

**Sugawara:** CALL ME KOUSHI

**Oikawa:** AHAHAHA HE JUST SAYS THANKS

**Oikawa:** ALSO LOL SUGA I DON’T THINK BOKUTO WANTS A SELFIE

**Nishinoya:** AHAHAHA HE JUST WANTS NUDES IN THE GROUPCHAT 

**Bokuto:** NOT IN THE GROUPCHAT I JUST 

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI PLEASE

**Akaashi:** No. Stop 

**Bokuto:** PLEASE KEIJI

**Bokuto:** PLEASE

**Akaashi:** Stop

**Kenma:** Stop embarrassing him, Bokuto

**Bokuto:** 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

**Oikawa:** AHAHAHAHA

**Sugawara:** Daichi I want this energy ❤️

**Daichi:** Stop

**Sugawara:** You hate me

**Sugawara:** You don’t love me

**Daichi:** Stop

**Sugawara: 💔**

-

**Akaashi** and  **Bokuto**

**Akaashi:** _ attached image _

**Akaashi:** _ attached image _

**Akaashi:** _ attached image _

**Bokuto:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Bokuto:** YOU’RE SO BEAUTIFUL. THANK YOU THANK YOU

**Akaashi:** You’re welcome

**Akaashi:** Now please stop embarrassing me in the groupchat

**Bokuto:** Okay!!!!!! 

**Akaashi:** And come over?

**Bokuto:** OMW BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!!

-

**Kuroo:** GUYS GUESS WHAT

**Bokuto:** OMG OMG OMG

**Tsukishima:** Oh god

**Tsukishima:** What is it?

**Kuroo:** WHY ARE YOU REACTING LIKE IT’S SOMETHING HORRIBLE

**Kuroo:** I DISCOVERED SOMETHING AMAZING

**Kuroo:** IT’S INCREDIBLE

**Kuroo:** LITERALLY JUST FANTASTIC 

**Kenma:** Literally just say it, what’s wrong with you

**Kuroo:** (Wꀾꀄ)

**Kuroo:** It’s me

**Oikawa:** AHAHA IT IS

**Oikawa:** THE HAIR 

**Kenma:** Omg it’s so cute

**Kuroo:** Kenma you think I’m cute????? (W/ε＼*)

**Kenma:** Yes. Stupid.

**Kuroo:** (＠W▽＾＠)

**Kenma:** Omg stop. That one doesn’t even make sense, stupid idiot.

**Oikawa:** Stupid idiot

**Oikawa:** You sound like Shouyou and Tobio

**Kenma:** Ew why would you say that to me

**Hinata:** WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

**Kuroo:** KENMAAAA

**Kenma:** What

**Kuroo:** YOU’RE 

**Kuroo:** SO 

**Kuroo:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Kuroo:** I’M SO OBSESSED WITH YOU RIGHT NOW

**Oikawa:** He was literally just insulting you

**Iwaizumi:** You do the same thing.

**Oikawa:** Shut up Iwa-chan!!

**Kenma:** If you’re obsessed with me then come over 

**Kuroo:** OK. LET ME SHOWER

**Kenma:** No, shower over here, idiot.

**Kuroo:** Okay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA HE SAID NO

**Sugawara:** KENMA AHAHAHA

**Kuroo:** I’M OUTSIDE KENMA LET ME IN

**Kuroo:** I’M IN I’M IN

**Tsukishima:** Why do you always update us about that?

**Nishinoya:** BECAUSE WE WANT TO KNOW!!!

**Tsukishima:** No we don’t.

**Nishinoya:** KUROO FUCKS KUROO FUCKS

-

**Yamaguchi** changed the group name to  _ Omg _

**Kuroo:** Omg?

**Yamaguchi:** Guys

**Yamaguchi:** guys guys guys guys

**Yamaguchi:** _ attached image _

**Yamaguchi:** look at him!!!!

**Yamaguchi:** He’s just sleeping!!!! His face is so squished!!!!

**Yamaguchi:** He’s so cute!!!!!

**Hinata:** Ew

**Yamaguchi:** No stop!!!!!

**Yamaguchi:** He had a long day and he’s so tired and he’s sleeping on me and it’s so so cute!!!!

**Sugawara:** Yamaguchi what is this energy

**Sugawara:** It’s so cute but what

**Yamaguchi:** Idk do you ever have days where you’re just like

**Yamaguchi:** extra in love?

**Kageyama:** Yes

**Kageyama:** Also, Shouyou can I come over?

**Hinata:** YESSSS!!!!!!! You don’t even have to ask!!!!

**Yamaguchi:** WELL ANYWAY that’s how I feel right now!!!!!!!!!

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI TSUKKI TSUKKI

**Kuroo:** TSUKKI TSUKKI TSUKKI 

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI TSUKKI TSUKKI

**Kuroo:** TSUKKI TSUKKI TSUKKI

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI TSUKKI TSUKKI

**Kuroo:** TSUKKI TSUKKI TSUKKI

**Kenma:** Okay that’s enough

**Kuroo:** Oh hey Kenma 🥰❤️💕

**Sugawara:** Wow

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi why

**Tsukishima:** You’re so embarrassing

**Yamaguchi:** And you’re so cute!!!!!!!

**Tsukishima:** Stop.

**Tsukishima:** You’re the cute one

**Sugawara:** TSUKISHIMA AWWW

**Tsukishima:** Stop

-

**Oikawa:** Hey guys so I’m about to check myself into a mental hospital ❤️

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** Stop

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** Calm down he’s joking

**Oikawa:** No I’m not 💕

**Oikawa:** I’m going to fail my math test tomorrow

**Oikawa:** And I can’t fail this class

**Oikawa:** And I feel like I’m going to fucking throw up and I’m freaking out over it haha

**Oikawa:** Because I need this math class to graduate so if I fail it I can’t

**Oikawa:** And I’m goin gto fail it

**Oikawa:** And I found out the university will excuse me if I’m either in jail, dead, or in the hospital and I’m too beautiful to go to jail

**Oikawa:** And I mean I guess I could die but I think maybe Iwa-chan would be sad

**Iwaizumi:** You think maybe?

**Iwaizumi:** Stop overthinking this. You’re going to be fine, you’ve been studying all week

**Sugawara:** Hmm ok I get it!

**Sugawara:** I support you!

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t support him wtf

**Oikawa:** I’m going to do it 🥰

**Iwaizumi:** I’m coming home and I’m picking up sweets on the way

**Oikawa:** … What kind of sweets?

**Iwaizumi:** What kind of sweets do you want? I’ll go anywhere for you

**Oikawa:** Awww Iwa-chan I’m going to cry

**Oikawa:** I’M SO STRESSED OUT

**Oikawa:** LIKE I’M SO STRESSED OUT THAT I FEEL LIKE I’M GOING TO PASS OUT

**Oikawa:** AND YOU’RE THE BEST BOYFRIEND IN THE WORLD

**Oikawa:** I DON’T DESERVE YOU

**Iwaizumi:** Just shut up and call me, okay?

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan (●´□`)♡

**Iwaizumi:** Calllllll meeeee

**Oikawa:** Okay

**Kuroo:** So I just caught up in reading the chat and

**Kuroo:** Iwaizumi I think I’m in love with you

**Kenma:** Me too

**Sugawara:** Me too

**Kageyama:** Me too


	65. idk this isn't good but also head empty thoughts anthony ramos

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: Am I a joke to you Daichi?
> 
> Daichi: Yes

**Hinata** changed the group name to  _ where is tobio _

**Sugawara:** tobio

**Kenma:** Tobio

**Daichi:** Tobio

**Yamaguchi:** Tobio

**Akaashi:** Tobio

**Kuroo:** Tobio

**Oikawa:** TOBIO

**Hinata** changed the group name to  _ where is Kageyama _

**Sugawara:** Aww are you embarrassed?

**Hinata:** No. 

**Hinata:** Shut up

**Hinata:** Why would you even asj me that

**Kenma:** Asj

**Tsukishima:** asj

**Hinata:** WHY IS EVERYONE MAKING FUN OF ME TODAY

**Kenma:** Idk what you mean

**Kenma:** We make fun of you everyday 

**Hinata:** I’M NOT EVEN ACTIVE IN THIS CHAT EVERYDAY

**Kenma:** Yeah ❤️

**Hinata:** WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN TO ME

**Oikawa:** You’re an easy target

**Sugawara:** And you’re embarrassing

**Tsukishima:** And annoying

**Hinata:** STOP

**Hinata:** ALL I WANTED WAS MY BOYFRIEND TO TEXT ME BACK

**Sugawara:** Embarrassing

**Tsukishima:** Annoying

**Oikawa:** Easy target ❣️

**Kageyama:** Sorry, I was helping Atsumu with something

**Oikawa:** Oh. 

**Oikawa:** You’re hanging out with

**Oikawa:** Him?

**Oikawa:** Hm.

**Kageyama:** Stop

**Kageyama:** Shouyou do you want to go out to dinner tonight?

**Hinata:** Yes!!!!!!

**Asahi:** When they plan their dates in the groupchat 😍   
**Kenma:** Shouyou

**Sugawara:** Shouyou 

**Tanaka:** Shouyou

**Oikawa:** Atsumu 😡😡

**Kageyama:** Stop

**Kageyama:** You’re going to make Shouyou weird

**Hinata:** WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN

**Hinata:** HE’S NOT GOING TO MAKE ME WEIRD

**Kageyama:** YOU’RE BEING WEIRD RIGHT NOW

**Hinata:** NO I’M NOT

**Kageyama:** YES YOU ARE. IDIOT

**Hinata:** STUPID

**Sugawara:** STOP

**Sugawara:** Hinata I’m proud of you! Kageyama mentioned Miya and you didn’t even say anything!

**Daichi:** He’s working on his jealousy 

**Kenma:** HAHAHA

**Kenma:** How do you know?

**Daichi:** I’m his father

**Oikawa:** Am I a joke to you Daichi?

**Daichi:** Yes

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA

\--

**Kuroo:** Hello

**Kuroo:** My wonderful, wonderful friends

**Akaashi:** Please don’t include me in that

**Kuroo:** My wonderful, wonderful friends plus Akaashi

**Kuroo:** I’m craving something rn

**Oikawa:** Is it pizza????

**Oikawa:** Because I’ve been thinking about pizza for two hours but Iwa-chan is sleeping on me so I can’t move

**Kuroo:** It’s 3am

**Oikawa:** Okay and???

**Kuroo:** No. It’s not pizza

**Sugawara:** Ice cream!

**Kuroo:** No no no

**Kuroo:** I’m craving

**Kuroo:** Kenma in a skirt 

**Hinata:** Ew

**Sugawara:** Hinata, why are you still up?

**Hinata:** Uhhhhhmmmmm

**Hinata:** Tobio is over

**Sugawara:** OH

**Sugawara:** What’s up? What’s going on? What are you guys doing?

**Daichi:** Suga stop. Come back to sleep

**Sugawara:** No

**Kageyama:** Alexander come back to sleep

**Sugawara:** HAHA

**Daichi:** Koushi, come back to bed.

**Sugawara:** Yes daddy 😋😋

**Oikawa:** This conversation got ugly so fast

**Kuroo:** Kenma

**Kuroo:** Kenma that could be us

**Sugawara:** Does Kenma even own skirts?

**Kuroo:** I’m glad you asked

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** Omg

**Sugawara:** KENMA YOU LOOK SO CUTE

**Bokuto:** WAIT KENMA AND AKAASHI HAVE MATCHING SKIRTS

**Kuroo:** THAT’S CUTE

**Akaashi** has removed  **Kenma** from the chat

**Akaashi** left the chat

**Kuroo:** NOOOO

**Sugawara:** I see they still have to work on becoming proud skirt owners

**Sugawara:** Like me 😋

**Daichi:** Koushi I said to come to bed

**Sugawara:** Are you gonna yell at me? 😋😋

**Oikawa:** You’re literally so scary Suga

\--

**Sugawara:** I just found out

**Daichi:** Shut up??

**Sugawara:** That DAICHI

**Daichi:** SHUT UP

**Sugawara:** Has a FOLDER ON HIS PHONE

**Sugawara:** For my booty pics!!!!!

**Sugawara:** Specifically the booty pics i send him where he can see my mole??

**Oikawa:** The mole…… on ur … face….????????

**Oikawa:** Suga what

**Sugawara:** NO HAHA

**Sugawara:** I have one on my booty too 😋

**Kenma:** Why don’t you just say ass

**Hinata:** Or butt

**Kenma:** Butt is ugly

**Hinata:** You’re ugly

**Kenma:** No, you are. Ugly

**Oikawa:** Idk how to explain it but booty is a very sugawara word

**Sugawara:** I think so too!   
**Kuroo:** Don’t be shy Suga show us ur booty mole

**Oikawa:** BOOTY MOLE

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** 😋

**Kenma:** OMG YOU ACTUALLY SENT IT

**Kenma:** I JUST PEED EVERYWHERE

**Oikawa:** Omg

**Oikawa:** You guys are too comfortable in this groupchat

**Oikawa:** But also Iwa-chan I’m sorry I don’t have a cute freckled butt

**Kuroo:** Sorry his boring white cheeks are blinding you everytime you guys fuck ❤️

**Oikawa:** KUROO

**Iwaizumi:** Why are we talking about this

**Kageyama:** Umm can we change the topic

**Kageyama:** I don’t think I want to see Sugawara this way

**Hinata:** Don’t look wtf

**Kageyama:** Idiot I’m not! You don’t look

**Hinata:** Stupid I’m not!

**Daichi:** Suga!

**Sugawara:** Yes? 

**Daichi:** Stop sending things like that in the groupchat!

**Sugawara:** No. I like attention

**Oikawa:** HAHAHA

\--

**Kenma:** Just a reminder

**Kenma:** That I love

**Kenma:** Kuro

**Kenma:** So much

**Kenma:** And I hear you all thinking

**Kenma:** But Kenma you cannot love him he’s way too loud and annoying

**Kenma:** And yes. He is. 

**Kenma:** But he’s so quiet and cute with me

**Kenma:** _ attached video _

**Akaashi:** You could have just sent the video without hyping yourself up like that 

**Kenma:** No I couldn’t because that’s way too embarrassing

**Oikawa:** LMAO WHAT IS HE EVEN SAYING

**Oikawa:** I CAN’T HEAR HIM

**Oikawa:** WHY IS HE MUMBLING

**Kenma:** Stop!!!! That’s how he always talks to me!!!!

**Oikawa:** ANNOYING

**Kenma:** NOOOO

**Sugawara:** DAICHI LOOK AT THIS

**Daichi:** I’M LOOKING I’M LOOKING

**Sugawara:** Kenma I can’t breathe he’s so cute

**Sugawara:** He’s just ON THE COUCH

**Sugawara:** EXISTING

**Sugawara:** BEING SO CUTE

**Daichi:** When Kenma puts his legs on him!!

**Sugawara:** AND HE TURNS AWAY FROM THE TV AND SMILES AT HIM

**Sugawara: ‘** BABY DID YOU WANT SOMETHING?’

**Sugawara: ‘** COME HERE I WANT TO HOLD YOU’

**Oikawa:** wait that’s kinda cute 

**Daichi:** Kinda????

**Sugawara:** KINDA???

**Sugawara:** That smile is going to be in my dreams comforting me for the rest of my life 💗💓💕💕💖💘💝

**Daichi:** Suga don’t fall in love with my ex

**Sugawara:** Ok first of all

**Sugawara:** Why would you bring that up

**Sugawara:** Second of all

**Sugawara:** Too late!

**Sugawara:** Boy you got my helpless 🥺🥰💕

**Sugawara:** Finish the lyrics if ur in love with Kuroo 💞

**Bokuto:** Look into your eyes and the sky’s the limit I’m HELPLESS

**Kageyama:** Down for the count and I’m drowning in ‘em

**Oikawa:** Helpless!

**Hinata:** Kageyama WHAT

**Kageyama:** Don’t be weird

**Hinata:** You’re weird

**Hinata:** Kuroo has weird hair and you’re in love with him APPARENTLY

**Kenma:** You’re all ugly

**Kenma:** Especially you, Shouyou

**Kenma:** But

**Kenma:** He’s mine that boy is MINE 💘✨

**Kuroo:** KENMAAAAA

**Kuroo:** Come here I want to cuddle you! 

**Kenma:** Stop. You’re embarrassing

**Kuroo:** AHHH YOU’RE SO CUTE

**Kuroo:** Wait does this make me ALEXANDER

**Iwaizumi:** Why did you capitalize his name

**Kuroo:** Kenma 

**Kuroo:** I don’t have a dollar to my name

**Kuroo:** An acre of land a troop to command a dollop of fame blah blah blah blah

**Kenma:** idiot

**Kageyama:** How do you not know the easiest part

**Kuroo:** Whoops

**Kuroo:** Guess I was so focused on touching Kenma’s sweet thighs that I couldn’t remember 😼

**Oikawa:** Ugly bitch


	66. Life is a highway because this is episode 66 like route 66 omg flagstaff ew omg route 66 omgomg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akaashi: I have nothing prepared for death
> 
> Akaashi: No funeral playlist
> 
> Akaashi: No outfit
> 
> Akaashi: Ew ew I could have died
> 
> Akaashi: must be a hate crime

**Akaashi** changed the group name to  _ My Identity is Being Stolen Heart Eyes _

**Kenma:** Heart eyes

**Kuroo:** By who??

**Bokuto:** BY WHO?!

**Akaashi:** Inuoka?

**Akaashi:** I barely know him and he’s stealing my identity

**Kuroo:** How is that even a thing

**Kenma:** Idk but he’s starting to talk like Akaashi

**Kenma:** He sent me something and was like “Ew I’m gonna vom”

**Kenma:** He never says that

**Kenma:** Akaashi says that

**Kenma:** And then he was like “omgomgomg” 

**Kenma:** And just a bunch of other things that Akaashi says

**Akaashi:** He’s gonna murder me so he can take my place and get closer to Kenma heart eyes

**Kenma:** Heart eyes heart eyes

**Bokuto:** Not heart eyes

**Akaashi:** I’m so scared of Inuoka

**Akaashi:** How does he know I talk like that when I don’t even talk to him

**Akaashi:** Why is he in love with you so openly

**Akaashi:** He’s just allowed to exist so weirdly

**Bokuto:** HAAHA

**Akaashi:** I’m like weirdly uncomfortable 

**Akaashi:** Ew

**Akaashi:** Anyways

**Akaashi:** I redownloaded Love Live and I’m obsessed again

**Bokuto:** YES ITS STILL SO FUN

**Akaashi:** It really is

**Daichi:** You’re making me want to redownload it

**Daichi:** But I don’t have any space on my phone

**Kuroo:** You’re a grown man. How did you use it all??

**Daichi:** Not gonna say it’s because I have a million photos and videos of suga but that might be why

**Kuroo:** Makes sense

**Daichi:** Love Live takes a lot of space

**Sugawara:** You can download it on my phone! And you can play on there

**Daichi:** I LOVE YOU

**Sugawara:** Lmaooooo

**Oikawa:** You’re telling me that Suga doesn’t have that many pictures of Daichi?

**Sugawara:** I do but I buy more icloud storage 😎

**Oikawa:** Rich kid tingzzz ✨🥰

**Sugawara:** Yes sir

**Kenma:** You’re both scaring me right now

**Akaashi:** Inuoka is scaring me

**Akaashi:** ew ew ew 

**Akaashi:** Bokuto come hug me 

**Bokuto:** I can come over in like 30 minutes???

**Akaashi:** I guess that works…..

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI PLEASE

**Akaashi:** It’ll do

**Bokuto:** OKAY WAIT I MIGHT BE ABLE TO COME OVER IN LIKE 15

**Akaashi:** 🥰

**Sugawara:** What is he even doing that he was able to cut his time in half so quick

**Kuroo:** Probably working out

**Bokuto:** WORKING OUT

**Akaashi:** 🤤

**Oikawa:** I-

**-**

**Asahi:** Just found out that Noya doesn’t know how to fold clothes 🤢

**Nishinoya:** Just found out that Asahi wants to break up with me

**Sugawara:** Noya, didn’t I teach you how

**Nishinoya:** Yes but I FORGOT

**Asahi:** HOW 

**Asahi:** You’re an adult

**Nishinoya:** But putting everything on hangers is so much faster

**Asahi:** My boyfriend is SCARY

**Nishinoya:** Ex boyfriend because you just broke up with me

**Asahi:** I-

**Nishinoya:** YOU'RE NOT GONNA FIGHT FOR ME

**Asahi:** You’re so complicated

**Nishinoya:** I’M HEARTBROKEN

**-**

**Kageyama:** Hoshiumi is in town :-)

**Hinata:** Ew

**Kageyama:** Stop

**Hinata:** No

**Hinata:** He’s loud and annoying and his hair is so bright and he’s so short. He thinks he’s cool just because he plays volleyball

**Tsukishima:** You just described yourself

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Kageyama:** No Hoshiumi is fun

**Kageyama:** I was gonna see who wanted to go out with us 

**Hinata:** ME!

**Yamaguchi:** Me and Tsukki will go

**Tsukishima:** What

**Yamaguchi:** 🥺

**Tsukishima:** Whatever

**Nishinoya:** I wanna go!!!

**Kageyama:** Okay cool. We’re going tonight so I’ll text everyone the info. Just let me know if anyone else is in :-)

**Oikawa:** Why do you interact with so many people???

**Oikawa:** Like

**Oikawa:** You have a life outside of us

**Oikawa:** That makes me sick

**Kageyama:** What do you want me to say

**Iwaizumi:** He’s clearly jealous that you have friends other than us

**Oikawa:** NOT TRUE IWA-CHAN

**Iwaizumi:** You literally told me that you missed Tobio the other day

**Oikawa:** WHY MUST YOU OUT ME LIKE THIS

**Iwaizumi:** You deserve it

**Oikawa:** ＼＼\٩(๑`^´๑)۶//／／

**Kageyama:** I miss you too

**Oikawa:** EW NO DON’T SAY THAT

**Oikawa:** TOBIO YOU'RE UGLY

**-**

**Akaashi:** I almost got ✨hit by a car✨💗

**Akaashi** changed the group name to _I think you all take me for granted_

**Sugawara:** W8

**Sugawara:** Seriously?????

**Sugawara:** Are you okay???

**Akaashi:** Yes

**Akaashi:** I was walking across the street when it was clear but this big truck stops his car and reverses super fast and would’ve hit me if the worker that was conveniently next to me pulled me away.

**Akaashi:** I have nothing prepared for death

**Akaashi:** No funeral playlist

**Akaashi:** No outfit

**Akaashi:** Ew ew I could have died

**Akaashi:** must be a hate crime

**Akaashi:** Oh well I’m alive

**Sugawara:** Thank goodness

**Sugawara:** Why is your first thought death

**Akaashi:** Idk sounds easy

**Kuroo:** Dying is easy young man, living is harder

**Akaashi:** lol that was actually a good one

**Kuroo:** You’re a dead girl walking

**Akaashi:** Okay that’s enough

**Akaashi:** Anyways

**Akaashi:** I’m alive

**Akaashi:** So count your blessings I guess

**Akaashi:** Bokuto is kinda crying about it but he’ll stop soon

**Akaashi:** I’m gonna go hug him

**Akaashi:** Hopefully I don’t die

**Akaashi:** Haha

**Akaashi:** IM UNCOMFORTABLE I HAVE TO LEAVE

**Kuroo:** HAAHHA OMG

**Kuroo:** Akaashi

**Akaashi:** I have to leave

**Kuroo:** Akaashi

**Akaashi:** Look around look around at how lucky we are to be alive right now

**Akaashi:** Okay actually though I’m gonna hug my boyf

**Sugawara:** Is he okay??

**Oikawa:** NO AHAH WHAT


	67. when marshal calls me rutabaga and deirdra calls you gigajolt and they're ugly for that

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tendou: HEY OMG I’M BACK

_ I think you All take me for granted _

**Oikawa:** QUCK

**Oikawa:** QUICK

**Oikawa:** WHAT’S EVERYONE’S FAVORITE DESERTS

**Kageyama:** Mine is quck ❤️

**Oikawa:** Tobio I’ll kill you

**Hinata:** Mine is knowing how to spell desserts!

**Oikawa:** SHOUYOU DIE

**Kuroo:** Mine is Kenma!

**Oikawa:** NO

**Sugawara:** Daichi!

**Oikawa:** N O

**Akaashi:** Red velvet cake!

**Oikawa:** Yes!

**Oikawa:** Thank you

**Akaashi:** And Bokuto

**Oikawa:** I HATE ALL OF YOU

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** Stop

**Bokuto:** Come over!!

**Akaashi:** Okay. Stop texting me in the groupchat

**Bokuto:** Okay!!

**Kuroo:** Oikawa why are you asking for our favorite desserts? 

**Kuroo:** Also mine is vanilla ice cream

**Sugawara:** AHAHA WHAT 

**Sugawara:** Boring bitch

**Kuroo:** Excuse me

**Oikawa:** I can’t tell you guys! It’s a secret!

**Oikawa:** But also..

**Oikawa:** Are you guys busy on the 27th?

**Kageyama:** No

**Kenma:** No

**Daichi:** No. Why?

**Oikawa:** It’s Hanamaki’s birthday!

**Oikawa:** I’m throwing him a surprise party!

**Oikawa:** And I invited everyone who used to be on Seijoh and figured I’d invite you guys too

**Oikawa:** So I need to make everyone’s favorite things!!

**Kenma:** I love that it was a surprise and you weren’t supposed to tell us and then told us two messages later ❤️

**Oikawa:** Shut up kenma you know I can’t keep secrets!!

**Kenma:** Yeah because you’re stupid

**Oikawa: ⊙︿⊙**

-

**Kuroo:** So I had a thought

**Kuroo:** And it’s so scary!

**Oikawa:** What

**Kuroo:** AKAASHI

**Kuroo:** Did Inuoka take your hair?? Or like??? Anything of yours??

**Akaashi:** What? What kind of question is that?

**Kuroo:** What if he’s trying to like

**Kuroo:** PRACTICE DARK MAGIC ON YOU TO BECOME YOU

**Bokuto:** OH MY GOD

**Akaashi:** First of all why would you bring Inuoka up

**Akaashi:** I’m scared of him

**Akaashi:** Second of all

**Akaashi:** What even made you think of that

**Kuroo:** THINK ABOUT IT

**Akaashi:** I DON’T WANT TO THAT’S SCARY

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI 

**Bokuto:** DID HE TAKE ANYTHING?!??

**Akaashi:** I literally only met him a few times

**Kuroo:** AHHHHH

**Kenma:** Stop

**Bokuto:** AHHHHH

**Kenma:** INUOKA ISN’T GOING TO PRACTICE DARK MAGIC ON AKAASHI OMG

**Kuroo:** AHHHH

**Kenma:** IT’S 3AM GO TO SLEEP

**Kuroo:** AHHHHH

**Kenma:** Kuro, come to bed.

**Kuroo:** Yes sir 😳

**Sugawara:** You guys woke me up

**Sugawara:** AHAHA WAIT I JUST READ THE CHAT

**Sugawara:** You’re all IDIOTS

-

**Kuroo:** I’m craving something

**Kuroo:** Something…

**Kuroo:** Chaotic?

**Bokuto:** Omg you too??

**Sugawara:** Aren’t you always chaotic?

**Kuroo:** Idk what you mean

**Daichi:** Whatever it is. Stop

**Kuroo:** IDK WHAT YOU MEAN

**Kuroo** added  **Tendou** to the chat

**Tendou:** HEY OMG I’M BACK

**Tendou:** Omg Oikawa hey ❤️❤️

**Oikawa:** Ew. 

**Tendou:** Wait I have an idea

**Tendou** added  **Ushijima** to the chat

**Kuroo:** Omg Ushi say hiiii

**Kenma:** Ew, Kuro, don’t call him that

**Oikawa** has left the chat

**Hinata** has left the chat

**Kageyama** has left the chat

**Tendou:** Natural selection I guess

**Ushijima:** What is this

**Ushijima:** I don’t have any of these numbers saved 

**Kuroo:** Ushi 💔

**Ushijima:** ...What

**Akaashi:** Omg Kuroo why do you have his number if he doesn’t have yours?

**Kuroo:** Maybe we’re long lost lovers and he’s just forgotten about me 💔

**Kenma:** You’re definitely not.

**Kuroo:** Omg wait Kenma are you getting jealous over Ushi? ❤️

**Kenma:** Stop.

**Kuroo:** Don’t be jealous! Come here, I’ll kiss you 😋

**Sugawara:** Kuroo stop being ugly

**Sugawara:** Also that’s my emoji

**Tendou:** This groupchat is a lot more boring than I remember it being :(

**Bokuto:** HEY

**Tendou:** Maybe it’s because Oikawa is gone 

**Iwaizumi** removed  **Tendou** from the chat

**Kenma:** Doing God’s work everytime 

**Ushijima** has left the chat

**Sugawara:** LMAO

\--

**Kageyama:** Shouyou is so

**Sugawara:** Annoying? 

**Oikawa:** Embarrassing?

**Tsukishima:** Immature?

**Kageyama:** No!

**Kageyama:** I was going to say cute

**Sugawara:** Awww! He is!

**Hinata:** I’M NOT IMMATURE

**Tsukishima:** You’re an immature jealous embarrassing annoying idiot 

**Hinata:** UM??!!!

**Hinata** has added  **Miya Atsumu** to the chat

**Hinata:** Say hi to Atsumu! We’re friends now because I’m not an immature jealous embarrassing annoying idiot

**Atsumu:** AHAHAH

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** W H A T 

**Iwaizumi:** Omg

**Atsumu:** AHAHA OIKAWA???

**Atsumu:** OMG WAIT

**Atsumu:** HAJIME???

**Atsumu:** I MISS YOU COMING OVER FOR DINNER MAN HAHA

**Iwaizumi:** I haven’t done that in years

**Atsumu:** Yeah exactly!

**Oikawa:** EXCUSE ME

**Oikawa:** HAJIME

**Oikawa:** H A J I M E ?

**Iwaizumi:** Omg, stop

**Hinata:** Tooru be nice to him

**Oikawa:** HE DATED YOUR BOYFRIEND

**Kageyama:** Omg

**Atsumu:** For a whole two years 😍

**Sugawara:** Omg

**Hinata:** It’s fine!!!!!!!!!! WE’RE FRIENDS!!!!!

**Oikawa:** No

**Kenma:** Tooru you’re being

**Tsukishima:** an immature jealous embarrassing annoying idiot?

**Kenma:** I was going to say ugly as fuck

**Kenma:** But yes 

**Nishinoya:** Omg oikawa is the new Shouyou

**Atsumu:** Gasp

**Atsumu** changed  **Oikawa’s** name to  **Shouyou #2**

**Shouyou #2:** I’LL KILL YOU

**Atsumu:** (´∀｀)♡


	68. Why did this shitty episode take me five thousand days

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tanaka: Why do you have a cemetery?
> 
> Akaashi: 🥰

_ I think you All take me for granted _

**Oikawa:** If your significant other didn’t exist, who would you date from this chat?

**Iwaizumi:** Daichi 

**Oikawa:** WHT

**Oikawa:** YOU DIDNT EVEN HESITATE

**Kuroo:** Hajime doesn’t hesitate, he exibhits no restraint. He takes and he takes and he takes

**Kuroo:** I’d date Kageyama of course😘😘

**Kenma:** Akaashi or Sugawara

**Oikawa:** WHAT ABOUT ME

**Kenma:** No

**Sugawara:** Akaashi or Kenma😋😋

**Kenma:** 😚

**Akaashi: 😚** Kenma, Suga or 😍🤤🤤Kageyama 🤤🤤😍

**Yamaguchi:** Probably Asahi

**Oikawa:** Does no one like me???!!

**Daichi:** Iwaizumi

**Asahi:** Aw omg thanks 

**Asahi:** I've never thought of this

**Asahi:** Yamaguchi

**Oikawa:** I don’t think you realize how cute I am guys

**Nishinoya:** TANAKAAAAA

**Tanaka:** NOYAAAA

**Oikawa:** ʕʘ‿ʘʔ

**Tsukishima:** Ew idk I guess Tobio

**Hinata:** 🙃

**Oikawa:** HOW WOULD YOU CHOOSE TOBIO OVER ME

**Tsukishima:** No

**Oikawa:** WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO

**Tsukishima:** No

**Hinata:** I don’t want to pick

**Oikawa:** JUST PICK ME

**Oikawa:** choose me

**Oikawa:** love me

**Hinata:** No

**Kageyama:** I’ll date you, Oikawa

**Oikawa:** THANK YOU TOBIO

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Hinata:** WHY WOULD YOU PICK IF I DIDNT PICK

**Kageyama:** It’s just Oikawa

**Hinata:** JUST OIKAWA

**Oikawa:** JUST OIKAWA

**Sugawara:** no one here is ever satisfied

**Sugawara:** Kuroo don’t start

**Kuroo: 😿**

-

**Sugawara:** My dad is ☺️ visiting me 

**Daichi:** PAPAWARA

**Sugawara:** YES DAICHI

**Sugawara:** HE MISSES YOU SO MUCH

**Sugawara:** AND ASAHI

**Asahi:** :,-)

**Daichi:** PAPAWARA PAPAWARA

**Oikawa:** PAPAWARA IS SENDING ME

**Oikawa:** LIKE THAT IS ALL DAICHI HAS CONTRIBUTED

**Sugawara:** He loves my dad

**Sugawara:** They are broskis

**Sugawara:** It’s so CUTE

**Daichi:** PAPAWARA

**Daichi:** SUGA CAN I COME OVER

**Sugawara:** YES

**Sugawara:** ASAHI PLEASE COME OVER TOO

**Asahi:** Plans on the groupchat involving me

**Nishinoya:** EPIC

**Daichi:** I’LL BE OVER SOON. I JUST NEED TO DO SOME DISHES

**Sugawara:** 😚

**Daichi:** 😚

**-**

**Akaashi:** I have to DELETE ANIMAL CROSSING AND RESTART

**Sugawara:** Don’t

**Kenma:** That’s what I’ve been telling him

**Akaashi:** UGLY FUCKING ED SULLIED MY CUTE ISLAND

**Akaashi:** BLUE ASS UGLY IDIOT WITH BLONDE EMO BANGS 

**Akaashi:** STUPID COCKY BITCH

**Kenma:** He’s fugly but DO NOT RESTART

**Akaashi:** If I could set his house on fire I would

**Akaashi:** If I can make a landslide happen and only destroy his house I would

**Akaashi:** If I restart then that means I might not get Deirdre

**Akaashi:** I time skipped so far FOR NOTHING THE BITCH DIDNT WANT TO LEAVE I WAS ALMOST TWO YEARS AWAY FROM TODAY

**Bokuto:** Just shun him

**Bokuto:** Don’t look at him or talk to him Akaashi DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT HIM

**Bokuto:** Take Care of everyone else tho

**Oikawa:** I JUST LOOKED UP ED SO I CAN SEE HOW HE LOOKS AKAASHI NOOOOO

**Akaashi:** He looks like a twister mat

**Akaashi:** I want to stomp on him until he’s gone

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Akaashi:** Tsukki you don’t get it

**Akaashi:** MY ISLAND IS CALLED BADDIES FOR A REASON ED DOES NOT BELONG HERE

**Tsukishima:** I never knew Akaashi was one to judge based on appearance

**Akaashi:** he’s rude AND UGLY 

**Akaashi:** He needs to pick a struggle and pack his shit

**Sugawara:** Shunning takes a while but it works

**Sugawara:** I’ve done it because I only allow elite villagers on my island

**Akaashi:** I’m fencing off the bridge connecting him to the main part of the island

**Akaashi:** Good luck building relationships from all the way over there Ed

**Akaashi:** I hope he rots in his house

**Sugawara:** HHAHAHA OMG

**Akaashi:** I built his house right by the cemetery 🥰

**Tanaka:** Why do you have a cemetery?

**Akaashi: 🥰**

**Tsukishima:** What if you get an uglier one later?

**Tanaka:** Why do you have a cemetery?

**Akaashi:** why would you even SAY THAT TSUKKI

**Kenma:** WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT TSUKKI

**Tsukishima:** It’s something to think about

**Akaashi** changed the group name to  _ I’d rather DIE _

**Akaashi** left the group

**Bokuto** added  **Akaashi** to the group

**Bokuto:** AHHH AKAASHI COME BACK

**Tanaka:** BUT WHY DOES HE HAVE A CEMETERY???

**Akaashi:** I need to isolate Ed

**-**

**Hinata:** I cleaned my room

**Hinata:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** Oooh what’s the occasion

**Hinata:** Kageyama is coming over

**Oikawa:** 😳

**Sugawara:** 🤪

**Kenma:** 😝

**Kuroo: 😈**

**Nishinoya:** KAGEYAMA FUCKS PLEASE PLEASE?????

**Hinata** left the group

**Kenma** added  **Hinata** to group

**Kageyama** left the group

**Kenma** added  **Kageyama** to the group

**Hinata:** We’re gonna watch a movie actually

**Kenma:** I doubt it

**Nishinoya:** KAGEYAMA FUCKS IM MANIFESTING IT

**Nishinoya:** IM RANDONAUTING IT 

**Asahi:** NOYA 

**Sugawara:** NOYA HAHAHA

**Hinata:** No NO NO NO NO 

**Hinata:** Just a movie because Natsu will be there

**Nishinoya:** BOOOOOOO

**Nishinoya:** I’m gonna stay manifesting tho because the night is still young and Natsu might leave

**-**

**Kenma and Hinata**

**Hinata:** NATSU ISN’T COMING ANYMORE

**Kenma:** So?

**Hinata:** SHE ISN'T COMING ANYMORE

**Hinata:** SHE'S NOT SPENDING THE WEEKEND WITH ME AND KAGEYAMA

**Kenma:** And?

**Hinata:** WE’RE GONNA BE ALONE NOW ALL WEEKEND

**Kenma:** He’s your boyfriend, calm down

**Kenma:** Now get off your phone and talk to him idiot.

**Kenma:** And keep me updated 😎


	69. Eyyyyy 👅🥵

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akaashi: I think you guys scared Hinata and Kageyama
> 
> Akaashi: It’s been three days
> 
> Akaashi: And they haven’t said a word

_ I’d rather DIE _

**Kuroo:** GUYS SOMETHING BIG IS COMING!!!

**Kuroo:** IT’S SOMETHING AMAZING

**Kuroo:** LIKE SO SO SO AMAZING IT’LL BE THE HIGHLIGHT OF YOUR LIFE

**Kuroo:** IT’S SO GOOD 

**Sugawara:** What

**Oikawa:** What

**Asahi:** What

**Bokuto:** WHAT

**Akaashi:** oh em gee is he dropping an album? 😍

**Kenma:** I love that you think I’m dating someone who isn’t tone deaf ❤️

\--

**Oikawa:** Oh my god I’m about to lose it

**Oikawa:** Kuroo.

**Oikawa:** What are you doing?

**Oikawa:** What’s this amazing thing?

**Oikawa:** Can’t you just tell us?

**Oikawa:** It’s been two hours

**Oikawa:** I don’t want to go to bed until I know

**Oikawa:** PLEASE

**Iwaizumi:** Stop

**Iwaizumi:** Come to bed, stupid

**Nishinoya:** Kuroo isn’t here for this joke someone please fill his spot

**Kageyama:** Alexander come back to sleep

**Oikawa:** Tobio singing Hamilton always throws me off so much

**Kageyama:** I’m glad that I’m an enigma to you

**Oikawa:** HAHA YOU WISH

\--

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Akaashi:** WHAT

**Akaashi:** SHUT UP

**Akaashi:** KENMA I’M GOING TO KISS YOU

**Kenma:** Shut up or I’ll fall in love with you

**Sugawara:** I’M GOING TO DIE

**Sugawara:** KENMA YOU’RE SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** KENMA YOUR BLOND HAIR

**Sugawara:** KENMA IT’S PINK

**Kenma:** Thank you, I know

**Kuroo:** DOESN’T HE LOOK SO CUTE

**Oikawa:** I’M LITERALLY

**Oikawa:** SCREAMING KENMA IT LOOKS SO CUTE

**Oikawa:** SEND ANOTHER SELFIE

**Kenma:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** AHHHH

**Akaashi:** CUTE CUTE CUTE

**Kenma:** Stop stop stop

**Kenma:** Stop

**Kuroo:** Aww he’s embarrassed 

**Kenma:** Idiot. I’ll kill you

**Kuroo:** I look forward to it!!!!   
**Kenma:** What kind of response is that? Idiot

**Kuroo:** Stupid

**Kenma:** Stupid idiot

**Kuroo:** Dumb pink haired bitch

**Kenma:** Dumb it was your idea ass bitch

**Kuroo:** Yeah ❤️ Cute idiot 

**Kuroo:** I’m not calling you handsome in the groupchat idiot ❤️

**Tsukishima:** That was scary

**Sugawara:** I agree

**Sugawara:** And Hinata and Kageyama exist

**Hinata:** HEY

**Oikawa:** Shouyou, sit down. It’s true

**Hinata:** We don’t do it as much anymore

**Nishinoya:** Why is that?? Did you guys fuck? Is that why?

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Sugawara:** Omg tell us

**Kuroo: 🥵**

**Kageyama:** No, we didn’t

**Kenma:** Boring

**Kenma:** Kuroo come take a shower with me because we aren’t boring like stupid Shouyou and cute Kageyama

**Kageyama:** Thanks

**Hinata:** We aren’t boring!

**Sugawara:** Yes you are. Next

**Oikawa:** HAHAH

**Hinata:** HOW ARE WE BORING

**Sugawara:** You two have been DATING for almost a YEAR

**Sugawara:** YOU’RE ADULTS

**Sugawara:** AND YOU WON’T TALK ABOUT SEX

**Hinata:** We haven’t done anything!!!!!

**Sugawara:** WHY

**Hinata:** UM

**Kageyama:** Shouyou shut up

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Hinata:** Ugh

**Hinata:** Stupid Tobio

**Kageyama:** Idiot

**Daichi:** Stop

**Kageyama:** Sorry!!

\--

**Akaashi:** Hey guys.

**Akaashi:** I have a problem with all of you.

**Oikawa:** What

**Sugawara:** WHAT? I’M SORRY

**Kenma:** What tf are you talking about

**Kageyama:** Oh no :-(

**Akaashi:** So today I was minding my own business right

**Akaashi:** And Kenma snapchatted me and I went to open it

**Akaashi:** And BOOM my front camera is open

**Kenma:** This story better not be going where I think it’s going

**Akaashi:** And I looked SO UGLY

**Akaashi:** So basically I don’t want to be friends with any of you anymore because I don’t need friends who won’t tell me that I’m walking around 24/7 looking like the bottom of a troll’s foot after he stepped in shit

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA SAME

**Bokuto:** AkaaAAAASHI STOP

**Bokuto:** CAN I COME OVER

**Akaashi:** No. I’m going to sleep.

**Kenma:** Stop being mad over something so stupid

**Akaashi:** I HAVE TO SEE MYSELF EVERYDAY

**Kenma:** I LOOK AT YOU ALL THE TIME

**Akaashi:** THAT DOESN’T MAKE ME FEEL BETTER??

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL

**Kenma:** YOU’RE SO PRETTY

**Oikawa:** BEAUTIFUL

**Sugawara:** YOU’RE SO BEAUTIFUL

**Kageyama:** Akaashi you’re very pretty

**Akaashi:** Ew guys stop

**Bokuto:** Akaashi can i PLEASE come over

**Bokuto:** I don’t like the thought of you being genuinely upset over something like this :-(

**Akaashi:** ...Okay

**Akaashi:** I’ll leave the door unlocked for you

**Bokuto:** 😙

**Akaashi:** 😙

**Sugawara:** STOP STEALING MY THING

**Bokuto:** 😙

**Akaashi:** 😙

**Sugawara:** AHHH

\--

**Hinata:** Hey I’m leaving Yamaguchi’s in a few minutes

**Hinata:** Do I need to go to the store before I come over or did you buy more condoms?

**Yamaguchi:** Omg lol

**Akaashi:** Oh dear

**Akaashi:** Group chat, Hinata

**Nishinoya:** WHHHHAAAAAATTTTTTT

**Sugawara:** Condoms???????????????

**Sugawara:** HELLO?

**Sugawara:** HINATA COME BACK

**Tsukishima:** Wow

**Kenma:** AHAHAHAH

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU YOU IDIOT

**Oikawa:** Omg

**Nishinoya:** OMG I MANIFESTED THIS

**Nishinoya:** I RANDONAUTED IT

**Nishinoya:** IT WORKED

**Sugawara:** OMG

\--

**Hinata and Kageyama**

**Hinata:** I’m so 

**Hinata:** Scared

**Hinata:** Help

**Kageyama:** How did you even send that to the groupchat?

**Hinata:** I DON’T KNOW

**Hinata:** I WASN’T PAYING ATTENTION

**Kageyama:** Idiot

**Hinata:** MY PHONE IS BLOWING UP

**Kageyama:** SO IS MINE IDIOT WE’RE LITERALLY IN THIS TOGETHER

**Hinata:** I’M SORRY

**Kageyama:** I feel like you’re crying

**Kageyama:** Omg

**Kageyama:** Just come over, I went to the store yesterday

**Kageyama:** And don’t cry over something that isn't even a big deal. Idiot

**Hinata:** I’M NOT CRYING

**Kageyama:** Whatever. 

**Kageyama:** Hurry up and get here

**Kageyama:** I’ll put on ur favorite movie and we can lay in my bed and watch it

**Hinata:** I love you

**Hinata:** Sorry I’m stupid

**Kageyama:** It’s not a big deal

**Kageyama:** I love you too

\--

_ I’d rather DIE _

**Akaashi:** I think you guys scared Hinata and Kageyama

**Akaashi:** It’s been three days

**Akaashi:** And they haven’t said a word

**Kenma:** AHAHAHA

**Kuroo:** It’s what they deserve

**Oikawa:** It’s not their fault they’re private about things!!

**Sugawara:** It’s what they deserve

**Hinata:** I’M NOT SCARED

**Kageyama:** IDIOT

**Sugawara:** OMG

**Nishinoya:** I can’t believe you guys have been fucking and you didn’t tell us

**Sugawara:** Kageyama, Daichi and I are your PARENTS

**Sugawara:** WE DESERVE TO KNOW

**Oikawa:** SUGA YOU’RE SCARY

**Kageyama:** It’s awkward to talk about

**Hinata:** And not a big deal

**Kageyama:** You guys always make it a big deal

**Hinata:** I’m embarrassed

**Kageyama:** Me too

**Oikawa:** Me too

**Akaashi:** Me too

**Kenma:** Me too

**Yamaguchi:** Me too

**Nishinoya:** It’s not a big deal at all Shouyou!! We all just joke and think it’s funny but if you two are actually uncomfortable talking about something like that just let us know! We don’t have to talk about anything if you don’t want to!

**Asahi:** Why does Hinata always activate your mom mode?

**Nishinoya:** BECAUSE I’M HIS MOTHER

**Oikawa:** EXCUSE ME????

**Oikawa:** I’M RIGHT HERE

**Nishinoya:** YOU’RE A JOKE

**Nishinoya:** I’M TAKING MY SON AND LEAVING

**Oikawa:** A JOKE?

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN ARE YOU HEARING THIS?

**Iwaizumi:** Omg

**Oikawa:** JUST OMG? THAT’S ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY

**Oikawa:** I’M BEING BULLIED

**Hinata:** These are BULLIES

**Kageyama:** These are high school fucking bullies   
**Oikawa:** What

**Kenma:** And they want to come at me saying I’m 29 fucking years old with how I’m acting?

**Bokuto:** Fuck you!

**Yamaguchi:** Almost all of you! Attacking me!

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Kenma:** Overwhelmed

**Akaashi:** Overworked

**Sugawara:** Overpaid

**Oikawa:** I’m on top of the world sittin’ pretty on a stack

**Hinata:** Tooru what

**Hinata:** How do you know that one but you don’t know the other

**Oikawa:** It’s because I’m ugly isn’t it?

**Oikawa:** AND SUDDENLY EVERYONE’S SILENT

**Oikawa:** Good to know you all think I’m hideous 

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up

**Iwaizumi:** Fucking idiot

**Oikawa:** Point the finger pull the trigger throw them off your trail you’ll get yours eventually😘

**Oikawa:** HAHA IWA-CHAN I CAN HEAR YOU LAUGHING IN YOUR ROOM

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ Gabbie Hanna stans UNITE _

**Kuroo:** 🥵

**\--**

**Daichi:** So I just got off of work and read the chat

**Daichi:** And why in the world are you all quoting Gabbie Hanna

**Nishinoya:** Sorry you don’t understand their humor ❤️ Asahi and I will be taking the kids because we’re obviously better suited to take care of them

**Sugawara:** NISHINOYA I’LL KILL YOU

**Nishinoya:** COME ON GUYS

**Nishinoya:** LET’S RIDE

**Kuroo:** HAMILTON

**Kageyama:** SIR

**Kuroo:** MEET ME INSIDE

**Daichi:** Son

**Kageyama:** Don’t call me son 💔

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA

\--

**Kenma:** So Akaashi smells like coconuts 

**Bokuto:** I know!!!!!! It’s my favorite thing!!!!!!

**Akaashi:** I… What

**Akaashi:** I do??

**Sugawara:** What

**Oikawa:** He does?

**Kenma:** Yes.

**Kenma:** And I was at the store with Kuroo 

**Kenma:** And I was smelling candles because I like to stress buy them

**Hinata:** Why do you stress buy candles?

**Kenma:** None of your business, idiot

**Hinata:** Stupid

**Kuroo:** He just says they smell good and then lights a million at the same time to lay in bed and listen to music

**Kenma:** Hey

**Kenma:** Stop

**Kenma:** Anyway I was at the store smelling candles and I found a coconut one and I was like hmm this smells so good

**Kenma:** And makes me really happy for some reason

**Kenma:** And I didn’t know why but I bought it anyways

**Kenma:** And I just now realized

**Kenma:** It reminds me of Akaashi

**Hinata:** That’s weird

**Kenma:** No it isn’t, idiot

**Oikawa:** That’s… kinda cute?

**Akaashi:** Kenma you’re a freak

**Akaashi:** But also kenma heart eyes heart eyes

**Kenma:** Akaashi heart eyes heart eyes

**Akaashi:** Kenma heart eyes heart eyes

**Kenma:** AKAASHI HEART EYES HEART EYES

**Kuroo:** Omg stop


	70. episode 70

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: Oh god Suga

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ I’m goals _

**Sugawara:** Next time you see me

**Sugawara:** I’ll be

**Sugawara: ✨** Skinty✨

**Kageyama:** That’s good? I think? 

**Daichi:** Oh god what are you doing

**Sugawara:** I am sitting in front of my toilet

**Sugawara:** I just

**Sugawara: ✨** Vommed all of my breakfast✨

**Sugawara:** Cute right?

**Kageyama:** No, not cute

**Daichi:** Are you okay?? I’ll come over before work

**Sugawara:** I’m fine I’m fine

**Sugawara:** Don’t worry, I just feel funky today

**Oikawa:** Funky

**Sugawara:** Okay you say pop a squat 

**Sugawara:** Next caller next caller

**Daichi:** Are you sure you’re okay?

**Sugawara:** Yes 😚

**Daichi: 😚**

-

**Sugawara:** Okay so I havent left the bathroom

**Sugawara:** I vommed

**Sugawara:** ✨Twice ✨

**Kageyama:** Are you okay???

**Tsukishima:** Do you need anything??

**Sugawara:** My sons 🥰

**Sugawara:** I think I vommed because I was watching conservative tiktoks

**Tsukishima:** Don’t watch them

**Sugawara:** No no I watch them to feel angry

**Sugawara:** Because I repress all my anger so sometimes I watch things that will make me mad to feel a rush

**Iwaizumi:** Suga are you okay?

**Sugawara:** Yes I just need water

**Iwaizumi:** How are you texting while throwing up??

**Sugawara:** I just need water

**-**

**Sugawara:** Maybe I’m oversharing

**Sugawara:** But maybe this is a cry for help so I’ll continue

**Sugawara:** I vommed my tea and then my water and idk what’s happening

**Sugawara:** Maybe I just need to rest because I do be

**Sugawara:** ✨nauseous✨

**Sugawara:** Is this what happens when I finally eat two meals a day?

**Sugawara:** Cute

**Daichi:** I might be able to leave work a little early

**Daichi:** I’ll come over

**Sugawara:** Thank you

**Oikawa:** Do you want one of us to bring you anything?? We aren’t that far

**Sugawara:** I’m just gonna nap till Daichi gets here

**Kuroo:** Suga I will RUN to you if you need something

**Sugawara:** Lolol no no no I’m fine I’m fine

-

**Daichi:** Update: He’s sorta fine?

**Daichi:** He was still sleeping when I got off so I had to crawl through his window

**Daichi:** But he doesn’t have a fever so that’s good

**Daichi:** And he’s eating some soup right now

**Daichi:** Oh update: He’s ✨vomming✨

**Yamaguchi:** I’m a little scared

**Daichi:** He has an appointment with his doctor tomorrow anyways so we’ll see what’s happening

**Oikawa:** Oh god Suga

-

**Sugawara:** I’m back

**Sugawara:** I think I vommed more yesterday then I did when I had the stomach flu

**Sugawara:** Anyways apparently there's a stomach thingy going around

**Sugawara:** and it chose me out of everyone 😍

**Sugawara:** It’s because I’m stupid

**Sugawara:** But anyways I’m fine. I can hold food but not much because literally yesterday was hell

**Sugawara:** And Daichi is here with me taking a nap because I’m needy when I’m sick and he’s exhausted

**Sugawara:** My life is an experiment 😝

**Akaashi:** I’m glad you’re okay

**Sugawara:** Thank you!

**Sugawara:** Thanks for all of your concern everyone

**Sugawara:** But Kuroo don’t even run here because I’ll kick your ass

**Kuroo:** LITERALLY WHY

**Kuroo:** All I do is care about you

**Sugawara:** Idk I just will

**Sugawara:** The offer was very sweet tho so thanks

**Kuroo: 😚**

**Sugawara:** You wish

**Kuroo:** 😿

**Sugawara:** I’m gonna nap because I’m tired

-

**Kuroo:** Okay so I was thinking

**Kuroo:** It’s 2020 and Tanaka is 

**Kuroo:** 🤢straight🤢

**Oikawa:** ewww imagine being 🤢straight🤢

**Tsukishima:** ew

**Tanaka:** What is happening

**Sugawara:** YOU’RE STRAIGHT??? 🤢🤢

**Kenma:** Yuck

**Akaashi:** Sounds gross as fuck

**Tanaka:** I have a whole girlfriend

**Tanaka:** You guys know this

**Tanaka:** Also I stay winning because men are disgusting and they suck

**Tanaka:** So think about that before you all attack me

**Tanaka:** Kiyoko washes her face and has more than one bottle in the shower 😍

**Asahi:** You don’t have hair

**Tanaka:** Why is everyone attacking me today I LOOK GOOD WITH A SHAVED HEAD 

**Yamaguchi:** I bet your girlfriend told you that

**Tanaka:** WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

**Tsukishima:** lol

**Tanaka:** Ur all just mad because you love gross men bye talk to me when you have taste

**Sugawara:** You can say all you want about men but don’t EVER say I don’t use proper skin care products

**Sugawara:** You’re acting brand new mr. 3 in 1

**Tanaka:** THAT WAS THE PAST ME

**Tanaka:** I’VE MATURED

**Tanaka:** I don’t need this

**Tanaka:** I’m leaving because I’m going on a date with my GIRLfriend

**Tanaka:** Have fun marrying a gross man losers 

**Akaashi:** Literally what was that

**Oikawa:** I don’t know what just came over all of us but I am terrified to say the least

-

**Tanaka:** I’m pretty sure it’s obvious but I want you guys to know that I was totally joking 

**Tanaka:** I mean guys are gross but I know you guys wash your face 😍


	71. My head is just hurting so bad and idk why I think I need coffee idk idk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nishinoya: ASAHI IM IN LOVE WITH YOU ACCEPT IT ALREADY
> 
> Asahi: You’re being so weird

_ I’m goals _

**Nishinoya:** I’m in

**Nishinoya:** IM IN LOVE

**Nishinoya:** SUGA IM IN LOVE

**Sugawara:** Cute

**Nishinoya:** Daichi IM IN LOVE

**Daichi:** I know

**Nishinoya:** TANAKA BROSKI IM IN LOVE

**Tanaka:** I KNOW THAT

**Nishinoya:** TSUKKI IM IN LOVE

**Tsukishima:** Don’t talk to me

**Nishinoya:** wow okay

**Nishinoya:** my momentum is ruined

**Nishinoya:** _ Attached image _

**Nishinoya:** IM GONNA DIE IM GONNA DIE HES SO CUTE

**Oikawa:** Asahi

**Oikawa:** is

**Oikawa:** THE LITTLE SPOON SHUT UP WHY WOULD YOU SEND THAT WHY WHY WHY

**Oikawa:** THATS TOO CUTE 

**Kenma:** OMG OMG OMG SHUT UP SHUT UP NOYA 

**Nishinoya:** I KNOW RIGHT HES SO CUTE

**Nishinoya:** IM SO IN LOVE WITH HIMMMMM

**Akaashi:** I’m in love with him

**Bokuto:** no please

**Nishinoya:** no IM IN LOVE WITH HIM

**Nishinoya:** I THINK HES WAKING UP I HAVE TO KISS HIM

**Akaashi:** I have to kiss him

**Bokuto:** Akaashi no please

**Akaashi:** I’m joking Bokuto

**Bokuto:** :-(

**Kuroo:** YOU MADE HIM SAD FIX IT FIX IT

**Akaashi:** Bokuto bring your dirty clothes over

**Akaashi:** I’m doing laundry

**Bokuto:** I’ll be right over

**Oikawa:** You do his laundry?

**Akaashi:** Yes

**Oikawa:** why??

**Akaashi:** Laundry is therapeutic ☺️

**Akaashi:** And I steal his clothes ☺️

**Asahi:** noya why would you send that picture

**Asahi:** That’s embarrassing 

**Nishinoya:** No it’s cute

**Oikawa:** ITS CUTE

**Kenma:** ITS CUTE

**Asahi:** It makes me want to die

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI IM IN LOVE WITH YOU ACCEPT IT ALREADY

**Asahi:** You’re being so weird

**Nishinoya:** IM NOT IM JUST IN LOVE

**Asahi:** We’re literally dating Noya

**Asahi:** you tell me you love me all the time

**Nishinoya:** Ohh I get it

**Nishinoya:** you’re ashamed of me 

**Asahi:** I never said that

**Nishinoya:** It was implied

**Asahi:** It really wasn’t

**Bokuto:** Akaashi I’m here

**Akaashi:** Okay!

**Nishinoya:** so just like that? We’re done?

**Asahi:** What

**Nishinoya:** I never thought you’d let me go so easily

**Asahi:** what

**Nishinoya:** JUST SAY YOU LOVE ME DAMMIT

**Asahi:** I love you

**Nishinoya:** Awww Asahi I love you more I’m so happy you’re being affectionate in the groupchat

**Tsukishima:** You sounds like Yamaguchi

**Yamaguchi:** i don’t know what you’re talking about

-

**Daichi:** Suga’s outfit

**Daichi:** SUGAS OUTFIT

**Akaashi:** omg what is it

**Sugawara:** Daichi you’re actually being embarrassing 

**Daichi:** Show them show them

**Sugawara:** I need to take a picture

**Daichi:** Nevermind I’ll send a picture because you’re gonna take too long

**Sugawara:** lmaoo okay

**Daichi:** _ Attached image _

**Daichi:** _ Attached image _

**Daichi:** look how cute

**Oikawa:** Suga FUCK IT UPP BABY BOY FUCK IT UP

**Yamaguchi:** You look so cute

**Oikawa:** THE PINK AND MINT STRIPED LONG SLEEVE

**Oikawa:** WITH A COLLAR

**Oikawa:** NOT TO MENTION CROPPED

**Oikawa:** BABY BOY FUCK IT UP

**Sugawara:** omg shut up lmaoo

**Kuroo:** THE BAGGY BROWN PANTS AND CROP TOP NOT TO MENTION THE NIKES BABY BOY FUCK IT UP

**Sugawara:** Shut up shut upppp

**Daichi:** SUGAAAAA THEY LOVE IT

**Sugawara:** shut up shut up shut up

**Akaashi:** I have those pants but in blue and now that I see this I kinda wish I bought the brown ones baby boy fuck it up 

**Iwaizumi:** It’s a cute outfit Suga

**Oikawa:** No iwa-Chan don’t look hes too cute

**Sugawara:** I’m so embarrassed

**Sugawara:** I’m changing

**Daichi:** Dont I’ll die if you change!!

**Sugawara:** Fine

**Nishinoya:** ew are you on a 🤢🤢🤢 date

**Sugawara:** We’re just going out. It’s not really a date

**Daichi:** Like we’re just getting lunch together

**Nishinoya:** Ew ew they’re on a date🤮🤮🤮

**Hinata:** ew gross🤢🤢 a date??🤮🤮🤮

**Nishinoya:** Ew what if they’re 🤢🤢🤢 boyfriends

**Sugawara:** I hate you both

**Sugawara:** Kageyama I do not approve of Hinata

**Kageyama:** Hes an idiot so it makes sense

**Hinata:** TOBIO

**Kenma:** TOBIO TOBIO

**Oikawa:** TOBIO TOBIO

**Tsukishima:** Tobio

**Hinata:** ew why did I say that

**Kageyama:** it’s my name stupid you can say it

**Hinata:** NO

**Tsukishima:** you’re still on that

**Hinata:** it’s embarrassing 

**Tsukishima:** It’s normal

**Tsukishima:** you’re embarrassing

**Hinata:** STOP

-

**Oikawa:** Hypothetically speaking

**Iwaizumi:** what is it this time

**Oikawa:** If a girl in your group texts you outside of the project groupchat

**Oikawa:** and asks if your boyfriend is single

**Oikawa:** like for example if someone came up to me and asked “You and Hajime are really close, is he seeing anyone?”

**Oikawa:** what would you tell her

**Oikawa:** Hypothetically that is teehee

**Sugawara:** You say “he’s not really looking for a relationship right now but I’ll let him know” and then you never talk to her after the project 😋

**Kuroo:** You say “you snooze you lose”

**Kenma:** You say “sorry bbg he’s taken 😏😏 by me”

**Iwaizumi:** You say what suga said because he’s the only reasonable one here

**Iwaizumi:** If you want you can tell her that we’re dating

**Iwaizumi:** So she doesn’t bother you again

**Oikawa:** omg wait why didn’t I think of that AHHAH 

**Oikawa:** oh yeah because this is a hypothetical situation and I haven’t been staring at the message in fear

**Iwaizumi:** Yeah hypothetical just like all the other ones

**Oikawa:** Okay update: she’s a fast texter

**Oikawa:** okay update again: she’s insisting I set you two up

**Sugawara:** Haha set

**Sugawara:** Cause you’re a setter 

**Asahi:** lol

**Oikawa:** Okay update: she thinks I’m joking because I told her we’re dating teehee

**Oikawa:** I’ll just die it’s okay it’s okay

**Iwaizumi:** Why is she annoying

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan dont be rude! She’s a delicate girl

**Oikawa:** A delicate girl who wants me dead ( ✌︎'ω')✌︎

**Oikawa:** Update: I told her I was just joking because my self esteem is damaged

**Sugawara:** NO IDIOT WHY

-

**Oikawa:** IM GONNA DIE IM GONNA DIE IWA-CHAN WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT

**Iwaizumi:** Sorry can’t text I’m walking back from campus

**Oikawa:** HAJIME I WANT TO DIE AND YOU JUST LEFT ME HERE

**Bokuto:** WHATS HAPPENING

**Oikawa:** OKAY SO I WAS WORKING WITH MY GROUP AND IWA-CHAN CAME IN TO DROP ME MY LAPTOP BECAUSE I LEFT HER ON THE CHARGER ON ACCIDENT

**Oikawa:** THEN HE KISSED ME 

**Oikawa:** IN FRONT OF EVERYONE

**Oikawa:** AND THEN LEFT

**Oikawa:** HAJIME I HAVE TO PRESENT IN FRONT OF THESE PEOPLE IN TWO DAYS

**Iwaizumi:** now they know we’re dating though

**Oikawa:** THATS NOT THE POINT

**Nishinoya:** He made a bold statement 😤😤

**Nishinoya:** Asahi where is that energy???

**Asahi:** stop that


	72. When I'm craving free for some reason. Head empty just Makoto and Haru

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima: I’m going to die
> 
> Tsukishima: You’re going to be gone for a week

_ I’m goals _

**Kageyama:** Hey guys!

**Kageyama:** I have a burning question

**Sugawara:** Ooooh sounds fun!!!

**Kuroo:** Anything for u!! Ask away king!!

**Oikawa:** Ew

**Daichi:** Yes?

**Kageyama:** (￣ε(#￣)

**Kageyama:** Do you think this looks like Shouyou?

**Kenma:** Yeah, actually, it kind of does

**Sugawara:** HAHA IT DOES

**Oikawa:** Ew I hate agreeing with Tobio

**Oikawa:** But it does

**Hinata:** It doesn’t.

**Kageyama:** Yes it does

**Hinata:** Stop

**Hinata:** It doesn’t. Idiots. 

**Hinata:** Tobio, pick up my facetime call :-(

**Kageyama:** Sorry, I’m taking a shower

**Hinata:** Yeah sooo pick up my facetime call :-)

**Nishinoya:** UM

**Nishinoya:** WOAH

**Sugawara:** OMG

**Oikawa:** Ew. 

**Tsukishima:** Wow

\--

**Kuroo:** The Kenma brain rot is crazy today guys

**Tsukishima:** What

**Tsukishima:** Brain rot? 

**Tsukishima:** You sound insane

**Sugawara:** What does that even mean?

**Kuroo:** Like my head is so empty 

**Kuroo:** And the only thing I’m thinking about is Kenma

**Kuroo:** ugh

**Kuroo:** Ugh ugh ugh

**Kuroo:** He ruined my life. He’s beautiful. Amazing

**Kuroo:** Omg he’s the only thing I want to think about for the rest of FOREVER

**Kuroo:** Like

**Kuroo:** Kenma in a crop top

**Kuroo:** Kenma in short shorts

**Kuroo:** Kenma sucking my dick

**Kuroo:** Kenma wearing panties

**Oikawa:** Um

**Kuroo:** Kenma wearing MAKEUP

**Kuroo:** Kenma existing

**Daichi:** We get it

**Kuroo:** Kenma wearing my hoodies

**Kuroo:** Kenma SLEEPING IN MY ARMS

**Oikawa:** Omg shut UP we get it

**Kuroo:** Kenma brain rot Kenma brain rot Kenma brain rot

**Kuroo:** SOMETIMES HE DOES THIS THING WHERE IF HE’S EATING FOOD AROUND ME AND I’M NOT EATING HE’LL LEAN OVER WITH HIS FOOD AND LIKE

**Kuroo:** GENTLY GRAB MY FAEC AND FEED HIS FOOD TO ME

**Kuroo:** IT SOUNDS WEIRD BUT IT’S CUTE HE’S JUST FEEDING ME

**Kuroo:** OMG KENMA TAKING CARE OF ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Akaashi:** faec

**Kuroo:** SORRY IT’S THE KENMA BRAIN ROT

**Daichi:** LITERALLY SHUT UP KUROO 

**Kuroo:** NO

**Kenma:** Oh my god wtf

**Kenma:** Sorry guys I was in the bath

**Kenma:** Kuro shut up, you’re being so embarrassing 

**Kuroo:** Kenma I’m obsessed with you rn can I please come over

**Kenma:** Omg 

**Kenma:** Yeah but can you bring me iced coffee

**Kenma:** Pls baby 🥺

**Kuroo:** YOU CALLED ME BABY IN THE CHAT I’M ASCENDING

**Oikawa:** YOU’RE SO SCARY AND ANNOYING

**Kuroo:** I’ll be at your place in 20 minutes!

**Daichi:** Thank God

**Daichi:** Maybe now he’ll shut up

**Sugawara:** I think it’s cute!

-

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Daichi:** KUROO STOP

**Kenma:** Omg

**Akaashi:** Kenma, you’re so cute!

**Akaashi:** I love your outfit today

**Oikawa:** Kenma you know how much I love you

**Oikawa:** But if you don’t take your boyfriend's phone away I might snap teehee <3

**Sugawara:** SCARY

\--

**Yamaguchi:** Guys look!

**Yamaguchi:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** OMG AWW

**Tsukishima:** Why would you send that?

**Tsukishima:** It’s so embarrassing

**Sugawara:** IT’S NOT EMBARRASSING 

**Sugawara:** IT’S CUTE

**Tsukishima:** It’s not.

**Sugawara:** YOU’RE JUST SLEEPING

**Sugawara:** AND HUGGING HIM

**Tsukishima:** Stop

**Yamaguchi:** HE’S SO CLINGY

**Yamaguchi:** I LOVE IT

**Yamaguchi:** I have to leave for a week to go see my aunt in america 

**Yamaguchi:** AND HE’S BEEN SPENDING TIME AT MY APARTMENT EVERYDAY 

**Yamaguchi:** HE’S NEVER LIKE THIS

**Tsukishima:** Shut up Tadashi

**Yamaguchi:** No! You’re so cute!

**Tsukishima:** You’re cuter

**Sugawara:** OMG CUTE

**Tsukishima:** I’m going to die

**Tsukishima:** You’re going to be gone for a week

**Yamaguchi:** It’s just a week

**Daichi:** It’s just a week

**Iwaizumi:** It’s just a week

**Tsukishima:** You all say that as if you’d be okay with your boyfriends leaving for a week

**Kuroo:** I can’t leave Kenma for that long

**Kuroo:** We would both literally die

**Tsukishima:** Yeah exactly

**Tsukishima:** Ugh

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi can I come over?

**Yamaguchi:** YES YES YES YES

**Kageyama:** Wow

\--

**Oikawa:** Iwaizumi and I broke up.

**Sugawara:** What

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Kuroo:** My heart just shattered what what why?

**Daichi:** Oh my god what? What happened?

**Daichi:** Are you okay?

**Kageyama:** What happened?

**Oikawa:** He betrayed me.

**Kuroo:** ?????!!!!!!!!

**Kuroo:** Did he CHEAT ON YOU??

**Iwaizumi:** OH MY GOD TOORU

**Iwaizumi:** NO I DIDN’T CHEAT ON HIM

**Iwaizumi:** YOU’RE RIDICULOUS

**Hinata:** What’s happening???

**Oikawa:** He’s out having lunch with Ushijima 💔

**Kenma:** TOORU I’M GOING TO KILL YOU

**Asahi:** I literally stopped breathing wtf

**Kenma:** I WAS SO UPSET

**Iwaizumi:** TOORU STOP BEING STUPID. WE’RE CATCHING UP

**Oikawa:** Why are you talking to me? We broke up

**Iwaizumi:** We literally didn’t

**Oikawa:** You can’t say no to me breaking up with you 💔

**Iwaizumi:** Yes I can.

**Iwaizumi:** You’re so fucking dramatic. I hate you so much

**Iwaizumi:** Ushijima is leaving soon to hang out with Tendou, so I’ll on my way home in a few minutes

**Oikawa:** Your stuff will be on the lawn 💔

**Iwaizumi:** We don’t have a fucking lawn

**Kuroo:** This conversation doesn’t feel real

**Kuroo:** Kenma I’m scared

**Kuroo:** Let me lay on you 

**Kuroo:** Play with my hair 🥺

**Kenma:** Okay

**Oikawa:** Oh Iwa-chan will you play with my hair when you get back（/｡＼)

**Iwaizumi:** You don’t even have to ask

**Akaashi:** You two are so strange


	73. Seven Pages of Random and Useless Hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: Also Kuroo
> 
> Sugawara: If you ever throw up in my kitchen again
> 
> Sugawara: You will be on the next train home🙂

_ Gabbie Hanna stans UNITE _

**Sugawara:** Yui Michimiya has the audacity

**Sugawara:** To CONFRONT ME

**Oikawa:** uh oh

**Oikawa:** What happened

**Sugawara:** SHE ASKED ME IF I WANT TO HANG OUT

**Oikawa:** Suga that’s not confrontation

**Oikawa:** That's just a kind offer

**Sugawara:** YOU DIDNT SEE THE LOOK SHE GAVE ME TOORU

**Oikawa:** I guess

**Sugawara:** WAIT OMG GIVE ME TWO SECONDS

**Oikawa:** Oh?

**Sugawara:** OKAY OIKAWA

**Sugawara:** are you free Saturday night?

**Oikawa:** Um

**Oikawa:** I am!

**Sugawara:** Perfect! 

**Sugawara:** You’re sleeping over at my place this weekend

**Oikawa:** Fun!

**Sugawara:** And we’re both gonna hang out with Yui

**Oikawa:** UM

**Sugawara:** Dont worry don’t worry I already asked and she said it’s fine

**Oikawa:** I don’t wanna I don’t wanna Suga why

**Sugawara:** I want you to come with me

**Sugawara:** We can use our bottom charm to figure out her weaknesses

**Sugawara:** We’ll make her feel comfortable like she’s one of us

**Sugawara:** Then we strike

**Sugawara:** And we watch her crumble in front of us

**Sugawara:** We ruin her

**Sugawara:** she’ll never even think of Daichi again

**Oikawa:** okay I have a couple things to say haha

**Oikawa:** 1\. BOTTOM CHARM SHUT UP 

**Oikawa:** 2\. Maybe calm down???

**Oikawa:** 3\. Where is this happening so I know what to wear

**Sugawara:** We’re just getting dinner. After we can drink at my place?

**Sugawara:** without Yui

**Sugawara:** We have to flex our superiority with our outfits because not only are we cuter but we also have a better sense of fashion

**Oikawa:** You’re being weirdly scary rn and I want Iwa-Chan to hold me

**Oikawa:** But he’s at work 

**Sugawara:** I'd invite more people but we can’t immediately intimidate her. She’ll know it’s on purpose

**Sugawara:** But if anyone else wants to spend the weekend at my place you’re more than welcome! I have one bed and one futon but we can make it work

**Kuroo:** ME

**Akaashi:** That works out great actually because I’m not free until like 5 on Saturday but I can catch a late train?

**Sugawara:** YES AKAASHI YAY 

**Kuroo:** Um wow what about me

**Sugawara:** You can come too. But the bottom energy will be overpowering

**Sugawara:** So it’s up to you

**Sugawara:** Also you’re not allowed in my bed

**Sugawara:** Anyone who has slept with my boyfriend at some point can not sleep in my bed 🙃

**Kuroo:** that was in the past

**Sugawara:** I said what I said

**Kuroo:** Fine

**Kuroo:** I wanna get drunk with you guys it seems fun

**Kuroo:** KENMA WE’RE GOING TO SUGAS

**Kenma:** yay

**Kenma:** Akaashi heart eyes suga heart eyes Oikawa heart eyes

**Bokuto:** AM I INVITED PLEASE

**Sugawara:** lol yes whoever wants to come is welcome just lmk 🥰

**-**

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ Lol _

**Oikawa:** Daichi

**Oikawa:** Daichi you’re dead ( ◠‿◠ )

**Iwaizumi:** oh the face

**Iwaizumi:** Daichi what did you do?

**Daichi:** Nothing?? I haven’t even seen Oikawa since he got here

**Oikawa:** I’m at dinner 

**Oikawa:** With Suga and Michimiya and

**Oikawa:** I’m in the bathroom

**Oikawa:** Michimiya is literally in love with you so stop hanging out with her alone ( ◠‿◠ )

**Oikawa:** I might have to murder you

**Oikawa:** Suga is so uncomfortable whenever she talks about you ( ◠‿◠ )

**Nishinoya:** murder him murder him

**Daichi:** NOYA

**Nishinoya:** It’s for Suga’s sake

**Oikawa:** Well I’m going back out teehee Iwa- Chan I miss you and I’ll see you when I get back （╹◡╹）♡

**Iwaizumi:** Miss you more 

**Daichi:** I thought she knew we were dating??? What do I do???

**Iwaizumi:** Make it more obvious idk TELL HER YOURE DATING SUGA

**Daichi:** Do I text her rn?

**Asahi:** No that’s so awkward for them because they’re at dinner

**Tanaka:** Wait until like she asks you to hang out or something then you gotta lay the truth on her. Gently though

**Tanaka:** I’m great with women so listen to me

**Asahi:** You’ve had one solid girlfriend

**Tanaka:** KIYOKO IS THE ONLY WOMAN THAT EXISTS YOU DONT UNDERSTAND ASAHI

**Daichi:** AHH SHE THINKS I LIKE GIRLS OMG IS THAT GONNA DAMAGE HER

**Daichi:** I mean I don’t dislike girls

**Daichi:** But also I’ve only ever really really liked Suga 

**Daichi:** AM I GONNA HURT HER FEELINGS

**Asahi:** I mean her feelings or Suga’s sooooo

**Asahi:** Also it’s better to just tell her you don’t like her

**Daichi:** okay okay you’re right

**Daichi:** okay okay

**-**

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** Notice who’s missing??

**Sugawara:** KAGEYAMA HINATA TSUKISHIMA AND YAMAGUCHI 

**Kageyama:** We’re FaceTiming Yamaguchi

**Sugawara:** we miss himmmm

**Kageyama:** Lol so does Kei

**Tsukishima:** Stop

**Tsukishima:** I don’t want to be around drunk Kuroo or Bokuto

**Yamaguchi:** Sounds scary

**Sugawara:** Daichi’s here daichi’s here daichi’s here

**Kuroo:** Daichi’s here Daichi’s here Daichi’s here

**Sugawara:** NO 

**Sugawara:** Daichi come kiss meee

**Kuroo:** Daichi come kiss ME

**Sugawara:** Daichi you’re dead if you kiss him

**Daichi:** I wouldn’t kiss him lol

**Sugawara:** THERES SO MANY OF US AND IM LIKE WEIRDLY NERVOUS I HAVE TO PUT MY PHONE AWAY 

**Sugawara:** GOODBYE FOR NOW

-

**Kuroo:** Bokuto is in such a bad mood this morning lol

**Bokuto:** IM NOT

**Daichi:** You literally are

**Hinata:** What happened to Bokuto

**Kuroo:** He’s upset because Akaashi was too busy cuddling with Oikawa and there was no room on Suga’s bed for him

**Sugawara:** Kenma, Oikawa, Akaashi and me are the priority so we slept on the bed

**Daichi:** _ Attached image _

**Daichi:** You guys looked so cute

**Sugawara:** Also Kuroo

**Sugawara:** If you ever throw up in my kitchen again

**Sugawara:** You will be on the next train home🙂

**Kuroo:** I SAID I WAS SORRY SUGA LOVE ME PLEASE

**Sugawara:** Never

**Daichi:** lmaooo

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!


	74. Whatever any of this means idk idk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Atsumu: throwback to when this group chat wasn’t muted ☺️
> 
> Atsumu: However I come back to see that my Tobio is gone
> 
> Hinata: My Tobio but whatever

_ Lol _

**Tanaka:** Okay guys I need advice

**Tanaka:** So I want to take Kiyoko on a really really good date soon

**Tanaka:** Like I want it to be special

**Nishinoya:** I’m listening!!!

**Tanaka:** I think I’m gonna get us promise rings

**Tanaka:** But every time I think about it I shit my pants because I’m nervous 😎

**Daichi:** Aw thats so cute

**Daichi:** Not the shit part but all the other stuff

**Nishinoya:** BRO MY EYES ARE WATERING RYUU IM SO HAPPY WHAT

**Nishinoya:** Wait NO IM CRYING

**Asahi:** Tanaka he’s actually crying

**Tanka:** Noya lmaoo bro please calm down

**Nishinoya:** I can’t I LITERALLY CANT MAN

**Nishinoya:** You’ve liked her for so long and like she’s your girlfriend now

**Nishinoya:** Like you guys are together and it’s everything I’ve ever wanted

**Tanaka:** Noya lol

**Nishinoya:** I’ll never stop crying. I’m gonna still be crying as I take my last breath 

**Nishinoya:** Asahi hold me I’m SHAKING

**Asahi:** okay okay okay

**Nishinoya:** Anyways continue Ryuu

**Tanaka:** So I want to have a day full of cute fun?

**Tanaka:** I’m thinking we’ll go to Disneyland?

**Tanaka:** I say I’m thinking but I already bought the tickets soooo

**Tanaka:** Do you think she’ll enjoy it

**Oikawa:** Ohhh Disney sounds so fun

**Sugawara:** She’s gonna love it!!

**Tanaka:** Okay thank god I was so scared that it wasn’t enough

**Nishinoya:** Literally just get married to her right now I’ll shit forever

**Nishinoya:** Please Ryuu please bro I’m BEGGING I WANT YOU GUYS TO BE HAPPY TOGETHER FOREVER

**Tanaka:** Noya you're a mess I’m in love with you 🥰

**Nishinoya:** No I’m in love with YOU

**-**

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI I SAID IT ALREADY BUT I’LL SAY IT IN THE GROUPCHAT HAPPY VALENTINES DAY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

**Akaashi:** Happy Valentines day Bokuto 💗

**Oikawa:** Aww

**Akaashi:** What’s everyone doing today?

**Sugawara:** Daichi 😍

**Kuroo:** Kenma 😍

**Tanaka:** Kiyoko 😍

**Sugawara:** Okay that is where I draw the line

**Sugawara:** don’t talk about the purest angel ever like that

**Tanaka:** “Purest Angel” HAHAHA 

**Tanaka:** That's so incorrect 

**Nishinoya:** I-

**Asahi:** ??? It’s somehow uncomfy when it’s about Kiyoko

**Tanaka:** 😿

**Sugawara:** Disgusting disgusting disgusting I’m gonna act like I never read that

**Tanaka:** So you can say THINGS LIKE THAT ABOUT DAICHI BUT I CANT SAY IT ABOUT KIYOKO

**Sugawara:** No because it’s scary when you do it 

**Sugawara:** Me and Daichi are making cookies together! What about you Akaashi?

**Akaashi:** I’m not too sure. Bokuto told me to come over later today but other than that he hasn’t given me any details

**Bokuto:** It’s a surprise

**Akaashi:** you’re so cute

**Hinata:** Kageyama came to my place this morning and gave me a bunch of gifts and he made me a cake! We’ve just been hanging out and cuddling all day

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan made me breakfast and then we went shopping together

**Oikawa:** We bought matching shirts and I literally want to wear them forever

**Sugawara:** pics pics pics

**Oikawa:** I’ll send it once we take one. It’s so cute

**Kuroo:** Me and kenma are gonna go have a nice dinner and then fuck 😎

**Kenma:** A classic Valentines day

**Kuroo:** Exactly

**Nishinoya:** NICE KUROOOO

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki bought me flowers and chocolate and watered all my plants for me and then we saw an early movie. He’s sleeping over tonight 🙈🥵🤤

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi why

**Nishinoya:** NICE TSUKKI

**Nishinoya:** Asahi gave me gifts and he’s just being so cute today. We’re having a Twilight marathon too 

**Oikawa:** Twilight wtf

**Nishinoya:** It’s funny trust me trust me trust me it’s peak comedy

**Akaashi:** Cute cute cute

-

**Akaashi:** _ Attached Image _

**Akaashi:** Update: He made me dinner and decorated his place in the cutest way ever

**Sugawara:** SHUT UP SHUT UP THATS CUTE

-

**Kageyama:** Hinata is so

**Kenma:** Scary?

**Oikawa:** Embarrassing?

**Sugawara:** Loud?

**Hinata:** Why does everyone here hate me???

**Kageyama:** No he’s so cute

**Kenma:** OH???

**Kageyama:** We were walking and it was pretty busy and he’s slow as fuck and can never keep up with me

**Hinata:** WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING

**Kageyama:** You walk so slow

**Kageyama:** I’m setting the scene stupid

**Hinata:** UM WOW OKAY

**Kageyama:** And because he’s slow as shit we kept getting separated so he like ran up to me and wrapped both his arms around my arm and like just

**Kageyama:** held onto it so tight so it didn’t happen again

**Kageyama:** Idk I’ve just been thinking about that for like an hour

**Kageyama:** He’s so cute

**Kenma:** I JUST PULLED EVERY PIECE OF HAIR OFF OF MY BODY ONE BY ONE

**Kenma:** I SHOULD HAVE BEEN THERE I WISH I SAW THAT

**Kenma:** THATS SO CUTE THATS SO CUTE

**Hinata:** Stop LITERALLY STOP KENMA YOU’RE INSANE

**Kenma:** I’M GONNA SELL MY IDENTITY AND START OVER SOMEWHERE FAR FROM HERE AND HOPEFULLY I’LL FORGET THAT I MISSED SEEING THAT

**Hinata:** KENMA SHUT UP 

**-**

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ IM DROOLING _

**Oikawa:** _ Attached image _

**Oikawa:** He’s real

**Oikawa:** My boyfriend is real 

**Oikawa:** He’s so real and so hot

**Sugawara:** 🥵 Iwaizumi fresh out of the shower

**Kuroo:** Head empty just Iwaizumi’s biceps

**Oikawa:** He’s just so

**Oikawa:** Attractive

**Oikawa:** And I just

**Oikawa:** Want him to cum on my face

**Nishinoya:** Oikawa 😳

**Nishinoya:** OIKAWA IS HORNY IN THE GROUP

**Nishinoya:** EVERYONE TAKE YOUR SCREENSHOTS THIS IS RARE

**Tanaka:** HORNY OIKAWA HORNY OIKAWA

**Tanaka:** IWAOI STANS WE ARE BEING FED TODAY

**Nishinoya:** WE ARE FEASTING

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Hinata:** I’m disgusted

**Oikawa:** Oh shut up you’ve told me what you and Tobio did

**Hinata:** Sounds fake because I don’t know what you’re talking about

**Oikawa:** Maybe I’ll remind you right here in the groupchat

**Hinata:** OIKAWA NO IM SORRY HORNY OIKAWA HORNY OIKAWA

**Nishinoya:** EXPOSE HIM

**Tanaka:** EXPOSE THE ORANGE FUCK

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** your fate is in MY hands Shouyou

**Hinata:** No it’s not!!!

**Hinata:** The other day I had Kageyama specifically cum on my tummy so I can watch him

**Tsukishima:** WOW

**Nishinoya:** NICE NICE NICE KAGEYAMA NICE HINATA NICE NICE AMAZING

**Kuroo:** Hinata really just said the reynolds pamphlet

**Kenma:** KURO SHUT UP HAHA I’M PEEING BECAUSE OF THIS

**Sugawara:** Daichi they’re so grown :’-)

**Daichi:** That’s all you’re gonna say??

**Sugawara:** What else should I say?

**Tanaka:** That Hinata wanted Kageyama to cum on his stomach like a toaster strudel

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Nishinoya:** RYUU I STOPPED BREATHING YESTERDAY

**Kenma:** Why did you say tummy when you’re talking about your boyfriend’s cum

**Hinata:** Because tummy is a cute word

**Yamaguchi:** Hinata what

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi we don’t need to be surrounded by people like this

**Kageyama** left the group

**Hinata:** He’s leaving me here to DIE

**Oikawa:** I gotta go!!! Iwa-chan is calling me 🥵

**Nishinoya:** I’M LIVING

**Nishinoya:** EVERYTHING ABOUT ME IS THRIVING

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Kageyama FUCKS and Iwaizumi FUCKS 😎😎 _

**-**

**Atsumu:** throwback to when this group chat wasn’t muted ☺️

**Atsumu:** However I come back to see that my Tobio is gone

**Hinata:** My Tobio but whatever

**Atsumu:** lol

**Atsumu** added  **Kageyama** to the chat

**Kageyama:** Atsumu is here?

**Atsumu:** I’ve been here but I forgot about it lol

**Kageyama:** Nice

**Kageyama** left the group

**Tsukishima** added  **Kageyama** to the group

**Kageyama:** Please

**Tsukishima:** No

**Atsumu:** Tobio I miss you

**Kageyama:** I miss you too

**Hinata:** Do you miss me???

**Kageyama:** Yes

**Kageyama:** You should come over

**Atsumu:** Omw omw

**Hinata:** NO OMW OMW OMW

**Asahi:** Plans 😍 in the groupchat 😍

**Nishinoya:** Let them be cute

**Nishinoya:** Also pay attention to me wtf

**Nishinoya:** Do you hate me or something?

**Nishinoya:** You should be kissing my forehead or something

**Asahi:** Lmaooo okay

**Asahi:** Carry on with your plans I guess

**Kageyama:** Kei is here Hinata

**Hinata:** Boo

**Tsukishima:** I was hanging out with him first so sorry I guess

**Kageyama:** We can all play smash bros :-)

**Akaashi:** I want to hug Kageyama so bad 

**Akaashi:** So so bad

**Kuroo:** Me too

**Hinata:** no

**Kuroo:** Hinata I’m a man in love please let me love him

**Hinata:** no

  
  



	75. I climbed 🧗 out of my 💆♂️ head and watched 👁 myself implode 🧠🎊 a thought ☕️ without a 🦗 body🧚 Ought🥺 to be 🌸 the shot💪 to take 🚪 a load 💃 off. My brain 🧠 is poisoned🍼 And I’m🙈 searching 🔭 for the antidote 🧪 But🐦 every 🤩 time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: You want to marry him? 🥺
> 
> Kuroo: I’ve wanted to marry him since we were kids!!!!!!
> 
> Kenma: Kuro shut up you’re being so embarrassing

**Asahi** changed the group name to  _ all of suzu’s kittens are gone :’-( _

**Kenma:** NOOOOOOOOO

**Kenma:** WHO’S GOING TO SEND ME PICTURES OF THEM NOW?

**Asahi:** I’m sorry!

**Asahi:** I can still send you some of Suzu!

**Kenma:** YESS SEND ME MORE OF SUZU

**Kenma:** PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

**Kuroo:** Omg! Teehee

**Kuroo:** Asahi let’s hang out!

**Asahi:** Omg yes Kuroo let’s hang out!

**Daichi:** what

**Sugawara:** what’s going on

**Hinata:** Why did Kuroo say teehee

**Oikawa:** I’m scared

**Kuroo:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** You two are the last people I would ever expect to hang out together.

**Oikawa:** You’re planning something

**Kuroo:** I’m not!

**Kenma:** I think he is

**Kenma:** He’s been nervous all week

**Kenma:** Kuro is really bad at keeping secrets from me

**Kuroo:** I’M NOT PLANNING SOMETHING STOP

**Asahi:** Yeah, we’re just best buddies!

**Kuroo:** The best ever

**Tsukishima:** Ew

**Daichi:** Gross

**Kuroo:** Whatever!! Asahi I’m driving to your place right now!!

**Kenma:** Right now??????

**Kenma:** But Kuro who’s going to cuddle me all day 🥺

**Kenma:** I didn’t plan my day around you being busy!!!

**Sugawara:** Kenma you are so clingy

**Kuroo:** Kenma I have to go! My best buddy is waiting!!

**Kenma:** You hate me

**Kageyama:** I have to leave

**Hinata:** Alexander

**Kuroo:** Look around look around at how lucky we are to be alive right now

**Kenma:** Helpless 😣

**Sugawara:** HAHA THE EMOJI

**Kenma:** Kuro at least come kiss my forehead before you leave me forever 💔

**Akaashi:** So dramatic

-

**Kenma:** SO KURO IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE

**Kenma:** REMEMBER A FEW HOURS AGO

**Kenma:** WHEN HE WAS RUDELY LEAVING ME FOR ASAHI

**Kenma:** _ attached image _

**Akaashi:** HE GOT YOU A KITTEN???!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?

**Asahi:** Yes!! Take care of him!!! I love him so much!!!

**Bokuto:** A KITTEN?!?!??!?!

**Kuroo:** I brought him home an hour ago

**Kuroo:** And Kenma is still crying

**Kuroo:** I can’t get him to calm down

**Kuroo:** He keeps trying to cuddle it

**Kenma:** DON’T CALL HIM IT KURO

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** Awwww Kenma you look like a mess <3

**Kenma:** SHUT UP

**Kenma:** I’M JUST SO HAPPY

**Hinata:** WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO NAME HIM??

**Kenma:** OMG OMG OMG IDK IDK IDK

**Kenma:** KURO 

**Kenma:** KURO COME HOME SO WE CAN NAME HIM

**Kuroo:** Kenma I literally just left for the store, we can name it when I get back.

**Kenma:** Kuro!

**Kuroo:** Kenma, just wait a little bit, okay?

**Kenma:** :-(

**Kuroo:** Kittennn

**Kenma:** Fine :-(

**Hinata:** That’s such a weird pet name

**Hinata:** Let’s unpack that

**Oikawa:** Unpack? What are you? A therapist?

**Kageyama:** Omg he just followed this tik toker who says that to literally everything

**Kageyama:** And now he says it all the time like he knows what it means

**Hinata:** Hey.

**Hinata:** Let’s unpack why you’re being so rude to me right now even though I have done nothing but give you kisses today.

**Kageyama:** No.

**Kenma:** You are so weird Shouyou.

**Kenma:** Idk why Kuro calls me kitten but it’s okay because it’s my favorite thing ever 

**Kenma:** It’s so cute

**Kenma:** And he sounds good saying it

**Sugawara:** Good as in sexy???

**Kenma:** … Yes

**Sugawara:** Lol

**Sugawara:** Let’s unpack why you think it’s sexy

**Akaashi:** Let’s unpack why you think it sounds good

**Tanaka:** Let’s unpack why Kuroo got you a kitten and then immediately went to the store

**Hinata:** I hate all of you

**Kageyama:** Should we unpack that too?

**Hinata:** Stupid Tobio

**Kageyama:** :-D

**Oikawa:** Ew

\--

**Kenma:** _ attached image _

**Kenma:** Look at him!!! He likes boxes!!!

**Kenma:** There are boxes everywhere and he just!! Was going crazy!!! And jumping in them!!

**Kenma:** We named him Ren!!

**Kenma:** Because Kuro said I couldn’t name him Kuro :-/

**Sugawara:** KENMA YOU’RE INSANE HAHA

**Kenma:** Hey

**Kenma:** Stop that

**Kenma:** But anyways!

**Kenma:** _ attached image _

**Kenma:** LOOK AT HIM SLEEPING NEXT TO KURO

**Kenma:** HE’S ALL CURLED UP NEXT TO HIM

**Kenma:** I’M GOING TO DIE EVERYWHERE

**Akaashi:** Everywhere?

**Kenma:** YES EVERYWHERE

**Kenma:** ASAHI ASAHI ASAHI

**Kenma:** THANK YOU

**Asahi:** Omg 

**Asahi:** This is so cute. You’re welcome! Ren will be so happy with you two!

**Kenma:** I’m going to cry

**Oikawa:** Interesting. Let’s unpack that!

**Hinata:** I HATE YOU ALL

-

**Akaashi:** Wait

**Akaashi:** This is literally a day late

**Akaashi:** But Kenma why are there boxes all over your apartment?

**Tanaka:** Oh yeah! I was going to ask about that 

**Kenma:** Oh

**Kenma:** Well

**Kenma:** You see

**Kuroo:** WE’RE MOVING IN TOGETHER

**Sugawara:** OMG OMG OMG OMG!??!?!?!?!

**Kenma:** Yes

**Kenma:** It’s nothing exciting, I’m just moving next door

**Oikawa:** OMG YESS IT’S SO NICE LIVING TOGETHER

**Oikawa:** I’M HAPPY FOR YOU GUYS

**Daichi:** Congrats and all but I’m surprised Kuroo wasn’t blowing up the chat about this

**Kenma:** Ahhh, he’s being shy about it

**Sugawara:** AWWW WHY

**Kuroo:** Idk it’s just!

**Kuroo:** It’s the first step for like everything!

**Kuroo:** I asked him to move in with me a few weeks ago and like

**Kuroo:** Idk! 

**Kuroo:** I want to get married and spend the rest of my life with him and wake up next to him everyday and have dinner with him every night and watch TV together and like

**Kuroo:** Him moving in with me is the first step to that and like it’s a big deal and like

**Kuroo:** IDK I LOVE HIM SO MUCH AND I’M OVERWHELMED AND NERVOUS

**Sugawara:** You want to marry him? 🥺

**Kuroo:** I’ve wanted to marry him since we were kids!!!!!!

**Kenma:** Kuro shut up you’re being so embarrassing

**Kuroo:** Suga asked!!!

**Sugawara:** IT’S SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** Omg

**Sugawara:** Kuroo Kenma

**Sugawara:** Kozume Tetsurou 

**Kenma:** EW SUGA SHUT UP

**Kenma:** I’M GOING TO DIE

**Kenma:** Kuro I want to marry you

**Kuroo:** I want to marry you too!!

**Kenma:** KURO I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU

**Kuroo:** I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU TOO

**Asahi:** Can’t you two do this somewhere else?

**Akaashi:** Seriously. It’s disgusting

**Sugawara:** NOOO STOP

**Sugawara:** IT’S BEAUTIFUL

\--

**Hinata:** THE CUTEST THING EVER JUST HAPPENED TO ME

**Oikawa:** Ew this is going to be about Tobio, I can just feel it

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up

**Sugawara:** What happened??

**Hinata:** So Natsu was going through her school stuff from a few years ago and reading them to me

**Kenma:** NATSU CAN READ?????

**Hinata:** She’s going to be 13 in a few months lol

**Oikawa:** SHE’S WHAT????

**Kenma:** WTF WTF WTF WTF

**Hinata:** YES I KNOW I KNOW

**Hinata:** ANYWAYS

**Hinata:** She was going through a daily journal they had to have in class, and they had to write about someone who inspired them

**Hinata:** AND SHE WROTE ABOUT ME????

**Kenma:** THAT’S SO CUTE THAT’S SO CUTE

**Oikawa:** I’M GOING TO CRY THAT’S SO CUTE

**Hinata:** YEAH

**Hinata:** She wouldn’t let me read it though. But she let Tobio read it with her

**Hinata:** and the only reason she let him read it was because she said that I inspired her and he was all like ‘me too’!!!!!!!!

**Kenma:** AHHHHHHHH

**Kenma:** I’M ABOUT TO DIE

**Kenma:** THAT’S CUTE

**Kageyama:** Omg stupid why are you telling them about this

**Hinata:** Because it’s cute!

**Hinata:** You’re so cute Tobio!

**Kageyama:** Shut up, I’m not.

**Kageyama:** Also, Shouyou, will you please spend the night at my place?

**Hinata:** You don’t even have to ask!!!!

**Oikawa:** Ew

**Kageyama:** Stop that

**Kageyama:** I love waking up next to him

**Sugawara:** I’M GOING TO DIE AW

**Sugawara:** DAICHI DAICHI DAICHI

**Daichi:** I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW

**Hinata:** TOBIO IS SUCH A GOOD CUDDLER 

**Oikawa:** Why are we talking about this?

**Hinata:** I’M IN LOVE WITH HIM

**Oikawa:** Yeah, I heard. Get better soon<3

**Iwaizumi:** STOP

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan don’t tell me to stop when you’re literally laughing right next to me!

**Hinata:** Tobio can I steal your old volleyball shirts again??

**Kageyama:** You don’t have to ask, idiot

**Sugawara:** Omg I’m going to vomit 

**Sugawara:** Daichi!!!!!!

**Sugawara:** Look at our son!!!!!!!

**Daichi:** 😭😭😭

\--

**Akaashi:** Guess who’s stupid!!!

**Akaashi:** Just kidding, it’s me!

**Akaashi:** So I was just cooking something, and I had to dump a little bit of boiling water out of a pot

**Oikawa:** Oh no

**Akaashi:** and I was pouring it and then my hands started burning and I was like oh jeez 

**Akaashi:** So I started pouring it out a little slower as if that would help

**Akaashi:** And basically poured boiling water all over my hands!!!

**Bokuto:** Akaashi no!!! 

**Bokuto:** Do you want me to come over???? I can bring you something

**Akaashi:** Bokuto, you don’t need to bring me anything. But it would be nice if you came over

**Sugawara:** When did that happen?? Are you okay???

**Akaashi:** It happened like an hour ago and it still hurts :-(

**Kageyama:** Oh no :-(

**Akaashi:** Ugh I’m okay I guess I’m just complaining!!

**Akaashi:** I don’t know why I still kept pouring it even though I knew it was on my hands

**Akaashi:** It’s the brain rot I guess

**Kuroo:** Brain rot is no joke </3

**Kenma:** You’re both insane

\--

**Nishinoya:** _ attached image _

**Nishinoya:** Asahi isn’t home, so I’m going through his closet!!

**Nishinoya:** This shirt goes all the way down to my knees!

**Kuroo:** 😃 what the fuck 😃

**Kuroo:** Nishinoya YOU’RE SO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Nishinoya:** Ikr? 🥰

**Tanaka:** BROOOOOO 

**Tanaka:** BRO YOU’RE MY WHOLE WORLD RN

**Nishinoya:** BROOOOOO 

**Sugawara:** Aww Noya!! Don’t be shy, send more pics!

**Nishinoya:** Okay!

**Nishinoya:** That one is from a little while ago, but I took a shower and here’s me trying on a different shirt!

**Nishinoya:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** YOUR HAIR!!!

**Oikawa:** Omg omg omg awwww

**Nishinoya:** _ attached image _

**Nishinoya:** Why does he own a shirt with carrots all over it

**Nishinoya:** And why are the sleeves so long (⋟﹏⋞)

**Hinata:** Omg that emoji looks like you

**Kenma:** Noya I’m going to Die

**Kenma:** You are so cute

**Asahi:** Omg Yuu!!

**Asahi:** Ahhh you’re so cute!!!

**Asahi:** YOU’RE SO CUTE!!

**Asahi:** Also the carrot shirt is my favorite one 🥺

**Nishinoya:** Then it’s my favorite too!

**Asahi:** You’re so cute

**Asahi:** I’ll be back soon!!

**Nishinoya:** Asahiii my handsome man!!!!!!!!!!

**Nishinoya:** Stop complimenting me in the groupchat!!! I’m getting embarrassed!!!!!

**Asahi:** Me too!!! Just call me instead!

**Nishinoya:** Okay!

**Sugawara:** You guys are so cute

**Hinata:** Let’s unpack why you think that

  
  



	76. head empty just that one time where i was in california on the beach and there was a 7.1 earthquake like how and why did that happen to me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: WHY ARE YOU EVEN STILL IN THIS CHAT
> 
> Atsumu: I’m like a roach infestation you can’t get rid of ❤️

**Hinata** changed the group name to  _ Kageyama _

**Kuroo:** LMAO??

**Kuroo:** The only group I EVER want to be apart of 🥵🤽

**Kenma:** Why did you choose that second emoji?

**Kuroo:** Idk it was calling to me

**Kenma:** You’re so stupid and weirfd

**Kenma:** I’m so in love with you

**Tanaka:** Woah

**Tanaka:** Kenma idk why but everytime you say things like that it catches me off guard 

**Kenma:** Good

**Sugawara:** Why is the group named after Kageyama?

**Hinata:** Because I love him!

**Tsukishima:** Ew

**Yamaguchi** changed the group name to  _ Tsukki _

**Tsukishima:** Why?

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi, why are you like this?

**Yamaguchi:** Because I love you!

**Sugawara:** NOBODY MOVE I’M GOING TO DIE

**Sugawara:** I’m obsessed with you two

**Hinata:** Stop. Be obsessed with me and Kageyama instead

**Sugawara:** Okay! I’ll be obsessed with everyone!!

**Sugawara:** But mostly just my Daichi 🥰

**Daichi:** Suga you’re so cute

**Sugawara:** You’re cuter! I love you!!

**Daichi:** I love you more!! 

**Sugawara:** Daichi!! Come over PLEASE!!!

**Daichi:** Omw!

\--

**Yamaguchi:** _ attached image _

**Yamaguchi:** What do you think?

**Sugawara:** Very cute! I have a pair that looks just like that!

**Kuroo:** LACE PANTIES OMG

**Hinata:** AHHHH YAMAGUCHI

**Yamaguchi:** OH MY GOD

**Yamaguchi:** teehee

**Yamaguchi:** TEEHEE TEEHEE 

**Kenma:** STOP SAYING TEEHEE???

**Yamaguchi:** I CAN’T 

**Yamaguchi:** I’M GONAN CRY

**Nishinoya:** Yamaguchi it’s looking right at me 👁👄👁

**Yamaguchi:** I

**Yamaguchi:** TEEHEE

**Yamaguchi:** THAT PICTURE WASN’T MEANT FOR YOU GUYS I’M SORRY

**Tsukishima:** Oh god

**Kageyama:** Dude everyone just saw your boyfriend's dick and you just say oh god??

**Tsukishima:** Oh god oh god

**Sugawara:** Well Tsukishima what do you think???

**Tsukishima:** Stop

**Tsukishima:** Omg

**Nishinoya:** Yamaguchi you look so cute!

**Kuroo:** True wtf he’s so blushy

**Tsukishima:** STOP LOOKING AT THE PICTURE

**Tsukishima:** TADASHI YOU’RE STUPID

**Yamaguchi:** IT WAS AN ACCIDENT

**Yamaguchi:** IT’S FINE 

**Tsukishima:** NO

**Yamaguchi:** WELL

**Yamaguchi:** AT LEAST I’M NOT LIKE OIKAWA WHO SENT FULL NUDES

**Oikawa:** EXCUSE ME

**Oikawa:** THAT MIGHT AS WELL BE ??? THERE’S LIKE NOTHING THERE

**Sugawara:** Well, I think you look nice Yamaguchi! There’s nothing to be embarrassed about!

**Tsukishima:** Don’t say that to him

**Tsukishima:** DON’T SAY THAT TO HIM OH MY GOD

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI CALM DOWN 

**Tsukishima:** NO

**Tsukishima:** YOU LOOK

**Tsukishima:** AHHHH

**Sugawara:** Omg. Keep going!

**Tsukishima:** No

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki come over 💌

**Sugawara:** That emoji omg so cute

**Tsukishima:** I’m on my way

**Oikawa:** Suga I think you’re the only person I’ve ever met who responds to an accidental nude with ‘omg cute’

**Sugawara:** Well!!!!! It was an accident!! I don’t want him to be embarrassed

**Nishinoya:** Yes!! I agree!! Yamaguchi you look very cute!

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ NOT Tsukki, don’t send nudes _

**Yamaguchi:** teehee teehee teehee

**Hinata:** HAHA STOP

**Yamaguchi:** TEEHEE I WANT TO DIE

**Sugawara:** I can send one to make you feel better!

**Kuroo:** DO IT YOU WON’T

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** Panties gang

**Kenma:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** I just had seven strokes wtf

**Kuroo:** Kebnma i wasn’t expecitn that

**Kenma:** Lol

**Kenma:** Anything for Yamaguchi

**Yamaguchi:** Omg

**Yamaguchi:** Omg omg omg

**Akaashi:** _ attached image _

**Bokuto:** WOAH

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Yamaguchi:** HINATA HAHA YES WE MATCH

**Hinata:** YES

**Sugawara:** HOW CUTE

**Oikawa:** WHAT IS HAPPENING I 

**Oikawa:** THERE

**Oikawa:** AHHHH

**Oikawa:** But also

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** I don’t have panties but I do have pics of me with nipple clamps teehee teehee

**Kuroo:** I KNEW YOU HAD THOSE

**Oikawa:** SHUT THE FUCK UP KUROO

**Yamaguchi:** Thanks guys! I think I feel better

**Yamaguchi:** Now I’m gonna go and get edged by tsukki 

**Kuroo:** OH MY GOD

**Nishinoya:** YES TSUKKI

\--

**Sugawara:** Sing once again with me

**Sugawara:** OUR STRANGE DUET

**Sugawara:** MY POWER OVER YOU

**Kageyama:** Grows stronger yet

**Sugawara:** And though you turn from me

**Sugawara:** To glance behind

**Kageyama** : The phantom of the opera is there inside your mind

**Sugawara:** Yes!!!!! Nice Kageyama!! I didn’t know you knew Phantom of the Opera!!

**Kageyama:** You said you liked it so I listened to it!:-)

**Sugawara:** My heart is going to explode I love you so much

**Kageyama:** I love you too!! :-)

**Sugawara:** (≧∇≦*)

**Akaashi:** Awww

**Akaashi:** What are you two cuties doing up? It’s almost 2am

**Sugawara:** I just got off of work

**Akaashi:** So late!!!

**Sugawara:** I know, I know

**Kageyama:** I can’t sleep

**Kageyama:** I think I’m having an allergic reaction 

**Hinata:** There’s, like, bumps and rashes all over his arms and legs

**Hinata:** He has a fever!!!!

**Kageyama:** And it’s really itchy

**Kuroo:** The fever is itchy?

**Kenma:** AHAHA

**Sugawara:** Oh jeez

**Akaashi:** Oh no

**Akaashi:** What happened?

**Kageyama:** I’m not sure

**Hinata:** I think he’s allergic to cats

**Hinata:** We were at Asahi’s a few hours ago, and Suzu was all over him. He kept sneezing too

**Kenma:** OH NO

**Kenma:** OH NO OH NO

**Kageyama:** It’s alright. I’m sure it’ll go away soon

**Hinata:** I think we should go to the doctor.

**Kageyama:** No, I’m sure it’ll be fine

**Hinata:** Tobio.

**Hinata:** You have a fever

**Sugawara:** Kageyama I think you should go

**Kenma:** Yeah, especially if it’s that bad

**Kageyama:** Omg

**Kageyama:** Okay fine

**Kageyama:** It’s literally 2am. 

**Hinata:** Literally so what?

**Daichi:** Kageyama, go.

**Kageyama:** It’s not a big deal.

**Hinata:** Tobio.

**Kageyama:** FINE

\--

**Hinata:** Kageyama is allergic to suzu :-(

**Hinata:** AND he’s also allergic to rabbits and even MORE allergic to horses

**Kageyama:** :-///

**Kageyama:** I got medicine for the rashes since they still haven’t gone down

**Kageyama:** Anyways, it’s 5am. Shouyou and I are going to sleep. Sorry if these notifications wake anyone up!

**Bokuto:** Don’t apologize Kageyama!! I hope you feel better soon!!!!!!!!

**Kageyama:** Thanks Bokuto :-)

**Bokuto:** Omg he smiled at me

**Bokuto:** Wait I have a question before you two go

**Bokuto:** It’s so important 

**Bokuto:** And urgent. When you two sleep together how do you cuddle??

**Bokuto:** Little spoon?? Big spoon??

**Hinata:** Tobio has been the little spoon a lot recently 🥺

**Bokuto:** Oh wow I just died

**Akaashi:** That’s so cute wtf

**Bokuto:** Ok that’s all! Goodnight you two!

\--

**Kenma:** I’m on my second iced coffee today!!

**Daichi:** wtf

**Daichi:** It’s only 3pm

**Kenma:** Yeah ✨🧚🏻‍♀️💫🦋

**Kenma:** my anxiety bout to go UP UP UP

**Kuroo:** Kenma no

**Kenma:** Kenma YES

**Sugawara:** Kenma YES

**Daichi:** No!! Drink something else you idiot

**Kenma:** slurp slurp mmm iced coffee

**Kuroo:** Kenma.

**Kenma:** Mm bean juice is iced mmmm slurp slurp

**Akaashi:** Kenmaaaa

**Kenma:** Akaashiiii

**Akaashi:** Come get high with me

**Kenma:** Omw omw omw 

**Kuroo:** Omfg

**Oikawa:** Guys!!!! Bad news!!!!!!!

**Daichi:** Oh No, what?

**Sugawara:** Why did you capitalize the n?

**Daichi:** Because I’m an idiot and it was an accident

**Sugawara:** I love dumb men 

**Oikawa:** OUR APARTMENT FLOODED

**Oikawa:** And me and Iwa-chan have to be SEPERATED

**Oikawa:** Because like we can’t stay there, they’re fixing it and stuff

**Oikawa:** And we’re both just going home to stay with our families 

**Oikawa:** FOR LIKE TWO WEEKS (´・＿・`)

**Kenma:** NOOOOOO

**Kageyama:** Oh no :-(

**Oikawa:** I’m going to DIE

**Iwaizumi:** It’ll be fine, Tooru

**Oikawa:** I’m going to die :-(

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll call you everyday baby ❤️

**Kuroo:** I just had a stroke again ogm

**Kuroo:** IWAIZUMI SAID BABY

**Oikawa:** I hear him say it everyday 😙

**Kuroo:** Oh to be you

\--

**Oikawa** and  **Iwaizumi:**

**Iwaizumi:** _ attached image _

**Iwaizumi:** Are you up? I can’t stop thinking about you.

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** Send me a video?

**Oikawa:** I want to hear you

**Iwaizumi:** Oh my god

**Iwaizumi:** Any requests? 

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** You know what I like, surprise me Hajime

\--

_ NOT Tsukki, don’t send nudes _

**Sugawara:** YOU GUYS

**Sugawara:** TANAKA’S PRIVATE SNAP STORY

**Sugawara:** CAN WE PLEASE TALK ABOUT IT

**Tanaka:** YES. PLEASE

**Kenma:** Wait what is it?

**Kenma:** I don’t feel like opening snapchat

**Kenma:** Kuro keeps kissing my face I’m too relaxed to be botherefd

**Sugawara:** IT’S A PIC OF KIYOKO LAUGHING WITH FROSTING ON HER NOSE

**Tanaka:** _ attached image _

**Tanaka:** We made a cake together for the sixth year anniversary of me being in love with her 😳

**Sugawara:** AHAHA I LOVE YOU GUYS

**Kenma:** She is so cute wtf

**Kenma:** Omg she looks so happy

**Kenma:** EW YOU CAN SEE THE LOVE IN HER EYES

**Kenma:** I’m about to die

**Daichi:** I’M GOING TO CRY

**Asahi: 🥺**

**Iwaizumi:** _ attached video _

**Kuroo:** Um wow 😳

**Kuroo:** Hahaha

**Kuroo:** I don’t think that was meant for us

**Kuroo:** But Iwaizumi… Man… 

**Kuroo:** Ur hot 😳

**Sugawara:** Oh wow 

**Sugawara:** OH WOW

**Daichi:** SUGA DON’T WATCH IT

**Iwaizumi:** FUCK OOPS

**Iwaizumi:** I’M SORRY

**Iwaizumi:** I’M SO EMBARRASSED 

**Tanaka:** No.. don’t be 😳

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN NO

**Oikawa:** GUYS DON’T WATCH IT

**Oikawa:** THAT’S MEANT FOR ME AND ME ONLY

**Kuroo:** It’s free real estate

**Oikawa:** NO

**Iwaizumi:** NO NO 

**Iwaizumi:** I NEED TO DIE

**Hinata:** Kageyama don’t look

**Oikawa:** OH GOD TOBIO DON’T LOOK

**Kageyama:** I WASN’T

**Kageyama:** Hinata YOU don’t look

**Hinata:** TOO LATE I DIDN’T READ THE CHAT

**Kageyama:** Whatever

**Iwaizumi:** Literally 

**Iwaizumi:** I want to die

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t talk to me

**Iwaizumi:** I’m so embarrassed 

**Nishinoya:** Iwaizumi FUCKS OMG

**Nishinoya:** Bruh 😳

**Kuroo:** My favorite song 🥰 is 😃 Iwaizumi Hajime 😏 moaning 🥵

**Kenma:** KURO STOP

**Sugawara:** My favorite song 🥰 is 😃 Iwaizumi Hajime 😏 moaning 🥵

**Oikawa:** NOO STOP

**Atsumu:** My favorite song 🥰 is 😃 Iwaizumi Hajime 😏 moaning 🥵

**Hinata:** ATSUMU OMG

**Atsumu:** I’m not trying to be funny, but I played that video ON FULL VOLUME ON ACCIDENT and Osamu goes “is that Hajime?”

**Oikawa:** WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME THAT

**Oikawa:** WHY ARE YOU EVEN STILL IN THIS CHAT

**Atsumu:** I’m like a roach infestation you can’t get rid of ❤️

**Bokuto:** My favorite song 🥰 is 😃 Iwaizumi Hajime 😏 moaning 🥵

**Oikawa:** NO

**Oikawa** removed  **Hinata Shouyou, Tanaka Ryu, Kozume Kenma, Kuroo Tetsurou, Sawamura Daichi, Azumane Asahi, Nishinoya Yuu, Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi Keiji, Iwaizumi Hajime, Miya Atsumu, Sugawara Koushi, Kageyama Tobio, Tsukishima Kei,** and  **Yamaguchi Tadashi** from the chat

**Oikawa** created a new group

**Oikawa** added  **Hinata Shouyou, Tanaka Ryu, Kozume Kenma, Kuroo Tetsurou, Sawamura Daichi, Azumane Asahi, Nishinoya Yuu, Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi Keiji, Iwaizumi Hajime, Miya Atsumu, Sugawara Koushi, Kageyama Tobio, Tsukishima Kei,** and  **Yamaguchi Tadashi** to the chat

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ This is a cleanse  _

**Atsumu:** Omg yay I’m still here

**Oikawa:** Roach 

**Sugawara:** You are so dramatic Oikawa 

\--

**Kuroo:** I know it’s like 4am 

**Kuroo:** But how did two accidental things happen this week

**Kuroo:** Is it something in the air?

**Kuroo:** Why did this happen to us

**Akaashi:** I think it’s the brain rot

**Kuroo:** Seriously, it’s no joke dude

  
  
  
  
  



	77. My Braino today is just Kageyama and if I'm not thinking about him I want to cry sooo I guess you can analyze my brain based off of that or whatever it's really up to you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama: :-((
> 
> Bokuto: TWO FROWNS NO NO KAGEYAMA I LOVE YOU
> 
> Kageyama: :-(
> 
> Hinata: KAGEYAMA I LOVE YOU MORE
> 
> Kageyama: :-

_ This is a cleanse _

**Oikawa:** I CANNOT I CANNOT

**Iwaizumi:** You’re overreacting

**Oikawa:** NO I AM NOT

**Nishinoya:** oooh tea 

**Kageyama:** What happened???

**Oikawa:** So me and Iwa-Chan are out, doing our thing. We stop at a coffee shop because I needed a pick me up 

**Oikawa:** The girl at the counter goes “I love your shirt”

**Oikawa:** And I got so excited that someone has also watched the anime that I have on my shirt

**Oikawa:** I say “oh my god thank you! That’s so period!!”

**Oikawa:** WHY DID I SAY THAT

**Iwaizumi:** You were excited lol it’s fine

**Oikawa:** I CANT SHOW MY FACE ANYWHERE LIKE I SHOULDNT BE ALLOWED OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE

**Iwaizumi:** baby it was fine lol

**Nishinoya:** BABY IWA-CHAN CALL ME BABY

**Asahi:** no no noya I’ll call you baby

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI ASAHI CALL ME BABY

**Asahi:** Not here

**Asahi:** That’s embarrassing 

**Nishinoya:** On my way IM OMW 

**Oikawa:** don’t call him Iwa-Chan

**Kageyama:** That’s not too embarrassing 

**Kageyama:** She probably thought it was funny

**Oikawa:** I’m a little reassured but also why would I feel that way from a freak 

**Kageyama:** :-(

**Bokuto:** MY KAGEYAMA IS SAD SOMEONE HELP

**Hinata:** My Kageyama oops oops

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up Tooru you know you love Kageyama

**Oikawa:** Nope actually I don’t

**Iwaizumi:** Okay but say that to your lock screen

**Oikawa:** I don’t know what you mean (๑╹ω╹๑ )

**Iwaizumi:** _ Attached Image _

**Oikawa:** I have never seen that picture I think it’s photoshopped

**Kageyama:** Aw I have that printed out

**Kageyama:** It’s on my desk right next to my Karasuno one

**Kageyama:** We should remake it. Like get Kindaichi and kunimi too

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan if you have a problem with me, just say it. It’d be so much easier for the both of us

**Iwaizumi:** I just don’t know why you act like you hate him

**Oikawa:** Because he’s ew

**Kageyama:** :-((

**Bokuto:** TWO FROWNS NO NO KAGEYAMA I LOVE YOU

**Kageyama:** :-(

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA I LOVE YOU MORE

**Kageyama:** :-

**Oikawa:** FINE OMG ITS MY LOCKSCREEN BECAUSE SOMETIMES I MISS YOUR STUPID FACE

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Oikawa:** ew 

**Iwaizumi:** Being honest isn’t hard idiot

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Tsukishima:** That's weird

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki yours is our picture with Kageyama and Hinata when we graduated high school

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi stop

**Yamaguchi** It was so cute. You set it as your lockscreen and never changed it lol

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi

**Tsukishima:** seriously

**Yamaguchi:** oops my bad teehee

**Yamaguchi:** Guess you have to 

**Yamaguchi:** ✨punish me🥴☺️☺️ oops oops

**Sugawara:** YAMAGUCHI AHAHA

**Kuroo:** Maybe he’ll send more risqué pics to the group and then we’ll just get a throng of them from everyone

**Kuroo:** Daichi you start!!

**Sugawara:** Kuroo I will not hesitate to

**Sugawara: 🙃** murder you🙃

**Sugawara:** 😘

**Kuroo:** Kenma you start!!

**Kenma:** No

**Kageyama:** sorry guys my lock screen isn’t a group pic

**Kageyama:** _ Attached Image _

**Kageyama:** It’s still cute though

**Hinata:** I have died I have died

**Hinata:** No one is invited to my funeral

**Kageyama:** Stop being dumb

**Hinata:** YOURE THE ONE THAT EXPOSED YOUR LOCKSCREEN TO THE GROUP

**Kageyama:** I THINK ITS CUTE DUMBASS SO WHAT

**Asahi:** Omg omg

**Asahi:** THATS THE CUTEST PICTURE EVER

**Daichi:** it’s so cute

**Oikawa:** Just Hinata AND Natsu

**Oikawa:** SLEEPING AND WEARING KAGEYAMAS SHIRTS EW EW

**Kenma:** OMG SOMEONE COME AND PUNCH ME IN THE EYE THATS SO CUTE

**Kuroo:** KENMA WHAT

**Kenma:** Omg ohmyg oHMYGODDD THATS CUTE KAGEYAMA YOURE A PRECIOUS GIFT TO THIS GROUP CHAT AND YOU NEED TO EXPOSE MORE OF YOU AND SHOUYOUS RELATIONSHIP

**Hinata:** HE DOES NOT

**Tanaka:** Coming from the Toaster Strudel

**Hinata:** IT WAS ONCE

**Kenma:** Actually I remember it being twice but that’s fine

**Hinata:** IT WAS ONLY TWO TIMES

**Kageyama:** IDIOT JUST SHUT UP

**Hinata:** KENMA WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO ME

**Kenma:** It’s natural selection in a way ☺️

**Akaashi:** We love to see it 

**Hinata:** Why is this suddenly about me when It should be about Oikawa

**Kenma:** Because Oikawa is so period 

**Sugawara:** He’s period as fuck

**Oikawa:** I’ll kiss both of you

**Iwaizumi:** you will not

**Sugawara:** Don't threaten me with a good time baby boy

**Oikawa:** I really don’t know why that was my reaction

**Oikawa:** But it has already been said

**Kenma:** Empty threats Oikawa wow

**Oikawa:** I hate both of you

**-**

**Kageyama:** I am weak

**Kageyama:** I’m the weakest person on the planet

**Daichi:** oh?

**Kageyama:** I literally will do anything Hinata asks

**Kageyama:** literally anything

**Hinata:** 🥺🥺 Kageyama

**Daichi:** That's because you’re in love

**Oikawa:** THATS BECAUSE YOURE WHIPPED

**Daichi:** no

**Sugawara:** it’s because you’re in love and oikawa is an idiot

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan will do anything for me

**Iwaizumi:** Yeah because you whine about it if I don’t

**Oikawa:** I-

**Oikawa:** Are we really breaking up in front of everyone?

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up stupid we’re never breaking up

**Kageyama:** Everything reminds me of Hinata and like

**Kageyama:** I just saw him yesterday but I wanna see him again today

**Kenma:** Omg you’re just so in love

**Kageyama:** Hinata will you come over after class?

**Hinata:** YES YES YES

**Kageyama:** Also

**Kageyama:** I bought you something today.

**Hinata:** stop stop I’m so excited

**-**

**Hinata:** UM UM KAGEYAMA IS THE CUTEST BOYFRIEND EVER THERE IS NO COMPETITION

**Hinata:** HE BOUGHT ME THIS CUTE FROG PLUSHY AND IT LOOKS SO GRUMPY IT LOOKS LIKE HIM AND ITS SO CUTE

**Hinata:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** HES JUST HUGGING IT BECAUSE I TOLD HIM I WISH IT SMELLED LIKE HIM

**Kenma:** Thats so 

**Kenma:** so 

**Kenma:** cute

**Kenma:** I’m TRYING TO CONTAIN MYSELF BUT I CANT THATS SO CUTE THATS SO CUTE

**Kenma:** LITERALLY IM MOVING FAR AWAY FROM YOU BITCHES NEVER EVEN THINK OF ME AGAIN

**Kenma:** HES jUST CUDDLING A FROG THAT LOOKS LIKE HIM EW EW EW SHOUYOU YOU BETTER HOPE I NEVER SEE YOUR FACE AGAIN STUPID

**Oikawa:** You need to chill out

**Kenma:** NO YOU NEED TO CHILL OUT 

**Kenma:** DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO WHEN KAGEYAMA AND HINATA ARE JUST BOYFRIENDS

**Hinata:** KENMA LMAOOO STOP

**Kenma:** okay I’ve calmed down

**Hinata:** Anyways. I’m gonna go take a nap

**Hinata:** Bye

**Kenma:** omg THEYRE PROBABLY GONNA CUDDLE WITH THE FROG EVERYONE SHUT UP SHUT UP

**Akaashi:** Kenma you’re on a whole other level this afternoon 

**Kenma:** Send PICTURES HINATA AND KAGEYAMA

**Kageyama:** We’re taking a nap sorry😴

**Hinata:** Sorry can’t respond we’re taking a nap😴 

**Kenma:** I hope you pee the bed during your nap Shouyou 🥰

**Oikawa:** KENMA PLEASE HAHH

  
  



	78. This is so serious and so boring and so dumb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: Just fucking kidding haha got you

**Yamaguchi** and  **Tsukishima** :

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki tsukki tsukkiiii

**Tsukishima:** lol Tadashi Tadashi Tadashiiii

**Yamaguchi:** I miss you

**Tsukishima:** You’re right next to me stupid

**Yamaguchi:** I want you to hug meeee

**Tsukishima:** Why didn’t you just ask

**Yamaguchi:** I would never say something that embarrassing with your brother right here ew

**Tsukishima:** Akiteru will probably take secret pictures and send them to my mom then she’ll print them out lol

**Yamaguchi:** He sends them to me too

**Tsukishima:** Why are you like that

**Yamaguchi:** Because I love you 

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI YOU’RE BLUSHING

**Tsukishima:** I’m not you’re just crazy

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki tsukki tsukkiiiii

**Tsukishima:** Shut up

_ This is a cleanse _

**Akaashi:** Suga, I need your advice!

**Sugawara:** Yes

**Akaashi:** yes or no

**Sugawara:** Ummm

**Sugawara:** What do you mean?

**Akaashi:** Just yes or no

**Sugawara:** No

**Sugawara:** ???

**Akaashi:** Oh thank god oh thank GOD

**Akaashi:** Konoha is getting a tattoo so I went with him

**Akaashi:** And he said to ask someone random yes or no and if they said yes I have to get the first thing I thought of tattooed

**Akaashi:** And my mind was only letting me think of Bokuto’s ass so you saved me

**Kuroo:** BOKUTO’S ASS

**Kuroo:** BOKUTO I’LL GET YOURS AND YOU GET MINE

**Kenma:** I wouldn’t marry a man with Bokuto’s ass tattooed on him

**Bokuto:** KENMA WHY

**Kenma:** Because I don’t WANT TO BE ANYWHERE NEAR IT

**Bokuto:** Kenma 😢

**Sugawara:** Lol 

**Oikawa:** Suga, do you like tattoos?

**Sugawara:** I do 

**Oikawa:** Lets get matching ones omgomg

**Oikawa:** I’ll get Hajime and you can get Daichi

**Sugawara:** omg imagine

-

**Tsukishima:** I thought you guys would like to see this

**Tsukishima:** _ Attached Image _

**Kenma:** Hinata and yamaguchi CUDDLING

**Kenma:** SOMEONE PERFORM CPR ON ME

**Tsukishima:** They’re cute

**Bokuto:** TSUKKI IS SHOWING EMOTIONS

**Bokuto:** POSITIVE EMOTIONS

**Oikawa:** SUGA SUGA ARE YOU SEEING THIS

**Oikawa:** DAICHI OMG DAICHI

**Sugawara:** lol sorry i was finishing an assignment but now I’m screaming

**Sugawara:** Daichi’s at work

**Sugawara:** You guys are so cute

**-**

**Kenma:** Kuroo cropped one of my old hoodies for me

**Kenma:** _ Attached Image _

**Kuroo:** You’re the cutest YOU’RE THE CUTEST

**Kuroo:** MY SWEET KENMA

**Oikawa:** YES KENMA YOU LOOK SO CUTE FUCK IT UP

**Akaashi:** Kenma’s so cute kenma’s so cute

**Akaashi:** Suga Suga Suga

**Akaashi:** Kenma needs you to boost his confidence

**Kenma:** We need Suga’s input we CRAVE Suga’s input

**Kageyama:** You look cute Kenma :-)

**Kageyama:** Oh and Suga is here. He’s taking a nap

**Oikawa:** Suga is with you?

**Kageyama:** Yup.

**Oikawa:** Interesting lol

**-**

**Oikawa** and  **Sugawara**

**Oikawa:** Hey are you okay?

**Sugawara:** ?

**Oikawa:** Idk you seem so different

**Oikawa:** Like you’re super dry in the groupchat

**Oikawa:** Usually you’d take any opportunity to talk about Daichi

**Oikawa:** Or to praise Tsukishima and Tobio but you haven't done any of that

**Oikawa:** And also we haven’t heard from Daichi in a while

**Sugawara:** I’m alright?

**Sugawara:** Just fucking kidding haha got you

**Oikawa:** Oh my

**Sugawara:** Okay so basically my boyfriend is too nice for his own good and I’m pissed off

**Oikawa:** Oh no

**Sugawara:** I know!

**Sugawara:** He’s still hanging out with Yui

**Sugawara:** And like, I already expressed how I feel about them hanging out

**Sugawara:** And he told me that he would stop hanging around her so much

**Sugawara:** I totally get that they’ve been friends for so long and their families are close and all of that. That’s why I’m not asking him to cut her off completely

**Sugawara:** It just sucks so much that he’ll invite me over and then text her so much while we’re spending time together. Or that I’ll be at his place and sometimes she’ll just come in. Like, whyyy

**Sugawara:** And I feel bad because I know that he doesn’t like her like that but I hate watching them together. You’ve seen it Tooru, she’s so obviously in love with him. And I trust Daichi with all of my heart but I can only be so patient you know and he hasn’t even talked to her about us because he’s scared she’ll be embarrassed and sad

**Sugawara:** It’s just so frustrating that he’s prioritizing her feelings over mine. It makes me so sad

**Sugawara:** I’ve been spending the night at Kageyama’s because I just need some serotonin

**Oikawa:** Did you guys break up?!!

**Sugawara:** No but I was just yelling at him and I told him to talk to me when he figures out his shit and omg Tooru you should’ve seen his face

**Sugawara:** He looked so so sad and I wanted to just hug him and say I’m sorry but if I do that then nothing will ever get done so I just went to Kageyama’s 

**Oikawa:** Have you talked to Daichi at all?

**Sugawara:** No.

**Sugawara:** Kageyama is holding my phone usually to ensure that I don’t text him first.

**Sugawara:** Daichi texted stuff like “Hey” and “How are you?” but Kageyama refuses to let me reply to those.

**Oikawa:** Okay good 

**Oikawa:** That’s really good.

**Oikawa:** I’d be so upset if I were you

**Oikawa:** He really is too nice and maybe a little dense. Like it’s so obvious she likes him lol

**Oikawa:** I’m sure Daichi is probably stressed right now too

**Sugawara:** oh god don’t say that

**Sugawara:** I miss my Daichi so much

**Oikawa:** I didn’t mean to make you sad. Oh god

**Oikawa:** I was gonna say that maybe Iwa-chan can talk to him?

**Oikawa:** They can have like idk guy time and he can figure his shit out

**Sugawara:** Okay that sounds good

**Sugawara:** God I miss him but I’m so upset with him 

**Sugawara:** I feel so UGLY

**Oikawa:** Literally shut up and go hug Kageyama or something

**Oikawa:** Hinata says he’s great at cuddling

**Sugawara:** He is and I want to die

**Sugawara:** I love my son so much :’-)

**Oikawa:** Yuck

**Oikawa:** I’m glad you’re okay. I just wanted to check on you.

**Oikawa:** Use my bottom charm to make you feel a little better

**Sugawara:** lmaoooo I hate you

**Oikawa:** You can talk to me about anything. I hope you know that. And if Tobio bores you or annoys you, I’ll be more than happy to have you over here!

**Sugawara:** Awww Tooru thanks 💗

**Oikawa: 💗**

**-**

_ This is a cleanse _

**Sugawara:** GOOD MORNING TO ALL OF THE BADDIES HERE

**Kenma:** early

**Kuroo:** Literally it’s 5am Suga. No one is up

**Sugawara:** It’s baddies hour

**Sugawara:** Only the baddest of baddies are up rn

**Oikawa:** Go to bed idiot

**Sugawara:** You just wish you were on my level. I’m the baddie of all baddies

**Sugawara:** Is no one gonna reply?

**Sugawara:** So everyone hates me?

**Sugawara:** Fine I’m going to bed

**-**

**Kuroo** and  **Sugawara**

**Kuroo:** What’s up with you?

**Sugawara:** What?

**Kuroo:** You’re acting all weird and quiet and then all of a sudden you’re overcompensating

**Kuroo:** Is everything alright?

**Sugawara:** It’s kind of a long story

**Sugawara:** In short, me and Daichi are kinda going through it right now. And like

**Sugawara:** I don’t want to bring the group down but I didn’t think anyone would notice

**Kuroo:** NO NOT THE POWER COUPLE SUGA SUGA SUGA NO

**Kuroo:** OH GOD HOW IS THIS HAPPENING

**Sugawara:** it’ll be fine I think

**Sugawara:** Just a little rough patch haha

**Kuroo:** Are you okay?

**Sugawara:** Yeah yeah yeah I’m just sorta, waiting things out? Organizing my thoughts? Hugging Kageyama all day

**Kuroo:** I’d kill to hug that man

**Sugawara:** You’re stupid

**Sugawara:** I’m going to bed idiot

**Kuroo:** Just so you know

**Kuroo:** I’m gonna check on you again later

**Kuroo:** At a normal hour

**Sugawara:** goodnight Kuroo 💕

**Kuroo:** ❤️

**-**

**Iwaizumi** and  **Daichi**

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t know how to put this nicely

**Iwaizumi:** But why are you being so dumb

**Iwaizumi:** We all told you to just tell Michimiya that there’s no chance but you still haven’t

**Daichi:** I know I know

**Daichi:** I tried but I get so nervous

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t understand why though

**Iwaizumi:** Are suga’s feelings not enough of a reason for you to tell her?? Do you like her or something

**Daichi:** No no 

**Daichi:** Okay i just

**Daichi:** She has never told me she likes me. What if I randomly just go “Sorry Yui, I’m in love with Suga so you don’t have a chance” and she doesn’t even like me

**Daichi:** And if she does like me

**Daichi:** What if she cries and it’s awkward for our families

**Daichi:** i don’t know I’m so conflicted

**Iwaizumi:** If Suga AND Oikawa tell you she likes you, she probably likes you

**Iwaizumi:** Daichi the first time she was brought up in this chat everyone knew who you guys were talking about. She likes you.

**Iwaizumi:** And you don’t have to say it to her like that

**Iwaizumi:** You can just simply tell her that you’re dating Suga and that you like guys 

**Iwaizumi:** And as your friend, she should understand that

**Daichi:** Okay I’ll text her right now and see when she’s free

**Iwaizumi:** If she isn’t free then just do it over the phone

**Daichi:** Maybe I’ll just call her! That sounds less awkward

**Iwaizumi:** Just get it done already omg why are you like this

**Iwaizumi:** Let me know how it goes

**-**

**Daichi** and  **Sugawara**

**Daichi:** I talked to Yui

**Daichi:** I called her and told her that I don’t really like girls. She kinda just kept quiet so then I told her that I have a boyfriend and she asked who and then I told her that we’ve been dating since like, the end of high school

**Daichi:** She cried and it was so awkward

**Daichi:** But she said she was really happy for us 

**Daichi:** I’m sorry it took me so long Koushi 

**Daichi:** I miss you so much

**Sugawara:** Finally

**Sugawara:** I literally thought you were never going to tell her

**Sugawara:** I really shouldn’t be thanking you for doing something so simple

**Sugawara:** But thank you for telling her

**Sugawara:** I know you were probably so nervous and uncomfortable lol

**Daichi:** I really was lol

**Sugawara:** So what did we learn from this?

**Daichi:** That I’m dumb and emotions are scary to handle?

**Sugawara:** And?

**Daichi:** And that I should think about my boyfriend before I think about anyone else

**Sugawara:** And?

**Daichi:** And that I can’t live without you

**Sugawara:** I was thinking more along the lines of “you’re better than anyone else in the world and if anyone even tries to act on their emotions towards me they better think twice”

**Daichi:** That too 

**Daichi:** I missed you so much Suga omg

**Daichi:** I went to your place a few times but you were never there

**Sugawara:** Not saying I ditched all of my classes to be with our son

**Sugawara:** But I ditched all of my classes to be with our son

**-**

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ Daichi 😍 _

**Oikawa:** Oh

**Kageyama:** Oh

**Iwaizumi:** Oh

**Kuroo:** Oh

**Hinata:** Wut

**Hinata:** Wut is happening

**Sugawara:** Daichi has been holding my hand all day

**Sugawara:** He’s so cute

**Daichi:** You’re so cute Suga

**Sugawara:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** My Daichi is the cutest

**Kuroo:** Disgusting

**Kuroo:** I’m so happy rn

**Oikawa:** Me too

**Hinata:** wut

**Iwaizumi:** Me too

**Hinata:** Wut

**Kageyama:** Me too

**Hinata:** None of this means anything to me

**Kageyama:** Good

**Hinata:** WUT KAGEYAMA TELL ME

**Kageyama:** You’re stupid

**Hinata:** NOTHING MAKES SENSE

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	79. Will I ever stop writing these?? Who knows!??!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: Aw Kageyama you’ve been so active in the chat lately  
> Oikawa: That's why I hate it here  
> Sugawara: TAKE THAT BACK  
> Kuroo: YOU TAKE THAT BACK

_ Daichi 😍 _

**Kageyama:** Does anyone want to have lunch with me in like an hour?

**Kageyama:** I’m gonna make some food but I forgot Hinata was busy today and I don’t want to eat alone. And I know Daichi and Suga have class

**Yamaguchi:** Me and Tsukki just got lunch. Sorry 😞

**Kageyama:** It’s fine 🧡

**Yamaguchi: ❤️**

**Kenma:** Woah the orange heart

**Kageyama:** It reminds me of Shouyou lol

**Kageyama:** I love it

**Kenma:** STOP KAGEYAMA THATS CUTE

**Kenma:** SCREENSHOT SCREENSHOT SCREENSHOT

**Sugawara:** DAICHI LOOK HE’S BEING SO CUTE

**Daichi:** I knowwww I’m gonna die

**Kuroo:** I want to have lunch with Kageyama😩 why must I live so far

**Iwaizumi:** I can come over

**Kageyama:** Okay!! :-)

**Oikawa:** EXCUSE ME

**Oikawa:** IM BEING LEFT OUT??

**Kageyama:** you can come too!

**Oikawa:** No

**Sugawara:** Then why did you even bring it up

**Oikawa:** Because I wanted to reject his invite 

**Oikawa:** I needed to feel powerful

**Iwaizumi:** why don’t you just come with me?

**Oikawa:** I’m actually busy at that time lol

**Kageyama:** I’ll pack food for Iwaizumi to bring for you

**Sugawara:** DAICHI DAICHI LOOK PLEASE LOOK HES BEING TOO CUTE I'M LEVITATING

**Daichi:** Suga omg

**-**

**Bokuto:** Hey Akaashi

**Bokuto:** Akaashiiiii

**Bokuto:** Heyyy Akaaaashiiiiiii

**Bokuto:** Akaashi Akaashi Akaashi

**Bokuto:** AKAASHIIIII

**Kenma:** Bokuto he obviously isn’t responding. You’ve messaged him in EVERY group chat

**Kuroo:** Be gentle with him Kenma

**Kuroo:** Bro, he obviously isn’t responding. You messaged him in every group chat

**Bokuto:** Whyyy

**Bokuto:** He hasn’t answered any of my calls for a while

**Bokuto:** I’m having such a bad day

**Bokuto:** And it’s so cold 

**Bokuto:** I just want to hear his voice or something 

**Bokuto:** What if he wants to break up with me?

**Kenma:** he would never

**Bokuto:** What if he’s running away so he can get married to someone while I’m waiting and rotting away in my room

**Kenma:** He would never

**Bokuto:** Akaashiiii please I love you so much don’t do that

**Kageyama:** What's wrong Bokuto?

**Bokuto:** I don’t really know? I’m just not having a good day. I woke up sad and I haven’t seen Akaashi all day

**Kageyama:** I’m sorry :-(

**Bokuto:** now Kageyama is FROWNING CAN THIS DAY GET ANY WORSE

**Akaashi:** Sorry! I’m here

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** I left my phone in one of my classes and the professor was gone and it was just a mess

**Akaashi:** Anyways, I’m here with 13%

**Bokuto:** You can charge your phone at my place

**Bokuto:** And we can take a bath

**Akaashi:** Okay I’m already on my way lol

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

**Akaashi:** Please calm down lol

**Bokuto:** I JUST LOVE YOU SO MUCH

**Akaashi:** I love you more now stop blowing up the chat

**Kenma:** I feel SICK TO MY STOMACH 

**Kenma:** Maybe I should say sick to my ✨🥺tummy🌸✨ they’re so cute

**Kageyama:** lmaooo

**Kuroo:** KENMA MADE MY KING LAUGH OMGOMG

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI THE DOOR IS UNLOCKED SO JUST COME IN BECAUSE ITS COLD

**Akaashi:** okay ☺️

**Bokuto:** ☺️☺️☺️🥰😍😘😍🥰🥰🥰🥰

**Kenma:** omg OMG

**Kenma:** I have never peed this much in my entire life

**Sugawara:** KENMA

-

**Akaashi:** We took our bath

**Akaashi:** _Attached Image_

**Akaashi:** He literally hasn’t let go of me since I walked in

**Nishinoya:** Thats so cute that’s so cute that’s so cute I’m evolving

**Nishinoya:** you’re just ALLOWED TO DRY HIS HAIR WHILE HE HUGS YOU OKAY WOW OKAY

**Akaashi:** Not gonna lie

**Akaashi:** if he keeps kissing my shoulders and neck I might 

**Akaashi:** 😇 act up 🤰🏻🤰🏻

**Kuroo:** Oh my

**Nishinoya:** IF BOKUTO FUCKS I WILL REACH MY FINAL FORM 

**Akaashi:** Lol

**Akaashi** changed the group name to  _ Bokuto Fucks _

**Akaashi:** Bye guys

**Kenma:** Kuroo literally just punch me in the throat AKAASHI AND BOKUTO OMG

**Nishinoya:** AKAASHI REALLY JUST SAID 🤰🏻🥴🥴😤🥰🤪🤪🤪🤤🤤🤤🤤

**-**

**Oikawa:** It’s the lip gloss obsession for me

**Sugawara:** It’s the plaid shorts outfit for me

**Oikawa:** it’s the shoe therapy for me

**Sugawara:** It’s the bottom denial for me

**Oikawa:** It’s the daddy kink even though you have a healthy relationship with your dad for me

**Sugawara:** it’s the fan club full of girls even though you like guys for me

**Oikawa:** it’s the jealousy issues for me

**Sugawara:** It’s the poor attitude because your underclassman is better than you for me

**Oikawa:** It’s the benched mom energy for me

**Sugawara:** it’s the ignored mom energy for me

**Oikawa:** It’s the depression for me

**Sugawara:** It’s the pining since childhood for me

**Oikawa:** it's the grey hair for me

**Sugawara:** it’s the unflattering ass in clothes for me

**Oikawa:** oh

**Sugawara:** oop

**Kenma:** SHUT UP AHAHAH

**-**

**Sugawara:** I just got

**Sugawara:** an apology?? from Yui

**Oikawa:** what do the question marks mean

**Sugawara:** so she said sorry if she did anything wrong or hurt my feelings in any way

**Sugawara:** but then she like

**Sugawara:** confessed her love for my boyfriend to me after that

**Sugawara:** She just says things when she’s nervous or overwhelmed so whatever

**Sugawara:** but baby girl WHAT

**Sugawara:** I-

**Sugawara:** “I didnt really notice anything, I wouldn’t have acted that way if I did know. I’ve just liked Daichi for so long and I get so nervous haha”

**Sugawara:** BITCH ME TOO WHAT

**Sugawara:** LIKE IS SHE OKAY WITH ME WANTING HER DEAD I DONT GET IT

**Sugawara:** It’s fine it’s fine it’s fine it’s fine she said sorry

**Sugawara:** That’s all that matters teehee Anyways

**Oikawa:** Yeah now just

**Oikawa:** Ignore her unless you HAVE to acknowledge her teehee

**Sugawara:** teehee

**Oikawa:** teehee

**Yamaguchi:** teehee

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Sugawara:** Aw Kageyama you’ve been so active in the chat lately

**Oikawa:** That's why I hate it here

**Sugawara:** TAKE THAT BACK

**Kuroo:** YOU TAKE THAT BACK

**Oikawa:** He has a whole defense squad but he doesn’t need or deserve one wut

**Sugawara:** HE DOES NEED ONE BECAUSE PEOPLE LIKE YOU WHO ARE IN DENIAL OF THEIR LOVE FOR HIM

**Kuroo:** LOVE HIM

**Oikawa:** no

**Kuroo:** You disgust me

**-**

**Sugawara** and  **Daichi**

**Sugawara:** How was work today?

**Daichi:** it went by pretty fast. Did you have a good day?

**Sugawara:** I did ☺️

**Daichi:** Suga

**Sugawara:** Daichi ☺️

**Daichi:** Koushi

**Sugawara:** what?

**Daichi:** Do you want something? You’re texting weird lmao

**Sugawara:** I just wanted to tell you that I missed you today

**Daichi:** I missed you too ❤️

**Sugawara:** And that I was hoping you were gonna come over after work

**Daichi:** I would’ve but you have early classes tomorrow

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** I even put on your favorite pair

**Daichi:** Baby

**Sugawara:** And the shirt you left here smells like you ❤️

**-**

_ Bokuto Fucks _

**Asahi:** Weirdly enough I’m craving chaos

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI FINALLY

**Asahi:** Like I don’t know… this group has ruined me

**Asahi:** I’m at the edge of my seat

**Asahi:** What’s gonna happen next you know 

**Asahi:** Who’s nudes are accidentally getting leaked this time?

**Nishinoya:** hopefully yours 🤤

**Tanaka:** HHAHA SHUT UP NOYA

**Nishinoya:** I’m just being honest

**Asahi:** Noya… 

**Daichi:** _ Attached video _

**Tsukishima:** wow an action shot

**Kageyama:** WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT KEI

**Sugawara:** Hey! That video was for me

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI RANDONAUTED THAT WOW I LOVE YOUR MANIFESTING POWERS ASAHI

**Asahi:** Omg omg

**Daichi:** I’m so sorry guys haha

**Daichi:** I should mute the groupchat next time huh

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Suga is bout to 🤰🏻🤰🏻😤😳🤪🤪🤪 _

**Kenma:** 🥴 Daichi

**Tanaka:** Daddy🤤🤤

**Kuroo:** HEY DAICHI WHAT THE HELL MAN WHERE WAS THIS ENERGY WHEN WE WERE DATING. ALL I GOT WAS RUSHED PICS

**Oikawa:** Daichi just 👏🏻🙈moans🥴 ✨baby🥰🤤🤤🤤 Koushi😫😳😳😳😲

**Yamaguchi:** Incredible

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi

**Yamaguchi:** I mean teehee

**Daichi:** This group is cursed

**Akaashi:** No no we’re definitely blessed now

**Bokuto:** Daichi just moans like that😤🤤🤤🥴🤪

**Sugawara:** it’s better when it’s in your ear 🥰🥰

**Daichi:** Koushi

**Sugawara:** sorry sorry sorry

**Kenma:** Daichi said lets give the people what they want

**Oikawa:** I’m gonna be thinking about that sound for days

**Iwaizumi:** Me too

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN NO

**Sugawara:** okay he’s really embarrassed. That’s enough. Everyone say thank you daddy and move on with your night

**Daichi:** SUGA


	80. when apparently there's highlights of me in your brain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata: How did you guys know you were in love?
> 
> Kageyama: Wtf why
> 
> Hinata: Because I love you and I’m thinking about you

_ Suga is bout to 🤰🏻🤰🏻😤😳🤪🤪🤪 _

**Oikawa:** Omg guys~

**Oikawa:** Guess what

**Kageyama:** What?

**Oikawa:** Omg hi Tobio!

**Kageyama:** Hi! :-)

**Sugawara:** Omg Oikawa you’re being nice to him 

**Oikawa:** I guess I’m in a good mood

**Oikawa:** Weird

**Oikawa:** Anyways no one guessed what so I’ll just tell you all!!!

**Oikawa:** Mine and Iwa-chan’s apartment got fixed! So we’re moving back tomorrow!

**Iwaizumi:** I’m so excited to see you baby

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan I’ve missed you so much!!!

**Iwaizumi:** You’re so cute

**Hinata:** WOAH

**Hinata:** Iwaizumi is being nice

**Kageyama:** He’s always nice, idiot

**Tanaka:** To you 😔

**Oikawa:** Stop, my iwa-chan is always nice to me!!

**Iwaizumi:** I love you

**Oikawa:** I love you more

**Iwaizumi:** As soon as you get back, I’m not letting you out of my sight for a week at least

**Oikawa:** 🥺❤️

**Sugawara:** Daichi I want this energy

**Daichi:** You already get that energy

**Sugawara:** I know ❤️

**Nishinoya:** I think I’m obsessed with clingy Iwaizumi

**Kuroo:** Me too wtf

**Oikawa:** Omg when Koushi tried to steal my spotlight and failed💋 try harder next time sweetie

**Sugawara:** I’ll kill you

**Oikawa:** Ew my mom just came back from work

**Oikawa:** Oh god she wants to have a talk with me before I go back home

**Oikawa:** Teehee teehee brb

**Sugawara:** Oh god. Sounds scary

**Oikawa:** It is

**Oikawa:** I’m shivering in me timbers

**Yamaguchi:** OMG HAHA

**Daichi:** Do you and your mom not get along?

**Oikawa:** Nope

**Iwaizumi:** Call me when you guys are done 

**Oikawa:** Of course!!!

\--

**Iwaizumi and Oikawa**

_ Incoming call from:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

_ Call declined _

**Iwaizumi:** Sorry if you’re still busy

**Iwaizumi:** I just wanted to check up on you

**Iwaizumi:** You’ve been quiet for a few hours

**Iwaizumi:** Call me, okay?

**Iwaizumi:** I love you

-

_ Incoming call from:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

_ Call declined _

-

**Iwaizumi:** I’m getting kind of worried

**Iwaizumi:** I’m just going to assume you went to sleep.

**Iwaizumi:** Good night Tooru ❤️

-

_ Incoming call from:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

_ Missed call _

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru, answer your phone.

_ Incoming call from:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

_ Missed call _

_ Incoming call from:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

_ Missed call _

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru.

**Iwaizumi:** I’m back at the apartment. 

**Iwaizumi:** Please just text me to let me know you’re okay. 

**Iwaizumi:** I love you. 

**\--**

_ Suga is bout to 🤰🏻🤰🏻😤😳🤪🤪🤪 _

**Hinata:** How did you guys know you were in love?

**Kageyama:** Wtf why

**Hinata:** Because I love you and I’m thinking about you

**Hinata:** And I’m trying to figure out when I knew I was in love with you

**Hinata:** But I can’t figure it out because I feel like I’ve loved you forever

**Kageyama:** Idiot. 

**Kageyama:** Remember when you made that towel crown?

**Sugawara:** DURING YOUR FIRST YEAR IN HIGH SCHOOL?????

**Kageyama:** Yes

**Hinata:** Omg

**Hinata:** TOBIO WHAT

**Kageyama:** WHAT

**Hinata:** THAT WAS SO LONG AGO

**Kageyama:** WELL YOU ASKED

**Hinata:** WHATEVER

**Hinata:** Can you facetime? 🥺

**Kageyama:** Of course.

**Sugawara:** That was so cute

**Sugawara:** Anyways I realized I was in love with Daichi when he kissed me for the first time teehee

**Daichi:** Aww Suga

**Daichi:** Mine is kinda weird lol, it was watching Suga yell at Kageyama during practice one time

**Sugawara:** OMG 

**Kuroo:** I’ve been in love with Kenma for forever, I really don’t remember when I realized tbh

**Kuroo:** Wait

**Kuroo:** Wait it’s coming

**Kuroo:** my brain is birthing a memory

**Kenma:** Why do you exist

**Kuroo:** I think it was right before I got my first girlfriend. 

**Kuroo:** We were hanging out and eating dinner and playing video games because his parents weren’t home, i think when we were like 14? And he was playing something and was like ‘Kuro give me a bite of that’ and kind of just leaned his head over without looking away from the screen and opened his mouth and idk why but like

**Kuroo:** All of a sudden I was blushing like crazy and he was the cutest thing I’d ever seen in my life

**Kenma:** Wtf

**Kenma:** I kind of just knew? I don’t think I ever had, like, a shocking realization

**Kenma:** Like. I’ve never felt safer than I do when I’m with him

**Kenma:** And like when I’m with him everything is just better. And I feel like I can look at him forever, and even when he’s annoying I smile and want him to keep talking

**Sugawara:** That’s so cute

**Yamaguchi:** I told Tsukki what my favorite flower was like once when we were 12 I think, and third year of high school when we were on a date he brought me a bunch of them

**Yamaguchi:** I was so surprised that he remembered and honestly the sight of him at my door with a bouquet of sunflowers while he was blushing like.. Iconic luv 

**Tsukishima:** Why are you talking like that?

**Tsukishima:** You’re so embarrassing Tadashi

**Yamaguchi:** I love you

**Tsukishima:** I think that was when I realized I loved you too? Seeing your reaction to that made me feel so… weird

**Tsukishima:** Ew I don’t want to get mushy in a groupchat. Nevermind

**Sugawara:** This is SO CUTE THIS IS SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** Daichi do you see our kids do you see our kids

**Daichi:** I see them I see them I see them

**Nishinoya:** Idk when I realized I loved Asahi

**Nishinoya:** I think I just always have B)

**Asahi:** I.. don’t think i know when I fell in love with Yuu either

**Nishinoya:** Effing soulmates

**Sugawara:** EFFING

**Bokuto:** AHHHH WE’RE LIKE ONE OF THE ONLY ONES WHO HAVEN’T REPLIED

**Bokuto:** SORRY WE WERE SLEEPING

**Kenma:** “sleeping”

**Bokuto:** I fell in love with Akaashi the very first time I met him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Bokuto:** As soon as I saw him!!

**Akaashi:** Aww, Bokuto

**Akaashi:** I realized I was in love with Bokuto when he took me ice skating and he fell on his ass and I didn’t think he was annoying for not being able to keep up with me

**Kenma:** OMG HAHA

**Sugawara:** Oikawa!!! Iwaizumi!!!! What about you guys???

**Sugawara:** I WANT TO HEAR ABOUT IT

**Hinata:** Oikawa has been in love with Iwaizumi for so long lol

**Hinata:** Like

**Hinata:** I remember him talking about it when I was like 10 and I was so confused

**Sugawara:** TELL US OIKAWA OIKAWA

**Kenma:** Ugh he’s taking too long

**Kenma:** Someone wake me up when he replies 

**Kenma:** Kuroo when you get home from work will you please give me a kiss

**Kenma:** And play with my hair 

**Kuroo:** Of course. I can’t wait to

**Kenma:** I love you 

**Kenma:** ANYWAYS GOODNIGHT YOU GUYS

**Akaashi:** Kozume it is literally 4pm

**Kenma:** Don’t call me that bitch

**Kenma:** Anyways

**Kenma:** goodnight i said what i said ❤️

\--

**Iwaizumi and Oikawa**

_ Incoming call from:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

_ Call declined _

_ New voicemail from:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

_ Incoming call from:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

_ Missed call _

_ New voicemail from:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

_ Incoming call from:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

_ Missed call _

_ New voicemail from:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru, answer your fucking phone.

**Iwaizumi:** This is getting ridiculous. 

**Iwaizumi:** Please just fucking talk to me.

**Iwaizumi:** Tell me what’s wrong.

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t know what’s wrong, but please just let me help.

**\--**

**Iwaizumi** and  **Ushijima**

**Iwaizumi:** I have a weird favor to ask.

**Ushijima:** Okay

**Iwaizumi:** If I add you to a groupchat, will you add Tendou?

**Ushijima:** Why?

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa won’t talk to me and I’m running out of ideas. 

**Iwaizumi:** You and Tendou always seem to rile him up

**Ushijima:** Why not just call him?

**Iwaizumi:** I’ve tried that for a week now. He still won’t answer. He hasn’t come home, but he’s been reading all of my messages. 

**Iwaizumi:** I think I’m getting desperate?

**Ushijima:** You’re not the type of person who usually gets desperate.

**Iwaizumi:** I know. But here I am

\--

_ Suga is bout to 🤰🏻🤰🏻😤😳🤪🤪🤪 _

**Iwaizumi** added  **Ushijima**

**Kuroo:** What the fuck

**Atsumu:** What the fuck

**Kageyama:** Hm. 

**Sugawara:** Hi Ushijima!

**Ushijima:** Hello.

**Ushijima** added  **Tendou**

**Tendou:** HELLOOOOOO GUYS

**Tendou:** HOW IS EVERYONE’S DAY???

**Bokuto:** HELLO RANDOM NUMBER

**Tendou:** The name is Tendou Satori, God of Awesome Sauce

**Kenma:** Wtf

**Kenma:** Iwaizumi, why did you do this to me?

**Kenma:** Kuro I’m scared

**Tendou:** WHERE’S OIKAWA????

**Sugawara:** No, no. Don’t flirt with him

**Tendou:** I could never!!!!! My heart is loyal to my one and only!!!!!!

**Daichi:** What

**Kuroo:** Wtf who

**Tendou:** USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI OF COURSE

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Tendou:** _ attached image _

**Ushijima:** Why did you send that?

**Tendou:** They have to see us!!!

**Tsukishima:** This is weird. Why is this happening?

**Iwaizumi** removed  **Ushijima** and  **Tendou** from the chat

**Sugawara:** What

**Daichi:** What

**Kuroo:** Wtf

\--

**Oikawa** and  **Kageyama:**

**Kageyama:** Hi, Oikawa. How are you doing?

**Oikawa:** I’m fine.

**Kageyama:** Are you sure?

**Oikawa:** Yes wtf.

**Oikawa:** Did Hajime ask you to message me?

**Kageyama:** No.

**Kageyama:** You haven’t responded in the groupchat in over a week, and I wanted to see if you were okay or needed to talk?

**Oikawa:** Thanks but no thanks, Tobio.

**Kageyama:** Okay

**Kageyama:** Well, you can call me anytime. No time is too late

**Oikawa:** God, just go away.

\--

**Oikawa:** Actually, I’m sorry. 

**Oikawa:** I think I need to break up with Hajime

**Kageyama:** Why?

**Oikawa:** So I’m staying at my mom’s place, right? Because our apartment was flooded, and everything was fine and normal, and then the last night I was there she asked me to “talk”, which is weird because my mom doesn’t communicate with me literally at all, you know?

**Kageyama:** Yeah. You used to talk to me about it all the time in middle school

**Oikawa:** Yeah, well..

**Oikawa:** You know how she is

**Oikawa:** So it was weird that she wanted to talk, but I said okay. And basically she started talking about how she doesn’t like me dating Hajime, and how it just makes her really upset

**Oikawa:** And like, I guess I don’t care, but like.. I kind of do? Like it made me really upset

**Kageyama:** You love your mom, I get it

**Kageyama:** I know you want her to be a bigger part of your life. You don’t have to explain it to me

**Oikawa:** Yeah

**Oikawa:** Anyways. She just kept going on and on, and I was crying, but then she started talking about how if I just move out and live with her, we could be like a family and everything

**Oikawa:** And that she wants to fix our bond?

**Oikawa:** I don’t know what to do

**Oikawa:** I love Hajime more than anything in the world, but I’ve always wanted her to be in my life more.

**Oikawa:** And I’m upset, and I haven’t talked to him in over a week

**Oikawa:** And he probably hates me so much right now

**Kageyama:** I don’t think he hates you, Oikawa.

**Kageyama:** Iwaizumi knows you, and he knows how you deal with things like this. He’s probably worried about you more than anything. 

**Kageyama:** It sounds kind of harsh, but if your mother really wanted to make an effort to have a relationship with you, I don’t think she should make you cut out such a huge part of your life

**Kageyama:** Iwaizumi has been there a lot more than she has. He’ll always come looking for you when you go quiet, but do you think she will? Because it kind of sounds like she’s just being really selfish and manipulative. 

**Oikawa:** Why do you sound so wise right now Tobio wtf

**Kageyama:** Idk lol

**Kageyama:** This is a lot to type, are you sure you can’t just call me?

**Oikawa:** I hate you

_ Incoming call from:  _ **_Tobio 🥺👨‍👨‍👦_ **

**\--**

**Oikawa** and  **Iwaizumi**

**Oikawa:** I’m sorry

**Oikawa:** I love you

**Oikawa:** But I understand if you don’t want to talk to me right now, or if you’re mad

**Iwaizumi:** Are you fucking kidding me?

**Iwaizumi:** I’m not mad

**Iwaizumi:** Oh my god

**Iwaizumi:** Are you okay?

**Oikawa:** No

**Iwaizumi:** Call me, please

_ Calling:  _ **_Iwa-chan 💍💙_ **

**_\--_ **

_ Suga is bout to 🤰🏻🤰🏻😤😳🤪🤪🤪 _

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ Iwaizumi Hajime heart eyes _

**Oikawa:** I realized I was in love with Iwa-chan when we were 11 years old

**Oikawa:** I was really scared of bugs, and there was one RUNNING AT ME LIKE IT WAS LITERALLY SPRINTING

**Oikawa:** And my Iwa-chan caught it and saved me

**Oikawa:** Just like he always does 

**Iwaizumi:** You’re stupid

**Oikawa:** I love you so much

**Kuroo:** OIKAWA AND IWAIZUMI 

**Kuroo:** YOU’RE BACK I’M CRYING

**Kenma:** Wow that was the longest nap I’ve ever taken in my life

**Sugawara:** OIKAWA OIKAWA OIKAWA

**Oikawa:** What?

**Sugawara:** WE MISSED YOU

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Oikawa:** Stop guys I’m crying omg

**Oikawa:** Also guys remember that talk with my mom?

**Sugawara:** Yes?? How did it go???

**Oikawa:** Horrible. I’m cutting her off teehee

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** Yeah ❤️

**Oikawa:** I don’t want to talk about it though

**Oikawa:** Ask Tobio if you want details

**Oikawa:** I’m going to go take a nap with my Iwa-chan

**Sugawara:** KAGEYAMA KAGEYAMA

**Nishinoya:** KAGEYAMA

**Tanaka:** KAGEYAMA

**Hinata:** TOBIO

**Kuroo:** KING KING

**Kageyama:** omg wtf

**Kageyama** has left the chat


	81. Literally we have so many episodes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: I’m eating my salad then sleeping goodbye forever bitch

_ Suga is bout to 🤰🏻🤰🏻😤😳🤪🤪🤪 _

**Sugawara:** So I got myself a nice salad for dinner

**Sugawara:** And I was ready to eat then just sorta pass out after because I’m tired

**Sugawara:** They forgot my dressing 🙃

**Sugawara:** I’m gonna eat a dry ass salad 🙃

**Sugawara:** What if that was a hate crime???

**Oikawa:** You’re dramatic. It was just a mistake

**Sugawara:** A hate crime*

**Sugawara:** Wait wait 

**Sugawara:** I can conjure up a quick dressing

**Kuroo:** Conjure HAHA WHAT

**Sugawara:** You’re laughing now but this is gonna be the best damn dressing ever

**Sugawara:** Update: the dressing is good

**Oikawa:** You have such boring problems

**Sugawara:** You have stupid things to say

**Oikawa:** Forever and always

**Sugawara:** I’m eating my salad then sleeping goodbye forever bitch

-

**Iwaizumi:** _ Attached Image _

**Iwaizumi:** _ Attached Image _

**Iwaizumi:** look how beautiful he is

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** You’re so beautiful and I want them all to see

**Oikawa:** IM 

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** Let me show affection in the group chat please

**Oikawa:** OMG OM G I LOVE YOU

**Iwaizumi:** _ Attached Image  _

**Iwaizumi:** _Attached Image_

**Iwaizumi:** ❤️❤️❤️

**Oikawa:** MY HEART IS SOARING RIGHT NOW IWA-CHAN HOW IS THIS HAPPENING

**Sugawara:** THATS CUTE LEAVE ME ALONE GOODBYE FOREVER BITCH

**Kageyama:** Iwaizumi is drunk omg

**Oikawa:** WHAT ARE YOU WITH HIM

**Kageyama:** Yes

**Oikawa:** WHAT WHAT WHY WASN’T I INVITED

**Kageyama:** You ignored me when I asked?

**Oikawa:** IM COMING HOME RIGHT NOW

**Sugawara:** where even were you

**Oikawa:** THE LIBRARY BUT NOW IM ON MY WAY BACK

**Kageyama:** Hinata is here too

**Oikawa:** HINATA YAY

**Hinata:** YAY

**-**

**Oikawa:** iwa-Chan iwa-Chan iwa-Chan

**Oikawa:** My brain is filled to the BRIM

**Oikawa:** ITS STUFFED WITH HAJIME

**Oikawa:** ALSO SOMEONE EXPLAIN THIS

**Oikawa:** _ Attached Image _

**Oikawa:** WE HAVE A COUCH AND CHAIRS BUT HINATA HAS NOT LEFT KAGEYAMAS LAP

**Kenma:** I JUST COUGHED UP BLOOD OMGOD OMGOMG CUTE CUTE THEYRE CUTE

**Akaashi:** Hinata is so small omg

**Kageyama:** He’s so perfect 🧡

**Hinata: 🖤**

**Sugawara:** don’t tell me 

**Sugawara:** Dont even tell me that the black heart reminds you of Kageyama

**Hinata:** it does lol it’s cute

**Sugawara:** BLOCK MY NUMBER GOODBYE FOREVER BITCH

**Kenma:** WOULD YOU STOP SAYING THAT HAHAHA

**Kageyama:** YOURE AN IDIOT HINATA WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT

**Hinata:** YOU SAID IT TOO STOP BEING MEAN

**Kageyama:** DUMBASS SHUT UP

**Hinata:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** He’s just blushing

**Kenma:** GOODBYE FOREVER BITCH

**Sugawara:** GOODBYE FOREVER BITCH

**-**

**Akaashi:** I was helping my cousin put her birthday balloons in her trunk

**Akaashi:** And she tried to close the trunk while I was still leaning in

**Akaashi:** I have been bonked

**Oikawa:** BONK

**Bokuto:** NO NO AKAASHI IS THERE A BUMP?

**Akaashi:** I don’t think so. It’s just red and kinda hurts

**Bokuto:** OH NO 

**Bokuto:** OH NO AKAASHI NO I DON’T GET OFF OF WORK UNTIL 6

**Akaashi:** I’m okay lol it’s not an emergency 

**Akaashi:** I was just embarrassed and it was kinda funny 

**Bokuto:** IM SO WORRIED

**Akaashi:** lol I’m fine Bokuto 💗💗

**Bokuto:** 💓💓!!! I’ll see you when I’m off of work?

**Akaashi:** of course!

**Kuroo:** Just get married and move in together and have three kids and name them all after me

**Akaashi:** no 😍

**Kuroo:** Goodbye forever bitch

-

**Hinata:** Is Kageyama not home?

**Kageyama:** No am I supposed to be?

**Hinata:** YES BECAUSE IM OUTSIDE

**Kageyama:** STUPID YOU DIDNT TELL ME ARE YOU AN IDIOT

**Kageyama:** ITS SO COLD OUT YOURE STUPID IM OUT FOR A JOG

**Kageyama:** I'M RUNNING BACK OMG

**Oikawa:** RUN KAGEYAMA GO GO

**Tsukishima:** idiot

**Tsukishima:** I thought we all knew he goes on his jogs at this time

**Hinata:** it’s not my fault I was craving him 

**Tsukishima:** what

**Hinata:** I’m craving him so I had to come over right when I got up

**Tsukishima:** you’re weird

**Hinata:** ITS NORMAL

**Yamaguchi:** I’m craving Tsukki 

**Tsukishima:** what

**Yamaguchi:** I’m craving Tsukki

**Bokuto:** IM CRAVING AKAASHI

**Tanaka:** I’m craving Kiyoko

**Oikawa:** I’m craving Iwa-Chan

**Kuroo:** I’m craving Kenma’s a💲💲

**Kenma:** die 😍

**Nishinoya:** I’m craving Asahi’s dℹ️ck

**Asahi:** noya

**Sugawara:** I’m craving Daichi’s cuⓂ️

**Daichi:** I knew you were gonna contribute but out of everything why that

**Sugawara:** it’s a craving 🥰

**Yamaguchi:** Daichi better deliver

**Tanaka:** Asahi better deliver

**Oikawa:** Kenma better deliver

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA IM FREEZING OUT HERE

**Kageyama:** I’m about to walk up the stairs

**Hinata:** you’re gonna have to cuddle me to warm me up

**Kageyama:** okay

**Hinata:** you’re gonna have to kiss me to warm me up

**Kageyama:** okay

**Hinata:** you’re gonna have to give me a hoodie to warm me up

**Kageyama:** omg okay whatever just hurry up and come inside dumbass

**Kenma:** Kageyama fuck him to warm him up

**Kuroo:** Kageyama eat his ass to warm him up

**Sugawara:** Um this is my son you’re talking about

**Kenma:** oh oh sorry 

**Kenma:** Kageyama f*ck him to warm him up

**Kuroo:** Kageyama eat his a** to warm him up

**Sugawara:** 🙃🙃

**Kageyama:** no

**-**

**Nishinoya:** Asahi looks

**Nishinoya:** SO HOT RN

**Nishinoya:** WHY WHY WHY ASAHI

**Nishinoya:** my mouth is WATERING 

**Nishinoya:** literally DRIPPING

**Nishinoya:** So is my… 

**Nishinoya:** 😼😼✌🏼👀👀💦

**Kuroo:** There’s no point in talking about it if you aren’t gonna show us

**Kuroo:** SHOW US ASAHI NOT YOUR 😼😼✌🏼👀👀💦

**Nishinoya:** _ Attached Image  _

**Nishinoya:** THAT MAN BUN

**Nishinoya:** THE WHITE T-SHIRT

**Nishinoya:** THE SHORTS THAT STOP WAY BEFORE THE KNEES

**Nishinoya:** AND HES COOKING

**Kuroo:** SO SIMPLE YET SO OMG

**Nishinoya:** UGHHHH

**Sugawara:** The way that Kuroo is thirsty for everyone’s boyfriend

**Kuroo:** Tell Kiyoko that her man is next 😠😈😈

**Tanaka:** 😈😈😼

**Nishinoya:** Omg Asahi is so

**Nishinoya:** So tall

**Oikawa:** wut

**Kenma:** We been knew?

**Nishinoya:** He’s so tall and so sweet omg

**Nishinoya:** Asahi my sweet handsome asahiii

**Oikawa:** Are you horny or not???

**Nishinoya:** I’m 🥺🥺🥺 🥰🥰

**Oikawa:** can you make up your mind? Like what

**Nishinoya:** He’s so cute my sweet gentle tall handsome Asahi I want to feel his strong arms around me 🥺🥺🥺

**Asahi:** are you okay??

**Nishinoya:** my lovely sweet handsome tall strong Asahi come hug me

**Asahi:** Lol okay??

**Tanaka:** NOYA WHAT AHAH

**Nishinoya:** Can’t talk, I’m getting forehead kisses 🥰🥰🥰🥺


	82. head empty just the fucking outro to banana fish like wut why is in there it's making me sad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama: Shut up  
> Kageyama: Shutup  
> Kageyama: You’re so cute  
> Kageyama: Shouyou  
> Kageyama: Omg

_ Iwaizumi Hajime heart eyes _

**Kenma:** Kuro has such pretty eyelashes

**Sugawara:** Ew

**Kenma:** Don’t ew me

**Kenma:** Sorry that he’s more beautiful than u and u have problems accepting it (｀▽´)

**Sugawara:** Bitch

**Hinata:** It’s 4am

**Kenma:** Yeah thanks Shouyou I can read clocks 

**Sugawara:** LMFAO

**Kenma:** So no one asked but Kuro went to bed FOREVER ago because he has work in a few hours, and like I’m up playing a game on the couch

**Kenma:** But I think around like 12, he came out of our room wrapped in a blanket and like layed on the couch and pulled me super close to him because he wanted to cuddle. And he basically buried his face in my hair and then passed out again

**Kenma:** And tbh I think I’m going to try and stay up until his alarm goes off just because I want the rush of him being mad at me and aggressively taking care of me

**Sugawara:** me me me 

**Kenma:** And I died in my game SO I TURNED TO LOOK AT HIM BECAUSE HE’S JUST BEEN ASLEEP AND I LOVE LOOKING AT HIM

**Kenma:** And like

**Kenma:** Idk

**Kenma:** idk idk idk

**Kenma:** He’s so beautiful

**Kenma:** His eyelashes are so pretty

**Kenma:** His hair is so pretty

**Kenma:** His lips are so pretty

**Kenma:** Ew i’m going to kiss him

**Sugawara:** Don’t wake him up if he has work soon!! Let him sleep!!   
**Kenma:** SUGA I AM GOING TO DIE

**Kenma:** I NEED TO KISS HIM

**Sugawara:** DON’T DON’T

**Kenma:** HE ALWAYS WAKES ME UP BY KISSING ME

**Sugawara:** Do you have a job that you have to wake up early for?

**Kenma:** I don’t have a job periodt bitch i’m a full time college student

**Hinata:** Me af

**Kenma:** Thanks for the input Shou

**Kenma:** BUT ANYWAYS SUGA I NEED TO

**Sugawara:** You can WAIT A FEW HOURS YOU IDIOT FREAK

**Sugawara:** Anyways I’m going to kiss Daichi and wake him up because I can ❤️

**Kenma:** Suga I hate you

-

**Kenma:** It’s 7:29

**Kenma:** Kuro’s alarm goes off in ONE MINUTE

**Kenma:** OH HERE WE GO TIME TO KISS HIM TIME TO KISS HIM 

**Kenma:** Oh he’s mad at me for being awake 🥰😼

**Kenma:** Time to put on the Charm

**Oikawa:** You have charm?

**Kenma:** Yes

**Oikawa:** That sounds fake

**Kuroo:** It’s not

**Kuroo:** Oh god

**Kuroo:** HE’S SO CUTE

**Kuroo:** I have to kiss him until he falls asleep

**Oikawa:** Don’t, you have WORK

**Kuroo:** THIS IS MORE IMPORTANT

**Oikawa:** NO IT ISN’T

**Oikawa:** KUROO

**Oikawa:** KUROO GO TO WORK

-

**Kuroo:** So I was late to work

**Akaashi:** KUROO

**Kuroo:** LISTEN

**Kuroo:** Kenma fell asleep kind of quickly BUT THEN I WAS SO COMFORTABLE

**Kuroo:** LIKE HE SMELLS SO GOOD AND IT FEELS SO NICE TO JUST BE NEXT TO HIM IN BED

**Kuroo:** AND I FELL ASLEEP

**Oikawa:** IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT

**Kuroo:** SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** I’M OMW THERE RIGHT NOW

**Oikawa:** IT’S 10AM. YOU’RE SO LATE

**Kuroo:** SHUT UP

\--

**Akaashi:** I’m about to have a breakdown.

**Sugawara:** Oh no!!!!! Why????

**Akaashi:** KAGEYAMA

**Kageyama:** What?

**Akaashi:** WHAT KIND OF MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO?

**Akaashi:** I THOUGHT ABOUT IT FOR SOME REASON AND NOW I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT FOR AN HOUR BECAUSE I JUST

**Akaashi:** MY MIND IS BLANK LIKE I DON'T EVEN HAVE IDEAS

**Kuroo:** Kageyama, do you listen to girl in red? 😻😹🥰

**Kageyama:** I don’t know who that is, sorry

**Kuroo:** Oh no 😢

**Kenma:** Idiot

**Kuroo:** HI KENMA BABY

**Kenma:** ...Idiot

**Kageyama:** I kind of just listen to everything

**Kageyama:** Like I can like anything

**Kageyama:** I usually listen to whatever Shouyou puts on

**Kageyama:** Because I don’t care that much

**Hinata:** OMG HE REALLY LIKES DOJA CAT

**Kageyama:** Shut up

**Hinata:** No

**Hinata:** I have a playlist that’s literally just called Tobio because it’s made up of songs that he always gets excited to hear

**Kageyama:** Shut up

**Kageyama:** Shutup

**Kageyama:** You’re so cute

**Kageyama:** Shouyou

**Kageyama:** Omg

**Sugawara:** I’m about to have a heart attack

**Kenma:** ME TOO ME TOO ME TOO

**Kenma:** Wait Shouyou does that mean you have two kageyama playlists?

**Kageyama:** WHAT

**Hinata:** Kenma I hate you

**Kenma:** ????????!!!!!!!!

**Kenma:** I have a Kuro playlist it ISN’T DEEP

**Sugawara:** I have a daichi playlist!!

**Yamaguchi:** I have a Tsukki one

**Tsukishima:** Ew

**Hinata:** I haven’t showed that one to him yet

**Hinata:** It’s embarrassing 

**Sugawara:** Omg what’s on it

**Hinata:** Just.. 

**Hinata:** love songs that make me think of him

**Hinata:** IT’S EMBARRASSING

**Kenma:** IT ISN’T

**Kageyama:** I want to hear it, idiot!!

**Hinata:** No

**Nishinoya:** Kageyama 

**Nishinoya:** Fuck him and maybe he’ll say yes 

**Nishinoya:** 😉

**Kageyama:** No

**Hinata:** No

-

**Sugawara:** GYUS

**Sugawara:** GUYS

**Kageyama:** How did you spell that inside out

**Sugawara:** I don’t know what that means

**Sugawara:** ANYWAYS

**Sugawara:** I JUST REALIZED 

**Sugawara:** THAT THAT SONG THAT’S POPULAR ON TIK TOK

**Sugawara:** YOU KNOW THE

**Sugawara:** KITTY YOU BETTER NOT BE DEAD IF SOMEONE HIT YOU WITH THEIR CAR I’LL CHOP OFF THEIR HEAD

**Kenma:** Omg i fucking hate that song

**Kuroo:** i love it

**Kenma:** I know, it’s annoying

**Sugawara:** ANYWAYS WHATEVER

**Sugawara:** I JUST FOUND OUT SHE’S THE SAME GIRL WHO SINGS THAT GUCCI GUCCI SONG

**Hinata:** Ew Kageyama loves that song 

**Akaashi:** OMG OMG OMG

**Asahi:** The what?

**Oikawa:** GUCCI GUCCI LOUIS LOUIS FENDI FENDI PRADA THEM BASIC BITCHES WEAR THAT SHIT SO I DON’T EVEN BOTHER

**Oikawa:** I PUT THAT ON MY PARTNER, I PUT THAT ON MY FAMILY, OAKLAND CITY REPRESENT ADDRESS ME AS YOUR MAJESTY 

**Oikawa:** YEAH YOU CAN KISS THE RING BUT YOU CAN’T EVER TOUCH THE CROWN I SMOKE A MILLION SWISHER BLUNTS AND I AIN'T EVER COMING DOWN

**Oikawa:** BITCH YOU AIN’T NO BARBIE I SEE YOU WORK AT ARBY'S NUMBER TWO SUPER-SIZED HURRY UP I’M STARVING

**Iwaizumi:** Okay that’s enough

**Sugawara:** THAT SONG

**Asahi:** I’ve never heard either of those songs in my life

**Sugawara:** _ attached link _

**Sugawara:** _ attached link _

**Sugawara:** Culture yourself, freak

**Daichi:** SUGA HAHA

**Asahi:** 😧

  
  


**\--**

**Oikawa:** _ attached link _

**Oikawa:** Oh shit

**Oikawa:** Oh no

**Oikawa:** Teehee no one open that unless ur Iwa-chan

**Iwaizumi:** Are you sure that’s the one you saw? 

**Oikawa:** Yes Iwa-chan!! I was looking for it for hours!

**Iwaizumi:** Okay

**Kageyama:** I’m so good at self control wow

**Kageyama:** That’s such a clickable link

**Kageyama:** Right there

**Kageyama:** And look at me not clicking it

**Sugawara:** Omg lol

**Sugawara:** Oikawa how are you so bad at sending things to the groupchat?

**Asahi:** At this point I think we’re cursed

**Oikawa:** Well, everyone already saw my nudes so there’s nothing more embarrassing than that

**Oikawa:** BUT STILL OMG DON’T CLICK IT

**Kuroo:** HAHA I CLICKED IT

**Oikawa:** KUROO

**Kuroo:** It’s okay I won’t tell everyone in the chat that you and Iwaizumi are buying a remote control vibrator 

**Kuroo:** That would be so mean of me

**Sugawara:** OMG OMG

**Oikawa:** KUROO WHY

**Kuroo:** NEXT TIME DOUBLE CHECK THE CHAT IDIOT

**Iwaizumi:** I TELL HIM THAT ALL THE TIME AND HE JUST DOESN’T

**Sugawara:** Oooh Daichi, that one’s actually pretty cheap!

**Sugawara:** You know my birthday is coming up…

**Daichi:** No. Stop

**Sugawara:** BUT THERE’S A PINK ONE

**Daichi:** NO

**Sugawara:** IWAIZUMI BOUGHT ONE FOR OIKAWA

**Daichi:** I’M NOT IWAIZUMI

**Sugawara:** YEAH UNFORTUNATELY 

**Daichi:** WHAT DOES THAT MEAN

**Sugawara:** IDK USE YOUR BRAIN

**Oikawa:** WHAT IS HAPPENING


	83. I almost used all of my ideas here so I kept rewriting it so I only used a few so I can share the wealth with my other episodes also I didn’t proof read but that’s fine it’s fine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: I miss Suga
> 
> Kuroo: Where is he
> 
> Kuroo: I want to rustle his jimmies

_ Iwaizumi Hajime heart eyes _

**Hinata:** ignore my fugly nature

**Hinata:** but I look so tall in this picture

**Hinata:** like 85 days long

**Tsukishima:** 85 days long?

**Sugawara:** You actually do look tall woah

**Hinata:** I wish I was

**Hinata:** 107 days long

**Kageyama:** what are you even saying? That's not a height

**Kageyama:** And why do you want to be tall what

**Hinata:** I need that

**Kenma:** shut up Shouyou. You don’t need it

**Hinata:** no no no

**Hinata:** imagine me

**Hinata:** but tall OMGOMG 

**Kenma:** you’re so stupid

**Hinata:** Why wasn’t I CHOSEN TO BE TALL I WANT TO CRY

**Kenma:** omg

**Kageyama:** I think your height suits you 

**Hinata:** noooo

**Kageyama:** yes

**Hinata:** no

**Kageyama:** yes

**Hinata:** no

**Kageyama:** YES DUMBASS OMG

**Hinata:** don’t yell at me😧.. I’m fragile right now

**Hinata:** you should be hugging me and telling me it’s alright

**Kageyama:** maybe if it wasn’t about something stupid I would

**Tsukishima:** lol

**Hinata:** My own boyfriend doesn’t love me

**Yamaguchi:** damn same

**Tsukishima:** What are you talking about

**Yamaguchi:** my boyfriend stopped loving me

**Yamaguchi:** I’ve been so lonely all day

**Yamaguchi:** he hasn’t told me my sweater looks cute

**Yamaguchi:** he hasn’t told me my freckles are cute

**Yamaguchi:** and he hasn’t given me any KISSES TODAY

**Tsukishima:** I haven’t seen you today

**Yamaguchi:** And what are we going to do about that?

**Tsukishima:** I’m coming over in like an hour. You knew this

**Yamaguchi:** you cant even make time for your boyfriend?!

**Tsukishima:** We literally made plans.

**Yamaguchi:** The love of your life?!

**Yamaguchi:** your best friend??!

**Tsukishima:** really?

**Tsukishima:** I’m sure you look very cute

**Tsukishima:** you always do

**Yamaguchi:** omg

**Tsukishima:** And you already know that I love your freckles

**Yamaguchi:** omgomgomg

**Yamaguchi:** I JSUTW AVWHQH

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI YOURE SO CUTE I LOVE YOU

**Tsukishima:** stop that you’re the one who wanted attention

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI TSUKKI TSUKKI I LOVE YOU

**Tsukishima:** stop

**Yamaguchi:** KEI KEI

**Tsukishima:** shut up

**Tsukishima:** please

**Yamaguchi:** KEI I LOVE YOU PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

**Tsukishima:** I love you too

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI

**Tsukishima:** shut up

**Bokuto:** HAHAHA TSUKKI JUST LOVE YOUR BOYFRIEND

**Tsukishima:** I do but he doesn’t have to be embarrassing 

**Kuroo:** JUST LOVE HIM TSUKKI

**Tsukishima** left the group

**Kageyama** added  **Tsukishima** to the group

**Kageyama:** stay here

**Tsukishima:** Tobio you piss me off sometimes

**-**

**Daichi** and  **Sugawara:**

**Daichi:** I really want a dog

**Sugawara:** A PUPPY

**Daichi:** yes

**Sugawara:** Something about a man going on runs with his dog is so 🤤🤤

**Daichi:** really?

**Sugawara:** like you care about fitness and animals that’s so 🤤🤤 of you

**Sugawara:** omg

**Sugawara:** Daichi with a dog omg that’s amazing

**Sugawara:** Daichi get a dog. Actually make it two

**Sugawara:** three dogs! Daichi get four dogs

**Daichi:** I’ll get one once I live in a bigger place lol

**Sugawara:** Daichi wait omg

**Sugawara:** my lease is up soon right

**Sugawara:** What if we

**Sugawara:** looked into places together? I mean we spend a lot of time together already!

**Sugawara:** And we go to the same school so our main worry would be finding a place convenient to your work because you work away from campus!

**Sugawara:** and it could be cheaper because it’s two of us in one room and we have two incomes!

**Sugawara:** we can even get just a small place and make it work

**Sugawara:** and a puppy of course

**Sugawara:** Just us and a puppy!

**Sugawara:** And Kageyama can visit us easier because our schedules would be better to work with if we’re in the same place!

**Sugawara:** We can force Tsukki over too

**Sugawara:** We can hold team dinners comfortably

**Sugawara:** unless you don’t want to

**Sugawara:** I know it’s a big step so I understand

**Sugawara:** I won’t be upset if you don’t 🤗

**Daichi:** I was actually gonna ask you that when you came over this weekend lol

**Daichi:** I want to live with you!

**Daichi:** I’ve been dreaming about it since we started college honestly lol

**Daichi:** but I didn’t want to rush things and freak you out haha

**Daichi:** I want you to be the last thing I see before sleeping and the first thing I see when I wake up

**Daichi:** I want to give you goodnight and goodmorning kisses

**Daichi:** I want to have lazy weekends with you

**Daichi:** I want to come home to you every day

**Daichi:** We can have both of our families over for holidays instead of doing half days at each house

**Sugawara:** Daichi omg stop my heart is gonna explode

**Sugawara:** Okay okay. Wanna start looking when you come over? The sooner we get a place the sooner we can get to shopping for house stuff

**Sugawara:** omg omg two toothbrushes in our bathroom Daichi🥺🥺

**Sugawara:** people will come over and see both of our toothbrushes!!!!! Just sitting there!!! Cause we live together

**Daichi:** You’re excited for the toothbrushes? Lol

**Sugawara:** I’m excited to sleep in my Daichi’s arms every night

**Daichi:** lmaoo I’m excited too

**Daichi:** we can look at puppies together

**Sugawara:** Daichiiii

**Sugawara:** I wanna see you right now. I'm so happy. I just wanna hug you. Can I come over?

**Daichi:** Can I go over there instead? I don’t want you walking over here when it's so dark and cold

**Sugawara:** YES ANYTHING I JUST NEED TO SEE YOU AND KISS YOUR HANDSOME FACE!! SLEEP OVER PLEASE

**Daichi:** okay lol Let me get my bag together and I’ll be right over

**Sugawara:** 😚

**Daichi:** 😚❤️

**-**

_ Iwaizumi Hajime heart eyes _

**Kuroo:** I’m in the mood for winning a competition

**Daichi:** okay?

**Kuroo:** Kenma is the cutest here

**Kuroo:** when we haven’t seen each other on our busy days he just sits on my lap so I can hug him and watch him play video games 

**Kuroo:** and he’ll turn and look at me every once in a while so I can give him a kiss and then he goes back to playing

**Kuroo:** I just wanna hug him right now but he’s in class

**Daichi:** very cute

**Daichi:** but

**Daichi:** Suga’s hands get cold so easily so he doesn’t like to use them too much in the winter until he’s fully warmed up

**Kuroo:** so he uses his mouth instead? 😼😼

**Daichi:** I’m telling you something cute we can talk about that another time

**Kuroo:** oh sorry

**Daichi:** He’ll come over and wrap himself in his favorite blanket. And we’ll sit at the table and I’ll feed him and he gives me little kisses as thanks

**Kenma:** EVERYTIME HES COLD

**Daichi:** yes

**Kenma:** SHUT UP SHUT UP THATS CUTE SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** That’s cute as fuck I hate you

**Iwaizumi:** Well, Oikawa gets really needy when he’s tired and wants all of my attention

**Iwaizumi:** I mean he’s like that all the time but he’s super cuddly when he’s tired

**Iwaizumi:** So on my days off he just comes into the room after he showers and lays on top of me and just gives me kisses until he falls asleep on my chest

**Kuroo:** The mental image of that

**Kuroo:** it’s too much for me

**Tsukishima:** I buy Yamaguchi flowers a lot. He saves at least one before they die and presses them and he has a little book for it. And there’s pictures of us from the day I gave them to him

**Kenma:** I need to see this book YAMAGUCHI I NEED TO SEE THIS BOOK

**Tsukishima:** no

**Yamaguchi:** Aw Tsukki you think that’s cute?

**Tsukishima:** yeah, why else would I buy you so many flowers

**Yamaguchi:** awawwawwawaw im gonna cryyyyy

**Tsukishima:** shut up lol

**Kageyama:** Hinata still gets shy whenever we kiss. It’s so cute because like, sometimes I just want to see his reaction. So I’ll randomly lean over and kiss him and he’ll stare at me for a little before his face gets so red. And like, he’ll cover his face when I laugh but it’s so cute and I just want to kiss him more. He blushes so much when he just kisses my cheek

**Kageyama:** And he’s bad at taking initiative because he gets so flustered. So sometimes he'll pull on my shirt and tell me what he wants quietly. He’s so cute when he’s shy omg

**Kenma:** THIS THIS THIS THIS

**Bokuto:** Well I think Akaashi is the cutest because he loves taking long baths with me

**Bokuto:** Like he lights candles and uses cool soap and it smells so good and he looks so pretty and then we get out and all he wants to do is cuddle and talk about his day. And he likes to play with my hands and kiss my fingers

**Kenma:** I literally want to hug Akaashi so bad SO BAD SO BAD

**Asahi:** Nishinoya is just always cute. Like he’s full of energy but some days he’s so lazy and just wants to lay in bed with me and Suzu all day.

**Asahi:** When I get up he follows me around and carries her with him. He won’t sit down until I pet her chin and give him however many kisses he wants

**Nishinoya:** ONE IS NEVER ENOUGH

**Asahi:** Apparently 10 isn’t either

**Nishinoya:** MORE I NEED MORE

**Asahi:** You’re not even here

**Nishinoya:** I CAN BE

**Asahi:** go to class and then come over after lol

**Nishinoya:** 💔💔💔 fine

**Kuroo:** Well I wanted to flex my cute Kenma but then everyone else gave stories and just spit on me and showed that I wasn’t special

**Kuroo:** Even though I know Kenma is the cutest but we’ll do this another time

**Kuroo:** I miss Suga

**Kuroo:** Where is he

**Kuroo:** I want to rustle his jimmies

**Kenma:** you’re so weird

**Daichi:** Kuroo what

**Daichi:** He’s studying right now lol he’ll probably be on his phone in an hour

**Kuroo:** No I want his attention and I want it now

**Kuroo:** wait omg

**Kuroo:** Daichi Daichi Daichi

**Kuroo:** if me and Kenma broke up and I wanted to get back together with you, would you take me back?

**Sugawara:** no 😋

**Daichi:** no

**Kuroo:** IT WORKED I SUMMONED HIM

**Sugawara:** Kuroo I’ll kick your ass

**Sugawara:** Daichiiii can I come see you? I’m running out of energy

**Sugawara:** I need my Daichi’s love to wake me up

**Daichi:** That’s

**Daichi:** embarrassing

**Daichi:** but yeah come over

**Sugawara:** thank god cause I’m already outside teehee 😇

**Daichi:** omg

**Kuroo:** Suga what if I told you that I never loved Daichi. I just did it to get your attention

**Sugawara:** I’d say ew bitch

**Kenma:** stop trying to steal boyfriends idiot


	84. This but it's the end of the halloween episode where karou is like "one day hikaru will wanep on his own" and everyone on anime tik tok is just crying so hard even though it's not that dramatic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: Was that to prove a point?
> 
> Tsukishima: Yes
> 
> Tsukishima: And my point is that my boyfriend and I are cuter than you and that embarrassing idiot.

_ Iwaizumi Hajime Heart Eyes _

**Kuroo:** GUYS

**Kuroo:** GUYS

**Kuroo:** GUYS

**Kuroo:** GUYS

**Bokuto:** WHAT

**Daichi:** Oh my god what

**Kuroo:** I’M DYING

**Sugawara:** Good

**Akaashi:** Why are you dying?

**Kuroo:** Sugawara Koushi you’re so rude

**Kuroo:** I can’t believe MY DAICHI is with you

**Sugawara:** YOUR DAICHI

**Kuroo:** ANYWAYS I JUST GOT HOME FROM WORK

**Kuroo:** AND KENMA

**Kuroo:** HAS HIS EARS PIERCED??????

**Kuroo:** I’M GOING TO DIE

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** LOOK AT HIM

**Sugawara:** OMG OMG HE’S CUTE

**Oikawa:** … HE’S HOT

**Kuroo:** I KNOW

**Akaashi:** Kenma heart eyes heart eyes

**Akaashi:** I want to get my ears pierced

**Kenma:** I’ll pierce them for you!!!

**Akaashi:** I’d rather ...not

**Kenma:** You can say you hate me in the chat Akaashi, it’s ok

**Akaashi:** I hate you

**Kenma:** I knew it

**Akaashi:** Good.

**Akaashi:** Come over and get high with me

**Kenma:** Okay

**Kuroo:** NOOOOOO

**Kuroo:** KENMA YOU CAN’T LEAVE

**Kuroo:** KENMA KENMA KENMA

**Daichi:** You’re so clingy

**Kuroo:** HIS EARS ARE PIERCED 

**Daichi:** Literally so what

**Kuroo:** YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND ME DAICHI

**Kenma:** Omg calm down

**Kenma:** You have a day off tomorrow, I’ll hang out with you then

**Kuroo:** I NEVER SEE YOU

**Kuroo:** YOU HATE ME

**Akaashi:** You literally live with him

**Kuroo:** IT’S NOT ENOUGH

**Kageyama:** I live another fifty years

**Sugawara:** It’s not enough

**Kageyama:** I interview every soldier who fought by your side

**Kuroo:** NO NO NO

**Kageyama:** She tells our story ❤️

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Kageyama:** I try to make sense of your thousands of pages of writing

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Kageyama:** You really do write like you’re running out of time 🥺

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Kageyama:** I rely on Angelica, while she’s alive we tell your story 😢

**Kuroo:** KENMA KENMA KENMA

**Kenma:** Omg why are you like this?

**Kenma:** Akaashi give me like two hours and then I’ll be over 

**Akaashi:** I think Bokuto wanted to come over, so you can always just bring Kuroo with lol

**Kenma:** Nice

**Kuroo:** YES

**Kenma:** ..It’ll still be like an hour or so

**Nishinoya:** Oh? Kuroo bout to fuck?

**Kenma:** He looks so good today ( ･`ω･´)

**Hinata:** (*´_ゝ｀)

**Kenma:** Shouyou what is that supposed to even mean

**Hinata:** Idk

**Kenma:** I despise you

**Hinata:** (*´_ゝ｀)

**Yamaguchi** changed the group name to  _ (*´_ゝ｀) _

\--

**Akaashi:** Um

**Akaashi:** Okay so this is embarrassing

**Kenma:** Your existence is embarrassing

**Akaashi:** Thx

**Kenma:** Np

**-**

**Akaashi:** I JUST REALIZED I DIDN’T EVEN SAY ANYTHING

**Akaashi:** And you all just LET ME GO

**Akaashi:** YOU ALL JUST LET ME NOT BE EMBARRASSING FOR AN HOUR

**Akaashi:** I hate all of you

**Akaashi:** Except Suga and Kageyama

**Sugawara:** Awww!!

**Kageyama:** Thank you.

**Akaashi:** Anyways okay so like it’s hot outside right

**Sugawara:** Right

**Akaashi:** And I have to go to my parent’s house right

**Sugawara:** Right

**Akaashi:** And I don’t want to overheat right

**Kageyama:** Right

**Akaashi:** So I was going to wear shorts right

**Sugawara:** Right

**Kenma:** Why is this build up taking a million years

**Akaashi:** Shut UP kenma

**Akaashi:** ANYWAYS I WANT TO WEAR SHORTS

**Akaashi:** TO MY PARENT’S HOUSE

**Akaashi:** EXCEPT I 

**Akaashi:** HAVE RUGBURN ON MY KNEES

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA

**Sugawara:** Just flaunt it

**Akaashi:** Literally why would I do that

**Sugawara:** Be proud 

**Akaashi:** NO??

**Nishinoya:** Omg Bokuto fucks???

**Bokuto:** His mouth yeah 😎

**Nishinoya:** YESSS

**Kuroo:** YESSS

**Akaashi:** STOP.

**Akaashi:** I’M WEARING JEANS I’M WEARING JEANS IT WAS A MISTAKE TO ASK FOR ADVICE

**Akaashi:** I’ll just overheat and die

**Akaashi:** That’s the only solution

**Oikawa:** Just say you fucking fell on the concrete you idiot

**Akaashi:** Wait omg

**Akaashi:** Omg

**Akaashi:** I’M STUPID

**Akaashi** has left the chat

**Bokuto:** I think he’s embarrassed 

  
  


\--

**Hinata:** I’m leaving Tobio for his sister

**Sugawara:** WUT

**Oikawa:** Why?

**Hinata:** I’M OBSESSED WITH HER

**Kageyama:** SHUT UP IDIOT

**Hinata:** NO

**Sugawara:** This is cute I think

**Daichi:** It definitely isn’t

**Hinata:** I was talking to Miwa right

**Hinata:** And she was talking about how Tobio used to be this really awkward and mean looking kid right

**Akaashi:** That sounds rude, I’m sure he was perfect

**Hinata:** Exactly

**Hinata:** Omg interjection 

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** Look at him

**Akaashi:** Round lil face!!!

**Sugawara:** I’m about to fall over and die DAICHI DAICHI DAICHI

**Daichi:** SUGA SUGA SUGA

**Sugawara:** OUR SON OUR SON

**Daichi:** OUR SON

**Oikawa:** Ew he’s cute

**Hinata:** RIGHT 

**Hinata:** Anyways 

**Hinata:** Apparently there were a group of teenagers around Miwa’s age that would like??? Just be mean to Tobio all the time?? Because they thought he was ugly?? 

**Akaashi:** NOOOOO

**Hinata:** AND SHE BEAT ALL OF THEM UP???

**Hinata:** LIKE SHE SAID SHE GOT IN SO MANY FIGHTS BECAUSE SOMEONE WOULD JUST SAY SOMETHING ABOUT TOBIO AND SHE WOULD KICK THEIR BUTTS??

**Sugawara:** AS SHE SHOULD AS SHE SHOULD

**Daichi:** YES

**Kageyama:** Omg

**Kageyama:** Shouyou stop yelling

**Kageyama:** It’s literally not a big deal

**Hinata:** NOOO I’M IN LOVE WITH HER

**Kageyama:** Stop idiot

**Sugawara:** Wow 

**Sugawara:** KAGEYAMA WAIT THAT HAPPENED TO YOU????

**Kageyama:** Yes

**Kageyama:** It’s fine, I literally didn’t know it happened until she told me a few years ago

**Hinata:** I’ll beat them up 

**Kageyama:** It was forever ago

**Hinata:** I’ll beat them up

**Kageyama:** I didn’t even know it happened. I was unbothered af

**Hinata:** I’ll still beat them up

**Iwaizumi:** af

**Sugawara:** af

**Oikawa:** af

**Kageyama:** Omg. Shouyou you’re an idiot

**Asahi:** Does no one else exist to you two in this chat?

**Hinata:** I love you

**Kageyama:** I love you more, stupid

**Asahi:** ???!?!!?!??!?!

**Kageyama:** Stop talking to my annoying sister and go on a run with me

**Hinata:** Okay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Yamaguchi:** Omg

**Yamaguchi:** You made my phone go off in class

**Yamaguchi:** A MILLION TIMES

**Yamaguchi:** I want to kill you all

**Oikawa:** teehee

\--

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** I BRAIDED KENMA’S HAIR!!!

**Kuroo:** HOW DOES IT LOOK?

**Oikawa:** Wowwww

**Oikawa:** It looks so… so good

**Kenma:** Idk why there’s an ellipses there, I’ll kill you

**Kenma:** It looks great, baby

**Sugawara:** Amazing!! You did so good!!!

**Daichi:** It looks nice I guess

**Kenma:** Not you guess

**Daichi:** IT LOOKS SO NICE KUROO

**Kageyama:** Nice!! :-)

**Tsukishima:** It looks like shit

**Kuroo:** TSUKKI

**Tsukishima:** It’s falling out at the sides

**Kuroo:** TSUKKI YOU’RE SO MEAN

**Kenma:** Tsukishima, I’m going to kill you

**Tsukishima:** Wow. I’m terrified

**Tsukishima:** How tall are you again?

**Kenma:** I’LL KILL YOU

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI HAHA

**Kuroo:** Kittennnn it’s fine, I’ll just rebraid it since it looks bad :-)

**Kenma:** Kuro you know you’re bad at braiding hair

**Kenma:** It’ll just look the same

**Kuroo:** Yeah but I know you like when I play with your hair

**Tsukishima:** Kenma I love that you’re just okay with letting him be embarrassing to you in the chat

**Kenma:** Tsukishima I love that all you know how to do is ignore your boyfriend in the chat to be passive aggressive instead

**Yamaguchi:** HAHAHA

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi!!!

**Yamaguchi:** Sorry Tsukki

**Tsukishima:** Lol 

**Tsukishima:** Don’t apologize

**Tsukishima:** Have you eaten dinner yet?

**Yamaguchi:** Nope!

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi!!

**Yamaguchi:** I was waiting for you!!!! 

**Tsukishima:** I’ll bring something on my way over

**Yamaguchi:** I love you!! Can you bring me tea!! 🥺

**Tsukishima:** Of course, I’m already walking to get some

**Yamaguchi:** I LOVE YOU

**Tsukishima:** I love you too 💚

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki give me a MILLION KISSES when you get here 💛

**Tsukishima:** Okay 💚

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki GIVE ME A MILLION HUGS 💛

**Tsukishima:** Okay 💚

**Yamaguchi:** bring me flowers? 🥺💛

**Tsukishima:** Okay 💚

**Sugawara:** THE HEARTS THE HEARTS THE HEARTS

**Kenma:** Was that to prove a point?

**Tsukishima:** Yes

**Tsukishima:** And my point is that my boyfriend and I are cuter than you and that embarrassing idiot.

**Kuroo:** HEY


	85. This but nothing happens because my brain isn't letting me think of anything other than "arara gomen" it's literally a fucking wall that I can't penetrate. It's the iron wall of Dateko but it's just "Arara gomen"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: omw
> 
> Kuroo: SUGA NO
> 
> Kuroo: I’LL DIE WITHOUT HIM

_ (*´_ゝ｀) _

**Akaashi:** I got new glasses

**Akaashi:** and I’m so sad because I don’t think they look good

**Bokuto:** no no they look great

**Akaashi:** no they look horrible

**Akaashi:** idk I might return them

**Akaashi:** _ Attached Image _

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI IM SAVING THIS PICTURE YOU LOOK SO CUTE

**Akaashi:** Ew no I look terrible

**Bokuto:** NO YOU’RE SO 🥰🥰🥰

**Kenma:** KEEP THEM KEEP THEM

**Oikawa:** DO NOT RETURN THEM

**Kageyama:** me and Hinata think they look nice on you

**Bokuto:** SEE THEY LOOK GOOD

**Bokuto:** I TOLD YOU AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** maybe I just need to get used to the new look idk

**Bokuto:** YES KEEP THEM 

**Akaashi:** Fine

**Bokuto:** YAY

**-**

**Sugawara:** DAICHI DAICHI DAICHI

**Sugawara:** And everyone else

**Sugawara:** BUT MAINLY DAICHI BECAUSE HE COMFORTED ME AS I CRIED BECAUSE I WAS STRESSED

**Sugawara:** I GOT AN A ON MY ESSAY AND AN A ON MY TEST TODAY

**Daichi:** Aw good job baby!!

**Sugawara:** I’m so happy omg I’m gonna take a nap when I’m back at my place! I’ll have so much energy when you come over

**Daichi:** you deserve your nap! I’ll bring you dinner tonight 😚

**Sugawara:** 😚

**Oikawa:** scholar tingz

**Sugawara:** lucky tingz

**Kuroo:** wow can’t relate, I just got a C on one of my 😎😎 projects because I guess I formatted it so wrong and I didn’t write in depth enough paragraphs.

**Kenma:** awesome sauce

**Sugawara:** Still passing bbg😘

**Kuroo:** ur right 😘

**Nishinoya:** NICE JOB SUGA 

**Nishinoya:** you should write my essays for me

**Sugawara:** you should not say stupid things

**Sugawara:** omg I just thought of something

**Sugawara:** Daichi I deserve a reward

**Daichi:** I know. I was gonna pick up your favorite ice cream

**Sugawara:** no no

**Sugawara:** I was thinking more along the lines of dick 🥰

**Daichi:** Suga, why in the groupchat

**Sugawara:** Why not 🥰

**Daichi:** it’s embarrassing

**Sugawara:** it’s romantic

**Sugawara:** Anyways. I’m gonna take my nap. Love you all!

**Kuroo:** Suga :,-)

**Kageyama:** love you suga!

**Sugawara:** 🥰🥰🥰

**-**

  
  


**Tsukishima** and  **Yamaguchi:**

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki Tsukki Tsukkiii

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi Yamaguchi Yamaguchiii

**Yamaguchi:** My class got cancelled and it was my last one for the day

**Yamaguchi:** Are you busyyyy?

**Tsukishima:** I was just gonna pick up something to eat

**Tsukishima:** Wanna go with me?

**Yamaguchi:** yes 🥰

**Tsukishima:** I’ll go to your place then

**Yamaguchi:** Do you wannnaaaa

**Yamaguchi:** Sleep over?

**Tsukishima:** Yeah

**Tsukishima:** I’ll be over once I get all my stuff together

**Yamaguchi:** IM SO EXCITED 

**Tsukishima:** I sleep over like every weekend

**Yamaguchi:** I know and I always have so much fun

**Yamaguchi:** I wanna see you so bad

**Tsukishima:** shut up lol

**Yamaguchi:** Hurryyyyyy

**Tsukishima:** I’m going as fast as I can

**Yamaguchi:** Liar. You’re probably WALKING right now because you don’t love me enough to run

**Tsukishima:** lol I’ll be there in a bit

**-**

_ (*´_ゝ｀) _

**Yamaguchi:** _ Attached Image _

**Yamaguchi:** Look!

**Kuroo:** TSUKKI

**Kuroo:** Is he sleeping?

**Yamaguchi:** No

**Yamaguchi:** He’s ✨recharging✨

**Kuroo:** What?

**Yamaguchi:** Sometimes when we’re out for too long he gets super exhausted so when we get back home he just hugs me for a little bit

**Yamaguchi:** It’s so cute lol

**Yamaguchi:** I love him so much 

**Sugawara:** THATS CUTE THATS SO CUTE SO SI CUTE

**Nishinoya:** WAIT AHAH

**Nishinoya:** What do you guys do when you’re together?

**Yamaguchi:** Just hang out I guess? Nothing crazy

**Nishinoya:** Omg wait you guys like

**Nishinoya:** Kiss omgomg you guys kiss

**Daichi:** Noya what

**Asahi:** you act like that’s not normal

**Nishinoya:** TSUKKI JUST KISSES YAMAGUCHI WHAT OMGOMG

**Daichi:** Shut up

**Nishinoya:** NO THINK ABOUT IT

**Daichi:** Okay I will

**Daichi:** Wow that’s so crazy, boyfriends kiss

**Sugawara:** HAHA NOYA WHAT ARE YOU SAYING

**Nishinoya:** omg they’re childhood friends tHEYRE CHILDHOOD FRIENDS

**Nishinoya:** AND THEY’RE SO IN LOVE AND THEY’RE JUST GONNA BE IN LOVE FOREVER IM SO HAPPY ASAHI HOLD ME

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI IS TELLING ME TO PUT MY PHONE AWAY BRB I GOTTA PAY ATTENTION TO MY NEEDY BF IM SO IN LOVE AND IM GONNA BE IN LOVE FOREVER

**Nishinoya:** OMGOMG

**Daichi:** Shut up Noya lmaoooo

**-**

**Hinata:** UM 

**Hinata:** OMG UM

**Oikawa:** What?

**Hinata:** UM UM

**Yamaguchi:** Are you okay?

**Hinata:** UM NO UMMMM

**Oikawa:** What is wrong with you

**Hinata:** IM GOING TO THE BEACH WITH KENMA ADN TSUKKI AND YAMAGUCHI AND KAGEYAMA

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA ANDAEGSC

**Hinata:** KENMAFBSAJC OMG

**Hinata:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** So Kenma WANTED TO VISIT RIGHT SO ME AND TOBIO WERE LIKE LETS JUST SPEND THE NIGHT IN TOKYO AND THEN GO BACK WITH HIM THE NEXT DAY

**Hinata:** AND KAGEYAMA GETS SLEEPY ON CAR RIDES SO HE SAT IN THE BACKWITH ME

**Hinata:** AND KENMA GETS SLEEPY TOO

**Hinata:** IM LITERALLY SHAKING OMG THEY’RE SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** AHHHH

**Sugawara:** KAGEYAMA IS JUST HIS LEG REST

**Sugawara:** He’s just HOLDING KENMAS LITTLE LEGS SHUT UP

**Sugawara:** IM LITERALLY THROWING ALL OF MY DISHES AT THE WALL

**Sugawara:** IM GETTING THIS TATTOOED ON MY ASSSSSS

**Daichi:** Please don’t. I’m gonna have to look at that

**Sugawara:** DAICHI DAICHI YOU’RE HERE LOOK THEY’RE SO CUTE

**Daichi:** I know I know

**Oikawa:** Sorry I was

**Oikawa:** SAVING THIS PICTURE A MILLION TIMES UMMMM

**Akaashi:** They look so cute omg

**Bokuto:** SLEEPING KAGEYAMA IS SO CUTE

**Bokuto:** I WANNA HUG HIMMM

**Akaashi:** me too

**Bokuto:** WHAT

**Akaashi:** what

**-**

**Tanaka:** So i went to Kiyoko’s place

**Tanaka:** And Saeko was there?

**Tanaka:** And she was shocked that I was there??? Like what I should be shocked

**Tanaka:** I just wanted to visit my girlfriend but my sister was there too???

**Nishinoya:** OMG OMG CAN I COME OVER I WANNA SEE HER I WANNA SEE HER

**Tanaka:** Yeah lol she was asking about you

**Nishinoya:** IM OMW OMW OMW

**Daichi:** The way my mom visits Suga before she visits me

**Daichi:** It’s so cute in a way though

**Daichi:** Like idk it feels so nice to see my family get along with the person I love 

**Tanaka:** Saeko loves Kiyoko

**Tanaka:** So much it’s scary

**Tanaka:** But I love her more 😎

**Daichi:** Well I’d hope so lol

**-**

**Yamaguchi:** GUYS HINATA JUST

**Hinata:** Omg stop please

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU HAHAHA I CANNOT BREATHE

**Tsukishima:** LMAOOOO

**Sugawara:** uhhh??

**Daichi:** Oh no what happened

**Yamaguchi:** SO WE’RE AT THE BEACH AND OF COURSE WE’RE PLAYING VOLLEYBALL

**Yamaguchi:** These two girls come up to us trying to talk to Kageyama and Tsukki

**Yamaguchi:** They ask us to play and Tsukki is about to say no but Hinata is excited because more people are gonna join so he interrupts and says yes

**Hinata:** I’m embarrassed stop

**Oikawa:** Keep going

**Kenma:** YAMAGUCHI PLEASE CONTINUE

**Yamaguchi:** And like one girl in particular kept asking Kageyama to help her and asking how she should stand and how to hold her hands

**Yamaguchi:** AND SHE OBVIOUSLY IS TRYING TO GET HIS ATTENTION BUT IF YOU PUT A VOLLEYBALL AND HINATA IN FRONT OF HIM LITERALLY HE WON’T THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE

**Hinata:** End my life

**Yamaguchi:** Well Hinata noticed that she was constantly touching Kageyama and he HAHA HE TOLD HER “just leave if you don’t know how to play”

**Hinata:** STOP OMG I WAS ANNOYED LITERALLY I JUST REACTED AHH THAT WAS SO MEAN 

**Yamaguchi:** And she looked so confused BUT THEN HINATA ASKED KAGEYAMA TO SET THE BALL AND ACTED AS IF NOTHING HAPPENED AND THE GIRLS LEFT

**Hinata:** I don’t deserve a life or thoughts or ANYTHING

**Oikawa:** EWEW EW WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT TO HER IDIOT

**Oikawa:** AHHH SHOUYOU EW

**Kenma:** IT WAS HORRIBLE TO WATCH BUT I HAVEN’T STOPPED LAUGHING

**Sugawara:** HINATA WHAT AHHH

**Sugawara:** But also where is Kageyama?

**Tsukishima:** He went to buy Hinata a snack to make him feel better

**Hinata:** I want to dieeee

**-**

**Kuroo:** _ Attached Image _

**Kuroo:** KENMA IS BACK HOME IN MY ARMS

**Kuroo:** I’M NEVER GONNA STOP KISSING YOU

**Kuroo:** NEVER LEAVE ME AGAIN

**Kenma:** You’re the one who didn’t come with me

**Kuroo:** I HAD TO FINISH UP SOME SCHOOL WORK

**Kenma:** you snooze you lose

**Kuroo:** DID YOU NOT MISS ME

**Kenma:** I missed you

**Kuroo:** KENMA NEVER LEAVE ME AGAIN

**Oikawa:** HAHAH SHUT UP KUROO

**Kuroo:** MY LIFE IS MEANINGLESS WITHOUT HIM

**Sugawara:** Hey Kenma, wanna come visit me? You can stay here for the weekend

**Kenma:** omw

**Kuroo:** SUGA NO

**Kuroo:** I’LL DIE WITHOUT HIM

**Akaashi:** Hey Kenma you should come visit me heart eyes

**Kenma:** omw heart eyes

**Kuroo:** AKAASHI NO

**Kenma:** Literally I’m sitting right next to you. Stop being dramatic lol

**Kuroo:** KENMA NEVER LEAVE ME AGAIN

**Oikawa:** omg


	86. The way that this means nothing. Like absolutely nothing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: Tokyo Ghoul??? Where’s the flavor, Tsukishima 

_ (*´_ゝ｀) _

**Hinata:** Wouldn't it be sooo crazy if Kageyama came over to my place right now

**Hinata:** Like so so crazy and wacky and unexpected

**Kenma:** woah that would be nearly insane!!!!

**Hinata:** THATS WHAT IM SAYING LIKE I WOULD BE SO SURPRISED IF KAGEYAMA JUST KNOCKED ON MY DOOR RIGHT NOW

**Oikawa:** Gobsmacked to say the least 

**Kageyama:** would you hold on?? I’m putting clothes away

**Hinata:** I’m just talking about a super random situation haha

**Hinata:** what are you talking about?!

**Tsukishima:** You’re annoying

**Kageyama:** no he’s not

**Kageyama:** he’s cute

**Kenma:** HES CUTE SHUT UP TSUKISHIMA

**Hinata:** I’m cute Tsukishima shut up 

**Tsukishima:** whatever

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan is at work(´༎ຶོρ༎ຶོ`)

**Oikawa:** I’m gonna die

**Oikawa:** He’s gonna come home to a dead boyfriend

**Tsukishima:** you’re annoying too

**Sugawara:** Tsukki are you okay?

**Tsukishima:** yes

**Kageyama:** no. He’s upset because Yamaguchi has been busy all week so he hasn’t seen him

**Tsukishima:** I’m literally never telling you anything again. You just exist to embarrass me

**Sugawara:** Aw you just miss Yamaguchi aw aw

**Tsukishima:** He’s barely on his phone too

**Oikawa:** WELL DON'T TAKE IT OUT ON ME

**Tsukishima:** annoying

**Kageyama:** lol

**Hinata:** omg someone just knocked on my door

**Hinata:** who could that be??

**Kageyama:** shut up

**Hinata:** WOW ITS KAGEYAMA WOW WOW

**Kageyama:** omg

**Hinata:** I’M SO SURPRISED

**Oikawa:** HES SO SURPRISED

**Kenma:** GOBSMACKED TO SAY THE LEAST

**Tsukishima:** why is this happening

**Tsukishima:** Everyone here is so annoying

**Daichi:** Tsukishima omg

**Sugawara:** we’ve raised an angry kid Daichi 😕

**-**

**Yamaguchi:** teehee teehee

**Yamaguchi:** _ Attached image _

**Hinata:** YOURE BACK

**Oikawa:** oh thank god! Tsukki was being so mean

**Yamaguchi:** he’s just taking a nap now teehee

**Yamaguchi:** look how cute he looks

**Yamaguchi:** his glasses are off 🥺🥺

**Yamaguchi:** and his hair is so messy 🥺🥺

**Yamaguchi:** He’s so so so cute I’m so in love with him

**Yamaguchi:** ahh I’m gonna wake him up so I can hear his voice💘

**Oikawa:** aww that’s so sweet

**Yamaguchi:** his voice when he wakes up is so 🤤🤤🥵🥴😈😈

**Oikawa:** oh

**Oikawa:** uh haha

**Oikawa:** ew what you ruined such a cute moment

**Tsukishima** removed  **Yamaguchi** from the group

**Tsukishima:** We’ll be back later

**Tsukishima** left the group

**Nishinoya:** UM UM AHAHHH OMG OMG TSUKKI FUCKS??? 

**Nishinoya:** TSUKKI FUCKS!!!!! OH MY GOD ASAHI ASAHI

**Asahi:** Noya you’re always so weird about this lol

**-**

**Bokuto:** ME AND AKAASHI TOOK A PICTURE TODAY

**Bokuto:** ONE OF THE CUTE ONES WHERE THE COUPLE IS WEARING MATCHING OUTFITS AND ARE POSING SUPER COOL

**Bokuto:** _ Attached Image _

**Akaashi:** we look so good 💗💗

**Bokuto:** Akaashi in a skirt 💗🥰 HES SO BEAUTIFUL

**Sugawara:** AH AKAASHI I WANT TO KISS YOU YOU LOOK AMAZING

**Akaashi:** SUGA COME KISS ME

**Bokuto:** no :-(

**Akaashi:** it’s a joke Bokuto lol

**Sugawara:** or is it 😋

**Kuroo:** or is it😼😼

**Sugawara:** wow our brains

**Kuroo:** incredible

**Sugawara:** we’re connected via brain cell

**Kenma:** how sweet

**Kenma:** ALSO AKAASHI OMGOMGOMG

**Oikawa:** AKAASHI LOOKS AMAZING NO ONE SAY A WORD TO ME UNTIL NEXT YEAR

**Kageyama:** Akaashi looks very pretty but is no one gonna talk about how good Bokuto looks??

**Bokuto:** YOU THINK I LOOK GOOD

**Kageyama:** Yes

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI AKAASHI LOOK LOOK OMG KAGEYAMA THINKS I LOOK GOOD

**Akaashi:** I know

**Akaashi:** because you do 🥰

**Bokuto:** MY HEART WASNT READY FOR ANY OF THAT AHHH

**Bokuto:** AKAAASHIIII

**Bokuto:** KAGEYAMA

**Akaashi:** calm down lol

**Kageyama:** lol :-)

**-**

**Yamaguchi:** if me and Kageyama were dating that’d be so many yamas

**Kageyama:** so many mountains

**Tsukishima:** that’s gross and I don’t want to think about that

**Kageyama:** you’re just mad because you aren’t a Yama

**Kageyama:** TSUKIYAMA HA

**Yamaguchi:** GENIUS YOURE A GENIUS KAGEYAMA

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI SAID Tokyo Ghoul 😍😍

**Sugawara:** Tokyo Ghoul??? Where’s the flavor, Tsukishima 

**Sugawara:** Tsukiyama*

**Nishinoya:** oop LMAOOO

**Tsukishima:** omg I don’t even like Tokyo Ghoul

**Hinata:** OMG WAIT

**Hinata:** I call Kageyama yamayama sometimes

**Hinata:** IF I CALL YAMAGUCHI YAMAYAMA TOO OMG

**Hinata:** YAMAYAMA AND YAMAYAMA

**Yamaguchi:** HAHA OMG 

**Nishinoya:** SO MANY YAMAS AHAH

**Asahi:** yama doesn’t even look like a real word anymore lmao

**Oikawa:** is this what you guys think about? 

**Oikawa:** like this is what your brain produces throughout the day

**Sugawara:** Someone is 😎 jealous😎

**Oikawa:** I’m really not

**Kenma:** Karasuno is scary

**-**

**Sugawara:** GUYS IM HAVING SUCH A GOOD DAY OMG

**Sugawara:** IM WEARING MY SHORT SHORTS TO CELEBRATE

**Sugawara:** and I’m gonna sit here patiently and wait for Daichi to come over 😋😋

**Kuroo:** What got you in such a good mood?

**Sugawara:** idk I just woke up on the right side of the bed I guess! And I don’t feel stressed or anything so it’s nice

**Tanaka:** So we're not gonna question the celebratory short shorts?

**Sugawara:** And this morning I got up super early and cleaned the place and did my homework early.

**Kuroo:** ooh so it’s a motivated day

**Sugawara:** exactly!!

**Tanaka:** so we aren’t questioning it. Got it!

**Sugawara:** I also made Daichi food for when he gets here

**Sugawara:** he’s been at work all day 

**Sugawara:** Ahh I can't wait to see him omg

**Kuroo:** lol suga you’re so cute

**Sugawara:** KENMA HELP YOUR MAN IS BEING SO SWEET

**Kenma:** KURO YOURE SCARING SUGA

**Kuroo:** HIM AND DAICHI ARE SO CUTE I CANT HELP IT

**Kuroo:** THEY JUST NEED EACH OTHER SO MUCH OMG OMG

**Kuroo:** it’s FATE THEYRE SOULMATES I'M GONNA START SOBBING SOONTHEYRE SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** SOULMATE TINGZ THATS ME AND DAICHI OMG I LOVE DAICHI SO MUCH

**Sugawara:** EVERYONE SHUT UP I THINK HES HERE AHHH OMGOMG

**Kuroo:** KENMA I LOVE THEM

**Kenma:** I know. You talk about them all the time

**Oikawa:** he’s obsessed with them lol

**Kuroo:** I AM I AM

**Sugawara:** Daichi just KISSED ME ON THE NOSE SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME THAT OMG THATS SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** okay GOODBYE IM GONNA EAT DINNER WITH HIM

**Kuroo:** THEYRE SO MARRIED SO SO MARRIED 

**Kenma:** omg Kuroo stop lmaoo you’re being such a freak

**Oikawa:** why is he like this

**Kenma:** HES LITERALLY ROLLING AROUND ON THE BED LMAOO

**Kuroo:** THEY'RE IN LOVE

**-**

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** um?

**Sugawara:** he loves my short shorts

**Oikawa:** you cant do that

**Oikawa:** you can’t just send a picture of Daichi kissing your thighs suga that’s scary

**Sugawara:** oh sorry you’re right

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** SUGA WHAT HINATA IS HERE

**Hinata:** AHHH SUGA

**Sugawara:** Daichi loves my legs

**Sugawara:** let my man mark up my thighs if he wants

**Hinata:** DONT SHOW US

**Nishinoya:** SHOW US SHOW US

**Sugawara:** gotta go gotta go

**Sugawara:** I’ll talk to you guys when I’m done getting railed 😊😊

**Oikawa:** SUGA

**Nishinoya:** YES AHAHAH OMG NICE DAICHI AND SUGA


	87. head empty so i'm just going to sit here and think about tamaki from bnha calling mirio the sun bc that is very chefs kiss in my opinion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tanaka: Hey mom.. Hey dad…
> 
> Nishinoya: When did this end..
> 
> Tanaka: When did you lose your happiness..
> 
> Nishinoya: I’m here alone inside of this broken home

_ Iwaizumi Heart Eyes _

**Sugawara:** So….

**Sugawara:** Am I a joke to you guys?

**Sugawara:** Do you all hate me or something?

**Sugawara:** You all want me to just ?? stop existing??

**Akaashi:** No, I love you

**Sugawara:** I love you too!

**Sugawara:** So you all hate me except Akaashi

**Sugawara:** You all want me to die except Akaashi

**Daichi:** Why are you being so dramatic? 

**Sugawara:** OH I’M DRAMATIC?

**Kuroo:** Sug u kno ur my boo thang

**Oikawa:** SUG

**Sugawara:** Kuroo EW

**Kuroo:** Sry

**Sugawara:** Why are you typing like a freak?

**Sugawara:** NO WAIT

**Sugawara:** I’M GETTING DISTRACTED

**Kuroo:** My pp gettin the ol glob glob

**Kuroo:** sloppy toppy 

**Daichi:** STOP???

**Sugawara:** HAHA STOP

**Sugawara:** ANYWAYS

**Sugawara:** YOU ALL HATE ME

**Sugawara:** YAMAGUCHI YOU HATE ME THE MOST

**Yamaguchi:** ME??!?!?!?!?

**Sugawara:** YES YOU

**Sugawara:** WAS I JUST NEVER SUPPOSED TO FIND OUT YOU AND YACHI DATED DURING YOUR SECOND YEAR?

**Kageyama:** Oh yeah

**Hinata:** OH YEAH

**Tsukishima:** I forgot about that

**Yamaguchi:** …. Me too

**Sugawara:** ??!?@?!?!??! DAICHI DID YOU KNOW

**Daichi:** Yes??

**Daichi:** Tanaka and Noya know too

**Tanaka:** I thought everyone knew

**Sugawara:** AM I A JOKE TO YOU GUYS?

**Tanaka:** It lasted like three weeks, chill

**Sugawara:** CHILL???

**Sugawara:** YAMAGUCHI HOW COULD YOU KEEP THIS FROM ME??

**Yamaguchi:** It’s not a big deal

**Yamaguchi:** Please stop being so dramatic

**Sugawara:** Cool.

**Sugawara:** I get it.

**Sugawara:** You hate me

**Sugawara:** I don’t get any details

**Sugawara:** Because you hate me

**Daichi:** Koushi...

**Yamaguchi:** Omg

**Yamaguchi:** I asked Yachi on a date after our first game of the season and she said yes? We went out to dinner and after we climbed onto my roof and watched the stars. We dated for a few weeks and then broke up because I realized I was in love with Tsukki and projecting my feelings for him onto her

**Yamaguchi:** I don’t really like talking about it because I actually feel really bad

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi, she’s not upset about it. She knows

**Yamaguchi:** Still

**Tsukishima:** :/ Stop overthinking it again

**Tsukishima:** I have to run some errands today, is it okay if I come and pick you up and bring you with me?

**Yamaguchi:** Yes!! I’ll get dressed right now!!

**Sugawara:** AHHH YAMAGUCHI I’M SORRY

**Sugawara:** I WAS BEING DRAMATIC I DIDN’T MEAN TO MAKE YOU UPSET

**Yamaguchi:** IT’S OKAY 

**Yamaguchi:** BUT YES WE DATED

**Yamaguchi:** IT WAS ALRIGHT I GUESS

**Sugawara:** I’M SORRY I’M SORRY I LOVE YOU I’LL BRING YOU COOKIES TN 

**Yamaguchi:** OMG OMG I LOVE YOU I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOU

**Sugawara:** YES YES YES

**Daichi:** This is cute   
  


\--

**Kenma:** Something

**Kenma:** Horrible

**Kenma:** Something

**Kenma:** Traumatic 

**Kenma:** Something

**Kenma:** Chilling

**Kenma:** happened to me today

**Kuroo:** Ew 

**Kuroo:** Kitten, stop, I’m gonna get pissed off again

**Hinata:** Kitten

**Kenma:** I have CHILLS

**Hinata:** Me too. I have chills everytime I see Kuroo say that to you

**Kageyama:** Why are you like that?

**Kenma:** I’m going to DIE

**Akaashi:** Why?   
**Kuroo:** STOP DON’T TALK ABOUT IT

**Kenma:** KURO KURO I’M SO SCARED

**Kenma:** PLEASE COME HOLD ME

**Kuroo:** I HAVE TO GO TO WORK

**Kenma:** IF YOU LOVED ME YOU’D CALL OUT

**Kuroo:** NO

**Kuroo:** OH GOD

**Akaashi:** Kuroo, go to work

**Kuroo:** I’m walking there rn!

**Akaashi:** Kenma what happened?

**Kenma:** I WAS OUT GETTING COFFEE EARLIER

**Kenma:** AND SITTING AT A TABLE AND WAITING FOR KURO

**Kenma:** AND THIS GIRL CAME OVER AND ASKED TO SIT DOWN AND I WAS LIKE WHATEVER SURE SINCE IT WAS BUSY

**Kenma:** AND SHE JUST STARTS FLIRTING WITH ME

**Kenma:** SHE TOUCHED MY HAND

**Kenma:** EW EW EW

**Kenma:** EW EW EW 

**Kenma:** SHE COMPLIMENTED MY HAIR AND MY EYES AND LIKE MY BODY?? SHE SAID I WAS ‘FIT’??

**Kuroo:** Ew I’m pissed off

**Sugawara:** Don’t be, she didn’t know

**Kuroo:** BUT I’M STILL PISSED OFF

**Kenma:** I WAS SCARED 

**Kenma:** I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY

**Kenma:** I was getting so flustered and embarrassed because that’s how I am when people compliment me and I didn’t know what to say so that just made it worse

**Kenma:** And she just took it as a sign to keep going??

**Kenma:** AND LIKE

**Kenma:** SHE ASKED IF I WANTED TO ‘GET OUT OF HERE’

**Kenma:** LIKE?? IT’S 1PM. THIS IS A COFFEE SHOP

**Kenma:** I WAS SO EMBARRASSED 

**Kenma:** And then my Kuro showed up and… well

**Kenma:** HE MADE IT WORSE?

**Oikawa:** OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD

**Kuroo:** I

**Kuroo:** Am not strong enough to be faced in a situation like that and not be petty ❤️

**Sugawara:** What did you do?

**Kenma:** EMBARRASS ME 

**Kenma:** He walked in and I think he just knew? What was going on??

**Kuroo:** WHEN I COMPLIMENT HIM HE GETS SO FLUSTERED AND BLUSHY AND I KNOW THAT LOOK BECAUSE IT’S ONE OF MY FAVORITES SO I COULD TELL WHAT WAS GOING ON BECAUSE HE LOOKED LIKE THAT

**Kenma:** SHUT UP EMBARRASSING BITCH

**Kenma:** He came over to the table and hugged me?? Like i was sitting so he kind of just pulled me to his side and stuff

**Kenma:** BUT HE DID IT BY GRABBING MY HAIR LIKE A LUNATIC 

**Kenma:** AND WAS LIKE ‘are you ready to go, kitten?’ 

**Hinata:** KITTEN

**Kenma:** THE GIRL’S FACE

**Kenma:** IT’S INGRAINED IN MY RETINAS 

**Kenma:** Anyways remember months ago when I said I didn’t have a sexuality figured out well this experience made me realize that I’m gay ❤️ Women don’t interact ever thanks

**Sugawara:** Woooo gay buddies ❤️

**Sugawara:** Homiesexuals ❤️

**Sugawara:** Also Kuroo you’re ugly

**Kuroo:** SHUT UP BITCH

\--

**Nishinoya:** I’m going on a date with Asahi today!!

**Nishinoya:** We’re going to this cute little creek he found to look at the flowers and have a picnic!!!!

**Nishinoya:** What is everyone else doing?

**Hinata:** Tobio and I are taking Natsu to the park!

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki is sleeping on me lol

**Oikawa:** Me and Iwa-chan are looking at puppies!!

**Kenma:** PUPPIES??

**Nishinoya:** PUPPIES??

**Oikawa:** Yes! He wants a dog so bad lol

**Asahi:** I have a link for shelters if you want to adopt too!

**Oikawa:** Send them pls!

**Tanaka** : Well

**Tanaka:** Kiyoko is busy today so I’m alone 💔😃

**Sugawara:** I’m leaving Daichi’s house rn

**Daichi:** Koushi, stop

**Nishinoya:** Wut

**Kenma:** Me and Kuro are staying in bed all day long and watching TV and cuddling

**Kenma:** Wait but also wut

**Sugawara:** Daichi’s pissing me off.

**Daichi:** I’d say I’m sorry but I’m literally not in the wrong here.

**Sugawara:** Sure.

**Hinata:** Wut

**Tsukishima:** Um

**Tanaka:** Hey mom.. Hey dad…

**Nishinoya:** When did this end..

**Tanaka:** When did you lose your happiness..

**Nishinoya:** I’m here alone inside of this broken home

**Kageyama:** Who’s right who’s wrong who really cares?

**Tsukishima:** The fault the blame, the pain’s still there

**Yamaguchi:** I’m here alone inside of this broken home

**Sugawara:** OMG HAHA

**Sugawara:** Guys shut up I’m supposed to be angry

**Nishinoya:** WROTE IT DOWN ON THE WALLS SHE WAS SCREAMING IT OUT

**Tsukishima:** Made it clear she’s still here, are you listening now?

**Sugawara:** AHAHA STOP

**Daichi:** omfg

**Daichi:** Kou.. Come back inside 

**Yamaguchi:** JUST A GHOST IN THE HALLS

**Hinata:** FEELING EMPTY THEY’RE VACANT NOW

**Sugawara:** AHAHA

**Sugawara:** Ok ok ok Daichi I’m omw

**Daichi: ❤️😗**

**Sugawara:** … 😙

**  
  
**

**\--**

**Oikawa:** _ attached image  _

**Oikawa:** GUYS

**Daichi:** OMG

**Sugawara:** OMG I’M ABOUT TO DIE

**Kenma:** KURO I’M PEEING ARE YOU SEEING THIS

**Kuroo:** YOU GUYS GOT A DOG??

**Oikawa:** YES

**Oikawa:** WE JUST ADOPTED HER

**Oikawa:** Her name is Sora!!

**Oikawa:** Thank you Asahi for that link!!

**Asahi:** Np!! I work at a shelter part time and I love seeing the pets find their homes! 🥺

**Nishinoya:** Asahi 🥺🥺🥺

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** Look how happy iwa-chan looks!

**Iwaizumi:** :-) :-)

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN YOU’RE SO CUTE

**Kuroo:** Iwaizumi smiling while hugging a dog

**Kuroo:** I’ve seen it

**Kuroo:** I can pass away peacefully now 

**Kenma:** Take me with you

**Kageyama:** Awww

- -

**Kuroo** and  **Oikawa:**

**Oikawa:** Facetime me when you get out of class!! It’s been YEARS

**Kuroo:** OKAY

-

**Kuroo:** Lol this professor won’t stop GOING ON AND ON

**Kuroo:** I’M SO BORED

**Kuroo:** Omg I have an idea

**Oikawa:** What

**Kuroo:** U know that tik tok trend rn

**Kuroo:** The ‘call ur bf by their real name’ thing

**Oikawa:** YES

**Kuroo:** LET’S DO IT

**Oikawa:** YES

\--

**Kenma** and  **Kuroo**

**Kuroo:** Hey, Kenma, Oikawa and I are going out to lunch after I get out of class so I’ll be home a little later today

**Kenma:** Okay

**Kenma:** Wait

**Kenma:** What?

**Kenma:** Excuse me?

**Kuroo:** What? 

**Kenma:** Why did you call me that

**Kuroo:** Kenma? 

**Kuroo:** It’s your name

**Kenma:** That’s weird

**Kenma:** Last time I checked my name was Kitten... but sure

**Kenma:** Lie to my face. That’s fine

**Kenma:** Have fun at lunch tho

**Kenma:** Bring me coffee on ur way back

**Kenma:** Pls

**Kenma:** WAIT

**Kenma:** WAIT OIKAWA DOESN’T LIVE HERE

**Kenma:** I hate you

**Kuroo:** Teehee

**Kuroo:** I’ll be home in like 20 minutes kitten  **❤️**

**Kenma:** I wish it could be sooner  **❤️**

**Kuroo: ❤️❤️**

**Kenma: ❤️❤️❤️**

\--

**Oikawa** and  **Iwaizumi:**

**Oikawa:** Hey, Iwaizumi I’m going out to lunch with Kuroo after he gets out of class so I’ll be home late today

**Iwaizumi:** Kuroo lives far away but okay

**Iwaizumi:** Also, ‘Iwaizumi’?

**Iwaizumi:** Baby are you okay?

**Iwaizumi:** You know you can tell me anything right?

**Iwaizumi:** You can just say you’ll be home late, and I won’t ask why if you don’t want to tell me

**Iwaizumi:** I love you

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t forget that

**Oikawa:** OMFG IWA-CHAN

**Oikawa:** I love you

**Iwaizumi:** I love you more

****  
  



	88. Literally a horror movie this episode is so scary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: OMG THAT PICTURE JUST EXISTS IM LITERALLY GONNA BACKFLIP OFF OF MOUNT FUJI AND LAND ON MY FEET SAFE AND SOUND
> 
> Akaashi: impressive

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ I’m not dumb _

**Sugawara:** My FACE

**Sugawara:** Is RED AHH

**Daichi:** Because you’re dumb ❤️

**Sugawara:** IT WAS AN ACCIDENT

**Asahi:** What happened??

**Sugawara:** I forgot I had a mole and I tried to scrub it off oops oops

**Asahi:** How?

**Sugawara:** IT WAS AN ACCIDENT

**Nishinoya:** ah Suga’s cute mole 

**Sugawara:** Noya 💗

**Nishinoya:** it’s so cute I can’t stop thinking about it omg

**Oikawa:** I’ll never be pretty enough. No mole, no freckles

**Sugawara:** sucks to suck😋

**Yamaguchi:** That's too bad😇

**Tsukishima:** lol

**Oikawa:** WE’RE SUPPOSED TO BUILD EACH OTHER UP HERE NOT MAKE ME FEEL UGLY

**Yamaguchi:** Suga that mole is so cute OMGOMG

**Sugawara:** Aw thanks! Yamaguchi I think your freckles are waaaay cuter

**Yamaguchi:** Aww wow thank you!

**Oikawa:** I’LL DIE THEN ITS OKAY

**Iwaizumi:** idiot

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN COMFORT ME

**Iwaizumi:** You know you’re pretty, stupid

**Iwaizumi:** I tell you everyday

**Sugawara:** Iwaizumi is just in love

**Sugawara:** with a man who doesn’t have a cute mole under his eye

**Yamaguchi:** or freckles

**Iwaizumi:** Something has to keep him humble

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN

**Iwaizumi:** I’m joking I’m joking

**Oikawa:** ( ˙-˙ )

**-**

**Sugawara:** Sing along of you think he’s attractive

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Video _

**Kenma:** These are just pics of Daichi? With Superbass playing in the background?

**Tanaka:** I haven't stopped singing 

**Kuroo:** Can you make one of Kageyama?

**Kuroo:** Asking for a friend😳😳

**Sugawara:** I can

**Hinata:** no don’t

**Sugawara:** I just wanted everyone to see how handsome Daichi is teehee

**Iwaizumi:** UM

**Iwaizumi:** OIKAWA WAS INSPIRED BY AKAASHI AND HE OMG 

**Iwaizumi:** OMG I

**Iwaizumi:** snahafsshwba

**Sugawara:** oh my

**Sugawara:** He’s flustered

**Iwaizumi:** _ Attached image _

**Iwaizumi:** HE JUST SENT ME THIS

**Kuroo:** The Aoba Johsai uniform

**Kuroo:** but make it the girls ONE OMG OIKAWA YOU LOOK SO GOOD

**Oikawa:** Mattsun and Makki said to wear it for Iwa-Chan lol

**Oikawa:** Idk why they had it but they did 

**Akaashi:** ah you look so cute

**Sugawara:** he does omgomg 

**Oikawa:** thank youuu ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

**Iwaizumi:** HIS LEGSWHAHAQ

**Iwaizumi:** THEY LOOK SO FUCKING LONG OMG

**Sugawara:** Iwaizumi said 🦵🏻🦵🏻🥴🤤🤤🤤😍👅👅

**Oikawa:** _ Attached Image _

**Oikawa:** they do look long lol

**Iwaizumi:** tooru

**Oikawa:** yes?

**Iwaizumi:** you know exactly what you’re doing

**Oikawa:** _ Attached Image _

**Oikawa:** （╹◡╹）

**Iwaizumi:** god

**Kenma:** I-2

**Kenma:** Is no one gonna say it??

**Nishinoya:** wut

**Kenma:** Oikawa is just

**Kenma:** openly making Iwaizumi horny 

**Kenma:** in the groupchat

**Oikawa:** idk what you mean

**Nishinoya:** oh

**Nishinoya:** OH OH

**Nishinoya:** AMAZING AMAZING OIKAWA YOURE A GENIUS

**Oikawa:** teehee teehee

**Nishinoya:** HORNY OIKAWA IS A GIFT HES A GIFT TO THIS WORLD AND HE IS THE REASON IM STILL ALIVE

**Asahi:** lmaoo calm down

**Oikawa:** _ Attached Image _

**Oikawa:** Look guys, you can see the bruise on my leg a little bit

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan keeps leaving bruises 

**Iwaizumi:** fucking stop idiot

**Iwaizumi:** i’m literally like 2 seconds away from the house

**Oikawa:** (*´꒳`*)

**Hinata:** ew

**Nishinoya:** SHUT UP SHOUYOU THIS IS AMAZING 

**Hinata:** no

**Nishinoya:** YES 

**Kuroo:** can we talk about Iwaizumi’s love for Oikawa’s legs??

**Oikawa:** yes

**Iwaizumi:** no

**Sugawara:** Incredible

**Oikawa:** OKAY I GOTTA GO

**Nishinoya:** NO DON’T LEAVE NOW

**Oikawa:** I HAVE A DICK TO RIDE GOODBYEYWW

**Hinata:** OIKAWA EW

**Nishinoya:** INCREDIBLE AMAZING JUST IMMACULATE TBH

**Asahi:** noya lmaoooo

**-**

**Nishinoya:** double date double date

**Tanaka:** double date double date

**Asahi:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** aww you all look like you’re having fun

**Asahi:** we’re having a movie night 😊

**Sugawara:** AHH KIYOKO JUST KISSING TANAKAS CHEEK OKAY OKAY OKAY CUTE OKAY OKAY

**Tanaka:** 🥰🥰🥰

**Sugawara:** ASAHI I SEE YOU KISSING NOYAS HAND OMGOMG OMGOMG

**Sugawara:** DAICHI NEEDS TO SEE THIS OMG DAICHI DAICHI

**Daichi:** you’re all so cute lol

**Nishinoya:** so what is everyone else doing today?

**Sugawara:** I’m keeping Kageyama company while he cleans 

**Kageyama:** woo!

**Hinata:** aw

**Hinata:** cute

**Kageyama:** you’re cute

**Hinata:** nope! You are

**Kageyama:** no no no you’re cute

**Hinata:** you’re the cutest

**Kageyama:** impossible, because that’s you

**Hinata:** I’m so in love with you lol

**Kageyama:** I love you moreeeeee

**Sugawara:** Kageyama is just blushing so much

**Kageyama:** I have to focus on cleaning oops

**Kuroo:** so cute so cute

**Sugawara:** chaos

**Bokuto:** ?!???

**Sugawara: 😊**

**Kageyama:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** UM KAGEYAMA WHY DID YOU SEND THAT

**Kenma:** SHOUYOU OMG

**Nishinoya:** NICE SHOUYOU OMG NICE KAGEYAMA

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Tsukishima:** what a bold image

**Kenma:** OMG THAT PICTURE JUST EXISTS IM LITERALLY GONNA BACKFLIP OFF OF MOUNT FUJI AND LAND ON MY FEET SAFE AND SOUND

**Akaashi:** impressive

**Kenma:** IGNORE THAT. THIS PICTURE OMG KAGEYAMA JUST HAS A PICTURE OF HINATAS FACE

**Kenma:** JUST WITH CUM ON IT

**Kenma:** AND ON HIS HAND

**Hinata:** stop please stop

**Oikawa:** SHOUYOU YOU LOOK SO SHY BUT YOU ALSO LOOK SO HAPPY WHAT IS THAT PICTURE

**Hinata:** WHY WOULDN’T I BE HAPPY AND SHY ARE YOU INSANE

**Hinata:** MY BOYFRIEND CAME ON MY FACE OF COURSE I WAS HAPPY

**Hinata:** WHY AM I EXPLAINING MYSELF

**Oikawa:** OMFG

**Kenma:** you somehow managed to be more embarrassing

**Akaashi:** that’s also impressive

  
  


**Hinata and Kageyama**

**Hinata:** WHY DID YOU SEND THAT

**Hinata:** TOBIO

**Kageyama:** Suga had my phone?

**Hinata:** CHECK THE GROUPCHAT

**Kageyama:** okay I’ll be right back

-

_ I’m not dumb _

**Kageyama:** SUGA WHY

**Kageyama:** SUGA WAS ON MY PHONE AND SENT THAT

**Kageyama:** NO ONE WAS SUPPOSED TO SEE THAT OMG

**Kuroo:** send more lol

**Kageyama:** NO OMG

**Daichi:** Koushi!!

**Sugawara:** ITS NOT MY FAULT DAICHI HE SAID I COULD SEND IT

**Kageyama:** YOU DIDNT TELL ME WHAT THE PICTURE WAS

**Sugawara:** YOU SAID YOU DIDNT CARE

**Kageyama:** BECAUSE I DIDNT THINK IT WOULD BE A PICTURE LIKE THAT OH MY GOD

**Tanaka:** Are you guys just text screaming in a silent room

**Sugawara:** sorta

**Sugawara:** Kageyama took his phone and he's inside of his closet

**Hinata:** I’d rather die

**Sugawara:** it’s okayyyy Hinata

**Sugawara:** I sent it because you look so cute

**Sugawara:** you’re just giving him heart eyes even though he’s behind the camera

**Hinata:** THATS NOT THE POINT SUGA

**Oikawa:** SUGAWARA AHAHAHHA

**Sugawara:** I think Hinata looks cute

**Yamaguchi:** I see what you mean but suga

**Yamaguchi:** Kageyama has tons of pictures of Hinata. Why did you choose that one??

**Sugawara:** but none would have stirred up a ruckus like this

**Daichi:** stop talking like a freak omg

**Kageyama:** IM SO SORRY OMG I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS THAT PICTURE

**Hinata:** I FEEL LIKE IM GONNA DIE

**Kageyama:** Suga’s right though

**Kageyama:** you do look cute

**Hinata:** STOP AHAHA THATS NOT THE POINT OF THE PICTURE

**Hinata:** YOURE SO STUPID

**Kageyama:** coming from you

**Hinata:** you’re the one who lets anyone go through your phone and send a picture like that

**Kageyama:** well you’re the one who asked me to cum on your face soooo

**Hinata:** TOBIO

**Tsukishima:** oh wow

**Kenma:** THATS IT THATS ALL IT TAKES FOR ME TO PUNCH THE TV

**Kuroo:** KENMA DON'T THAT WAS EXPENSIVE

**Tanaka:** HINATA WHY DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE SPECIAL REQUESTS FOR KAGEYAMA’S NUT LOCATIONS

**Hinata:** PLEASE STOP

**Nishinoya:** RYUU WHY DID YOU SAY IT LIKE THAT AHAHA

**Tanaka:** AHAHA

**Hinata:** I’m gonna die I’m gonna die

**Hinata:** AHHH IM NEVER HAVING SEX AGAIN

**Yamaguchi:** Strong words from Hinata

**Tsukishima:** I was gonna say the same thing

**Hinata:** SHUT UP

**Kageyama:** omg

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** look! We’re even

**Daichi:** SUGA WHY

**Kuroo:** HAHAHA THIS GROUPCHAT IS A FEVER DREAM

**Iwaizumi:** I think I’ve seen more intimate photos here than I’ve seen in my entire life

**Sugawara:** I think I look cute 

**Hinata:** you’re just like this

**Sugawara:** 🥰


	89. this episode doesn't exist for so many reasons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: Well brb guys 😘
> 
> Daichi: Feel free not to come back

_ I’m not dumb _

**Akaashi:** Just got bit by a dog in a craft store parking lot 🙃

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Kenma:** A craft store parking lot?? What situation is that

**Akaashi:** A STUPID one

**Kageyama:** What happened? :-(

**Akaashi:** Oh it’s not super dramatic or anything!

**Akaashi:** I was walking up with Bokuto and this lady had her dogs on a leash and she was doing something idk 

**Akaashi:** And one of the dogs started barking at me and running at me and he was on a leash?? But she kind of just let him

**Akaashi:** And I hesitated because. Random dog barking and running at me. Scary

**Bokuto:** YEAH AND THIS LADY GOES

**Bokuto:** “oh don’t worry he’s friendly he just LOOKS threatening”

**Akaashi:** And then he bit my leg 

**Akaashi:** And I was too nervous to do anything so I just grabbed Bokuto’s hand and led him inside

**Sugawara:** AKAASHI?!?!?!?!?

**Daichi:** Was your leg okay???

**Akaashi:** Yeah it just bled a little

**Akaashi:** The bite wasn’t too big

**Sugawara:** AKAASHI?!?!?!?

**Akaashi:** It’s fine it’s fine

**Kageyama:** Was she still out there when you guys left???

**Akaashi:** Yes 🙃 and she heard me make a comment about her because I didn’t see her 🙃

**Kenma:** What did you say?

**Akaashi: ‘** oh thank god ms thing and her cujos are gone’

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI I WANTED TO SAY SOMETHING

**Akaashi:** IT’S OKAY IT’S FINE I WAS NERVOUS YOU DIDN’T NEED TO

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI

**Oikawa:** Is your leg okay???

**Akaashi:** Yes

**Akaashi:** I’m at home now

**Akaashi:** Bokuto was being dramatic the whole way to my apartment 

**Bokuto:** I’M NOT BEING DRAMATIC, SHE SHOULDN’T HAVE BEEN LIKE THAT

**Akaashi:** 🙃

**Akaashi:** Anyway I cleaned it and now he’s making me dinner because he feels bad for me

**Bokuto:** I don’t feel bad for you!

**Akaashi:** He pities me

**Bokuto:** I don’t!

**Akaashi:** 🙃

**Bokuto:** Akaashiiiiii

**Bokuto:** Can I spend the night? 🥺 I want to cuddle you

**Akaashi:** You want to pity me 🙃

**Bokuto:** NOOOO

**Akaashi:** I’m joking

**Akaashi:** You don’t have to bribe me with cuddles, Bokuto

**Akaashi:** But yes

**Kenma:** Wow

**Kenma:** That’s 

**Kenma:** What kind of situation is that?

**Akaashi:** Idk

**Akaashi:** My leg hurts

**Akaashi:** Bokuto  **🙃**

**Akaashi:** Bokuto my leg hurts  **🙃**

**Bokuto:** I’m sorry Keiji :-(

**Akaashi: 🙃**

\--

**Hinata:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Hinata:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Hinata:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Oikawa:** Omg what

**Hinata:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Daichi:** What?

**Hinata:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Kenma:** WHAT

**Hinata:** TOBIO

**Hinata:** I CAN’T BREATHE

**Tanaka:** What???

**Hinata:** TOBIO WENT OUT WITH ATSUMU

**Oikawa: 😡**

**Hinata:** AND THEY CAME OVER TO DROP SOMETHING OFF AND TOBIO HAS???? A NOSE PIERCING

**Hinata:** I’M GOING TO DIE

**Kageyama:** Stop it

**Atsumu:** I have one too Hinata, glad you noticed 😔

**Hinata:** I’M GOING TO DIE

**Hinata:** AND THE WORST PART IS

**Hinata:** HE CAME OVER

**Hinata:** SHOWED ME THE PIERCING AND THEN LEFT

**Atsumu:** I WAS THERE TOO??

**Atsumu:** AND STOP HAHA

**Atsumu:** WE’RE GETTING DINNER

**Hinata:** ATSUMU BRING HIM BACK

**Atsumu:** NO, HE WAS MY BOYFRIEND FIRST

**Hinata:** WELL HE’S MY BOYFRIEND NOW

**Atsumu:** TOO BAD

**Hinata:** I’m going to DIE

**Hinata:** AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

**Daichi:** Calm down

**Kageyama:** You’re so dramatic

**Hinata:** NO

**Hinata:** KENMA HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF KUROO GOT A MATCHING NOSE PIERCING WITH DAICHI AND THEN LEFT AFTER SHOWING YOU??

**Kenma:** Kuro with a nose piercing 😛 yum

**Oikawa:** YUM?

**Iwaizumi:** Why did you say yum

**Kenma:** Kuro.. Can I pierce your nose?

**Kuroo:** No???

**Kenma:** (｀Д´)

**Kuroo:** Why does that look like you?

**Kenma:** Ikr

**Kenma:** Also this one

**Kenma:** (¬､¬)

**Kuroo:** Oh wow

**Kuroo:** HAHA I CAN’T STOP LOOKING AT IT

**Kenma:** Teehee teehee

**Kenma:** Kuro I’m bringing you lunch in a little while （´・｀ ）♡

**Kuroo:** I can’t wait!!

**Kenma:** ✿♥‿♥✿

**Kuroo:** ༼♥ل͜♥༽

**Kenma:** Omg ew

**Kuroo:** Ikr

**Kenma:** (´◑ω◐`)

**Kuroo:** That one reminds me of you everytime I see it

**Kenma:** I think I’m offended

**Oikawa:** Did you two… forget that ur in the gc or something?

**Kuroo:** A little bit 

**Kenma:** Yes

**Akaashi:** Kuroo aren’t you at work???

**Kenma:** Yes

**Kuroo:** (☆´3｀)

**Kenma:** ♡ඩ⌔ඩ♡

**Oikawa:** DO THIS IN YOUR OWN CHATS OMG

**Hinata:** I left my phone for ten minutes omg

**Hinata:** BUT THIS WAS ABOUT ME??

**Kenma:** Not anymore sweetie

**Hinata:** (◣_◢)

-

**Kuroo:** Touch-a touch-a touch-a touch meeeee

**Kenma:** Shut up

**Kuroo:** I wanna be dirtyyyyyy

**Kenma:** SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** Thrill me chill me fulfill meeeee

**Oikawa:** CREATURE OF THE NIGHT

**Daichi:** Why are you guys singing rocky horror at 4am?

**Kuroo:** Guess I’m just in the mood

**Sugawara:** What kind of mood is that?

**Kuroo:** The mood where I want someone to 

**Kuroo:** touch-a touch-a touch-a touch me

**Oikawa:** Literally ew

**Oikawa:** I’m going to sleep now to have nightmares. Thanks Kuroo

**Kuroo:** Anytimes sweet cheeks 😋

**Kenma:** Stop

**Kuroo:** Why? Are you jealous?

**Kenma:** Maybe

**Kuroo:** o wow :;(∩´﹏`∩);:

**Kuroo:** Well brb guys 😘

**Daichi:** Feel free not to come back

\--

**Kenma:** You just got off of work, right?

**Kenma:** _ attached image _

**Kenma:** You should hurry home

**Asahi:** We’re literally cursed

**Oikawa:** I think you mean blessed

**Akaashi:** Kenma, groupchat

**Kenma:** o

**Kenma:** oops

**Kenma:** I’m gonna

**Kenma:** go

**Kenma:** Die

**Kenma:** YOU ALWAYS THINK IT WON’T HAPPEN OT YOU

**Kenma:** AND THEN IT DOES

**Akaashi:** It’s okay Kenma! We’ve seen worse!

**Nishinoya:** Kenma it’s staring at me

**Kenma:** no it isn’t

**Kenma:** NO IT ISN;T’

**Kenma:** CLOSE YOUR EYES

**Sugawara:** It’s okay Kenma, you look cute!

**Hinata:** I-

**Hinata:** Is this why he calls you kitten?

**Kenma:** SHUT UP SHOUYOU

**Sugawara:** YOU LOOK CUTE!

**Oikawa:** When he’s wearing nothing but lace panties and lace cat ears

**Oikawa:** And Sugawara still calls him cute

**Sugawara:** Well! He is!

**Kuroo:** Why’s my phone blowing uppp

**Kuroo:** Kenma I’m omw btw

**Kenma:** Cool! Don’t scroll up

**Kuroo:** ?

**Kuroo:** OH YM GOD

**Daichi:** You should have listened

**Kuroo:** I

**Kuroo:** omg

**Kuroo:** OMG

**Kuroo:** Kenma you look so good that I forgot how to BREATHE

**Oikawa:** THAT’S YOUR RESPONSE???

**Kuroo:** WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY

**Kuroo:** I CAN’T THINK RN

**Nishinoya:** nice

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Kuroo:** KENMA KENMA KENMA

**Kuroo:** YOU’RE WEARING THEM

**Kenma:** STOP I’M SO EMBARRASSED

**Kuroo:** OMG

**Kuroo:** Omg I bet you’re blushing

**Kuroo:** Send me another picture kitten 

**Hinata:** 😧

**Oikawa:** KUROO I

**Oikawa:** I’M

**Oikawa:** I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO SAY

**Daichi:** Kuroo you’re SUCH A FREAK

**Kenma:** Kuro no

-

**Kenma** and  **Kuroo:**

**Kenma:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** Holy shit


	90. this episode is kind of scary but only because kenma is weirdly feral idk i think i'm over compensating idk how to spell that word anyways but i think i am because i move out in like 12 hours and i'm gettin' nervous sir

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: I would never call Iwaizumi muscle god, bicep king, hunky beef-machine Hajime, cute. I’d say hot

_ I’m not dumb _

**Oikawa:** Omg guys

**Oikawa:** Omg

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan is so cute

**Daichi:** Why?

**Oikawa:** I can’t just compliment my bf? Damn

**Sugawara:** HAHA

**Daichi:** Suga why are you laughing at my expense?

**Sugawara:** Love? Idk

**Oikawa:** UM ANYWAYS

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan is so cute!

**Oikawa:** So like

**Daichi:** SO SOMETHING DID HAPPEN

**Oikawa:** Shut up bitch

**Oikawa:** ANYWAYS SO LIKE

**Oikawa:** I’m taking an online lecture this semester, and it’s at 8am because apparently past me wants me to die

**Oikawa:** And I was so tired, and the class was 2 and a HALF HOURS LONG WTF

**Oikawa:** And we had to do introductions :// by turning our cameras and mics on and introducing ourselves to the ENTIRE VIRTUAL CLASS

**Oikawa:** And Iwa-chan came out to sit on the couch with me because I accidentally woke him up by ignoring my alarm too many times

**Oikawa:** And I was cuddling him and I accidentally fell asleep teehee

**Oikawa:** AS THEY WERE DOING INTRODUCTIONS

**Oikawa:** And instead of waking me up when they called on me, Iwa-chan pretended my camera wasn’t working and acted like me so I didn’t miss my attendance points

**Oikawa:** So now my entire class thinks I have a sexy voice 🥰

**Oikawa:** But also I’m so in love with him

**Hinata:** That’s weird

**Oikawa:** So is asking your boyfriend to cum on your stomach and then saying the word tummy when talking about it, but hey, it’s not a competition, is it?

**Hinata:** .

**Oikawa:** That’s what I thought Shouyou

**Akaashi:** oh wow

**Oikawa:** Anyways I woke up a while after that and he gave me a kiss on the cheek and then FELL ASLEEP ON ME

**Iwaizumi:** The class was making me tired

**Oikawa:** YOU AREN’T EVEN THE ONE TAKING IT

**Iwaizumi:** I was taking notes for you!!

**Iwaizumi:** It’s boring as fuck

**Oikawa:** You could have woken me up and gone back to sleep if you were tired

**Iwaizumi:** Nooo

**Iwaizumi:** It’s more comfortable to sleep with your arms around me than in bed anyways

**Oikawa:** !

**Sugawara:** I think you broke him

**Oikawa:** !!

**Daichi:** Definitely broke him

**Oikawa:** !!!

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan!! I’m coming home from Tobio’s early so I can kiss you!!!

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Hinata:** You guys are hanging out?

**Oikawa:** No, don’t be ugly

**Kageyama:** Yes

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru you’re an idiot

**Oikawa:** An idiot who you like to fall asleep on 🥰🥰

**Iwaizumi:** 🙂

**Kuroo:** Holy shit I think I just combusted 

**Kuroo:** Iwaizumi!! Use emojis more often!! Your energy is so cute rn!

**Iwaizumi:** No

**Oikawa:** Don’t call him cute Kuroo

**Kuroo:** I SAID HIS ENERGY NOT HIM

**Kuroo:** I would never call Iwaizumi muscle god, bicep king, hunky beef-machine Hajime, cute. I’d say hot

**Kenma:** HUNKY BEEF MACHINE HAHA

**Kuroo:** Omg everyone shut up I made Kenma laugh 😻

**Kenma:** Shut up idiot

**Kenma:** You always make me laugh

**Kuroo:** Holy shit holy shit 

\--

**Kenma:** Omg guuygs

**Kenma:** Kuro and I are on our way to get my third iced coffee of the day!!!!!

**Akaashi:** Kenma no

**Daichi:** I’m 

**Daichi:** Concerned 

**Oikawa:** HAVE YOU EATEN?? PLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE EATING IF YOU’RE DRINKING THAT MUCH CAFFEINE 

**Kuroo:** WE ARE NOT GETTING ICED COFFEE

**Kuroo:** WE’RE GETTING STUFF FOR DINNER

**Kenma:** THE STORE IS RIGHT NEXT TO A COFFEE SHOP

**Kuroo:** NO

**Kuroo:** Also, yes, Oikawa, he ate breakfast and lunch and I keep trying to feed him snacks and water

**Kenma:** BEAN JUICE BEAN JUICE

**Kuroo:** NO

**Kenma:** YOU HATE ME

**Kuroo:** I’M DOING THIS OUT OF LOVE

**Kuroo:** IDIOT

**Kenma:** I HATE YOU

**Kuroo:** STOP IT

**Daichi:** Omg

**Sugawara:** Kenma I love your energy!!! You tell him!!

**Kenma:** Suga ❤️❤️

**Kenma:** Suga tell Kuro I deserve iced coffee ❤️❤️

**Sugawara:** Absolutely not

**Kenma:** I HATE IT HERE

-

**Kenma:** _ attached image _

**Kenma:** Update!

**Hinata:** You got coffee….

**Kuroo:** I’m so mad

**Kenma:** No you aren’t

**Kenma:** Kurooooooo

**Kenma:** Kuroooooooooo

**Kenma:** Kuro kuro kuro kuro

**Kenma:** Kuro KURO KURO KURO

**Kenma:** TETSUROU TETSUROU TETSUROU

**Hinata:** I don’t think I’ve ever heard you call him that

**Kenma:** Well

**Kenma:** I guess I’m ugly and desperate rn

**Kenma:** Gross

**Kenma:** TETSUROU 

**Kenma:** Tetsurou tetsurou pls answer me 😭

**Oikawa:** Omg shut up

**Oikawa:** Why don’t you just talk to him in person? You freak??

**Kenma:** Bc he’s ignoring me 😭

**Kenma:** Tetsurou I love youuuuuu

**Kenma:** Tetsurou 

**Kenma:** FINE

**Kenma:** IGNORE ME

**Kenma:** SEE IF I CARE

**Kenma:** I LOVE YOU

**Kenma:** UGH

**Daichi:** This is annoying ❤️

**Sugawara:** No it’s cute 

**Daichi:** You have a weird definition of cute

**Sugawara:** No I don’t!

**Kuroo:** Kenma locked himself in our room LMAO

**Oikawa:** You guys aren’t actually mad are you???

**Kuroo:** NO

**Oikawa:** Oh thank god

**Oikawa:** I don’t think I’d be able to handle that

**Oikawa:** You two are the only stable thing in my life

**Iwaizumi:** Same

**Daichi:** Same

**Sugawara:** Same

**Asahi:** Same

**Tanaka:** Same

**Kuroo:** We don’t really get mad at each other

**Kuroo:** or like have fights

**Kuroo:** We get irritated sometimes but we talk it out before it becomes anything more

**Daichi:** Aww Kuroo you’re so mature now

**Kuroo:** IDK WHAT THAT’S SUPPOSED TO MEAN DAICHI

**Kuroo:** Anyways

**Kuroo:** KENMA KENMA KENMA

**Kenma:** Tetsu tetsu tetsu 

**Kuroo:** Omg 

**Kuroo:** my ENTIRE HEART 

**Kuroo:** MY WHOLE WORLD

**Kuroo:** Dinner’s done ❤️

**Kenma:** Omg!!!! Omg!! Coming!! I love you!!!

**Kuroo:** Well I don’t love that iced coffee!!!

**Kenma:** Actually you love me despite all of my flaws and that just happens to be iced coffee so jokes on you!!!

**Kuroo:** Lmao

**Kuroo:** COME GET DINNER OMG

**Kenma:** SORRY YOUR SIDE OF THE BED IS JUST COMFORTABLE AND I DIDN’T WANNA GET UP

**Kuroo:** MY HEART

**Oikawa:** SHUT TF UP YOU TWO OMG

**Daichi:** Seriously

**Sugawara:** I THINK IT’S CUTE

**Oikawa:** Koushi no one else feels the same

**Kageyama:** I do! 

**Kuroo:** KAGEYAMA <3

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Kuroo:** ugh a kageyama smile

**Kenma:** screenshot screenshot screenshot

\--

**Kenma** changed the group name to  _ Dear Diary... _

**Oikawa:** I’m scared of what that means

**Kenma:** Let’s play a game called I want to embarrass Kuro

**Daichi:** Oh god

**Daichi:** What’s the occasion?

**Kenma:** No reason

**Kenma:** No reason at all

**Akaashi:** I feel like there’s a reason

**Kenma:** Anyways I can hear you all thinking

**Kenma:** Kuroo Tetsurou lives and breaths embarrassment 

**Kenma:** and that’s true

**Oikawa:** Oh wow

**Kenma:** One time omg

**Kenma:** One time me and Akaashi were hanging out with Kuro and Bokuto and getting high

**Kenma:** And we wanted to try that thing where you blow smoke into the other person’s mouth so we did right

**Kenma:** And Kuro got turned on ❤️ like what

**Oikawa:** AHAHAH EW

**Bokuto:** I don’t blame him 😔

**Kenma:** Ew.

**Kenma:** You disgust me

**Akaashi:** I guess we’re hotties 🥵💍

**Kenma:** Wbk baby 💍💋

**Kenma:** Omg anyways and then there was this other time where we went out with Bokuto and Akaashi and Kuro and Bokuto got way too drunk and Kuro couldn’t even walk straight ❤️ he fell and I tried to catch him but he just ended up accidentally hitting me in the head and I had a bruise for over a week

**Kenma:** And then he fell into a pile of trash bags 

**Akaashi:** And proceeded to sob for an hour straight

**Kenma:** Embarrassing bitch

**Kenma:** Oh yeah

**Kenma:** When we were kids he always would come over and show me different songs that he memorized 

**Kenma:** Which would be cute if they weren’t all fucking weird american rap songs

**Oikawa:** WHAT AHAH

**Kenma:** idk he thinks they’re funny

**Kenma:** He’d open my door and just start singing

**Kenma:** It was scary

**Kenma:** Omg and like

**Kenma:** OMG ONCE HIS PHONE BROKE AND HE HAD TO TAKE IT SOMEWHERE TO GET FIXED AND THIS IDIOT OPENED HIS CAMERA ROLL TO LIKE A MILLION PICTURES OF ME NAKED

**Kenma:** He was so embarrassed that he cried 

**Oikawa:** YOU’RE BEING MEAN KENMA

**Kenma:** No ❤️ plus he talks about that and laughs now

**Daichi:** Why are you bullying him so much rn?

**Kenma:** No reason ❤️

**Hinata:** I feel like there’s a reason

**Kenma:** There definitely isn’t 

-

**Kuroo:** Kenma. Why

**Kenma:** ❤️

**Kuroo:** I WAS TIRED?? I’M SORRY

**Kenma:** IDC IDC IDC

**Daichi:** What?

**Oikawa:** What?

**Asahi:** What?

**Kuroo:** I came home from work and Kenma was like. Trying really really hard to get me turned on bc like yeah

**Kenma:** YEAH AND THEN WHAT DID YOU DO? YOU FELL ASLEEP

**Kuroo:** I WAS TIRED

**Kenma:** I HOPE YOU DON’T LIKE WHAT I LOOK LIKE NAKED BECAUSE YOU’RE NEVER GONNA SEE THAT AGAIN

**Sugawara:** Oh my

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Kenma:** NO

**Kuroo:** KENMA 💔💔

**Kenma:** Oh, I’m sorry, are you talking to me?

**Kenma:** Bye

**Oikawa:** You two have been so dramatic recently 

**Oikawa:** It’s ugly. Get help ❤️

**Iwaizumi:** Says you

**Oikawa:** EXCUSE ME

**Kenma:** Kuro are you making breakfast 🥺

**Kenma:** It smells so good 🥺

**Kuroo:** Yes kitten, I’m making you some too

**Kuroo:** Come in the kitchen so I can give you a good morning kiss 🥺

**Kenma:** Omw 🥺

**Kuroo:** 🥺🥺🥺🥺

**Kenma:** 🥺🥺🥺🥺

**Tsukishima:** Wow


	91. Nothing happens ever it's just empty like my big and stupid hollow BRAIN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tanaka: OKAY WELL I HAVE TO CLEAN MY ROOM UP A BIT BECAUSE SHE’S COMING OVER I JUST NEEDED TO SCREAM ABOUT THAT
> 
> Nishinoya: SO CUTE SO CUTE RYUUUU

**Kenma** and  **Kuroo**

**Kenma:** Kuro come hold me please

**Kuroo:** I’m in class but I’ll be back home in like two hours?

**Kenma:** 😿

**Kuroo:** Kenma baby

**Kuroo:** What’s wrong??

**Kenma:** Inuoka is

**Kenma:** Scaring me

**Kuroo:** ?!

**Kenma:** So he like asked if I want to live with him next year

**Kenma:** And before i could tell him I’m living with my boyfriend, he got ahead of himself and was like

**Kenma:** “We can push our beds together!!”

**Kenma:** Kuro I DONT WANT TO CUDDLE HIM

**Kuroo:** Ew is he trying to piss me off?

**Kuroo:** You literally live with me lmao

**Kuroo:** You won’t have to cuddle him

**Kenma:** He’s so scary so scary

**Kuroo:** KENMA IM UNCOMFORTABLE BUT IM CACKLING IN CLASS

**Kenma:** KURO STOP

**-**

_ Dear Diary... _

**Tanaka:** GUYS OMG GUYS

**Tanaka:** SO I WAS OUT WITH KIYOKO AND YACHI TODAY

**Hinata:** YACHIII

**Tanaka:** YES

**Tanaka:** SHE’S THE CUTEST LOVE HER

**Tanaka:** BUT WE WERE ALL GETTING ICE CREAM AND SHE WAS LIKE

**Tanaka:** I’M SO HAPPY YOU GUYS ARE TOGETHER I REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE IN HIGH SCHOOL AND KIYOKO WOULD TELL ME ABOUT HOW SHE THOUGHT YOU WERE COOL AND SWEET. SHE HAD A PRETTY BIG CRUSH ON YOU AND I THOUGHT IT WAS AWESOME THAT SHE WAS SO GOOD AT HIDING IT

**Tanaka:** AND KIYOKO WAS BLUSHING SO MUCH OMG THE IMAGE IS JUST BURNED IN MY BRAIN I’M SO IN LOVE AH SHE’S SO CUTE

**Nishinoya:** SHUT UP WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME THAT THAT’S SO CUTE

**Tanaka:** BRO I KNOW SHE’S JUST THE LOVE OF MY LIFE

**Sugawara:** AHHH THATS ADORABLE IM LITERALLY DOING 5 BACKFLIPS

**Kenma:** WELL I'M DOING 6

**Sugawara:** THEY’RE IN LOVE

**Tanaka:** OKAY WELL I HAVE TO CLEAN MY ROOM UP A BIT BECAUSE SHE’S COMING OVER I JUST NEEDED TO SCREAM ABOUT THAT

**Nishinoya:** SO CUTE SO CUTE RYUUUU

**-**

**Oikawa:** So haha

**Oikawa:** Asking for a friend

**Iwaizumi:** Oh great

**Oikawa:** NO NO TRUST ME PLEASE IWA-CHAN THIS IS FOR A REAL FRIEND

**Oikawa:** Okay so one of my friends is pretty insecure.

**Oikawa:** His boyfriend is really friendly which is super unexpected and like he kinda knew that but he doesn’t like that his boyfriend still hangs out with his ex.

**Oikawa:** It makes him feel like, for lack of better term, shit?

**Sugawara:** aw I feel bad that that’s happening

**Oikawa:** me tooooo

**Akaashi:** Has this friend talked to their boyfriend about it?

**Oikawa:** Kinda? But like it’s always really short because they don’t want to sound annoying

**Akaashi:** Well maybe tell them to talk to him. Communication is key! And people sometimes don’t even realize what they’re doing unless someone tells them.

**Sugawara:** I’m guessing you know the boyfriend?

**Oikawa:** correct!

**Sugawara:** You can use that to help your friend out. Give him a push in the right direction?

**Oikawa:** Smart smart smart

**Oikawa:** Okay thank you both!! ☺️

**-**

**Hinata** and  **Oikawa**

**Oikawa:** You need to talk to Tobio

**Oikawa:** Or I can talk to him first? Whichever you want

**Hinata:** Idk i don’t want to annoy him but I don’t want him to break up with me but what if I annoy him and he breaks up with me???? UGHHH

**Oikawa:** Okay calm down Shouyou

**Oikawa:** If it’s something like this he shouldn’t find it annoying.

**Oikawa:** Shouyou it’s important to you so it should be important to him

**Hinata:** I guess you’re right

**Hinata:** it’ll be better if I talk to him.

**Hinata:** Ah I’m nervous!!

**Oikawa:** I believe in youuu

**Hinata:** ahh I’m doing it now.

-

**Hinata** and  **Kageyama**

**Hinata:** Yamayama

**Kageyama:** lol hi 🧡

**Hinata:** HI

**Hinata:** Um i have to talk to you about something

**Hinata:** It’s been bothering me

**Kageyama:** Okay. I can come over right now

**Hinata:** NO

**Kageyama:** I can call you then?

**Hinata:** NO I CAN JUST TEXT YOU

**Kageyama:** Oh okay. Go ahead

**Hinata:** Okay so

**Hinata:** I feel so like

**Hinata:** Blehh?

**Kageyama:** Are you sick??

**Hinata:** No I’m just bleh

**Kageyama:** I don’t get it

**Hinata:** Okay um

**Hinata:** Have you hung out with Atsumu lately?

**Kageyama:** We got lunch yesterday but we didn’t really hang out

**Hinata:** AHH SEE THAT MAKES ME FEEL BLEH

**Hinata:** Like idk I feel weird when you two are together.

**Hinata:** What if you realize you still like him? 

**Hinata:** And then you break up with me??

**Hinata:** Nevermind I’m being dumb it’s fine

**Kageyama:** No Shouyou finish what you were saying

**Kageyama:** Shouyou

**Kageyama:** Are you really ignoring me

_ Incoming call from Tobio  _ 🧡🖤

_ Call declined _

_ Incoming call from Tobio  _ 🧡🖤

_ Call declined _

_ Incoming facetime from Tobio  _ 🧡🖤

_ Facetime declined _

**Hinata:** I’m being dramatic it’s fine lol

**Kageyama:** You’re not, Shouyou

**Kageyama:** Just talk to me

**Hinata:** Fine okay

**Hinata:** Idk idk I get upset when you’re with Atsumu. Idk

**Hinata:** He’s better at so many things then me and like idk you guys dated before. He was your first and just ughhh idk how to say any of this

**Hinata:** I just feel so insecure because like what you guys had got so much farther than where we are???

**Hinata:** And AGH IDK this is hard

**Hinata:** I just wanna be with you forever

**Hinata:** Or for as long as you wanna be with me!

**Hinata:** AGH KAGEYAMA THIS IS SO STUPID I’M SORRY.

**Kageyama:** Don’t apologize

**Hinata:** I feel dumb

**Kageyama:** You shouldn’t

**Kageyama:** I’m really sorry that I made you feel like that

**Kageyama:** I promise that I don’t like Atsumu like that

**Kageyama:** And I never think about leaving you

**Kageyama:** I’ve liked you for so long Hinata omg

**Kageyama:** Me and Atsumu broke up because we didn’t really care about our relationship

**Kageyama:** We were basically just friends that would kiss

**Kageyama:** and fuck I guess

**Hinata:** THAT’S WHAT WE ARE STUPID

**Kageyama:** IDIOT BUT I’M ACTUALLY IN LOVE WITH YOU

**Kageyama:** ME AND ATSUMU GOT INTO AN ARGUMENT AND DIDN’T EVEN BOTHER TO PATCH THINGS UP

**Kageyama:** IF ME AND YOU EVER FOUGHT I’D TRY MY HARDEST TO FIX IT BECAUSE I LOVE YOU STUPID

**Hinata:** AH YOU’RE SO EMBARRASSING

**Kageyama:** I JUST LOVE YOU

**Hinata:** SHUT UP

**Kageyama:** YOU SHUT UP

**Kageyama:** YOU BETTER BE HOME BECAUSE I’M COMING OVER 

**-**

**Hinata** changed the group name to  _ TOBIOTOBIOTOBIO _

**Kageyama** changed the group name to  _ SHOUYOUSHOUYOUSHOUYOU _

**Oikawa** _ left the chat _

**Iwaizumi** _ added Oikawa to the chat _

**Oikawa:** gross

**Hinata:** I’M IN LOVE

**Kenma:** HE’S IN LOVE

**Kageyama:** I’M MORE IN LOVE

**Hinata:** NO

**Kageyama:** YES

**Hinata:** NO

**Kageyama:** YES

**Oikawa:** Why

**Iwaizumi:** Because they’re in love, can’t you read??


	92. Why did this happen. My brain conceived this like I just typed this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akaashi: I would like you all to know that Bokuto and I just caught up with the chat.
> 
> Akaashi: Bokuto is blushing

**Tanaka** added  **Kiyoko Shimizu** to the group

**Asahi:** Kiyoko!

**Kiyoko:** Asahi!

**Tanaka:** 💕

**Kiyoko: 💕**

**Kiyoko:** but

**Kiyoko:** Ryuunosuke, I thought I said no more group chats 🙃

**Kiyoko** left the group

**Tanaka:** NO PLEASE

**Tanaka** added  **Kiyoko** to the group

**Tanaka:** Please just stay for a little bit.

**Kiyoko:** Maybe

**Nishinoya:** KIYOKO

**Kiyoko:** Noya

**Kuroo:** Ah, Kiyoko

**Kuroo:** Yamamoto still cries over you

**Kiyoko:** Well

**Kiyoko:** That’s a bit awkward haha

**Tanaka:** 😎

**Kuroo:** Tears of defeat but also tears of happiness.

**Kiyoko:** Was that supposed to make it less embarrassing?

**Tanaka:** I miss him

**Tanka:** NOYA WHEN IS YOUR NEXT FREE WEEKEND

**Nishinoya:** ummm

**Nishinoya:** Two weekends from now

**Tanaka:** PERFECT

**Tanaka:** WE’RE GOING TO TOKYO

**Nishinoya:** CAN ASAHI COME

**Tanaka:** OF COURSE WHAT WHY DID YOU EVEN ASK

**Tanka:** Kiyoko you’re coming too

**Kiyoko:** yay!

**Tanaka:** Im gonna text Tora right now!!!!!

**Asahi:** Aw, a couples trip

**Akaashi:** I want to go on a trip

**Bokuto:** BABY LETS GO

**Akaashi:** You want to?

**Bokuto:** YEAH I’LL GO WHEREVER YOU WANNA GO!!!

**Akaashi:** Okay! Lets plan tonight 💖

**Bokuto:** WOOOO

-

**Bokuto:** So

**Bokuto:** I’ve been doing some thinking

**Bokuto:** Maid costumes right?? Akaashi in a maid costume

**Akaashi:** Bokuto…

**Akaashi:** I told you to stop consulting group chats and come to me instead if you wanna try something

**Bokuto:** NO NO NOT LIKE THAT AKAASHI NOT LIKE SEXUAL AT LEAST NOT RIGHT NOW

**Bokuto:** WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT I CAN'T THINK AHHH

**Kenma:** ew are you okay??

**Bokuto:** OKAY OKAY JUST GIVE ME A SECOND I NEED TO RECOLLECT MYSELF

**Oikawa:** Akaashi, your power.

**Akaashi:** I didn’t mean to get him started

**Bokuto:** Okay so

**Bokuto:** I was thinking of when we had that school festival and we did a maid and butler cafe.

**Akaashi:** That was really fun

**Bokuto:** You looked so cute!! I think I have some pictures saved

**Yamaguchi:** You guys did one of those???

**Akaashi:** Yeah. We drew names to see who was a maid and who was a butler

**Akaashi:** Bokuto looked so handsome 🥰

**Hinata:** I wanna see Kageyama in a maid costume

**Tsukishima:** Ew

**Yamaguchi:** HAHA TSUKKI LITERALLY JUST SHIVERED

**Hinata:** No I think he’d look super cute

**Hinata:** Like, he’d be all shy omgomg

**Oikawa:** Wait Shouyou

**Oikawa:** You’re onto something

**Kenma:** That actually sounds so cute

**Sugawara:** Tsukishima, you’re just so incorrect. Kageyama would look so cute and you know it

**Yamaguchi:** Guess we’ll just have to

**Yamaguchi:** 😋buy one and see

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi what

**Yamaguchi:** It sounds cute

**Kageyama:** Do I get a say in this?

**Oikawa:** No

**Kuroo:** Absolutely not

**Kageyama:** Okay then 

**Bokuto:** _ Attached Image _

**Bokuto:** _ Attached Image _

**Bokuto:** _ Attached Image _

**Bokuto:** I have a bunch of selfies too lol

**Akaashi:** ah so handsome

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI YOU LOOK SO CUTE IN THESE AHH

**Sugawara:** I’m sorry but Bokuto

**Sugawara:** You’re telling me that you saw Akaashi dressed like that AND DIDN’T THINK OF ANYTHING SEXUAL

**Sugawara:** HE HAS STOCKINGS ON BOKUTO

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI WEARS SKIRTS SOMETIMES SO I DIDNT THINK ANYTHING LIKE THST

**Bokuto:** BUT STOP BECAUSE NOW I AM

**Akaashi:** lol just stop thinking about it

**Bokuto:** I CANT OMG

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI YOURE SO HOT HOW HOW HOW

**Akaashi:** lmaoo stoppppp

**Bokuto:** I CANT I CANT

**Kuroo:** You’re being a freak

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI PLEASE COME OVER AFTER YOUR CLASSES

**Akaashi:** Okay lol 

**Nishinoya:** 😍 we love to see it YES BOKUTO AND AKAASHI

-

**Kageyama:** Guys look

**Kageyama** added  **Kindaichi** and  **Kunimi** to the group

**Kindaichi:** Kageyama what

**Kageyama:** It’s all of my friends! And Hinata

**Hinata:** Are we not friends??

**Kageyama:** We are but you’re my boyfriend too!

**Kindaichi:** BOYFRIEND WHAT KAGEYAMA WHAT

**Hinata:** yeah??? WHAT ABOUT IT??

**Oikawa:** Why are you yelling hinata?

**Kindaichi:** YOURE DATING THE SHRIMP

**Hinata:** YEAH SO WHAT

**Kageyama:** Yeah, we’ve been dating for a while now

**Sugawara:** Hinata, you aren’t intimidating

**Kageyama:** He’s on my lap lol

**Kageyama:** He’s sulking :-(

**Iwaizumi:** That might be me and Oikawa’s fault oops

**Oikawa:** ???

**Iwaizumi:** may or may not have told them about your old crush on Kageyama oops

**Kindaichi:** IWAIZUMI WHY

**Kindaichi:** AND I TOLD YOU IT WASN’T A CRUSH

**Kunimi:** It was a crush, there’s no point in lying about something so dumb

**Hinata:** WHY DID YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM

**Kindaichi:** YOU SHOULD KNOW, YOU’RE HIS BOYFRIEND

**Hinata:** I DO KNOW BECAUSE I LOVE HIM BUT WHY DID YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM

**Kindaichi:** IT WAS IN MIDDLE SCHOOL AND I THOUGHT HE WAS CUTE

**Hinata:** DONT SAY THAT ABOUT MY BOYFRIEND

**Kindaichi:** YOU ASKED ME SO I ANSWERED

**Kageyama:** um please stop

**Kageyama:** This is embarrassing for me

**Tsukishima:** So many idiots in one chat

**Kageyama:** Hinata that was so long ago. Kindaichi has a boyfriend

**Kunimi:** lol

**Kindaichi:** WHAT HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT

**Kageyama:** Me and Kunimi text a lot!

**Kunimi:** lol

**Oikawa:** Tobio is so scary

**Hinata:** Middle school Tobio especially

**Oikawa:** YEAH WHAT’S THAT ABOUT

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up

-

**Kageyama:** I have a really important question

**Daichi:** What is it?

**Kageyama:** So me and Hinata were

**Daichi:** Kageyama?

**Iwaizumi:** ?

**Oikawa:** What were you guys doing?

**Kageyama:** sorry! I thought he was waking up

**Kageyama:** So we just finished

**Kageyama:** … 

**Sugawara:** ??

**Sugawara:** Fucking

**Kageyama:** yeah

**Kageyama:** and Hinata wanted to try something new and we were excited

**Kageyama:** but now I feel bad? He’s asleep but I still feel terrible 

**Sugawara:** Tobio, what do you mean? Are you guys okay???

**Kageyama:** yeah but like

**Kageyama:** I think I really hurt his ass

**Daichi:** I mean that happens sometimes. Just be careful and listen to what he tells you 😊

**Kageyama:** no no no not like that

**Kageyama:** Like I spanked him

**Kageyama:** And I went to get him some water after and he was laying on his tummy because he said his ass hurt.

**Kageyama:** And he was crying when we were like doing it

**Sugawara:** is it okay to talk about it in the groupchat?

**Kageyama:** yeah, why not?

**Sugawara:** just wanted to make sure

**Sugawara:** Did he tell you to stop?

**Kageyama:** no but like, he was crying. And I kept asking him if he wanted to stop but he kept telling me to keep going

**Daichi:** and you wanted to do it too?

**Kageyama:** I did!

**Daichi:** so then I don’t see a problem

**Sugawara:** Yeah, as long as it was okay with both of you I wouldn’t feel too bad. Hinata probably knows his limits and I’m sure you do too.

**Kageyama:** but it looks kinda bad

**Sugawara:** Are there any bruises or anything?

**Kageyama:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** Tobio

**Sugawara:** Kageyama

**Sugawara:** sweet sweet baby boy Tobio

**Sugawara:** why did you send a picture? Why do you have a picture?

**Kageyama:** he wanted to see how it looked

**Kageyama:** And you asked about the bruises so I showed you

**Tsukishima:** you’re an idiot and I hate being your friend

**Kageyama:** :-(

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki stop! This is a serious moment

**Sugawara:** okay well, I wouldn’t worry too much! And as long as you’re both okay then it’s fine. 

**Sugawara:** experimenting is totally fine and really fun

**Sugawara:** don’t be afraid to ask questions Tobio! Me and Daichi are always here for you and we’ll answer any questions to our best abilities!

**Daichi:** Exactly. It’s good that you ask questions. Maybe just not in the groupchat next time.

**Kageyama:** I didn’t really know who to ask first so I just asked everyone. But I’ll come to you and suga first next time!! :-))))

**Kageyama:** okay well I’m tired so I’m gonna cuddle Shou and sleep🧡🧡. Thanks suga and Daichi!

**Daichi:** Any time! Goodnight

**Sugawara:** Goodnight Tobio 💗💗

**Nishinoya:** I-

**Nishinoya:** that was weirdly sweet?

**Nishinoya:** weirdly embarrassing?

**Nishinoya:** I-

**Nishinoya:** OMG HE SPANKED HINATA OMG

**Sugawara:** lol Noya

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Kageyama definitely FUCKS _

**-**

**Kenma and Hinata**

**Kenma:** soooo

**Kenma:** spanking?

**Kenma:** would you do it again?

**Hinata:** YES OF COURSE! It was really fun and OMGOMG Kageyama was so hot omg Kenma you should’ve heard the things he was saying to me and it hurt but I really liked it omgomgomgomg

**Hinata:** I can still kinda feel the sting and it hurts a little to sit so I’m probably gonna bruise

**Hinata:** but it’s okay! I like when he leaves marks

**Hinata:** wait wait

**Hinata:** did I tell you about it?? I don’t remember.

**Kenma:** have you not seen the groupchat?

**Hinata:** UM WHAT

**Kenma:** OOPS AHAHA

-

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA ARE YOU CRAZY

**Kageyama:** what

**Hinata:** WHY DID YOU TALK ABOUT THAT HERE

**Hinata:** AND THE PICTURE WHAT

**Kageyama:** The more I look at the picture the more hot it is

**Kenma:** UM WOW KAGEYAMA CALM DOWN OR ELSE IM CARTWHEELING ACROSS THE COUNTRY

**Hinata:** WHY ARE YOU LIKE THAT

**Kageyama:** I was worried

**Hinata:** BUT WHEN I TALK ABOUT SEX IN THE GROUP ITS EMBARRASSING??

**Kageyama:** YEAH BECAUSE YOU DO IT ON ACCIDENT IDIOT 

**Hinata:** IM SO EMBARRASSED 

**Kageyama:** WHY

**Hinata:** EVERYONE SAW MY BUTT

**Kenma:** butt

**Oikawa:** butt

**Hinata:** STOP THAT IM EMBARRASSED 

**Kageyama:** SORRY JEEZ I DIDNT KNOW YOUD BE EMBARRASSED 

**Hinata:** OMGOMG

**Hinata:** WHATEVER JUST COME BACK IN THE ROOM AND BRING ME AN EXTRA PILLOW

**Kageyama:** Okay!!🧡🧡

**Hinata:** 🖤🖤

**Kindaichi:** so weird

**Kunimi:** that could’ve been you Yuutarou

**Kindaichi:** stop

**Iwaizumi:** is that Kunimi being petty?

**Kunimi** left the group

**Oikawa** added  **Kunimi** to the group

**Akaashi:** I would like you all to know that Bokuto and I just caught up with the chat.

**Akaashi:** Bokuto is blushing

**Bokuto:** AKAASHII

**Nishinoya:** I’ve waited a good amount of time

**Nishinoya:** KAGEYAMA FUCKS KAGEYAMA FUCKS WOW NICE NICE

**Nishinoya:** ALSO WOW AMAZING CONSENT KINGS DIACHI SUGA AND KAGEYAMA LOVE THAT AMAZING INCREDIBLE

**Asahi:** Yuu lmaooo stop

**Tanaka:** CONSENT KINGS CONSENT KINGS

**Kiyoko:** Can I leave?

**Tanaka:** Please don’t

**Atsumu:** Um I’m ???

**Atsumu:** I’ve learned so many new things

**Oikawa:** AH HES BACK

**Atsumu:** Tobio 😍😍

**Hinata:** NO NO

**Kageyama:** no no

**Atsumu:😜😜**

**Hinata:** NO TOBIO COME CUDDLE ME RIGHT NOW

**Kageyama:** YOURE THE ONE THAT MOVED FROM ME


	93. This episode is so short and so stupid and literally nothing happens like it's actually boring but whatever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: Let’s fight
> 
> Oikawa: We’re fighting

_ Kageyama definitely FUCKS _

**Akaashi:** I know it’s like 3am

**Akaashi:** But I can’t sleep and I’ve just been up thinking for the past few hours

**Kenma:** Oh gosh

**Kenma:** Are you okay? Do you want to call me?

**Akaashi:** No, I’m fine! 

**Akaashi:** Not that kind of thinking

**Akaashi:** Like

**Akaashi:** I want to get married so bad omg

**Akaashi:** Like. Imagine me.

**Akaashi:** But married

**Akaashi:** Happily living in a little house in the country with Bokuto with a dog or something 

**Akaashi:** Omg omg omg omg

**Kenma:** Omfg shut up 

**Kenma:** That’s so cute

**Akaashi:** I WANT TO GET MARRIED 

**Akaashi:** I WANT TO GET MARRIED SO BAD

**Bokuto:** OMG AKAASHI

**Bokuto:** You want to get married? 😵🥺

**Akaashi:** Yes!

**Akaashi:** I can’t stop thinking about it! BOKUTO I WANT TO GET MARRIED

**Kenma:** Omfg this is so cute

**Kenma:** I’m wAKING UP KURO AS I SPEAK 

**Kuroo:** OMG

**Kuroo:** GET MARRIED

**Bokuto:** LET’S GET MARRIED LET’S GET MARRIED

**Akaashi:** YES YES YES

**Bokuto:** After you graduate ❤️

**Akaashi:** You

**Akaashi:** You

**Akaashi:** Just broke my heart??

**Bokuto:** NO STOP 

**Bokuto:** IT’LL BE BETTER TO DO IT WHEN YOU DON’T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT SCHOOL 

**Akaashi:** BOKUTO I HAVE SO MUCH LONGER

**Bokuto:** 2 YEARS ISN’T THAT LONG

**Akaashi:** Bokutooooooo :’(

**Bokuto:** Akaaaashiiii :’(

**Akaashi:** Call meeeee

**Bokuto:** OKAY!!

\--

**Sugawara:** Can we talk about how this emoji isn’t used enough 💝

**Sugawara:** Like it’s literally so cute and NO ONE USES IT

**Oikawa:** That emoji scares me

**Sugawara** : WHY

**Sugawara:** IT’S SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** IT’S GOT A LITTLE RIBBON

**Sugawara:** IT’S LIKE A PRESENT 

**Oikawa:** AHAHA SUGA YOU’RE INSANE

**Akaashi:** I love that emoji 

**Akaashi:** 💝

**Bokuto:** ME TOO IT REMINDS ME OF AKAASHI

**Bokuto:** 💝💝

**Akaashi:** Aww

**Sugawara:** IT’S SO CUTE IT’S SO CUTE

**Kunimi:** I love that emoji

**Kindaichi:** Ew

**Kunimi:** ??? Idk what I ever did to you

**Kenma:** I never even think about clicking that emoji

**Kenma:** Idk why I just 

**Kenma:** Avoid it

**Sugawara:** Maybe it’s because you hate cute things Kenma

**Kenma:** HAHA WHAT

**Kuroo:** Kenma can’t hate cute things bc he IS a cute thing

**Kenma:** Good reason to hate them 

**Kuroo:** NOOOO

**Sugawara:** Kenma don’t talk like that about yourself

**Sugawara:** You’re so 💝

**Kenma:** Awww 

**Tsukishima:** This conversation is so stupid 

\--

**Oikawa:** SO

**Oikawa:** I JUST WOKE UP TO A SORE THROAT FOR THE THIRD DAY IN A ROW??

**Oikawa:** This isn’t fair 

**Oikawa:** It’s swollen too

**Oikawa:** Whyy did this happen to me :-(

**Oikawa:** I feel horrible

**Iwaizumi:** I didn’t know you were still feeling sick??

**Iwaizumi:** I wouldn’t have left to go see my brother if you were

**Oikawa:** It’s okay Iwa-chan! You don’t have to stay home to take care of me

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll be home tomorrow

**Oikawa:** BUT IWA-CHAN YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE GONE FOR LIKE A WEEK

**Iwaizumi:** It’s okay baby

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll see you tomorrow 

**Kuroo:** I’m going to cry

**Kageyama:** Omg omg omg me too

\--

**Kuroo:** Kenma is insane 

**Sugawara:** Why?

**Akaashi:** No he isn’t wtf

**Kuroo:** NO AKAASHI YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND

**Kuroo:** So today I didn’t have classes or work, so I drove him to class and he fell asleep in my car on the way there

**Kuroo:** AND SO WHEN WE GOT THERE I WOKE HIM UP 

**Kuroo:** By kissing his cute face of course

**Kuroo:** AND THEN HE GOES TO CLASS?? AND FALLS ASLEEP IN CLASS??

**Kuroo:** Someone had to literally wake him up to leave lmfao

**Kuroo:** AND THEN HE COMES HOME

**Kuroo:** And I was on the couch and he came over and sat on my lap and I WAS KISSING HIM BECAUSE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH AND I MISSED HIM 

**Kuroo:** AND HE FELL ASLEEP AGAIN

**Sugawara:** Omfg

**Sugawara:** LMAO WHY IS HE SO TIRED

**Kuroo:** IDK 

**Hinata:** I feel like that’s not normal

**Oikawa:** No, he’s a freak 

**Kenma:** Stoppp I ws so tired

**Kenma:** I’m sitll tired

**Kuroo:** Baby you just woke up

**Kenma:** Shut up

**Hinata:** Omg he said baby

**Oikawa:** What? Lmao

**Kuroo:** Oh sorry Hinata

**Kuroo:** *Kitten you just woke up

**Hinata:** I hate you

**Kenma:** Idccc 

**Kenma:** Tetsuuuu i’m going to bed

**Kuroo:** KENMA IT’S 7PM

**Kenma:** Sorry I can’t hear you, I’m sleeping

**Kuroo:** Oh my god

**Sugawara:** Oh my god

**Oikawa:** Oh my god

-

**Atsumu** _ added  _ **Miya Osamu** _ to the chat _

**Sugawara:** What

**Daichi:** Who is that

**Kuroo:** UNKNOWN NUMBER UNKNOWN NUMBER

**Kageyama:** Oh, hi Osamu!

**Osamu:** Hi Kageyama

**Iwaizumi:** Hi! How are you doing omg?

**Osamu:** Good!! 

**Kenma:** Omg the famous Osamu

**Osamu:** I’m famous?

**Kuroo:** Your past with Iwaizumi 😵

**Osamu:** Oh yeah lmao

**Osamu:** That was so long ago

**Osamu:** HAHA IWAIZUMI DO YOU STILL BLUSH WHENEVER SOMEONE COMPLIMENTS YOU

**Iwaizumi:** SHUT UP 

**Iwaizumi:** I’LL SMACK YOU

**Osamu:** Have fun trying, blushy bitch 😌

**Osamu** _ has been removed from the chat _

**Atsumu:** Rip 😲 fly high brother 👼❤️

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA

**Sugawara:** WHERE DID HE GO

**Sugawara:** HE WAS SO FUN

**Oikawa:** Have fun being blocked Osamu 💋

**Iwaizumi:** IDIOT LMAO

**Atsumu:** HAHA

**Atsumu:** UNBLOCK HIM

**Iwaizumi:** UNBLOCK HIM

**Tanaka:** UNBLOCK HIM

**Nishinoya:** UNBLOCK HIM

**Oikawa:** NOOO NEVER

**Kunimi:** Keep him blocked keep him blocked

**Oikawa:** KUNIMI????

**Kunimi:** 😌

**Kindaichi:** When he had a crush on Iwaizumi 🙂

**Kunimi:** So you want to die?

**Kageyama:** I remember that omg

**Oikawa:** UM???

**Oikawa:** KUNIMI DON’T MAKE ME BLOCK YOU

**Kunimi:** STOP IT WAS FOREVER AGO

**Kindaichi:** YOU STILL CALL HIM HANDSOME

**Kunimi:** STOP

**Oikawa:** KUNIMI I???

**Oikawa:** I’M HEARTBROKEN

**Atsumu:** AHAHAHA

-

**Iwaizumi** added  **Osamu** to the chat

**Osamu:** I’M BACK

**Oikawa:** You’re on thin ice

**Osamu:** Oh no

**Osamu:** Anyways Blushy Hajime wya??

**Oikawa:** Let’s fight

**Oikawa:** We’re fighting

**Osamu:** I’d rather not 💝

**Sugawara:** OSAMU YOU’RE MY FAVORITE

**Akaashi:** Oh em gee emoji twins 💝


	94. Boring as fuck, not even worth a read

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: HE THINKS KENMA IS CUTE
> 
> Yaku: so do I, idiot! We all think Kenma is cute

_ Kageyama definitely FUCKS _

**Daichi:** Suga

**Daichi:** babyyyy

**Sugawara:** Daichi

**Sugawara:** babyyyy

**Daichi:** Suga 

**Daichi:** beautiful Sugaaaaa

**Sugawara:** handsome Daichiiii

**Daichi:** Sugaaaa

**Daichi:** angelll

**Tsukishima:** Okay please stop

**Kuroo:** i think it’s cute

**Kageyama:** me too

**Sugawara:** Look guys!

**Sugawara:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** That’s the place me and Daichi are gonna stay next semester!

**Kageyama:** awww yay

**Oikawa:** SHUT UP

**Sugawara:** lmaooo

**Daichi:** Yes omg and the place is pet friendly too

**Kuroo:** Oh? What do you guys wanna get

**Daichi:** a husky!

**Sugawara:** A husky!

**Oikawa:** THATS SO CUTE OMG

**Kageyama:** I love dogs

**Daichi:** You’ll be the first person we introduce our dog to!

**Kageyama:** :-) 

**Sugawara:** You’re so cute omg

**Sugawara:** Can’t you be cute like Tobio, Tsukishima?

**Tsukishima:** Please don’t ask me scary questions

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki is cute!

**Tsukishima:** I’m not

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki is the cutest person ever!

**Tsukishima:** No

**Tsukishima:** I can’t be the cutest person ever because that’s what you are

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI OMGKJASNFSDF

**Tsukishima:** shut up

-

**Kenma** added  **Yaku** to the group

**Kenma:** Yaku I miss you and I want to see your cute face

**Yaku:** Aw Kenma I miss you more and I want to see your cute face

**Yaku:** My schedule is so hectic right now haha

**Kuroo:** Bold of you to think you can show your face around here after pulling a stunt like that

**Yaku:** what

**Kuroo:** Your “boyfriend” used to have a crush on my boyfriend

**Kuroo:** HE THINKS KENMA IS CUTE

**Yaku:** so do I, idiot! We all think Kenma is cute

**Kuroo:** Not allowed!!

**Yaku:** You’re stupid

**Kuroo:** Lev’s stupid!

**Yaku:** DON’T BE RUDE TO MY BOYFRIEND BECAUSE HE THINKS YOUR BOYFRIEND IS CUTE

**Kuroo:** WHY DO YOU THINK IT’S OKAY FOR YOUR BOYFRIEND TO THINK OTHER GUYS ARE CUTE

**Yaku:** BECAUSE KENMA IS CUTE AND WE ALL KNOW THAT SO STOP BEING STUPID

**Kuroo:** DON’T TALK ABOUT MY BOYFRIEND LIKE THAT

**Yaku:** YOU CALLED MY BOYFRIEND STUPID

**Kuroo:** BECAUSE HE IS

**Yaku:** KENMA IS SO CUTE KENMA KENMA KENMA YOURE ADORABLE MY CUTE CUTE KENMA

**Kuroo:** YAKU STOP OR ELSE YOURE DEAD

**Yaku:** THEN DON’T CALL LEV STUPID

**Kenma:** This is scary

**Sugawara:** Yaku be my friend

**Yaku:** Yes! I’ll be friends with all of the cute people here 

**Kuroo:** KICK HIM OUT SOMEONE HE’S OUT OF CONTROL

**Kenma:** you’re out of control

**Kuroo:** KENMA NO IM CRYING 

**Kuroo:** KENMA BABY PLEASE

**Kenma:** lol shut up 💕

**Kenma:** Yaku Yaku Yaku

**Yaku:** Kenma Kenma Kenma

**Kenma:** Oikawa Oikawa Oikawa

**Oikawa:** Me me me

**Kenma:** Suga Suga Suga

**Kenma:** Akaashi Akaashi Akaashi

**Kenma:** Lets all hang out

**Kenma:** I wanna see you guys

**Kenma:** I miss youuuu

**Akaashi:** Aw okay, when??

**Kenma:** Whenever just please I want it to happen

**Kenma:** I just want us all to be together

**Sugawara:** You’re so cute today lol

**Oikawa:** YES OMG

**Kuroo:** What about ME???

**Kenma:** no

**Kuroo:** KENMA BABY PLEASE I’LL DIE WITHOUT YOU. YOU 'RE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE

**Yaku:** So anyways

**Kuroo:** STOP THAT

**-**

**Kageyama:** No one get mad at me

**Sugawara:** What happened?

**Kageyama:** I’m skipping the rest of my classes

**Hinata:** It’s thursday. You only have two more

**Kageyama:** I feel guilty but like, i just can’t go

**Daichi:** Is something wrong?

**Kageyama:** Idk I just don’t feel like it. I just feel down idk

**Sugawara:** Just be sure to do the homework so you aren’t behind. Do you know anyone in those classes?

**Kageyama:** Yeah, they’re gonna send me the slides I missed

**Daichi:** If you need help just let us know!

**Daichi:** Who would get mad at you lol

**Kageyama:** idk you guys might call me dumb

**Sugawara:** for having a bad day? Of course not!

**Kageyama:** Shouyou can you come over after your class?

**Hinata:** I was just gonna ask if I could! See you in an hour!! 💕

**-**

**Hinata:** AHHH

**Oikawa:** ???

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA IS

**Hinata:** He’S SLEEPING HES SLEEPINH

**Hinata:** ON MY CHEST LIKE WE WERE JUST LAYING HERE

**Hinata:** AND LIKE TALKING QUIETLY AND I COULD TELL HE WAS GETTINF SLEEPY BECAUSE HIS RESPONSES TURNED INTO LITTLE HUMS AND HE

**Hinata:** HE

**Hinata:** HE JUST

**Kenma:** SPIT IT OUT, I MUST KNOW

**Hinata:** He LIKE TURNED TO ME AND GAVE THE MOST SOFT AND SLEEPY SMILE AND LIKE KISSED ME SO SOFTLY AND JUST KINDA PUT HIS HEAD ON MY CHEST AND WRAPPED HIS ARMS AROUND MY TUMMY AND IDK IDK HE’S JUST SLEEPING NOW

**Kenma:** AHHH I NEED A PICTURE

**Hinata:** OKAY OKAY IM SHAKING IM SHAKING KENMA

**Hinata:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** AHH HE LOOKS SO SO SO CUTE

**Kenma:** My heart literally just exploded and the pieces of my heart made multiple tiny hearts

**Kuroo:** SO CUTE HE’S SO CUTE

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN IWA-CHAN 

**Sugawara:** OH OH OH OH OH OMG OMGOMG I CAN'T LOOK AT THAT YOU’RE BOTH SO CUTE

**Hinata:** WHat do i do WHAT DO I DO???

**Daichi:** Cuddle him!!! He was having a bad day.

**Hinata:** OKAY I WILL OMG OKAY I’LL TALK TO EVERYONE LATER

**Sugawara:** go GO GO GO OMG OMG

-

**Kageyama:** We’re awake!

**Tsukishima:** It’s almost midnight

**Kageyama:** I needed a reboot

**Hinata:** I’m hungry now lol

**Nishinoya:** I’m hungry too

**Kageyama:** I’m gonna make some food so you can come over. Asahi too

**Nishinoya:** He’s asleep but I’ll be over!

**Hinata:** I’m excited

**Tsukishima:** It’s so late

**Nishinoya:** Then why are you up

**Tsukishima:** it doesn’t matter

**Nishinoya:** It’s a simple question

**Tsukishima:** It’s a useless question

**Yamaguchi:** you can just be honest Tsukki, it’s cute

**Hinata:** Yeah, just be honest Tsukki

**Tsukishima:** no

**Yamaguchi:** We’re stargazing

**Tsukishima:** Why do you have to tell them everything

**Yamaguchi:** Because you’re cute lol

**Nishinoya:** I’m here and I forgot my jacket 

**Kageyama:** The door is unlocked!

-

**Atsumu and Kageyama**

**Atsumu:** We’re okay right?

**Kageyama:** Yeah? I think so

**Atsumu:** I mean like, we’re okay with like Shouyou, right?

**Kageyama:** Oh! Yeah, he’s fine. We talked it over and stuff :-)

**Atsumu:** I don’t want to mess anything up for you guys

**Atsumu:** Like, I don’t want to ruin what you guys have

**Atsumu:** I’d hate if I were the reason something happened

**Kageyama:** You’re okay! He’s still a little ?? but he’s your friend too and he really likes you.

**Atsumu:** Okay because I like

**Atsumu:** Need help?

**Kageyama:** Okay

**Atsumu:** I’ve been talking to Shinsuke and I just like him so much

**Atsumu:** He’s so cute omg

**Kageyama:** You’re talking so cute right now and it’s a little scary

**Atsumu:** Shut up, I wish we never dated

**Kageyama:** Lmaooo go on about Kita

**Atsumu:** I just can’t stop thinking about him ugh I just want to hug him all day

**Kageyama:** Does he like you?

**Atsumu:** I hope so

**Kageyama:** He probably likes you. You’re annoying but like

**Kageyama:** Fun annoying

**Atsumu:** Are you hitting on me Tobio?? 😳😳

**Kageyama:** You wish

**Atsumu:** anyways yeah, idk who to talk to this about and like I don’t want to make Shouyou upset if we talk a lot

**Kageyama:** He’s fine lol he’s with me right now

**Atsumu:** okay well, go spend time with him! I’m gonna Facetime Kita😎

**Kageyama:** Tell him you like him tell him you like him

**Atsumu:** Don’t tell me what to do 


	95. I'm dramatic but I'm not

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bokuto: AKAASHI IM RUNNING
> 
> Nishinoya: GO GET THAT SLOPPY TOPPY

_ Kageyama definitely FUCKS _

**Sugawara:** I want to cryyy

**Daichi:** what’s wrong??

**Sugawara:** my back is killing me 

**Sugawara:** go easy on me next time daddy😳😳

**Daichi:** Koushi

**Sugawara:** 😋

**Sugawara:** no but actually my back hurts so bad and like idk what to do but lay here and whine

**Akaashi:** try laying on a pillow?

**Sugawara:** I’ll try that

**Sugawara:** Daichi can you give me a massage later🥺🥺

**Daichi:** of course baby!!!

**Sugawara:** and then afterwards you can really break my back 🥴🥴🤤

**Daichi:** Sugawara

**Daichi:** I’m actually concerned about you…

**Sugawara:** fine fine

**Sugawara:** a warm bath and a massage then

**Daichi:** yes

**Akaashi:** maybe if you break his back the pain will cancel out

**Sugawara:** you’re a genius Akaashi

**Nishinoya:** Don’t hold back Daichi

**Daichi:** I’m going to work, stop talking to me.

**-**

**Kenma:** my brain is hurting

**Kenma:** Nishinoya, what do you and Asahi do when you hang out?

**Nishinoya:** other than 🥵🥵🍑🍆💦🦴👅🍆👅???

**Kenma:** hm

**Kenma:** Asahi, what do you and Nishinoya do when you hang out?

**Asahi:** I’m sure similar things to you and Kuroo. We just sorta hang out, chill together

**Asahi:** Noya loves going on dates so we go out a lot.

**Nishinoya:** Sometimes we’ll have movie marathons! And like, I think Asahi loves to hold hands

**Nishinoya:** So we just cuddle and he holds my hand and just kisses it randomly

**Nishinoya:** so cute asahi you’re so cute

**Asahi:** I didn’t realize I did that haha

**Nishinoya:** No no you do it all the time. Even when we’re like walking you just pick up my hand and kiss it

**Asahi:** You didn’t need to say all that

**Kenma:** NO HE DID HE DEFINITELY DID

**Asahi:** I’m so embarrassed

**Nishinoya:** ahh shy Asahi 

**Nishinoya:** Asahi, can you wait for me outside? I wanna see you when I get out of class.

**Asahi:** Yeah, I’ll get us coffee first

**Nishinoya:** 🥺

**Nishinoya:** YOURE MY DREAM MAN ASAHI

**Asahi:** Pay attention in class please

**Nishinoya:** I CANT BECAUSE I’M JUST GONNA THINK ABOUT YOU

**Kenma:** IVE NEVER FELT THIS ALIVE

**-**

**Sugawara:** My back has been healed!!

**Akaashi:** Because Daichi broke it and it cancelled out the pain?

**Sugawara:** No 😢 sadly

**Sugawara:** I slept on a pillow and daichi cuddled me so it feels a lot better now.

**Oikawa:** A great remedy

**Kenma:** Break his back daichi

**Sugawara:** Just blow my back out Daichi

**Daichi:** Koushi

-

**Akaashi:** Bokuto isn’t paying attention to me

**Yamaguchi:** Woah what

**Akaashi:** He stayed after to practice more

**Akaashi:** He asked if I’d set for him but i said i was “tired”

**Akaashi:** “Tired” as in I just wanted to go to his place and he could fuck my face until I’m crying

**Oikawa:** Oh my

**Akaashi:** But I guess he didn’t want that

**Kuroo:** do you always use code words?

**Akaashi:** nope

**Kuroo:** then what were you expecting

**Akaashi:** My boyfriend to follow me to HIS place???

**Akaashi:** “I’ll meet you there babe! I wanna play a little longer”

**Daichi:** Maybe he thought you were actually tired?

**Akaashi:** That’s a dumb thing to think

**Kuroo:** If I asked Kenma to set for me and he said he wanted to go home because he’s tired, I’d think he’s actually tired

**Kenma:** No no no, Akaashi is right.

**Kenma:** Bokuto knows that Akaashi will stay after no matter how long.

**Kenma:** It’s kinda weird that he wasn’t even sad that you left

**Akaashi:** EXACTLY KENMA THIS IS WHY I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU

**Kenma:** I’ll come over instead of Bokuto 😈

**Akaashi:** See you in a bit 🥴

**Kuroo:** Kenma

**Akaashi:** Maybe my sloppy toppy isn’t good enough for Bokuto 

**Sugawara:** I’m sure that’s not the case

**Akaashi:** He’s so confusing ughhh

**Akaashi:** Why isn’t he here

**Oikawa:** Who sulks while they’re horny? what is going on?

**Kenma:** It’s because Akaashi is used to having all of Bokuto’s attention lmao

**Akaashi:** Idk what youre talking about

**Kenma:** Attention whore attention whore

**Akaashi:** nope nope nope nope

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI IM SORRY DONT BE SAD

**Akaashi:** I dont want to talk to you

**Bokuto:** NO PLEASE LOOK

**Bokuto:** _ Attached Image _

**Bokuto:** I BOUGHT YOU CHOCOLATE BECAUSE I DIDN'T GET TO SPEND MUCH TIME WITH YOU TODAY OTHER THAN PRACTICE

**Bokuto:** I WANTED IT TO BE A SURPRISE AKAASHI PLEASE

**Akaashi:** Are you on your way home?

**Bokuto:** YES

**Akaashi:** I’ll see you when you get here 💗

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI IM RUNNING

**Nishinoya:** GO GET THAT SLOPPY TOPPY

**-**

**Akaashi:** My sloppy toppy is, in fact, god tier

**Tsukishima:** You all scare me so much

**Yamaguchi:** You’re literally laughing

**Akaashi:** _ Attached Image _

**Akaashi:** He’s asleep now

**Tanaka:** A post nut nap

**Akaashi:** Yes

**Akaashi:** He almost didn’t clean me up

**Kenma:** Do you not help him??

**Akaashi:** Not when he ✨cums inside✨

**Akaashi:** It’s the least he can do 🥰

**Oikawa:** KEIJI AHHAHA

**Tsukishima** left the group

**Sugawara:** Tsukishima never fails to prove that he’s the weakest here

**Nishinoya:** AKAASHI AMAZING GREAT JOB

**Nishinoya:** BOKUTO NICE NICE NICE

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ AKAASHI WOW BOKUTO KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK _

**Tanaka:** NOYA SHUT UP AHAHHA


	96. this episode is so stupid and kind of scary and literally full of kenma and akaashi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Atsumu: Ahhhh femboys
> 
> Atsumu: So 😍

**Akaashi** changed the group name to  _ Hello. I think everyone needs to know that Kenma is really embarrassing.  _

**Kageyama:** Aww the way you started that with hello

**Sugawara:** Ikr. So cute and polite

**Akaashi:** 🙂

**Oikawa:** I already knew Kenma was embarrassing

**Oikawa:** But omg what did he do?

**Kuroo:** Oh god

**Kenma:** I didn’t do ANUTHING Akaashi is just mean 

**Akaashi:** We’re watching the Princess and the Frog and the bug died 

**Kuroo:** Oh no. He’s not having a good time is he?

**Akaashi:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** KENMA WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE THAT

**Kenma:** IDK WHAT YOU EMAN

**Sugawara:** Aww, Kenma. Why are you crying that hard over the bug?

**Kenma:** DON’T BULLY ME

**Osamu:** The way he’s just hugging the couch pillow lol

**Akaashi:** He said he’s pretending it’s Kuroo lmao

**Kuroo:** BABY

**Kenma:** I DON’T THINK I NEED TO BE BULLIED BU YOU GUYS

**Kenma:** THIS IS TRAUMATIC 

**Oikawa:** No, you’re just sensitive 

**Kuroo:** He’s sensitive 🥺

**Akaashi:** He’s sensitive 🥱

**Sugawara:** THE YAWN LMAO

**Kenma:** IDJK WHY YOU GUYS ARE BEING SO MEAN

**Kenma:** IT’S SO SAD

**Daichi:** Not really

**Atsumu:** No..

**Asahi:** It’s kind of sad

**Sugawara:** No it isn’t, shut up. 

**Kenma:** Sorry I can’t hear you guys I’m too busy throwing up from crying sohard because it’s literlaly so sad 

**Akaashi:** Kuroo are you and Bokuto going to be here soon?

**Bokuto:** Yes

**Kuroo:** Yeah, we were actually on our way when you texted 

**Kuroo:** Don’t worry Kenma I’m coming 🥺

**Kuroo:** I’ll comfort you while you cry over a damn bug lol

**Kenma:** I HATE YOU

\--

**Akaashi:** I don’t need another iced coffee today.

**Bokuto:** NO YOU DON’T

**Akaashi:** But also I live RIGHT next to a coffee shop

**Akaashi:** Like, it’s not even a five minute walk

**Akaashi:** Lol but my heart is beating way too fast from how much caffeine I’ve had today and I don’t need anymore

**Bokuto:** NO YOU DON’T

**Akaashi:** But it’s right there. And it’s so good

**Akaashi:** But I’m so anxious about everything that I want to cry because coffee just made me more stressed and nervous 

**Akaashi:** But it’s so good

**Sugawara:** Akaashi you don’t need it

**Kageyama:** Akaashi no

**Akaashi:** BUT IT’S SO GOOD

**Oikawa:** AKAASHI NO

**Kenma:** AKAASHI LET’S GET COFFEE TOGETHER

**Kuroo:** KENMA YOU’VE ALREADY HAD TWO TODAY

**Kenma:** Idk why you’re so mean to me Tetsu

**Kuroo:** ????????

**Kuroo:** You have had TWO ICED COFFEES TODAY

**Kuroo:** AND COFFEE MAKES YOU SO ANXIOUS

**Kuroo:** WE WENT TO THE STORE AND YOU HAD TO TALK TO SOMEONE AND YOU STILL HAVEN’T STOPPED SHAKING

**Kuroo:** AND THAT WAS THREE HOURS AGO

**Kenma:** You just don’t want to SEE ME WINNING

**Kenma:** AKAASHI AKAASHI AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** KENMA KENMA KENMA KENMA

**Kenma:** LET’S GO

**Akaashi:** OKAY

**Kenma:** WE CAN WEAR MATCHING SKIRTS 

**Akaashi:** OKAY

**Bokuto:** NO

**Kuroo:** NO

**Kenma:** You guys hate us

**Kenma:** Bokuto, we aren’t friends anymore

**Kenma:** Tetsurou, I’m breaking up with you and moving out

**Akaashi:** Kuroo, we aren’t friends anymore

**Akaashi:** Bokuto, I’m breaking up with you and Kenma is moving in with me

**Bokuto:** :-O

**Kuroo:** :-O

**Tsukishima:** Why are you two so dramatic

**Akaashi:** Idk what you mean

  
  


\--

**Kenma:** So um…

**Kenma:** Inuoka thinks I’m dating Akaashi

**Kuroo:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** Lmao is he still on that?

**Akaashi:** What do you mean ‘he thinks’? You are

**Bokuto:** WHAT

**Akaashi:** I’m joking, Bokuto

**Kuroo:** I???

**Kuroo:** HE WALKED IN ON US MAKING OUT YESTERDAY??

**Kuroo:** I had my hand down your pants

**Daichi:** KUROO

**Hinata:** KENMA

**Oikawa:** KENMA??

**Kenma:** I’m not sure what you want from me

**Atsumu:** KUROO??

**Kuroo:** 😎 yeah

**Kuroo:** BUT ANYWAYS LIKE WHAT?

**Kuroo:** How does he think you’re dating Akaashi after seeing that??

**Kenma:** Idk so like 

**Kenma:** He came up to me idk idk idk

**Kenma:** And like I’ve been avoiding him since he wanted to move in together?? Because idk if he’s still waiting for an answer and I don’t know how to say no to people

**Kenma:** But I was leaving class and he like RAN UP TO ME and I got kind of scared because, like Kuro said, he kind of, um, caught us yesterday.

**Kenma:** But he started talking about how cute I am and how much he loves me and values me as a friend and then brought up Akaashi again. 

**Kenma:** And I tried to bring up Kuro and he just completely shrugged it off and kept talking about me

**Kenma:** And also Akaashi and how we would make such a beautiful couple

**Kuroo:** My hand was down your pants. 

**Kuroo:** MY TONGUE WAS IN YOUR MOUTH

**Kuroo:** HE WALKED IN AND SAW ALL OF IT

**Kuroo:** AND WAS JUST STANDING THERE??? LOOKING AT US??? 

**Kenma:** I KNOW SHUT UP

**Kenma:** That was literally so embarrassing

**Kenma:** But ANYWAYS he started talking and I PANICKED AND OH GOD I WAS LIKE “i’m sorry but my boyfriend really doesn’t like you talking to me like this. It makes him uncomfortable.” AND TRIED TO MAKE IT SOUND LIKE INTIMIDATING BECAUSE KURO IS HUGE

**Kenma:** AND HE GOES

**Kenma:** OMFG

**Kenma:** HE GOES

**Kenma:** “you’re dating akaashi?”

**Kuroo:** HE’S JOKING PLS

**Akaashi:** AHAHAHAHA

**Kenma:** SO 

**Kenma:** AKAASHI I GUESS WE’RE DATING BECAUSE I GOT SCARED AND SAID YES AND THEN KIND OF RAN AWAY

**Hinata:** Ran away? Like actually ran?

**Kageyama:** That’s what you’re focusing on?

**Hinata:** Yes????

**Kuroo:** I 

**Kuroo:** Cannot believe this

**Kuroo:** Ew I’m so pissed off

**Kuroo:** Kenma I want to yell at him

**Kenma:** Don’t

**Kuroo:** Kenma.

**Kenma:** Tetsurou.

**Kenma:** Hopefully he’ll leave me alone after this

**Kuroo:** If he doesn’t i’M GOING TO YELL AT HIM

**Kenma:** NO DON’T

**Sugawara:** DO IT KUROO DO IT DO IT

**Kenma:** NO NO 

**Daichi:** KOUSHI NO

\--

**Oikawa: 🙃**

**Oikawa:** I’m annoyed

**Iwaizumi:** I know

**Oikawa:** I’m so annoyed

**Kageyama:** Why?

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan and I have a new neighbor

**Oikawa:** And it’s this girl and like

**Oikawa:** Everytime Iwaizumi leaves she comes over to flirt with me

**Oikawa:** And it’s really annoying but like, whatever, I can deal with that I guess

**Oikawa:** But like  **🙃**

**Oikawa:** Everytime I leave, she comes over and starts flirting with Iwa-chan

**Oikawa:** Which is ten times more annoying and I can’t deal with it

**Oikawa:** Because I have a severe jealousy issue apparently 

**Sugawara:** At least you’re honest?

**Oikawa:** It’s hard not to be because my blood boils everytime I see her now  **🙃**

**Iwaizumi:** It’s fine, Tooru, it’s not a big deal

**Oikawa:** Hajime it’s annoying

**Oikawa:** Anyways I don’t know what to do

**Sugawara:** Have really loud sex every night

**Oikawa:** I’m not saying we’ve tried that

**Oikawa:** But she came over after Iwa-chan went to work and asked me if I slept around a lot and made a comment that I ‘must be so good in bed’

**Oikawa:** BITCH WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** Wait you didn’t tell me that

**Oikawa:** Because it’s stupid and pisses me off

**Iwaizumi:** Ew

**Iwaizumi:** I’m pissed off

**Iwaizumi:** I have a severe jealousy issue apparently  **🙃**

**Sugawara:** AHAHA AT LEAST YOU’RE HONEST

\--

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  _ GAME DAY!! ❤️🤍 _

**Oikawa:** OMG GOOD LUCK!!!

**Bokuto:** GOOD LUCK BUT ALSO WE’RE GOING TO BEAT YOU

**Kuroo:** NO NO NO

**Kuroo:** BUT ALSO GOOD LUCK

**Sugawara:** Omg!! Fun!! Good luck!!

**Hinata:** Wtf I want to have a game

**Kageyama:** We’re literally having one soon

**Kuroo:** It’s a practice match

**Kuroo:** BUT I’M STILL EXCITED

**Bokuto:** YESS YESS YESS

**Kageyama:** Good luck you guys!!

**Kuroo:** OMFG ALSO GUYS

**Kuroo:** I FORGOT TO TELL YOU

**Kuroo:** LAST NIGHT

**Bokuto:** OMG OMG OMG 

**Bokuto:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** KENMA AND AKAASHI YOU LOOK SO CUTE

**Hinata:** Omg aw

**Sugawara:** THEY’RE CHEERLEADERS

**Sugawara:** Are those the school’s actual uniforms???

**Akaashi:** Yes!

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI IS ON THE CHEER TEAM

**Sugawara:** HE’S WHAT

**Kageyama:** Omg Akaashi 😍

**Oikawa:** OMGOMG

**Akaashi:** Yeah lol 

**Akaashi:** I don’t talk about it a lot because I get embarrassed 

**Sugawara:** DON’T DON’T DON’T

**Akaashi:** Lol

**Akaashi:** I was able to talk to some of my teammates and their friends on Nekoma’s cheer team and get the outfits

**Akaashi:** _ attached image _

**Akaashi:** Here’s another pic of us!

**Kuroo:** I’M GOING TO DIE OVER THIS ALL OVER AGAIN BYE

**Bokuto:** ME TOO ME TOO ME TOO

**Sugawara:** ME TOO ME TOO

**Atsumu:** Ahhhh femboys

**Atsumu:** So 😍

\--

**Akaashi:** So ??????

**Sugawara:** Yes?

**Akaashi:** I just

**Akaashi:** I just got done talking to Inuoka??

**Bokuto:** What? What did he say?

**Akaashi:** HAHA

**Akaashi:** AHHAHA HE CONFRONTED ME ABOUT MINE AND KENMA’S ‘RELATIONSHIP’

**Akaashi:** AND HE GOES HE GOES 

**Akaashi:** “I’m really happy for you and all, but I want you to know that Kenma doesn’t love you. He’s cheating on you.”

**Asahi:** At least.. He told you?

**Akaashi:** He was weirdly mean about it??

**Akaashi:** Like 

**Akaashi:** Idk how to explain it

**Akaashi:** Like I was not betrayed or heartbroken whatsoever in this situation but I still wanted to cry

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI NO

**Akaashi:** Kenma are you cheating on me in public again? 😢

**Kenma:** IT’S KURO’S FAULT HE’S BEEN SO EMBARRASSING RECENTLY

**Daichi:** KUROO??

**Atsumu:** KUROO WHAT DID YOU DO

**Kuroo:** IT’S NOT MY FAULT

**Kuroo:** WE GOT NEW PRACTICE UNIFORMS AND AHHH

**Kuroo:** KENMA LOOKS SO GOOD IN THEM IT JUST

**Kuroo:** MY BRAIN SHORT CIRCUITS AND I GET SO???

**Nishinoya:** Horny?

**Kenma:** Yes

**Kenma:** Kuro.. doesn’t look bad in the new uniforms either

**Akaashi:** I’m dating a freak heart eyes

**Kenma:** WE NEVER DO ANYTHING WHERE PEOPLE CAN SEE US

**Kuroo:** AND LIKE IT’S NEVER ANYTHING THAT’S REALLY CROSSING A LINE 

**Kuroo:** WE’RE NOT FUCKING

**Kuroo:** I’M NOT SUCKING HIS DICK

**Kuroo:** I’m just givin’ him the ‘ol rusty trombone

**Sugawara:** the fucking what

**Kuroo:** u know i’m just slickin the sea serpent 

**Atsumu:** I-

**Kuroo:** the handy manny, the higgy piggy, the magic touch

**Kuroo:** The handy J

**Kenma:** Why tf are you like this

**Kenma:** ANYWAYS INUOKA DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO MIND HIS BUSINESS

**Kuroo:** You don’t know how to be quiet 🤤

**Kenma** has removed  **Kuroo** from the group

**Akaashi:** KENMA

**Nishinoya:** NICE KENMA

**Kenma:** I STILL STAND BY WHAT I SAID ???? INUOKA DOESN’T HAVE TO INVESTIGATE AND JUST STAND THERE UNTIL WE NOTICE

**Atsumu:** Maybe he likes to watch

**Kenma:** Why the fuck would you say that to me

**Kenma** has removed  **Atsumu** from the chat

**Kenma** has left the chat

**Kenma** has blocked  **Oikawa Tooru, Sawamura Daichi, Azumane Asahi, Nishinoya Yuu, Tanaka Ryu, Shimizu Kiyoko, Miya Atsumu, Miya Osamu, Iwaizumi Hajime, Hinata Shouyou, Kageyama Tobio, Akaashi Keiji, Bokuto Koutarou, Sugawara Koushi, Tsukishima Kei, Yamaguchi Tadashi,** and  **Kuroo Tetsurou**

**Osamu** has added  **Atsumu** to the chat

**Atsumu:** gasp

**Daichi:** HAHA DID KENMA BLOCK US

**Kuroo:** YES

**Kuroo:** He does that so he can’t get added back LMAO

**Sugawara:** ATSUMU AHAHA YOU JUST SAID THAT

**Atsumu:** I really shook that man to his core 😎


	97. We're episode machines and I was tempted to make this scarier than it is oops maybe next episode

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: you should like get mad at me
> 
> Kenma: I wanna feel the rush that Suga feels

_ GAME DAY!! ❤️🤍 _

**Daichi:** So I felt like changing my lock screen and I was going through my folder of Suga pictures

**Daichi:** Suga is so beautiful

**Daichi:** like I couldn’t stop smiling when I was scrolling ahh

**Kuroo:** SHUT UP THATS CUTE

**Kenma:** That’s fine I’ll just PEE ALL OVER THE PLACE

**Kuroo:** where is he anyways?

**Kuroo:** SUGA MY LOVE WHERE ARE YOU

**Daichi:** lol he’s in class

**Kenma:** boo if Kuroo called you “my love” Suga would be upset

**Kenma:** get upset Daichi

**Kenma:** get jealous

**Daichi:** well I know he’s joking lol

**Kenma:** boo 

**Kuroo:** boo

**Kuroo:** Daichi barely gets jealous

**Kuroo:** must be nice to not be ✨insecure✨ 😳😳

**Daichi:** I wouldn’t say that I barely am jealous

**Daichi:** it’s usually just masked with anger

**Daichi:** I have two main emotions

**Daichi:** love and anger 🙂

**Tanaka:** anger is so scary

**Asahi:** it’s so so scary

**Daichi:** then don’t make me angry

**Sugawara:** I like making Daichi angry

**Sugawara:** it’s 😳🤤🥵🥵

**Daichi:** yeah, because you’re a brat on purpose

**Sugawara:** ☺️☺️

**Oikawa:** Koushi is scary

**Sugawara:** daichiii

**Daichi:** yes

**Sugawara:** my favorite man. The person I love the most in the entire world

**Daichi:** lol what

**Sugawara:** do you wanna meet me on campus for coffee? I feel like I’m gonna die and the coffee at my place just doesn’t cut it

**Daichi:** I would’ve said yes no matter what lol I’m on my way

**Sugawara:** see you in a bit💗

**Kuroo:** you guys make me sick

**Kuroo:** no one said you can be the cutest couple

**Kuroo:** disgusting

**Oikawa:** Kuroo, suga basically said angry Daichi makes him horny

**Kuroo:** they have no right being the cutest couple

**Kenma:** stupid lmao

**Kenma:** wait omg

**Kenma:** Kuro have you ever been angry with me?

**Kuroo:** no lol

**Kenma:** you should like get mad at me

**Kenma:** I wanna feel the rush that Suga feels

**Kuroo:** that sounds nearly impossible

**Kuroo:** my Kenma is way too perfect

**Kenma:** interesting

**-**

**Kuroo:** UNACCEPTABLE

**Kageyama:** ??

**Kuroo:** KAGEYAMA LEND ME YOUR EAR

**Kuroo:** or eyes because we’re texting

**Kageyama:** lol okay I’m listening or reading I guess

**Kuroo:** KENMA HAS BEEN AVOIDING ME ALL WEEK

**Kuroo:** HE DOESNT KISS ME BEFORE I LEAVE AND WHEN I GET BACK

**Kuroo:** AND WHEN I LEAN IN HE SIGHS AND KISSES MY CHEEK

**Kuroo:** AND HE DOESNT CUDDLE ME WHEN WE’RE GOING TO SLEEP

**Kuroo:** IDK DID I DO SOMETHING WRONG? WE CUDDLE ALL THE TIME

**Kageyama:** I’m sorry omg uhh

**Kageyama:** idk maybe he’s just not feeling it? Maybe he’s stressed with school?

**Kuroo:** OH NO KENMA MY SMART KENMA NEEDS A BREAK FROM SCHOOL

**Kuroo:** MAYBE THATS IT

**Kuroo:** I NEED TO SEE IF HES OKAY

**Kageyama:** good luck!

**Kuroo:** IF HE DOESNT CUDDLE ME I MIGHT HAVE TO HAVE YOU CUDDLE ME

**Hinata:** NO!! GO CHECK KENMA 😡😡

**Kageyama:** lol

**Asahi:** what is happening in here??

**Tanaka:** honestly idk but I can’t stop laughing

**Tanaka:** Shouyou where did you come from

**Kageyama:** he’s so cute lol

**Kuroo:** KENMA SAID HES FINE AND THEN LEFT WHERE IS HE GOING WHY DOES HE HATE ME WHAT DID I DO

**Kageyama:** just give him some time I guess?

**Kuroo:** mAYBE MAYBE AHH

-

**Kuroo:** UNACCEPTABLE

**Bokuto:** oh?

**Kuroo:** SO ITS DAY 9 OF KENMA HATING MY GUTS

**Bokuto:** okay

**Kuroo:** I JUST CAME HOME FROM WORK

**Kuroo:** AND HE IS LAYING ACROSS LEV AND YAKUS LAP

**Kuroo:** LEV IS PLAYING WIRH HIS HAIR

**Bokuto:** AHH NO

**Kuroo:** WHAT THE FUCK IVE BARELY TOUCHED HIM THESE PAST FEW DAYS AND HES LETTING LEV PLAY WITH HIS HAIR

**Kuroo:** I’LL BE BACK

-

**Kenma:** ☺️

**Kuroo:** Stop

**Nishinoya:** ???

**Kenma:** I made Kuro mad ☺️

**Kenma:** I get it suga

**Kenma:** the rush. It’s unmatched

**Kuroo:** I cant believe you

**Nishinoya:** I don’t understand what’s happening

**Yaku:** Kuroo kicked us out!

**Kenma:** and then we fucked in the shower

**Nishinoya:** !!!!

**Yaku:** why the shower?? What??

**Kenma:** He insisted that I got levs touch off of me so he dragged me to the shower

**Kenma:** And then he fucked me in said shower ☺️☺️

**Hinata:** you’re so happy and it’s scary

**Kenma:** I’m tired. Goodnight everyone☺️

**Sugawara:** lmao goodnight Kenma

**Kenma:** Kuro hurry up and cuddle me

**Kuroo:** I’m coming, I was getting you water

**Kenma:** hurry hurry

**Sugawara:** my influence

**Daichi:** incredible

-

**Atsumu:** I have an announcement to make!

**Atsumu:** I’m going on a date tomorrow

**Oikawa:** I’m sorry for the person you’re going with

**Hinata:** how'd you manage that?

**Kageyama:** woo

**Atsumu:** thank you Tobio! On second thought, I’m cancelling the date and taking you out instead

**Hinata:** NO 

**Hinata:** WOO YAY ATSUMU CONGRATS

**Atsumu:** that’s what I thought

**Atsumu:** and I’m choosing to ignore you Oikawa

**Oikawa: ＼＼\٩(๑`^´๑)۶//／／**

**Kageyama:** tell me how it goes!

**Atsumu:** I will! 

**Oikawa:** GUYS GUYS

**Oikawa:** ( T_T)＼(^-^ )

**Oikawa:** That’s me and Iwa-Chan

**Iwaizumi:** lol

**Atsumu:** wow thanks for changing the subject I guess

**Oikawa:** isn’t it cute! It can even be Shouyou and Tobio. Or even four-eyes and Tadashi!

**Tsukishima:** you wear glasses too

**Oikawa:** four-eyes four-eyes

**Tsukishima:** also why do you call him Tadashi

**Yamaguchi:** lol because we’re friends!

**Tsukishima:** gross

**Oikawa:** WHATS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi, you find weird friends

**Yamaguchi:** we’re actually very similar

**Tsukishima:** yeah you’re both chaotic

**Sugawara:** at least you’re aware lol

**Atsumu:** THANKS FOR ASKING EVERYONE MY DATE IS ACTUALLY WITH SHINSUKE

**Kageyama:** Cute! What are you guys gonna do?

**Atsumu:** Tobio I’ll cancel this date right now, I swear

**Hinata:** AHHH

**Atsumu:** we’re going out for lunch then to watch a movie. I think we’ll take a walk afterward

**Kageyama:** it’ll be fun!

**Oikawa:** sounds boring

**Atsumu:** Oikawa you have beef with my brother, not me

**Oikawa:** well you share a face so…

**Atsumu:** THATS NOT IN MY CONTROL

**Oikawa:** idk what to tell you

**Atsumu:** I don’t think you understand the power that I have Oikawa

**Oikawa:** I guess I don’t

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa stop being annoying. He's excited for his date and you’re ruining it

**Oikawa:** SO WHAT ARE YOU GONNA RUN AWAY WITH HIS BROTHER OR SOMETHING

**Oikawa:** DONT IGNORE ME IWA CHAN PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME


	98. Head empty just episodes I guess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tanaka: alright Kiyoko, we’re waiting
> 
> Sugawara: WE ARE NOT WAITING
> 
> Sugawara: KIYOKO DO NOT SAY ANYTHING PLEASE

**Kageyama** added  **Koganegawa** to the group

**Hinata:** AHH KOGANEGAWA

**Koganegawa:** HINATA

**Tsukishima** left the group

**Kageyama** added  **Tsukishima** to the group

**Koganegawa:** TSUKKI

**Tsukishima:** hi

**Koganegawa:** TSUKKI

**Tsukishima:** Stop

**Koganegawa:** WAIT OMG KUNIMI AND KINDAICHI TOO AW AW

**Kunimi:** no

**Kunimi** left the group

**Kageyama** added  **Kunimi** to the group

**Kenma:** Kuro it’s scary in here

**Kuroo:** Just ignore it kitten

**Hinata:** Okay ew

**Kageyama:** I ran into Koganegawa when i was at the store

**Koganegawa:** YEAH!

**Koganegawa:** Did you notice that I’ve gotten better at filing my nails

**Kageyama:** I didn’t really look

**Koganegawa:** Okay well I’ll show you next time!!!

**Sugawara:** You have such cute energy haha

**Sugawara:** Like Yamaguchi but all caps 💗

**Koganegawa:** THANK YOUU💗💗

**Yamaguchi:** lol he does

**Tsukishima:** Don’t say that

**-**

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  _ Disgusting _

**Kuroo:** Guess who I just saw

**Kuroo:** Here’s a hint: I hate him

**Kenma:** Daisho?

**Kuroo:** YES

**Kuroo:** My blood was boiling 

**Kuroo:** He WAVED at me

**Kuroo:** disgusting

**Kenma:** I used to think he was hot but then I like actually met him

**Kuroo:** WHAT

**Kuroo:** I suddenly hate him more

**Akaashi:** Kenma, what is your taste in men

**Kenma:** idk really

**Sugawara:** Men who look like they’d destroy him

**Kenma:** HAHAHA

**Oikawa:** I was thinking men who look like they love to eat ass

**Kenma:** all of the above

**Oikawa:** HAHAHAH KENMA SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** Kenma where are you

**Kenma:** In the bedroom

**Kuroo:** Good, I’m expecting a kiss right when I open this door

**Kenma:** lol

**Kuroo:** AH KENMA IS SO CUTE

**Kuroo:** He always says the cutest little “welcome home” 

**Kenma:** Don’t embarrass me lol

**Kuroo:** you're so cute you're so cute

-

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Video _

**Sugawara:** After a few days of practice, me and Noya mastered the WAP dance

**Daichi:** I think the practice paid off

**Asahi:** Is that where you’ve been, Noya? Like is that why you haven’t been coming over?

**Nishinoya:** is that all you have to say? after me and Suga put on such a wonderful show

**Nishinoya:** not even a “wow Noya I didn’t know you could do the splits!” Or “amazing!! My boyfriend is so talented and hot”

**Nishinoya:** Daichi complimented me more when he was recording it

**Asahi:** Wow! Noya that was so cool!! My boyfriend is incredible

**Nishinoya:** Asahi 🥺🥺 Wanna come over when you’re off?

**Asahi:** yes!

**Nishinoya:** I missed you so much!! Asahi omg

**Koganegawa:** Me and Futakuchi learned it too omg!! We tried to get Aone to do it but he was embarrassed

**Hinata:** Aw I wanna learn it

**Yamaguchi:** Hinata, let's do it!!

**Sugawara:** the lyrics are begging to be a tag yourself

**Sugawara:** i'm “never lost a fight but I’m looking for a beatin”

**Nishinoya:** “he got a beard, well, I’m tryna wet it”

**Asahi:** noya…

**Yamaguchi: “** I wanna gag, I wanna choke”

**Tsukishima:** let’s not do this

**Hinata: “** gobble me, swallow me, drip down the side of me”

**Tsukishima:** lets definitely not do this

**Kenma: “** if he ate my ass, he’s a bottom feeder”

**Kuroo:** KENMA I LOVE YOU

**Akaashi: “** I want you to park that big Mack truck right in this little garage”

**Oikawa: “** I don’t wanna spit, I wanna gulp”

**Tanaka:** alright Kiyoko, we’re waiting

**Sugawara:** WE ARE NOT WAITING

**Sugawara:** KIYOKO DO NOT SAY ANYTHING PLEASE

**Kiyoko:** Lmaoooo

**Kunimi:** “you can't hurt my feelings, but I like pain”

**Kindaichi:** AKIRA

**Kageyama:** lol

**Hinata:** YAMAGUCHI ARE YOU BUSY CAUSE WE CAN LEARN IT RN

**Yamaguchi:** IM NOT!! COME OVER

-

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa has been singing all morning

**Iwaizumi:** He’s so cute I want to die

**Sugawara:** Aw Aw

**Iwaizumi:** He’s in such a good mood today 

**Oikawa:** it’s because Mattsun and Makki are coming over! I’m finally included

**Iwaizumi:** you’re always included, you just always say no

**Oikawa:** I have no idea what you’re talking about

**Iwaizumi:** omg he’s pouting

**Iwaizumi:** _ Attached image _

**Kenma:** the only way you could get a picture at that angle… is if he’s… sitting on your LAP AHHHH CUTE CUTE YOU GUYS ARE CUTE AS FUCK

**Akaashi:** Oikawa is so cute when he pouts omg

**Iwaizumi:** That's part of the reason why I tease him so much

**Sugawara:** DONT YOU DARE SAY ANOTHER CUTE THING IWAIZUMI IM WARNINGN YOU

**Iwaizumi:** I kissed his cheek and now he’s blushing

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN STOP 

**Sugawara:** THAT IS IT IVE HAD ENOUGH THIS IS SO CUTE 

**Sugawara:** OKAY FINE OKAY FINE I’LL JUST DIE HERE IT’S FINE

**Daichi:** Suga lmao calm down

**Sugawara:** Daichi please come hug me 

**Daichi:** coming

**Oikawa:** iwa-Chan is having an affectionate day💓💓💓

**Iwaizumi:** I guess I am

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t want to let go of you lol

**Kenma:** AHHH IWAIZUMI IS SO CUTE 

**Akaashi:** THATS SO SWEET OMG

**Sugawara:** if I don’t reply it’s because I’m DEAD SO DEAD

**Oikawa:** and you guys keep making him laugh. Like he keeps letting out these soft little laughs and he’s got the cutest smile on his face 

**Akaashi:** we live in a time where we can just experience Oikawa and Iwaizumi being in love

**Akaashi:** incredible. I wouldn’t trade it for anything 

-

**Akaashi:** I am shaking

**Bokuto:** NO ITS OKAY YOURE ALRIGHT NOW

**Kenma:** what happened??

**Akaashi:** I’m in the car with Bokuto and there was a spider on me

**Bokuto:** I pulled over so I could dust everything out a bit

**Bokuto:** the spider was removed from the car though

**Akaashi:** we’re just waiting a little longer before we go because I’m so scared 

**Kenma:** was it big?

**Bokuto:** not really

**Akaashi:** It was huge

**Bokuto:** I MEAN IT WAS GIANT

**Hinata:** was it big or not?

**Bokuto:** definitely really big!!

**Akaashi:** god that was so scary Bokuto literally never let that happen to me again

**Bokuto:** IT WONT EVER HAPPEN AGAIN AKAASHI I PROMISE

**Bokuto:** I don’t even know where he came from

**Akaashi:** hell

**Kenma:** lmaooooo

**Kenma:** Where are you guys going anyways? It’s pretty late

**Bokuto:** to visit my parents! They rented a cool place for the weekend

**Kageyama:** Aw have fun!

**Bokuto:** WE WILL THANK YOU KAGEYAMA

**Kageyama:** :-))) drive safe

**Daichi:** so cute lol

**Kenma:** Kageyama, is Hinata with you?

**Kageyama:** he is

**Kenma:** I sent him something important on twitter

**Kageyama:** oh his phone is charging. And he’s sleeping right now

**Tanaka:** sounds a little 😳🥴🥴 to me

**Kageyama:** _ Attached image _

**Kageyama:** just sleeping this time

**Oikawa:** this time

**Oikawa:** THIS TIME 

**Kenma:** THIS TIME

**Nishinoya:** THIS TIME

**Kageyama:** he looks so cute when he sleeps

**Kageyama:** I just wanna keep kissing him but I don’t want to wake him up

**Kenma:** it’s fine just do it

**Sugawara:** actually Kageyama, it’s pretty late and we have morning training. Don’t you want to sleep

**Daichi:** well the training is optional

**Sugawara:** we all know he’s going to show up no matter how tired he is

**Daichi:** he’s right. Go to bed Kageyama

**Kageyama:** :-( but Hinata looks so cute

**Daichi:** I know but, you can look at him tomorrow. Goodnight

**Kageyama:** fine. Goodnight everyone

**Sugawara:** goodnight💖💖

**Akaashi:** goodnight from me and Bokuto

**Oikawa:** go to sleep loser

**Iwaizumi:** you too, idiot

**Kageyama:** 🧡🧡

**-**

**Hinata:** KENMA IN WHAT WORLD IS A PICTURE OF YOU SHOWING THE MIDDLE FINGER IMPORTANT

**Oikawa:** HAHAH WHY DID YOU SEND IT ON TWITTER

**Kenma:** to surprise him


	99. We have so many episodes lmao

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Atsumu: FIND AN UGLY BOYFRIEND THEN
> 
> Hinata: HEY ATSUMU WANNA BE MY BOYFRIEND
> 
> Atsumu: That’s just rude

**Sugawara** changed the group name to 💗💗

**Sugawara:** Okay everyone

**Sugawara:** I talked to Yui

**Sugawara:** We are working towards friends

**Sugawara:** She was telling me about this guy from one of her classes that asked her out and that she’s gonna go

**Sugawara:** and she’s so cute like

**Sugawara:** The way she was talking about this guy, you could tell that she has a crush on him idk

**Sugawara:** Like the way she’d talk about Daichi but shyer

**Sugawara:** Also she wouldn’t stop apologizing to me and I felt so bad

**Sugawara:** Anyways, it was cute and I’m no longer upset whenever I think of her

**Oikawa:** When did you even talk to her lol like what

**Sugawara:** We were getting coffee at the same time so we sat together

**Sugawara:** She also told me the picture that daichi posted on instagram was cute and I didn’t see it because SOMEONE NEVER TAGS ME IN POSTS WITH ME IN THEM

**Daichi:** I forget!! I get so excited to post the picture lmao

**Kenma:** Good boyfriends have their notifs on

**Kuroo:** Periodt

**Sugawara:** Some people ignore instagram notifs anyways

**Daichi:** periodt

**Oikawa:** Omg wait that post was cute

**Oikawa:** Suga on the beach just smiling and looking so in love

**Oikawa:** it literally looked like a dream

**Daichi:** That’s what i thought too!!

**Daichi:** I want to just look at it forever

**Oikawa:** And all the selfies after shut up

**Bokuto:** SO CUTE IT WAS SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** Thanks guys 💘

**Daichi:** But Suga, I’m glad you guys are kinda friends! Like idk I’m just glad you feel better about everything

**Sugawara:** Anything for my idiot boyfriend! 😘

**Sugawara:** No but actually Daichi. She’s important to you and you’re important to me. It’d be unfair if I didn’t try

**Sugawara:** And I never hated her really, I was just bitter and jealous and ugly about it

**Sugawara:** and dramatic but shut up

**Daichi:** lol thank you suga

**Sugawara:** 😚

**Daichi:** 😚

**Oikawa:** How cute. Makes me want to commit arson four times

**Kageyama:** Oikawa what

**Oikawa:** Don’t talk to me Tobio

**Oikawa:** Actually do talk to me

**Oikawa:** How are you? 

**Kageyama:** I’m good?? How are you?

**Oikawa:** I’m good

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Oikawa:** ew

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t talk to him if you’re just going to be rude

**Oikawa:** Tobio knows I love him

**Iwaizumi:** That doesn’t mean you can be mean to him

**Oikawa:** You’re awfully protective of Tobio

**Iwaizumi:** Everyone is

**Sugawara:** !!! because he’s so cute

**Hinata:** !!!!

**Kageyama:** I’m so embarrassed, let’s talk about something else

**Akaashi:** Let's talk about how cute you are

**Kageyama:** no please

**Tsukishima:** _ attached image _

**Tsukishima:** Let's talk about this picture

**Bokuto:** AHH YAMAGUCHI AND KAGEYAMA AND HINATA CUDDLING THEY JUST CUDDLE OMG

**Sugawara:** I WANT TO TATTOO THAT INSIDE MY EYELIDS SO THAT I CAN SEE IT WHEN I BLINK

**Kageyama:** No, let's not talk about that

**Kuroo:** _ Attached Image _

**Kuroo:** How about this picture?

**Sugawara:** STOP STOP IM SAVING THAT OMG LITERALLY REPLACE EVERY SINGLE VISIBLE THING ON EARTH WITH THAT IMAGE BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO LOOK AWAY

**Akaashi:** Ah, Kageyama with a puppy. He looks so cute

**Kageyama:** NO NO HOW DO YOU HAVE THAT PICTURE

**Kuroo:** Kenma sent it to me

**Kageyama:** KENMA

**Kenma:** Shouyou sent it to me

**Kageyama:** SHOUYOU

**Hinata:** Let's talk about how cute you’re acting right now because you’re embarrassed 

**Kageyama:** STOP STOP PLEASE

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Iwaizumi:** _ Attached Image _

**Iwaizumi:** _ Attached Image _

**Kiyoko:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** _ Attached Image  _

**Kenma:** Attached Image

**Kageyama:** WHY DOES EVERYONE HAVE SO MANY PICTURES OF ME

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Akaashi:** _ Attached Image _

**Kenma:** _ Attached Image _

**Kageyama:** ????

**Asahi:** _ Attached Image _

**Kageyama** left the group

**Nishinoya:** If you see my camera roll filled with these pics

**Nishinoya:** No you didn’t

**Hinata** added  **Kageyama** to the group

**Hinata:** stay here

**Hinata:** You’re so cute

**Kageyama** left the group

**Hinata:** He’s blushing so much right now omgomg

**Bokuto:** AHHHHH

**Oikawa** added  **Kageyama** to the group

-

**Yamaguchi:** I think it’s unfair that Tsukki hasn’t sent an accidental picture to the group chat yet

**Tsukishima:** I think you embarrassed us both with yours so it should count

**Yamaguchi:** I think you’re just too afraid of what others think

**Tsukishima:** I’m just not an idiot

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki :-(

**Tsukishima:** I didn’t mean you’re an idiot I meant I just pay attention to who I’m sending things to

**Tsukishima:** Sorry

**Yamaguchi:** You know what would make me feel better? 🥺

**Tsukishima:** What

**Yamaguchi:** You sending something to the group chat on accident

**Tsukishima:** Omg

**Nishinoya:** Yamaguchi goes “send nudes to the group on accident but on purpose”

**Tsukishima:** If it happens it happens

**Yamaguchi:** You really don’t love me?

**Tsukishima:** That usually works but not this time

**Sugawara:** I can send nudes if that makes you feel better

**Yamaguchi:** It might

**Tsukishima:** No what the hell

**Sugawara:** Lol I was joking

**Sugawara:** It’s fine Yamaguchi, maybe you jinxed him and it’ll happen now.

-

**Atsumu:** _ Attached Image _

**Oikawa:** WHAT IS THAT???THIS IS WHY I HATE YOU AND YOUR BROTHER

**Hinata:** WHY DID YOU SEND THAT WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT

**Atsumu:** Cause Tobio looks so cute in it

**Kuroo:** I’m inspired

**Kuroo:** Kenma, I’m buying you thigh highs

**Kenma:** 🥰

**Hinata:** OKAY BUT WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM WHY WOULD YOU SEND THAT

**Atsumu:** I’m saying goodbye to my favorite Tobio pics

**Hinata:** WHY IS HE WEARING YOUR JACKET TOO WHAT

**Atsumu:** Because he liked wearing it?

**Hinata:** AHHH

**Kageyama:** Why are you like this

**Atsumu:** omg I just explained it

**Atsumu:** I’m saying goodbye to my favorite pics of you

**Atsumu:** I have a boyfriend now so I don’t need this anymore

**Atsumu:** I thought everyone here would appreciate it

**Hinata:** WHY DO YOU HAVE PICTURES OF MY BOYFRIEND LIKE THAT

**Atsumu:** HE WAS MY BOYFRIEND AT ONE POINT 

**Hinata:** BUT HE’S MY BOYFRIEND NOW

**Sugawara:** Aw Kageyama you do look really cute

**Nishinoya:** Kageyama used to BOTTOM OMG

**Kageyama:** There’s no use trying to leave because I’ll just be added by someone

**Atsumu:** OKAY FAIR POINT BUT JUST BECAUSE HE’S YOUR BOYFRIEND DOESN’T MEAN I DONT THINK HES HOT STILL

**Hinata:** WELL YOU SHOULDN’T

**Atsumu:** FIND AN UGLY BOYFRIEND THEN

**Hinata:** HEY ATSUMU WANNA BE MY BOYFRIEND

**Atsumu:** That’s just rude

**Hinata:** GOOD

**Kenma:** lmaooo

**Atsumu:** You’re just jealous that me and Tobio dated longer and did more things

**Hinata:** IM NOT JEALOUS BECAUSE KAGEYAMA ACTUALLY LOVES ME 

**Atsumu:** low blow

**Atsumu:** but he never bottomed for you

**Hinata:** WHY WOULD HE

**Hinata:** HE LIKES BEING SUPER DOMINANT

**Atsumu:** Not when he was with me

**Hinata:** WELL HAS HE EVER ATE YOUR ASS

**Kuroo:** Nice Kageyama!

**Atsumu:** NO BUT I ATE HIS

**Oikawa:** Wow Kenma, is Atsumu your type?

**Kenma:** Nah, our hair is too similar

**Hinata:** WELL I BET HE’S NEVER BLINDFOLDED YOU

**Atsumu:** WELL I BET YOU’VE NEVER FUCKED IN A CAR

**Hinata:** DID YOU KNOW HES GOOD AT DIRTY TALK

**Atsumu:** TRUST ME, I KNOW

**Hinata:** STOP THAT

**Atsumu:** NAME ANYTHING SHOUYOU I BET WE’VE DONE IT

**Hinata:** HE’S INTO SPANKING

**Atsumu:** yup

**Hinata:** HE LOVES HAIR PULLING

**Atsumu:** I know that one too

**Hinata:** HE LIKES TO LEAVE A BUNCH OF MARKS LIKE BRUISES AND LITTLE BITES

**Atsumu:** That one is kinda inconvenient but it’s cute

**Hinata:** HE LIKES TO FUCK MY THIGHS AND CUM ON MY FACE

**Atsumu:** It was usually the other way around so...

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA LIKES THE WAY I SMELL SO MUCH THAT WHEN HE CUMS HE BURIES HIS FACE IN MY HAIR 

**Atsumu:** … 

**Hinata:** HA BET YOU DIDN’T KNOW THAT

**Atsumu:** I didn’t

**Kageyama:** Shouyou what was the point of that

**Atsumu:** Wow Tobio, did I smell like shit or something?

**Kageyama:** Shut up

**Oikawa:** There are so many things I didn’t need to know about Tobio

**Akaashi:** idk what you mean, I’m learning so much here

**Kenma:** I’m embarrassed to say the least 

**Nishinoya:** That argument was so short yet so long

**Atsumu:** well

**Atsumu:** anyways

**Atsumu:** I was just gonna tell everyone that me and Kita made it official so um

**Atsumu:** yeah

**Hinata:** AH KAGEYAMA IM SO SORRY

**Hinata:** I JUST COULDNT STOP IM SORRY

**Kageyama:** it’s fine

**Hinata:** You’re NOT ANGRY??

**Kageyama:** no

**Kageyama:** IM EMBARRASSED STUPID WHY WOULD YOU SAY ALL THAT

**Hinata:** IDK I WAS ANGRY

**Atsumu:** HAHAHA

**Kenma:** it’s that strawberry scent man

**Kenma:** it’ll get ya

**Kageyama:** it’s not just the strawberries it’s Shouyou too

**Kageyama:** whatever

**Kageyama:** I don’t need to explain this

**Kageyama:** IM SO EMBARRASSED 

**Hinata:** IM SORRY PLEASE DONT HATE ME

**Kageyama:** I DONT HATE YOU SO SHUT UP

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki don’t make me be like Shouyou and expose you so you don’t have to do it yourself

**Tsukishima** removed  **Kageyama** from the group

**Tsukishima** left the group

  
  



	100. i am so so tired and my head is so empty so i'm just going to sit here and think about eiji's oufits in bf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi: Wow! Tsukki! I wasn’t expecting this!
> 
> Yamaguchi: I thought you went out with Kageyama!

💗💗

**Oikawa:** OKAY OH MY GOD

**Oikawa:** I’LL JUST ADMIT IT OH MY GOD

**Kenma:** Admit what?

**Daichi:** ?

**Hinata:** ???

**Oikawa:** OMG OKAY GOSH

**Oikawa:** I HAVE A SUPERIORITY COMPLEX

**Oikawa:** IT’S NOT MY FAULT MY MUSIC TASTES AND INTERESTS ARE BETTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE’S 

**Oikawa:** AND MY OPINIONS

**Iwaizumi:** Omg idiot, I was worried something was going on

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan!! You’re at work! Don’t text

**Iwaizumi:** I saw a lot of texts from you and wanted to make sure you were alright

**Iwaizumi:** I’m sorry, baby, I was worried.

**Oikawa:** (●´艸｀)ヾ

**Oikawa:** I’m okay! I’m just correct about literally everything

**Iwaizumi:** I already knew that lol

**Iwaizumi:** Have you eaten, beautiful?

**Oikawa:** Yes!! I just had lunch! I hope you did too

**Iwaizumi:** I did! I wish I could have spent it with you ❤️

**Oikawa:** (๑♡3♡๑)

**Oikawa:** Get back to work, handsome!! (´,,•ω•,,)♡

**Iwaizumi:** Okay. I love you. I’m bringing home dinner tonight.  σ(≧ε≦σ) ♡

**Oikawa:** I can’t wait!! I love you too!

**Sugawara:** That was so cute

**Sugawara:** Iwaizumi is so cute

**Sugawara:** Omg

**Sugawara:** HAVE YOU EATEN BEAUTIFUL OMG OMG 

**Sugawara:** OMG OMG 

**Sugawara:** Oikawa I’m obsessed with ur boyfriend

**Oikawa:** Me too

**Oikawa:** My Superior Opinion says that Iwaizumi Hajime is the best man alive

**Sugawara:** I agree

**Kenma:** I agree

**Kuroo:** I agree

**Kageyama:** I agree

**Kunimi:** I agree

**Oikawa:** No

**Oikawa:** Kunimi, you have to sit this one out.

**Kunimi:** I have a boyfriend

-

**Iwaizumi:** So I didn’t realize I was in the groupchat for some reason

**Iwaizumi:** Sorry that you guys had to see my sappy texts to Tooru

**Oikawa:** Don’t apologize Iwa-chan!!!

**Sugawara:** Yeah wtf don’t apologize 

**Kuroo:** NO IWAIZUMI YOU’RE SO SEXY WHEN YOU CARE ABOUT HIM

**Kuroo:** DON’T APOLOGIZE 

**Sugawara:** I AGREE

**Kageyama:** I AGREE

**Kenma:** I AGREE

**Kunimi:** I agree

**Oikawa:** KUNIMI WTF

**Oikawa:** GUYS STOP TRYING TO STEAL IWA-CHAN???

**Kuroo:** I have a boyfriend

**Sugawara:** I have a boyfriend

**Kageyama:** I have a boyfriend

**Kenma:** I have a boyfriend

**Kunimi:** I have a boyfriend

-

**Tsukishima:** Hwy

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi

**Tsukishima:** You shoudlj come over

**Tsukishima:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** UM TSUKISHIMA???????

**Sugawara:** I THINK...

**Sugawara:** I’M SCARED...

**Daichi:** LMAO SUGA WHAT

**Sugawara:** IDK 

**Kenma:** Tsukishima omg

**Kuroo:** Tsukki it’s huge 😳

**Nishinoya:** WOAH TSUKKI FUCKS???

**Yamaguchi:** OMFG

**Yamaguchi:** I’m about t die right now ahaha

**Yamaguchi:** Wow! Tsukki! I wasn’t expecting this!

**Yamaguchi:** I thought you went out with Kageyama!

**Tsukishima:** ahaha oops

**Tsukishima:** I’m stil wieth him that pic is old

**Yamaguchi:** I know babe, I’ve seen it lolol

**Yamaguchi:** Kageyama! How much did you two drink tonight?

**Kageyama:** A lot idk

**Yamaguchi:** AND YOU DIDN’T TAKE TSUKKI’S PHONE AWAY??

**Kageyama:** No? Was I supposed to?

**Sugawara:** KAGEYAMA OMFG YES

**Oikawa:** Omg is he embarrassing when he’s drunk?

**Yamaguchi:** Idk Oikawa, scroll up and tell me

**Oikawa:** Wow 😳 ok, give me an attitude 

**Kenma:** I wish Kuroo was flirty and exciting when he drinks

**Kenma:** Instead he’s just loud and annoying

**Kuroo:** I wish Kenma was flirty and exciting when he drinks

**Kuroo:** Instead he’s just clingy and sad and cries a lot

**Kenma:** Um, wow, okay

**Kuroo:** I love you so much

**Kenma:** Shut up omfg

**Tsukishima:** Tadasshsiiiii

**Yamaguchi:** KAGEYAMA TAKE HIS PHONE OMG

**Kageyama:** Fine

**Nishinoya:** NO NO KAGEYAMA GIVE IT BACK

**Oikawa:** TOBIO DON’T

**Hinata:** TOBIO DON’T

**Atsumu:** Tobio do 🤤

-

**Tsukishima:** So I just woke up

**Tsukishima:** And oh my god

**Tsukishima:** I’m so sorry

**Tsukishima:** I’m so embarrassed

**Tsukishima:** Tobio you’re a fucking idiot why did you let me drink with you?

**Kageyama:** YOU’RE THE ONE WHO INVITED ME OUT??

**Yamaguchi:** YOU’RE BOTH IDIOTS WTF

**Sugawara:** It’s okay Tsukishima! It was only a little scary!

**Tsukishima:** Coming from you??

**Sugawara:** I think it was just unexpected haha

**Sugawara:** It threw me off so much

**Sugawara:** I don’t think I’ll ever be the same again

**Tsukishima:** STOP???

**Yamaguchi:** omg he’s so embarrassed. His face is so red. Stop picking on him

**Daichi:** Are you with him right now?

**Yamaguchi:** Yes, me and Hinata went and picked them up

**Oikawa:** Awww

**Sugawara:** Yamaguchi omg you’re being so cute

**Yamaguchi:** I know he’s embarrassed over it

**Yamaguchi:** And I don’t want him feeling bad 🥺

**Tsukishima:** I love you

**Yamaguchi:** I love you more

**Tsukishima:** Can you bring me water?

**Yamaguchi:** Of course. Do you need anything else?

**Tsukishima:** Just you

**Sugawara:** THERE ARE TEARS IN MY EYES

**Daichi:** Omg

**Daichi:** Is he hungover?

**Yamaguchi:** Very lol

**Daichi:** I hope you feel better soon Tsukishima!

**Sugawara:** ^^!!!!<3

\--

**Kuroo:** So

**Kenma:** We don’t need to talk about it

**Bokuto:** Yes we do?

**Akaashi:** We don’t

**Oikawa:** What?

**Sugawara:** What??

**Sugawara:** What’s going on?

**Kuroo:** Kenma and Akaashi have started doing this thing where they send each other really scary text messages???

**Daichi:** ...scary how?

**Kuroo:** Like

**Kuroo:** Kenma send one

**Kenma:** ‘I want to make out with you’

**Akaashi:** Oh please that’s so mild

**Akaashi:** ‘I want to choke you until you cum five times’

**Oikawa:** OH WOW AHAHAH

**Tanaka:** Why.. Are you two like that?

**Kenma:** IT’S FUNNY

**Tanaka:** IS IT??

**Kenma:** YES HAHA TRY IT WITH NISHINOYA OR SOMETHING

**Nishinoya:** HAHA OKAY

**Tanaka:** OKAY

**Kuroo:** The messages are usually followed with a million emojis

**Kenma:** IT’S FUNNY

**Akaashi:** IT’S HILARIOUS

**Kuroo:** It’s kind of funny but like?? WHY DID YOU GUYS START DOING THAT

**Kenma:** Idk maybe we’re bored

**Kenma:** I’m sure it’ll pass

**Akaashi:** Actually, it’ll never pass because you’re the love of my life

**Kenma:** You’re right baby, what am I even saying?

**Akaashi:** Exactly

**Kenma:** I wish I could shove my tongue in your mouth rn

**Akaashi:** I wish I had my hands around your neck

**Kenma:** I wish I was pulling your hair right now

**Akaashi:** I wish I was fucking your face right now

**Sugawara:** OMFG??? STOP AHAHA??

**Kuroo:** IT’S ALWAYS LIKE THIS

**Kuroo:** Kenma if you wanted all that done to you, you could’ve just let me know

**Kenma:** Umm wow. Terrifying. 

**Kuroo:** WTF???

\--

**Kenma:** Um?

**Kenma:** I’m so embarrassed 

**Kenma:** OMG

**Kenma:** SO WE JUST WON OUR PRACTICE MATCH

**Sugawara:** Wooo!!

**Hinata:** YESS!! I TOLD YOU THAT YOU WOULD!!

**Kenma:** YEAH IK BUT LIKE

**Kenma:** WE WON AND KURO FUCKING 

**Kenma:** KISSED ME IN FRONT OF EVERYONE????

**Kenma:** I WAS SO EMBARRASSED 

**Sugawara:** YES KUROO!!!!

**Daichi:** Omfg

**Oikawa:** OMG

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan that could be us….

**Iwaizumi:** No.

**Oikawa:** (╯︵╰,)

**Hinata:** Kuroo why did you just kiss him omg

**Kuroo:** Too many guys on the team have been calling Kenma cute recently and I needed to give them a reality check.

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHAHA

**Akaashi:** LMAO

**Daichi:** Why are you like that?

**Kuroo:** It’s making me mad

**Daichi:** Why?

**Kuroo:** They keep complimenting him and I CAN TELL HE LIKES THE ATTENTION

**Kenma:** They give me more attention than you do sometimes

**Kuroo:** I CAN’T PAY ATTENTION TO YOU AT ALL TIMES IF WE’RE AT PRACTICE???

**Kenma:** Yeah, but Yaku, Lev, and Shibayama can

**Kuroo:** Stop

**Kenma:** They tell me I’m pretty

**Kuroo:** Stop

**Kenma:** Lev told me i have beautiful eyes yesterday

**Kuroo:** Stop

**Kenma:** Yaku played with my hair when I was waiting for you to go home

**Kuroo:** Omfg

**Kuroo:** Stop

**Kenma:** Shibayama blushes whenever I talk to him

**Kuroo:** STOP?

**Kenma:** No

**Kuroo:** We’re skipping dinner with the team and going home

**Kenma:** Whatever

**Kuroo:** WHATEVER?

**Sugawara:** I think 

**Sugawara:** I think me telling Kenma it’s fun to make your boyfriend mad was a mistake

**Oikawa:** I’m gonna have to agree with you on that

**Kenma:** Suga shut UP

**Kenma:** Kuro’s so mad lol

**Kenma:** He’s driving me home rn 🥰

**Kenma:** LOL HE’S GRUMBLING

**Kenma:** Wowwww I’m in for it when we get back 🥰🤤

**Oikawa:** Kenma

**Oikawa:** Kenma you used to be so sweet and cute and innocent

**Oikawa:** What happened

**Kenma:** Sugawara gave me a life tip is what happened

**Kenma:** so I’ve been calling him Tetsurou when we fuck recently

**Hinata:** Um??? Tmi??

**Yamaguchi:** In the groupchat?? Yeah right Hinata

**Kenma:** Whatever Shou

**Kenma:** Anyways I’ve been calling him that recently

**Kenma:** I think I’m gonna switch it up and call him Kuro just to make him mad

**Sugawara:** HAHA KENMA STOP

**Kenma:** No

**Kenma:** Brb we’re home 😘

**Nishinoya:** KEEP US UPDATED

**Oikawa:** Or don’t

**Nishinoya:** KUROO FUCKS KUROO FUCKS

**Oikawa:** It’s a nightmare in this chat

  
  



	101. this episode is weirdly sad and vulnerable idk so i guess that probably gives you a good idea on how i'm doing recently

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: KUNIMI??
> 
> Kunimi: I have a boyfriend

💗💗

**Kiyoko:** _ attached image  _

**Kiyoko:** Ryuu and I are at my sister’s wedding right now!!

**Kiyoko:** You can’t really see it in the picture, but his bowtie matches my dress. 

**Tanaka:** You look so beautiful!! 

**Kiyoko:** And you’re so handsome!!

**Nishinoya:** YOUR OUTFITS!!!!!!

**Nishinoya:** YOU TWO ARE SO CUTE!!!

**Kageyama:** You guys look so good!!

**Sugawara:** Awww!! Kiyoko you’re so gorgeous!

**Kiyoko:** Thank you!

**Tanaka:** What about me?

**Sugawara:** You too I guess. 

**Tanaka** changed the group name to  _ I’m underappreciated and Suga hates me _

**Kiyoko** changed the group name to  _ You’re being dramatic _

**Tanaka** changed the group name to  _ I’m underappreciated  _

**Kiyoko** changed the group name to  _ You aren’t, everyone loves you _

**Tanaka:** Awww babe

**Kiyoko:** Loll

**Sugawara:** Omg I am levitating right now

**Kiyoko:** Omg Sugawara

**Kiyoko:** When did you get so weird?

**Sugawara:** I’VE ALWAYS BEEN THIS WEIRD KIYOKO

**Kiyoko:** Lol

**Kiyoko:** Sure

**Kenma:** Kiyoko and Tanaka I just want you guys to know that you’re the only straight couple I care about

**Kuroo:** But what about Yui and Daichi?🥺💘

**Sugawara:** SHUT UP AHAHAHA

**Tanaka:** YUI LOL

**Daichi:** Kuroo

**Daichi:** Stop that

**Kiyoko:** How is Yui doing?

**Daichi:** She’s good! Suga and I went to lunch with her and her new boyfriend the other day.

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** It was actually a lot of fun!

**Kiyoko:** Awww! I’m glad to hear that!

**Kiyoko:** Oh, I have to go!

**Kiyoko:** Ryuu is drinking

**Nishinoya:** YAY!! DRUNK RYUU

**Kiyoko:** No.

**Kiyoko:** He’s going to embarrass me and my family.

**Asahi:** Don’t you just do that yourself though?

**Sugawara:** ASAHI

**Daichi:** ASAHI

**Kiyoko:** Ahahahaha

**Kiyoko:** Next time I see you I’m going to kick your ass

**Asahi:** Sounds scary. I can’t wait

**Nishinoya:** I want to see that!! 

**Asahi:** Wow. My own boyfriend 

**Kiyoko:** Lol

**Kiyoko:** OK I REALLY HAVE TO GO NOW

**Sugawara:** Good luck trying to wrangle him 

**Daichi:** I believe in you Kiyoko!!

\--

**Asahi** changed the group name to  _ Help Why Am I Like This _

**Sugawara:** ??

**Nishinoya:** Like what??

**Asahi:** I’m feeling weirdly emotional?

**Daichi:** Aren't you always?

**Asahi:** No, like, extra

**Asahi:** I can't stop thinking of Yuu

**Asahi:** Because like 

**Asahi:** I don’t know. He just made my life so much better

**Asahi:** Like, before we were even dating too. Just knowing him made everything so much better. 

**Asahi:** I would wake up in the morning and kind of just dread the day because everything was repetitive and boring and I hated it, and then I met him and we became friends and I felt like I had so much to look forward to

**Asahi:** Like he taught me how to see my life so much differently and I appreciate everything so much more and honestly it’s all thanks to him

**Asahi:** He just means the world to me 

**Asahi:** I love him so much

**Nishinoya:** Asahi 🥺🥺🥺

**Asahi:** Yuu 🥺🥺🥺

**Daichi:** Omfg 

**Daichi:** Asahi

**Daichi:** That’s so cute

**Daichi:** Omg

**Sugawara:** I’M GOING TO DIE OMG

**Asahi:** Stop stop stop

**Asahi:** I’m embarrassed

**Nishinoya:** Don’t be!! You’re so cute!!

**Asahi:** You’re cuter!

**Nishinoya:** Asahi!!! Come over!!!! I want to see you!!!

**Asahi:** You saw me a few hours ago though

**Nishinoya:** It doesn’t matter!! It’s been too long and I miss you!!

**Asahi:** Give me five minutes and I’ll be there

**Nishinoya:** ❤️

**Asahi:** ❤️

**Sugawara:** I’m going to die, I love it when you guys are cute

**Daichi:** ME TOO ME TOO

\--

  
  


**Kunimi:** _ attached image _

**Kunimi:** Guess who I ran into at the store todayyy

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN???

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN NO

**Oikawa:** YOU CAN’T TALK TO KUNIMI

**Kunimi:** I have a boyfriend

**Iwaizumi:** Why would I not talk to him? He’s fun

**Oikawa:** don’t say that

**Oikawa:** DON’T SAY THAT

**Iwaizumi:** You’re dramatic. I’m in love with you, not Kunimi

**Kunimi:** Noooo. Be in love with me instead

**Oikawa:** KUNIMI??

**Kunimi:** I have a boyfriend

**Kindaichi:** Kunimi “I have a boyfriend” Akira 

**Kunimi:** Yeah 

**Kunimi:** A stupid boyfriend

**Kindaichi:** That’s kind of crazy impossible because I have a really stupid boyfriend too

**Kunimi:** That’s a little rude, coming from an idiot like you

**Kindaichi:** I’ve never been stupid a day in my life

**Kunimi:** You’re stupid everyday, but sure

**Oikawa:** YOU TWO ARE SO CUTE

**Kunimi:** Ew

**Kunimi:** Us and cute shouldn’t exist in the same sentence

**Oikawa:** KUNIMI IT’S TRUE

**Kunimi:** No it isn’t

**Kunimi:** We can’t be cute because I’m part of this relationship 

**Kindaichi:** Don’t say that

**Kunimi:** I’ll say it until I die

**Kindaichi:** No

**Kindaichi:** I love you. You’re stupid. 

**Kunimi:** I love you too. You’re more stupid. I hate you more than anything

**Kindaichi:** Stupid

**Kunimi:** Ugly

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN I’M LIVING I’M LIVING

**Iwaizumi:** ME TOO

**Iwaizumi:** Also, Kindaichi was at the store too

**Iwaizumi:** Kunimi just wanted to mess with you a bit

**Iwaizumi:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** AWWW!! MY FAVORITE BOYS!!!

**Kunimi:** EW SHUT UP

**Oikawa:** LET ME LOVE YOU KUNIMI

**Kunimi:** NO

\--

**Kunimi:** _ attached image _

**Kunimi:** Guess who scored the winning point for our practice match!!!

**Kunimi:** GUESS WHO’S BOYFRIEND SCORED THE WINNING POINT FOR OUR PRACTICE MATCH!!!

**Oikawa:** YESS KINDAICHI KINDAICHI KINDAICHI

**Iwaizumi:** YOU WERE SO AWESOME TODAY

**Kindaichi:** GUYS!! OMG!! STOP!!

**Kunimi:** HE’S BLUSHING HE’S BLUSHING

**Kunimi:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** Wtf where are you guys right now?

**Hinata:** Why is it so dark?

**Kunimi:** We’re sitting in the backseat of his car

**Hinata:** ...Why?

**Kindaichi:** Idk it’s a weird tradition we have if we win games

**Kindaichi:** I drive us to get ice cream and then we sit in my backseat and just hang out

**Oikawa:** AWWW OMFG

**Kindaichi:** It’s my favorite

**Kindaichi:** _ attached image _

**Kindaichi:** HE HAS ICE CREAM ON HIS LIPS HAHA IDIOT

**Kunimi:** idk why you’re being rude to me

**Kunimi:** Take it as a gift or something

**Kenma:** A GIFT HAHA

**Hinata:** How is that a gift?

**Kunimi:** If he kisses me right now, which would be just totally 🤢, like I would never want that to happen because that would be so gross, like ew why would I even WANT HIM TO KISS ME RIGHT NOW, I would taste so sweet 

**Kunimi:** He could just lick it off my lips which would be so ugly 

**Kunimi:** So disgusting

**Kunimi:** I don’t want that to happen or anything

**Oikawa:** Wow, are you jealous, Hajime? That could be you

**Iwaizumi:** Shut the fuck up

**Oikawa:** I want ice cream now

**Oikawa:** Thanks a lot, Kunimi

**Kunimi:** Always a pleasure to serve 

**Oikawa:** Serve what? Inconvenience?

**Kunimi: 😡**

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll buy you ice cream

**Oikawa:** As long as we don’t go to the same ice cream shop Kunimi and Kindaichi

**Kunimi:** Good because we don’t want you here

**Kunimi:** We’re too busy kissing and being in love to see your ugly face

**Kunimi:** Iwaizumi can come tho

**Oikawa:** EXCUSE ME?

**Oikawa:** KUNIMI STOP TRYING TO STEAL IWAIZUMI

**Kunimi:** I have a boyfriend

**Kuroo:** Seijoh is so scary

**Akaashi:** I agree

\--

**Kuroo** and  **Oikawa:**

**Kuroo:** I think Kenma’s sad?

**Kuroo:** He’s been really quiet this week

**Oikawa:** What? What’s wrong with him?

**Kuroo:** Idk. He’s just quiet?

**Kuroo:** Like he won’t respond to me that much and he spaces out a lot more than usual 

**Kuroo:** I’m really worried but I know he won’t bring it up if something’s bothering him

**Oikawa:** Well.. have you tried talking to him first?

**Kuroo:** Yes! Of course I have!!

**Kuroo:** He gets really distant when he’s upset though, and he won’t really talk about it and if I do bring it up, he finds a way to leave. 

**Kuroo:** And there’s been a few times where I come home and he’s crying, but he just avoids the subject

**Kuroo:** IDK WHAT TO DO OIKAWA HELP

**Kuroo:** I know he’ll come to me when he’s ready but I want to try and help him

**Oikawa:** I can try talking to him

**Oikawa:** Just be clingy to him

**Kuroo:** I am. He’s asleep in my lap right now

**Kuroo:** Everytime I come home recently he’s been like clinging to me

**Oikawa:** Awww aw awww

**Oikawa:** Maybe we can arrange a weekend trip

**Oikawa:** I’ll bring Shouyou

**Kuroo:** Okay. I’m sure he’d love that

—

**Oikawa** and  **Kenma**

**Oikawa:** Are you okay?

**Oikawa:** Kuroo told me what’s going on

**Kenma:** I guess I’m fine

**Oikawa:** You guess?

**Kenma:** Idk like

**Kenma:** I’ve been weirdly upset recently and I don’t know why

**Kenma:** Like I kind of just always want to cry because I’m so ugly and annoying and stupid

**Kenma:** And like I feel like everything sucks for some reason

**Kenma:** And I love Kuro so much and I feel bad that I’m just upset

**Kenma:** But I know he’s trying and that he’s confused

**Kenma:** But also I don’t want to bring it up to him because I just feel so bad?

**Oikawa:** Why? 

**Oikawa:** He cares about you and loves you and wants you to be okay. He’s there for you to lean on when you’re upset.

**Kenma:** Yeah but.. What if I’m bothering him by talking about it? What if it’s stupid?

**Oikawa:** It’s definitely not stupid

**Oikawa:** Kuroo literally loves you so much. Like, I’m not sure I’ve met anyone more in love than he is in my life. He’s a little ridiculous for that

**Oikawa:** But he wants to be there for you 

**Kenma:** Yeah

**Oikawa:** Do I need to come visit you?

**Kenma:** That might be fun…

**Oikawa:** Do I need to bring Shouyou?

**Kenma:** I haven’t seen him in a while either…

**Oikawa:** Okay. 

**Oikawa:** We can come tomorrow?

**Kenma:** That’s such late notice for you guys though

**Oikawa:** If you need us, we can make it happen

**Kenma:** Saturday is in like three days, just come then

**Oikawa:** Okay.. and in the meantime, talk to Kuroo

**Oikawa:** He cares about you

**Oikawa:** We all do

**Oikawa:** And also he’s messaging me about how worried he is about you, so something tells me he won’t be bothered if you talk about your problems with him

**Kenma:** I guess you’re right

**Oikawa:** I am. Like always

**Kenma:** I hate you

**Kenma:** 💝

\--

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  _ OMG _

**Daichi:** ???

**Sugawara:** !!!

**Kuroo:** Oikawa and Hinata came over because Kenma’s been really sad recently

**Sugawara:** Omg really?? Is he okay now??

**Kuroo:** Yeah I think so!!! He’s been doing better the last two days

**Sugawara:** That’s good!!!

**Akaashi:** Good good good

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** They’re all sleeping and cuddling lol

**Kuroo:** It’s so cute

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** AWWW

**Kageyama:** Aw omg

**Iwaizumi:** They’re so cute

**Iwaizumi:** I’m glad Tooru and Hinata went to see him

**Kuroo:** Me too!!

  
  



	102. I wanted to be scarier but I’m merely dipping my toes in the water. Also I wrote this on my phone so a million things are probably incorrect and spelled wrong teehee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tanaka: Are you okay???!!
> 
> Tanaka: Do you need anything???
> 
> Kiyoko: ????!?!!
> 
> Nishinoya: Attention 🥺 and Asahi🥺🥺

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ HELP _

**Sugawara:** Is everything alright?

**Tanaka:** Are you okay???!!

**Tanaka:** Do you need anything???

**Kiyoko:** ????!?!!

**Nishinoya:** Attention 🥺 and Asahi🥺🥺

**Daichi:** Noya, you can’t just freak people out like that

**Nishinoya:** No you dont get it. 

**Nishinoya:** This is URGENT

**Nishinoya:** I feel like I’m dying because of it

**Kiyoko:** Where’s Asahi?

**Tanaka:** It’s so late to be thinking of this lol

**Nishinoya:** I know

**Nishinoya:** Asahi is at his place

**Nishinoya:** He’s doing homework

**Nishinoya:** Actually, maybe he’s sleeping right now

**Nishinoya:** He would have replied when I changed the group name

**Nishinoya:** He hates me and thinks I’m annoying so he needed a break from me and would rather do homework than even look at me

**Tanaka:** DON'T SAY THAT NOYA

**Kiyoko:** Asahi is crazy about you lol he talks about you all the time

**Nishinoya:** Then why isn’t he here 😠

**Sugawara:** Didn’t you just say he was doing homework?

**Nishinoya:** 😠😠😠

**Nishinoya:** I need attention!

**Sugawara:** We’re paying attention to you right now

**Nishinoya:** I need my boyfriends love and affection but WHERE IS HE

**Tanaka:** Lol okay calm down

**Nishinoya:** I just want Asahi 🥺

**Nishinoya:** Oh no oh no I finally broke him. He found out that I’m annoying and ran away so he doesn't have to deal with me

**Kiyoko:** “found out that I’m annoying”

**Daichi:** How do you even find that out noya

**Nishinoya:** So I’m always annoying???

**Kiyoko:** Yes but it’s a cute annoying

**Kiyoko:** Like the kind of annoying I can’t picture my life without

**Nishinoya:** Kiyoko🥺

**Tanaka:** Lmaooo Noya, your energy tonight

**Nishinoya:** I want to cry oh no oh no

**Nishinoya:** Asahi isn’t even replying

**Nishinoya:** I sent him messages on everything 😞

**Daichi:** Maybe he did fall asleep

**Nishinoya:** He should have called me

**Nishinoya:** So we can fall asleep on the phone

**Nishinoya:** He was probably so tired 🥺 And I didn’t even get to hear him talk to me when he’s sleepy and his voice is so quiet and soothing

**Nishinoya:** Why didn’t he call me 😠😠

**Sugawara:** do you guys always do that?

**Nishinoya:** no, usually we just text or snapchat

**Sugawara:** then why would he do that

**Nishinoya:** 😠

**Sugawara:** noya omg

**Asahi:** Noya I’m here!! Sorry

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI

**Tanaka:** ASAHI

**Asahi:** I’m so sorry my phone was so dead

**Nishinoya:** I THOUGHT YOU HATED ME

**Asahi:** of course not!

**Asahi:** I’m omw to your place right now

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI WHAT IT’S SO LATE YOU DON’T HAVE TO

**Asahi:** I want to

**Asahi:** I barely saw you today

**Nishinoya:** Did you finish your homework though?

**Asahi:** i did

**Nishinoya:** Okay then, the door is unlocked🥺

**Tanaka:** how are you 🥺 and 😠

**Nishinoya:** Asahi is coming over I’m SO EXCITED

-

**Asahi:** I got here and Noya was just laying on his bed

**Asahi:** Cuddling the stuffed rabbit I won him a while ago lol

**Asahi:** And then he jumped on me right when he saw me lol

**Kiyoko:** aw that’s so cute

**Tanaka:** Is he asleep now?

**Asahi:** No lol, he’s just sort of hugging my arm and playing with my fingers

**Asahi:** I’m gonna go lol he’s pouting

**Sugawara:** hm I think I’m GONNA GO SCREAM AT MY NEIGHBOR BECAUSE THATS SO CUTE

**Daichi:** lol Suga it’s so late baby, go to bed

**Sugawara:** DAICHI WHAT IF I MISS SOMETHING CUTE

**Daichi:** I promise you won’t and if you do, you can read it in the morning 

-

  
  


**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ Head Empty Just Tobio and I’m shaking I’m So SCARED _

**Hinata:** Stop thinking about him wtf

**Oikawa:** I CANT

**Oikawa:** DO YOU THINK I WANT HIM TO BE IN MY BRAIN

**Kuroo:** Some character development

**Oikawa:** NO NO YOU DON'T GET IT LIKE AHH

**Oikawa:** Like his name is just stuck in my head

**Oikawa:** And like I can’t stop thinking about his voice and like AHHH I CAN JUST SEE HIS STUPID SMILE OR HIS STUPID SLEEPING FACE GET OUT GET OUT

**Atsumu:** Ah his sleeping face looks so cute. Like you just wanna cuddle him and never let go

**Hinata:** RIGHT RIGHT

**Hinata:** WAIT SHUT UP ATSUMU

**Oikawa:** SUGA PLEASE TRADE SONS WITH ME

**Oikawa:** I LOVE YOU SHOUYOU BUT I NEED TOBIO TO BE MY SON

**Sugawara:** No, don’t ever ask such a stupid question

**Sugawara:** I love you so much Hinata but no

**Hinata:** I’m unwanted

**Kageyama:** no don’t say that

**Oikawa:** AH TOBIO LEAVE

**Kageyama:** ?

**Oikawa:** YOU CANT BE IN MY BRAIN 24/7 AND IN THE CHAT

**Kageyama:** I don’t want to leave though

**Hinata:** Yamayama you should come over whenever your free today

**Kageyama:** I can come over now?

**Hinata:** YAY

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Oikawa:** KOUSHI PLEASE

**Sugawara: 🙃** No

  
  


-

  
  


**Bokuto:** _ Attached image _

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI IM SORRY

**Akaashi:** It’s fine

**Bokuto:** I REALLY DIDNT MEAN TO IM SO SORRY

**Akaashi:** it’s okay Bokuto, it made me laugh

**Kageyama:** Akaashi, your nose is bleeding?? What happened???

**Bokuto:** I accidentally head butted him!!

**Bokuto:** FORGIVE ME AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** I forgave you right when it happened lol

**Oikawa:** how did you even get into that situation

**Bokuto:** IT WAS AN ACCIDENT

**Bokuto:** WE WERE UM 

**Bokuto:** IN BED

**Bokuto:** AND I WAS GRABBING UM

**Bokuto:** SOMETHING FROM THE DRAWER

**Bokuto:** AND I WHIPPED AROUND REALLY QUICK AND I DIDNT REALIZE THAT HE WAS LEANING INTO ME AND LIKE I BUMPED HIM SUPER SUPER HARD ON HIS NOSE

**Akaashi:** It barely hurt

**Bokuto:** BUT YOURE BLEEDING

**Akaashi:** lol it’s fine Bokuto I promise

**Akaashi:** it stopped

**Bokuto:** OH THANK GOD

**Akaashi:** now say goodbye to everyone so we can continue

**Bokuto:** OKAY AHAH GOODBYE EVERYONE

**Nishinoya: 😳** 🥴🥴🤰🏻

  
  


-

**Yamaguchi:** Throwback to when Tsukki just assumed we were dating before he even asked me to be his boyfriend

**Tsukishima:** I hate that

**Yamaguchi:** lmao

**Kenma:** How did that happen

**Tsukishima:** We would hold hands when we walked home and like

**Tsukishima:** I’d kiss him before we said goodbye every night so like..

**Tsukishima:** Idk I just thought we were already together

**Yamaguchi:** lol it’s kinda funny Tsukki

**Yamaguchi:** I guess you were just so in love with me that you couldn’t even wait to make it official lol

**Tsukishima:** I guess so

**Yamaguchi:** AHH HE AGREED TSUKKI TSUKKI I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

**Tsukishima:** lol why wouldn’t I agree

**Kenma:** CUTE CUTE SO CUTE 

**Yamaguchi:** IM GONNA DIE IN THREE MINUTES

**Kenma:** I'M COMING WITH YOU

**Kenma:** SEE YOU IN HELL TSUKISHIMA

**Tsukishima:** why me

-

**Yamaguchi** added  **Chikara Ennoshita**

**Ennoshita:** ew I hate it here Tadashi

**Daichi:** Hey Ennoshita 

**Ennoshita:** Hey Daichi!

**Nishinoya:** ENNOSHITA

**Ennoshita:** Noya!

**Ennoshita:** Anyways, I hate it here. Goodbye

**Ennoshita** left the group

**Yamaguchi:** AH

**Yamaguchi:** I WENT TO SEND A PLAYLIST TO SOMEONE

**Yamaguchi:** AND ACCIDENTALLY SENT THE WRONG PLAYLIST TO THE WRONG PERSON

**Daichi:** Ennoshita 🙁

**Daichi:** wait what does that have to do with Ennoshita

**Yamaguchi:** I SENT MY SEX PLAYLIST TO HIM SO I THOUGHT I COULD DISTRACT HIM WITH GROUPCHAT MESSAGES BUT HES TOO FAST

**Daichi:** it’s okay lol it’s just a playlist

**Yamaguchi:** NO NO ITS EMBARRASSING LIKE THE NAME AND ALL

**Tanaka** added  **Chikara Ennoshita** to the group

**Tanaka:** WHATS THE PLAYLIST CALLED

**Ennoshita:** _ Attached image _

**Ennoshita** left the group

**Nishinoya:** HHAHA THE NAME HAAH “fuck me tsukki” 

**Nishinoya:** YAMAGUCHI

**Oikawa:** okay but the picture? Kinda 🥵🥵

**Tsukishima:** don’t say that about me

**Oikawa:** ʕʘ‿ʘʔ

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI FRESH OUT OF THE SHOWER

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi omg

**Tsukishima:** at least the songs are good 

**Yamaguchi:** The Internet is such a good group✨✨

**Oikawa:** maybe I’m not the only one with superior music taste

**Oikawa:** _ Attached image _

**Oikawa:** we have some similarities already

**Yamaguchi:** ah how did I forget Confidently Lost omg

**Iwaizumi:** this is weird

**Kunimi:** I’m surprised you don’t fuck to any One Direction

**Oikawa:** WHAT ARE YOU SAYING

**Kunimi:** I remember that One Direction phase

**Oikawa:** THAT DOESNT MEAN I FUCK TO IT

**Kunimi:** Don’t be shy, send the whole playlist

**Iwaizumi:** I can confirm that we DO NOT fuck to One Direction

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t want people thinking I fuck to Fireproof

**Sugawara:** LMAO

**Sugawara:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** I think Pu$$y fairy is an essential to a solid sex playlist

**Akaashi:** The way that the cover is just a cute pic of you and Daichi what

**Sugawara:** HAHAHA SHUT UP

**Kenma:** Love the name “I want Daichi in me”

**Kenma:** aren’t you scared that people are gonna see your Spotify

**Sugawara:** I NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT OMG

**Kunimi:** Oikawa, take notes from Suga’s playlist and add better songs

**Kunimi:** No offense to you Yamaguchi. You’re perfect and I love you💗

**Yamaguchi:** Aw💗

**Oikawa:** KUNIMI I BET YOU GUYS FUCK TO ED SHEERAN

**Kunimi:** hell no

**Kindaichi:** That's offensive to me

**Sugawara:** HAHAHA ITS JUST A TEAM OMG

**Sugawara:** THEY FUCK TO GALWAY GIRL

**Akaashi:** SUGA LMAO

**Kiyoko:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:🙃**

**Asahi:** what do I do with this information?

**Kiyoko:** lol

**Sugawara:** My eyes did not just see a sex playlist from you, no. Kiyoko is most definitely a virgin and will stay that way forever

**Tanaka:** she most definitely is not

**Sugawara:** 🙃🙃

**Kiyoko:** lmaoooo

**Iwaizumi:** THE PLAYLIST NAME 

**Yamaguchi:** “Ryuu, but hard” lmaooo

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN CANT STOP LAUGHING AHAH

**Kiyoko:** lmao thank you thank you

**Sugawara:** 🙃🙃🙃 

**Tanaka:** HAHAH SUGA

**Sugawara:** it cant be true and I don’t want to think about that

**Tanaka:** _ Attached image _

**Tanaka:** That’s me and Kiyoko in the bath

**Tanaka:** post fuck

**Sugawara:** NO

**Nishinoya:** Wait Aw you guys look so cute there what

**Asahi:** right?? Like if I hadn’t known that was afterward I would’ve thought you were just taking a cute bath together

**Sugawara:** That’s simply just you and Kiyoko in the bath. And she just so happens to be very tired

**Tanaka:** _ Attached image _

**Tanaka:** Kiyoko in my shirt post fuck

**Sugawara:** all I see is Kiyoko in your shirt, sleepily smiling

**Tanaka:** Suga please don’t force me to send 😈😈 pics

**Sugawara:** you can't because 😈😈 pics of Kiyoko don’t exist

**Tanaka:** _ Attached image _

**Tanaka:** then what’s this?

**Sugawara:** AHHHH

**Tanaka:** ??

**Tanaka:** Suga why are you freaking out

**Tanaka:** a picture of Kiyoko sucking my dick can’t possibly be 😈😈

**Nishinoya:** She looks so in love🥺🥺

**Kuroo:** Noya, she’s literally sucking his dick

**Nishinoya:** And she’s doing so with so much love 🥺🥺

**Kiyoko:** HAHAH RYUU AND NOYA I CANT BREATHE

**Sugawara:** NO NO

**Tanaka:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** RYUUNOSUKE PLEASE

**Tanaka:** I don’t see a problem suga

**Tanaka:** A picture of Kiyoko riding me while wearing my shirt can’t possibly be 😈😈

**Tanaka:** after all, 😈😈 pics of Kiyoko don’t exist right??

**Sugawara:** AHHHHH NO NO IT CANT BE TRUE

**Kiyoko:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** KIYOKO PLEASE NO

**Kiyoko:** Suga, what’s wrong?

**Kiyoko:** Surely Tanaka with my legs around his head can’t be 😈😈

**Sugawara:** I GET IT I GET IT AHHH MAKE IT STOP

**Tanaka:** KIYOKO AHAHA

**Nishinoya:** YES RYUU A TRUE MAN GOES DOWN ON HIS QUEEN

**Kuroo:** That’s why I eat Kenma’s ass😎😎

**Kenma:** 🥰🥰

**Sugawara:** AHHH

**Daichi:** Guys omg he’s asking me to drown him omg

**Daichi:** HES CRYING BUT HES LAUGHING AND SHAKING AH

**Kindaichi:** Kageyama just goes to school with these people

**Kageyama:** it’s fun!

**Asahi:** poor Suga, his mental image of Kiyoko being an angel is ruined

**Kiyoko:** 😈

**Tanaka:** 😈

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	103. La La La La but I'm Mafuyu and you're Uenoyama

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima: Oikawa he’s still crying
> 
> Tsukishima: It’s been 2 hours and he’s still crying
> 
> Tsukishima: We’re enemies

_ HELP _

**Tsukishima:** _ Attached Image _

**Tsukishima:** I came home to this

**Kuroo:** I WOULD KILL TO COME HOME TO MAID KAGEYAMA EXCUSE ME

**Kuroo:** KENMA KENMA IMAGINE

**Kuroo:** I come home from work and you’re just cuddling maid Kageyama

**Kuroo:** OR JUST KAGEYAMA IN GENERAL AHHHH

**Kenma:** Kageyama brain rot omg

**Oikawa:** throuple

**Iwaizumi:** He looks so embarrassed

**Iwaizumi:** aww

**Tsukishima:** He is

**Tsukishima:** His boyfriend won’t stop screaming and taking pictures

**Sugawara:** SO CUTE KAGEYAMA

**Yamaguchi:** I told you guys it’d happen

**Akaashi:** He looks so cute omg

**Tanaka:** Were they just like, waiting at your place?

**Tsukishima:** I had one more class and we were hanging out beforehand so I told them they could just stay

**Hinata:** HE LOOKS SO CUTEMGOMG

**Kageyama:** I want to change

**Akaashi:** NO

**Oikawa:** NO

**Yamaguchi:** NO

**Kenma:** NO

**Kunimi:** nO NO NO

**Yamaguchi:** I’m not satisfied yet

**Kageyama:** And??

**Kuroo:** KEEP IT ON KAGEYAMA PLEASE

**Yamaguchi:** We’ll never get an opportunity like this again

**Kageyama:** I’ll keep it on for a few more minutes

**Yamaguchi:** YAY YAY

**Kenma** changed the group name to  _ We Love Kageyama _

-

**Yamaguchi:** Put a finger down if you’ve been craving Naruto recently but you refuse to put yourself through all of those episodes and you also don’t want to watch some of your favorites die again but you can’t stop thinking about Asuma and every time you do you just cry because you remember how he died and the cigarette falling from his lips and Shikamaru holding the lighter. And also how your favorite Naruto game was actually the one that included his death so you always just think of playing that too and how you had to be Shikamaru and walk into the village so sad because Asuma died right in front of you and like Kurenai was pregnant and just expecting him to come back and then you remember the scene from the anime with the flowers falling and then she’s starting to cry and like drops to her knees and Shikamaru sits with her. And that makes you think of Jiraya’s death and you start crying even more because Naruto’s dad was so cool but he died so early that he didn’t really have the chance to meet him so Jiraiya was the closest thing to a father figure (No disrespect to Iruka because I love him so much). And as you’re typing this out you’re actually starting to cry a little so you’re gonna stop.

**Yamaguchi:** teehee?

**Tsukishima:** We agreed that you can’t watch Naruto alone

**Tsukishima:** The idea of you crying so hard in your room alone pisses me off

**Yamaguchi:** idk why I avoid watching because of the deaths when they play in my mind so vividly like it’s the same thing teehee

**Oikawa:** OmgOMG OKAy

**Oikawa:** I refuse to watch Boruto because I hate a lot of the girl characters and seeing them again might make me 🤢 But ASUMA’S DEATH

**Oikawa:** TADASHI

**Oikawa:** I HAVEN’T HEALED YET AND YOU BRING HIM UP SO EARLY ON

**Asahi:** Didn’t that come out like forever ago?

**Oikawa:** I haven’t healed yet

**Kenma:** That was so long ago what

**Oikawa:** I HAVEN’T HEALED YET

**Kenma:** Why did you yell at me and not Asahi

**Oikawa:** I’d never yell at Asahi

**Oikawa:** EW EW TADASHI REMEMBER HOW SAD NARUTO WAS WHEN JIRAIYA DIED AND IRUKA AND SHIKAMARU WERE THERE

**Oikawa:** TSUNADE BEING SO SO SAD BECAUSE THEY WERE SO CLOSE SHUT UP

**Yamaguchi:** DON’T EVER SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT TO ME AGAIN

**Yamaguchi:** IM CRYING SO HARD IM CRYING SO HARD

**Tsukishima:** I’m coming over

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI HURRY 

-

**Tsukishima:** Oikawa he’s still crying

**Tsukishima:** It’s been 2 hours and he’s still crying

**Tsukishima:** We’re enemies

**Kageyama:** lmao

**Oikawa:** What did I do?????!!!

**Tsukishima:** You made him cry

**Tsukishima:** Therefore we’re enemies

**Oikawa:** TSUKKI

**Tsukishima:** don’t call me that

**Kuroo:** HAHAHAH

-

**Sugawara:** Thinking about Daichi today

**Sugawara:** I mean I do that all the time but like I just love him so much

**Sugawara:** He just lives in my braino 🥰

**Daichi:** Aw Suga

**Daichi:** I think about you everyday too 🥰

**Sugawara:** Good, I should be the only thing you think about

**Daichi:** omg

**Kuroo:** SUGA

**Sugawara:** 😚

**Daichi:** 😚

**Kuroo:** I love watching brain rot happen

**Sugawara:** I just love him the most like AHH

**Sugawara:** I think love doesn’t even come close to describing how I feel

**Sugawara:** I love him so much

**Oikawa:** Aw that’s so sweet

**Daichi:** Thinking about how my mom cried when I told her we were dating and I thought she was homophobic but it turns out she was just so happy

**Daichi:** And then she threw her book at me because she said I’m dumb and if I took any longer she wouldn’t feel bad for me if Suga started dating someone else

**Sugawara:** I love my idiot boyfriend 🥰

**Asahi:** I thought it was kinda obvious that Suga liked you lol

**Tanaka:** IT WAS SO OBVIOUS

**Daichi:** Lets not start with that 

**Sugawara:** Thinking about how I sucked your dick before we even kissed 🥰

**Daichi:** Lets not start with that either

**Sugawara:** Daichi I just love you so much

**Kuroo:** THIS IS SO CUTE AH

**Kuroo:** SUGA AND DAICHI SUGA AND DAICHI

**Kenma:** Why are you guys awake right now

**Kenma:** Kuro I’m cold and sleepy come hug me 😡

**Kuroo:** AHH COMING

**Sugawara:** Thinking about me being super close and touchy with Asahi to get a reaction from Daichi but all I got was Daichi telling Noya and Noya being upset even though we told him about the plan

**Daichi:** Okay no that’s embarrassing lets not start with that

**Asahi:** I love my idiot boyfriend 🥰

**Nishinoya:** 🥰

**Tanaka:** CUTE IM CRYING

**Sugawara:** Thinking about how I gave Daichi cookies on Valentines day and he said thanks and put it in his bag right in front of me and I saw just so many gifts from other people and went home and wanted to die

**Daichi:** Suga that’s just sad

**Sugawara:** No no no it’s fine because that same night your mom called me and said they tasted good

**Sugawara:** And I was so happy because she sent me a picture of you guys eating them and you looked so happy

**Oikawa:** Thinking about how Shouyou had chocolate for the whole team but he was too scared to give Kageyama his so he threw it at him and ran to his bike

**Tanaka:** WHAT AHHA

**Oikawa:** He was scared Kageyama was going to hit him

**Oikawa:** I love my idiot son 🥰

**Sugawara:** Thinking about how Kageyama asked me for dating advice and I was so excited because I thought he was going out with Hinata so i called Daichi and we screamed about it and then he showed up to practice a few weeks later with Atsumu’s sweater on and me and Daichi were heartbroken

**Oikawa:** That pisses me off wtf

**Sugawara:** And like sometimes Atsumu would wait for him after practice and they’d walk together and me and Daichi would just 💔👄💔

**Oikawa:** HAHAHA Shouyou would complain about how Kageyama has no time for him because he’s always out with Atsumu but that was before he realized he liked him lmao

**Sugawara:** Our idiot sons 🥰


	104. Did I make the characters needy because that's how I feel? Yes. Anyways I just projected all over this episode. Also I'm so cold and I have coffee jitters because I forgot to eat so typing was literally so hard. I'll just edit it ;later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: Will you be the big spoon?
> 
> Iwaizumi: Why are you texting all of this omg just ask me out loud instead of embarrassing me
> 
> Oikawa: Will you be the big spoon Iwa-chan?????

_ We Love Kageyama _

**Yaku:** guys look at Lev

**Yaku:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo: 🤢🤢**

**Kenma:** shut up Kuro 

**Kenma:** AHHH CUDDLING YOURE CUDDLING SO CUTE HES SO BIG AND HES JUST HUGGING YOU WITH HIS HEAD ON YOUR STOMACH

**Sugawara:** Awww is he sleeping?

**Yaku:** lmao yes and he’s so heavy I might have to wake him

**Yaku:** I just wanted everyone to see first

**Kageyama:** That’s so cute 

**Kageyama:** I want to cuddle :-(

**Kuroo:** ME ME CUDDLE WITH ME

**Kageyama:** maybe if you were here lol

**Yaku:** Where’s Hinata?

**Kageyama:** he’s got classes until later tonight

**Kageyama:** it’s fine I’ll just die without him

**Tsukishima:** so dramatic 

**Kageyama:** nope, just honest

**Sugawara:** Aw, Kageyama if you’re lonely you can come over! Daichi is here, he’s playing video games

**Kageyama:** Okay!! I’ll be right over

**Oikawa:** you disgust me

**Sugawara:** you just wish you were me😋

**Kageyama:** Suga, I’m almost there!

**Sugawara:** okay, we’ll leave the door unlocked

**Sugawara:** notice how Tooru hasn’t said anything🥰

**Iwaizumi:** lmaoooo

-

  
  


**Sugawara:** by the way

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** Daich took this picture of me and Kageyama baking

**Sugawara:** I thought you’d all like to see it because you’re all in love with him lmao

**Oikawa:** AHHHHH

**Bokuto:** CUTE CUTE

-

**Akaashi:** KENMA LOOK AT ME

**Kenma:** Akaashi we’re texting what

**Akaashi:** I CANT STOP CRYING

**Kenma:** ?? 

**Bokuto:** HE CANT STOP CRYING KENMA LIKE ACTUALLY

**Kenma:** ?!!?

**Akaashi:** _ Attached Image _

**Kenma:** yay you got it!

**Akaashi:** WHY THOUGH WHY WHY

**Kenma:** Because you wanted it??

**Akaashi:** STOP BUYING ME THINGS WTF

**Hinata:** omg are those the strawberry plushies that someone posted on tik tok

**Akaashi:** YES I SENT IT TO KENMA JUST SAYING HOW CUTE IT IS AND THAT I WANT A MILLION AND HE BOUGHT ME ONE

**Akaashi:** BITCH I’LL KISS YOU

**Kenma:** good😍

**Akaashi:** HAHAHA SHUT UP

**Akaashi:** IM LITERALLY GONNA SLEEP WITH IT EVERY NIGHT UNTIL I MURDER YOU

**Kenma:** You’re welcome?

**Akaashi:** KENMA LITERALLY THANK YOU IM CRYJNF STOP BUYING ME THINGS

**Kenma:** DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO

**Akaashi:** DONT SPEND MONEY ON ME LOSER OR ELSE

**Kenma:** OR ELSE WHAT

**Akaashi:** OR ELSE IM EATING YOUR ASS

**Kenma:** OOPS JUST BOUGHT YOU SOMETHING ELSE

**Akaashi:** AHAHAHA I HATE YOU I HATE YOU

**Bokuto:** Akaashi is so happy omg

**Bokuto:** He’s just hugging the strawberry lol 

**Bokuto:** My heart is so warm right now

**Bokuto:** okay he wants hugs, goodbye for now

**Kunimi:** this is so weird yet so cute? Like what the fuck

**Kunimi:** Wait Wait Wait the strawberry is so cute I just looked at it now I WANT ONE

**Kindaichi:** not saying I just bought you one but I did

**Kunimi:** STOP STOP

-

**Akaashi:** I’m an unapproachable bitch

**Kuroo:** you aren’t

**Akaashi:** my mom said I was

**Bokuto:** you aren’t!

**Bokuto:** Why would she call you a bitch

**Akaashi:** oh I added that part lol 

**Akaashi:** she said that I don’t look stuck up I just look like talking to people isn’t necessary and I seem unfriendly

**Akaashi:** which is true but I think I’m friendly once you get to know me

**Sugawara:** I wouldn’t say unapproachable, just maybe intimidating at first but not unfriendly at all!

**Akaashi:** yeah I get that a lot

**Akaashi:** it made me cry for like two seconds but then I remembered that I don’t really like talking to new people so I stopped crying

**Sugawara:** are you okay lately?

**Sugawara:** you seem so… ???

**Akaashi:** vulnerable? I’m feeling like it

**Akaashi:** idk what’s happening to me. Maybe it’s the moon or something that’s making me feel so off

**Sugawara:** well, you can always talk to me if you feel down or anything!

**Akaashi:** 💘

**Bokuto:** PEOPLE ARE PROBABLY INTIMIDATED BECAUSE YOURE SO PRETTY

**Akaashi:** or they all hate me because I’m ugly

**Bokuto:** NO DONT SAY THAT

**Akaashi:** no no it’s just the truth

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI YOURE MAKING ME SAD 

**Akaashi:** Don’t be sad Bokuto

**Akaashi:** also, are you coming over after work?

**Bokuto:** YES

**Akaashi:** 💘💘

**Bokuto:** IM SO EXCITED

**Kenma:** the way he just changes the subject😻😻

**Akaashi:** shhhh

-

**Oikawa:** I slept for an hour and a half last night😍

**Oikawa:** I’m so tired😍

**Iwaizumi:** oh god, where are you? I can pick you up

**Oikawa:** I won’t be done until later😍 I have some more stuff to do😍

**Sugawara:** Oikawa it’s 7AM, why did you sleep so late??

**Oikawa:** 😍

**Iwaizumi:** oh god the emoji keyboard is coming out

**Oikawa:** it’s fine😍 I just want to cry because I’m tired😍

**Oikawa:** I fell asleep in the shower this morning😍

**Iwaizumi:** I can at least drop you a coffee or something?

**Oikawa:** I’ll love you forever if you do that😍

**Iwaizumi;** okay lol, I’m on my way

**Yamaguchi:** Are you able to take a nap?

**Oikawa:** when I get home😍 so around like five😍

**Yamaguchi:** oh? Just sleep until tomorrow

**Oikawa:** that sounds so😍

**Iwaizumi:** you’re texting like a maniac omg

**Oikawa:** 😍

**Kuroo:** I’m laughing but I’m concerned 

**Oikawa:** 😍

**Iwaizumi:** omg

-

**Oikawa:** I just got up from my nap(๑･̑◡･̑๑)

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan bought me dinner

**Sugawara:** That’s good. Eat and then go to sleep

**Oikawa:** I literally feel so heavy

**Iwaizumi:** He ran into the wall on his way to the table

**Sugawara:** Oikawa omg

**Oikawa:** I’m just so tired

**Iwaizumi:** I know baby, so eat and then we can go to sleep

**Oikawa:** I wanna play animal crossing

**Iwaizumi:** okay we can play after we eat and then we’re sleeping

**Oikawa:** (￣ー￣)

**Daichi:** Why don’t you want to go to sleep? You’ve been up all day

**Oikawa:** I’m so tired Daichi you don’t get it

**Daichi:** when I’m tired, I go to sleep

**Oikawa:** But I want to talk to youuuu

**Daichi:** I’ll be here in the morning

**Oikawa:** you don’t get it you don’t get it

**Oikawa:** Suga I miss you

**Sugawara:** I miss you too lol

**Oikawa:** I’m gonna cry omgomg

**Sugawara:** Don’t cry omg just eat and then sleep

**Oikawa:** No, I want to talk to you (づ ◕‿◕ )づ

**Sugawara:** lol you can talk to me in the morning ☺️

**Iwaizumi:** get off your phone and eat, stupid

**Oikawa:** (⇀‸↼‶)

**Sugawara:** Oikawa stop being insane. Go eat lol

**Oikawa:** you just hate me

**Sugawara:** I don’t 

**Oikawa:** you do you do

**Iwaizumi:** Omg he doesn’t

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan you just want me to shut up 

**Oikawa:** You just never want to talk to me again

**Oikawa:** You don’t love me

**Iwaizumi:** You know that isn’t true

**Oikawa:** It is true

**Iwaizumi:** You’re so needy when you’re tired

**Iwaizumi:** Actually, you’re just needy all the time

**Oikawa:** (ಥ﹏ಥ)

**Oikawa:** I just want you to love me

**Iwaizumi:** And I just want you to sleep because you’re exhausted

**Iwaizumi:** If you eat dinner now, we can play like 30 minutes of animal crossing and then we’ll go to bed

**Oikawa:** Will you kiss me before I sleep?

**Iwaizumi:** I always do

**Oikawa:** Will you be the big spoon?

**Iwaizumi:** Why are you texting all of this omg just ask me out loud instead of embarrassing me

**Oikawa:** Will you be the big spoon Iwa-chan?????

**Iwaizumi:** Omg yes I will

**Oikawa:** Fine

**Iwaizumi:** He’s eating now. Sorry about that guys lol

**Daichi:** There’s nothing to apologize for. We just wanted to make sure he was okay lol

**Iwaizumi:** Thanks

**Sugawara:** You should go pay attention to him lol

**Iwaizumi:** Yeah lol he’s pouting right now. Night!

**Sugawara:** Goodnight!

**-**

**Yamaguchi:** My parents be ✨fighting✨

**Tsukishima:** Oh?

**Kageyama:** ????

**Yamaguchi:** It’s nothing serious

**Yamaguchi:** it’s just enough to annoy me and make me want to die

**Tsukishima:** You come home tomorrow though

**Yamaguchi:** I know, I wish it were tonight 

**Yamaguchi:** When will they stop arguing

**Yamaguchi:** Not my mom threatening to run away lmaooo

**Yamaguchi:** Throwback to when my brother ran away and I gave him a backpack

**Yamaguchi:** Apparently I was supposed to tell him to stay

**Yamaguchi:** Oh well, he came back the next day

**Tsukishima:** lmaooo

**Yamaguchi:** They’re just yelling

**Yamaguchi:** pack it up Marriage Story

**Kuroo:** Tsukki, shouldn’t you be concerned??

**Yamaguchi:** Nah, he’s fine. They argue every sunday

**Yamaguchi:** He’s there for it sometimes

**Yamaguchi:** Ew, that's so awkward for you.

**Yamaguchi:** I’m sorry Tsukki

**Tsukishima:** Why are you thinking of that right now. Shut up lol

**Yamaguchi:** I’m suddenly embarrassed lmao

**Tsukishima:** It’s fine

**Tsukishima:** They only argue for like thirty minutes and then things are back to normal

**Yamaguchi:** This one is different because apparently my mom feels sick so she’s been angry all morning 😎

**Yamaguchi:** And she blamed minor inconveniences on me today 😎 Like girl what am I supposed to do?? Heal you? Idk

**Sugawara:** You’re something else Yamaguchi

**Tsukishima:** He’s probably just uncomfortable right now

**Yamaguchi:** I am!! Like I want to die 

**Yamaguchi:** oops she’s going to her room and slamming every door possible

**Yamaguchi:** Loud noises make us feel guilty I guess🥺

**Tsukishima:** Omg 

**Yamaguchi:** Anyways, I’m about to go get some coffee with my dad lol

**Yamaguchi:** See you tomorrow Tsukki

**Tsukishima:** 💗

**Tanaka:** What was any of that


	105. When I cant stop spending money on you because I'm sad and feel annoying and it weirdly makes me feel better idk anyways i'm the worst bitch out here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: Rip Tobio I guess 🥰 See you never 😘

_ We Love Kageyama _

**Yaku:** Lev’s new roommate is so

**Yaku:** Fucking horrible omfg

**Kuroo:** Ew, you’re still in this chat?

**Yaku:** Shut the fuck up

**Kenma:** Shut the fuck up

**Sugawara:** Why’s his roommate horrible?

**Yaku:** Omg okay so

**Yaku:** He’s been dying to rant about it to someone who isn’t me so like

**Yaku:** I’m going to add him

**Yaku** added  **Lev Haiba** to the chat

**Hinata:** LEV!! HELLO!!

**Lev:** HINATA!!!

**Kunimi:** Ew

**Sugawara:** Hello!!

**Lev:** HI!!

**Sugawara:** What’s up with your roommate?

**Lev:** OMG 

**Lev:** OKAY SO LIKE

**Lev:** I’m still dorming? Because I don’t have a job right now and I can’t afford to pay rent out of pocket and the dorms are covered with tuition 

**Lev:** And like. I had a roommate, but they transferred out and my room was empty for a while which was really nice because that meant that Yaku could come over and spend the night whenever he wanted!!!!

**Yaku:** Stop! Don’t be embarrassing!

**Lev:** No!! You’re so cute Yaku!!!

**Kenma:** Awww

**Kuroo:** 🤢🤢

**Kenma:** Kuro stop it

**Lev:** Stop being jealous, Kuroo

**Kuroo:** JEALOUS??

**Kuroo:** Baby your first choice crush is here in my bed, I’m not jealous

**Kenma:** KURO DON’T BE SO MEAN

**Yaku:** Isn’t Kenma everyone’s first choice?

**Hinata:** Yes 

**Kageyama:** Um?

**Akaashi:** Yes

**Kuroo:** STOP???

**Lev:** ANYWAYS SO MY ROOMMATE

**Lev:** So he moved in like two weeks ago and I’m so miserable 

**Lev:** I’ve been staying at Yaku’s most of the time because it like.. Weirdly depresses me to be home?

**Kuroo:** Is that why you’ve been so quiet at practice?? Who is he?? Where do you live?? I’ll pull up

**Lev:** Kuroo!! Stop

**Daichi:** He… Depresses you??

**Lev:** Yeah idk

**Lev:** He’s really messy and he always leaves dishes in the sink. And I don’t really cook so I don’t go in the kitchen much but he leaves them until they start smelling which is annoying

**Lev:** And like he made a weird comment about Yaku a while ago, and it made me really mad

**Lev:** Also he doesn’t brush his teeth or clean up after himself

**Lev:** I feel like I’m living with a 14 year old boy whose mom cleans up after him 

**Sugawara:** That’s horrible wtf

**Oikawa:** Ew. Can’t you do something?

**Lev:** I’m seeing if I can move out early so I can move in with Yaku, or at least move into a different dorm!

**Kuroo:** Oh good

**Kuroo:** Get out of that. It sounds horrible!

**Kuroo:** If you ever need to, you can come over to mine and Kenma’s

**Lev:** Aww! Kuroo!!

**Atsumu:** Ew ew ew

**Atsumu:** I had an ex that was like that

**Hinata:** Don’t say that about Tobio!!

**Atsumu:** TOBIO WASN’T THE ONLY PERSON I DATED BEFORE KITA WTF

**Atsumu:** We were together for a year and a half, and like I lived with him

**Atsumu:** Kinda wanted to marry him ngl

**Atsumu:** And then he cheated on me lolol

**Atsumu:** But anyways. I always had to clean up after him because all he ever wanted to do was play video games

**Atsumu:** He, like, never cooked or never cleaned 

**Atsumu:** And for some reason I still cried over him?? Yeah right. Ew

**Atsumu:** BUT LIKE LOL OOPS SORRY FOR RANTING

**Atsumu:** Anyways. Get out of that situation!! People like that are like roaches and all they know how to do is be a leech to everyone around them.

**Sugawara:** God damn lol

**Kageyama:** I didn’t know what happened to you

**Atsumu:** It was after we broke up so we didn’t really talk that much

**Kageyama:** :-(

**Atsumu:** Lmfaoooo

**Atsumu:** I’m literally not upset about it anymore

**Lev:** Are you dating someone now???

**Atsumu:** Yes! Kita Shinsuke!!!!

**Atsumu:** He’s the love of my life

**Atsumu:** Omg omg omg like he’s so cute

**Atsumu:** Omg omg omg like

**Atsumu:** He lives a few hours away right now because he had to move back home to take care of his dad because he just got into kind of a bad accident and his mom isn’t really in the picture

**Atsumu:** and LIKE OMG

**Atsumu:** He calls me before he goes to sleep so that we can fall asleep on the phone together, and he calls me as soon as he wakes up in the morning

**Atsumu:** I usually wake up a lot earlier than he does but there’s been a few times where the phone going off has woken me up and he’ll be totally rude and tell me I need to wake up anyways because it’s ‘so late’

**Atsumu:** No Kita it’s 10am

**Atsumu:** But waking up early is worth it if I get to talk to him and hear his cute sleepy morning voice

**Kageyama:** Omg Atsumu you’re being so cute right now

**Atsumu:** TOBIO STOP FLIRTING WITH ME CAN’T YOU SEE I’M IN LOVE WITH KITA

**Kageyama:** IDIOT

**Atsumu:** DUMBASS

**Lev:** AHAHAHAH

\--

**Kuroo** and  **Sugawara:**

**Sugawara:** Hey 

**Sugawara:** I’ve been calling you for the past two days.

**Sugawara:** Where did you go??

**Sugawara:** Don’t tell me your cat killed you or something

**Kuroo:** No lol

**Sugawara:** ????

**Kuroo:** Idk I’ve just been a little off recently

**Kuroo:** It’s fine though

**Sugawara:** It’s fine?

**Sugawara:** Doesn’t sound very fine

**Kuroo:** It is, trust me

**Kuroo:** It’s fine, it’s fine

**Kuroo:** I’ll talk to you tomorrow, though, I’m going to go to sleep

**Sugawara:** It’s 7pm..

**Kuroo:** It’s fine it’s fine

**Sugawara:** Stop saying that??

**Kuroo:** It’s fine it’s fine

-

**Kuroo:** OKAY IT’S 4AM

**Kuroo:** AND I KNOW I SAID IT WAS FINE BUT LIKE

**Kuroo:** IDK I GUESS IT’S NOT

**Kuroo:** AND IT’S SO STUPID

**Sugawara:** What’s going on?? Do you want me to call you?

**Kuroo:** I think if I called I would be embarrassed 

**Sugawara:** Okay okay

**Sugawara:** What’s happening?

**Kuroo:** SO LIKE

**Kuroo:** Ahhh it’s so stupid

**Kuroo:** I’ve been feeling so weirdly insecure 

**Kuroo:** I feel so annoying all the time and I feel like everyone just hates me so much

**Kuroo:** And I’ve just been overthinking so much, especially about like all of my relationships. Like… You know how Kenma normally is with Akaashi and Hinata??? Like he seems so happy when he’s with him

**Kuroo:** But he’s usually so grumbly with me and like I love it

**Kuroo:** I think it’s so cute but like

**Kuroo:** What if he’s like that because I genuinely annoy him?

**Kuroo:** Like when he’ll just be like ‘ur annoying kuro’ or ‘ur so weird kuro’ does he actually mean it?

**Kuroo:** Like I feel horrible but what if he hates me?

**Kuroo:** What if he wants to break up with me???

**Kuroo:** AND AHH IDK I FEEL SO UGLY

**Kuroo:** BUT I FEEL LIKE I’M SECONDS AWAY FROM HAVING A BREAKDOWN ALL THE TIME

**Kuroo:** Like I’m always on the verge of tears lately

**Kuroo:** AND IDK WHY

**Sugawara:** Oh my god okay

**Sugawara:** First off, you’re not annoying. No one thinks that

**Sugawara:** And second, it’s okay to not be alright sometimes, Kuroo. Like, it’s alright that you’re feeling like that 

**Sugawara:** And if you’re upset over that, then just talk to Kenma

**Sugawara:** I know he doesn’t hate you. He loves you so much

**Sugawara:** Just talk to him if that’s something that’s bothering you

**Kuroo:** But that seems so scary. What if he thinks I’m stupid

**Kuroo:** Ahhh I’m being stupid I;’m being stupid it’s fine it’s fine

**Sugawara:** You’re not being stupid. Just talk to him!

**Kuroo:** No no no it’s fine it’s fine it’s fine

**Sugawara:** KUROO

**Kuroo:** SUGA I FEEL ANNOYING WITH EVERYONE

**Kuroo:** Oh god, do I annoy you????

**Sugawara:** NO????

**Sugawara:** I love you so much, idiot

**Sugawara:** Talk to Kenma tomorrow

**Kuroo:** Fine :-(

**Sugawara:** And call me in the morning

**Sugawara:** We haven’t facetimed in a week

**Sugawara:** And I miss your not stupid and not annoying face

**Kuroo:** Ugh

**Kuroo:** I love you Suga

**Kuroo:** I’m so happy Daichi brought you into my life.

**Sugawara:** I’m glad too 💝

**Sugawara:** And I love you more

**Sugawara:** Now go to sleep!!

**Kuroo:** Okayyy. Goodnight ❤️

**Sugawara:** Goodnight 💝

\--

**Kuroo** and  **Kenma**

**Kuroo** : I have something stupid to talk about

**Kenma:** Okay?

-

**Kuroo:** Hahaha

**Kuroo:** Actually. Nvm it’s fine

**Kenma:** ??

**Kenma:** Tetsurou, if you’re upset about something please just talk to me about it.

**Kenma:** You’ve been upset all week, I can tell. You’re being so quiet and you seem to be just off in your own world. 

**Kenma:** It’s sad to see you like that. You can talk to me about anything, you know that right?

**Kenma:** … Do you want to break up with me?

**Kuroo:** NO OMG

**Kenma:** OKAY OKAY BECAUSE I WAS ALREADY TEARING UP

**Kuroo** : I WOULD NEVER BREAK UP WITH YOU. I LOVE YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING

**Kenma:** WELL IDK. YOU’RE BEING SO DISTANT 

**Kuroo:** BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE YOU WANT TO BREAK UP WITH ME

**Kenma:** WHY WOULD I DO THAT

**Kenma:** I’VE NEVER MET ANYONE WHO MAKES ME AS HAPPY AS YOU DO

**Kuroo:** AHHH

**Kenma:** CALL ME, IDIOT

_ Incoming call from:  _ **Kuro Tetsu🖤😻**

\--

**Kenma** changed the group name to  _ KUROO TETSUROU IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE AND IF YOU EVEN BLINK AT HIM WRONG I’M ACTUALLY GOING TO HURT YOU BECAUSE HE’S SO HEART EYES LIKE I’VE NEVER MET ANYONE MORE HEART EYES IN MY LIFE AND I’M SO IN LOVE WITH HIM AND I WANT TO MARRY HIM AND KISS HIM EVERYDAY BECAUSE I LOVE WAKING UP NEXT TO HIM AND I LOVE LOOKING AT HIS CUTE FACE AND I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM I JUST WANT TO BE WITH HIM EVERY SECOND OF EVERYD _

**Daichi:** Everyd?

**Kenma:** I hit the character limit

**Kenma:** BUT I LOVE HIM

**Oikawa:** Yeah, we know

**Kenma:** NO YOU DON’T GET IT

**Kenma:** I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

**Hinata:** We do get it

**Kenma:** NOOO

**Kenma:** KURO

**Kenma:** KURO I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

**Kuroo:** Kenma lol

**Kuroo:** I love you too

**Kuroo:** BUT AHAH YOU’RE EMBARRASSING ME

**Kenma:** NOOO

**Yaku:** You get embarrassed? I didn’t know your brain was that complex 😍

**Kenma:** Yaku 🤬

**Yaku:** LMAO

**Yaku:** Kenma, bully Kuroo with me 😔

**Kenma:** NOOO

**Kuroo:** AHAHA KENMA YOU’RE BEING EMBARRASSING

**Kenma:** WELL

**Kenma:** I LOVE YOU

**Kuroo:** I LOVE YOU TOO BUT STOP 

**Kenma:** _ attached image _

**Kenma:** LOOK AT HIM

**Kenma:** He’s so cute

**Kenma:** He’s so embarrassed 

**Sugawara:** KENMA YOU’RE JUST LAYING ON HIM

**Sugawara:** EW EW EW

**Sugawara:** HE’S BURYING HIS FACE IN YOUR HAIR I’M GOING TO GO INSANE

**Kenma:** HE’S SO CUTE AND EMBARRASSED 

**Kenma:** Kurooooo Kuro Kuro Kuro you’re so cute

**Kuroo:** STOP

**Kenma:** Tetsurou Tetsurou Tetsurou

**Kenma:** Give me a kiss 🥺

**Kuroo:** You can just ask me out loud…

**Kenma:** No because i think it’s cute when you read the messages and smile 

**Kuroo:** I’m going to die

**Kuroo:** AHAHA I’M GOING TO DIE KENMA YOU’RE SO CUTE

**Oikawa:** I love this!! Kenma!! I never see you like this!!

**Kenma:** Well get used to it 😎 Because I’m going to be like this for the rest of forever 😎

**Sugawara:** YESS

**Tsukishima:** Noooo

-

**Kuroo** and  **Kenma:**

**Kuroo:** How long are you planning on being embarrassing in the groupchat?

**Kenma:** However long it takes to erase any doubt in your mind that I don’t feel endless love for you and only you 💘

**Kuroo:** You’re going to make me CRY KENMA I LOVE YOU

**Kenma:** I love you more!! Now come kiss me!! 😠🥺

-

**Hinata:** Kageyama has sneezed 30 times in the past 10 minutes

**Oikawa:** Okay???

**Sugawara:** OMG DID YOU TAKE A VIDEO??

**Oikawa:** Ew???

**Hinata:** YES BECAUSE HE’S CUTE

**Oikawa:** EW???

**Hinata:** _ attached video _

**Kageyama:** Stop omg

**Kageyama:** My nose piercing is making me sneeze

**Kuroo:** NOSE PIERCING

**Kuroo:** KAGEYAMA I FORGOT ABOUT THAT

**Kuroo:** SEND A PIC

**Kageyama:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** Ew

**Bokuto:** ARE YOU CRYING??

**Kageyama:** I’VE BEEN SNEEZING

**Tsukishima:** You look stupid

**Kageyama:** Coming from you

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA KAGEYAMA

**Sugawara:** Kageyama really said 🥺

**Kageyama:** I can barely open my eyes wtf

**Hinata:** Omg he’s sneezing again

**Oikawa:** Death by sneezes

**Oikawa:** Rip Tobio I guess 🥰 See you never 😘

**Iwaizumi:** TOORU STOP

\--

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** Look!! Kenma is being so cute!!

**Kuroo:** Literally the past week he’s just been sleeping on me like this

**Sugawara:** Okay like

**Sugawara:** THAT’S SO CUTE AND ALL BUT KUROO..

**Kuroo:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** DO YOU HAVE A BLACK EYE??

**Kuroo:** AHAHAHA

**Kenma:** AHHHH

**Kenma:** OOPS OOPS OOPS

**Iwaizumi:** OOPS OOPS????

**Iwaizumi:** WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM??

**Kenma:** THERE WAS OMG

**Kenma:** THERE WAS A BEETLE IN OUR BED

**Kenma:** IT WAS HUGE

**Kuroo:** Kenma’s afraid of bugs lol

**Kenma:** IT WAS SCARY??

**Kuroo:** anyways he freaked out and accidentally punched me 

**Sugawara:** HOW DO YOU JUST DO THAT

**Kenma:** IDK BUT I WAS SO SCARED 

**Kuroo:** I HAVE PICS OF HIM CRYING OVER IT LOL

**Kenma:** kuro 🥺😢

**Kuroo:** AHAHA KENMA STOP

**Sugawara:** You were crying over a beetle???

**Daichi:** Suga I’ve seen you cry over moths before

**Sugawara:** Um. Anyways

**Akaashi:** AHAHA KENMA YOU’RE SO STUPID

**Kenma:** ????IT WAS HUGE AND SCARY

**Kenma:** AHHH I FEEL BAD KURO COME BACK TO BED SO I CAN KISS YOUR FACE

**Kuroo:** AHHH OKAY OKAY


	106. Idk how i wrote this but i did and its whatever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: Oh no oh no
> 
> Daichi: ???
> 
> Sugawara: Oh no oh no
> 
> Kageyama: ????
> 
> Sugawara: Oh no oh no
> 
> Akaashi: ????
> 
> Sugawara: oh no

_ KUROO TETSUROU IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE AND IF YOU EVEN BLINK AT HIM WRONG I’M ACTUALLY GOING TO HURT YOU BECAUSE HE’S SO HEART EYES LIKE I’VE NEVER MET ANYONE MORE HEART EYES IN MY LIFE AND I’M SO IN LOVE WITH HIM AND I WANT TO MARRY HIM AND KISS HIM EVERYDAY BECAUSE I LOVE WAKING UP NEXT TO HIM AND I LOVE LOOKING AT HIS CUTE FACE AND I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM I JUST WANT TO BE WITH HIM EVERY SECOND OF EVERYD _

**Tsukishima:** I would just like to say

**Tsukishima:** I’m having the best day ever

**Kageyama:** Lol

**Kageyama:** I’m glad you’re having fun! :-)

**Tsukishima:** _ Attached Image _

**Tsukishima:** _ Attached Image _

**Tsukishima:** He looks so cute

**Tsukishima:** I’ll take you out to drink as thanks for telling me about this place

**Kageyama:** Don’t worry about it lol I’m just glad you’re both having fun 

**Kageyama:** I thought it was perfect for Yamaguchi

**Sugawara:** EXCUSE ME

**Sugawara:** YAMAGUCHI WITH SUNFLOWERS

**Sugawara:** YAMAGUCHI IN A FIELD OF SUNFLOWERS 

**Sugawara:** IM GONNA 🥺🥰

**Sugawara:** BUT I’M ALSO GONNA SHIT OUT VOMIT BECAUSE HE LOOKS SO CUTE

**Tsukishima:** oops I thought this was just me and Tobio

**Tsukishima:** Oh well

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi is cute so it’s fine

**Kenma:** I think I’M GONNA MURDER YOU SO I CAN DATE YAMAGUCHI

**Tsukishima:** You’re like

**Tsukishima:** tiny

**Tsukishima:** good luck I guess

**Oikawa:** I’M GOING CRAZY HE’S SO CUTE AHHHH

**Daichi:** Enjoy your date 😊

**Tsukishima:** Thanks

-

**Yamaguchi:** guys guys Tsukki took me on the best date ever!

**Hinata:** Awww

**Lev:** The pictures looked so cute!!

**Tsukishima:** they did

**Yamaguchi:** I was so happy omg omg

**Sugawara:** CUTE SO CUTE 

**Yamaguchi:** How do you even know about that place, Kageyama?

**Kageyama:** Me and Shouyou were out and we drove by it. We were gonna stop but he’s scared of bees so I didn’t want to bring him to a flower farm lol

**Hinata:** I’M NOT SCARED OF BEES

**Kageyama:** you are

**Hinata:** IM NOT 

**Oikawa:** Hinata’s scared of bees lmaoooo

**Hinata:** THEY’RE SO SCARY LIKE FOR SOME REASON THEY ALWAYS LAND ON ME

**Kageyama:** I thought you said you weren’t scared dumbass

**Hinata:** I’m NOT!

**Yamaguchi:** it’s okay lol 

**Kageyama:** I wasn’t making fun of you

**Hinata:** BUT OIKAWA IS

**Kageyama:** Who cares about what Oikawa says

**Kageyama:** I don’t listen to him

**Oikawa:** TOBIO WOW

-

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ I’m Rising Above  _ 💆🏻‍♀️

**Iwaizumi:** lmao yay

**Bokuto:** What do you mean?

**Oikawa:** I finally blocked my old roommate on everything 🥰

**Asahi:** oh no, what happened?

**Oikawa:** he just made me miserable 

**Oikawa:** Like I’ve never hated anyone but he changed that teehee

**Iwaizumi:** I feel horrible whenever you talk about it

**Iwaizumi:** like I didn’t realize you were having that bad of a time

**Oikawa:** It’s fine Iwa-chan because I’m rising above

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up lol

**Bokuto:** Wait wait but like why??

**Oikawa:** Well for starters his dad threw shade at me for not bringing a tv to the dorm? Even though they knew I wasn’t bringing a tv? And he did it in person and to himself right in front of me when it was just us in the room?

**Oikawa:** And I was always out of the dorm cause I’d go to Iwa-chan’s or makki and mattun’s and apparently that was a problem for him. But like why would I want to stay in a room where I get my ear talked off about the same event in his life

**Oikawa:** And also he was so ✨fucking messy✨ 

**Oikawa:** I think he was bitter because I had friends already and never included him when I’d go out.

**Oikawa:** But you aren’t gonna get anywhere in life if friends are just handed to you idk maybe it’s bitchy of me

**Oikawa:** But if you don’t go out and try to make your own friends, I’m not gonna let you use mine as a plan b

**Oikawa:** I’m not the nicest person but I have a good group of people around me and I really think there's someone for everybody but I’m not gonna hold your hand through it

**Oikawa:** Baby boy, we’re just roommates and we’re adults so uhh figure it out i guess

**Oikawa:** I think the last straw was when he went out with me and everyone and used Iwa-chan’s money 🥰 Like we went out to eat and he invited himself and didn’t have money so Hajime offered to pay and he did not hold back when ordering.

**Oikawa:** And then there was a bunch of small stuff that happened towards the end of the year and I was just miserable and depressed but I’m living with Iwa-chan now so it’s so much better 

**Oikawa:** I just got annoyed when he would send me things on every platform like we were friends and like he didn’t ruin a whole school year for me so I blocked him oops

**Bokuto:** That’s awful 😟

**Oikawa:** Yeah but it’s fine now!

**Bokuto:** YAY

**Oikawa:** YAY

-

  
  


**Sugawara:** Oh no oh no

**Daichi:** ???

**Sugawara:** Oh no oh no

**Kageyama:** ????

**Sugawara:** Oh no oh no

**Akaashi:** ????

**Sugawara:** oh no

**Sugawara:** What if I’m using Daichi as a coping mechanism

**Sugawara:** Oh no oh no what if I’m using him as a coping mechanism because he calls me pretty and pays attention to me and loves me so I just use that to my advantage

**Sugawara:** What if Daichi never experiences love because he’s stuck here with me

**Sugawara:** What if he just feels bad for me so he stays with me and when I die he’s so happy because he can just move on

**Sugawara:** Oh no what if he gets annoyed and leaves me and I’m here and alone without my daichi because he has always hated me 

**Daichi:** Okay so first

**Daichi:** baby calm down

**Daichi:** So I guess I’ll start with the fact that I love you so much. I’ve never really loved anyone as much as I love you

**Daichi:** No offense Kuroo

**Daichi:** And I have no plans of breaking up with you

**Daichi:** if anything, I have plans of marrying you Suga

**Daichi:** For the coping mechanism thing

**Daichi:** If you’re concerned about it then you probably aren’t using me

**Daichi:** But I’m so in love with you that I wouldn’t mind if you did

**Daichi:** As long as I make you happy and get to spend my days with you like we’ve been doing

**Daichi:** It’s all worth it!

**Sugawara:** Daichi 🥺

**Sugawara:** WAIT DAICHI NO YOU IDIOT YOU’RE WORTH SO MUCH MORE DON’T SETTLE FOR BEING A COPING MECHANISM BECAUSE YOU DESERVE A TRUE AND HONEST LOVE

**Sugawara:** 😡😡

**Daichi:** Well I mean if that’s the only way I can be with you then it’s fine

**Sugawara:** 😡😡

**Daichi:** I mean it, Suga. It’s either you or no one

**Sugawara:** WELL GOOD THING I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU 

**Daichi:** That is a good thing 

**Kuroo:** Okay wow this was so scary yet so cute

**Kuroo:** And Daichi, I’m offended 🤬😭

**Kuroo:** I’m not actually

**Kuroo:** Or am I???

**Kenma:** You’re ruining their moment Kuro

**Sugawara:** Daichi daichi come over

**Daichi:** okay lol

-

**Atsumu** added  **Osamu** to the group

**Atsumu:** _ Attached Image _

**Atsumu:** look how cute Kita is

**Osamu:** Did you add me just to flaunt your romance

**Atsumu:** Maybe

**Osamu:** i hate you

**Osamu:** Kageyama date me

**Osamu:** Actually don’t because you dated my brother and that’d be weird

**Osamu:** I can’t date Hajime because that would be double dipping

**Oikawa:** AND HE HAS A BOYFRIEND  (・`ω´・)

**Oikawa:** WE ALL HAVE BOYFRIENDS GO SOMEWHERE ELSE

**Osamu:** Tanaka doesn’t

**Tanaka:** He’s right 😈

**Kiyoko:** ???

**Osamu:** JOKING JOKING I PROMISE I'M NOT A HOME WRECKER

**Oikawa:** He says as he comes in here looking for a boyfriend

**Osamu:** Ooh ooh

**Osamu:** Akaashi Keiji!

**Akaashi:** yes?

**Osamu:** Date me

**Bokuto:** no

**Osamu:** Well why not

**Atsumu:** Because you didn’t say please

**Osamu:** Ohhh

**Osamu:** Akaashi Keiji!

**Akaashi:** Yes?

**Osamu:** Date me please

**Akaashi:** I’m sorry, I have a boyfriend

**Osamu:** Okay but we’d look great together

**Akaashi:** Okay but I love my boyfriend

**Osamu:** Damn 😓

**Atsumu:** Okay hear me out bro

**Atsumu:** brother

**Atsumu:** broski

**Atsumu:** brother from the same mother and father

**Atsumu:** brother from literally the same egg but we just split

**Osamu:** I’m listening

**Atsumu:** Keep that energy, right?

**Osamu:** right

**Atsumu:** but project it on Suna

**Atsumu:** The guy you like

**Osamu:** It’s different though

**Osamu:** Suna makes me nervous

**Atsumu:** Okay so

**Atsumu:** Don’t be nervous

**Osamu:** damn you’re right

**Osamu:** Akaashi, I’ll be back for you

**Bokuto:** DON’T BE

**Akaashi:** You don’t have to

**-**

**Osamu:** Okay I come bearing an update

**Osamu:** I got nervous again

**Osamu:** I bought him coffee

**Osamu:** And then dropped it

**Osamu:** He laughed though

**Osamu:** I bought him lunch

**Osamu:** And then dropped it

**Osamu:** He laughed

**Osamu:** We’re on the train and he fell asleep so he’s leaning on my shoulder

**Kageyama:** Was it a date?

**Osamu:** Nope ☺️

**Akaashi:** Osamu are you okay?

**Osamu:** Yes

**Atsumu:** no


	107. Literally nothing this is nothing and this means nothing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iwaizumi: lol
> 
> Sugawara: WHY DID YOU DO THAT OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH WTF YOURE DEAD TO ME

_ I’m Rising Above  _ 💆🏻‍♀️

**Oikawa:** I have to pay my credit card omgomg

**Oikawa:** i forgot!!!

**Sugawara:** Are you late?

**Oikawa:** No no i have to pay in a few days

**Sugawara:** Oh god is it a lot????

**Oikawa:** $34

**Oikawa:** WHY DID I SPEND SO MUCH LAST MONTH

**Sugawara:** ?????

**Kuroo:** I thought you were gonna say like $200 or something geez

**Oikawa:** I was gonna buy something else too but now that I have to pay that much I don’t want to

**Sugawara:** We can split your bill!

**Oikawa:** NO WHY ITS JUST $34 SUGA

**Sugawara:** lol okay

**Kuroo:** Is it a lot of money to you or not???

**Oikawa:** No but yeah

**Sugawara:** Like you have enough but you don’t want to spend

**Oikawa:** exactly

**Kuroo:** ooohh

**Kuroo:** For some reason I never thought you’d be like

**Kuroo:** A saver?

**Oikawa:** ???

**Kuroo:** You give off rich kid vibes

**Oikawa:** You’re literally from Tokyo

**Kuroo:** lmaooooo

**Iwaizumi:** He almost cried when he bought a shirt he’s been wanting for months now

**Oikawa:** I hate spending money but I love it ughhhh

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  _ rich boy tingz💴💴 _

**Iwaizumi:** What did you want to buy anyways?

**Oikawa:** Hair clips!!!

**Oikawa:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** POM POM PURIN HAIR CLIPS AHHH SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** Omg don’t tell me they have My Melody ones because I will NEED THEM

**Oikawa:** _ Attached Image _

**Oikawa:** THEY DO

**Sugawara:** AHHHH

**Iwaizumi:** lol those are cute

**Iwaizumi:** I just bought them for you oikawa

**Iwaizumi:** Suga, if you get a package in the mail with the My Melody ones no you didn’t

**Sugawara:** IWAIZUMI HAJIME

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN THANK YOU

**Iwaizumi:** lol

**Sugawara:** WHY DID YOU DO THAT OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH WTF YOURE DEAD TO ME

**Iwaizumi:** lol it’s just something small

**Oikawa:** SUGA SUGA SEND ME SELFIES WHEN YOU WEAR THEM

**Sugawara:** I WAS GONNA TELL YOU TO DO THE SAME THING AHAH

**Daichi:** Aw this is so cute

**Kiyoko:** It is but don’t you think it’s dangerous?

**Daichi:** ???

**Iwaizumi:** ?

**Kiyoko:** Oikawa and Suga

**Kiyoko:** Being friends

**Kiyoko:** They sound like they’d be scary together

**Daichi: …**

**Iwaizumi:** Omg no

**Sugawara:** No no no its fine!!

**Oikawa:** Besties we’re besties! No chaos at all

**Sugawara:** 😊

**Oikawa:** 😊

**-**

**Kageyama** added  **Sakusa Kiyoomi** to the group

**Oikawa:** How do you just know all of these people??

**Kageyama:** Training camp!

**Akaashi:** Oh my

**Sakusa:** Akaashi

**Bokuto:** 😡

**Sakusa:** How are you Akaashi?

**Akaashi:** I’m good

**Sakusa:** That’s good to hear

**Sakusa:** Are you eating enough recently?

**Sakusa:** You’re looking thinner

**Akaashi:** I am

**Bokuto:** HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE

**Sakusa:** I just want to make sure you’re staying healthy

**Bokuto:** THAT’S NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY

**Sakusa:** Not thin in a bad way. You’re pretty like always

**Akaashi:** thank you I guess

**Bokuto:** WHY ARE YOU IGNORING ME

**Sakusa:** What

**Bokuto:** WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT

**Bokuto:** YOU CANT JUST COME IN HERE AND FLIRT WITH AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** It wasn’t flirting Bokuto, he was just asking how I was

**Bokuto:** HE SAID YOU GOT THINNER HOW DOES HE KNOW THAT DO YOU GUYS HANG OUT OR SOMETHING

**Akaashi:** No but we have each other on instagram and stuff so maybe he noticed

**Bokuto:** HE CALLED YOU PRETTY

**Akaashi:** ?

**Akaashi:** Oh I didn’t notice lol

**Akaashi:** Well

**Akaashi:** That’s very sweet Sakusa, thank you

**Bokuto:** DONT THANK HIM AKAASHI NO ARE YOU GONNA BE HIS BOYFRIEND NOW

**Akaashi:** I mean, Sakusa is handsome

**Bokuto** left the group

**Akaashi** added  **Bokuto** to the group

**Akaashi:** I’m just joking Bokuto

**Akaashi:** Maybe I joked too much

**Kuroo:** BOKUTO, BRO PLEASE ANSWER

**Bokuto** left the group

**Kenma:** omg Akaashi he’s sitting next to me why would you do this

**Akaashi:** I’ll fix it 

**Kenma:** He’s so sad omg do I hug him??? Please say no

**Kuroo:** FIX HIM HE LOOKS SO EMPTY AKAASHI HE’S NOT EVEN TALKING TO ME HE’S NOT HUGGING ME BACK

**Kenma** added  **Bokuto** to the group

**Akaashi:** Koutarou

**Akaashi:** I was just joking

**Akaashi:** I’m sorry. I just wanted to tease you a little

**Akaashi:** You’re so cute when you’re jealous so that’s all I wanted

**Akaashi:** I love you

**Akaashi:** well since you aren’t going to reply I’ll go get someone else to say it back to me

**Akaashi:** Sakusa

**Bokuto:** no stop

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI I LOVE YOU SO MUCH ARE YOU COMING TO KUROO AND KENMA’S PLACE SOON

**Akaashi:** i am

**Bokuto:** YAY OKAY

**Kenma:** oh thank goodness

**Sakusa:** I have to go. I’ll talk to you later Kageyama

**Kageyama:** Bye!

**Sakusa:** Bye Akaashi

**Bokuto:** 😡

**Bokuto** removed  **Sakusa**

**Akaashi:** lol

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI I’LL SEE YOU WHEN YOU GET HERE 💗

**Akaashi:** 💗

**Osamu:** Akaashi Keiji I’m here baby boy 😍😍😍

**Bokuto:** NO

-

**Kuroo:** So I was inspired by Sakusa being here

**Kuroo** added  **Terushima Yuji** to the group

**Kenma:** Kuro what is your problem

**Terushima:** Omg Oikawa is here

**Terushima:** Tooru hiiii 💕

**Terushima:** What are you doing rn?

**Oikawa:** I’m with Iwa-chan

**Oikawa:** Like always

**Terushima:** Aw lameeee. Why??

**Oikawa:** cause he’s my boyfriend

**Terushima:** You should be with me right now

**Iwaizumi:** He really shouldn’t

**Terushima:** Wait omg Kiyoko!!!

**Tanaka:** ????

**Kiyoko:** No

**Terushima:** We still have to go on our date!

**Kiyoko:** We never planned one

**Terushima:** So let's plan one right now

**Kiyoko:** Lets not

**Terushima:** Why not

**Tanaka:** HEY MAN WHAT THE HELL SHE’S MY GIRLFRIEND

**Sugawara** removed  **Terushima**

**Sugawara:** 🙃

**Kuroo:** 😕

**Sugawara:** ☺️🔪

**Kuroo:** 🙀

**Kuroo:** 🥺😿

**Sugawara:** 🤨

**Sugawara:** ☺️

**Kuroo:** 🤗

**Sugawara:** 🤗

**Kenma:** Why are you guys communicating through emojis 

**Kuroo:** 😿

**Sugawara:** 🥺

**Kenma:** 😺

**Sugawara:** ☺️

**Kuroo:** ☺️💘

**Kenma:** 💘

**Kenma:** 🤗

**Sugawara:** 🤗

**Kuroo:** 🤗🥺

**Sugawara:** 😊

**Oikawa:** This looks so ugly please stop

-

**Kenma:** Kuro Kuro Kuro I want something

**Kuroo:** What is it? I can pick it up on my way home

**Kenma:** Attention!

**Kenma:** I want attention!! (ó﹏ò｡)

**Kuroo:** I’ll be home in an hour!

**Kenma:** But I want attention now!!!

**Kuroo:** Akaashi, can you stop by the house? 

**Akaashi:** Yes

**Kenma:** Akaashi heart eyes yay

**Akaashi:** Kenma heart eyes yay

-

**Akaashi:** I’m stuck

**Akaashi:** Bokuto and I went to visit Kenma

**Akaashi:** And the three of us took a nap on the couch and I just woke up

**Akaashi:** I have Bokuto hugging me from the back, kenma leaning against my chest and Kuroo is next to him squishing us all together

**Akaashi:** I’m the only one awake help

**Kageyama:** It’s so late. Wake Bokuto up

**Akaashi:** He’s so comfy though

**Kageyama:** Wake Kenma up?

**Akaashi:** He looks way too cute

**Kageyama:** Kuroo then?

**Akaashi:** He just got off of work so he’s probably so tired

**Kageyama:** You can just wake them up to move to the room or something?

**Akaashi:** Good idea

**Akaashi:** Kuroo looks kinda uncomfortable

**Akaashi:** Okay I guess I’m carrying Kenma to their room lol

**Kageyama:** Aw

**Akaashi:** He’s not letting go of me so I guess I’m spending the night lmao

**Bokuto:** Yayyyy

**Akaashi:** There’s not enough room for four people on this bed

**Kuroo:** We’ll make it work lol

**Bokuto:** Akaashiiii let go of Kenma and cuddle me

**Akaashi:** Okay lol

**Kageyama:** goodnight guys! :-)

**Akaashi:** Goodnight!!

**Bokuto:** GOODNIGHT!!


	108. when i've been so sad recently but it's fine i'm rising above it today

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lev: Kenma usually falls asleep on me
> 
> Kuroo: NOT FAIR???!?!?!
> 
> Lev: HE FALLS ASLEEP ON YOU EVERY NIGHT CALM DOWN

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ I’m Dramatic _

**Iwaizumi:** You’re not

**Sugawara:** No you’re not

**Daichi:** What

**Kenma:** You’re not

**Hinata:** Why? Ur not

**Kuroo:** Why do you say that?

**Oikawa:** OMG SO LIKE

**Oikawa:** Idk I’m going through it recently for no reason :-(

**Oikawa:** And I was facetiming Sugawara because I always do

**Oikawa:** AND I HAD TO HANG UP BECAUSE I ALMOST STARTED CRYING ???

**Oikawa:** Like what calm down

**Sugawara:** THAT’S WHY YOU HUNG UP??

**Oikawa:** YES BUT IT’S FINE

**Sugawara:** IT’S NOT??

**Oikawa:** It is actually because that was yesterday and I cried until I fell asleep but when I woke up, Iwa-chan was finally home and he was sleeping on me like a cutie ☺️

**Oikawa:** And I feel so much better so I am now rising above ☺️

**Kageyama:** I don’t think any of that makes you dramatic

**Oikawa:** WHAT DO YOU MEAN TOBIO IT TOTALLY DOES

**Kageyama:** Not really? Having emotions and bad days/weeks doesn’t make you dramatic 

**Oikawa:** Stop sounding smarter than me wtf 🤬

**Iwaizumi:** Omg Tooru

**Iwaizumi:** Hurry up and get dressed please

**Sugawara:** He said please 🥺🥺🥺

**Oikawa:** Why?

**Iwaizumi:** I’m taking you out to breakfast

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN WHY 🥺🥺

**Oikawa:** I DON’T DESERVE THAT 🥺🥺

**Iwaizumi:** Yes you do, idiot, you deserve the world

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHANNN 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

**Iwaizumi:** Hurry up!!

**Oikawa:** OKAY!!

**Asahi:** The only plans in the groupchat I want to see 😍

**Nishinoya:** YES YES YES IWAIZUMI IS SO HEART EYES

**Daichi:** Iwaizumi 😍

**Kuroo:** IWA-CHAN 🥵🥵

**Oikawa:** KUROO DON’T CALL HIM THAT WTF

**Kuroo:** IWA-CHAN IWA-CHAN IWA-CHAN 🥵🥵😍😍

**Oikawa:** NO STOP

**Iwaizumi:** Omg IDIOT STOP GETTING DISTRACTED

**Iwaizumi:** Finish getting dressed so we can leave

**Oikawa:** Noooooo 🥺

**Oikawa:** Iwa-channnn come do it for meeee 🥺🥺

**Iwaizumi:** Omg

**Sugawara:** When Iwaizumi doesn’t know how to say no to Oikawa 😋

**Iwaizumi:** I never said yes wtf??

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** And yet here you are

**Iwaizumi:** I hate you

**Oikawa:** ❤️

**Iwaizumi:** ❤️

**Sugawara:** Stop being cute in front of me and forcing me to shit on all of my things

**Daichi:** Koushi omfg

**Kenma:** SUGA HAHA

\--

**Lev:** GUYS

**Lev:** GUYS GUYS UPDATE

**Lev:** I MOVED OUT OF MY DORM TODAY

**Oikawa:** YAY

**Atsumu:** YAY!!

**Yaku:** Yes!! I’m so happy for you!!

**Lev:** Yes!!

**Lev:** I couldn’t end my housing contract early, so I just transferred rooms 

**Lev:** BUT I MOVED IN WITH SHIBAYAMA

**Kuroo:** OH YAY!!

**Kuroo:** He was literally just talking to me about how he wanted a roommate

**Lev:** YEAH!! HE TOLD ME ABOUT IT WHEN I WAS HANGING OUT WITH HIM AND KENMA AFTER PRACTICE

**Kuroo:** You guys hang out??? Wtf when??

**Yaku:** After practice, can’t you read? 😍

**Kuroo:** Yaku 🤬

**Kenma:** When you and Yaku don’t want to fucking go home because you won’t stop practicing like freak idiots 😍

**Kenma:** Usually Lev and Shibayama stay with me

**Lev:** Kenma usually falls asleep on me

**Kuroo:** NOT FAIR???!?!?!

**Lev:** HE FALLS ASLEEP ON YOU EVERY NIGHT CALM DOWN

**Kuroo: 😡😡😡😡**

**Kenma:** Why are you so dramatic

**Kenma:** Anyways

**Kenma:** Lev if you need help moving, let me know! Kuro is strong and I can force him to help u ❤️

**Kuroo:** UM?

**Kenma:** Yes?

**Kuroo:** Nvm nvm 

**Oikawa:** When Kuroo doesn’t have a backbone when it comes to Kenma 😍

**Kuroo:** I do when it matters 😍🥵

**Asahi:** What a scary sentence 😍

**Kuroo: 😍🥵**

**Kenma: 🍑👋🥵**

**Lev: 😳😳**

**Yaku: 😳😳😳**

**Tsukishima:** I hate all of you

\--

**Yaku** added **Nobuyuki Kai, Taketora Yamamoto, Shouhei Fukunaga, Sou Inuoka, Tamahiko Teshiro,** and  **Yuki Shibayama** to the chat

**Kuroo:** Oh it’s my team

**Oikawa:** Yaku why is Nekoma here

**Yaku:** I’VE HAD ENOUGH

**Yaku:** OKAY 

**Yaku:** We’re playing a game, everybody, fingers up  **✋**

**Kuroo: ✋**

**Kenma: ✋**

**Yamamoto: ✋**

**Fukunaga: ✋**

**Inuoka: ✋**

**Teshiro: ✋**

**Shibayama: ✋**

**Lev: ✋**

**Nobuyuki: ✋**

**Oikawa: ✋**

**Yaku:** Sorry Oikawa this is a Nekoma-only event

**Oikawa:** ☹️

**Yaku:** Anyways

**Yaku:** Put a finger down if you’re literally so tired of Kenma and Kuroo being Like That

**Kuroo:** HUH

**Kuroo:** LIKE WHAT

**Kenma:** HAHAHA

**Fukunaga: ✋** -1 

**Fukunaga:** There’s no four finger emoji 😡

**Nobuyuki: ✋** -1

**Nobuyuki:** Put a finger down if you’ve just been minding your own business in the gym and turned around to see them kissing in some fucking corner

**Nobuyuki:** 🤟

**Yamamoto: ✋** -1

**Fukunaga:** 🤟

**Inuoka: ✋** -1

**Teshiro: ✋** -1

**Shibayama: ✋** -1

**Lev: ✋** -1

**Kuroo:** This feels a little unfair...

**Yamamoto:** Put a finger down if you’ve walked into a storage room or the club room to grab something and found them making out 

**Yamamoto: 🤟**

**Yaku:** 🤚-1

**Lev:** 🤟

**Inuoka:** Put another finger down if that’s happened to you and one of them has their hands down the other person’s pants

**Inuoka: ✌️**

**Yamamoto: ✌️**

**Teshiro: ✌️**

**Shibayama: ✌️**

**Kuroo:** THIS FEELS UNFAIR

**Kenma:** Tetsurou I’m embarrassed  (⌒_⌒;)

**Atsumu:** Inuoka lolololol

**Kenma:** ATSUMU DON’T

**Fukunaga:** Put a finger down if you’ve ever been trying to mind your business and talk to your captain or setter about something in the middle of practice only to figure out that they’re not paying attention to you because they’re making heart eyes at each other

**Fukunaga: ✌️**

**Lev: ✌️**

**Yaku: 🤟**

**Shibayama: 👆**

**Daichi:** Oh wow

**Daichi:** Kuroo you’re so unprofessional

**Oikawa:** LITERALLY

**Kunimi:** Oikawa you have no room to talk here

**Oikawa: 😳😳**

**Iwaizumi:** Oh god

**Akaashi:** I want to laugh at you guys

**Akaashi:** But I know me and Bokuto are the same

**Sugawara:** ARE DAICHI AND I THE ONLY PROFESSIONAL ONES OUT HERE??

**Kuroo:** I’M PROFESSIONAL WTF

**Kuroo:** THIS IS SLANDER 

**Lev:** Put a finger down if, while we’re in the stands watching another game, you’ve seen Kenma sitting on Kuroo’s lap 

**Akaashi: 🤚** -1

**Yamamoto: ✊**

**Fukunaga: 👆**

**Inuoka: 👆**

**Hinata: 🤚** -1

**Teshiro: 👆**

**Shibayama: ✊**

**Lev: 👆**

**Nobuyuki: ✌️**

**Kenma:** AKAASHI AND SHOUYOU HOW COULD YOU

**Kuroo:** THAT ONE ISN’T FAIR

**Kuroo:** IT’S NOT DURING PRACTICE AND HE’S JUST COMFORTABLE

**Kenma:** Tetsurou I’M SO EMBARRASSED I’M QUITTING 

**Kenma:** YOU GUYS JUST WANT ME TO QUIT THE TEAM

**Yaku:** Wow. Look at that. All of us have so many fingers down 

**Yaku:** Don’t you think this is an issue, captain?

**Atsumu:** Is this some kind of intervention?

**Nobuyuki:** Yes

**Osamu:** Nice

**Kuroo:** I think you’re all mean 😡

**Kuroo:** You’re bullies 😡

**Kuroo:** But like

**Kuroo:** Maybe during practice… It’s a little unnecessary to be so touchy

**Yamamoto:** A LITTLE??

**Yamamoto:** Also hi Kiyoko

**Kiyoko:** Omg hi

**Kuroo:** SHUT UP SHUT UP I HATE ALL OF YOU

**Yaku:** We hate you more 😘

**Yaku** removed **Nobuyuki Kai, Taketora Yamamoto, Shouhei Fukunaga, Sou Inuoka, Tamahiko Teshiro,** and  **Yuki Shibayama** from the chat

**Sugawara:** Damn, Yaku you didn’t come to play

**Yaku:** :)

**Kuroo:** Excuse me Yaku

**Kuroo:** In this chat we add noses to our smiley faces

**Yaku:** Get fucked Kuroo

**Kuroo:** SO RUDE

\--

**Kiyoko:** Asahi, I’m leaving Tanaka’s in a few minutes

**Asahi:** Okay! I’ll be there soon!

**Daichi:** ?

**Sugawara:** ?

**Oikawa:** ??

**Nishinoya:** Asahi while you’re out can you get me coffee?  (─‿‿─)♡

**Asahi:** No

**Nishinoya:** (っ˘̩╭╮˘̩)っ

**Asahi:** It’s 1am, Yuu

**Nishinoya:** o(TヘTo)

**Oikawa:** Why are you meeting up with Kiyoko at 1am???

**Oikawa:** AND WHY DO NOYA AND TANAKA NOT CARE?

**Kiyoko:** Oops, I didn’t realize this was the groupchat

**Kiyoko:** Asahi walks me home

**Kiyoko:** Campus is really scary at night

**Daichi:** Tanaka why don’t you walk her home wtf

**Tanaka:** SHE WON’T LET ME???

**Kiyoko:** Because if you walk me home you won’t want to leave ❤️

**Tanaka:** It’s because I love you ❤️

**Kiyoko:** I know, I love you too ❤️

**Kiyoko:** But I need sleep.

**Asahi:** Kiyoko!! I’m almost there!

**Kenma:** Asahi that’s so cute

**Kenma:** Kuro always walks me home even though he doesn’t have to

**Kuroo:** The one time I didn’t someone followed you???

**Kenma:** That was once 

**Kuroo:** ??STILL???

**Asahi:** Yeah! That’s so scary. I don’t want that happening to our Kiyoko 😟

**Kiyoko:** Asahi you’re so cute!

**Asahi:** No you are!

**Sugawara:** Your friendship omg

**Sugawara:** AHHH YOUR FRIENDSHIP

**Sugawara:** IT’S SO CUTE I’M GOING TO DIE

**Kiyoko:** Sugawara calm down!!

**Sugawara:** NO NO NO

**Sugawara:** YOU GUYS ARE JUST SO CLOSE IT’S SO CUTE

**Asahi:** She’s my best friend!!!

**Sugawara:** THAT’S IT I’M GOING TO DIE

**Kiyoko:** SUGAWARA LOL CALM DOWN

**Sugawara:** NEVER


	109. When you said I’m the roommate in heat and I haven’t stopped laughing yet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: BABY I DIDN'T MEAN IT
> 
> Kageyama: 💔💔
> 
> Hinata: WTF DON'T CALL HIM BABY!!!

_ I’m Dramatic _

**Asahi:** I just remembered that grandparents exist???

**Nishinoya:** You love my grandpa!

**Asahi:** yeah but like idk my grandma texted me and I was like ????

**Asahi:** And then I remembered who she was

**Daichi:** That’s so weird

**Daichi:** Why did she text you

**Asahi:** Idk probably some sibling drama but I don’t wanna ask because then I’ll be involved and like she’ll just talk to me forever lol

**Nishinoya:** 😠

**Kuroo:** Are you not close to your grandparents

**Asahi:** Oh not at all lmao

**Asahi:** I barely talk to them

**Iwaizumi:** that’s kind of sad

**Nishinoya:** Not really. I mean he can’t miss something he’s never had

**Daichi:** That’s mean, Noya

**Asahi:** Don’t worry lol

**Asahi:** That’s what I tell him all the time

**Asahi:** He feels bad for me whenever my grandparents talk to me cause like it’s so random and only when they feel like it

**Asahi:** But there's no need to be sad over it

**Asahi:** It’s frustrating but oh well

**Asahi:** I just thought it was funny because some girl was talking about her weekend with her grandparents and how fun it was

**Asahi:** And then she asked me about my grandparents and I was like

**Asahi:** ???? oh we don’t talk

**Asahi:** she felt bad but I told her it was fine

**Nishinoya:** You just talk to girls when I’m not around???!!!

**Asahi:** I mean, it’s a small class so we all know each other

**Nishinoya:** It’s fine Asahi

**Nishinoya:** Go ahead and say it

**Nishinoya:** Just rip my heart out and throw it to the ground

**Asahi:** What are you talking about

**Nishinoya:** If you like her better it’s fine. Just tell me so I don’t waste your time

**Asahi:** She’s just a classmate

**Nishinoya:** you should be talking to me instead

**Asahi:** I was in class

**Nishinoya:** TALK TO ME IN CLASS

**Tanaka:** NOYA HAHAH WHAT

**Daichi:** What is this conversation even about anymore

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI DOESN’T LOVE ME ANYMORE YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST

**Asahi:** I never said that

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI NEVER LOVED ME YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST

**Asahi:** Yuu, stop that

**Asahi:** That’s not true

**Nishinoya:** If it weren’t true you’d be here right now 😭 hugging me and kissing me

**Asahi:** Omg

**Asahi:** Next time can you just ask me to come over instead of freaking me out

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI THINKS IM A FREAK AND HATES EVEN THE THOUGHT OF ME

**Asahi:** lmao im on my way ❤️

**Nishinoya:** ❤️

**Daichi:** what just happened

**Kiyoko:** They’re perfect for each other🥺

**Nishinoya:** 🥺

**Tanaka:** 🥺

**Asahi:** 🥺

**Kuroo:** I’m in love with every single person on your team Daichi

**Daichi:** Not Suga

**Kuroo:** ESPECIALLY SUGA

**Kageyama:** :-(((

**Kuroo:** NO KAGEYAMA

**Kageyama:** :-(((

**Kuroo:** BABY I DIDN'T MEAN IT

**Kageyama:** 💔💔

**Hinata:** WTF DON'T CALL HIM BABY!!!

**-**

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA JUST DID SOMETHING HORRIBLE

**Tsukishima:** omg I doubt it was bad

**Hinata:** CAN YOU READ??? I DIDN'T SAY IT WAS BAD I SAID IT WAS HORRIBLE

**Kageyama:** Shou, stop

**Hinata:** I CANT BELIEVE YOU I WANT TO CRY

**Kageyama:** DONT CRY 

**Kenma:** What’s happening?!??

**Kenma:** Shouyou are you alright??????

**Hinata:** HE JUST TOLD NATSU HE’S GONNA MARRY HER WHEN SHE'S OLDER

**Akaashi:** awww

**Hinata:** NO NOT AW

**Kageyama:** THATS NOT EVEN WHAT I SAID, STUPID

**Hinata:** THEN WHAT DID YOU SAY, IDIOT

**Kageyama:** I told her that if she doesn’t love anyone else and if something happens to me and you, I’d marry her

**Hinata:** WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT

**Kageyama:** she was sad

**Hinata:** SAD THAT YOU WONT DATE HER

**Hinata:** NOW SHES LOOKING AT WEDDING DRESSES AND COLORS THAT WOULD LOOK GOOD ON YOU

**Hinata:** SHE THINKS YOURE GONNA LOOK GOOD IN YELLOW EW EW SHES WRONG KAGEYAMA DONT MARRY HER

**Kageyama:** I’m not going to, idiot

**Kageyama:** she’ll forget anyways

**Hinata:** HOW DO YOU KNOW

**Kageyama:** BECAUSE SHE’S YOUNG

**Kageyama:** SHE’LL FORGET WHEN SHE GETS TO HIGH SCHOOL AND SHE’LL GET A BOYFRIEND IDK

**Kageyama:** IM NOT ACTUALLY GONNA MARRY NATSU

**Kageyama:** AND I SAID WE’D GET MARRIED IF SOMETHING HAPPENED BETWEEN ME AND YOU SO JUST DONT BE AN IDIOT AND WE’LL BE FINE

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA YOURE THE IDIOT

**Sugawara:** That’s so cute Kageyama omg what happened tho, like why’d you tell her that?

**Kageyama:** She gave me a letter that said she loved me and I told her I love Shouyou and she started crying

**Kageyama:** and then she said she was gonna run away 

**Kageyama:** dramatic like her brother

**Hinata:** HEY

**Kageyama:** it’s cute

**Kageyama:** So then I told her all the marriage stuff

**Kageyama:** And she stopped crying and got so happy and hugged me

**Hinata:** YOU KISSED HER FOREHEAD 

**Kageyama:** IT WAS A SMALL KISS

**Hinata:** STILL

**Kuroo:** KAGEYAMA YOURE SO CUTE OMG OMG

**Bokuto:** IMAGINE KAGEYAMA TELLING YOU THAT HES GONNA MARRY YOU

**Kageyama:** Now Hinata is sitting next to me and hugging my arm super tight

**Kageyama:** Natsu is trying to sit between us omg

**Kageyama:** her and Shouyou are arguing omg 

**Kageyama:** shou’s mom is laughing omg I’m so embarrassed 

**Kenma:** THIS IS ALL HAPPENINF IN FRONT OF THEIR MOM AHAH

**Hinata:** WE’RE NEVER HANGING OUT WITH MY FAMILY AGAIN TOBIO

**Hinata:** EVERYONE IN THIS HOUSE IS IN LOVE WITH YOU

**Kageyama:** It’s funny lol your family is cute

**Hinata:** ITS NOT FUNNY OR CUTE

**Kageyama:** lol

**Hinata:** WHATEVER WHATEVER IM TOO BUSY LOOKING AT WEDDING DECORATIONS WITH NATSU

**Kageyama:** Shouyou

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Kageyama:** I love you 😊

**Hinata:** AHHHH

**Hinata** left the group

**Kageyama:** lol

**Kageyama:** he’s so cute

**Kuroo:** YOURE CUTE TOO KAGEYAMA 

**Iwaizumi:** Aw he used such a happy emoji ❤️❤️

**Oikawa:** OH MY GODDDDD

**Kenma:** MY HEART IS FUCKING BULGING OUT OF MY CHEST DUDE

**Akaashi:** CUTE CUTE SO CUTE

-

**Kageyama:** _ Attached Image _

**Kageyama:** he’s happy again :-)))

**Tanaka:** hm

**Tanaka:** something about this picture looks🤰🏻

**Kiyoko:** HAHAH RYUU DONT JUST CALL THEM OUT

**Tanaka:** LMAO DOESNT IT THOUGH

**Kiyoko:** IT DOES 

**Kiyoko:** Shirtless Kageyama

**Kiyoko:** and Hinata on his chest

**Kiyoko:** the blanket covering just under Hinata’s shoulders

**Kiyoko:** that content, yet exhausted smile on Hinata’s face

**Kiyoko: 🤰🏻** indeed

**Tanaka:** I’m IN LOVE WITH YOU KIYOKO AHAH

**Kiyoko:** LMAOOO IM IN LOVE WITH YOU TOO 

**Nishinoya:** AHHH EVERYONE IS IN LOVE

**Nishinoya:** INCLUDING ME AND ASAHI LOOK

**Nishinoya:** _ Attached Image _

**Nishinoya:** HE FELL ASLEEP WHILE WE WERE WATCHING NOZAKI KUN

**Kiyoko:** GET MARRIED GET MARRIED RIGHT NOW

**Nishinoya:** YOU AND TANAKA GET MARRIED FOREVER LITERALLY NEVER STOP GETTING MARRIED

**Daichi:** a different ceremony every day lmao

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** Suga’s just wearing my sweater and on his phone lol

**Sugawara:** I’m making a tough decision right now

**Kageyama:** what is it?

**Sugawara:** my mom wants a picture of me and Daichi to print out lol

**Kiyoko:** CUTE GET MARRIED RIGHT NOW LITERALLY I’LL BE THE WITNESS AND ALSO SEND ME WHATEVER PICTURE YOU SEND YOUR MOM

**Sugawara:** lmaoooo

**Kenma:** Tetsu is just hugging me while while we watch Tik Toks lol

**Kiyoko:** MARRIAGE RIGHT NOW

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki just took his glasses off and he’s refusing to pick up his phone because he just wants to cuddle lmao 

**Kiyoko:** AHHHH CUTE CUTE

**Kiyoko:** BOKUTO AND AKAASHI I NEED AN UPDATE ON WHAT YOURE DOING

**Kiyoko:** OIKAWA AND IWAIZUMI

**Kiyoko:** LEV AND YAKU??????

**Kiyoko:** ATSUMU GIVE ME A KITA UPDATE PLEASE!!!

**Bokuto:** Akaashi was really tired today so I’m just letting him cuddle me while he sleeps lol but I’m about to join him

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan won't stop kissing my head lmaooo he’s so cute when he’s sleepy ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

**Lev:** I literally just got off of FaceTime with Yaku lol

**Lev:** He’s going to sleep but he said that we’re getting breakfast together tomorrow

**Atsumu:** Kita is sending me cute selfies and screenshotting all of them

**Kiyoko:** Ryuu we must get dressed

**Tanaka:** ???

**Kiyoko:** look at all these weddings we have to attend

**Tanaka:** Lol you’re being so crazy

**Tanaka:** it’s late

**Kiyoko:** THEYRE ALL CUTE

**Tanaka:** KIYOKO GET BACK IN BED AHHAAH

**Tanaka:** SHES PACING AROUND THE ROOM

**Tanaka:** Okay I’ve convinced her to try to calm down 

**Kiyoko:** ITS NOT WORKING IM LITERALLY GONNA HIGH FIVE EVERY STRANGER TOMORROW

**Tanaka:** YOU NEED TO CALM DOWN AHAHAH


	110. I should stop trying because my episodes are just terrible lately

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Atsumu: What is this
> 
> Kenma: It’s important idiot
> 
> Atsumu: Wow okay??

_ I’m Dramatic _

**Oikawa:** Tobio Tobio

**Oikawa:** I come bearing

**Oikawa:** News? Not good not bad, just news

**Kageyama:** For me

**Oikawa:** Who else would it be for when I said your name

**Kageyama:** Well it’s in the group chat so i didn't know

**Oikawa:** A girl in my classes knows you

**Kageyama:** ?

**Oikawa:** She knows of you I guess

**Kageyama:** okay?

**Oikawa:** Do you not want to know why????

**Kageyama:** Oh

**Kageyama:** Why

**Oikawa:** Thanks for asking!

**Oikawa:** Her brother lives overseas now and I think he coaches out there

**Oikawa:** But he follows volleyball here

**Oikawa:** And she’s always at the local games and stuff

**Oikawa:** She talks about you a lot to her brother I guess

**Oikawa:** So you have your first fan!!

**Hinata:** I’m his first fan actually

**Kageyama:** Lol aw

**Atsumu:** I’m his second fan

**Kuroo:** You guys are really gonna start this??

**Kuroo:** all while excluding me??? The BIGGEST Kageyama stan

**Hinata:** Did she say anything about me???

**Kuroo:** Are you ignoring me???

**Oikawa:** Not that I remember. Sorry Shouyou

**Hinata:** 😟

**Kageyama:** Don’t be sad over something like that

**Oikawa:** Girls are usually talking about Tobio

**Oikawa:** And I get to tell them all the fun stories about him

**Iwaizumi:** You never had fun with him

**Iwaizumi:** Not until like months ago 

**Oikawa:** No no incorrect

**Kageyama:** You hated me but okay

**Oikawa:** I didn’t hate you

**Oikawa:** just a little jealous

**Oikawa:** You can’t be younger than me and better than me. It’s not fair!!!!

**Iwaizumi:** stop that

**Kageyama:** I don’t think I’m better than you

**Kageyama:** You’re more normal

**Oikawa:** Is that supposed to make me feel better?????!

**Kageyama:** I’m just good at analyzing the court

**Kageyama:** And as long as I know my teammates, I should be fine

**Kageyama:** But I always wanted to be a setter like you, Oikawa

**Kageyama:** You’re consistent and reliable

**Kageyama:** And no matter what the situation is, you never need to clear your head

**Kageyama:** Sometimes I get so caught up in the game that I get frustrated

**Oikawa:** AHH SHUT UP TOBIO

**Iwaizumi:** His face is so red omg

**Kageyama:** Lol I just accepted the fact that I could never be like you

**Kageyama:** So I tried my hardest to perfect where I am

**Sugawara:** Now I’m jealous

**Kageyama:** No no Suga!!

**Kageyama:** I owe all of my teamwork to you

**Kageyama:** The way you just keep the team grounded

**Kageyama:** Your control of the court is insane

**Kageyama:** And the way you just shift the energy 

**Kageyama:** You guys are both so good at motivating the team

**Kageyama:** I could never do that

**Sugawara:** Aw thank youuu. But I’m sure you could Tobio.

**Sugawara:** You don’t give yourself enough credit

**Hinata:** Kageyama is so awesome!! But he never understands that!!!!

**Hinata:** Ew Oikawa, next time tell her that he has a boyfriend

**Kageyama:** What?

**Hinata:** Ew girls just think about you

**Hinata:** Kageyama no

**Kageyama:** I can’t control it???

**Oikawa:** She did say he was handsome sooooo

**Hinata:** HE HAS A BOYFRIEND AHHH

**Kageyama:** I don't even know her 

**Hinata:** 😡

**Kageyama:** lmao

**Hinata:** Don’t laugh at me😡

**Kageyama:** You’re so cute lol

**Kageyama:** Also come back here idiot

**Kageyama:** I feel lonely

**Hinata:** I just wanted a snack

**Nishinoya:** They’re just 🤢 cuddling🤢

**Sugawara:** Shut up lmaooooo

**Nishinoya:** Disgusting

**Nishinoya:** Asahi come cuddle with me

**Asahi:** I thought you weren’t home??

**Nishinoya:** I will be in like five minutes 😠

**Asahi:** How was I supposed to know???

**Nishinoya:** MY BOYFRIEND WANTS ME DEAD

**Asahi:** HE DOES NOT

**Asahi:** HE’S RUNNING TO YOUR PLACE RIGHT NOW

**Nishinoya:** Aww babe you’re so sweet 🥺

**Sugawara:** omg

-

**Kenma** changed the group name to 💗 _ Omegaverse Baddies✨ _

**Kenma:** I have an important question!!!

**Kenma:** What’s your omegaverse scent??

**Kenma:** Akaashi is coconut!

**Akaashi:** oh

**Akaashi:** okay lol

**Kuroo:** KENMA HAHA

**Kenma:** Maybe I’m cherries

**Kuroo:** You are!!!

**Kuroo:** You smell so good all the time omg

**Kenma:** My alpha bf 🥰

**Kuroo:** My omega bf 🥰

**Atsumu:** What

**Akaashi:** LMAOOOOO

**Daichi:** How do I answer this question?

**Daichi:** Do I want to answer this question?

**Kenma:** Yes

**Kenma:** What is Suga’s scent

**Daichi:** ???

**Daichi:** Maybe cookies? 

**Sugawara:** Really?

**Daichi:** Yeah idk it just sounds right. Sometimes you smell like sweets

**Atsumu:** What is this

**Kenma:** It’s important idiot

**Atsumu:** Wow okay??

**Bokuto:** I don't know what omegaverse is????

**Kenma:** What do you want me to do about it?

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI HELP

**Akaashi:** Just look it up real quick Bokuto lol

**Bokuto:** I looked it up

**Bokuto:** I still don’t know what it is

**Kenma:** Sucks to suck, idiot

**Akaashi:** Omg Kenma

**Lev:** YAKU SMELLS LIKE PEACHES

**Yaku:** Of all things to respond to in the group you chose this one lmao

**Lev:** ❤️❤️

**Lev:** YAKU PLEASE SEND HEARTS BACK

**Yaku: ❤️**

**Kageyama:** Hinata smells so good omg

**Iwaizumi:** Like strawberries

**Kageyama:** YES HE SMELLS SO NICE

**Oikawa:** I have a feeling that Shouyou’s would be strawberry

**Iwaizumi:** lmao

**Oikawa:** Tobio is scary

**Kageyama:** I’M NOT

**Iwaizumi:** He’s just in love

**Kageyama:** EXACTLY

**Hinata:** SHUT UP STUPID

**Kageyama:** DONT CALL ME STUPID

**Kenma:** IN LOVE THEY'RE SO IN LOVE

-

**Sugawara:** I’ve had this song just STABBING MY BRAIN

**Daichi:** What is it?

**Oikawa:** You respond so fast when Suga texts

**Daichi:** Because I love him

**Oikawa:** lmao okay fair enough

**Sugawara:** Fuck being good I’m a bad bitch

**Kunimi:** I’m sick of motherfuckers tryna tell me how to live

**Kindaichi:** ???

**Kenma:** Wack hoes hate under my pictures on the gram

**Akaashi:** Bitch you better hope I never run across your man

**Sugawara:** THAT SONG IS IN MY BRAIN EVERY 7 MINUTES I SWEAR

**Kageyama:** Lmaoo Shouyou listens to it a lot too

**Kindaichi:** What song is that

**Oikawa:** Wow

**Oikawa:** Someone doesn’t know their Meg

**Kindaichi:** Am I supposed to??

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t mean to throw you under the bus

**Iwaizumi:** But there’s a lot of meg thee stallion on our warmup playlist

**Oikawa:** KINDAICHI YOU DON’T LISTEN TO THE PLAYLIST I MADE

**Kindaichi:** There’s a playlist???

**Oikawa:** Omg

**Kunimi:** Are you even on the team????

**Oikawa:** NOT ANYMORE

**Oikawa:** COME BACK WHEN YOU KNOW YOUR MEGAN, LOSER


	111. I need to clean my room and do laundry and die teehee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: Kenma, call me daddy
> 
> Kenma: are you stupid?
> 
> Kuroo: 😿😿
> 
> Kenma: you are stupid

💗 _ Omegaverse Baddies✨ _

**Hinata:** I thought Kuroo and Kenma were joking about the whole kitten thing

**Hinata:** Like

**Hinata:** I thought they just thought it sounded cute or something

**Hinata:** I didn’t know they actually said it when they

**Hinata:** When they um

**Kuroo:** Fuck

**Kenma:** Lmao

**Kuroo:** I just call him that all the time

**Kuroo:** I do think it’s cute

**Kuroo:** But I also think it’s 😈😈

**Kuroo:** Like if we’re just cuddling and watching tv and i call him kitten, it’s not like we get horny instantly

**Kenma:** Speak for yourself 🥵

**Kuroo:** Lmaooo

**Hinata:** AHHH

**Kenma:** I’m joking

**Hinata:** AHHH

**Kuroo:** also, why would I joke about that? 

**Hinata:** AHHHHH IDK IDK

**Sugawara:** It’s normal Hinata lol

**Sugawara:** Like, Daichi calls me baby all the time

**Sugawara:** sometimes it’s cute, sometimes it’s hot 😋

**Hinata:** It’s just confusing to me

**Sugawara:** Well what does Kageyama call you??

**Hinata:** When we

**Hinata:** fuck?

**Sugawara:** lol yes

**Hinata:** Shouyou

**Hinata:** Or baby sometimes

**Sugawara:** So if he calls you Shouyou at like dinner, do you get horny?

**Hinata:** NO BECAUSE THATS MY NAME

**Sugawara:** Okay then, if he calls you baby at dinner, do you get horny??

**Hinata:** NO THAT’D BE WEIRD IT’S JUST A PET NAME

**Sugawara:** Exactly

**Sugawara:** It just depends on the situation

**Hinata:** AHHHHH

**Sugawara:** But I guess if I just made you hyper aware I might as well add something

**Sugawara:** You can always just reserve names for when you fuck and names for when you’re out

**Hinata:** But I like when he calls me baby 🥰

**Hinata:** also I don’t get that. What??

**Sugawara:** Like sometimes I call Daichi daddy when we fuck

**Sugawara:** But I don’t call him that in public

**Sugawara:** Unless I want to like

**Sugawara:** Tease him I guess but I don’t say it loudly lol

**Hinata:** I THOUGHT YOU WERE JOKING ABOUT THAT

**Sugawara:** Why would i joke about that?

**Hinata:** AHHHH IDK IDK

**Kageyama:** Idiot, just let things happen naturally

**Kageyama:** And stop freaking out about the things other people are into

**Kageyama:** You're probably making them feel weird

**Kuroo:** Kageyama said “kinky rights”

**Sugawara:** Lmaooo

**Sugawara:** Either way Kitten is cute and it suits Kenma 🥰

**Kuroo:** um I don’t know if I can say the same about Daddy but uhhh

**Kuroo:** thank you lmaoooo

**Sugawara:** good

**Sugawara:** Don’t say anything about daddy🙃

**Kuroo:** Kenma, call me daddy

**Kenma:** are you stupid?

**Kuroo:** 😿😿

**Kenma:** you are stupid

**Kageyama:** Hinata where are you

**Hinata:** I FORGOT I WAS COMING OVER OMG KAGEYAMA IM SORRY

**Kageyama:** take your your time

**Kageyama:** I was just worried something happened

**Hinata:** IM RUNNING

**Kageyama:** WHY 

**Hinata:** I WANNA SEE YOU

**Kageyama:** IDIOT I WANNA SEE YOU TOO BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TO RUN

**Yamaguchi:** He’s actually running omg

**Yamaguchi:** He just ran past me omg

**Hinata:** okay I’m here

**Hinata:** yamaguchi

**Hinata:** you and Tsukki should come to Kageyama’s later

**Yamaguchi:** What’s happening later?

**Hinata:** Nothing but I don’t want to just invite you guys over so you can watch me hug Tobio for an hour

**Yamaguchi:** okay lol

**Tsukishima:** you’re just gonna hug for an hour what

**Hinata:** YES

**Hinata:** We haven’t seen each other for a few days lol

**Yamaguchi:** we’ll come over later!

**Tsukishima:** No

**Yamaguchi:** yes

**Tsukishima:** No

**Yamaguchi:** okay then I’m going without you

**Tsukishima:** no

**Yamaguchi:** then we’re going

**Tsukishima:** no

**Yamaguchi:** I’m done listening to you today

**Yamaguchi:** just tell us when to come over!

**Kageyama:** okay!

**Asahi:** Lmaooo Yamaguchi

**Kenma:** lets talk about how Yamaguchi just doesn’t care what Tsukishima has to say

**Yamaguchi:** lol I wanna hang out with them so I’m going with or without him

**Tsukishima:** no

**Yamaguchi:** Will you stop that lol

**Tsukishima:** no

**Yamaguchi:** omg

**Kenma:** WAIT HINATA AND KAGEYAMA JYST HUGGING FOREVER WTF BECAUSE THEY MISS EACH OTHER WTF

**Sugawara:** CUTE SO CUTE

**Hinata:** AHHH

**Kageyama:** He’s so embarrassed 

**Kageyama:** He’s not even letting me see his face

**Kageyama:** But his ears are so red lol

**Hinata:** SHUT UP STUPID

**Kageyama:** WOULD YOU JUST LOOK AT ME SO I CAN KISS YOU IDIOT

**Sugawara:** OMGOMG OMGOMG KENMA KENMA

**Kenma:** AHHHHHH KISS HIM KISS HIM

**-**

**Oikawa:** EVERYONE 

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ Iwa-chan ✨🥺💘 _

**Oikawa:** Okay I fixed it

**Oikawa:** Anyways

**Oikawa:** EVERYONE

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan has been working so much over time

**Oikawa:** Because my man is chasing his bag

**Oikawa:** And like he’s been so so tired

**Oikawa:** So he works right after his classes. When he comes home I’m already asleep and usually he’s in class by the time I wake up

**Oikawa:** But today

**Oikawa:** His first class was cancelled so he got to sleep in ☺️

**Oikawa:** I woke up and he was sleeping, right?

**Oikawa:** And he was holding my hand while sleeping

**Oikawa:** Like our hands were just on his chest while he slept and omg

**Oikawa:** He’s so tired

**Oikawa:** So send Iwa-chan some love because he’s been super busy

**Oikawa:** Not too much love though because I’ll kill you (✿╹◡╹)

**Osamu:** Calm down

**Oikawa:** ESPECIALLY YOU

**Kunimi:** Calm down

**Oikawa:** ACTUALLY I CHANGED MY MIND

**Oikawa:** ESPECIALLY YOU KUNIMI

**Kunimi:** I have a boyfriend

**Daichi:** Does he work over the weekend too?

**Oikawa:** Nope! I convinced him to take his normal day off

**Daichi:** That’s good!

**Oikawa:** I know! I can’t wait to fall asleep next to him again 

**Oikawa:** I just miss him so much

**Sugawara:** Aww, I’d feel so lonely if Daichi was working so much

**Oikawa:** Right??

**Oikawa:** I always try to stay up so I can at least welcome him home but I’m always so tired for no reason

**Daichi:** I’m sure he misses you too

**Oikawa:** Maybe

**Daichi:** I’m sure he does

**Iwaizumi:** I do

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan 🥺

**Iwaizumi:** I miss you so much

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t even know how we lived separately for so long

**Iwaizumi:** I might die

**Oikawa:** iwa-chan I miss you so much

**Iwaizumi:** Lmao this weekend will be fun though

**Iwaizumi:** We’ll do whatever you want

**Oikawa:** Yay!!! ❤️

**Iwaizumi:** ❤️

**Sugawara:** OMG EVERYONE HERE IS MAKING ME DIE

-

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki keeps a picture of us as kids in his wallet

**Yamaguchi:** It’s so cute

**Yamaguchi:** He was so tall as a kid

**Yamaguchi:** He’s still tall now but you know what I mean

**Yamaguchi:** Do you think people see the picture when he’s out

**Yamaguchi:** WAIT

**Yamaguchi:** Do you think OMGOMG

**Yamaguchi:** Do you think people ask who it is and OMG

**Yamaguchi:** OMGOMG

**Yamaguchi:** And he says like “That’s me and my boyfriend when we were kids.”

**Yamaguchi:** OMG OMG DO PEOPLE JUST KNOW ME AND TSUKKI ARE BOYFRIENDS OMG

**Kenma:** I sensed Hinata energy and I didn’t think it’d be you Yamaguchi

**Kenma:** but OMG THATS SO CUTE TO THINK ABOUT

**Kenma:** DO YOU THINK HE GETS A LITTLE SHY

**Kenma:** Or they ask and he like looks at the picture and smiles a little

**Yamaguchi:** OMG OMG

**Yamaguchi:** YOU JUST THOUGHT OF THAT 

**Kenma:** DO YOU THINK PEOPLE ASK TO LOOK AT IT

**Kenma:** OR LIKE DO YOU THINK THEY ASK HIM ABOUT YOU GUYS AND HE ACCIDENTALLY TALKS ABOUT YOU FOR A LONG TIME AND HE GETS EMBARASSED

**Yamaguchi:** I NEED ANSWERS TSUKKI

**Tsukishima:** Why would you bring this to the group chat omg

**Yamaguchi:** BECAUSE IT’S CUTE

**Tsukishima:** I mean that’s all kinda accurate

**Tsukishima:** Some people ask if we’re still close and I say we’re dating

**Yamaguchi:** OH OH OH

**Yamaguchi:** I’M GONNA DIE TSUKKI YOU’RE SO CUTE YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE ME DIE

**Tsukishima:** You’re the one that asked me about it

**Yamaguchi:** KENMA 

**Yamaguchi:** KENMA DID YOU SEE THAT

**Kenma:** YES

**Yamaguchi:** OMGOMG

**Kenma:** I’M GONNA PUNCH EVERYTHING IN MY ROOM


	112. Writing this episode was like a breath of fresh air tbh i've missed writing these so much i have just had -10000 ideas and no energy oops oops

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daichi: Atsumu I’m weirdly beginning to think you have a type
> 
> Atsumu: WHAT
> 
> Atsumu: WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT TO ME

**Kuroo** changed the group name to  _ Brain Rot ❤️ _

**Sugawara:** Cute

**Sugawara:** What’s rotting your brain?

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Akaashi:** He rots my brain too

**Hinata:** Me too

**Oikawa:** Me too

**Osamu:** Me too

**Oikawa:** OSAMU DON’T TRY TO STEAL KUROO’S BOYFRIEND

**Osamu:** I’M NOT???

**Kuroo:** WAIT WE’RE PAUSING

**Kuroo:** OSAMU??

**Osamu:** HE’S SO CUTE

**Kuroo:** OMG OMG I KNOW

**Kuroo:** Guys I officially have a favorite Miya twin

**Atsumu:** ?!?!??! I CALLED KENMA CUTE ONCE AND YOU TOLD ME TO SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** BECAUSE I DON’T LIKE IT WHEN YOU CALL HIM CUTE

**Atsumu:** THIS ISN’T FAIR

**Osamu:** I think it is

**Atsumu:** I wish I never met you

**Osamu:** Stupid

**Kuroo:** UM ANYWAYS??

**Kuroo:** I keep thinking about like

**Kuroo:** OMG LIKE ME AND KENMA STARTING A FAMILY

**Kuroo:** Not having kids

**Kenma:** Ew imagine us as parents 

**Kuroo:** I don’t even want to

**Akaashi:** You guys would literally be horrible

**Sugawara:** Aww Akaashi don’t say that

**Akaashi:** It’s true

**Kenma:** It’s true

**Kenma:** Think about it

**Sugawara:** Yeah okay you’re right

**Kuroo:** We’d be the worst 

**Kuroo:** Also Kenma doesn’t like kids

**Kuroo:** BUT LIKE

**Kuroo:** BEING A CUTE FAMILY AS LIKE 

**Kuroo:** DOG AND CAT PARENTS

**Kuroo:** WE JUST HAVE A HOUSE AND HAVE LIKE A MILLION ANIMALS TOGETHER

**Sugawara:** YES YES YES THAT WOULD BE SO CUTE

**Kuroo:** WE TAKE THE DOGS ON MORNING WALKS

**Kenma:** Morning? Be realistic Tetsurou 

**Kuroo:** WE TAKE THE DOGS ON EVENING WALKS

**Oikawa:** LMFAO

**Kuroo:** AND THEY CUDDLE WITH US ON THE COUCH AND ON OUR BED

**Sugawara:** YES YES YES OMG

**Kuroo:** Omg

**Kuroo:** I want a dog

**Kenma:** We already have a cat though

**Kuroo:** But I want a dog

**Kuroo:** Like. Just picture it

**Kuroo:** Us sleeping at night with a cat AND a dog in our bed

**Kuroo:** Baby it would be so cute

**Kenma:** Our apartment is too small for a dog

**Kuroo:** It isn’t!!!

**Kuroo:** We could get a small dog!!!!

**Kenma:** Yeah but I know you want a big dog

**Kenma:** So let’s just wait

**Kuroo:** YOU JUST KNOW THAT AHHHH

**Kenma:** Why wouldn’t I? Weirdo

**Kuroo:** Ahhh brain rot brain rot

**Kenma:** You’re so weird

**Kuroo:** NO I JUST LOVE YOU SO MUCH

**Kenma:** Stop

**Kuroo:** WE’LL JUST HAVE A HOUSE AND HAVE LIKE TWO OR THREE DOGS AND LIKE ONE OR TWO OR FIVE OR A MILLION CATS

**Hinata:** Why do you need that many cats?

**Kenma:** Why not? 😼

**Akaashi:** Kuroo I thought you didn’t like cats

**Kuroo:** I think I changed my mind

**Daichi:** Wow

**Kuroo:** NO YOU DON’T GET IT

**Kuroo:** WHEN I WORK LATE AND I COME HOME AND KENMA IS ALREADY SLEEPING 

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** THE CAT IS ALWAYS CURLED UP NEXT TO HIM IN MY SPOT

**Kuroo:** IT’S SO CUTE

**Kuroo:** IT ALWAYS MAKES ME WANT TO CRY

**Kenma:** TETSUROU YOU’RE INSANE

**Kuroo:** BRAIN ROT BRAIN ROT

**Akaashi:** SHUT UP OMG

\--

**Atsumu:** OMFG I JUST THOUGHT OF SOMETHING

**Atsumu** added  **Kita Shinsuke** to the chat

**Atsumu:** KITA KITA

**Kita:** Oh god

**Kita:** What

**Atsumu:** WHAT IF I CALLED YOU DUMPLING

**Atsumu:** IT’S CUTE AND YOU’RE CUTE AND THERE’S AN EMOJI FOR IT 🥟 

**Kita:** That’s so ugly

**Atsumu:** NO IT ISN’T

**Atsumu:** KITA DON’T SAY THAT

**Kita:** THAT’S SO UGLY

**Atsumu:** NO

**Atsumu:** IT’S CUTE

**Kita:** I think you’re crazy

**Atsumu:** NO??

**Sugawara:** DUMPLING IS SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** But also you sound like an old lady

**Kageyama:** It’s kinda cute

**Kageyama:** Like think about it for a second

**Atsumu:** EXACTLY LIKE LET IT MARANADE IN YOUR BRAIN

**Kita:** Do you mean marinate?

**Kita:** Idiot

**Atsumu:** Kita I added you to this chat to be in love and what are you doing?

**Atsumu:** Bullying me

**Kita:** It’s what you deserve tsumu

**Atsumu:** You’re SO MEAN

**Kita:** Just call me baby like a normal person 

**Atsumu:** I already do that

**Kita:** Just call me baby 

**Atsumu:** ???!!!

**Sugawara:** Call him baby Atsumu

**Kageyama:** Don’t be shy

**Kuroo:** Do it do it

**Atsumu:** I HATE IT HERE

**Kita:** You’re stupid

**Kita:** Why are you being shy

**Atsumu:** LEAVE ME ALONE

**Osamu:** What’s wrong with you

**Osamu:** It’s not hard

**Osamu:** I call Suna baby in the groupchats we’re in

**Sugawara:** SUNA????

**Kuroo:** Suna???

**Kita:** SUNA?

**Osamu** left the group

**Atsumu** added  **Osamu** to the group

**Atsumu:** YOU CAN’T JUST LEAVE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IDIOT

**Osamu:** SAYS YOU

**Atsumu:** EXCUSE ME

**Kita:** Atsumu you’re an idiot

**Kita:** Are you visiting me this weekend?

**Atsumu:** Yes! I’m leaving tomorrow at like 6

**Kita:** Ew in the morning?

**Atsumu:** Yes

**Atsumu:** That way I’ll be there as soon as you wake up ❤️

**Kita:** Omg

**Kita:** You should facetime me as soon as you’re out of class

**Atsumu:** I can just leave class now 😎

**Kita:** Don’t you dare. Idiot

**Atsumu:** FINE

**Sugawara:** OMG KITA HE’S VISITING YOU???

**Sugawara:** ATSUMU WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL US

**Atsumu:** I DON’T HAVE TO TELL YOU GUYS EVERYTHING

**Sugawara:** Long distance tingz 😢

**Oikawa:** 💔

**Atsumu:** SHUT UP LMAO

**Kageyama:** WAIT NO I JUST THOUGHT OF SOMETHING

**Kageyama:** IS THIS YOUR FIRST TIME SEEING EACH OTHER SINCE YOU STARTED DATING?

**Kita:** Yes

**Atsumu:** Yeah

**Kageyama:** Omg omg 

**Atsumu:** TOBIO SHUT UP

**Kageyama:** OMG OMG

**Kenma:** LONG DISTANCE TINGZ

**Atsumu:** SHUT UP

-

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** LOOK AT THIS

**Atsumu:** HE WON’T STOP HUGGING ME

**Kita:** You smell good idk

**Daichi:** Atsumu I’m weirdly beginning to think you have a type

**Atsumu:** WHAT

**Atsumu:** WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT TO ME

**Kageyama:** Lol

**Kageyama:** He calls you an idiot all the time

**Kageyama:** He likes how you smell

**Atsumu:** STOP WTF

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** YOU CAN’T JUST SPAM THE CHAT WITH PICTURES OF YOU AND YOUR BOYFRIEND TO MAKE US FORGET 

**Atsumu:** YES I CAN

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Osamu:** STOP

**Sugawara:** NO DON’T STOP IT’S SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** KITA YOU’RE SO CUTE WTF

**Sugawara:** I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT YOU LOOKED LIKE????

**Kita:** Aww thank you

**Sugawara:** THE THIRD PICTURE YOU SENT ATSUMU WTF

**Atsumu:** THAT WAS HIM MEETING ME AT THE TRAIN STATION

**Atsumu:** I DIDN’T THINK HE WAS GOING TO BE THERE I WAS SO SURPRISED

**Kita:** WHY WOULDN’T I BE THERE

**Atsumu:** IDK

**Atsumu:** KITA YOU’RE SO CUTE

**Kuroo:** Call him baby call him baby

**Oikawa:** CALL HIM BABY

**Kita:** Call me baby

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Daichi:** STOP OMG

**Sugawara:** DON’T LISTEN TO HIM ATSUMU

**Osamu:** Dude why do you have a million pictures already

**Osamu:** You haven’t even been with him for 8 hours yet

**Atsumu** has removed  **Osamu** from the chat

\--

**Yamaguchi:** My homework is due in an hour

**Sugawara:** Oh?

**Sugawara:** Did you do it? 

**Yamaguchi:** No

**Yamaguchi:** I didn't even start it 

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi!!!

**Yamaguchi:** I’M SORRY I’M SORRY

**Yamaguchi:** It just feels like so much right now for no reason :-( like I’m so overwhelmed

**Yamaguchi:** and it’s honestly such a simple assignment 

**Yamaguchi:** I just. Cannot do it

**Sugawara:** Well that’s okay!!!

**Sugawara:** It’s one assignment after all

**Sugawara:** Can you turn it in late?

**Yamaguchi:** I don’t think so

**Sugawara:** Hmm

**Sugawara:** Well. Turn it in late anyways

**Yamaguchi:** That’s the plan 😎

\--

**Kenma:** Today is the worst day of my life

**Kuroo:** Kittennnn don’t say that

**Hinata:** EW

**Kenma:** SHUT UP SHOUYOU, IT'S THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE

**Kuroo:** STOP DON'T SAY THAT YOU LOOK SO CUTE

**Oikawa:** What happened??

**Kenma:** the worst thing ever

**Oikawa:** Ok nevermind 

**Kenma:** NO OKAY SO

**Kenma:** I WAS BLEACHING MY HAIR 

**Kenma:** LIKE AT THE ENDS

**Kenma:** AND I’M AN IDIOT

**Kenma:** AN IMPATIENT IDIOT

**Oikawa:** ….Oh no

**Sugawara:** oh god

**Kenma:** AND I WAS LIKE WHATEVER AND BLEACHED IT AGAIN IN THE SAME DAY BECAUSE THE FIRST TIME DIDN’T DO ANYTHING

**Atsumu:** KENMA

**Kenma:** I KNOW

**Kenma:** I KNEW IT WAS WRONG I JUST DIDN’T WANT TO WAIT

**Kenma:** And now my ends are breaking off and kinda fried and I had to cut my hair 

**Kuroo:** Kitten I know you don’t like it, but it looks really cute 

**Kuroo:** It‘s not even that short 

**Kenma:** I CAN’T PUT IT UP ANYMORE

**Kenma:** _ attached image _

**Kenma:** I HAVEN’T HAD IT THIS SHORT SINCE HIGH SCHOOL

**Sugawara:** KENMA IT’S STILL LONG

**Kenma:** IT’S TO MY SHOULDERS

**Sugawara:** It’s cute!! Kenma you LOOK SO CUTE!!

**Oikawa:** YOU DO KENMA

**Oikawa:** YOU LOOK SO CUTE

**Oikawa:** I think I’m going to explode

**Kuroo:** It looks good, Kenma

**Kenma:** I HATE IT HERE AND I'M NEVER LEAVING MY BED BECAUSE I DON'T WANT ANYONE TO LOOK AT ME EVER

**Kuroo:** KITTEN NO

**Akaashi:** KENMA NO

**Akaashi:** YOU LOOK FINE

**Akaashi:** YOU’RE DRAMATIC

**Kenma:** SORRY I CAN’T HEAR YOU FROM NEVER LEAVING MY BED EVER AGAIN


	113. I literally love writing these but my brain feels dry. Maybe it’s because I have a headache and haven’t had caffeine all day😎😎😎

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daichi: he’s so cute about it
> 
> Tanaka: Shouldn’t you be embarrassed???
> 
> Sugawara: I just love Daichi so much 

_ Brain Rot ❤️ _

**Akaashi:** Okay guys I need???

**Akaashi:** Comfort???

**Akaashi:** I’m JUST ???

**Bokuto:** What happened???

**Akaashi:** Okay HAHAHA IM LAUGHING BUT IM CONFUSED

**Akaashi:** So uhh

**Akaashi:** I have this uncle

**Akaashi:** He’s terrible, right?

**Akaashi:** Like he’s just a horrible person

**Akaashi:** I’ve never been close to him

**Akaashi:** because he’s the worst

**Akaashi:** And like our families were fighting just the other day 🥰

**Akaashi:** And yeah. He died today and my mom is like “What do we say? How do we even approach them after all of the shit they said to us?”

**Akaashi:** AND IM JUST LAUGHING BECAUSE WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO AHHA

**Oikawa:** What a weird situation omg

**Oikawa:** Call me if you need anything!

**Akaashi:** Okay, thank you

**Kenma:** I can come over?

**Akaashi:** It’s okay lol thank youuu

**Bokuto:** Keiji, are you okay?

**Akaashi:** I’m fine?? Just uncomfy haha

**Akaashi:** I just need to be comforted or something idk

**Sugawara:** I would also be uncomfortable lmao

**Akaashi:** Okay I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t like

**Akaashi:** Crazy or anything lmao

**Bokuto:** I’M COMING OVER

**Akaashi:** why? Lmao don’t you have class?

**Bokuto:** I’ll skip for my Akaashi!!

**Akaashi:** Lmaooo okay

**Bokuto:** I’LL GIVE YOU ALL OF THE COMFORT YOU NEED

**Osamu:** No i will

**Atsumu:** I’m telling Suna

**Osamu:** Bokuto quick!! Go comfort him!!!

**Oikawa:** Whore 

**Osamu:** Hey 😢

**Atsumu:** Is he wrong?

**Osamu:** 😢

**Kageyama:** That’s kinda mean

**Osamu:** I miss you Tobio 😢

**Osamu:** Why did you ever like my brother?

**Kageyama:** Cause I thought he was hot

**Atsumu:** THATS IT???

**Kageyama:** And you’re good at volleyball

**Atsumu:** Omg I’m kind of offended?

**Kita:** what were you expecting?

**Atsumu:** Idk maybe he thought I had an amazing personality

**Sugawara:** lmao

**Kita:** lmaooo

**Atsumu:** WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

**Atsumu:** KITA WHAT

**Kita:** don’t worry. You’re perfect babe lol

**Atsumu:** AHHH

**Osamu:** Atsumu is scary

**Atsumu:** I’m not!!!

**Osamu:** you are

**Atsumu:** I’m gonna kill my own brother

**Osamu:** you’re not

**Atsumu:** I am

**Kita:** you’re not

**Atsumu:** I am

**Oikawa:** omg shut up I hate you both

**Osamu:** Don’t be mean

**Kita:** he’s being honest

**Atsumu:** hey what the hell!!

**Kageyama:** He’s being honest

**Osamu:** Kageyama :-(

**Daichi:** he’s being honest

**Osamu:** WAIT DAICHI WHAT DID WE EVER DO TO YOU

**Osamu:** YOU JUST ARENT GONNA REPLY

**Sugawara:** lol

**Atsumu:** WHY

**-**

**Oikawa:** maybe I’m dying

**Oikawa:** I was using the bathroom right

**Oikawa:** and my nose started bleeding

**Oikawa:** like I just stopped it

**Oikawa:** and I got a phone call from Yahaba and told him“hold on my nose is bleeding” and he was confused and I’m weirdly embarrassed

**Oikawa:** maybe I’m dying

**Sugawara:** um

**Sugawara:** are you okay?

**Oikawa:** maybe I’m dying

**Iwaizumi:** you’re not dying lmao

**Iwaizumi:** you just had a nose bleed

**Oikawa:** those are so rare for me Iwa-Chan!!

**Iwaizumi:** well did you die when you last had one

**Oikawa:** obviously not

**Iwaizumi:** then you’re fine

**Oikawa:** you’d rather have me dead

**Iwaizumi:** no

**Oikawa:** yes

**Iwaizumi:** stop being annoying

**Oikawa:** RUDE

**Sugawara:** suddenly I hate it here

**-**

**Sugawara:** day 3 of wondering if Daichi will fuck me

**Oikawa:** omg you have no shame

**Sugawara:** Day 3 of wondering if daichi’s gonna break my back

**Akaashi:** lmaoooo

**Sugawara:** Day 3 of wanting Daichi to just wreck me and never stop

**Kenma:** HAHAHA

**Daichi:** would you calm down and talk to me instead of the whole group

**Sugawara:** the people want to know, daichi

**Daichi:** No one even asked

**Sugawara:** But they were wondering!!!

**Daichi:** lmao you’re crazy

**Tanaka:** three days isn’t even that long

**Nishinoya:** The grind doesn’t stop bro

**Oikawa:** I have not heard anyone say that in so long

**Sugawara:** Daichi are you coming over or what??

**Daichi:** Yes

**Sugawara:** YAY

**Daichi:** but we’re eating dinner first

**Sugawara:** bold of you to assume that I’m gonna let you stay in your clothes for that long

**Daichi:** bold of you to assume that that’s gonna stop me from having a nice dinner with my beautiful boyfriend 

**Sugawara:** You’re so cute daichi wtf

**Daichi:** you’re cuter

**Sugawara:** 🥰🥰

**Sugawara:** let me know when you’re on your way!

**Daichi:** I will

**Sugawara: 😚**

**Daichi: 😚**

**Akaashi:** That took such a cute turn lmao

**Oikawa:** it did and I’m shaking

**-**

**Sugawara:** GUYS GUYS DAICHI FUCKS

**Nishinoya:** YAY

**Nishinoya:** ITS BEEN SO LONG

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Daichi Finally Fucks _

**Tanaka:** it was three days

**Sugawara:** ITS BEEN FOREVER

**Tanaka:** omg suga

**Daichi:** he’s cute

**Tanaka:** what

**Daichi:** he’s so cute about it

**Tanaka:** Shouldn’t you be embarrassed???

**Sugawara:** I just love Daichi so much 

**Oikawa:** I-

**Sugawara:** so in love so in love

**Daichi:** so in love so in love

**Hinata:** why aren’t you guys embarrassed?!?

**Kageyama:** because they’re in love

**Nishinoya:** HHAHAHA

**-**

**Nishinoya:** I GOT ASAHI TO WEAR ONE OF MY SHIRTS OMG AHAH

**Tanaka:** PICS

**Asahi:** Noya..

**Nishinoya:** HE MADE ME PROMISE NOT TO SEND ANY PICS

**Tanaka:** but I’m your best bro😿

**Nishinoya:** But he’s my best boyfriend

**Asahi:** best??! 

**Nishinoya:** I JUST WANT YOU ALL TO KNOW THAT HE’S SO CUTE AND EMBARRASSED AND WEIRDLY HE LOOKS HOT

**Asahi:** stop omg

**Nishinoya:** LIKE ASAHI’S BODY IS SO🥵🥵

**Asahi:** please stop omg

**Oikawa:** PICTURES PLEASE

**Nishinoya:** I cant!!!

**Asahi:** No!!!!!

**Kiyoko:** it’d be a shame if I walked into Noya’s place rn because I know he leaves his door unlocked

**Kiyoko:** What a coincidence that Tanaka is here with me wow

**Asahi:** Noya!!! Why don’t you lock your doors! We live close to campus!! PEOPLE WALK HOME DRUNK ALL THE TIME THATS SO DANGEROUS

**Tanaka:** lmao that’s not the point

**Tanaka:** the point is that me and Kiyoko HAVE PICTURES OF YOU TOO

**Asahi:** I’m gonna die IM GONNA DIE

**Nishinoya:** nooo Asahi stop

**Oikawa:** IM SO CURIOUS THIS IS UNFAIR

**Nishinoya:** SORRY I JUST THOUGHT EVERYONE HAD TO KNOW

**Oikawa:** Now I have to imagine it!!!

**Asahi:** can we not talk about this anymore

**Iwaizumi:** What the fuck

**Iwaizumi:** why are you imagining other guys

**Oikawa:** Because think about it!!!

**Iwaizumi:** I would but I’m too busy imagining Tobio in my Seijoh jacket

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN

**Hinata:** WHY IS IT ALWAYS Kageyama

**Kuroo:** Because we’re in love with him

**Oikawa:** Disgusting

**Sugawara:** DONT SAY THAT ABOUT HIM

**Bokuto:** DONT SAY THAT ABOUT HIM

**Hinata:** DONT SAY THAT ABOUT HIM

**Oikawa:** why does this always happen to me?

**Tsukishima:** because you don’t learn from your mistakes

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki loves Kageyama

**Yamaguchi:** once there was a guy hitting on Kageyama when we were out and Kageyama was uncomfortable and Hinata was trying his best but the guy didn’t believe him

**Yamaguchi:** So Tsukishima stepped in and pretended to be his boyfriend lol

**Tsukishima** left 

**Yamaguchi** added  **Tsukishima**

**Tsukishima:** you hate me

**Yamaguchi:** I love you

**Tsukishima:** you don’t act like it

**Oikawa:** wtf ew I hate Tobio more

**Kunimi:** you don’t but okay

**Oikawa:** I DO

**Kunimi:** Matsukawa said that you were whining the other day because Tobio didn’t reply to you

**Oikawa:** Well I hate Mattsun now too

**Iwaizumi:** You do not

**Oikawa:** I DO


	114. my brain today is that one song from Angel Beats that GirlsDEMO is performing while the tickets fall It's like find a way koko kara Found out Mitsukeru so now I'm gonna listen to Girls Dead Monster and cry I guess. Mayhaps I'll rewatch Angel Beats

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Atsumu: You guys have a sex rubric?
> 
> Sugawara: mentally, yes
> 
> Daichi: Is that not normal?

_ Daichi Finally Fucks _

**Hinata:** OMGOMG

**Hinata:** Me and Kageyama just got back from my mom’s place

**Hinata:** Natsu has like this class play coming up

**Hinata:** And she insisted that Kageyama practiced with her

**Hinata:** And she made him play the prince omg he was so embarrassed

**Kenma:** Awww, is she the princess

**Hinata:** …

**Hinata:** No

**Kenma:** Then what is she??

**Hinata:** A forest animal

**Hinata:** Specifically a bunny

**Hinata:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** She looks so cute with the ears on lol

**Asahi:** Aww

**Kageyama:** She’s so cute omg

**Hinata: 🥺** 💗

**Tsukishima:** Wtf

**Tsukishima:** What did she even need to practice???

**Hinata:** Idk lol

**Kenma:** What were you doing Shouyou

**Hinata:** I played the princess!

**Kageyama:** lol

**Tsukishima:** You basically just did a two person show

**Kageyama:** Stop Kei

**Kageyama:** it was cute and she was excited

**Yamaguchi:** awww you guys are so cute

**Nishinoya:** Asahi as a prince SHUT UPPPP

**Asahi:** I think I’m a little too shy to be a prince lol, I wouldn’t get anything done

**Nishinoya:** THAT’S WHY I TELL YOU TO BE CONFIDENT ASAHI

**Nishinoya:** YOU’D BE PERFECT IF YOU WERE CONFIDENT

**Nishinoya:** WAIT I ALREADY THINK YOU’RE PERFECT SO DON’T GET IT TWISTED

**Nishinoya:** BUT I MEAN YOU HAVE NO REASON TO NOT BE CONFIDENT BECAUSE YOU ARE PERFECT

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI I DIDN’T MEAN IT PLEASE YOU'RE SO PERFECT

**Asahi:** Noya omg

**Sugawara:** I think Daichi would be a good prince

**Sugawara:** He’s a great leader, friendly, approachable, handsome, strong, just the sweetest guy ever. He’s literally so dreamy

**Tsukishima:** Okay

**Sugawara:** He’d look great in a prince costume

**Sugawara:** Daichi is literally so considerate too

**Sugawara:** He’s great with kids! And he loves animals

**Tsukishima:** We get it omg STOP

**Sugawara:** Don’t ever use all caps with me Tsukishima Kei

**Sugawara:** You’d be a horrible prince

**Sugawara:** You only talk to be mean to me!

**Sugawara:** Yamaguchi is a much better prince!

**Yamaguchi:** Aw, you think so?

**Sugawara:** YES OMG YOU'D BE SO CUTE

**Tsukishima:** I’m weirdly offended

**Sugawara:** Good

**Kuroo:** Okay sure Daichi is all that

**Kuroo:** But I’m the best prince here

**Kenma:** No

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Kenma:** You’re not the best prince omg you’d be terrible

**Kenma:** Sure you’d look good but like

**Kenma:** But like what else??

**Kenma:** You’d pick unnecessary fights 

**Kuroo:** KENMA YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME CRY

**Kenma:** Sorry 

**Kenma:** i guess it really does suck to suck 😿

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Bokuto:** WHAT ABOUT ME AKAASHI 

**Akaashi:** You want me to be honest?

**Bokuto:** YES PLEASE

**Akaashi:** You’re very handsome and friendly

**Bokuto:** YOU ARE TOO

**Akaashi:** lmao thanks

**Akaashi:** However

**Bokuto:** OH NO

**Akaashi:** You wouldn’t listen to anything anyone tells you

**Akaashi:** If I were ever in danger, you’d blame yourself so I’d have to find a way to get you back on track while my life is basically in shambles

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** So no, you wouldn’t be a good prince

**Bokuto:** NOOO

**Akaashi:** But, you’d be a wonderful one if I’m the princess

**Bokuto:** WELL WHO ELSE WOULD BE THE PRINCESS

**Akaashi:** Idk what if it's an arranged marriage and the princess is someone else?

**Bokuto:** THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE AKAASHI IT ALWAYS HAS TO BE YOU

**Akaashi:** But what if I’m poor and you can’t marry me because it does nothing for the kingdom

**Bokuto:** THAT DOESN’T MATTER AKAASHI YOU’RE ALWAYS GONNA BE THE PRINCESS

**Bokuto:** YOU SAID SO YOURSELF. I WOULDN’T LISTEN TO ANYONE. SO IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT THEY TELL ME

**Oikawa:** Okay what is happening

**Oikawa:** It’s cute but like

**Oikawa:** You guys are going so hard lmaoooo

**Akaashi:** Lmao idk but Bokuto is so sweet omg

**Bokuto:** I JUST LOVE YOU SO MUCH AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** lol i love you just as much💘

**Bokuto:** AHHHHHH NOW I LOVE YOU EVEN MORE

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan would be a good prince!!

**Iwaizumi:** I wouldn’t

**Iwaizumi:** You’re definitely more of a prince than me

**Oikawa:** ?

**Iwaizumi:** ?

**Oikawa:** ?????

**Oikawa:** omg OMG IM GONNA HUG YOU

**Iwaizumi:** okay? Lmao you don’t have to tell me

**Kuroo:** I HATE ALL OF YOU WHY CANT I BE A PRINCE

**Kenma:** Because I said so

**Kuroo:** KENMA BABY

**Lev:** YAKU???

**Yaku:** Don’t ask questions you don’t want to know the answer to

**Lev:** 💔

**Kiyoko:** I would just like to say

**Kiyoko:** Tanaka would get shit done as a prince

**Kiyoko:** The moment I need help, he’d be there

**Kiyoko:** Actually, I don’t think I’d ever be in danger if that were the case

**Kiyoko:** And even though he’s really playful, he knows when to be serious

**Tanka:** ACJHFBSDJ

**Nishinoya:** THE NEXT TIME I SEE YOU, YOU BETTER BE MARRIED

**Kiyoko:** lmaoooo

**Tanka:** I CANNOT BREAHTBJRESC

**Sugawara:** HAHA

**Atsumu:** Well, I’d be awesome as a prince

**Osamu:** I see you more as like

**Osamu:** the sidekick character

**Atsumu:** WTF NO

**Osamu:** it’s perfect because I’m the prince and you’re my sidekick

**Atsumu:** WHY ARE YOU THE PRINCE

**Osamu:** Because I can be???

**Atsumu:** WE’RE IN DIFFERENT UNIVERSES THEN I DONT WANT TO BE YOUR SIDEKICK

**Osamu:** Fine then. Don’t come crawling back to me when you find out that your universe sucks ass

**Kita:** please stop this is such a stupid argument

**Atsumu:** TELL HIM THAT I WOULD BE A PRINCE

**Kita:** I think you both would be great as princes

**Kita:** you’re twins so you can probably share the throne right?

**Kita:** Well, in my head you guys can

**Kita:** WAIT STOP THIS IS NOT A SERIOUS CONVERSATION WHAT

**Oikawa:** HAHAHA WHAT IS HAPPENING ANYMORE

**Kenma:** Monarchy brain rot

**Kuroo:** EXCEPT FOR ME I GUESS

**Kenma:** FINE KURO YOU'RE A PRINCE

**Kuroo:** It’s not genuine 😭

**Kenma:** You’d be a prince because you’re good looking and funny and you put others before yourself

**Kuroo:** FINALLY THANK YOU AND YOURE THE PRINCESS

**Kenma:** I’m not

**Kuroo:** ???

**Kenma:** I’m lazy and would do a horrible job at representing my people

**Kuroo:** THEN I DONT WANT TO BE A PRINCE

**Kenma:** Too late

**Kuroo:** KENMA

-

**Sugawara:** um

**Sugawara:** So i think I have to share this experience

**Sugawara:** Daichi let me top

**Asahi:** Does he know you’re telling me?

**Daichi:** yes!

**Sugawara:** 10/10 for fun

**Sugawara:** 10/10 for Daichi being hot

**Sugawara:** 10/10 for awkwardness. I felt a little out of place

**Sugawara:** 10/10 for I’d rather be bottoming 

**Sugawara:** 10/10 for only doing it if Daichi asked

**Daichi:** 10/10 for fun

**Daichi:** 10/10 for Suga being literally the cutest top ever

**Daichi:** 10/10 for nervous Suga

**Daichi:** um 10/10 for me preferring topping

**Oikawa:** And this is in the group because???

**Sugawara:** oops lmao

**Sugawara:** Because I thought this was a groupchat with me, Daichi and Asahi

**Daichi:** Omg I did too

**Asahi:** lmaooo so did I

**Sugawara:** friendship goals 🤗

**Daichi:** sorry everyone!

**Atsumu:** You guys have a sex rubric?

**Sugawara:** mentally, yes

**Daichi:** Is that not normal?

**Atsumu:** I mean, personally, I just make a mental note if I enjoyed something or not

**Atsumu:** I don’t have like, a grading system

**Daichi:** We don’t do letter grades

**Oikawa:** That’s not the point

**Sugawara:** Well it’s important that we acknowledge why we like and dislike things

**Sugawara:** Because if I didn’t I’d be into everything

**Sugawara:** Because sex with Daichi is never bad

**Daichi:** Thank you!

**Sugawara:** of course

**Atsumu:** I’m just gonna

**Atsumu:** go to sleep

**Atsumu:** Maybe then I won’t think about this conversation

**Oikawa:** HAHAHH GO TO SLEEP YOU TWO ARE BEING STUPID 

**Oikawa:** PEOPLE ARE GONNA WAKE UP TO THIS CONVO

**Sugawara:** Well

**Sugawara:** you’re welcome everyone

**Daichi:** Lmaooo we should sleep

**Asahi:** Noya is gonna scream about it❤️ 

**Asahi:** Goodnight guys 

**Sugawara:** Goodnight 💘💗

**-**

**Akaashi** changed the group name to  _ Dying🥰 _

**Kenma:** What?

**Akaashi:** I just STARED 

**Akaashi:** At the barista

**Akaashi:** WHILE IN THE DRIVE THRU

**Akaashi:** As I sipped my coffee

**Akaashi:** I didn’t realize she was talking to me until Konoha said something

**Kenma:** oh no oh no oh no oh no

**Akaashi:** He hasn’t stopped laughing and we got to my place like 40 minutes ago

**Sugawara:** THATS SO AWKWARD WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HER

**Akaashi:** I was just like “Omg was I staring? Sorry sometimes I just forget that I’m real”

**Kenma:** THAT SOUNDS MORE AWKWARD THAN JUST LAUGHING AND APOLOGIZING WHAT

**Akaashi:** IT’S FINE GOODBYE IM GONNA DRINK ALL OF THE SHAMPOO AND CONDITIONER I HAVE

**Sugawara:** STOP HAHAHA ITS FINE SHE PROBABLY THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY

**Akaashi:** GUESS I’LL FIND OUT WHEN I MEET HER IN THE AFTERLIFE

**Kenma:** SHUT UP

**Kenma:** ITS NOT THAT BAD

**Akaashi:** I STARED AT THE WOMAN AS SHE ASKED WHAT MY PLANS WERE

**Akaashi:** NO REPLY NO EXPRESSION JUST

**Akaashi:** 👁🥤👁

**Kenma:** AHAHHA STOP STOP

**Sugawara:** AKAASHI HOW DID THAT HAPPEN 

**Akaashi:** I’m convinced it didn’t happen 

**Akaashi:** omg I’m so embarrassed

**Akaashi:** I need Bokuto to comfort me but he’s studying and I tell him to put his phone in another room while he studies

**Akaashi:** It’s fine it’s fine I’ll just beat the shit out of Konoha

**Kenma:** HAHAHA DONT

**Akaashi:** It’s fine I’ll just do it

**Kenma:** STOP AHHAHA


	115. i just want to sleep all day and not wake up for like maybe two weeks so I'm writing this so I can forget that I exist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: I HATE ANYONE WHO CAN PLAY AN INSTRUMENT  
> Kenma: Except you, Kageyama

_ Dying🥰 _

**Yamaguchi** changed the group name to  _ Memories Go Brrrrr _

**Kuroo:** Wut

**Yamaguchi:** I’m reminiscing 

**Sugawara:** Awwww cute!! I want to reminisce too 

**Sugawara:** What are we reminiscing 

**Yamaguchi:** When me and Tsukki started dating!!

**Yamaguchi:** _ attached image _

**Yamaguchi:** This is the first picture we took together after we got together!! Look how embarrassed he looks!

**Sugawara:** Awww!! So cute

**Daichi:** AWW

**Yamaguchi:** Omg throwback to when Tsukki told his mom we were dating over a text!!

**Tsukishima:** Shut up Tadashi

**Sugawara:** TSUKISHIMA KEI WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT BEING SO RUDE 

**Tsukishima:** Idc idc your words mean nothing to me Sugawara

**Sugawara:** EXCUSE ME

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki you’re so mean!!

**Yamaguchi:** But anyways do you guys wanna know what he said?

**Sugawara:** Probably something stupid.

**Yamaguchi:** ‘just letting you know tht me and tadasgi are datinbg’

**Oikawa:** TADASGI???

**Yamaguchi:** YES

**Kenma:** Mmm. It’s the remix

**Kuroo:** LMAO

**Kageyama:** Tadasgi??

**Kageyama:** Kei you can’t even spell your boyfriend’s name right??

**Kageyama:** Nice going, idiot

**Tsukishima:** IT WAS YEARS AGO TOBIO SHUT THE FUCK UP

**Sugawara:** Tsukishima I can’t help but think you deserve this

**Tsukishima:** Shut up

**Sugawara:** 😟 woah there

**Sugawara:** You’re not allowed to come over on Wednesday 😠

**Tsukishima:** Fine idc

**Sugawara:** WOW

**Iwaizumi:** What’s Wednesday?

**Sugawara:** Tsukishima comes over every Wednesday to have lunch with me!! Sometimes we study together too

**Sugawara:** BUT YOU’RE BEING MEAN SO YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO STEP A FOOT INTO MY APARTMENT

**Tsukishima:** Whatever

-

**Sugawara** and  **Tsukishima**

**Tsukishima:** Wait you weren’t being serious right

**Sugawara:** Are you too embarrassed to ask in the groupchat?

**Tsukishima:** Shut up

**Tsukishima:** You weren’t being serious right

**Tsukishima:** Because I didn’t mean it

**Tsukishima:** Your words don’t mean nothing to me they actually mean everything to me, I promise

**Sugawara:** TSUKISHIMA AW

**Sugawara:** Of course I wasn’t being serious! I knew you were joking!

**Sugawara:** We should get coffee after we eat on Wednesday because I have to study!

**Tsukishima:** For what? If it’s math again I can help

**Sugawara:** It is!!! Yay!!!!!

**Tsukishima:** !!

\--

**Hinata:** Tobio is being so cute today!!!!!!

**Oikawa:** Ew

**Oikawa:** The first groupchat notification of the day and it’s about Tobio. Disgusting

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up lol

**Hinata:** SHUT UP 

**Hinata:** HE’S BEING SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** What is he doing???

**Hinata:** HE’S PRACTICING PIANO

**Oikawa:** WAIT WAIT HE PLAYS PIANO???

**Hinata:** Yeah!!

**Hinata:** My mom bought Natsu a keyboard because she wants to learn to play and he offered to show her??? I DIDN’T KNOW HE PLAYED AT ALL

**Hinata:** he says he’s not that good but hE’S LYING

**Hinata:** It’s so cute when he messes up he looks so concentrated and his eyebrows get all furrowed AND IT’S SO CUTE

**Hinata:** HE LOOKS LIKE THIS  (￣ヘ￣)

**Bokuto:** OMG WAIT

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI DOES THAT WHEN HE’S PRACTICING CELLO AND MESSES UP

**Sugawara:** UM????

**Sugawara:** AKAASHI PLAYS CELLO????!?!?!?!?!

**Bokuto:** YES

**Akaashi:** Ahhhh

**Akaashi:** I’m not that good, I just play it casually

**Bokuto:** UMMM??

**Bokuto:** YOU JOINED AN ORCHESTRA LAST YEAR AS A HOBBY AND GOT SECOND CHAIR?!?!?!??!

**Akaashi:** Yeah so I’m not that good

**Bokuto:** AHHHHH?!?!?!?

**Akaashi:** Second chair doesn’t get the solos sooooo

**Bokuto:** KEIJI

**Oikawa:** Akaashi that’s literally impressive, you’re just competitive and bitter

**Akaashi:** Um anyways

**Akaashi:** I didn’t know Kageyama played piano! 

**Akaashi:** Kageyama come play piano with me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Sugawara:** AKAASHI YOU PLAY PIANO?!?!?!?!?

**Akaashi:** Yes

**Kita:** Atsumu plays piano too

**Kita:** So does Osamu I guess

**Osamu:** YOU GUESS?? I’M LITERALLY BETTER THAN HIM

**Atsumu:** No ur not

**Osamu:** Yeah because when you quit the piano lessons mom made us go to and I kept going to them you just really got so much better than me

**Atsumu:** SHUT UP

**Kita:** It’s cute lol when he was at my house he played piano for me

**Kita:** I have a video

**Kita:** _ attached video _

**Sugawara:** WTF WTF WTF

**Sugawara:** ATSUMU YOU’RE SO GOOD

**Osamu:** I’m better

**Akaashi:** I don’t doubt that

**Akaashi:** Atsumu keeps hitting the wrong notes lol and that’s a really easy piece. Kita I think you’re too easily impressed

**Kita:** That’s true

**Atsumu:** KITA AND AKAASHI????!!!!

**Atsumu:** EXCUSE ME???

**Atsumu:** SORRY, I DIDN’T REALIZE THIS GROUPCHAT WAS FULL OF CLASSICAL MUSIC SNOBS

**Akaashi:** It’s not. You just suck

**Kenma:** You can’t say it’s not when you’re literally such a snob about instruments

**Akaashi:** Shut up

**Kenma:** No

**Kenma:** You play a million things and you’re so good at all of them

**Kenma:** AND WHEN I TRIED TO PLAY VIOLIN A FEW WEEKS AGO YOU TOLD ME I SUCKED AND THAT YOU NEVER WANTED TO HEAR ME TRY EVER AGAIN

**Akaashi:** Well??? You sounded terrible

**Kenma:** YOU’RE SO MEAN

**Kuroo:** AHAHAH I REMEMBER THAT

**Kuroo:** KENMA WAS CONCENTRATING SO HARD AND AKAASHI LOOKED LITERALLY DISGUSTED 

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA AKAASHI WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN

**Akaashi:** I’m not!!! I let him play my violin!!!

**Kenma:** YOU CALLED IT CHARITY WORK

**Akaashi:** That’s because it was ☺️

**Kenma:** I HATE YOU

**Kenma:** I HATE ANYONE WHO CAN PLAY AN INSTRUMENT

**Kenma:** Except you, Kageyama

**Kageyama:** Awww thanks

**Kageyama:** And Akaashi lol I’m not very good, I only know the basics

**Akaashi:** That’s okay!! I won’t judge!! Piano is difficult to learn! And I can always teach you more if you want! :-)

**Kenma:** AKAASHI YOU’RE HORRIBLE

**Kenma:** I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU DON’T TEACH PEOPLE INSTRUMENTS

**Akaashi:** Kageyama is the only exception <3 

**Kageyama:** <3

**Hinata:** AHHHH

**Bokuto:** AHHHHHH


	116. She be in here but like soon she'll be IN HERE in here also I'm really craving a pleated skirt but I'm so SCARED

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akaashi: KENMA YOU BITCH YOU DRANK MY COFFEE
> 
> Kenma: well you weren’t drinking it
> 
> Akaashi: BOKUTO BOUGHT IT FOR ME 

_ Memories Go Brrrrr _

**Kiyoko:** Thinking about how Tanaka asked me to marry him in high school

**Sugawara:** I was embarrassed

**Tanaka:** That’s why me and kinoshita became friends lmaooo

**Tanaka:** That was my way of asserting dominance

**Daichi:** Shut up

**Tanaka:** okay sorry

**Kiyoko:** It was so cute

**Tanaka:** It was not

**Tanaka:** you said no

**Kiyoko:** You weren’t serious

**Kiyoko:** And we were so young lmao

**Tanaka:** Well we’re older now

**Kiyoko:** Yes

**Tanaka:** MARRY ME

**Kiyoko:** Nope

**Tanaka:** KIYOKO WHYYYY

**Kiyoko:** That wasn’t romantic at all

**Tanaka:** BUT I LOVE YOU

**Kiyoko:** And I love you too

**Kiyoko:** But no

**Tanaka:** AH

**Nishinoya:** I BELIEVE IN YOU BRO

**Nishinoya:** OMG YOU GUYS ARE DATING OMGOMG

**Kiyoko:** ?

**Nishinoya:** YOURE DATING AHHH YOURE DATING AHHHH

**Sugawara:** SHUT UP HAHAH

**Kiyoko:** OMG ALSO GUYS

**Kiyoko:** Ryuu is growing his hair out a little more so I can dye it

**Kiyoko:** Should we dye pink flames on him

**Tanaka:** !!!

**Sugawara:** WHY IS THAT EVEN A QUESTION JUST DO IT OMGOMG

**Tanaka:** And if we don’t like it I’ll just go all pink!

**Asahi:** “if we don’t like it”

**Tanaka:** Well Kiyoko has to look at me a lot so that’s more important

**Asahi:** We’re literally on a team with you

**Tanaka:** oh shit somehow i forgot

**Asahi:** lmaooo

**Asahi:** also, it should be important if you like it lol

**Tanaka:** I’LL LIKE IT IF KIYOKO DOES

**Kiyoko:** I think you’ll look good either way

**Tanaka:** AHHH THANK YOU

**Kiyoko:** lmao 

**Akaashi:** Ooh I wanna see once you guys do it!

**Kiyoko:** It’ll probably be the only thing I talk about forever so of course!

**Akaashi:** lmaooo

**Akaashi:** I’m excited!

-

**Bokuto:** I think Akaashi is kinda mad at me

**Daichi:** What happened?

**Bokuto:** I don’t really know

**Bokuto:** But he hasn’t talked to me all day

**Bokuto:** I at least want to know if he’s okay

**Bokuto:** oh

**Bokuto:** He opened my snap twenty minutes ago

**Bokuto:** A lot can happen in twenty minutes!

**Daichi:** Suga is on the phone with him right now

**Bokuto:** Okay! As long as he’s okay!

**Daichi:** Akaashi doesn’t seem like the type to just get mad over small things

**Bokuto:** I know! That’s why I’m worried

**Bokuto:** I don’t think I did anything wrong

**Bokuto:** And I like triple checked my calendar to make sure I didn’t miss an important date

**Bokuto:** But also I’m good with dates! Especially when it comes to Akaashi so i don’t think it’s that

**Daichi:** Maybe he just needs some time?

**Bokuto:** Maybe :-(

**-**

**Bokuto:** AHH IM GOING CRAZY HE DOESN’T LET ME WALK HIM TO CLASS

**Kageyama:** he told you no??

**Bokuto:** No but I’ll be at the usual spot and he’ll tell me to go ahead

**Bokuto:** :-((( it’s been like this for four days :-(((

**Kageyama:** Have you asked him if he’s okay?

**Bokuto:** He just says he’s fine

**Bokuto:** He’s barely talking to me

**Bokuto:** And whenever I go over to his place he’s just texting someone 

**Bokuto:** ugh

**Kageyama:** I hope everything is alright!

**Bokuto:** I’m so lonely

**Kageyama:** You can always talk to me! :-)

**Bokuto:** AW THANK YOU SO MUCH

**Bokuto:** DO YOU WANT TO FACETIME LATER

**Bokuto:** IF AKAASHI IS BUSY

**Kageyama:** Hinata is coming over but he’ll be excited to talk to you! So yes!

**Bokuto:** YAY

**Kuroo:** FACETIME ME KAGEYAMA

**Atsumu:** FACETIME ME KAGEYAMA

**Kita:** FACETIME ME KAGEYAMA

**Atsumu:** WTF

**Kita:** wdym wtf

**Atsumu:** WTF DONT FACETIME HIM

**Atsumu:** YOU’LL FALL FOR HIS ANGRY CHARM

**Kita:** Shut up

**Kageyama:** Shut up Atsumu

-

**Kuroo:** omg

**Kuroo:** Bokuto is so sad

**Kuroo:** he’s here

**Kuroo:** we’re on FaceTime with Tobio

**Kuroo:** and he’s so sad

**Kuroo:** and KENMA ISN’T MAKINF IT BETTER

**Kuroo:** HES SITTINF HERE TEXTING AKAASHI AND RUBBING IT IN HIS FACE

**Kenma:** he asked if I talked to Akaashi recently and I said yes

**Kuroo:** BUT HES VULNERABLE AND YOU KNOW TJAT BABE

**Kenma:** I was being honest lmaooo

**Bokuto:** it’s okay it’s okay

**Bokuto:** I just miss him

**Bokuto:** I haven’t talked to him in 8 days and this morning I left early and picked up some coffee

**Bokuto:** and I was gonna get him an iced coffee and give it to him before his class

**Daichi:** shouldn’t you have been in class?

**Bokuto:** no I just walk him there and then wait for him to be done to walk with him home and we eat lunch and then I leave

**Bokuto:** and I thought he’d feel better if I brought him coffee when he wasn’t expecting it

**Bokuto:** but then he showed up with Haruki

**Bokuto:** so then I just left with two coffees

**Kenma:** Is that the coffee you gave me?

**Bokuto:** yes

**Akaashi:** KENMA YOU BITCH YOU DRANK MY COFFEE

**Kenma:** well you weren’t drinking it

**Akaashi:** BOKUTO BOUGHT IT FOR ME 

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI OMG ARE YOU OKAY

**Akaashi:** I want that coffee

**Bokuto:** I’LL BUY YOU ONE RIGHT NOW

**Akaashi:** no

**Bokuto:** oh

**Bokuto:** sorry

**Akaashi:** just walk with me to class tomorrow and we can get coffee together

**Bokuto:** REALLY?!?

**Akaashi:** Yes

**Kageyama:** is everything okay Akaashi? Bokuto was so worried

**Akaashi:** yes, I was just being dumb

**Kenma:** lmao

**Kuroo:** WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING BOKUTO IS LITERALLY CRYING RN

**Akaashi:** is he really? Bokuto you can come over if you’d like?

**Bokuto:** OKAY YAY

**Sugawara:** lmao I guess that didn’t work out

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI IM ON MY WAY OMG OMG

**Akaashi:** I’m never doing that again

**Kuroo:** WHAT

**Akaashi:** IT WAS KENMA AND SUGAS IDEA

**Sugawara:** It was a suggestion!

**Sugawara:** And I said it doesn’t work for everyone!

**Daichi:** oh no

**Bokuto:** IM CONFUSED BUT I'M WAY TOO HAPPY RN!!!!

**Akaashi:** AHHH OMG

**Akaashi:** I wanted to try the thing

**Akaashi:** like make him mad so we fuck and he’s like rough

**Akaashi:** But I ended up making him sad and I feel horrible

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI JUST ASK NEXT TIME PLEASE DONT IGNORE ME

**Bokuto:** I WAS SO WORRIED

**Akaashi:** I’m sorry Bokuto

**Bokuto:** it’s okay!!! I’ll be there soon! 

**Kenma:** Akaashi you’re weak

**Akaashi:** EVERY MORNING HE WOULD WALK TO THE COFFEE SHOP ALONE

**Akaashi:** AND HE DIDNT NEED TO GET UP THAT EARLY AT ALL UGH

**Akaashi:** I love my boyfriend so much and I’ll never do that again omg

**Akaashi:** I wouldn’t reply and he still texted me good morning and goodnight texts ughhh he’s the best and I love him more than anything

**Sugawara:** well

**Sugawara:** Daichi usually reacts differently

**Daichi:** I’m naturally an angry person😚

**Sugawara:** 😚

-

**Sugawara** added  **Akaashi, Oikawa, Nishinoya, Kiyoko, Hinata, Kenma, Kita, Yaku, Yamaguchi, Kunimi** to a group

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ Phatty _

**Oikawa:** Suga

**Sugawara:** Oikawa

**Oikawa:** What is the meaning of this?

**Sugawara:** So I saw a tik tok

**Sugawara:** Where like you call your boyfriend daddy to see how they react

**Sugawara:** So I mean perfect for me and Daichi

**Sugawara:** So why not involve everyone

**Oikawa:** Don’t you already do that?

**Sugawara:** Yeah but like it’s different like you just call them it randomly 

**Kiyoko:** I see

**Kiyoko** left the group

**Sugawara** added  **Kiyoko** to the group

**Kiyoko:** I don’t belong here

**Sugawara:** ???

**Kiyoko:** ???

**Kunimi:** Pegging?

**Kiyoko:** No lmao

**Akaashi:** So what I’m hearing is you belong here

**Kiyoko:** omg

**Hinata:** I’m scared omg

**Kenma:** Don’t be, just do it

**Yaku:** Omf ImDATING LEV HES GONNA BE SO WEIRD ABOUT IT AND THEN I WILL HAVE TO KICK HIS ASS

**Kita:** Atsumu 🙃

**Sugawara:** So we’re doing this???

**Kenma:** Yes

**Sugawara:** Maybe I’m using this as an excuse to fuck

**Akaashi:** oops oops 

-

**Kiyoko** and  **Tanaka**

**Kiyoko:** Are you busy tonight?

**Tanaka:** Nope! Do you need anything?

**Kiyoko:** No

**Kiyoko:** I just want to see you daddy

**Tanaka:** Me?

**Kiyoko:** Of course!

**Tanaka:** WAIT OF COURSE IT'S ME KIYOKO PLEASE TELL ME YOURE TALKING TO ME

**Kiyoko:** Who else would it be? I’m literally texting you lmaooo 

**Tanaka:** IM OMW KIYOKO OMW OMW OMW

**-**

**Kunimi** and  **Kindaichi**

**Kunimi:** Hey

**Kunimi:** Hey

**Kunimi:** Kindaichi

**Kunimi:** Yuutarou

**Kunimi:** omg

**Kunimi:** Yuu

**Kunimi:** 😠

**Kunimi:** 🙃 you always reply so quick but today of all days you can’t text me back 🙃

**Kunimi:** Daddy

**Kunimi:** are you busy or something? 

**Kunimi:** This is supposed to be like a thing but now I actually want attention and you aren’t here

**Kindaichi:** Sorry Akira!!!

**Kindaichi:** My phone was updating so when it turned back on I got all the notifications

**Kunimi:** It’s okay I guess

**Kindaichi:** you guess???

**Kunimi:** Whatever, you’re no fun and this was stupid

**Kindaichi:** WAIT I JUST SCROLLED UP

**Kindaichi:** YOU CALLED ME DADDY WHAT???

**Kunimi:** Why are you asking me, can’t you read

**Kindaichi:** I THOUGHT IT WAS SOMEONE ELSE 

**Kunimi:** I’m sorry what

**Kunimi:** Yuutarou who the fuck else is calling you daddy

**Kindaichi:** NO ONE BABY I SWEAR I JUST DIDN’T EXPECT YOU TO SAY IT

**Kunimi:** Well I’m never saying it again so it’s okay

**Kindaichi:** WHAT

**Kunimi:** We’re breaking up so it’s okay

**Kindaichi:** WHAT STOP NO WE AREN'T

**Kunimi:** It’s okay

**Kindaichi:** Lmaooo shut up and just come over

**Kunimi:** Why

**Kindaichi:** Because I want to see you?? Do I need a reason to see my boyfriend?

**Kunimi:** Well why don’t you just ask the other person that calls you daddy to come over

**Kindaichi:** omg just come over

**Kunimi:** lol I’m almost there 😋

**Kindaichi:** 💕

**Kunimi:** 💕

-

**Yaku** and  **Lev**

**Yaku:** Hey

**Lev:** YAKU NO WAY

**Lev:** I was just about to facetime you haha

**Yaku:** lmao really? What for?

**Lev:** Just because I miss you!

**Yaku:** Aww ❤️ you just saw me a practice though

**Lev:** and I miss you already

**Yaku:** I’m not doing anything so you can just come over if you want

**Lev:** I’m so tired though 😭

**Yaku:** Please daddy? I thought you missed me

**Lev:** ?

**Lev:** ????

**Lev:** ??????

**Lev:** !!!!!!!!!!!

**Lev:** YAKU I’M RUNNING

**Yaku:** Just be careful lol

-

**Hinata** and  **Kageyama**

**Hinata:** Yamayama

**Kageyama:** yes

**Hinata:** Can you do me a huge favor???

**Kageyama:** It depends 

**Hinata:** Can you bring me a redbull on your way over 🥺

**Kageyama:** No

**Hinata:** please yamayama!!

**Kageyama:** It’s so late and you need to sleep tonight 

**Hinata:** I just really want one!!

**Kageyama:** No, idiot

**Hinata:** Daddy you’re always so mean to me

**Kageyama:** I’m not being mean, I just want you to sleep.

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA CAN’T YOU REACT A LITTLE???

**Kageyama:** It doesn’t matter how horny you make me, stupid. I’m not buying you a redbull. I’m here btw

**Hinata:** YOURE NOT EVEN EMBARRASSED

**Hinata:** ARE YOU CRAZY OR SOMETHING IM SO EMBARRASSED OMG

**Kageyama:** COME OPEN THE DOOR OMG

**-**

**Yamaguchi** and  **Tsukishima**

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki Tsukki Tsukki

**Yamaguchi:** I miss youuu

**Tsukishima:** I miss you too

**Tsukishima:** You should have come with me to Akiteru’s place. It’s just house sitting anyways

**Yamaguchi:** I wanted to but I have so much homework

**Tsukishima:** I would have done it for you.

**Yamaguchi:** Nooo I have to do it

**Tsukishima:** your loss

**Yamaguchi:** I know 😔

**Yamaguchi:** I just wish you were here daddy

_ Incoming call from  _ **Tsukki 🌙💛**

-

**Kita** and  **Atsumu**

**Kita:** tsumu

**Atsumu:** I thought samu was texting me wtf

**Kita:** ?

**Atsumu:** he’s like the only one that calls me that lmao

**Kita:** ohhh lol

**Kita:** It’s cute

**Kita:** I want to call you something else

**Atsumu:** THIS IS MY MOMENT

**Atsumu:** CALL ME DREAMBOAT

**Kita:** lmaooo no

**Atsumu:** HEART THROB?

**Atsumu:** HONEY?

**Atsumu:** LOVE?

**Atsumu:** SOULMATE?

**Atsumu:** PRINCE? KING?

**Kita:** daddy

**Atsumu:** That one isn’t very cute

**Kita:** omg

**Atsumu:** I thought we were going for ✨💗 not 🥵😈

**Kita:** I hate you lmaooo

**Atsumu:** You just called me daddy so you clearly don’t hate me

**Atsumu:** Kita?

**Atsumu:** Where’d you go baby???

**Atsumu:** Come back!

**Atsumu:** Call me daddy again

_ Facetime from  _ **Atsumu🤢 💗💘**

**-**

**Akaashi** and  **Bokuto**

**Akaashi:** Are you asleep?

**Bokuto:** omg I was just thinking about you!!

**Bokuto:** Well I’m always thinking about you lol

**Bokuto:** Why aren’t you sleeping Akaashi? It’s so late

**Akaashi:** Lol I could ask you the same thing

**Bokuto:** I already told you! I was thinking about you

**Bokuto:** I’m kinda embarrassed that I said that haha

**Akaashi:** ahh you’re so cute

**Bokuto:** Wait!! You have to tell me why you’re not asleep yet!

**Akaashi:** I’m just playing with makeup and new outfits and stuff

**Akaashi:** Idk I want to have like a little photoshoot

**Bokuto:** Oooh! Like for instagram??? I can’t wait to see them!!!

**Akaashi:** I was thinking about just sending them to you

**Bokuto:** SEND THEM!!!! I bet you look so beautiful Akaashi!!

**Akaashi:** _ Attached Image _

**Bokuto:** New skirt!!!

**Akaashi:** Yup

**Bokuto:** And you repainted your nails!

**Bokuto:** Your makeup looks beautiful baby!

**Bokuto:** My boyfriend is so beautiful!!

**Akaashi:** awww thank you 💘

**Bokuto:** 💘

**Akaashi:** _ Attached Image _

**Bokuto:** PUT YOUR SKIRT DOWN AKSVBAH

**Akaashi:** Bokuto I already took the picture lol

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI YOURE SO HOT OMG

**Akaashi:** Thank you daddy

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI

**Bokuto:** IWANT TO SEE YOU 

**Bokuto:** IM COMING OVERRI GHT NOW OMG 

**-**

**Nishinoya** and  **Asahi**

**Nishinoya:** Asahi

**Asahi:** Yes

**Nishinoya:** Are you still coming over??

**Asahi:** Yes! Sorry, I just got off! If you’re tired I can just come over tomorrow instead

**Nishinoya:** I’m not tired!

**Nishinoya:** I’ve been waiting for you all day daddy

**Asahi:** Noya

**Asahi:** ???

**Nishinoya:** What?

**Asahi:** You called me daddy

**Asahi:** Wait

**Asahi:** So like

**Asahi:** You’ve been waiting all day

**Asahi:** Or like, you’ve been WAITING all day??

**Nishinoya:** _ Attached Image _

**Asahi:** OMG MY SHIRT

**Asahi:** I’LL BE THERE SOON!!

-

_ Phatty _

**Kenma:** _ Attached Video _

**Kenma:** I just called him daddy when I asked him to plug my switch in

**Kiyoko:** Aw he blushed so much

**Sugawara:** For some reason I didn’t imagine he’d be shy about it

**Kenma:** Yeah lol he was so flustered

**Kenma:** I think it was because I’ve never called him that before and like, it surprised him

**Yamaguchi:** That's kinda cute what

**Oikawa:** _ Attached Video _

**Oikawa:** He was taking long in the shower so I just asked if he was almost done

**Oikawa:** At first he was defensive but then I think it like

**Oikawa:** finally hit him that I called him daddy lol

**Oikawa:** Then I got to 😉 take a shower with Iwa-chan 🥵

**Hinata:** tHEY WAY YOU WERE JUST LAUGHING AT HIM

**Yaku:** HE SOUNDED SO CONFUSED 

**Oikawa:** He’s so cute lmao

**Oikawa:** Alright Suga

**Oikawa:** The moment we’ve all waited for

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** 😋

**Akaashi:** Daichi didn’t even hesitate

**Sugawara:** He’s probably used to it 

**Kunimi:** YOU MADE THIS VIDEO SO LONG SUGA LIKE I WANT TO STOP WATCHING BUT I CANT

**Oikawa:** WHY DIDN’T YOU STOP HIM EARLIER

**Oikawa:** THE WAY HE CALLS YOU BABY IS SO DIFFERENT WHEN HE’S HORNY

**Sugawara:** The man has some range 🥰

**Hinata:** THIS IS SO INTIMATE

**Sugawara:** It’s not like we fucked in the video

**Hinata:** YOU DID VERBALLY

**Akaashi:** Daichi just omg he just says “Are you gonna be a good boy for me?”

**Akaashi:** I’m so like

**Akaashi:** He just

**Akaashi:** you like

**Akaashi:** IDK THIS FEELS LIKE SOMETHING I SHOULDN’T HAVE WATCHED

**Kenma:** RIGHT LIKE IT WAS ONLY FOR THEM

**Sugawara:** grow up

**Nishinoya:** OMFGOMFGOMFG I AM TAKING FLIGHT

**Nishinoya:** HORNY DAICHI AND SUGA LIKE HOW AMAZING IS THAT

**Oikawa:** You’re both freaks

**Sugawara:** Anyways, I’m expecting screenshots of everyone else's experiences!


	117. I was the one who had it all. I was the master of my fate. I never needed anybody in my life. I LEARNT THE TRUTH... TOO LATE. I'LL NEVER SHAKE AWAY THE PAIN. I CLOSE MY EYES BUT SHE'S STILL THERE. I LET HER STEAL INTO MY MELONCHOLY HEART, IT'S MORE THAN I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: He screamed lmao
> 
> Sugawara: AHAHAH
> 
> Kuroo: KENMA YOU WEREN’T EVEN THERE
> 
> Kenma: We r connected telepathically bby

**Akaashi** changed the group name to  _ Hello I’m Suffering As Always🥰 _

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI AKAASHI WHAT HAPPENED????

**Akaashi:** I changed my major again 🥰

**Kenma:** Omfg

**Kenma:** I’M SORRY

**Kenma:** I DIDN’T MEAN TO RUIN YOUR LFIE

**Sugawara:** What did you change it to?

**Akaashi:** It’s back to what it was before because architecture made me miserable 🥰

**Nishinoya:** That’s alright!! You just wanted to see if changing it would make you happier and it didn’t! It’s okay! You’re still figuring things out!

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI?

**Bokuto:** I didn’t even know you were thinking about doing that

**Akaashi:** Yeah

**Akaashi:** I wanted to die in all my classes for it but I told myself I was being dramatic and repressed it a bit

**Sugawara:** So what changed?

**Akaashi:** KENMA RUINED IT

**Kenma:** I’M SORRY

**Kuroo:** Oh god, Kitten, what did you do?

**Hinata:** His name is Kenma

**Kuroo:** To you

**Kenma:** To you

**Kenma:** Anyways

**Kenma:** I started talking about how excited I was for one of my programming classes 

**Kenma:** And how I’ve been looking into internships already and stuff

**Kenma:** And Akaashi’s soul just

**Kenma:** Left his body and he just stared off out the window for a solid five minutes and then turned back to me and was like “I HATE WHAT I’M STUDYING”

**Kenma:** He said it so loud and so suddenly that it surprised me tbh

**Akaashi:** I’M SO INDECISIVE

**Akaashi:** It’s driving me insane tbh

**Akaashi:** But it’s so difficult because I don’t know what I want to do FOREVER because I literally don’t want to do anything

**Sugawara:** That’s okay!

**Nishinoya:** That’s how I feel! And that’s totally okay! It’s a scary decision because of how permanent it feels 

**Nishinoya:** But that’s normal

**Nishinoya:** I think

**Nishinoya:** I HOPE

**Nishinoya:** I kind of want to drop out because like

**Nishinoya:** What I want to do doesn’t really need an education but like 

**Nishinoya:** SCARY

**Akaashi:** AHHHH

**Nishinoya:** AHHHHH

**Asahi:** That’s perfectly normal, you two

**Asahi:** Just like what Yuu said, it’s a scary thing

**Asahi:** You guys are going to be fine!!!

**Akaashi:** Asahi I’m in love with you

**Akaashi:** AND YOU NISHINOYA I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU TOO

**Nishinoya:** WE’RE IN LOVE WITH YOU TOO AKAASHI

**\--**

**Kuroo:** I jusT SAW A SNAKE

**Kuroo:** RIGHT OUTSIDE MY APARTMENT

**Kuroo:** I ALMOST STEPPED ON IT AND IT SCARED ME SO BAD

**Kenma:** He screamed lmao

**Sugawara:** AHAHAH

**Kuroo:** KENMA YOU WEREN’T EVEN THERE

**Kenma:** We r connected telepathically bby

**Kuroo:** …

**Kenma:** ….

**Kenma:** So did you scream?

**Kuroo:** THAT’S BESIDE THE POINT KENMA

**Kuroo:** Anyways I followed it and then I blinked and it was gone and I got scared because what if it somehow went up my pants so I ran inside

**Oikawa:** Why the fuck would it be up your pants?

**Kuroo:** IT COULD HAVE GONE UP MY PANT LEGS

**Oikawa:** YOU WOULD HAVE FELT IT

**Kuroo:** AHHHH

**Kenma:** Idiot

**Daichi:** I hope you didn’t try to touch it.

**Daichi:** It could have been dangerous.

**Kuroo:** Daichi I’m not an idiot

**Daichi:** Good.

**Kuroo:** Say good boy, daddy 🥵

**Daichi:** No

**Sugawara:** KUROO DO YOU WANT TO DIE

**Sugawara:** I’m his good boy, not you 😡

**Oikawa:** SCARY

**Hinata:** Ummm

**Kuroo:** I’M A GOOD BOY I’M A GOOD BOY

**Kenma:** KURO AHAHA

**Kenma:** i didn’t know you wanted to be called that

**Kuroo:** UMMM

**Kuroo:** I DON’T

**Kuroo:** JOKES JOKES JOKES I WAS JUST KIDDING

**Kenma:** Hm

**Kuroo:** WHAT DOES THAT MEAN

**Hinata:** 😟

**-**

**Kenma:** _ attached video _

**Kenma:** So I called Kuro a good boy

**Hinata:** UH

**Hinata:** DID YOU HAVE TO SEND SUCH A SCARY VIDEO?

**Hinata:** YOU COULD HAVE JUST LIKE TOLD US ABOUT IT

**Hinata:** WE DIDN’T NEED TO SEE IT

**Kenma:** ???

**Kenma:** What do you mean? That’s not scary

**Oikawa:** Kenma I’m literally terrified

**Oikawa:** Like

**Oikawa:** I SHOULDN’T BE HERE?

**Oikawa:** WHY COULDN’T YOU HAVE CALLED HIM A GOOD BOY WHILE DOING SOMETHING NORMAL

**Kenma:** THIS IS NORMAL???

**Oikawa:** I MEAN LIKE

**Oikawa:** WITH THE DADDY THING WHEN YOU ASKED HIM TO PLUG IN YOUR SWITCH

**Oikawa:** LIKE THAT

**Oikawa:** You just had to send a video of YOU TWO IN THE MIDDLE OF FUCKING

**Kenma:** Hey

**Kenma:** We weren’t fucking

**Kenma:** I wouldn’t be on my phone for that

**Hinata:** YOU TWO ARE SCARY

**Daichi:** Um???

**Daichi:** Why is he angry?

**Kenma:** Idk but don’t ask🤤🤤🤤

**Hinata:** AHHHHH

**Nishinoya:** Wait what’s happening the video won’t play???

**Nishinoya:** THIS ISN’T FAIR I WANT TO SEE IT

**Oikawa:** YOU DON’T

**Nishinoya:** I DO

**Hinata:** AHHHH

**Hinata:** Kuroo like

**Hinata:** Ahhhh

**Hinata:** Pulled his hair so he called him a good boy

**Hinata:** AND THEN HE SAYS IN LIKE A REALLY SCARY AND LOW VOICE

**Hinata:** “don’t call me that”

**Sugawara:** *don’t call me that, Kitten

**Hinata:** I’m not typing that word

**Hinata:** ANYWAYS

**Hinata:** AND THEN HE PULLED HIS HAIR REALLY HARD 

**Hinata:** LIKE HARD ENOUGH TO PULL HIS HEAD BACK REALLY HARSHLY

**Hinata:** AND THEN THE VIDEO JUST CUTS OFF

**Oikawa:** SO ABRUPTLY 

**Akaashi:** The fact that you actually just typed that out

**Akaashi:** Anyways. NICE KENMA

**Oikawa:** I’M SO SO SCARED

**Kenma:** NO DON’T BE IDIOTS

**Kenma:** IT’S NOT SCARY

**Kenma:** HE JUST

**Kenma:** FUCKED MY FACE A BIT 

**Oikawa:** A BIT?

**Kenma:** YES

**Kenma:** IT MADE HIM START BEING SO ROUGH WITH ME

**Sugawara:** NICE

**Nishinoya:** NICE

**Akaashi:** NICE

**Hinata:** NOT NICE NOT NICE

**Nishinoya:** YES NICE YES NICE

**Nishinoya:** KUROO FUCKS KUROO FUCKS

**\--**

**Oikawa:** Hmmm

**Oikawa:** Thinking about Iwa-chan’s first kiss 🥰

**Kageyama:** ...Why?

**Hinata:** WHY?!

**Iwaizumi:** My kiss with Kageyama?

**Atsumu:** What

**Atsumu:** WAIT 

**Atsumu:** HEY MAN THAT USED TO MAKE ME MAD

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Atsumu:** When I started dating Kageyama I was SO PISSED OFF LOL

**Atsumu:** Because he was my first kiss and his was FUCKING IWAIZUMI

**Iwaizumi:** Excuse me

**Atsumu:** No offense 

**Oikawa:** I’M GLAD SOMEONE UNDERSTANDS ME

**Oikawa:** But that’s not the first kiss I’m talking about 🥰

**Oikawa:** I’ve decided that that one doesn’t count because it was an accident, so I’m thinking about his REAL first kiss

**Iwaizumi:** With Osamu

**Osamu:** 😏

**Oikawa:** I’ve decided that that one doesn’t count because I said so. So I’m thinking about his REAL first kiss

**Iwaizumi:** With Kunimi

**Kunimi:** UM

**Kunimi:** HEY???

**Kunimi:** I THOUGHT WE WERE ALL SWORN TO SECRECY WITH THAT

**Kindaichi:** I FORGOT THAT HAPPENED WTF

**Kindaichi:** I still have the video

**Kunimi:** DO SECRETS MEAN NOTHING TO YOU TWO??!

**Kindaichi:** _ attached video _

**Oikawa:** OKAY WHAT THE FUCK

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN DID YOU KISS EVERYONE IN THE WORLD EXCEPT ME???

**Oikawa:** I WAS JUST SILENTLY SUFFERING BECAUSE OF HOW IN LOVE WITH YOU I WAS?? AND YOU WERE JUST OUT KISSING EVERYONE??

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan cheated on me THREE TIMES

**Kunimi:** He kissed Kindaichi, Hanamaki, and Matsukawa too

**Kunimi:** _ attached video _

**Kindaichi:** THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SECRET

**Kunimi:** That sucks, doesn’t it? ☺️

**Oikawa:** WHAT THE FUCK

**Oikawa:** SO HE CHEATED ON ME SIX TIMES

**Iwaizumi:** STOP SAYING THAT IDIOT

**Oikawa:** WHY WERE YOU KISSING THE ENTIRE TEAM??

**Iwaizumi:** WE WERE PLAYING SPIN THE BOTTLE IDK WHAT YOU WANT

**Oikawa:** WHY WERE YOU PLAYING IT WITH THE ENTIRE TEAM

**Iwaizumi:** IT WASN’T THE ENTIRE TEAM, IDIOT

**Oikawa:** I WAS TRYING TO THINK ABOUT YOU KISSING ME FOR THE FIRST TIME

**Oikawa:** AND YOU ALL JUST HAD TO REMIND ME THAT IWAIZUMI HAJIME HATES MY GUTS

**Sugawara:** Awww Oikawa, wait I want to hear about your first kiss with Iwaizumi!

**Oikawa:** WELL I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT ANYMORE

**Sugawara:** OIKAWA

**Oikawa:** NO

**Iwaizumi:** I asked him out, but didn’t kiss him until our second date. I took him out to dinner, and then we went to an ice cream shop for dessert and then after that I kissed him

**Iwaizumi:** It started snowing while we were inside and when we got outside we stood on the balcony of the shop and Oikawa was just looking up at the sky like he was so amazed

**Iwaizumi:** He does that every first snow, and he has since we were kids and it’s always been my favorite thing

**Iwaizumi:** So he was just looking up at the snow and he had that same expression on his face that he gets every time

**Iwaizumi:** Where his eyebrows go up a little and he scrunches his nose and his smile is so soft and small

**Iwaizumi:** And it was so cute so I kissed him because I couldn’t help it

**Iwaizumi:** He tasted like strawberries 

**Oikawa:** AND YOU TASTED LIKE CHOCOLATE AND IT MADE MY KNEES WEAK AND I HATE YOU SO MUCH

**Oikawa:** YOU MADE ME WAIT UNTIL OUR SECOND DATE BUT KUNIMI BLINKS AT YOU AND YOU KISS HIM

**Oikawa:** KAGEYAMA SAYS HELLO TO YOU AND YOU KISS HIM

**Oikawa:** KINDAICHI AND MATTSUN AND MAKKI JUST🧍‍♂️AND YOU KISS THEM

**Oikawa:** OSAMU

**Oikawa:** AND YOU KISS HIM

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up. You’re such an idiot

**Iwaizumi:** I waited with you because I wanted it to be special because this is the only relationship I’ve ever had that I didn’t want to mess up

**Osamu:** Sick

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up

**Osamu:** You shut up

**Oikawa:** OSAMU DON’T GET OFFENDED 

**Osamu:** WTF I’M NOT OFFENDED

**Osamu:** WE BROKE UP BECAUSE HE WAS IN LOVE WITH YOU, YOU IDIOT. I ALREADY KNEW ABOUT ALL OF THIS

**Oikawa:** WTF

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN YOU WERE IN LOVE WITH ME?

**Iwaizumi:** YES IDIOT I’VE BEEN IN LOVE WITH YOU FOR MOST OF MY STUPID LIFE

**Iwaizumi:** I DIDN’T THINK I NEEDED TO TELL YOU THAT

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHANNNN

**Sugawara:** OIKAWA YOU’RE SO STUPID

**Oikawa:** SHUT UP

**Daichi:** Let’s stop screaming

**Sugawara:** Sorry daddy 😋


	118. College is making me want to puke all over my family but it’s fine I’m chillin but not also I rewatched Kakegurui and that shit is so good NOT MY COUSIN CALLING DIBS AS COSPLAYING RYOUTA LIKE GIRL NO ONE IS GONNA FIGHT YOU FOR A KAKEGURUI GUY ROLE WHAT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: ooh that’s what we call 🌷❤️ top panic❤️🌷

_ Hello I’m Suffering As Always🥰 _

**Yamaguchi:** I CANNOT BREATHE

**Hinata:** HSAHAHA

**Oikawa:** I want to be included!! What happened?

**Kageyama:** Kei is being dramatic

**Tsukishima:** I’M NOT BEING DRAMATIC

**Sugawara:** Oh god what did you do

**Tsukishima:** I need to get my foot cut off

**Yamaguchi:** YOU DONT HAHAHAH

**Kageyama:** Omg so me and Hinata were hanging out

**Tsukishima:** HANGING OUT???

**Tsukishima:** MY FOOT SAYS OTHERWISE

**Kageyama:** IM EXPLAINING IT IDIOT SHUT UP

**Kageyama:** And then Yamaguchi and Tsukki knock on the door

**Kageyama:** Literally right after me and Hinata are done fucking

**Hinata:** Looking at Tsukki right after you fuck is not what I wanted to do

**Hinata:** i wanted to take a nap with you Kageyama

**Kageyama:** Me too

**Kageyama:** But then I remembered that they both have a key and like I told them once that you can just come in and wait whenever I’m not home

**Kageyama:** So me and Hinata were rushing to like, look decent

**Kageyama:** And I threw the condom in the trash can by my bed

**Kageyama:** But I guess I missed it because it landed right next to it

**Kageyama:** And Kei ended up stepping on it when he went to sit on my bed

**Kageyama:** He’s been in my bathroom washing his foot since

**Sugawara:** OMG

**Oikawa:** I would be doing the same thing

**Yamaguchi:** So dramatic

**Tsukishima:** YOU’RE JUST SITTING IN THEIR BED LIKE THEY DIDN’T JUST FUCK

**Yamaguchi:** I’m just sitting here, it’s not like I’m licking the sheets

**Yamaguchi:** And hinata wanted to take a nap so he wanted to cuddle

**Tsukishima:** Disgusting

**Kageyama:** Would you hurry up and get out of the bathroom

**Sugawara:** Instead of rushing, Kageyama you should have just told them to wait

**Kageyama:** Kei won’t listen

**Yamaguchi:** Very true

**Kageyama:** So maybe this is a lesson for him

**Tsukishima:** I hate you and I’m never coming over again

**Yamaguchi:** My boyfriend is so dramatic

**Kunimi:** I have decided that I’m in love with Yamaguchi

**Kunimi:** He’s the cutest in the chat

**Oikawa:** Okay but what about me

**Kunimi:** I would say Kageyama is second but Kindaichi has a crush on him

**Kindaichi:** HAD A CRUSH ON HIM OMG

**Oikawa:** Okay but what about me

**Kageyama:** Aw lol

**Yamaguchi:** Ah Kunimi is really cute too

**Kunimi:** Stop that because I will leave Kindaichi for you

**Kindaichi:** …

**Kunimi:** Jokes teehee

**Hinata:** tsukki is out of the bathroom finally

**Hinata:** he’s sitting at Kageyama’s desk though 

**Oikawa:** OKAY BUT WHAT ABOUT ME

-

**Osamu** changed the group name to  _ Atsumu HATE club _

**_Atsumu_ ** _ changed the group name to LOVE Atsumu club _

**Osamu:** Tsumu doesn’t know his starbucks order

**Hinata:** grow up

**Oikawa:** grow up

**Atsumu:** SHUT UP

**Nishinoya:** You’ve been alive for how long? And starbucks has been around for how long?

**Nishinoya:** You have no excuse

**Atsumu:** It’s not my fault the menu is huge

**Kageyama:** Omg that was so annoying

**Kageyama:** He’d always complain when I’d bring him a green tea instead of a matcha latte

**Kageyama:** When he ASKED FOR A GREEN TEA

**Atsumu:** YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN

**Kageyama:** IT'S YOUR ORDER YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN

**Atsumu:** I HATE EVERYONE HERE

**Oikawa:** Good

-

**Yamaguchi:** Kunimi

**Kunimi:** Yamaguchi

**Yamaguchi:** I’m single now

**Kunimi:** this is my moment

**Hinata:** ????

**Sugawara:** Omg what???

**Hinata:** You’re not serious are you?

**Yamaguchi:** I was gonna kiss Tsukki because he’s so handsome and I’m so in love with him

**Yamaguchi:** AND HE TOLD ME NO

**Kageyama:** What?? Why???

**Yamaguchi:** Apparently he hates when I wear lipgloss!!!

**Tsukishima:** I don’t hate it

**Yamaguchi:** YOU TOLD ME NOT TO KISS YOU BECAUSE I WAS WEARING LIPGLOSS

**Tsukishima:** Because it’s so sticky

**Daichi:** You’re not a real man

**Tsukishima:** omg

**Sugawara:** Daichi would never

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan would never

**Kenma:** Kuro would never

**Nishinoya:** Asahi would never

**Kiyoko:** Tanaka would never

**Hinata:** Kageyama would never

**Tsukishima:** I get it

**Akaashi:** Bokuto would never

**Kita:** Atsumu would never

**Osamu:** Suna isn’t here but I would never

**Kunimi:** Kindaichi would never

**Tsukishima:** OKAY I GET IT

**Kunimi:** yamaguchi we can be a throuple

**Tsukishima:** Stop

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi omg

**Tsukishima:** You can kiss me

**Tsukishima:** Just not on the cheek when you have lipgloss on

**Sugawara:** Just let him kiss you wherever he wants!!

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki if you hate me, just say it

**Tsukishima:** I don’t hate you

**Yamaguchi:** It’s fine, I’ll be out of your hair soon

**Tsukishima:** I just didn’t want you to kiss my cheek

**Yamaguchi:** _ Attached Image _

**Yamaguchi:** look at him just laying here and hating me

**Kuroo:** Omg he just has his head in your lap

**Yamaguchi:** just frowning at his phone lmao

**Tsukishima:** Suga is spamming me on snap

**Tsukishima:** So is Daichi

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi would you just kiss me so they stop

**Yamaguchi:** Oh so now you want to kiss me

**Tsukishima:** omg

-

**Kageyama:** Hinata looks so cute omg

**Kageyama:** HES SO CUTE

**Kageyama:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** AHHH DONT SEND PICS

**Kageyama:** NO EVERYONE HAS TO SEE HOW CUTE YOU LOOK

**Kenma:** Hinata in a heart apron Hinata in a heart apron

**Kageyama:** HE WANTED TO BAKE SOMETHINF SO I WAS JUST GONNA LET HIM BORROW MINE AND THEN HE PULLED THIS OUT OF HIS BAG

**Oikawa:** I bought it for him HAHAH

**Hinata:** lmaooo

**Kageyama:** THANK YOU OIKAWA OMG

**Sugawara:** this is such a new Kageyama lmao

**Hinata:** We made cupcakes so we’ll be dropping some off to you guys soon!

**Iwaizumi:** aw thank you

**Daichi:** Can’t wait🥰🥰

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI TSUKKI

**Tsukishima:** lmao

**Bokuto:** Damn this long distance friendship

**Hinata:** we can mail you cookies!!

**Bokuto:** ILL CRY

**Kuroo:** ME AND KENMA TOO PLEASE!

**Kageyama:** yes of course!

**Kenma:** Yay!!

**Hinata:** yay!!!

**Kunimi:** Ah kindaichi is tearing up

**Kindaichi:** STOP

**Kunimi:** “Kageyama made us cupcakes 😭”

**Kunimi:** I think my boyfriend is still in love with you Tobio

**Kindaichi:** I WAS NEVER IN LOVE WITH HIM OMG

**Kindaichi:** AND STOP TELLING PEOPLE EMBARRASSING THINGS ABOUT ME

**Kunimi:** No I have to show everyone the power I have over you

**Hinata:** sounds scary

**Kunimi:** See you guys when you get here!!

**-**

**Sugawara:** I had so much school work last week

**Bokuto:** me too and I wanted to dieee

**Sugawara:** right?

**Sugawara:** So I’m taking a break!

**Daichi:** you deserve one!

**Sugawara:** I’m not doing any homework this week

**Daichi:** Suga what

**Sugawara:** it’s my break

**Daichi:** I can help you do some! Just give me the ones you hate the most

**Sugawara:** tempting but I want to spend my break with you

**Daichi:** how about we do your homework together and take breaks together

**Daichi:** we’ll get it done super fast and it’ll be fun

**Sugawara:** Before I agree to this

**Sugawara:** did you do all your work?

**Daichi:** Yup!

**Sugawara:** okay good, I cant have my Daichi slacking off

**Daichi:** and I can’t have my Koushi slacking off either lol

**Sugawara:** let's do it then! I’ll be there soon 😚

**Daichi:** 😚

**Oikawa:** 🤢🤢 keep this shit to yourselves next time

**Sugawara:** I think you’re jealous

**Oikawa:** jealous that you’re drowning in work?

**Sugawara:** jealous that my Daichi is just the best

**Oikawa:** iwa-Chan is the best! So it’s impossible to be jealous

**Sugawara:** okay 

**Oikawa:** he’s the sweetest and he’s a gentleman

**Oikawa:** and he’s so attractive

**Sugawara:** okay

**Oikawa:** SUGAWARA KOUSHI SHUT UP

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN NEVER DOES MY HOMEWORK

**Iwaizumi:** I didn’t pay for that class

**Oikawa:** CANT YOU BE LIKE DAICHI AND HELP ME

**Iwaizumi:** I’m not as whipped as him

**Bokuto:** “as whipped” meaning you’re whipped a little

**Iwaizumi:** whipped enough to help him but not whipped enough to do it for him

**Iwaizumi:** I usually wouldn’t admit it but everyone in this group is whipped as fuck

**Kuroo:** Daichi being like 

**Kuroo:** I can’t have you slacking off 😓😓😓

**Kuroo:** baby boy I’ll do your homework😍😍😍😍

**Kuroo:** that's such a contradiction

**Bokuto:** lmaoooo

**Iwaizumi:** yeah wtf Daichi

**Daichi:** It’s rare for Suga to be so stressed when it comes to school so of course I’ll help him

**Sugawara:** Daichi I’m here!

**Daichi:** the door is unlocked baby

**Sugawara:** stop bullying Daichi!

**Sugawara:** he’s just being nice! I’m sure he’d help you guys like this too

**Oikawa:** he wouldn’t

**Daichi:** I wouldn’t

**Kuroo:** LMAOOO

**Sugawara:** Daichi I’m trying to help you out

**Daichi:** Suga lol they literally all saw the conversation we had when I told you that even if you used me I’d still be with you because I love you that much

**Daichi:** It’s okay though! I’d do anything for you

**Sugawara:** even help me fake my death and get a new identity and start over

**Daichi:** okay maybe it depends on the circumstances

**Sugawara:** I just want to make sure my boyfriend isn’t a complete idiot 🥰 

**Sugawara:** well anyways

**Sugawara:** leave Daichi alone! Especially you Kuroo. You’d do anything Kenma asked. You’d clean the house with your teeth if he wanted you to

**Kuroo:** No, I stand my ground!

**Kenma:** Kuro, bring me a blanket

**Kenma:** and my chips

**Kuroo:** okay kitten!!

**Kenma:** lol

**Sugawara:** See!!

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan can’t we have that???

**Iwaizumi:** no because YOU will get way too comfortable with it and never do anything yourself

**Oikawa:** ITS MY SUPERIORITY COMPLEX

**Iwaizumi:** EXACTLY

**Oikawa:** omg

**Bokuto:** um

**Bokuto:** before anyone calls me out I would like to say that Akaashi is my only reason for being here

**Bokuto:** And by that I mean not only in this group chat but in this universe

**Bokuto:** I only exist to exist with him

**Akaashi:** that’s sweet💘

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI I LOVE YOU

**Kuroo:** omg that’s what it is omg

**Kuroo:** ITS A MIND GAME

**Kuroo:** YOU GUYS MAKE US LIKE THIS

**Kuroo:** WE DO THINGS FOR YOU AND YOU PRAISE US

**Kuroo:** WE LIKE MAKING YOU GUYS HAPPY SO WE KEEP DOING WHATEVER YOU WANT

**Sugawara:** it’s called 💫💖bottom charm💖💫

**Sugawara:** but I guess Oikawa is lacking recently in the bottom scholar department

**Oikawa:** (◞‸◟)

**Sugawara:** it’s alright Oikawa! You make up for it in every other part!

**Oikawa:** maybe terushima will do some of my homework ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

**Kuroo:** he definitely will

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t even think about it Tooru

**Kenma:** first name 😳😳

**Iwaizumi:** What fucking assignments do you need me to do

**Sugawara:** ooh that’s what we call 🌷❤️ top panic❤️🌷

**Kuroo:** HAHAHAH

**Oikawa:** Come to the living room pleaseeeee

**Iwaizumi:** why can’t you just come to the bedroom

**Oikawa:** I can’t concentrate in there

**Oikawa:** especially not with my handsome iwa-Chan waiting for me so eagerly on the bed ( ╹◡╹)♡

**Iwaizumi:** omg whatever fine

**Sugawara:** and just like that his bottom charm has been restored

**Akaashi:** how beautiful

**Kuroo:** THIS IS SO TERRIFYING


	119. There's literally no transition like literally the vibes in this go from 🥵😈🤗 to me just projecting and being sad but it's okay because I will make up for it in the next one I hope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata: is the groupchat safe again?
> 
> Sugawara: ???
> 
> Kageyama: he muted it because you guys were being scary

_ LOVE Atsumu club _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** daddy look! I’m waiting just like you told me to💗💗

**Akaashi:** groupchat

**Akaashi:** but also you look lovely Suga

**Sugawara:** oh man, not again

**Sugawara:** thank you though lol

**Nishinoya:** it’s been forever since someone has sent accidental nudes😳😈

**Daichi:** you look perfect

**Sugawara:** Daichi sorry 😔 that was supposed to be your special picture

**Daichi:** not Daichi

**Sugawara:** ?

**Daichi:** daddy

**Sugawara:** sorry daddy😋

**Daichi:** it’s okay baby

**Daichi:** I’m almost at your place

**Oikawa:** TAKE THIS SHIT OUT OF THE GROUPCHAT

**Sugawara:** why?

**Sugawara:** I’m letting you experience my daddy freely

**Oikawa:** OUT OF THE GROUPCHAT. I’VE ALREADY HEARD DAICHI LIKE THIS ONCE, I DON’T NEED TO AGAIN

**Sugawara:** HAHAHAH LMAO IM JOKING 

**Daichi:** I’m not

**Sugawara:** HAHAHA

**Oikawa:** YES YOU ARE

**Sugawara:** GOODBYE EVERYONE 🥰

**Nishinoya:** NO SUGA COME BACK

-

**Nishinoya:** 😠😠

**Nishinoya:** Asahi isn’t paying attention to me!!!

**Asahi:** We’re on Facetime right now

**Asahi:** You stopped telling your story to text the group

**Tanaka:** LMAOOOOO

**Nishinoya:** Pay attention to me Asahi!!!

**Asahi:** I always pay attention to you

**Nishinoya:** That’s not enough😔😔

**Nishinoya:** can I come over?

**Asahi:** of course!!

**Nishinoya:** IM ON MY WAY ASAHI

**Tanaka:** attention whore

**Nishinoya:** 🤪🤪

**Nishinoya:** I dream about my funeral

**Asahi:** ???!!!

**Nishinoya:** when I die, all the attention will be on me😤 as it should be🤬🤬

**Asahi:** I don’t want to think about your funeral

**Asahi:** Noya why would you say that☹️

**Nishinoya:** It was just a thought Asahi

**Nishinoya:** more than a thought, it’s a dream

**Nishinoya:** we’re dying together btw. Because I don’t want to be without you

**Asahi:** ? Okay??

**Nishinoya:** but we have to have separate funerals because it’s my day

**Asahi:** Noya

**Tanaka:** How did you manage to make Asahi so sad so quick

**Nishinoya:** idk what you’re talking about but Asahi I’m here so please hug me right when I get inside

**Asahi:** okay omg

**Tanaka:** this was weird and now I’m exhausted. Goodnight!

**Asahi:** goodnight

**Nishinoya:** GOODNIGHT RYUUUUU

**-**

**Daichi:** _ Attached Video _

**Nishinoya:** OMFG

**Oikawa:** WHAT THE FUCK

**Akaashi:** Daichi

**Akaashi:** groupchat

**Daichi** left the group

**Sugawara:** HAHAH HE MEANT TO SEND THAT TO ME OOPS

**Oikawa:** why do you have these videos??

**Sugawara:** because I look cute with cum on my face

**Sugawara:** what a dumb question

**Sugawara** added  **Daichi** to the group

**Sugawara:** Don’t run away

**Daichi:** that’s embarrassing, they all just saw my dick

**Sugawara:** it’s fine!!

**Sugawara:** they won’t watch it

**Daichi:** You can tell what it is based off of the preview picture

**Sugawara:** exactly! If they watch it then they did it to themselves lol

**Daichi:** I guess

**Sugawara:** it’s fine! They’ve seen worse

**Kuroo:** very true

**Daichi:** it’s so embarrassing omg 

**Sugawara:** you’re being so shy daddy

**Oikawa:** OUT GET OUT

**Sugawara:** kink shaming 😣

**Oikawa:** IM NOT KINK SHAMING IM VOMITING IN MY MOUTH BECAUSE YOU TWO ARE SO HORNY

**Sugawara:** ITS NOT MY FAULT

**Oikawa:** IT TOTALLY IS

**Sugawara:** BLAME DAICHI

**Sugawara:** SHY DAICHI GETS ME GOING AND SO DOES DOMINANT DAICHI

**Oikawa:** YOU FUCKING FREAK

**Sugawara:** AND HE HAS TO BE DOING IT ON PURPOSE

**Kenma:** it’s his rut

**Kenma:** it’s triggering Suga’s heat

**Kenma:** ✨omegaverse✨

**Akaashi:** kenma lmaooo

**Sugawara:** HAHAH

**Oikawa:** LMAOOO GET ME OUT OF HERE

**-**

**Hinata:** is the groupchat safe again?

**Sugawara:** ???

**Kageyama:** he muted it because you guys were being scary

**Atsumu:** BAHAH

**Hinata:** I just

**Hinata:** I’ve seen so much of everyone here

**Hinata:** I needed a break

**Atsumu:** understandable

**Atsumu:** Everything felt 😳too intimate😳

**Sugawara:** SHUT UP AND YES ITS SAFE NOW ITS ALWAYS SAFE HERE

**Tsukishima:** idk the notifications I got the other day were terrifying

**Sugawara:** Daichi’s at work so he can’t even defend me😠😠

**Kageyama:** I’ll defend you!

**Sugawara;** Yes my favorite son!

**Kageyama:** it’s not scary, they’re just in love

**Sugawara:** exactly!

**Tsukishima:** amazing

**-**

**Akaashi:** I thought I’d let you all know that I’m in love with Bokuto

**Bokuto:** I’m in love with you too

**Kenma:** You’re practically forcing me to run into the busiest street that’s so cute

**Tsukishima:** we all knew this already

**Bokuto:** DONT BE MEAN AKAASHI WAS BEING CUTE

**Akaashi:** it’s alright Bokuto, he’s just jealous of our open affection

**Tsukishima:** when did everyone suddenly start coming for me

**Akaashi:** when you started coming for Suga

**Sugawara:** aw 🥰🥰

**Akaashi:** 🥰🥰

**-**

**Yamaguchi:** Ahhh um 

**Oikawa:** ???

**Oikawa:** are you alright?

**Yamaguchi:** I’m so uh

**Tsukishima:** I can tell them if you want?

**Yamaguchi:** It’s okay it’s okay I can

**Yamaguchi:** Thank you Tsukki

**Yamaguchi:** So me and Tsukki are visiting my family because like

**Yamaguchi:** My dog has been really sick lately but everyone is super busy this month with work and they had to leave so me and Tsukki said we’d watch her while they were out

**Yamaguchi:** Um she’s super old so like we’ve been preparing for a while now

**Yamaguchi:** But like I’ve had her since I was really little. Like even before me and Tsukki became friends so he knows her too. 

**Yamaguchi:** Um we just had to put her down?

**Yamaguchi:** Because her lungs were super bad and like she wasn’t eating or drinking and like she couldn’t stand on her own for more than a few minutes.

**Yamaguchi:** So me and Tsukki were the ones that took her to the vet to see if she was like okay to stay at home and yeah we just said our goodbyes to her

**Yamaguchi:** Um

**Yamaguchi:** I’ve been crying like ever since I got back home so me and Tsukki sat in the room and said our goodbyes and like

**Yamaguchi:** I didn’t even bring tissues and I was just sobbing into tsukki’s shoulder the whole ride home and now his shirt is gross lol

**Yamaguchi:** But yeah. I just wanted you guys to know

**Hinata:** I’m gonna give you the biggest hug when you get back!!!

**Kageyama:** I’m sorry Yamaguchi :-(((

**Kageyama:** And you too Tsukki, you knew her for a long time too :-((

**Yamaguchi:** Thank you guys! Tsukki is on the phone with Akiteru

**Sugawara:** Yamaguchi :-((( call us if you need anything!! Me and Daichi are gonna drop you guys some dinner 💗

**Yamaguchi:** You guys really don’t have to omg

**Daichi:** Too late, we just ordered something for you two

**Yamaguchi:** Aw thank you Daichi and Suga

**Oikawa:** That’s so sad. But I’m sure she lived a super happy life with you Yamaguchi! And a long one too  ( ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈♡)

**Yamaguchi:** (*⁰▿⁰*) Thank you! It’s sad but the doctor said it was really just her age that got to her. That was weirdly comforting…

**Kenma:** Yeah that makes sense! Me and Kuroo are far but let us know if you need help or anything

**Akaashi:** I’m sorry :-( Did you pay for the whole thing already? Let us know what you need! 💗

**Yamaguchi:** 💕

**Yamaguchi:** And Tsukki paid for it :-(

**Tsukishima:** It’s not that big of a deal.

**Yamaguchi:** You didn’t have to do that

**Tsukishima:** I wanted to. She was important to both of us

**Tsukishima:** Just as a heads up, Akiteru is crying rn so if he texts you I’m so sorry

**Yamaguchi:** Aw lol okay

**Yamaguchi:** Well, I’m gonna take a nap probably. I’ll leave the door unlocked for you Daichi and Suga. You can have dinner with us!

**Sugawara:** We’d love too! We’ll see you soon


	120. This episode is kind of scary but i haven't written a scary episode in a while and i wanted to feel somethign also wtf how do we both always write the same things lol our brains do just be so connected 💆♀️ soulmate tingz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kunimi: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
> 
> Kunimi: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

_ LOVE Atsumu club _

**Kunimi:** 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 i miss you

**Kunimi:** 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 i miss you i miss you i miss you

**Kunimi:** 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

**Akaashi:** Ummm

**Akaashi:** Group chat?

**Sugawara:** Ooooh who do we miss?

**Kunimi:** What

**Kunimi:** Oh wtf

**Kunimi:** Ew sorry Kindaichi had my phone

**Kageyama:** ….Yeah sure

**Kunimi:** Don’t ‘yeah sure’ me 

**Kunimi:** I’d never say something like that

**Oikawa:** That is true

**Iwaizumi:** Kunimi is more of a ‘😡😤i miss you’ type of guy

**Kunimi:** Exactly

**Kunimi:** Kindaichi is just being embarrassing

**Kageyama:** Yeah sure

**Kunimi:** Do you want to fight with me????

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ Kunimi😬 vs Tobio🤢 _

**Kunimi:** Okay so wait I understand Kageyama’s emoji because it’s you

**Kunimi:** But why do I have that one

**Oikawa:** Because you’re in love with Iwa-chan of course

**Kunimi:** Hm.

-

**Kunimi** and  **Kindaichi:**

**Kunimi:** Okay so that was so embarrassing 

**Kunimi:** So you’re just not going to respond?

**Kunimi:** Glad I embarrassed myself for nothing

**Kunimi:** i hate you

**Kunimi:** I’ve never missed you a day in my life

**Kunimi:** I’m not just in bed ALONE right now

**Kunimi:** I don’t just miss you 

**Kunimi:** the most 

**Kunimi:** I didn’t just get out of the shower where I was crying because I haven’t been able to see you or really talk to you all week because I’ve been so busy with school

**Kunimi:** Nope

**Kunimi:** Because if I did you obviously wouldn’t even care because you aren’t EVEN RESPONDING

-

**Kindaichi:** Shit, sorry, baby, I was helping Kageyama

**Kindaichi:** He’s moving, which is a secret so don’t tell anyone lol

**Kindaichi:** WAIT AKIRA DID YOU REALLY CRY IN THE SHOWER??

**Kindaichi:** Babyyy

**Kindaichi:** Can I come over tonight? You don’t have classes tomorrow right???

**Kunimi:** 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

**Kunimi:** 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

**Kunimi:** Please 🥺🥺🥺🥺 You have no idea how much I miss you

**Kindaichi:** Okay!

**Kindaichi:** I’m going to go to the store to bring stuff over for dinner, okay?

**Kunimi:** No wtf

**Kunimi:** Facetime me instead 😠😠😠

**Kunimi:** We can go to the store together later

**Kunimi:** I’ll even let you hold my hand 💆‍♀️

**Kindaichi:** ….Why

**Kindaichi:** Akira it would save time if I just went now

**Kunimi:** Plssss can we just go together later

**Kunimi:** It doesn’t matter if going now would save time. We aren’t in a rush

**Kindaichi:** Okay

**Kunimi:** Besides 

**Kunimi:** I miss you so much 😠😠😠😠

**Kunimi:** And you’re acting like you don’t even care 😠😠😠😠

**Kunimi:** I’m just going to die from lack of attention

**Kindaichi:** Stop being so dramatic

**Kunimi:** 😠😠😠😠😠

**Kindaichi: 😠😠😠😠😠😠**

**Kunimi: 😠😠😠😤👊👊👊**

**Kindaichi: 😠😠😠😤😤🤬🤬👊**

_ incoming FaceTime from:  _ **_Tarou_ 😡🥰❤️**

\--

_ Kunimi😬 vs Tobio🤢 _

**Hinata:** OKAY

**Hinata:** So like

**Hinata:** Tobio doesn’t like scary movies

**Sugawara:** Yeah I know

**Sugawara:** Did you not??

**Hinata:** No??

**Sugawara:** Hm

**Oikawa:** Hm. Even I knew that

**Kunimi:** Me too

**Hinata:** DON’T BULLY ME WTF

**Hinata:** I also don’t like scary movies, so I’ve never asked him to watch them with me, and you all know Tobio only talks about hating movies if he’s actively watching them

**Kenma:** He’s still ur boyfriend

**Kenma:** You’ve been dating for how long and you just didn’t know this?

**Hinata:** SHUT UP KENMA

**Hinata:** GOSH

**Hinata:** ANYWAYS

**Hinata:** Tsukishima and Yamaguchi came over to watch a movie and Yamaguchi chose and like

**Daichi:** Oh god

**Yamaguchi:** Teehee

**Hinata:** 😬

**Hinata:** Anyways

**Hinata:** They left like three hours ago

**Hinata:** AND TOBIO WON’T LET GO OF ME

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Akaashi:** Wow lol

**Akaashi:** I;m about to go feral

**Akaashi:** Kageyama 😍

**Oikawa:** THE WAY HIS FACE IS JUST BURIED IN YORU NECK 

**Oikawa:** I mean ewww Tobio

**Iwaizumi:** Awwww

**Kenma:** KAGEYAMA YOU’RE SO CUTE

**Kenma:** I’M GOING TO JUMP OUT MY WINDOW OMG

**Kuroo:** I WANT TO MARRY HIM

**Hinata:** I DON’T THINK HE’S SLEEPING BUT LIKE

**Hinata:** HE WON’T LET ME GO

**Hinata:** I’m gonna see if he’s sleeping brb

**Sugawara:** Don’t wake him if he is!!

**Hinata:** Duh

**Sugawara:** Excuse me

-

**Hinata:** Okay so update he wasn’t sleeping

**Hinata:** I asked if he was and started playing with his hair

**Hinata:** And then he started giving me little neck kisses lol

**Nishinoya:** Kageyama fucks?

**Hinata:** NO

**Hinata:** Not right noe

**Hinata:** MNow

**Hinata:** NOW

**Nishinoya:** It sounds like Kageyama fucks

**Hinata:** No

**Hinata:** He’s just being cute and cuddly 

**Nishinoya:** Kissing your neck isn’t being cute and cuddly 

**Kuroo:** Ummmmm

**Kuroo:** yes it is 🤬 My Kenma does it all the time if he wants to kiss me but doesn’t want to move

**Kuroo:** Or sometimes he’ll wake me up by just kissing my jaw or face 🥺

**Kenma:** I love you but please shut up

**Nishinoya:** Yeah, Kuroo shut up 

**Nishinoya:** Kissing your neck isn’t being cute and cuddly

**Oikawa:** Actually.. Iwa-chan cuddles me all the time and he’ll just give me neck kisses

**Oikawa:** It’s really cute

**Nishinoya:** OIKAWA SHUT UP

**Nishinoya:** I’m not repeating myself

**Nishinoya:** shouyou where’d you go

**Nishinoya:** SHOUYOU

**Sugawara:** I think we know where he went ;-)

**Nishinoya:** YESSS

**Nishinoya:** KAGEYAMA FUCKS

**Asahi:** Or they’re just going to sleep. It IS really late

**Nishinoya:** Asahi no

\--

**Kita:** I’m horny

**Sugawara:** HAHA KITA

**Sugawara:** Me too tho

**Kenma:** Sugawara you’re always horny

**Sugawara:** As I should be…

**Nishinoya:** AS HE SHOULD BE

**Kuroo:** Kitten you are too, I don’t think you can judge him

**Kenma:** I wasn’t judging

**Kenma:** Just stating a fact

**Kenma:** Call me kitten again

**Kuroo:** Kitten

**Kenma:** Again

**Kuroo:** Kitten

**Kenma:** Again

**Sugawara:** Omfg stop

**Oikawa:** Freaks

**Kita:** Um

**Kita:** Whoops lol

**Kita:** Wrong chat

**Kita:** Ignore that, it was a joke

**Tsukishima:** What kind of joke is that?

**Kita:** An inside joke lol

\--

**Kita** and  **Atsumu**

**Kita:** That was embarrassing

**Kita:** But also I don’t care rn

**Kita:** Is it okay if I send you some pictures?

**Atsumu:** Depends on what kind

**Kita:** I think you know...

**Atsumu:** Send them, baby

**Kita:** What kind should I send?

**Kita:** I like it when you tell me what to do

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** How about some in that outfit I bought you?

\--

**Kunimi:** What kind of inside joke is that?

**Kunimi:** Kita, I know a liar when I see one

**Kindaichi:** Like you lying about me sending all of those messages?

**Kunimi:** I don’t know what you’re talking about

**Yamaguchi:** I don’t think it was a joke either lol

**Kita:** Whatever you say, daddy

**Kita:** _ attached image _

**Akaashi:** Group chat, Kita

**Osamu:** Wow

**Osamu:** I’m blind

**Osamu:** But I’m glad I can’t see

**Osamu:** Because if I could I’d hate to be looking at my brother’s naked boyfriend

**Kenma:** He’s not naked… 

**Osamu:** He’s basically naked dude

**Sugawara:** Group chat

**Sugawara:** But also Kita!!! You look so cute!

**Kenma:** Suga…

**Kuroo:** Um

**Atsumu:** OMG

**Atsumu:** OMG

**Atsumu:** Guys haha

**Atsumu:** Guys look at THESE CUTE PICTURES OF ME AND KITA

**Atsumu** : _ attached image _

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**Kuroo:** ATSUMU YOU CAN’T JUST DO THIS EVERY TIME

**Atsumu:** SURE I CAN

**Atsumu:** LOOK AT MY CUTE BOYFRIEND LOL NO NEED TO SCROLL UP BECAUSE THERE’S SO MANY PICTURES WOW JUST WAY TOO MANY DON’T SCROLL UP HAHA OTHERWISE IT’LL JUST TAKE FOREVER

**Atsumu** : _ attached image _

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**Sugawara:** Hmmm

**Sugawara:** I see Kita has a daddy too 😋😋 

**Oikawa:** SUGAWARA DON’T JUST SAY THAT

**Kita:** This is so embarrassing. I’m so sorry

**Atsumu:** Haha suga…Oikawa… Kita… what r u guys talking about?? Nothing happened 

**Atsumu** : _ attached image _

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**Osamu:** Wow

**Osamu:** I am 

**Osamu:** Once again wondering how tf you managed to take that many pictures with Kita when you two literally only spent four days together

**Atsumu:** Wow

**Atsumu:** I am

**Atsumu:** Once again wondering why you think it’s necessary to give your opinion when I literally didn’t ask

**Kita:** Shut up 

**Kita:** Answer my facetime call

**Atsumu:** What’s the magic word?

**Kita:** Lmfao

**Kita:** I’m not going to plead with you to answer a call.

**Atsumu:** Kita. 

**Atsumu:** What’s the magic word, baby?

**Kita:** Please, daddy?

**Atsumu:** Good boy. 

**Oikawa:** AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

**Osamu:** EW

**Sugawara:** YESS

**Sugawara:** KITA KITA KITA WE R ONE IN THE SAME. WE LOVE TO SEE IT

**Nishinoya:** YESSS 


	121. What is this you ask? Nothing. It's literally nothing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Osamu: You’re getting what you deserve
> 
> Atsumu: I deserve to be an only child

_ Kunimi😬 vs Tobio🤢 _

**Osamu:** guys!!! Good news

**Osamu:** _Attached Image_

**Osamu:** _ Attached Image _

**Osamu:** _ Attached Image _

**Osamu:** _ Attached Image _

**Osamu:** WAIT NOT THAT LAST ONE OH NO

**Kita:** AHHH SUNA

**Atsumu:** AHHHH SUNA

**Sugawara:** SUNA😍😍😍😍

**Nishinoya:** SUNAAAAA

**Osamu:** OMG OMG IM CALLING HIM RN

**Atsumu:** ??

**Osamu:** I ACCIDENTALLY SENT HIS NUDES TO A GROUP CHAT HE HAS TO KNOW

**Nishinoya:** he looks so cute there

**Sugawara:** I WAS GONNA SAY THE SAME THING

**Osamu:** okay we’re in the clear. I apologized and he said he’ll just kill tsumu 

**Atsumu:** WHY ME TF

**Osamu:** BECAUSE YOU LOOKED AT MY BOYFRIENDS NUDES TF

**Kita:** HEY DONT LOOK AT OTHER PEOPLES NUDES WHAT THE FUCK ATSUMU

**Atsumu:** WHAT IS HAPPENING WHY AM I IN SO MUCH TROUBLE RIGHT NOW IT WAS IN THE GROUP CHAT I DIDN'T MEAN TO LOOK

**Osamu:** You’re getting what you deserve

**Atsumu:** I deserve to be an only child

**Osamu:** IS THAT A THREAT

**Atsumu:** IT IS

**Osamu:** I want to die so you’d be doing me a favor

**Atsumu:** I CHANGED MY MIND I'M DYING SO YOU CAN SUFFER ON THIS EARTH ALONE

**Kita:** :-(((

**Atsumu:** I CHANGED MY MIND AGAIN I'M NOT DYING BECAUSE KITA WILL BE SAD

**Sugawara:** you guys are so cute lol

**Atsumu:** surely you’re talking about me and Kita

**Sugawara:** I mean yes

**Sugawara:** but you and Osamu are so cute

**Osamu:** Sugawara don’t make me 🤢🤢

**Atsumu:** NO SUGA NO

**Sugawara:** you guys are just so cute like aw siblings🥰🥰

**Daichi:** lmao Suga

**Daichi:** but what were you gonna tell us Osamu

**Osamu:** Me and Suna went on a really cute date!!

**Daichi:** Oh that’s nice

**Osamu:** Yes and we made it official!!

**Atsumu:** Gross

**Osamu:** Fuck you

**Sugawara:** Were you not official before?

**Osamu:** No we were just fucking

**Osamu:** Because like I told him I liked him after we started fucking which was kinda weird so uhh bad idea on my part. We stopped for a little bit

**Osamu:** And then we started again

**Osamu:** And now we’re boyfriends!!

**Osamu:** He realized he couldn’t live without me or my dick 🥰

**Sugawara:** How sweet

**Atsumu:** How gross 🤢

**Osamu:** Fuck you

**Asahi:** Why do you think things like that are sweet

**Sugawara:** Because they are

**Asahi:** oh wow you’re right

-

**Asahi** and  **Daichi**

**Asahi:** Daichi

**Daichi:** Asahi lol

**Asahi:** I think I’m too in love

**Daichi:** Oh uhh

**Daichi:** I don’t think that’s possible 

**Asahi:** I just love Noya so much

**Asahi:** Like idk I don’t know what I’d do without him

**Asahi:** And like everything he does is just amazing to me

**Asahi:** He could like stand up and I’d be amazed

**Asahi:** And he’s so cute Daichi omg

**Asahi:** Like I swear there’s no one cuter

**Daichi:** Aw, that’s really cute lol

**Daichi:** I’m so happy for you guys

**Daichi:** Remember when you weren’t dating but everyone thought you were dating

**Daichi:** And I mean you guys practically were. Everyone knew not to go for either of you

**Daichi:** That’s actually embarrassing

**Asahi:** Okay it kinda is but you and Suga were really similar

**Daichi:** Yeah but this is about you, Asahi

**Asahi:** I should’ve talked to someone else

**Daichi:** I’m just teasing you

**Daichi:** I’m really glad you guys are together though

**Daichi:** I can’t imagine either of you with anyone else

**Asahi:** Yeah me neither lol

**Asahi:** I’m gonna cry omg I’m just thinking about Noya and how cute he is

**Asahi:** His hands are so small

**Asahi:** He hates it when I say it but I just think he’s so cute and when he gets all angry and pouty about it omgomg

**Daichi:** wtf that’s so cute omg

**Daichi:** Are you guys not together rn?

**Asahi:** No, he’s coming over later

**Asahi:** I’m so excited omg

**Daichi:** Why not just see him now? 

**Asahi:** We’re both doing stuff for school

**Asahi:** Nothing will get done if we’re together lol

**Daichi:** At least you guys know lol 

**Daichi:** Ew you guys are cute. I’m showing Suga

**Daichi:** He says hi btw

**Asahi:** I miss you guys wtf

**Daichi:** You can come over whenever you know

**Asahi:** I know I just don’t want to intrude

**Daichi:** Good call because I’d just HATE hanging out with my boyfriend and my best friend at the same time

**Asahi:** Well idk maybe you guys want alone time

**Daichi:** You’ll know when me and Suga want to be alone lmaoo

**Asahi:** Maybe me and Noya can come over tonight?

**Daichi:** Yes!!

**Daichi:** Suga’s excited lol

**Daichi:** omg look

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** He just sent me this pic of him and noya wtf they’re so cute

**Asahi:** I’m in love

**-**

**Nishinoya** and  **Tanaka**

**Nishinoya:** Broski 😍

**Tanaka:** Broski 😍

**Nishinoya:** I miss you 😠 you never pay attention to me anymore 😠

**Nishinoya:** It’s fine because you pay attention to Kiyoko instead 💗 but still 😠

**Tanaka:** No way no way I only pay attention to you broski

**Nishinoya:** Lmaoooo how are you guys anyway

**Tanaka:** AMAZING LITERALLY SO GOOD I’M LIVING MY DREAM I’M SO IN LOVE WITH HER

**Nishinoya:** YES AMAZING AMAZING THAT MAKES ME PULL MY TEETH OUT

**Tanaka:** STOP AHAHAH

**Tanaka:** How are you and Asahi?

**Nishinoya:** Perfect 🥺 he’s the best at everything he does

**Tanaka:** Everything? 😈

**Nishinoya:** He’s so 😈🥵 but omg he’s also so 💗✨🦋

**Nishinoya:** I love thinking about him omg omg

**Tanaka:** Aw omg

**Tanaka** : I love you guys being in love!!!!

**Tanaka:** I do have a question though

**Nishinoya:** I’ll answer anything for you bro!!

**Tanaka:** Okay so

**Tanaka:** Asahi is like

**Tanaka:** Huge as fuck?

**Tanaka:** And you are not as huge as he is

**Nishinoya:** Thank you for not calling me small

**Tanaka:** yes of course

**Tanaka:** i’m just a little concerned for my bro

**Tanaka:** My bestie

**Tanaka:** My bff

**Tanaka:** My rock

**Nishinoya:** What do you mean?

**Tanaka:** Like when you guys fuck

**Nishinoya:** HAHAHHA

**Nishinoya:** No no no Asahi is the best!!

**Nishinoya:** Wait why did I say that

**Tanaka:** HAHAH

**Nishinoya:** I MEAN HE LIKE

**Nishinoya:** He’s like the perfect amount of gentle!

**Nishinoya:** And idk he seems to know just what I need in the moment idk idk idk

**Nishinoya:** Asahi is so perfect for me 🐥

**Tanaka:** THE EMOJI IS SO WEIRDLY CUTE

**Nishinoya:** IT WAS AN ACCIDENT BUT IT’S FITTING

**Tanaka:** Awww

**Tanaka:** I just didn’t know you seem so like

**Tanaka:** 🤪 all the time so I just had to check on my broski

**Tanaka:** My soulmate

**Nishinoya:** Thank you!!

**Nishinoya:** I’m very 🤪 when it comes to other people lmaoooo

**Tanaka:** You deserve the same energy

**Nishinoya:** Are you saying you’ll be 🤪 for me??

**Tanaka:** YES

**-**

_ Kunimi😬 vs Tobio🤢 _

**Asahi:** Guys look at Suga and Noya here

**Asahi:** _ Attached Image _

**Nishinoya:** _ Attached Image _

**Asahi:** Noya omg 

**Nishinoya:** Aw we look cute there Suga 

**Sugawara:** AHHSHAJ NOYA OMG PERIODT

**Tanaka:** Asahi fucks Asahi fucks

**Nishinoya:** lmaooo oops

**Oikawa:** What just happened

**Daichi:** aHHAH

**Tsukishima:** Wow

**Tsukishima:** Just complete opposite pictures

**Kindaichi:** For some reason…

**Kindaichi:** I thought noya topped

**Nishinoya:** Well, I’m sorry I made you think that

**Kunimi:** Are you serious Kindaichi

**Kageyama:** What the fuck Kindaichi

**Kindaichi:** IDK HIS PERSONALITY SCREAMS TOP

**Nishinoya:** My boyfriend is a million times my size idk if I could do much 

**Sugawara:** WAIT AHHA NOYA TOPPING ASAHI AHAHAJ

**Asahi:** That makes me weirdly embarrassed

**Kunimi:** Please excuse my boyfriend he likes to ruin lives

**Kindaichi:** WTF


	122. I literally took the longest shower on accident today but she was therapeutic so everything is fine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tanaka: 🍵as fuck
> 
> Atsumu: 🍵AS FUCK
> 
> Nishinoya: 🍵!!!!!

**Oikawa** changed the group name to  _ I throw up in my mouth every time I talk to anyone here _

**Oikawa:** (・・;)

**Iwaizimi:** HAHA

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan (o_o)

**Sugawara:** OMG AHAHAH

**Oikawa:** STOP LAUGHING I NEVER WANT TO HANG OUT WITH YOU EVER AGAIN

**Sugawara:** I'M SORRY I COULDN'T HELP IT

**Oikawa:** YOU KNEW WHAT YOU WERE DOING

**Nishinoya:** 🍵

**Daichi:** 🍵 as fuck

**Oikawa:** Daichi you’re just as bad as your boyfriend!!

**Daichi:** idk what you’re talking about

**Oikawa:** maybe DONT ANSWER THE PHONE WHILE YOUR BOYFRIEND IS SUCKING YOUR DICK

**Tanaka:** 😯

**Tanaka:** 🍵as fuck

**Atsumu:** 🍵AS FUCK

**Nishinoya:** 🍵!!!!!

**Sugawara:** shut up guys the adults are talking

**Sugawara:** Oikawa

**Sugawara:** I have to satisfy my boyfriends needs

**Oikawa:** WHILE HE'S ON THE PHONE WITH ME

**Sugawara:** Well I’m not gonna tell him no

**Daichi:** I will say, I was the one that started it

**Sugawara:** thank you daichi

**Oikawa:** THEN TELL HIM TO WAIT OR BETTER YET DONT ANSWER THE PHONE UNTIL YOURE DONE

**Sugawara:** He did tell me to wait!!

**Sugawara:** and I told him no😋

**Oikawa:** TOXIC YOURE BOTH TOXIC FOR ME

**Iwaizumi:** you could’ve just texted Daichi

**Oikawa:** Well what if I wanted to hear his voice

**Sugawara:** you heard plenty

**Oikawa:** AHH

**Sugawara:** Also listen to your own boyfriends voice thanks 

**Iwaizumi:** yeah what the fuck Tooru

**Oikawa:** ARE YOU BOTH DUMB THAT WASNT SERIOUS

**Oikawa:** whenever I get a text I’m like “ew who’s texting me” and the messages sit there and rot

**Oikawa:** if I talk to him and get an answer it’s better for me( ✌︎'ω')✌︎

**Oikawa:** but now I’m throwing my phone into the fucking ocean

**Sugawara:** it wasn’t that bad

**Oikawa:** YOURE A FREAK AND I HATE YOU

**Daichi:** he had pure intentions

**Oikawa:** PURE INTENTIONS INVOLVING YOUR DICK DOWN HIS THROAT

**Sugawara:** Yes! Pure intentions because I just want to make my Daichi happy!!

**Oikawa:** you’re both terrifying and I hate you

-

**Sugawara, Daichi, Iwaizumi** and  **Oikawa**

**Sugawara:** Oikawa

**Sugawara:** I’m sorry if we made you uncomfortable!!!

**Daichi:** Sorryyyy!

**Oikawa:** I was just shocked for like the first .2 seconds

**Oikawa:** but Iwa-Chan and I were laughing about it

**Oikawa:** I was joking lol

**Oikawa:** I just wanted the groupchat to know that neither of you care about your surroundings because you’re insane. They can take it as a warning lmao

**Sugawara:** I’m just so in love so all I see is Daichi 😚

**Daichi:** 😚

**Oikawa:** you make me sick

**Iwaizumi:** the worst part is, you can’t even get them back for things like this

**Iwaizumi:** lmaooo suga will just cheer us on

**Sugawara:** true

**Daichi:** Suga you’re so cute lol

**Oikawa:** Daichi wtf

**Daichi:** are you guys still coming over?

**Sugawara:** double date double date!!!

**Oikawa:** as long as you promise not to be scary

**Sugawara:** that’s asking for too much!!

**Oikawa:** Iwa-Chan is getting ready right now then we’ll be on our way lol

**Sugawara:** double date double date double date

**Oikawa:** double date double date double date

**Daichi:** we should get ready too babe

**Sugawara:** omg I have to look good for my Tooru

**Oikawa:** SHUT UP AHAHAH GO GET READY IDIOT

**Sugawara:** It’s like I have three boyfriends🥰

**Iwaizumi:** Daichi, you’re dating the scariest of men

**Daichi:** I know, he’s so cute lol

**-**

_ I throw up in my mouth every time I talk to anyone here _

**Iwaizumi:** omg

**Oikawa:** this is omg

**Nishinoya:** more🍵?

**Iwaizumi:** 🍵 as fuck

**Nishinoya: 😳😳**

**Oikawa:** Suga and Daichi

**Oikawa:** they’re literally in their own world omg

**Iwaizumi:** like it’s a double date but literally they just

**Iwaizumi:** I feel like I’m watching some cute romance movie

**Sugawara:** AHH NO STOP SORRY SORRY

**Daichi:** we get carried away lol

**Iwaizumi:** it’s so cute

**Oikawa:** you’re just obsessed with each other omg omg 

**Daichi:** I’m embarrassed 

**Atsumu:** not embarrassed to bring your kink to the groupchat but embarrassed to be in a cute relationship 

**Daichi:** Atsumu pick your battles wisely because I’m not the only one that goes by daddy here

**Atsumu:** yes sir!!! Sorry!!

**Kuroo:** 🤤🤤

**Daichi:** Kuroo shut up

**Kuroo:** yes daddy

**Sugawara:** ew ew leave Daichi alone I’ll kill you

**Kuroo:** of course baby I’m so sorry🤗🤗

**Daichi:** Kuroo

**Kenma:** KURO AHAHAH SHUT UP

**Sugawara:** I’m just feeling extra loving recently 🥰🥰

**Daichi:** ah so cute

**Oikawa:** omg they’re just kissing each other’s cheeks wtf stop that’s cute

**Oikawa:** OMG OMG NOW IWA-CHAN IS BEING CUTE

**Iwaizumi:** shut up idiot lol let me hug you

**Kiyoko:** aw💗 what are you guys doing

**Sugawara:** we went out for dinner and now we’re just hanging out at Daichi’s place☺️

**Kiyoko:** Cuteeee!!! Have fun

**Tanaka:** Kiyoko is so sweet

**Nishinoya:** a goddess!!!!!

**-**

  
  


**Kuroo:** wait

**Kuroo:** if Kenma and I didn’t become friends

**Kuroo:** I would still be dating Daichi right now

**Kenma:** you think so?

**Sugawara:** omg I probably would’ve gotten pissed and started talking to people instead of waiting for daichi lmaooo

**Kuroo:** Kenma omg my fate is always in your hands!!!

**Kenma:** wut

**Kuroo:** you’re making all of my decisions from now on

**Kenma:** wut

**Kuroo:** omg Suga that’s making me sad nooo

**Kuroo:** you and Daichi were made for each other wtf

**Kuroo:** I changed my mind!! I would probably break up with Daichi because I’d see the heart eyes suga gives him

**Kuroo:** and I would probably date some girl or something

**Kuroo:** I’d say someone on the volleyball team but Kenma isn’t there because we never became friends therefore he wouldn’t even care about it

**Kuroo:** so I’d be stuck in the abyss of sexuality crisis

**Kenma:** Kuro are you okay

**Kuroo:** I just need my Kenma!! My kitten!!

**Kuroo:** I need you forever

**Yaku:** HES DRUNK AS FUCK KENMA IM SORRY!!!

**Yaku:** WE WERE HANGING OUT WITH NOBUYUKI AND HE WOULDN'T STOP DRINKING

**Kenma:** maybe I should’ve went after all 

**Yaku:** you should’ve!! Lev wanted to see you

**Kenma:** scary

**Kuroo:** Tell Lev no!! Kenma is mine forever

**Kenma:** you’re being embarrassing right now lmaoo

**Kuroo:** KENMA PLEASE COME HERE I WANT TO KISS YOU ON YOUR BEAUTIFUL FACE

**Kenma:** Kuro I’m sleepy

**Kuroo:** KENMA PLEASE IM GONNA DIE IF I DONT KISS YOU WHAT IF I WAKE UP AND YOURE GONE AND IM STILL DATING DAICHI

**Kuroo:** KENMA PLEASE

**Kenma:** okay lol I’m coming over

**Kenma:** wait for me and do not give Yaku or Kai a hard time

**Kenma:** Lev can choke

**Yaku:** HHAHAH

**Kenma:** okay Kuro I’m on my way

**Kuroo:** I’m gonna hug nobuyuki in the meantime!! 

**Kenma:** I don’t think he’ll want you to do that

**Kuroo:** No it’s fine!!!

**Yaku:** omg Kuroo lmaooo

**Sugawara:** lmaoo have fun and be safe everyone!!💗

**Yaku:** 💗

-

**Kenma:** good news 

**Kenma:** Kuro is awake and we’re still boyfriends

**Daichi:** thank god

**Kuroo:** Daichi wtf is that supposed to mean

**Daichi:** I can't leave my Suga ever

**Sugawara:** Aw you’re so cute 

**Kuroo:** I never want to wake up next to anyone but Kenma

**Sugawara:** If you guys had the opportunity to get back together, would you?

**Kuroo:** No

**Daichi:** Nope

**Kenma:** Really? You never think about it?

**Kuroo:** Idk if you’ve noticed

**Kuroo:** But Kenma I’m so in love with you.

**Kuroo:** And Daichi and Suga are so in love

**Daichi:** Yeah, I can’t imagine me and Kuroo back together. All I ever think about is Suga lol

**Sugawara:** Well if you guys ever get back together, me and Kenma will just date

**Oikawa:** Cute!

**Kuroo:** That is kinda cute

**Kuroo:** WAIT SUGA WTF

**Kuroo:** Stay away from my boyfriend!!

**Sugawara:** 😋

**Kenma:** lmaoo

**Kuroo:** KITTEN DON’T LAUGH AT HIM

**Daichi:** Lmaoo

**Sugawara:** Kenma is so cute

**Kenma:** Sugawara is so cute

**Sugawara:** Aw Kenma, I can call you Kitten

**Kenma:** awww that’s so cute to think of

**Kuroo:** I HATE THAT I THINK THAT’S CUTE I HATE THAT I THINK THAT’S CUTE

**Kuroo:** IT’S HARD ENOUGH COMPETING AGAINST AKAASHI

**Kenma:** You can’t come between soulmates 😻

**Kuroo:** Omg omg OMG OMG

-

**Kuroo:** I can’t stop thinking of Kenma and Suga being best friends and like

**Kuroo:** Suga doing Kenma’s hair

**Kuroo:** And Kenma like laying on him while he plays video games

**Kuroo:** And like Kenma getting super excited and planning outfits out ahead of time for when Suga visits

**Kuroo:** Like just seeing them share their food and drinks

**Kuroo:** Suga and Kenma cuddling

**Kageyama:** It’s so late Kuroo, why are you thinking of this

**Kuroo:** I want them to be best friends so bad

**Kenma:** Aw that all sounds so fun and cute lol

**Kenma:** But can we talk about this in the morning?

**Kuroo:** Yes please


	123. is this me projecting onto hinata? maybe. mind ur buisness. Also I’ve been WAITING ALL NIGHT and starbucks opens in 30 minutes omg omg 😃

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata: THE OTHER DAY I TOLD TOBIO THAT I MISS HIM???
> 
> Hinata: HE PROBABLY THINKS I’M A FREAK

_I throw up in my mouth every time I talk to anyone here_

**Hinata** changed the group name to _🙃_

 **Hinata:** Omg omg

 **Hinata:** So

 **Hinata:** I just woke uo

 **Hinata:** up

 **Hinata:** After sleeping for 2 hours 🙃

 **Hinata:** and I can’t fall back asleep 🙃

 **Hinata:** This is just amazing wow

 **Hinata:** Omg

 **Hinata:** Wait

 **Hinata:** I think the coffee shop by my apartment opens in three hours 😎

 **Hinata:** Ugh

 **Hinata:** That’s so long :-( 

**Hinata:** Why is no one awake wtf

 **Hinata:** Kenma

 **Hinata:** Kenma Kenma Kenma 

**Hinata:** Kenma where are you 🤬

 **Hinata:** You’re always up 🤬

 **Hinata:** Ugh ugh ugh

 **Hinata:** I guess I’ll just go on Tik Tok until people start waking up 😔

-

**Kenma:** Um

 **Kenma:** Shouyou wut

 **Kenma:** Why would I be awake at 4am on a Thursday

 **Hinata:** Because you’re always awake

 **Kenma:** That’s not true

 **Kuroo:** Yes it is

 **Kuroo:** Sorry Hinata I forced him to go to bed early with me yesterday 😌

 **Nishinoya:** 😏

 **Kuroo:** 😼

 **Hinata:** UM

 **Hinata:** IT’S FINE

 **Daichi:** Hinata try to take a nap or something

 **Daichi:** Or at least go to bed early tonight.

 **Daichi:** You don’t need to be staying up like this.

 **Hinata:** Ugh

 **Hinata:** Okay 

**Hinata:** I’ll tru!!!!!!

 **Hinata:** TRY!!!

 **Sugawara:** Omg

 **Sugawara:** Good

 **Oikawa:** YOU BETTER

 **Kageyama:** Oh god

—

**Hinata:** Ugh so like

 **Hinata:** The coffee place opens in four hours 🙃

 **Hinata:** I swear time is standing still right now

 **Hinata:** It’s been 3:58 for HOURS

 **Hinata:** I’m so bored

 **Hinata:** and I can‘t even bother Tobio because he’s got class in the morning and I don’t want to wake him up

 **Hinata:** He needs to sleep

 **Hinata:** 🙃🙃🙃

 **Iwaizumi:** Um 

**Iwaizumi:** Wtf

 **Iwaizumi:** Go to sleep, Hinata

 **Hinata:** Iwaizumi!! Omg!! Why are you awake????

 **Iwaizumi:** I work in 30 minutes!

 **Iwaizumi:** I’m probably going to be late though

 **Iwaizumi:** I literally couldn’t get out of bed because Tooru wouldn’t let go of me

 **Hinata:** Awww omg

 **Hinata:** Tht’s making me miss Tobio 🙃 he does that so much

 **Hinata:** Why are you working so early?

 **Iwaizumi:** I switched shifts with someone 

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru and I are spending the weekend in Tokyo

 **Iwaizumi:** So I’m working early and then after I get off we’re driving to Kuroo’s apartment

 **Hinata:** OMG

 **Hinata:** SAY HI TO KENMA FOR ME

 **Hinata:** Well I guess Kenma can read this

 **Hinata:** Or will read this

 **Hinata:** KENMA!!! HI!!!!

 **Hinata:** ANYWAYS

 **Hinata:** I hope you guys have fun!!!!!!!!!

-

**Hinata:** Omg i’m so embarrassed

 **Sugawara:** Why?

 **Oikawa:** Why?

 **Kenma:** It’s 11 in the morning, how are you already embarrassed?

 **Hinata:** Because I exist idk

 **Hinata:** EVERYTHING I DO IS EMBARRASSING

 **Hinata:** EW 

**Hinata:** THE OTHER DAY I TOLD TOBIO THAT I MISS HIM???

 **Hinata:** HE PROBABLY THINKS I’M A FREAK

 **Kageyama:** I don’t

 **Kageyama:** I literally told you that I missed you too

 **Hinata:** AHHHHH

 **Hinata:** EW I WAS SAD LAST WEEK AND TOLD HIM ABOUT IT EW EW EW 

**Kageyama:** I LITERALLY ASKED

 **Hinata:** AHHH

 **Hinata:** I’M SO EMBARRASSED

 **Sugawara:** Hinata…..

 **Nishinoya:** SHOUYOU OMG

 **Daichi:** Hinata I think maybe you should try to sleep tonight

 **Hinata:** I tried last night for three hours and gave up 😃

 **Hinata:** It started making me anxious

 **Hinata:** Ew that’s embarrassing

 **Hinata:** Why am I just talking about that

 **Hinata:** EW EW 

**Hinata:** I’M BLOCKING ALL OF YOU I HATE THAT YOU JUST PERCEIVE ME

 **Kenma:** When he knows the word perceive 🤩

 **Hinata:** WHY WOULDN’T I

 **Kenma:** BECAUSE YOU’RE STUPID

 **Hinata:** AHHHH

 **Hinata:** I’M EMBARRASSED I’M SO STUPID

 **Kenma:** No waiT SORRY I WAS JOKING

 **Kenma:** SHOUYOU COME BACK

 **Kageyama:** 🙃

 **Kuroo:** Kageyama are you CRAZY 

**Kageyama:** WHAT

 **Kuroo:** YOUR BF IS SO UNHINGED

 **Kuroo:** GO CHECK ON HIM

 **Kageyama:** I’M GOING OVER TO HIS PLACE TODAY OMG

 **Kenma:** GOOD 

-

**Hinata:** _attached image_

 **Hinata:** KENMA KENMA LOOK

 **Kenma:** Why do I have to look in the groupchat?

 **Hinata:** OH

 **Hinata:** OOPS

 **Sugawara:** IS THAT

 **Sugawara:** IS THAT TOBIO UNPACKING BOXES IN YOUR ROOM???

 **Oikawa:** OMG OMG OMG

 **Nishinoya:** I’M OGING TO JUMP OUT MY WINDOW

 **Tsukishima:** Nice going, idiot

 **Kageyama:** Leave him alone, he’s tired 😠

 **Tsukishima:** Ew

 **Sugawara:** ARE YOU GUYS MOVING IN TOGETHER???

 **Kageyama:** Yes!

 **Sugawara:** AND YOU DIDN’T TELL US???

 **Kageyama:** Lol sorry

 **Kageyama:** I didn’t want to make it a big deal

 **Kageyama:** I was gonna just unpack things and then have Shouyou invite you guys over and surprise you but like

 **Kageyama:** Guess that would be a little stupid now

 **Hinata:** Ahhhh

 **Hinata:** I’m sorry Tobio!!!

 **Kageyama:** It’s okay, baby!

 **Hinata:** I need to read the chats better!!!!!

 **Kageyama:** Lmaooo

 **Kageyama:** Shouyou you haven’t slept more than like six hours this past week 

**Kageyama:** It’s okay

 **Kageyama:** I promise

 **Hinata:** NOOOO

 **Sugawara:** WAIT HINATA

 **Sugawara:** WTF

 **Hinata:** I’VE BEEN TRYING I JUST HAVEN’T BEEN ABLE TO

 **Kita:** That happens to me sometimes? Is there something that’s keeping you up?

 **Kita:** Like for me sometimes it’s background noise

 **Kita:** No matter how quiet, it’ll just sound so loud to me and keep me awake

 **Kita:** It’s really annoying but I usually try and put on music in my headphones or something

 **Hinata:** No it’s not that

 **Hinata:** Like 

**Hinata:** idk it’s everything

 **Hinata:** Like I’ll try and sleep but I keep overthinking

 **Hinata:** Or once I stop doing that I’m trying to sleep and like my shoulders or something feel really tense and then it makes me really panicky for some reason

 **Hinata:** And if I’m not focusing on that then I can’t seem to get comfortable 

**Hinata:** And I’m just really restless

 **Hinata:** Like my body feels so heavy and tired

 **Hinata:** But I just can’t

 **Kageyama:** :-(

 **Hinata:** TOBIO NOOO

 **Hinata:** AND SINCE I HAVEN’T BEEN SLEEPING I’VE BEEN OVERTHINKING EVERYTHING

 **Hinata:** And I feel 😃horrible😃

 **Hinata:** AHHH I’M OVERSHARING

 **Hinata:** I’M EMBARRASSING

 **Hinata** has left the group

 **Kenma:** SHOUYOU NOOO

 **Kageyama:** Ahhhhhh

 **Sugawara:** Oh god 

**Sugawara:** I think I’m worried about him?

 **Kageyama:** Me too 

**Kageyama:** But it’ll be fine hopefully

 **Kageyama:** Usually when this happens it takes like a week but he’ll start sleeping more normally

 **Sugawara:** I hope so

 **Daichi:** Me too

 **Oikawa:** Me too

\--

**Oikawa:** _attached image_

 **Oikawa:** _attached image_

 **Oikawa:** Iwa-chan and Kenma are getting high together!!!!!!

 **Kuroo:** THEY’RE IGNORING US

 **Kenma:** Bc you two are annoying??

 **Oikawa:** No we aren’t!

 **Kenma:** You literally just sent two pictures of you guys pouting 

**Iwaizumi:** Yeah wtf

 **Sugawara:** AHAHAHA WTF

 **Sugawara:** That energy 😍

 **Oikawa:** Bottom energy 😍

 **Kuroo:** No ❤️

 **Nishinoya:** AHAHAHA KUROO

 **Kuroo:** KENMA PLEASE I’M SO OBSESSED WITH YOU

 **Kenma:** I can’t hear you

 **Kuroo:** KENMA KENMA KENMA

 **Kuroo:** I MISS YOU SO MUCH

 **Iwaizumi:** We’re literally in the other room

 **Kuroo:** It’s no fun when you guys are IGNORING ME

 **Oikawa:** They’re ignoring me too but ok

 **Kuroo:** No it’s just me

 **Oikawa:** So we’re fighting

 **Iwaizumi:** Omfg

 **Daichi:** Lmao you guys are so stupid

 **Nishinoya:** HAHA 

**Nishinoya:** KENMA STOP IGNORING KUROO

 **Oikawa:** I’M BEING IGNORED TOO AND NO ONE CARES???

 **Kenma:** Fine

 **Kenma:** Kuro can you come out here so I can lay on you (_ _|||)

 **Kuroo:** Shotgun kiss me and I might 😍

 **Kenma:** Ok idiot

 **Kuroo:** KENMA I’M OMW OMW 🏃

 **Kenma:** Idiot

 **Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN????

 **Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN IWA-CHAN IWA-CHAN

 **Oikawa:** (இ﹏இ`｡)

 **Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN(இ﹏இ`｡) (இ﹏இ`｡) (இ﹏இ`｡)

 **Kunimi:** You’re so needy, Oikawa

 **Oikawa:** KUNIMI THAT’S ENOUGH FROM YOU

 **Iwaizumi:** Lmaoooo

\--

**Kageyama:** GUYS

 **Kageyama:** I’m all moved in!!!

 **Sugawara:** YAY!! OMG OMG

 **Sugawara:** DAICHI DAICHI DAICHI LOOK AT OUR SON

 **Daichi:** I see him I see him!!!

 **Kageyama:** ALSO

 **Kageyama:** _attached image_

 **Kageyama:** Shouyou’s sleeping on me!!!

 **Nishinoya:** YAYAYAY

 **Oikawa:** Yes!!!

 **Sugawara:** YESS!!!!

 **Kageyama:** He looks so cute

 **Kageyama:** I’ve just been playing with his hair

 **Kageyama:** omgomg

 **Kenma:** AHHHH

 **Kenma:** I’M GOING TO JUMP OU T MY WINDOW

 **Kuroo:** SAME SAME SAME

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does anyone play animal crossing and want our friend codes? teehee


	124. So literally I'm the one that wrote this but I read "serum" as "cum" anyways YOU CALL ME UP AGAIN JUST TO BREAK ME LIKE A PROMISE so casually cruel in the name of being honest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sugawara: I know we talk about starbucks orders a lot but Daichi’s makes me horny

🙃

**Oikawa:** I got serum in my eye 😉

**Iwaizumi:** Did you rinse it out?

**Iwaizumi:** Are you okay??

**Oikawa:** I’m fine, my speedy blinks managed to save me a lot because on;y some got in

**Iwaizumi:** Well you’re typing like a manic so make you get it out

**Oikawa:** Periodt

**Iwaizumi:** Lmaoo

**Sugawara:** Iwa-chan is so caring

**Oikawa:** Booo get your own nickname

**Sugawara:** LMAOOO

**Oikawa:** Anyways

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan is so caring (◍•ᴗ•◍)❤

**Iwaizumi:** Aw that face is cute it looks like you lol

**Oikawa:** Lol I think so too

**Oikawa:** Okay now it’s all out

**Oikawa:** I cried the rest out

**Iwaizumi:** Good

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan look

**Oikawa:** _ Attached Image _

**Iwaizumi:** You look cute today 

**Iwaizumi:** You always look cute

**Oikawa:** Thank you (๑ơ ₃ ơ)♥

**Hinata:** Just sends a selfie to his boyfriend in the group chat lmao

**Iwaizumi:** So cute

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll be home soon!

**Oikawa:** I made you cookies!

**Oikawa:** tobio begged to facetime me while I made them

**Iwaizumi:** I’m sure that’s true

**Hinata:** You definitely didn’t interrupt anything when you facetimed him crying over your mixing bowl because you needed help

**Oikawa:** Okay so first things first, ew bitch

**Oikawa:** And secondly, couldn’t be me

**Kageyama:** They look like they turned out great though

**Kageyama:** You’ve gotten a lot better!

**Oikawa:** Tobio(´๑•_•๑)

**Oikawa:** Thank you

**Iwaizumi:** You’re both so cute omg

**Oikawa:** No just me Iwa-chan

**Iwaizumi:** You’re both cute but Oikawa is the cutest

**Oikawa:** I’ll accept that I guess

**Hinata:** It’s okay Kageyama, I think you’re the cutest

**Kageyama:** I wasn’t upset but thanks wtf???

**Kuroo:** I think Kageyama is the cutest too

**Hinata:** what

**Bokuto:** Me too

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Kenma:** Me too

**Hinata:** Stop?

**Akaashi:** Me too

**Hinata:** WHAT STOP

**-**

**Sugawara:** I know we talk about starbucks orders a lot but Daichi’s makes me horny

**Yaku:** Oh?

**Yaku:** What does he order?

**Sugawara:** An iced americano

**Sugawara:** Literally omg 

**Yaku:** That makes sense

**Sugawara:** RIGHT???

**Daichi:** Suga I never understand what you mean when you say that

**Sugawara:** You order a hot drink 🥰

**Sugawara:** It’s fitting

**Yaku:** Lev could never

**Lev:** WHAT YAKU

**Yaku:** Yeah I’m talking about you Mr. vanilla bean with caramel drizzle

**Yaku:** “Yaku, cold brew keeps me awake too long”

**Yaku:** Grow up

**Lev:** Yaku (⌯˃̶᷄ ﹏ ˂̶᷄⌯)

**Kenma:** Aw you made him sad

**Kenma:** Why don’t you go cry about it, you little baby

**Kenma:** Why don’t you go sit in your room with your vanilla bean frap with extra caramel and cry about it

**Lev:** Kenma (╯︵╰,)

**Akaashi:** We usually don’t go to starbucks but Bokuto’s order remains the same

**Akaashi:** Iced coffee with vanilla and an extra shot of espresso 

**Sugawara:** We’re dating MEN 

**Kenma:** Kuroo usually gets a hot coffee but sometimes he craves an iced latte

**Sugawara:** A man

**Sugawara:** It’s a good day to be dating a man

**Sugawara:** Sorry Yaku

**Lev:** SORRY YAKU I’LL KEEP DRINKING COFFEE UNTIL I START TO LIKE IT

**Yaku:** You don’t have to do that lmao

**Yaku:** I just can’t be seen in public with a giant drinking a vanilla bean frap

**Lev:** AHHHHHH YAKU PLEASE

**Yaku:** 🙃

**-**

**Sugawara:** Let's talk about when we told our significant others that we love them

**Sugawara:** I’ll start!

**Sugawara:** I said it after I sucked Daichi’s dick and leaned in for a kiss

**Daichi:** Omg Suga

**Sugawara:** It’s funny

**Daichi:** It’s embarrassing

**Akaashi:** I think I’m confused

**Sugawara:** So idk what lead up to it but it was a few months after Daichi and Kuroo broke up

**Sugawara:** I was hanging out with Daichi. Asahi left for some reason so it was just the two of us and like idk things happened and next thing I know he was cumming in my mouth

**Sugawara:** Anyways I like leaned in to kiss him and he was like 

**Sugawara:** “Suga no”

**Sugawara:** And I was obviously hurt because excuse me sir, kiss me goddammit 

**Sugawara:** And he was like “Don’t you want to kiss someone you love or at least like?”

**Sugawara:** Which would have been very cute if I didn’t just have his entire dick in my mouth

**Sugawara:** So I was like “I do love you Daichi” and ultimately I was embarrassed because like this guy just thinks I suck dick for fun and also ????? He thought we were just besties after that??? Okay lmao

**Sugawara:** And then his face got all red and he kissed me and said he loved me back

**Akaashi:** Sugawara I’m not gonna lie. The amount of times I’ve heard about you sucking his dick I’m beginning to think you do do it for fun

**Sugawara:** Okay you caught me! But only with Daichi 😋

**Akaashi:** As you should

**Akaashi:** Is Daichi alright?

**Sugawara:** He’s fine just a little embarrassed

**Daichi:** I feel like I’m dying. I’m such an idiot

**Sugawara:** It’s okay because you’re cute

**Daichi:** Suga omg

**Sugawara:** Since Akaashi is the most active, you can tell your story next

**Akaashi:** It was sorta like cliche.

**Akaashi:** Except Bokuto cried lmao

**Daichi:** Aw

**Akaashi:** Yeah. We were on a date

**Akaashi:** Well, kinda

**Akaashi:** It ended up being a team thing and we all went to the fair

**Akaashi:** We all got in line for the ferris wheel and like me and Bokuto got on together

**Akaashi:** And he was talking about how he wanted to just bring me there alone but the team heard him talking to Yukie about it and invited themselves lol

**Akaashi:** So he was already really sad that his date was ruined so I told him that I still had a lot of fun and I held his hand and then told him that I loved him so no matter what we did, I’d always have fun

**Akaashi:** And then he cried a little because he was so excited

**Akaashi:** It was really cute

**Akaashi:** After that he kept trying to drag me away from the group lol

**Akaashi:** It didn’t work but we went back the next day and had an actual date because he wanted a redo

**Sugawara:** That’s so cute wtf

**Sugawara:** Bokuto just crying on a ferris wheel

**Oikawa:** I’ve told Iwa-chan I love him so much it’s hard to remember the first time

**Sugawara:** Can we talk about Akaashi and Bokuto first?

**Oikawa:** Very cute Akaashi

**Oikawa:** Anyways

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan was actually first to say he loves me

**Oikawa:** We had been messing around all day and arguing so I pretended to be sad so I was ignoring him

**Oikawa:** And he called me stupid and kissed my forehead and said “you know I love you, right?”

**Oikawa:** So cute

**Hinata:** That’s fitting

**Oikawa:** Yeah well so is yours

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** BECAUSE YOU’RE BOTH STUPID

**Sugawara:** Oh?

**Sugawara:** How did it happen?

**Hinata:** AHHH

**Hinata:** I texted Kageyama goodnight and added an I love you

**Hinata:** and then turned my phone off because I was embarrassed

**Oikawa:** Stupid

**Hinata:** MEAN YOU’RE SO MEAN

**Yamaguchi:** Me and Tsukki have a cute story!

**Akaashi:** Ooooh tell us

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki told me first

**Yamaguchi:** He was super nervous all night because it was my first dinner at his house as his boyfriend lol

**Yamaguchi:** He was walking me home and I was teasing him for being nervous because like, I’ve already met his family before and stuff

**Yamaguchi:** And he was like “I just don’t want to mess anything up because I love you so much”

**Yamaguchi:** And then he wouldn’t look at me the rest of the way to my house

**Yamaguchi:** Maybe it’s because I kept teasing him but it was cute

**Kenma:** That made my pants SO POOPY 

**Yamaguchi:** Oh my

**Hinata:** Aw Yamaguchi that’s so cute

**Yamaguchi:** I keep telling you guys that Tsukki is cute but I guess no one believes me

**Yamaguchi:** When we were little, I drew him a dinosaur with his hair and glasses and he has it pinned up on the little board he has in his bedroom

**Kenma:** I CHANGED MY PANTS AND THEY’RE POOPY AGAIN AHHH

**Kuroo:** HAHA CALM DOWN

**Kuroo:** I always told Kenma I loved him but like I didn’t realize what kind of love it was until I started dating people

**Kuroo:** And I was kinda just like “Oh shit I’m just so in love with my cute kenma when did this start”

**Kuroo:** It wasn’t some grand declaration

**Kuroo:** But yeah lol

**Sugawara:** You’re just soulmates

**Kenma:** Exactly😻 

**Yaku:** Ew omg why are we talking about this

**Kenma:** YAKU PLEASE TELL YOUR STORY 

**Yaku:** ew ew okay

**Sugawara:** I’m nervous?

**Yaku:** It was embarrassing

**Yaku:** We were in practice and like omg

**Yaku:** I was practicing with Shibayama and he like, dove to receive the ball right as Lev spiked one basically directly to him

**Yaku:** So I bumped the ball back to their side before it could hit him

**Yaku:** And Lev like ran over to apologize but he stopped and like

**Yaku:** Picked me up and was just yelling

**Kenma:** AHAHHA

**Kuroo:** “Yaku is so cool I love you so much”

**Yaku:** God

**Sugawara:** Aw he’s so cute for that omg

**Yaku:** It was so embarrassing

**Yaku:** I wanted to kill him but like

**Yaku:** He said he loved me so I thought that would have been mean

**Yaku:** Plus, I love him too much to kill him

**Kenma:** Very cute

**Kenma:** I’ve started my ascent

**Yaku:** he’s gonna read this in the morning

**Yaku:** Ew he’s gonna kiss me

**Sugawara:** He’s your boyfriend

**Yaku:** Ew he’s gonna kiss me

**Sugawara:** LMAO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would you guys be interested in like a little series where we actually write out scenarios from Dance Machines? Let us know which scenes you'd want us to write 🤗 Hopefully not any smut because we're 😎scared as fuck😎 but we'll try I guess teehee teehee teehee


	125. Literally I have another episode idea so I might start another one I’m also gonna edit this later because I wrote it 🥰on my phone💘 anywho anywho Mashi Mashi be living in my head but she’s always there so I’m not surprised but today she’s SCREAMING at me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akaashi: bokuto almost got in a fight 
> 
> Tsukishima: what
> 
> Kuroo: DID HE WIN

**🙃**

**Kunimi:** Do you guys ever think about the time where Oikawa thought Kyoutani liked Iwaizumi

**Sugawara:** That happened?

**Oikawa:** I thought WE WEREN’T TALKING ABOUT THAT EVER AGAIN KUNIMI

**Kunimi:** No guys you should think about it

**Kunimi:** Remember when Oikawa was so sad and didn’t show up to practice because of it

**Kageyama:** That’s kinda sad

**Kageyama:** Kinda embarrassing

**Iwaizumi:** Mostly embarrassing 

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan

**Kunimi:** Or sometimes I think about when Kindaichi squared up to this guy who was just telling me my backpack was open because he thought he was flirting with me

**Kindaichi:** That’s embarrassing 

**Kunimi:** It’s okay Kindaichi, we all know you won’t fight anyone

**Kunimi:** You’re just a soft little guy 

**Kindaichi:** What

**Kunimi:** just a soft little peaceful guy

**Kindaichi:** What

**Kunimi:** Or I think about when we walked into the club room and Iwaizumi was shoving his tongue down Oikawa’s throat

**Iwaizumi:** Kunimi what why are we talking about this

**Iwaizumi:** It was once

**Kunimi:** Three times

**Kunimi:** And that’s not including the times Yahaba caught you

**Oikawa:** Well upperclassmen get dressed first so what were you doing in the club room anyways

**Kunimi:** When the upperclassmen take too long and we finished cleaning up I think it’s okay to change

**Oikawa:** I don’t like your attitude

**Kunimi:** Well I don’t like your lack of regard for your surroundings 

**Sugawara:** What is happening

**Kunimi:** I’m reminiscing

**Oikawa:** Someone’s upset that they don’t get to kiss Iwa-chan

**Kunimi:** I’m sure I’m not the only one

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Kindaichi:** WHAT

**Kunimi:** I have a boyfriend

**Sugawara:** AHAHAH WTF KUNIMI ARE YOU OKAY

**Kunimi:** Yes I’m just reminiscing 

**Kunimi:** jk I’m feeling weirdly chaotic and I think it’s because I’m lacking attention

**Kunimi:** Kindaichi pay attention to me

**Kindaichi:** I’m in class

**Kunimi:** And?

**Kindaichi:** I’ll come over after this then

**Kunimi:** Amazing wow

**Kunimi:** My boyfriend knows exactly what I need

**Oikawa:** You’re so scary

**Kunimi:** Get over it

**Oikawa:** Omg

**Iwaizumi:** Lmaoooo

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan defend me!

**Iwaizumi:** Kunimi, even though it’s pretty funny

**Iwaizumi:** Please refrain from bullying Oikawa just because you’re restless

**Kunimi:** Lame whatever 

**-**

**Tanaka:** I was just told the WORST NEWS EVER

**Asahi:** ? Is everything okay?

**Kiyoko:** yes everything is fine

**Kiyoko:** he’s just being stupid

**Tanaka:** ANYWAYS

**Tanaka:** Kiyoko had a dream that she went shopping with Saeko

**Tanaka:** and Bokuto was carrying Kiyoko’s bags

**Tanaka:** and the three of them were eating sugar cookies and having a fun time

**Kiyoko:** yes

**Asahi:** where’s the bad news

**Tanaka:** I WASNT IN THE DREAM ASAHI

**Tanaka:** ISNT IT FUCKED?

**Asahi:** well

**Asahi:** it’s a dream

**Tanaka:** A FUCKED ONE

**Asahi:** well

**Asahi:** she can’t control a dream

**Tanaka:** I think it’s unfair that Bokuto was there and I wasn’t

**Tanaka:** And why my sister

**Tanaka:** I’m the best Tanaka there is

**Asahi:** Well um

**Asahi:** it was a dream

**Kiyoko:** exactly

**Kiyoko:** idk what you want me to say Ryuu

**Tanaka:** you don’t have to say anything

**Tanaka:** just dream about me next time

**Kiyoko:** omg

**Akaashi:** bokuto carries the bags when we go shopping

**Akaashi:** he literally insists he does it

**Akaashi:** so great dream and great characterization

**Tanaka:** are you leaving me for my sister?

**Kiyoko:** maybe I should

**Tanaka:** KIYOKO PLEASW

**Kiyoko:** it was a joke lol

**Kiyoko:** tonight I’ll try really hard to dream about you

**Nishinoya:** as you should😤😤

**Akaashi:** Maybe I’ll dream about Bokuto

**Bokuto:** AS YOU SHOULD

**Nishinoya:** As you should😤😤

-

**Akaashi** and  **Bokuto**

**Akaashi:** Bokuto are you alright?

**Akaashi:** where are you?

**Bokuto:** WASHIO ISNT LETTING ME LEAVE

**Akaashi:** okay I was worried about you

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI HELP I WANT TO SEE YOU BUT HE KEEPS GIVING ME MORE DRINKS

**Akaashi:** lmao just come over after

**Bokuto:** I WANT TO SEE YOU THOUGH

**Bokuto:** HE KEEPS ASKING WHAT IM RUSHING FOR

**Bokuto:** I TOLD HIM I WAS LEAVING BECAUSE I WAS GOING TO SEE YOU AND SARUKUI IS HELPING HIM HOLD ME DOWN

**Akaashi:** Just hang out with them and then I’ll come pick you up and we’ll walk together to my place

**Bokuto:** OKAY ILL SEE YOU SOON AKAASHI I LOVE YOU

**Akaashi:** lol love you too

**-**

**🙃**

**Bokuto** changed the group name to  _ Akaashi is so pretty right now he’s always so beautiful I love Akaashi and I’ll never stop loving him literally I would die without him and I WILL be dying for him thank you very much _

**Akaashi:** Bokuto omg

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI

**Tsukishima:** What is going on

**Akaashi:** bokuto almost got in a fight 

**Tsukishima:** what

**Kuroo:** DID HE WIN

**Akaashi:** almost got in a fight

**Kuroo:** DID HE WIN

**Akaashi:** Kuroo lol

**Kenma:** Is he okay?

**Akaashi:** aside from being drunk, he’s fine!

**Kenma:** So what caused the fight?

**Kuroo:** the fight that he WON

**Akaashi:** he called me to come get him and he was really drunk

**Akaashi:** kinda weird because Bokuto can hold his alcohol so Washio was really making him drink lol

**Akaashi:** this guy came up to me and was like getting really close to me and trying to hold my waist 

**Akaashi:** and Bokuto saw so he came up to us and tried to take my hand but the guy pushed him so Bokuto pushed him back and then grabbed me and we went to leave

**Akaashi:** but then the guy like came back up to him and was getting in his face and shouting

**Akaashi:** So Bokuto ✨punched him✨

**Akaashi:** and then we ran out

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** are you just gonna scream in here all night lmao

**Bokuto:** Akaashi

**Akaashi:** yes Bokuto

**Bokuto:** I didn’t mean to cause a scene but he made me really angry

**Bokuto:** hopefully I didn’t embarrass you

**Akaashi:** you didn’t embarrass me. I should thank you!

**Bokuto:** GOOD YAY ALSO DONT THANK ME I JUST LOVE YOU

**Kenma:** Where were you guys anyways

**Akaashi:** some bar close to campus lol

**Akaashi:** But now we’re at my place and he’s looking for ice cream

**Kuroo:** I KNEW IT OMG I KNOW MY BFF SO WELL

**Kuroo:** I ALREADY ORDERED ICE CREAM FOR YOU GUYS AHAH ITS BEING DELIVERED

**Bokuto:** BRO THANK YOU

**Kuroo:** BRO YOU DESERVE IT YOU JUST WON A FIGHT

**Akaashi:** it wasn’t a fight. It was ALMOST a fight

**Kenma:** _ attached video _

**Kenma:** I’m glad Sarukui recorded it instead of helping you guys

**Akaashi:** right? He does amazing work

**Kuroo:** looks like Bokuto won to me!!!

**Akaashi:** Kuroo omg

**Bokuto:** That guy has been a problem all night. He kept making girls uncomfortable so we’d go and sit with them until he left

**Kiyoko:** that’s very nice of you guys Bokuto

**Sugawara:** PERIODT WTF BOKUTO

**Sugawara:** Fukurodani is full of chivalrous men

**Akaashi:** yeah they’re all sweet

**Bokuto:** WHAT ABOUT ME AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** you’re the best one

**Bokuto:** ICE CREAM IS HERE

**Akaashi:** okay guys lol, I’m gonna make sure he doesn’t do anything weird

**Sugawara:** have fun!

**Tsukishima:** Bokuto acts no different when he’s drunk wtf like you could show me this group chat and the video and I would think he’s sober

**Kuroo:** Right?? His power

**Kuroo:** it’s more of how he acts though

**Kuroo:** like he gets super alpha male and it’s funny

**Kuroo:** Like he’ll make anything a competition when he’s drunk so he can show off to Akaashi

**Kuroo:** it’s cute to watch though because Akaashi plays along with it and Bokuto gets so excited

**Tsukishima:** sounds exhausting 

**Kenma:** it is

**Kuroo:** It isn’t

**Kuroo:** oop

**Kenma:** oop

**Kenma:** 🤭

**Kuroo:** 🤭

**Kenma:** HAHAHA KURO GET OUT OF MY HEAD 

**Kuroo:** HAHAHA

-

**Akaashi:** oh no

**Akaashi:** the chivalrous acts are backfiring

**Kageyama:** oh?

**Akaashi:** one of the girls that Bokuto helped works at the coffee shop we go to all the time

**Akaashi:** and she’s just 👎🏻talking to him🤢

**Akaashi:** like I don’t 🙃exist🙂 like I didn’t 🚶‍♂️walk🚷 in here with him and order our ☕️drinks☕️ 👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨together👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨 and 🐒sit down🐒 with him

**Akaashi:** And my boyfriend is too sweet for his own good

**Akaashi:** and also he’s an attention whore but that’s not what we’re focusing on here

**Akaashi:** he’s just talking to her with our drinks in his hands

**Akaashi:** she has a job to do but she’s talking to him instead

**Akaashi:** my stupid, chivalrous, handsome boyfriend just had to wear his hair down today too

**Akaashi:** Kageyama I’m sorry I’m typing so much lol

**Kageyama:** it’s okay lol

**Kageyama:** I wanted to know anyways

**Kageyama:** doesn’t it suck when they’re so nice? And like they can’t tell that people are flirting

**Akaashi:** it’s terrible

**Kageyama:** they should just be awkward and look unapproachable

**Akaashi:** exactly!! It’s not that hard!!

**Kageyama:** but Bokuto really loves you lol so I think that’s why he doesn’t notice

**Akaashi:** Yeah usually I’ll be like “was she flirting with you?”

**Akaashi:** and he’s always like “oh no, was she?” And then he apologizes forever lol

**Kageyama:** aw that’s kinda cute :-)

**Akaashi:** right? 

**Akaashi:** he’s coming back lol

**Akaashi:** oh god he’s gonna read these lmaooo

**Akaashi:** oh well, I’ll talk to you later

**Kageyama:** have a good day Akaashi! :-))

**Akaashi:** aw you too :-))


	126. the atsukita brain rot i've had today is inredible tbh also i've never heard silence quite this loud. now i'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking and i'm dying to know is it killing you like it's killing me yeah. I don't know what to

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kunimi: I’m breaking up with you.
> 
> Kindaichi: No

_ Akaashi is so pretty right now he’s always so beautiful I love Akaashi and I’ll never stop loving him literally I would die without him and I WILL be dying for him thank you very much _

**Iwaizumi** changed the group name to  _ Tooru = horror _

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** I think Tooru has brainwashed Seijoh

**Oikawa:** What???

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan don’t say that!!!

**Iwaizumi:** It’s true

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Kunimi:** What

**Kindaichi:** What

**Sugawara:** What

**Kuroo:** Lol wut

**Iwaizumi:** So like

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru likes to listen to music when he cleans right

**Iwaizumi:** So he’s playing Daisy by Ashnikko rn 

**Sugawara:** I love that song 😈

**Iwaizumi:** Of course you do

**Sugawara:** I’m not sure what that means

**Sugawara:** But I think you’re being rude

**Kindaichi:** Idk what that is

**Kunimi:** The one song that’s like

**Kunimi: 😛** Fuck a princess i’m a kinggggg 😖 blah blah blah 🙄

**Kunimi: 🤪** I’m crazy but you like thatttt 🥳 blah blah blah 🤩

**Kunimi:** You hum it all the time

**Kenma:** I love the blah blah blah’s

**Kunimi:** Thx

**Kindaichi:** OH

**Kindaichi:** I fucking hate that song

**Kunimi:** Me too

**Kunimi:** I like it when you sing it but that’s it

**Kindaichi:** Aw

**Kunimi:** Haha don’t say aw, I was kidding

**Kindaichi:** Aww 

**Kunimi:** STOP IT WAS A JOKE

**Kindaichi:** AWWW

**Kunimi:** STOP STOP

**Oikawa:** Idk what you guys are talking about?? You all love that song?? ٩◔̯◔۶

**Oikawa:** You listen to it at practice all the time!!!（●＞ω＜●）

**Iwaizumi:** Because YOU put it on

**Iwaizumi:** Which goes back to my original point

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa’s playing that song rn and it’s making me want to run

**Kindaichi:** WAIT HAHA WHENEVER I HEAR IT I WANT TO RUN TOO

**Iwaizumi:** EXACTLY

**Kenma:** I

**Kenma:** Am so confused 😎

**Oikawa:** I always put it on when we’re running because it’s a good running song!!

**Iwaizumi:** It’s not a good running song, you’re just insane

**Kindaichi:** It’s horrible 

**Kunimi:** ^^^

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa’s music taste is horrible

**Oikawa:** IT ISN’T

**Kunimi:** You always put on the worst music to warm up to

**Oikawa:** Okay??? Should I take some recommendations from you??

**Oikawa:** I’ll put on some 2015 Halsey

**Oikawa:** Maybe that’ll make you happy, Kunimi

**Kageyama:** Lmaooo omfg

**Kenma:** Ewww

**Oikawa:** Badlands 😝

**Kunimi:** SHUT UP OMG

**Oikawa:** What was your fav song again? Colors?

**Kindaichi:** Actually it was New Americana because the whole ‘his husband at the altar’ line 

**Kunimi:** shut UP yuutarou 

**Oikawa:** Or we could play some Melanie Martinez??

**Oikawa:** Sippy Cup right??

**Kindaichi:** Lmaooo

**Kindaichi:** she said 😛😘 kids are still depressed when you dress them up 🤓😝

**Kindaichi:** And 12 y/o akira ate that shit up

**Kunimi:** I’m breaking up with you.

**Kindaichi:** No

**Kunimi:** YOU CAN’T JUST SAY NO 

**Kindaichi:** Yes I can

**Iwaizumi:** Lol

**Iwaizumi:** Kunimi if it makes you feel any better

**Iwaizumi:** When Uptown Funk first came out it was literally the only song Oikawa would listen to because he genuinely thought it was good

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN

**Oikawa:** YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN’T TELL ANYONE

**Iwaizumi:** NO I DIDN’T

**Oikawa:** BUT 

**Iwaizumi:** NO 

**Iwaizumi:** Stop being mean to Kunimi

**Iwaizumi:** And PUT OTHER MUSIC ON DURING PRACTICE

**Oikawa:** NO

**Oikawa:** WE’LL STOP LISTENING TO ASHNIKKO WHILE WE RUN WHEN I DIE

**Sugawara:** Oh my

**Kenma:** It’s okay guys

**Kenma:** Sometimes Kuro plays Taylor Swift when we warm up

**Kenma:** But like Old Taylor Swift

**Kenma:** Like

**Kenma:** Picture to Burn Era Taylor Swift

**Sugawara:** Ew wtf

**Sugawara:** At least listen to her new songs

**Kuroo:** I DO LISTEN TO HER NEW SONGS

**Kuroo:** Excuse me, I respect MY queen

**Kuroo:** You can’t run to folklore and lover wtf

**Kenma:** But you can run to all too well? Sure

**Kuroo:** You love it

**Kenma:** No I don’t

**Kenma:** I love you though so I don’t mind it

**Kuroo:** ლ(=ↀωↀ=)ლ 

**Kuroo:** I’m in love with you

**Kenma:** No ur not bc if u were u’d b kissing me right now (≚ᄌ≚)

**Kuroo:** omw

**Hinata:** We don’t usually listen to music when we warm up

**Hinata:** Daichi suggested it once

**Hinata:** And like, he wanted to get suggestions from everyone but we all ended up arguing so we just don’t

**Sugawara:** I don’t mind it being quiet

**Kageyama:** Me neither

**Tsukishima:** Me neither

**Yamaguchi:** Idk i think we could be listening to old taylor swift

**Yamaguchi:** 😛😛 I’ve never heard silence ❌❌🔇 quite this loud 📢📢🔉. Now I’m standing alone in a crowded room and we’re not speaking 🙃👩🧑🚫🗣

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi lol shut up

**Yamaguchi:** 🥴🥴AND I’M DYING TO KNOW 💭 IS IT KILLING 🔪🔪 YOU LIKE IT’S KILLING MEEEE 🪓🪓😛😛😛

**Sugawara:** Yamaguchi pls

**Oikawa:** Well

**Oikawa:** Kunimi, Kindaichi, and Iwa-chan, if there’s one thing you can take away from this conversation

**Oikawa:** It’s that you should feel blessed you’re on my team and can hear Ashnikko  ٩(◕‿◕｡)۶

**Oikawa:** Because I obviously have the most superior music taste 

**Iwaizumi:** I’d prefer if we just warmed up in silence

**Kunimi:** ^^

**Kindaichi:** ^^

**Oikawa:** YOU GUYS ARE JUST MEAN

\--

**Kuroo:** Good morning guys!! 

**Kuroo:** Look at this picture 

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** Kenma’s sleeping AND REN IS JUST CURLED UP ON THE PILLOW NEXT TO HIM!!!

**Kuroo:** Brain rot as fuck

**Kuroo:** I want another cat

**Kuroo:** Just so I can wake up to Kenma sleeping with them always

**Oikawa:** Omg!!! CUTE

**Oikawa:** I’m saving that pic

**Kuroo:** I’m sure Kenma would hate that

**Oikawa:** He can choke  (◕‿◕)♡

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** Here’s Sora sleeping on Iwa-chan!!!

**Sugawara:** I FORGOT YOU GUYS GOT A DOG

**Oikawa:** She’s not very photogenic lol so we don’t take a lot of pictures of her

**Oikawa:** Like I swear she has a third eye and can tell when we point the camera at her because she’ll start being so hyperactive

**Kita:** Omg

**Kita:** My dog does that

**Kita:** It’s so annoying

**Kita:** But also I got this really cute pic of him sleeping on Atsumu when he came to visit me

**Atsumu:** WHAT

**Kita:** Yeah lol

**Kita:** It’s my lockscreen

**Atsumu:** IT;SYOURLOCKSCREEN??!!!@@

**Kita:** Yes

**Kita:** Calm down

**Kita:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** AWWWW

**Kuroo:** I’M ASCENDING I’M ASCENDING

**Nishinoya:** _ attached image _

**Nishinoya:** suzu loves sleeping on asahi!!!

**Nishinoya:** It’s annoying

**Sugawara:** NO IT’S CUTE

**Oikawa:** IT’S CUTE

**Kuroo:** SO SO CUTE

**Atsumu:** Omg also!

**Atsumu:** Sorry sweetheart

**Atsumu** has removed  **Kita** from the chat

**Sugawara:** SWEETHEART OMG

**Atsumu:** Lol

**Atsumu:** I’M GOING TO VISIT KITA IN A FEW DAYS

**Atsumu:** I’M GONNA BE ABLE TO STAY FOR LIKE A WEEK I’M SO EXCITED

**Sugawara:** OMG YAY

**Oikawa:** CUTE CUTE CUTE

**Oikawa:** Why did you take him out of the chat though?

**Atsumu:** Bc it’s a surprise!!!

**Oikawa:** OMG FUN OMGOMGOMG

**Kageyama:** Aww Atsumu!! That’s so sweet

**Kageyama:** How out of character for you :-)

**Atsumu:** EXCUSE ME

**Hinata:** HAHAHAH

\--

**Yamaguchi:** GUYS

**Yamaguchi:** _ attached image _

**Yamaguchi:** What do you think?!?

**Sugawara:** OMFG

**Sugawara:** CUTE

**Nishinoya:** YAMAGUCHI OMG CUTE

**Oikawa:** Omg!!! I love it!!!

**Oikawa:** Where’d you get a maid outfit?

**Yamaguchi:** I still have it from when we dressed Kageyama up lol

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi wtf

**Tsukishima:** Why did you send that to the groupchat?

**Yamaguchi:** Because I look so cute!

**Yamaguchi:** _ attached image _

**Yamaguchi:** Don’t you think so?

**Tsukishima:** Stop. I know what you’re doing

**Sugawara:** YESS YAMAGUCHI

**Nishinoya:** Send more

**Tsukishima:** No don’t wtf

**Yamaguchi:** _ attached image _

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukkiiiiii

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi

**Yamaguchi:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** AHHHH

**Oikawa:** YAMAGUCHI DON’T HITCH YOUR SKIRT UP

**Yamaguchi:** Why not?

**Oikawa:** YOU KNOW WHY AHAHAHAH

**Kenma:** Oikawa I don’t think you can judge him

**Oikawa:** Idk what you mean

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi wtf 

**Tsukishima:** Stop

-

**Tsukishima** and  **Yamaguchi:**

**Tsukishima:** You should come over

**Yamaguchi:** Lol

**Yamaguchi:** On my way!! Just let me change first

**Tsukishima:** You don’t have to

**Yamaguchi:** I’m not walking to your apartment like this

**Tsukishima:** I’ll just come over to yours then

**Yamaguchi: 😋**

\--

**Kita:** Guys!

**Kita:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** OMG OMG OMG

**Kenma:** OMFG

**Kenma:** HE’S JUST HUGGING YOU

**Kita:** I know

**Kita:** It’s so cute

**Kita:** He keeps calling me sweetheart lol

**Kita:** Idk how old he thinks we are

**Kita:** We aren’t 60

**Sugawara:** STOP IT’S CUTE

**Kita:** It is

**Kita:** Lol omg

**Kita:** _ attached video _

**Sugawara:** I’M ABOUT TO GO FERAL OMG

**Sugawara:** He’s just HUGGING U!!! And BURYING HIS FACE IN UR CHEST!!!!

**Sugawara:** AND BEING LIKE “i missed u” “i missed u so much”

**Kageyama:** Awww this is so cute

**Kita:** He’s so clingy

**Oikawa:** IT’S CUTE

**Sugawara:** IT’S CUTE


	127. I wanted to keep going but I didn't want to make this episode 5000000 pages long and nothing happens so I'll save my ideas for the other one that i already started also lets talk about my dream about Yoosung actually lets not because I'm embarassed wtf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima: Do you just come in here to flirt with each other?
> 
> Kenma: Do you just come in here to RUIN MY LIFE LET THEM BE AND LET ME WATCH

_ Tooru = horror _

**Daichi:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** we’re basically all moved in to our new place

**Iwaizumi:** Oh wow you guys are already moving?

**Daichi:** Yup

**Iwaizumi:** That’s so exciting omg I’m happy for you guys

**Daichi:** Thank you!!

**Nishinoya:** TANAKA AND KIYOKO ARE THERE????

**Daichi:** Yeah lmao they just showed up and started helping

**Nishinoya:** CAN I COME OVER? I’LL HELP

**Nishinoya:** AND I’LL BRING US ALL LUNCH AND ASAHI

**Asahi:** Me?

**Nishinoya:** YES YOU

**Sugawara:** That would be really fun!

**Nishinoya:** OMG OMG YAY ASAHI YOU BETTER BE READY OMG

-

**Asahi:** Daichi and Suga have such a nice place.

**Asahi:** It already feels like a home idk

**Asahi:** Maybe it’s their vibes

**Kiyoko:** Or maybe it’s them feeding each other in the living room

**Oikawa:** Sounds cute I’m gonna vom

**Tanaka:** They touch each other every chance they get

**Kenma:** Now I’m gonna vom

**Daichi:** We’re just so happy lol

**Sugawara:** It’s so exciting omg

**Sugawara:** Once we’re all settled, everyone is getting invited over!

**Hinata:** YAY

**Bokuto:** YAY

**Atsumu:** Even me?

**Sugawara:** Yes!

**Osamu:** And me?

**Sugawara:** Yes!

**Atsumu:** No

**Osamu:** Suga said yes so I’m not listening to you

**Atsumu:** Fuck you then

**Osamu:** Fuck YOU then

**Kita:** Stop wtf

**Atsumu:** Osamu is annoying

**Kita:** You’re brothers, get over it

**Osamu:** Why would you remind me that we’re related 🤢

**Kageyama:** You’re literally twins

**Osamu:** Why would you remind me that we look the same 🤢

**Kageyama:** Daichi and Suga, do you need anymore help?

**Kageyama:** Sorry I’m so late!

**Daichi:** We’re fine! We didn’t have very much anyway. It’s just unpacking and finding homes for everything. Thank you though

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Nishinoya:** You guys only have 🤢1 bed🤢

**Asahi:** They’re practically married noya 

**Nishinoya:** They’re just gonna sleep together 🤢every day🤢

**Nishinoya:** Like 🤢boyfriends🤢

**Tanaka:** HAHAH SHUT UP 

**Kiyoko:** there’s a dog bed in this box omg

**Kiyoko:** You guys already bought dog stuff? There are so many toys

**Sugawara:** Oh lmao that’s kinda embarrassing

**Sugawara:** Yes! We know we’re getting a dog but we want to be fully settled in first

**Sugawara:** And we went to a pet store and got so excited and we couldn’t stop buying things lol

**Akaashi:** I’m gonna vom because that’s so cute

**Oikawa:** Everyone is vomming for Daichi and Suga

**Kageyama:** Good 

**Kuroo:** Lmaoo my man always speaks the truth

**Kuroo:** Wait so is this gonna be like a housewarming party

**Daichi:** Yeah I guess

**Kuroo:** Sooo like a housewarming party or a housewarming PARTY

**Sugawara:** It can be a PARTY but like only a small thing

**Kuroo:** Epic

**Sugawara:** If you vom in my kitchen you’re never allowed back 🥰

**Kuroo:** IT WAS ONE TIME

**Sugawara:** One time too many

**Sugawara:** Poor Kenma had to clean it up

**Kenma:** Well you did the majority of it NO ONE ELSE HELPED

**Sugawara:** Lol I just wanted to get it done 

**Kenma:** Kuro please save me and Suga the trouble of cleaning up and go to the toilet

**Kuroo:** I’M SORRY OKAY IT WAS ONCE KENMA YOU KNOW I DONT REALLY GET MESSY WHEN I DRINK IT WAS A WEIRD DAY

**Kenma:** Are you embarrassed

**Kuroo:** YES

**Kenma:** You should be

**Daichi:** HAHAHA

-

**Osamu:** Tobio, I don’t think I’ve forgiven you

**Kageyama:** Did I do something?

**Osamu:** Yes and it’s unforgivable

**Kageyama:** I’m sorry! Idk what it is but I’m still sorry

**Osamu:** You chose TSUMU over ME

**Kageyama:** Omg that was forever ago

**Osamu:** And it still hurts

**Kageyama:** Well, I’m sorry I guess

**Atsumu:** WTF

**Osamu:** I mean look at me and look at him

**Osamu:** You had the opportunity to choose me BUT YOU PICKED HIM

**Kageyama:** Well

**Kageyama:** I didn’t have the opportunity?

**Osamu:** WAIT HOLD ON IS KITA HERE

**Kita:** Yes

**Osamu:** Does talking about this make you feel uncomfortable?

**Kita:** No! I love Kageyama

**Kageyama:** :-)

**Osamu:** HINATA

**Hinata:** Yes

**Osamu:** Are you gonna be uncomfortable if we talk about this?

**Hinata:** Nope! I love yamayama

**Atsumu:** I’ll just fucking die then, so everyone can be with Kageyama

**Osamu:** Okay so back to Kageyama WHY NOT ME

**Kageyama:** Well lmao I met you when I was already dating your brother for starters

**Kageyama:** And you barely talked to me when we met

**Osamu:** Maybe I was shy because I had a crush on you

**Kageyama:** You definitely didn’t

**Osamu:** But do you think I’m more attractive than tsumu

**Kageyama:** I think you look the same

**Osamu:** But I’m more attractive right?

**Kageyama:** I think you look the same

**Osamu:** KAGEYAMA YOU’RE BREAKING MY HEART

**Kageyama:** I’m just being honest

**Osamu:** Well, Hajime thought I was more attractive

**Iwaizumi:** I think you look the same

**Osamu:** Well I’ll just fucking die then, so everyone can be with Atsumu

**Iwaizumi:** oops

**Kageyama:** Sorry I guess

-

**Hinata:** Kageyama Kageyama

**Hinata:** Yamayama yamayama

**Hinata:** Tobioooooo

**Hinata:** Do you hate me or something?

**Hinata:** Do you wanna break up or something?

**Kageyama:** Why are you texting me?

**Oikawa:** that’s very rude Tobio ( ￣＾￣)

**Hinata:** Right??? I just want his attention

**Kageyama:** No, why are you texting me when we’re in the same room

**Kageyama:** you’re so cute wtf

**Kageyama:** He keeps glancing at his phone and playing with my fingers 

**Hinata:** Because I miss you and I want your attention!!!

**Oikawa:** Wut

**Kageyama:** You’re sitting on my lap rn

**Hinata:** Somehow, that’s not enough

**Kageyama:** Well then get off of your phone so I can pay attention to you properly

**Tsukishima:** Do you just come in here to flirt with each other?

**Kenma:** Do you just come in here to RUIN MY LIFE LET THEM BE AND LET ME WATCH

**Tsukishima:** ew

**Hinata:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** Look at him! He’s being so cute

**Nishinoya:** Shoulder kisses are a bit 🥵

**Hinata:** No he’s just being cute

**Hinata:** He always tells me he likes my shoulders because of the freckles on them

**Kenma:** Amazing

**Kenma:** I’m evaporating yesterday

**Oikawa:** KENMA 

**Hinata:** Okay I’m actually gonna put my phone away now lol

**Nishinoya:** 🥵?

**Kageyama:** 🥵

**Nishinoya:** KAGEYAMA AHHAHA

-

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI JUST TOLD ME THE CUTEST THING EVER

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi

**Yamaguchi:** They’ll think it’s cute Tsukki!!

**Tsukishima:** Well I think it’s embarrassing

**Yamaguchi:** So you’re embarrassed of your love for me?

**Tsukishima:** Don’t make it sound like that

**Sugawara:** Well you brought it up

**Sugawara:** I have to hear what it is now

**Kageyama:** Me too!!

**Tsukishima:** omg

**Yamaguchi:** omg it’s the cutest thing omg

**Yamaguchi:** He told me that he liked me ever since we were little!

**Tsukishima:** I only told you because i thought that’s when you started liking me too

**Yamaguchi:** I always thought you were super cool! Especially since you were so much taller than me

**Yamaguchi:** And you would tell me about Akiteru so I just thought your entire family was cool

**Yamaguchi:** And you were so smart so like, idk I always admired you

**Yamaguchi:** I didn’t really think about liking you until high school

**Tsukishima:** It’s so embarrassing 

**Yamaguchi:** I mean I’m sure I did like you! But, I didn’t notice until I got older

**Tsukishima:** And then you dated Yachi

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI STOP

**Tsukishima:** It’s the least I can say because you just embarrassed me

**Tsukishima:** So much

**Sugawara:** No!!

**Sugawara:** That’s really cute Tsukishima!!

**Sugawara:** You’ve just loved Yamaguchi forever

**Yamaguchi:** Wait Tsukki!! It’s all making sense

**Yamaguchi:** You rejected everyone in middle school 

**Kageyama:** And high school

**Tsukishima:** Shut up Tobio

**Yamaguchi:** and you’re so popular

**Yamaguchi:** You just rejected everyone because you liked me wtf

**Yamaguchi:** That makes me feel kinda good about myself

**Tsukishima:** And then you dated Yachi

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI

**Tsukishima:** Lmao

**Tsukishima:** But actually mom and Akiteru would tease me about it a lot

**Tsukishima:** They still do 

**Tsukishima:** and I guess so do you too now

**Yamaguchi:** NO TSUKKI I THINK IT'S SO CUTE

**Tsukishima:** It’s fine

**Tsukishima:** I’ll just put up with everyone in my life teasing me

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI DON’T MAKE ME FEEL BAD

**Tsukishima:** No it’s fine Tadashi, just make fun of me

**Kageyama:** Is this how you guys flirt?

**Yamaguchi:** HAHAH

**Tsukishima:** Shut up Tobio


	128. i bought like two sweaters and overestimated how (      ) i am and like they're two sizes too big lol periodt but i can't really return them because most places are doing no returns because covid so i guess i'll just cry because they make me look

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: Idk what this energy is but I’m scared of it

_ Tooru = horror _

**Kuroo:** This is so random but like

**Kuroo:** AHAHA I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING

**Kenma:** You’re sitting next to me with a straight face but sure

**Kuroo:** SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** ANYWAYS I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING

**Kuroo:** KITA

**Kuroo:** YOU AND SUNA ARE JUST DATING THE SAME GUY BUT WITH DIFFERENT HAIR

**Atsumu:** WHAT THE FUCK DON’T SAY THAT

**Kita:** Omg lol

**Atsumu:** NO NO DON’T SAY THAT

**Osamu:** EW 

**Osamu:** DON’T SAY THAT

**Atsumu:** Kuroo no

**Atsumu:** Omg

**Atsumu:** If you really think we’re the same person then I’ll have to pass away right now

**Osamu:** Me too

**Osamu:** That’s disgusting

**Kita:** It’s kind of true though

**Osamu:** UM

**Osamu:** KITA??

**Atsumu:** BABY WHAT

**Kuroo:** Is this a sensitive topic? 😼

**Atsumu:** Kuroo I hate you

**Atsumu:** We aren’t the same because I’m obviously the superior twin 

**Osamu:** Don’t be an idiot

**Osamu:** That’s me

**Kita:** No it’s Atsumu

**Osamu:** WHAT THE FUCK

**Osamu** added  **Suna Rintarou** to the chat

**Atsumu:** SUNA!!

**Suna:** Ew

**Osamu:** Hey what the hell man, leave suna alone 🤬

**Atsumu:** AM I NOT ALLOWED TO SAY HELLO????

**Osamu:** YOU DIDN’T SAY HELLO YOU JUST SAID HIS NAME

**Suna:** Um

**Suna:** Why am I here?

**Osamu:** SUNA

**Osamu:** WHO’S THE BETTER TWIN???

**Suna:** Seriously

**Osamu:** Please babe

**Suna:** 😐

**Suna:** It’s Osamu, obviously

**Kita:** I think you’re just biased 

**Suna:** Hmmm. Bold words coming from you

**Oikawa:** Idk what this energy is but I’m scared of it

**Suna:** Iwaizumi!

**Iwaizumi:** Oh god

**Suna:** What do you think?

**Iwaizumi:** Ummm

**Iwaizumi:** I’m not sure

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t think there has to be a superior twin

**Atsumu:** There does

**Osamu:** There does

**Atsumu:** EW DON’T SAY THE SAME THING AS ME

**Osamu:** I SENT IT FIRST

**Atsumu:** YOU LITERALLY DIDN’T

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up wtf

**Kita:** Kageyama! What do you think?

**Kageyama:** I think they’re both pretty epic

**Atsumu:** PRETTY EPIC AHAHA WHY ARE YOU TALKING LIKE THAT

**Osamu:** Epic

**Oikawa:** Epic

**Sugawara:** Epic

**Tsukishima:** Epic

**Kageyama:** Lol sorry Shouyou had my phpne

**Kageyama:** I told him not to answer lol

**Osamu:** So you DON’T think I’m epic??

**Atsumu:** He said I’m epic too

**Osamu:** Obviously he didn’t mean you

**Atsumu:** He dated me so obviously he did

**Osamu:** Well actually it was Hinata who said that so 

**Osamu:** He probably doesn’t think you’re epic because he didn’t date you

**Atsumu:** THAT ISN’T TRUE

**Atsumu:** Hinata you would date me right??

**Hinata:** Umm

**Atsumu:** LIKE IF YOU HADN’T MET KAGEYAMA AND YOU MET ME INSTEAD

**Atsumu:** WOULD YOU DATE ME

**Hinata:** Yeah probably

**Osamu:** WHAT

**Osamu:** WOULD YOU DATE ME HINATA???

**Hinata:** Uhhhh

**Osamu:** ?????!?!?!?!?

**Hinata** has left the chat

**Kita:** Good going, morons

**Suna:** Okay so it’s confirmed

**Suna:** Neither of you are better than the other, you’re both shitty

**Atsumu: 😧**

**Osamu: 😧**

**-**

**Kita:** _ attached image _

**Kita:** Look at the outfit Atsumu bought me today!

**Oikawa:** Omg it’s so cute!!!

**Oikawa:** Is he still staying at your house???

**Kita:** Yes! He leaves in a few days though

**Kita:** He stayed a bit longer than he was supposed to but that’s okay

**Kenma:** CUTE

**Suna:** _ attached image _

**Suna:** Osamu bought me flowers today !!

**Suna:** Like randomly

**Suna:** He just saw them and said they reminded him of me 

**Suna:** Hmm

**Kita:** Hmmm

**Sugawara:** Uhhhh...

**Sugawara:** .. Actually nvm 

**Sugawara:** That’s cute you guys!!

-

**Suna:** _ attached image _

**Suna:** Osamu is being so clingy today

**Suna:** Look at him

**Sugawara:** CUTE!!!

**Oikawa:** Aww cuteee he pisses me off 🥰

**Kita:** _ attached image _

**Kita:** Atsumu is always clingy

**Kita:** He’s so cute

**Kita:** Look at him

**Kita:** He’s being like extra clingy because he’s supposed to leave tomorrow 

**Kita:** Kinda have a feeling he’s not going to tho

**Kageyama:** Ummm awwww??

**Sugawara:** Ok I’m just going to say it

**Sugawara:** WHY ARE YOU GUYS COMPETING LMAO

**Kita:** What?

**Suna:** We’d never, that’s so stupid

**Kita:** Yeah esp because like

**Kita:** I’m already dating the better twin so why would I even need to compete

**Suna:** Lol Kita, you’re so funny

**Sugawara:** WHY 

**Sugawara:** ATSUMU AND OSAMU WHY DID YOU START THIS??

**Atsumu:** Um

**Atsumu:** It was an accident

**Osamu:** Kita 🤬

**Kita:** Um

**Kita:** Sorry Osamu, you’re not my type

**Osamu:** HUH

**Atsumu:** OSAMU WTF DON’T FLIRT WITH KITA 

**Atsumu:** YOU’RE NOT HIS TYPE

**Osamu:** SUNA HELP ME??

**Suna:** What the hell Osamu don’t flirt with Kita, you’re not his type

**Osamu:** UM WOW

**Oikawa:** THIS IS SO STUPID

**Oikawa:** KITA

**Oikawa:** OSAMU IS YOUR TYPE

**Oikawa:** SUNA

**Oikawa:** ATSUMU IS YOUR TYPE TOO

**Oikawa:** THEY LOOK THE SAME

**Kita:** Actually neither of them are my type because I don’t like shitty idiots

**Suna:** ^

**Atsumu:** HUH

**Osamu:** WHAT

**Kenma:** Is this how you guys live your lives? Everyday? 

**Kenma:** I wish everything was just grr 🤬 my twin brother 🤬 

**Kenma:** Sounds so simple

**Atsumu:** WHAT

**Atsumu:** KENMA YOU’RE SO MEAN

**Kenma:** NO YOU GUYS ARE STUPID AND I’M TIRED OF IT

**Osamu:** Um

**Kenma:** NO

**Kenma:** SHUT UP

**Kenma:** STOP TALKING. YOU’RE SO ANNOYING

**Kuroo:** u tell em baby 😽

**Atsumu:** KITA YOU AREN’T EVEN GOING TO DEFEND ME??

**Osamu:** SUNA??

**Kenma:** SHUT UP 

**Oikawa:** YESS KENMA

**Sugawara:** YES KENMA

**\--**

**Kenma:** ugh ugh

**Kenma:** I have the caffeine jitters

**Kenma:** So so bad 

**Kenma:** Omg

**Kenma:** And I have so much homework to do and it’s so hard to just sit and type 

**Kenma:** Ahhhhh

**Kenma:** AHHH

**Kenma:** This looks like Kageyama and Hinata  ヾ(￣ー￣(≧ω≦*)ゝ

**Kenma:** Don’t ask me to explain it

**Kenma:** It just does

**Kenma:** Why is no ojne responding 

**Kenma:** Ugh

**Kenma:** Anyways idk how to explain it but sable from acnh reminds me of osamu

**Osamu:** Wut

**Kenma:** I just said I didn’t know how to explain it

**Osamu:** KENMA PLEASE STOP HATING ME

**Osamu:** I PROMISE I’LL TRY TO GET ALONG WITH ATSUMU IN THE GROUPCHAT

**Kenma:** Anyways Kuro i miss you

**Osamu:** KENMAAAA

**Kenma:** Kuro kuro kuro

**Kenma:** Ugh

**Kenma:** tetsurou hates me :-(

**Osamu:** WHY??

**Kenma:** Like he hates me so so much :-(

**Oikawa:** Why? Where is he?

**Kenma:** At work 

**Osamu:** AHHH

**Sugawara:** Omfg Kenma

**Sugawara:** Your energy rn is so weird

**Kenma:** Idk what you mean

**Kenma:** Anyway lol throwback to when i was a kid and how I was literally terrified of sleepovers for some reason

**Kenma:** Like it was fine but then night time would come and I would get so panicky and start feeling sick

**Hinata:** You always left my house after like 7pm lol

**Oikawa:** I REMEMBER THAT OMG 

**Oikawa:** I’d always get so sad for you Kenma

**Oikawa:** Like was so sad that you’d get sad????

**Iwaizumi:** You mean you felt bad?

**Oikawa:** Yes

**Kenma:** Ew

**Kenma:** It was so scary

**Kenma:** Like I always felt like the world was ending

**Kenma:** Anyways my dad would always come pick me up because if I left the house he knew I’d be coming home so he’d stay up for me and then take me to get ice cream and tell me that it was okay  ☆ｏ(＞＜)○

**Kenma:** He’s so cute

**Kenma:** I love my dad so much

**Hinata:** KENMA AHHH I LOVE YOUR DAD

**Oikawa:** AHHHHH

**Oikawa:** I LOVE HIM

**Oikawa:** Lol remember when I’d go to your house in high school and every time he’d see me he’d go ‘wow tooru ur hair looks awesome today!’

**Oikawa:** It was so cute

**Kenma:** YES OMG AWW

**Kenma:** He’s so cute

**Kenma:** Fun fact the first friend who’s house I was able to stay at all night was Kuro ❤️ cute and iconic if you ask me

**Hinata:** I’m offended

**Oikawa:** ME TOO WTF

**Oikawa:** I’ve known you longer than you’ve known Kuroo  (；⌣̀_⌣́)

**Oikawa:** Kenma run away with me  (⊃｡•́‿•̀｡)⊃

**Hinata:** HEY I’VE KNOWN KENMA LONGER THAN YOU OIKAWA

**Hinata:** KENMA RUN AWAY WITH M E 

**Kenma:** Hmmm

**Kenma:** No  (◡﹏◡)

**Akaashi:** Kenma run away with me 🥰

**Kenma:** Okay ❤️

**Hinata:** Wow

**Oikawa:** Wow

**Kuroo:** NO 

**Kuroo:** KENMA I’M OFF WORK AND I’M ON MY WAY 

**Kenma:** Yay!!!!

**Kuroo:** i’m bringing home some pie 

**Kuroo:** They were on sale 

**Kenma:** Tetsurouuuu  ( =ノωヽ=)

**Kuroo:** AHHHH KENMA

**Kuroo:** I’VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH

**Kuroo:** I’M WALKING SO FAST

**Sugawara:** Kenma omg lol ur power

**Kenma:** ଲ(ⓛ ω ⓛ)ଲ

**Kuroo:** AHHHH 

**Kuroo:** Kenma I’m about to RUN

**Kenma:** You’re going to make yourself tired

**Kuroo:** I JUST WANT TO SEE YOU RIGHT NOW

**Akaashi:** Calm down you’ll see him in like 20 minutes!

**Kenma:** that’s too long

**Kuroo:** that’s too long

**\--**

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** OMG

**Sugawara:** UM

**Sugawara:** I’M ABOUT TO SHIT MY PANTS WHAT IS THAT

**Kenma:** WHAT WHAT

**Sugawara:** OIKAWA

**Osamu:** IWAIZUMI WHAT

**Kuroo:** UHM WHAT WHAT WHAT

**Kuroo:** OIKAWA COME BACK

**Hinata:** IS THAT A RING???

**Hinata:** DID IWAIZUMI PROPOSE TO YOU???????

**Kunimi:** wtf

**Kunimi:** WTF

**Kunimi:** OIKAWA

**Akaashi:** Wait but that ring is so beautiful

**Akaashi:** BUT ALSO WAIT WAIT OIKAWA WHAT

**Bokuto:** UMMMMMMM???

**Kuroo:** OIKAWA OIKAWA OIKAWA

**Daichi:** IWAIZUMI????

**Oikawa:** Lol

**Oikawa:** It’s just a promise ring

**Oikawa:** He was so cute giving it to me though like

**Oikawa:** HE TOOK ME OUT TO DINNER AND LIKE WAS SO NERVOUS AND I WAS KINDA SCARED

**Iwaizumi:** DON’T TELL ME YOU WERE SCARED IDIOT

**Daichi:** AWWWW

**Oikawa:** WELL I COULD TELL YOU WERE HIDING SOMETHING

**Sugawara:** I’M GOING TO DIE RN RN RN 

**Iwaizumi:** YOU’RE AN IDIOT

**Iwaizumi:** I love you so much

**Oikawa:** I love you more

**Iwaizumi:** impossible

**Iwaizumi:** Btw when are you coming home?

**Oikawa:** Mattsun and I are almost done!!!

**Oikawa:** And then we’ll be on our way!

**Iwaizumi:** Okay

**Oikawa:** OMG I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOU IWA-CHAN

**Iwaizumi:** It’s only been a few hours lol

**Oikawa:** I FEEL LIKE IT’S BEEN ALL NIGHT

**Oikawa:** I just want to kiss you  (´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡

**Iwaizumi:** Awww

**Sugawara:** I’M GOING TO SHIT IN MY SOCKS

**Kenma:** OMG OMG OMG


	129. DEAR JOHN, I SEE IT ALL NOW THAT YOU'RE GONE DON'T YOU THINK I WAS TOO YOUNG TO BE MESSED WITH THE GIRL IN THE DRESS CRIED THE WHOLE RIDE HOME, I SHOULD'VE KNOWN, DEAR JOHN I SEE IT ALL, NOW IT WAS WRONG, DON'T YOU THINK 19 IS TOO YOUNG TO BE PLAYED BY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Osamu: KITA
> 
> Osamu: Can you tell my shitty brother to answer his phone?

_ Tooru = horror _

**Kita:** SO REMEMBER WHEN I SAID ATSUMU WAS GONNA STAY LONGER 

**Kita:** I was right

**Kita:** _ attached image _

**Kita:** IT’S BEEN LIKE THREE WEEKS AND HE’S STILL HERE

**Atsumu:** Awww Kita

**Atsumu:** If you want me to leave you can just tell me 😔

**Kita:** You know I don’t

**Kita:** I never want you to leave

**Atsumu:** AWWWW

**Osamu:** Ew

**Osamu:** Maybe break up 🤩 my mental health could do with Atsumu being miserable 💆‍♂️

**Atsumu:** Omg

**Atsumu:** Sorry that you just hate seeing me win bitch 😛

**Kenma:** Stop being mean to each other! 

**Kenma:** At least go do it somewhere else

**Osamu:** Sorry Kenma

**Atsumu:** Lol

**Atsumu:** Well I’m not sorry because I didn’t do anything wrong

**Kenma:** ...

**Atsumu:** I DIDN’T

**Kenma:** You always do something wrong

**Atsumu:** EXCUSE ME

**Atsumu:** Kuroo your boyfriend is so rude

**Atsumu:** Anyways

**Atsumu:** Yesterday Kita and I went to a little stream by his house to have a picnic and I picked flowers and put them in his hair!

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** Look how cute he is!!!!

**Kageyama:** Atsumu you’re being so cute right now

**Atsumu:** Idk what you mean

**Kita:** Aww you made him blush 

**Kita:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Sugawara:** WHAT IS THIS

**Sugawara:** YOU TWO ARE BEING SO CUTE RN

**Atsumu:** AHHH SHUT UP I JUST

**Atsumu:** I LIKED KITA FOR SO LONG AND I’M JUST SO HAPPY

**Kita:** Omg shut up

**Kita:** You’re so embarrassing 

**Atsumu:** I’m sorry!!!!

**Kita:** It’s ok darling ❤️

**Kita:** I was just joking

**Sugawara:** I feel like i just got stabbe din the CHEST WITH AN ARROW OR SOMETHING OMFG

**Sugawara:** KITA DO YOU JUST CALL HIM DARLING??

**Kita:** Sometimes yeah 

**Kenma:** AHHHHHH

\--

_ Tooru = horror _

**Kita** has left the chat

**Oikawa:** What

**Sugawara:** What

**Osamu:** ?

**Suna:** What

**Hinata:** What

**Yamaguchi:** ??

\--

**Kageyama** and  **Atsumu:**

**Atsumu:** Are you at home?

**Kageyama:** Yeah!

**Kageyama:** Why? 

**Kageyama:** Aren’t you still with Kita?

**Atsumu:** Can I come over?

**Kageyama:** Sure??

**Kageyama:** Is everything okay?

**Kageyama:** Atsumu??

\--

**Kageyama** and  **Hinata:**

**Kageyama:** Hey baby

**Kageyama:** Are you still with Yamaguchi?

**Hinata:** Yamayama!! ❤️

**Hinata:** Yes!

**Hinata:** Are you still working on homework?

**Kageyama:** No

**Hinata:** Oh! What are you doing?

**Kageyama:** So like

**Kageyama:** About that

**Hinata:** ?

**Kageyama:** Atsumu is here

**Hinata:** Why? I thought he was still with Kita

**Kageyama:** They broke up

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Hinata:** TOBIO??

**Hinata:** Are you serious????

**Kageyama:** ...Yeah

**Kageyama:** He hasn’t mentioned much about why

**Kageyama:** Like he doesn’t want to talk about it

**Hinata:** ..Do you think it’s just like

**Hinata:** A stupid fight that got blown a little out of proportion? 

**Hinata:** Or do you think they’re actually broken up for good?

**Kageyama:** I’m not sure

**Kageyama:** Atsumu is weirdly against getting back together with people

**Kageyama:** And also when we broke up we obviously stayed apart. Like, he moved on pretty quickly 

**Kageyama:** But I’ve also never seen him cry before 

**Hinata:** HE’S CRYING??

**Kageyama:** He has been since he got here

**Kageyama:** Idk what to do

**Kageyama:** Can you um 

**Hinata:** I’m on my way home right now

**Kageyama:** Thank you Shouyou

**Hinata:** ❤️ I’ll see you soon Tobio

\--

**Osamu** and  **Atsumu**

**Osamu:** Heyyyy shitty bitch when are you coming home?

**Osamu:** Because like

**Osamu:** Not saying that you should keep bugging Kita to stay at his place but Suna wants to spend a few days together

**Osamu:** It’s our one month anniversary 

**Osamu:** Yeah 😎 that’s right idiot 😎

**Osamu:** WHY AREN’T YOU ANSWERING

**Osamu:** Whatever

**Osamu:** Anyways 😎 just stay away for a few more days u cockroach idiot

-

**Osamu:** Hey

**Osamu:** Tsumu

**Osamu:** STOP LEAVING ME ON READ?

**Osamu:** Dude 

_ Incoming call from:  _ **Osamu 🤬👎💩**

_ Call Declined _

_ Incoming call from:  _ **Osamu 🤬👎💩**

_ Call Declined _

_ Incoming call from:  _ **Osamu 🤬👎💩**

_ Call Declined _

_ Incoming call from:  _ **Osamu 🤬👎💩**

_ Call Declined _

_ Incoming call from:  _ **Osamu 🤬👎💩**

_ Call Declined _

_ Incoming call from:  _ **Osamu 🤬👎💩**

_ Call Declined _

**Osamu:** WTF

\--

**Osamu** and  **Kita**

**Osamu:** KITA

**Osamu:** Can you tell my shitty brother to answer his phone?

**Kita:** Atsumu?

**Osamu:** ...What other shitty brother do I have?

**Kita:** Oh

**Kita:** He left, so he’s not here. 

**Kita:** Sorry

**Osamu:** Oh okay

**Osamu:** Thanks for letting me know!

\--

**Osamu** and  **Atsumu**

**Osamu:** So Kita said you left so I’m going to assume you’re declining my calls because you’re on the train

**Osamu:** So. Let me know when you’re at the station and I’ll come pick you up

**Osamu:** And then we can go to the store and you can buy all the food as a sorry present for being gone for so long 

**Osamu:** u piece of shit

-

**Osamu:** Tsumu

**Osamu:** TSUMU

**Osamu:** Please tell me you got to the station okay

**Osamu:** It’s been like

**Osamu:** 12 hours

**Osamu:** And I know the train takes a long time but not that long

**Osamu:** Atsumu

**Osamu:** Are you okay?

**Osamu:** Atsumu

**Osamu:** OH GOD YOU AREN’T READING MY MESSAGES

_ Incoming call from:  _ **Osamu 🤬👎💩**

_ New voicemail from:  **Osamu 🤬👎💩** _

_ Incoming call from:  _ **Osamu 🤬👎💩**

_ New Voicemails from:  _ **Osamu 🤬👎💩**

**\--**

**Suna** and  **Osamu:**

**Osamu:** Suna

**Osamu:** Atsumu still isn’t answering mr

**Osamu:** me

**Suna:** What?? 

**Suna:** Wasn’t he supposed to be home today?

**Osamu:** Yes 

**Osamu:** AND HE’S STILL NOT HOME AND HE’S NOT EVEN LOOKING AT MY MESSAGES

**Osamu:** What if he died?? Oh god oh god

**Osamu:** i don’t think i can live without him

**Osamu:** I’m so worried

**Osamu:** Should I call our mom?

**Osamu:** I don’t want to worry her over nothing just in case but oh my god

**Osamu:** I feel like something happened

**Osamu:** Otherwise he would be answering me

**Suna:** It’s okay, just calm down

**Suna:** I’m going to come over, okay?

**Osamu:** I’ll leave the door unlocked

**Suna:** Alright love

**Suna:** I’ll be there soon

\--

_ Tooru = horror _

**Osamu:** Has anyone heard from Atsumu??

**Osamu:** Preferably in the last like

**Osamu:** 12 hours???

**Osamu:** Please he’s not answering me and I’m really scared

**Sugawara:** What??

**Sugawara:** Wait what happened????

**Osamu:** Idk?? I guess he left Kita’s but he’s not answering and he’s still not home

**Kenma:** Oh my god

**Kenma:** Uhhh

**Kenma:** I could try to text him?

**Sugawara:** Me too?

**Kageyama:** He’s with me

**Kageyama:** Sorry, I just saw this

**Kageyama:** Osamu I’ll text you

**Osamu:** ???Okay

\--

**Kageyama** and  **Osamu:**

**Osamu:** KAGEYAMA TOBIO

**Osamu:** WHY DO YOU HAVE MY BROTHER???

**Kageyama:** Okay so like

**Kageyama:** He’s been here for like a week

**Osamu:** WHAT

**Kageyama:** Yeah

**Kageyama:** Kita broke up with him

**Osamu:** WHAT

**Osamu:** What the fuck

**Osamu:** What happened??

**Kageyama:** I’m not sure?

**Kageyama:** He just said that things were going ‘really great and then suddenly they weren’t’ and they were just stepping on each other’s nerves and Kita just broke up with him

**Osamu:** What the fuck

**Osamu:** Can you send me your address?

**Osamu:** I’m coming over

**Kageyama:** Yeah

**Kageyama:** _ attached location _

\--

_ Tooru = horror _

**Oikawa:** Osamu did you find Atsumu??

**Oikawa:** Did you rescue him from Tobio???!!!

**Sugawara:** ATSUMU I MISS YOU

**Kuroo:** ATSUMU ATSUMU ATSUMU WHERE ARE YOU??

**Osamu:** Leave him alone

**Sugawara:** What

**Osamu:** Just

**Osamu:** Idk he’s just not really okay right now so maybe don’t pester him

**Osamu:** Sorry

**Kenma:** Oh. What.. happened?

**Atsumu:** Kita and I broke up

**Sugawara:** Oh my god. I’m sorry Atsumu!

**Oikawa:** I’M SORRY OMG

**Kuroo:** Aww Atsumu!! I’m so sorry

**Atsumu:** It’s fine

**Atsumu:** It’s not like I thought he was the love of my life or anything

**Kageyama:** Atsumu :-(

  
  



	130. Sirius and Remus are back in my brain, rightfully so. Anyways WE GOT BILLS TO PAY WE GOT NOTHING FIGURED OUT WHEN IT WAS HARD TO TAKE YES YES THIS IS WHAT I THOUGHT ABOUT DO YOU REMEMBER WE WERE SITTING THERE BY THE WATER YOU PUT YOUR ARM AROUND ME FOR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Osamu: Cmon baby bro 👶🏻👯♂️
> 
> Osamu: Get out of your room and accompany me to the creamery

**Osamu** and  **Atsumu**

**Osamu:** Hello twin

**Osamu:** I was wondering if you would like to accompany me to get some ice cream 

**Osamu:** With just me

**Osamu:** Not a Suna in sight I promise

**Osamu:** Just me and bro

**Osamu:** Me and my baby brother

**Atsumu:** We’re twins 

**Osamu:** Cmon baby bro 👶🏻👯‍♂️

**Osamu:** Get out of your room and accompany me to the creamery

**Atsumu:** Will you stop talking like this if I go?

**Osamu:** If that’s what my baby bro wishes

**Atsumu:** Dude

**Osamu:** Well?

**Atsumu:** I’m getting ready right now

**Osamu:** Amazing

**Osamu:** You better not wear red because that’s what I’m wearing 😡👊🏻

**Atsumu:** Okay give me a minute then because now I have to change my shirt

**Osamu:** My baby bro just wants to twin with me 🥺👯‍♂️

**Atsumu:** Samu omg

**Osamu:** I HEAR YOU LAUGHING HURRY UP AND FIND A SHIRT

**Osamu:** AND DON'T WEAR CHUCKS BECAUSE I’M WEARING MINE

**Atsumu:** omg

**Atsumu:** Well give me another minute then BECAUSE I JUST LACED MINE UP

-

_ Tooru = horror _

**Osamu:** _ Attached image _

**Osamu:** I managed to drag my brother out of his room

**Kageyama:** !!!

**Sugawara:** Atsumu!

**Atsumu:** Ew I look terrible in that pic

**Oikawa:** Yeah, like your boyfriend broke up with you or something

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru

**Osamu:** Hey stop that

**Osamu:** My baby bro is fragile right now. ONLY I CAN JOKE WITH HIM

**Atsumu:** I laughed, it’s okay 

**Osamu:** You look like shit, almost like you don’t have a boyf anymore

**Atsumu:** omg

**Osamu:** I see the tears in your eyes

**Osamu:** DON’T CRY INTO YOUR ICE CREAM EW BITCH

**Osamu:** SUCK THOSE TEARS UP TSUMU QUICK

**Osamu:** HE’S LAUGHING AND CRYING WHAT DO I DO

**Kageyama:** He’s probably feeling a lot of things right now lol 

**Kageyama:** I’m glad you’re getting out though!

**Atsumu:** Thanks Tobio

**Hinata:** Are you feeling okay?

**Hinata:** Wait that’s a dumb question sorry

**Atsumu:** You’re okay lol

**Atsumu:** Idk man, I’m going through it. I’m not used to feeling this sad over someone

**Sugawara:** :-(

**Sugawara:** Well, we’re all kind of far but we’re here if you need anything Atsumu! We’ll get there as soon as we can

**Atsumu:** Thank you

**Atsumu:** Also Samu ordered me rocky road and I think he wants me dead

**Osamu:** what

**Atsumu:** I hate rocky road

**Osamu:** What

**Osamu:** That’s news to me

**Atsumu:** Omg

**Osamu:** Well if you hate it why are you eating it??

**Atsumu:** Because you paid for it

**Osamu:** Fuck my wallet baby bro, I’ll go buy you a new one

**Atsumu:** Lmaoo stop calling me that

**Iwaizumi:** Baby bro wtf

**Atsumu:** Idk he’s been saying it all week

**Osamu:** Because you’re my baby bro

**Atsumu:** We’re literally the same age

**Osamu:** Idk what you’re talking about

-

**Kageyama** ,  **Osamu** ,  **Hinata** and  **Atsumu**

**Hinata:** Are you guys home?

**Atsumu:** Yup

**Hinata:** Okay!! Me and Tobio are gonna be there in like 20 minutes

**Osamu:** ?!

**Atsumu:** ?!

**Hinata:** We’re not staying! Just dropping you guys dinner 🥰

**Atsumu:** Wut

**Osamu:** Oh wtf thanks???

**Atsumu:** I do be feeling bad because you didn’t have to come all the way over here

**Atsumu:** At least stay and eat with us?

**Hinata:** Tobio says sure if you’re both okay with that

**Osamu:** Okay! See you guys soon

-

_ Tooru = horror _

**Hinata:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** So cute

**Osamu:** He’s gonna see this picture tomorrow and hate you

**Hinata:** it’s okay, I’m letting him borrow my boyfriend so he can’t say anything

**Kenma:** ???? Borrowing your boyfriend what???

**Hinata:** Lmao he just sorta started crying on Kageyama’s shoulder and Kageyama looked so uncomfortable because he didn’t know what to do

**Hinata:** So I told him to just pat his head or cuddle him or something lol

**Hinata:** Just stuff that would make me feel better because whenever I’m sad and Tobio hugs me all my problems just go away

**Kenma:** Okay good. I thought you meant a throuple kinda thing

**Hinata:** Never 🙃

**Osamu:** lmaooooo

**Kenma:** I feel so bad for Atsumu

**Kenma:** Like I wish I could do something

**Osamu:** Just give him time I guess

**Osamu:** I’ve never seen him like this before so I’m trying to find out what helps too

**Osamu:** My baby bro 🥺💔💔😿

**Atsumu:** samu STOP LMAO

**Kenma:** lmaooo 

**-**

**Suna** and  **Osamu**

**Osamu:** Good morning 

**Osamu:** I’m missing the cutest man in the world so much today

**Suna:** Lmao good morning

**Suna:** I miss you ❤️

**Osamu:** I miss you moreee❤️

**Suna:** How’s Tsumu??

**Osamu:** He’s alright

**Osamu:** Still sad but he’s spending less time alone

**Osamu:** He just kinda watches movies with me but it’s better than when he was just in his room

**Osamu:** And he’s eating a lot more now

**Osamu:** Like while I’m cooking he’ll come and sit at the table and wait

**Suna:** Kita said he’s gonna call me tonight 

**Osamu:** Ooooh okay

**Osamu:** Hopefully he’s okay. I tried calling him but he hasn’t answered

**Suna:** yeah

**Suna:** I text him everyday just to check on him

**Suna:** I just want to help them but I feel like I can’t omg

**Osamu:** yeah, the most we can do is just be with them 

**Osamu:** Well, as much as they let us

**Osamu:** Atsumu might go crazy at home with me but that’s kinda my goal

**Osamu:** If he gets annoyed with me he’ll talk more so I get off his back. That or he’ll leave

**Osamu:** He doesn’t have to tell me everything but if it’s bothering him I want him to talk to somebody, you know? 

**Suna:** What a good big bro 😌

**Osamu:** ikr??? 😌

**Osamu:** okay well I gotta make my cockroach of a twin some coffee or he won’t get up

**Osamu:** I’ll talk to you later babe

**Suna:** Okay lmao keep me updated with Tsumu please!!

**Osamu:** I will

**Osamu:** ❤️

**Suna:** ❤️

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was bored so I 💅🏻ruined👊🏻 lunch 🥵 purposely😌 and I had 🤧fun🤷🏻♀️ doing it🐥🙊


	131. this is so long and serious for no reason but wolfstar brain rot wolfstar brain rot wolfstar brain rot OMG WOLFSTAR JUST RAISING HARRY OMG THAT FIC I'M WRITING WHERE THEY'RE RAISING HIM AND JUST IN LOVE AHHHH anyways I just want to tell you 🙃 it takes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Osamu: And Rintarou and I getting something in a different isle
> 
> Atsumu: You guys were kissing in the parking lot
> 
> Osamu: Rintarou and I WERE GETTING SOMETHING IN A DIFFERENT ISLE

**Osamu** and  **Suna:**

**Osamu:** I know I said I was going to bed but

**Osamu:** Has Kita called you yet?

**Suna:** No

**Suna:** I called him and he declined the call

**Suna:** He texted me and said he’d call me in a few days

**Suna:** I’m kind of worried about him, if I’m being honest

**Osamu:** Ahhhhh

**Osamu:** Okay. I’m going to bed. Let me know what happens, alright? 

**Suna:** Of course

**Osamu:** I love you Rintarou ❤️

**Suna:** I love you too Osamu ❤️

-

**Osamu** changed the group name to  _ horrors _

**Sugawara:** What?

**Oikawa:** Oh god

**Oikawa:** what happened?

**Osamu:** Something disgusting 🤢

**Kenma:** What?

**Suna:** You’re being stupid

**Suna:** You’re being literally so stupid

**Osamu:** IDK WHAT YOU MEAN RINTAROU

**Kenma:** Omg just spit it out

**Osamu:** KENMA YOU HAVE NO PATIENCE

**Kenma:** Esp when it comes to the Miya twins ❤️

**Osamu:** SO I WAS AT THE STORE WITH TSUMU AND RINTAROU RIGHT

**Osamu:** And we were getting flowers because Rintarou has a relative that just got out of the hospital so we were all going to go and say hello and drop off some flowers

**Osamu:** And Rintarou and I getting something in a different isle

**Atsumu:** You guys were kissing in the parking lot

**Osamu:** Rintarou and I WERE GETTING SOMETHING IN A DIFFERENT ISLE

**Osamu:** So Atsumu was taking care of the flowers, and telling the sales lady what we wanted and everything and then I went to go see what was taking him so long

**Osamu:** And 🤢 this lady was flirting with him 🤮

**Osamu:** AND SHE SEES ME AND GOES 

**Osamu:** omg 😳 are you two twins? 😏

**Suna:** HAHA IT’S STILL MAKING ME LAUGH

**Osamu:** AND I WAS LIKE

**Osamu:** no

**Iwaizumi:** IDIOT

**Osamu:** SHUT TF UP??

**Osamu:** And she looked embarrassed but then she was just like wow! You guys look exactly the same! That’s crazy!

**Osamu:** so 🤢 not only did her mind GO THERE FOR A SECOND 🤢

**Osamu:** But I was also told I LOOK THE SAME AS TSUMU 

**Suna:** *exactly the same

**Osamu:** Gross 🤢

**Hinata:** ...You guys do look the same though

**Suna:** Samu you’re so stupid

**Suna:** Anyways. Hurry up and get in the car, we need to leave

**Osamu:** I’M TRYING BUT ATSUMU WON’T COME OUT OF HIS ROOM

**Atsumu:** I don’t want to go

**Osamu:** PLEASE

**Sugawara:** ATSUMU COME ON

**Oikawa:** ATSUMU

**Kageyama:** Atsumu go

**Kenma:** ATSUMU GOOOO

**Hinata:** GO ATSUMU GO GO 

**Atsumu:** omg fine

**Suna:** Yay! My aunt will be excited to see you!

**Suna:** She loves you guys for some reason

**Osamu:** Because we’re perfect 👼👼

**Suna:** sure

-

**Osamu:** Omg my baby bro is so cute 👼💙

**Kageyama:** Awww

**Kageyama:** Why are you still being a freak?

**Kageyama:** But also what is he doing?

**Osamu:** I’m going to ignore that freak comment 💆

**Osamu:** And so omg Suna’s aunt is obsessed with Atsumu for some reason 

**Osamu:** And she’s giving him the whole ‘you look like you haven’t been eating’ speech

**Osamu:** So she wanted to get up to make him some food because that’s just how she is

**Osamu:** And Atsumu ❤️❣️

**Osamu:** My twin 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️👼

**Osamu:** My cute little bro 👨‍👩‍👦‍👦💞

**Atsumu:** 🙄

**Osamu:** Is making all of us dinner now 💝💛

**Osamu:** Rintarou I think your aunt wants to marry him

**Suna:** Probably not ❤️

**Suna:** She’s a lesbian who hates men ❤️

**Sugawara:** We love to see it 🥰

**Suna:** Unless it’s the stupid Miya twins apparently 

**Suna:** I think Atsumu is her favorite though

**Suna:** Sorry Osamu

**Osamu:** It’s okay it’s what Atsumu deserves 🥰❤️

**Osamu:** Because he’s my awesome little bro 😋👼

**Atsumu:** Shut up or I’m not making your plate

**Osamu:** YOU’RE MAKING THE PLATES TOO??

**Atsumu:** Yes

**Osamu:** Twin 🥺❤️

**Atsumu:** Please stop omg

\--

**Oikawa:** Atsumu~!

**Oikawa:** I have the most perfect idea in the universe!!

**Atsumu:** What?

**Oikawa:** So you’re still sad over Kita right?

**Sugawara:** ...😬

**Hinata:** 😧

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru.

**Oikawa:** I’M JUST ASKING?

**Atsumu:** Um, yeah

**Atsumu:** I think I’m doing better though

**Oikawa:** That’s good!!!

**Oikawa:** I have an idea though!!!

**Oikawa:** I know someone who might be able to make this all a little easier

**Oikawa:** If you know what I mean 😋

**Iwaizumi:** What.

**Osamu:** ...

**Osamu:** Who?

**Oikawa:** Sakusa Kiyoomi!!!!

**Akaashi:** Omgomg

**Kageyama:** ...Omg

**Atsumu:** No.

**Oikawa:** Awww come on!! That’s what I always did to get over break ups, and it worked fine! Plus Sakusa is hot

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru, you did that to ’get over break-ups’ because you didn’t actually care about the person breaking up with you

**Oikawa:** Not true Iwa-chan!!

**Atsumu:** I know Sakusa. He and I kind of dated a year or so ago and like

**Osamu:** WHAT???

**Atsumu:** Idk it just didn’t work out like right off the bat. I don’t mind him because there’s not really any hard feelings but I don’t think I would be able to 

**Atsumu:** Plus, idk. Maybe if it was like, after my breakup with Kageyama I’d be more willing to do something like that, but I just feel like it would be rude to Kita

**Atsumu:** It would just feel wrong

**Oikawa:** You don’t have to feel like that, though. Like you’re not betraying him or whatever you’re thinking!!

**Oikawa:** He broke up with you, obviously he doesn’t care about what you’re doing with your life

**Iwaizumi:** TOORU

**Hinata:** TOORU

**Kageyama:** OIKAWA

**Kenma:** TOORU

**Atsumu:** Yeah

**Atsumu:** Thanks for the reminder

**Atsumu** has left the chat

**Oikawa:** WAIT I’M SORRY

**Oikawa:** But also ???

**Osamu:** Dude

**Iwaizumi:** I’m so sorry omfg

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru, you’re so insensitive when it comes to break-ups

**Oikawa:** I think I’m just treating him like how I usually treat myself after a break-up!

**Iwaizumi:** So you’d want to be talked to like that if I broke up with you?

**Oikawa:** …

**Sugawara:** oikawa i love you but you’re so thoughtless with feelings sometimes

**Oikawa:** FUCK

**Oikawa:** AHHH I’M SORRY 

**Oikawa:** I’M GOING TO APOLOGIZE TO HIM RN

**Kenma:** GOOD

\--

**Atsumu** and  **Oikawa**

_ Incoming call from:  _ **_Oikawa Tooru_ **

\--

_ horrors _

**Oikawa** added  **Atsumu** to the chat

**Osamu:** BABY BRO 💞👼

**Osamu:** Angel Twin👼👼

**Osamu:** Darling brother💞👨‍👩‍👦‍👦

**Atsumu:** SHUT UP OMFG

**Kenma:** Hey don’t fight 😠

**Atsumu:** Ugh 

**Kageyama:** Omg

**Kageyama:** Wait

**Hinata:** teehee teehee 

**Sugawara:** Wut

**Kenma:** Wut

**Atsumu:** Wut

**Kageyama:** SHOUYOU CHANGED ALL MY CONTACTS???

**Hinata:** Teehee

**Oikawa:** AHAHAHA

**Oikawa:** WAIT

**Oikawa:** WHAT DID HE CHANGE MINE TOO??

**Kageyama:** great king tingz✨👑

**Oikawa:** SHOUYOU WTF

**Kuroo:** WAIT WHAT ABOUT ME

**Kageyama:** He didn’t change yours

**Hinata:** Yes I did, I changed it to ‘kenma’s ugly boyfriend’

**Kuroo:** Well

**Kuroo:** At least I’m Kenma’s 😻

**Oikawa:** AHAHAH

**Sugawara:** It’s what you deserve Kuroo

**Sugawara:** Also what am I?!

**Kageyama:** has a daddy kink🙀

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA

**Kuroo:** WHAT’S KENMA’S

**Kuroo:** I know he won’t ask but I’m curious

**Kageyama:** kitten 🤢

**Kuroo:** HINATA 

**Hinata:** 🙂

**Kenma:** AHAHAHA

**Tsukishima:** …

**Kageyama:** Yours is just ew

**Tsukishima:** Wow

**Osamu:** WHAT ABOUT ME

**Kageyama:** ‘the miya i didn’t date’

**Atsumu:** AHAHAHAHAHA

**Osamu:** AHAHAHAHA

**Osamu:** Wow omg twin our brains are connected 🥰💆

**Atsumu:** SHUT UP OMG

**Kenma:** NO NO GET ALONG

**Atsumu** and  **Kageyama:**

**Kageyama:** Are you alright?

**Atsumu:** Totally fine!!!!!:-)

**Kageyama:** You’re… lying

**Atsumu:** No!!!!!!!

**Kageyama:** No?

**Atsumu:** IT’S JUST THAT LIKE

**Atsumu:** Ugh

**Kageyama:** Ugh?

**Atsumu:** UGH KAGEYAMA

**Atsumu:** I HATE YOU

**Atsumu:** HOW DO YOU ALWAYS KNOW WHEN I’M CRYING

**Atsumu:** DO YOU HAVE A SIXTH SENSE OR SOMETHING

**Kageyama:** Yes it’s called One Of My Idiots Needs Help :-)

**Kageyama:** It works only for you, Hinata, Tsukishima, and Suga tho

**Atsumu:** I hate you

**Kageyama:** Yeah

**Kageyama:** So ?

**Kageyama:** Do you want to talk about it?

**Atsumu:** No

**Kageyama:** Okay

**Atsumu:** OMG

**Atsumu:** OK LIKE IT’S SO STUPID

**Atsumu:** IT’S BEEN ALMOST THREE WEEKS AND KITA AND I ONLY DATED FOR SEVEN MONTHS BUT LIKE

**Atsumu:** WE WERE GOING TO GET A DOG TOGETHER AND NAME IT MAME

**Atsumu:** THERE’S THIS ICE CREAM SHOP THAT’S OPENING BY MY HOUSE IN LIKE A MONTH AND WE WERE GOING TO GO TOGETHER

**Atsumu:** I WANTED TO BE THERE WITH HIM WHEN HE GRADUATES AND I WANTED HIM TO BE THERE WHEN I GRADUATE

**Atsumu:** I WANTED HIM TO GO TO ALL OF MY VOLLEYBALL GAMES AND WHEN I’M FAMOUS AS FUCK FOR HOW AWESOME I AM I WANTED HIM TO SIT IN THE CROWD WATCHING ME OR SEE ME ON TV AND LISTEN TO PEOPLE TALK ABOUT HOW AWESOME I AM AND ALWAYS SMILE THAT CUTE SMILE BECAUSE I’M HIS

**Atsumu:** BECAUSE I WAS HIS 100% AND I THOUGHT HE WAS MINE BUT I GUESS HE DIDN’T FEEL THAT WAY

**Atsumu:** And I’m still so in love with him and I feel like this is never going to get better

**Atsumu:** I haven’t even deleted all of the pictures of us together because I can’t bring myself to

**Atsumu:** He’s so beautiful. And his smile is literally the best thing I’ve ever seen

**Atsumu:** I could look at him ALL DAY BUT HE DOESN’T WANT THAT

**Atsumu:** I thought we were happy

**Atsumu:** And like we got into a stupid argument about distance, because I was asking what we could do because I didn’t want to be apart like that forever. I didn’t want to be so far from him anymore

**Atsumu:** And he told me he didn’t want to leave his dad, because he’s helping him out and everything, which is fair

**Atsumu:** And we were just arguing about that and I was a dick and told him that he can’t just put his life on pause to do that. Like, he had to take a semester off of school for it because he had to start working and couldn’t go to school that far. He has other family that can help him if he needs

**Atsumu:** I KNOW IT’S HYPOCRITICAL OF ME TO SAY BUT LIKE IT’S OKAY TO ASK FOR HELP?? AND I WAS TRYING TO EXPLAIN THAT

**Atsumu:** I’d probably do the same thing in his situation but like

**Atsumu:** It was probably stupid of me to say anything at all

**Atsumu:** TOBIO I DON’T WANT TO TYPE ANYMORE I’M CRYING TOO HARD 

_ Incoming call from:  _ **Ex boyfriend 😧🤯🤬😛🙃**

**\--**

**Suna** and  **Kita**

_ Incoming call from  _ **Kita Shinsuke**

**_Suna:_ ** _ Hello? _

**_Kita:_ ** _ Hi…  _

**_Suna:_ ** _ Hi…? How are you doing? _

**_Kita:_ ** _ … _

**_Suna:_ ** _ Kita? Are you okay? _

**_Kita:_ ** _ I think I’m an idiot _

**_Suna:_ ** _ Is this about Atsumu? _

**_Kita:_ ** _ Of course it is _

**_Suna:_ ** _ … _

**_Kita:_ ** _ He left his shirt here. _

**_Suna:_ ** _...Are you calling me to tell me that he left his shirt at your house? _

**_Kita:_ ** _ No… I miss him so much, but I’m afraid to text or call him. He probably doesn’t want to talk to me- _

**_Suna_ ** _ : If you miss him, why did you break up with him in the first place? _

**_Kita:_ ** _ It’s stupid _

**_Suna:_ ** _ It probably isn’t, Kita.  _

**_Kita:_ ** _ I just… Every relationship I’ve had I’ve kinda always, like, broke it off really early on when there was some kind of argument?  _

**_Suna:_ ** _ ..Why? _

**_Kita:_ ** _ The first boyfriend I had, he was really toxic and controlling, and all we’d do was argue, but I stayed with him for so long because I love him and everyone told me it would get easier and it never fucking did. And I had such a big issue with opening up to people after that because I just didn’t trust them. And when I started dating again, it would be fun but then we’d start arguing and I got so scared because I was so worried that it would go downhill and I’d have to live through that again. It was probably stupid of me to run from every relationship just because of a possibility, but.. I don’t know _

**_Suna:_ ** _ You were trying to protect yourself in the only way you knew how to. I don’t think that was stupid of you. I’m sorry that happened to you, though, Kita, I didn’t know _

**_Kita:_ ** _ A lot of people don’t. It’s not like it was recent-- it was a long time ago. Like, we started dating when we got into middle school, and all the way to, like, the first or second year of high school. We were definitely way too young to be in such a serious relationship. But I just felt so trapped, and I didn’t know what to do. And I never want to feel like that again, so I guess I run from things. And usually when I break up with someone, neither of us are too invested in the relationship anyways. But… No one has ever looked at me the way that Atsumu did when I broke up with him. It was horrible, Suna. _

**_Suna:_ ** _ Yeah… He told me he cried the whole train ride home _

**_Kita:_ ** _ Oh, god. Why would you tell me that? Oh my god.  _

**_Suna:_ ** _ … _

**_Kita:_ ** _ I thought I would be okay, because I always am, but… _

**_Suna:_ ** _ Kita? _

**_Kita:_ ** _ I can’t get him out of my head, and my bed feels so empty, and his stupid shirt smells so good and when I can’t stop crying it helps me calm down because of how comforting it is, but I ruined everything and he probably hates me. _

**_Suna:_ ** _ He doesn’t hate you _

**_Kita:_ ** _ You don’t know that. _

**_Suna:_ ** _ I’ve literally been at his house for the past two weeks. So, yes, I do know that. I’ve never seen him so upset over someone. I think this was definitely something that got blown a bit out of proportion. You were scared, and you ran. That might be what you do, but he doesn’t know that. He thinks he did something wrong.  _

**_Kita:_ ** _ … _

**_Suna:_ ** _ He doesn’t hate you. I think you guys just need to talk to each other, because I love you, Kita, and I understand why you did what you did, but it was a little stupid. You can’t let one bad experience scare you away from something like this. Atsumu loves you so much. You have nothing to be worried about.  _

**_Kita:_ ** _ I don’t know how to reach out to him. _

**_Suna:_ ** _ You know his address, and his phone number _

**_Kita:_ ** _ …You’re right. _

**_Kita:_ ** _ I have to go. _

_ Call from:  _ **_Kita Shinsuke_ ** _ ended.  _

\--

**Suna** and  **Osamu**

**Suna:** Hellooo lover ❤️

**Suna:** Let’s go do something in like an hour!

**Osamu:** Omg hi babe!! I’ve been thinking about you all morning!!!

**Suna:** Aw, needy bitch ❤️

**Osamu:** ❤️🥺

**Osamu:** Where do you want to go?

**Suna:** Let’s go to your favorite coffee place!!! ❤️

**Suna:** Um.. but. Don’t invite Atsumu

**Osamu:** Okay???

**Suna:** Okay! See you in an hour!

**Osamu:** Um suna??

**Suna:** Love you!!!

**Osamu:** I love you too??

\--

_ horrors _

**Atsumu** changed the group name to  _ :-) _

**Kageyama:** Atsumu!!!

**Atsumu:** TOBIO!!! :-)

**Osamu:** OMG

**Osamu:** I THINK I’M GOING TO CRY RN

**Atsumu:** No what lol don’t

**Osamu:** ATSUMU I HAVEN’T SEEN YOU SMILE THIS MUCH IN WEEKS

**Atsumu:** Stop omg

**Osamu:** OMFG

**Sugawara:** Awww Atsumu!! I’m glad to see that you’re in a good mood!!!

**Kenma:** Yeah!!! It’s so nice!

**Kenma:** Did something happen?

**Atsumu:** WHY DOES SOMETHING NEED TO HAPPEN FOR ME TO BE HAPPY??

**Kenma:** …

**Atsumu:** YES something did happen

**Kenma:** You’re so dramatic

**Atsumu:** :-)

**Atsumu:** :-) :-)

**Atsumu** added  **Kita** to the group

**Sugawara:** KITA OMFG I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!!!

**Kita:** Really?

**Sugawara:** YESS

**Oikawa:** KITA OMG

**Kenma:** KITAAAA

**Atsumu:** :-) :-)

**Osamu:** I’m so glad things got worked out Twin 👼

**Atsumu:** CAN YOU STOP CALLING ME THAT

**Osamu:** Sorry baby bro 😹 I’m just riding the wave 🏄‍♂️ of happiness 😊

**Osamu:** Our Twin brains are connected 😎

**Osamu:** Your happiness is my happiness 🤣

**Osamu:** I’m so happy for u

**Kita:** Why are you talking like that?

**Atsumu:** Kita he’s been doing it to me FOR THREE WEEKS

**Kita:** Oh my 

**Kita:** I’m sorry

**Atsumu:** NO

**Atsumu:** IT’S OKAY

**Atsumu:** LET’S GO BACK TO BULLYING OSAMU

**Osamu:** Twin…😧

**Osamu:** I treat you like a GOD 🕺

**Osamu:** I treat you SO GOOD 💆🏻‍♂️

**Osamu:** BETTER THAN I HAVE IN YEARS

**Osamu:** And this is my payment?

**Oikawa:** OSAMU SHUT UP OMG

**Hinata:** PLEASE HAHA

**Osamu:** HAHA I CAN’T

**Osamu:** I’M ACTUALLY SO HAPPY ABOUT TSUMU AND KITA

**Kageyama:** Awwww!!!!

**Atsumu:** SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** OSAMU YOU’RE BEING SO CUTE

**Suna:** Hey 😡

**Kuroo:** BACK OFF SUNA HE’S MINE RN🤤

**Suna:** HEY 🤬

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you guys like Harry Potter? As your mothers, it's important we know this stuff


	132. So I started this and it made sense and then I kinda forgot where I was going with it but literally as I wrote this I could see it in my brainnnn so hopefully it's like that for you too. Anyways thinking about making 50000 edits just so I can laugh

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: ✨no💫
> 
> Kenma: Go die

_:-)_

**Kunimi:** Oikawa’s is listening to Taylor Swift rn

 **Oikawa:** KUNIMI STOP STALKING MY SPOTIFY

 **Kuroo:** PERIODT AS FUCK OIKAWA WHAT ALBUM

 **Oikawa:** Red

 **Kuroo:** As you should

 **Kunimi:** Nerd

 **Oikawa:** It doesn’t distract me when I’m doing homework omg

 **Iwaizumi:** We sleep with low music on too lol

 **Iwaizumi:** Oikawa needs some kind of noise

 **Kunimi:** what a freak

 **Oikawa:** I thought the bitch who stanned Halsey AND Melanie but NOT PARAMORE SAID SOMETHING

 **Kunimi:** Okay wow someone got defensive so quick

 **Kindaichi:** Akira

 **Kindaichi:** You never stanned paramore?

 **Kunimi:** No

 **Iwaizumi:** Not even a little bit?

 **Kunimi:** Nope

 **Kageyama:** So crushcrushcrush meant nothing to you?

 **Kunimi:** Wut

 **Sugawara:** So Misery Business meant nothing to you?

 **Kunimi:** wut

 **Hinata:** So Still Into You didn’t give you a DROP OF SEROTONIN

 **Yamaguchi:** KUNIMI DID THE TWILIGHT SOUNDTRACK MEAN NOTHING TO YOU?

 **Nishinoya:** You missed out on such an iconic part of life wtf

 **Nishinoya:** The self titled album is ICONIC IT’S A NECESSITY

 **Asahi:** Rose-colored Boy?????

 **Kiyoko:** Fake Happy????????

 **Oikawa:** Ah Iwa-chan, I got the chills

 **Kenma:** I’m disappointed in you Kunimi

 **Yamaguchi:** Me too

 **Kunimi:** whaT GUYS STOP

 **Kunimi:** YAMAGUCHI BABY NO PLEASE

 **Yamaguchi:** Tsukki likes Paramore

 **Kunimi:** Yamaguchi please

 **Oikawa:** Periodt

 **Oikawa** changed the group name to _Stan Hayley Williams_

 **Kunimi:** Why is this so important to everyone

 **Kageyama:** …

 **Hinata:** …

 **Yamaguchi:** … 

**Sugawara:** … 

**Kindaichi:** … 

**Oikawa:** … 

**Iwaizumi:** … 

**Kita:** … 

**Akaashi:** …

 **Kenma:** … 

**Yaku:** … 

**Kunimi:** I hate you all 🙃

-

**Oikawa:** Everyone

 **Oikawa:** Get on Among us right now

 **Sugawara:** You guys get to see Daichi’s cute character! 

**Oikawa:** I’m gonna spoil it for you. Daichi is orange with the cowboy hat and it’s not cute at all

 **Sugawara:** Nooo, he looks so cute

 **Oikawa:** Suga…

 **Oikawa:** Whatever

 **Kenma:** Get Discord

 **Oikawa:** ✨no💫

 **Kenma:** Go die

 **Kenma:** It’s easier with Discord I promise

 **Oikawa:** You’re easier with Discord

 **Kenma:** I hate everyone here but I hate you the most, Oikawa

 **Oikawa:** We can just do a group phone callllll or something

 **Kenma:** You’re dead to me, whatever then

-

**Calling Kenma, Kuroo, Sugawara, Daichi, Nishinoya, Asahi, Iwaizumi, Oikawa, Atsumu, Osamu**

**_Kuroo:_ ** _I’ve never played before_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _Already making excuses?_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _hey man_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _MY BOYFRIEND IS DEAD ALREADY WHAT THE HELL WHO CARES IF THIS IS KUROO’S FIRST GAME_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _Um wow_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _Was there anyone by the body when you found him?_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _Nope_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _Sounds like a self report_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _I would never kill my darling Asahi_

 **_Kenma_ ** _: lmao Where’s the body?_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _med bay_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _I skipped_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _WHAT WHY DID YOU GUYS VOTE ME I REPORTED THE BODY_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _KENMA AND SUGA WHY DID YOU VOTE ME_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _Everyone mute_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _KENMA_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _Noya, no one was around you so it made sense. Mute your mic_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _So you decide to throw the game????_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _It’s only the first death_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _Whatever, I’ll be with my Asahi in hell then_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _DAMMIT NOYA MUTE YOURSELF_

**-**

**_Kenma:_ ** _Alright guys so I just saw Osamu vent_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _KENMA WHAT YOU DID NOT I WAS WITH YOU THE ENTIRE TIME_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _No you weren’t I was doing wires and I was heading to card swipe and you vented_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _Vote Osamu because he’s stupid_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _THERE IS NO TRUST IN OUR FRIENDSHIP_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _Not when you’re the imposter_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _KENMA WHY DID YOU HAVE TO TELL THEM_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO DIE_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _Okay guys one more imposter_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _Period_

**-**

**_Oikawa:_ ** _PINK ITS PINK_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _IT IS NOT_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _YOU’RE THE ONLY ONE ON THIS SIDE AND YOU WALKED OUT OF ELECTRICAL. THAT’S WHERE I FOUND THE BODY_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _WELL BITCH MAYBE YOU’RE BLIND_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _ALSO I WANTED TO BE PINK SO I WANT TO VOTE YOU OUT EVEN MORE_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _WOW AT LEAST DAICHI DIDN’T VOTE FOR ME_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _I feel weirdly betrayed. We were together the entire time and you didn’t kill me_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _I could never kill the love of my life_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _If I get imposter I won’t kill you then_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _Stop flirting like freaks and play again_

**_-_ **

**_Nishinoya:_ ** _ASAHI IS DEAD AGAIN_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _GUYS ITS ATSUMU_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _IT IS NOT YOU FUCKING LIAR_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _I SAW YOU KILL HIM_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _Poor guy went back to check his samples…_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _Please let Asahi live for longer than one round. My poor Asahi hasn’t even gotten a taste of the game yet_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _So are we voting Atsumu?_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _ARE YOU SERIOUS_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _I was in admin so i have no idea what’s happening_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _Yeah, I was with him_

 **_Iwaizumi:_ ** _I’m voting Atsumu_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _SO YOU’RE JUST GOING TO BELIEVE YOUR EX WOW_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _Good point, I’m voting Osamu_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _Queen shit_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _OKAY BUT EVERYONE ELSE VOTED ME FUCK ALL OF YOU_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _Baby bro, mute yourself_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _I HATE YOU_

**-**

**_Sugawara:_ ** _So uh…_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _Osamu did downloads pretty quickly…_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _I was doing wires?_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _No, you were next to wires, at downloads_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _Maybe you’re wrong_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _Well, I’m voting Osamu_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _Me too_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _DAICHI WHY_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _Because Suga said to?_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _FORM YOUR OWN OPINIONS_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _He did, his opinion is he thinks I’m right SO DON’T YELL AT HIM_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _I fucking hate this town_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _AND OIKAWA AND IWAIZUMI JUST SILENTLY VOTE ME TOO AWESOME THANKS_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _AND NOYA THANKS_

 **_Noya:_ ** _Asahi, maybe you’ll get to play next round!_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW OSAMU THREW ME UNDER THE BUS_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _I can’t lie to our friends_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _YOU WERE AN IMPOSTER TOO_

 **_Iwaizumi:_ ** _Stupid_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _Play again?_

**-**

**_Nishinoya:_ ** _ASAHI IS DEAD AGAIN??? WHY DO YOU HATE HIM SO MUCH_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _Storage by the way_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _I just saw Kuro leave storage_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _KENMA WHAT_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _I was leaving electrical because I went to fix lights_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _I saw you_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _I was walking through storage to catch up with you because the lights went out_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _So lights go out, Asahi dies and then you leave storage?_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _Sounds sus_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _Vote black_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _Kitten why_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _I’m always down to vote Kuroo_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _Suga…_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _Asahi was just trying to empty the chutes. My poor innocent Asahi_

 **_Iwaizumi:_ ** _OIKAWA FUCKING VOTE_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _IWA-CHAN SORRY I WAS ON TIK TOK_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _Goodbye forever I guess_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _We’re literally gonna see you at the end of the game_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _Me and Asahi will be in the dead baddies chat. You’d be in there too… If you were dead…. So sucks to suck_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _Mute Kuroo_

**-**

**_Iwaizumi:_ ** _Daichi what_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _What?_

 **_Iwaizumi:_ ** _You’re just gonna kill Samu and vent away?_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _Daichi was with me in weapons_

 **_Iwaizumi:_ ** _he vented into Nav. Saw him hop back in right as I got there_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _Daichi oh my god_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _Oops I guess_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _You really didn’t kill me!_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _I told you I wouldn’t_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _What a gentleman. Daichi I love you so much_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _Stop doing whatever this is and vote_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _Oops, sorry_

**_-_ **

**_Kuroo:_ ** _I told you guys it wasn’t me_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _But if you did your tasks, we could have won_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _You have tasks as a ghost?_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _Kuroo I-_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _I DIDN’T KNOW, THAT’S WHY I FOLLOW KENMA_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _I JUST FOLLOW TO WHERE HE NEEDS TO GO AND IF IT LIGHTS UP YELLOW, I CLICK IT_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _There’s a map that tells you where you need to go_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _And a task list_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _WHAT_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _Kuroo…_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _KENMA WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _Because you’re easy to frame_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _KENMA_

 **_Kenma:_ ** _One more game?_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _Yes_

**-**

**_Sugawara:_ ** _I found Asahi in shields_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _He hasn’t played one round successfully_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _Anyone near?_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _Nope_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _So my brain is huge, practically bulging out of my head_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _Oh?_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _Biggest brain. Are you ready?_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _Lay it on us, baby bro_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _I hate you_

 ** _Atsumu:_** _Anyways,_ _Nishinoya has been awfully silent. He usually reports Asahi’s body_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _That’s true_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _I KEPT MYSELF MUTED BECAUSE I COULDN’T STOP LAUGHING. ASAHI I’M SORRY, YOU’RE JUST ALWAYS OFF BY YOURSELF DOING TASKS_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _Baby bro, your IQ is amazing_

 **_Atsumu:_ ** _I know_

 **_Nishinoya:_ ** _VOTE ME SO I CAN BE WITH ASAHI. I KILLED MY OWN BOYFRIEND_

**_-_ **

**_Oikawa:_ ** _VOTE KUROO RIGHT NOW_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _HE VENTED I WATCHED HIM_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _The way he voted for you what_

 **_Kuroo:_ ** _I HATE YOU OIKAWA YOU SHOULD HAVE KEPT IT A SECRET_

 **_Iwaizumi:_ ** _Oikawa you literally ran over me to get to the emergency button_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _Wait I DIDN’T KNOW YOU WERE DEAD WHAT_

 **_Iwaizumi:_ ** _Kuroo vented because he just killed me_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _YOU KILLED MY BOYFRIEND YOU FUCKER_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _Don’t you guys think Daichi’s character looks cute?_

 **_Osamu:_ ** _he’s literally just a color…_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _He looks cute_

 **_Oikawa:_ ** _Well, goodnight everyone!_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _NO WHAT DON’T LEAVE YET I HATE YOU COME BACK AND APPRECIATE DAICHI’S CUTE CHARACTER WHY ARE YOU ALL LEAVING_

 **_Iwaizumi:_ ** _I think the cowboy hat is fitting_

 **_Sugawara:_ ** _Right?_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _me too._

 **_Iwaizumi:_ ** _Goodnight guys_

 **_Daichi:_ ** _Goodnight Iwaizumi!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh so here's my attempt at the group chat playing Among Us. Someone suggested this, I think it was lxllipxp. Hopefully I'm not wrong because then I'll be embarrassed lmao. We missed you guys!! Thanks for the idea btw!!!


	133. i'm not saying i'm a tipsy as i write this but if there's typos it isn't my fault also i think atsukita has accidentally become my second fav ship in haikyuu um obviously not no. one becuase kuroken heart eyes however,,, kita,,, calling atsumu darlin',,,

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: Sorry, iwa-chan and I are busy 😚
> 
> Sugawara: Awww cute! Where are you going?
> 
> Oikawa: The movies!
> 
> Sugawara: I hope you choke on your popcorn and die then 😚

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this... is so atsukita heavy... oopsies ⏝💧〰️💧⏝

_ Stan Hayley Williams _

**Atsumu:** Guys guys GUYS

**Atsumu:** I’m playing among us with kita right now

**Atsumu:** AND HE’S SO ANGRY?

**Atsumu:** Like he’s getting so mad at everyone for the smallest things

**Atsumu:** like literally someone voted for him as the imposter and he wouldn’t stop ranting about it for like ten minutes

**Osamu:** Suna and I don’t believe you, that’s too out of character

**Suna:** Atsumu is sus, vote him out

**Osamu:** Kita isn’t an angry person

**Osamu:** Stupid idot

**Kageyama:** Idot

**Oikawa:** Idot

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan keep it going

**Iwaizumi:** No

**Oikawa:** Ok sorry, I didn’t know u still had feelings for your ex….

**Osamu:** I-Iwa-chan?? (〃/ω＼〃)

**Oikawa:** Um firstly, don’t call him that, secondly, that face is ugly, thirdly, i’m going to kill u right now

**Kenma:** Oh wow

**Osamu:** AHAHA

**Atsumu:** SAMU WTF GO AWAY I WAS TALKING FIRST

**Osamu:** It’s not my fault you’re lying about Kita for no reason

**Osamu:** Come up with something a little more realistic next time if you want to keep a relevant conversation 😘

**Suna:** Yeah, idot

**Osamu:** RIN STOP

**Atsumu:** I’M NOT LYING

**Osamu:** Kita doesn’t get angry like that lol

**Sugawara:** YEAH

**Atsumu:** SUGA YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW KITA IRL

**Sugawara:** SO?

**Kita:** Lol guys leave tsumu alone

**Kita:** It’s true

**Kita:** These among us servers make me so mad

**Kita:** Idk why though

**Kita:** Like Tsumu and I were on facetime and playing together

**Kita:** And like that’s fine and all but we kept finding so many annoying bitches

**Sugawara:** 😳

**Osamu:** AHAHA

**Atsumu:** SEE

**Kita:** Like this one person had a MELANIE MARTINEZ NAME?

**Kita:** And kept coming for me?? And saying I was the imposter??

**Kita:** Um??

**Kita:** Anyways I killed them the next round so it’s not like it matters anyway

**Kita:** Have fun being hated by me for the rest of your life

**Atsumu:** SHINSUKE PLEASE

**Kita:** Omg? And then Atsumu and I died? Like we both got killed. Which, whatever, we both suck so I guess we had it comin

**Sugawara:** …

**Sugawara:** KITA HAHA

**Kita:** AND THIS PERSON IN THE CHAT WAS BEING SO ANGRY LIK E

**Kita:** ‘i told u guys i wasn’t the imposter so this is what you get for voting me out’ and LIKE THEY WERE SPAMMING THE CHAT JUST BEING SO ANGRY

**Kita:** like… ok.. It’s a game... Cry about it somewhere else, idiot

**Atsumu:** Shinsuke…

**Kita:** Sorry darlin this game just pushes my buttons i guess lol

**Sugawara:** …

**Sugawara:** DARLIN..

**Kita:** Yes?

**Sugawara:** THAT’S CUTE

**Sugawara:** WTF

**Sugawara:** KITA YOU’RE SO CUTE

**Kita:** Aww thank you Suga!

**Sugawara:** CALL ME KOUSHI

**Kita:** Thank you Koushi!

**Sugawara:** ACTUALLY NO

**Sugawara:** CALL ME DARLIN

**Atsumu:** SUGAWARA STOP TRYING TO TAKE MY BOYFRIEND

**Sugawara:** KITA PLEASE CALL ME DARLIN

**Kita:** Okay darlin

**Sugawara:** OMG

**Daichi:** Suga lol

**Atsumu:** SUGAWARA GO AWAY

**Sugawara:** I will only because I have to get up for my classes kinda early tomorrow

**Sugawara:** KITA WILL YOU SAY GOODNIGHT TO ME???????

**Kuroo:** Sugawara 😍 attention whore 😋 Koushi 💋

**Sugawara:** KUROO I’LL KILL YOU

**Kita:** Lol

**Kita:** Goodnight darlin ❤️

**Sugawara:** I’M SCREAMINGGGG 

**Sugawara:** Okay goodnight you guys!!

**Atsumu:** Goodnight Suga! I hate you!

**Kuroo:** Good night!!

**Oikawa:** Night!!! ☆=(´ε｀*)

\--

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _ 💔 _

**Sugawara:** Who wants to be my new boyfriend? 💞

**Kuroo:** Um? What happened to my Daichi?

**Sugawara:** Kuroo I’ll kill you

**Sugawara:** Anyways he’s not my boyfriend anymore because I’m mad at him 💖

**Daichi:** Kou stop throwing a fit 

**Sugawara:** Sorry, it’s a policy of mine that I don’t talk to my exes until at least five months after the break up so I can get over them as quickly as possible 💋

**Daichi:** Koushi…

**Daichi:** Please stop pouting on the couch and come back to bed

**Sugawara:** You’re not my boyfriend anymore so I don’t have to listen to you 💝 

**Oikawa:** ...What happened?

**Sugawara:** Daichi is a jerk, that’s what happened 💅🏼

**Sugawara:** And I refuse to talk about it

**Kenma:** Suga your emojis rn lol

**Sugawara:** 💋💅🏼✨💌

**Oikawa:** You’re so annoying

**Oikawa:** akaashi or kita sweet talk him so he’ll talk~!

**Sugawara:** THAT WOULDN’T WORK ON ME WTF

**Kenma:** Akaashi is napping

**Kita:** What happened, darlin?

**Sugawara:** lol

**Sugawara:** Kita that’s still so cute

**Sugawara:** So I’m in the gardening club at my university right??

**Oikawa:** YOU ARE?!?!?!

**Kuroo:** WHAT

**Sugawara:** Yes

**Nishinoya:** SUGA THAT’S SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** I KNOW RIGHT

**Sugawara:** ANYWAYS WE’RE GOING SOMEWHERE AS A CLUB ACTIVITY THIS WEEKEND AND WE’RE ALLOWED TO BRING A DATE

**Daichi:** I HAVE WORK

**Sugawara:** YOU DON’T LOVE ME

**Sugawara:** IT’S LITERALLY A FREE MEAL DAICHI

**Sugawara:** IT’S A FLOWER CAFE

**Sugawara:** BUT THEY SERVE ACTUAL FOOD AND DRINKS

**Sugawara:** DAICHI YOU HATE ME

**Sugawara:** YOU THINK I’M UGLY

**Sugawara:** YOU DON’T WANT TO SEE ME SURROUNDED BY BEAUTIFUL FLOWERS

**Daichi:** I HAVE WORK

**Sugawara:** Anyways, Daichi doesn’t love me anymore so who wants to be my new boyfriend and our first date can be this weekend? 💌

**Oikawa:** Sorry, iwa-chan and I are busy 😚

**Sugawara:** Awww cute! Where are you going?

**Oikawa:** The movies!

**Sugawara:** I hope you choke on your popcorn and die then 😚

**Oikawa:** WOW

**Atsumu:** I would offer to but I’m going to Kageyama’s this weekend

**Sugawara:** KAGEYAMA NO!!

**Atsumu:** UM WOW

**Kita:** I’m free this weekend!

**Kita:** If you want

**Kita:** I know we haven’t actually met in person but I think it’ll be nice!

**Atsumu:** KITA

**Kita:** Tsumu you can come if you agree to treat us to drinks after :-)

**Atsumu:** SHINSUKE 

**Kita:** I’m kidding, darlin

**Kita:** But if I go, I can stop by and see you on my way home!

**Atsumu:** PLEASE

**Atsumu:** I MISS MY KITA KISSES

**Kageyama:** Cute omg

**Atsumu:** Tobio 😳

**Kageyama:** 😳

**Sugawara:** WAIT OMG

**Sugawara:** KITA

**Sugawara:** I WOULD LOVE THAT

**Sugawara:** While we’re at it let’s get married!!

**Kita:** lol

**Kita:** I’m not sure how happy Daichi would be with that

**Sugawara:** DAICHI IS DEAD TO ME

**Daichi:** You’re so ridiculous

**Daichi:** Come back to bed before I make you

**Kuroo:** UM

**Atsumu:** WOAH

**Sugawara:** Sorry, Daddy, I’m sleeping out here tonight 😋

**Daichi:** No you aren’t

**Oikawa:** This

**Oikawa:** Feels like a good time to switch over to a private chat you guys ❤️

**Sugawara:** Hm maybe you’re right

**Daichi:** Or you can just put your phone down…

**Sugawara:** That works too I guess😋

**Sugawara:** Kita! I’ll text you the details of the event later!

**Kita:** Okay!

**Atsumu:** Aww Shinsuke 

**Atsumu:** Look at you making friends w my friends 🥺

**Sugawara:** I’m not your friend Atsumu 😍

**Atsumu:** SUGA YOU’RE SO RUDE

**Daichi:** Suga…

**Sugawara:** Coming, Daddy! 😋

**Oikawa:** STOP

\--

**Sugawara:** KITA AND I ARE MEETING IRL TODAY

**Atsumu:** i wish i could meet kita irl

**Sugawara:** Too bad you aren’t his boyfriend like i am💋

**Kuroo:** HAHA

**Sugawara:** ANYWAYS AHH I’M SO EXCITED

**Sugawara:** he’s on the train rn

**Atsumu:** Aww so that’s why he isn’t responding to my texts

**Kenma:** Does he not go on his phone at all when he’s on the train?

**Atsumu:** No, he says it’s rude

**Atsumu:** he’s such a cute little old man 🧓

**Kuroo:** AHAHAHA

**Kuroo:** Anyway, Suga, have fun!

**Daichi:** Don’t drink at the cafe!!!

**Daichi:** I don’t want you to have to walk home drunk lol

**Sugawara:** Don’t tell me what to do!

**Daichi:** Whatever lol

-

**Sugawara:** GUYS OMG

**Sugawara:** KITA IS SO FUN

**Sugawara:** OMG

**Sugawara:** GUYS

**Sugawara:** We got drunk together ❤️

**Kita:** We got drunk togerher ❤️

**Sugawara:** Daichi I miss you ❤️

**Kita:** Tsumu I miss you ❤️

**Oikawa:** Oh god why are you guys copying each other

**Sugawara:** Because we’re in love now ❤️

**Kita:** Yeah ❤️

**Sugawara:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** We’re cuddling (.づ◡﹏◡)づ.

**Kita:** ⊂( ◜◒◝ )⊃

**Atsumu:** OMG OMG CUTE

**Kuroo:** THIS IS SO CUTE AHHHH

**Kuroo:** YOU TWO ARE SO CUTE

**Oikawa:** Cute!!!!!

**Oikawa:** Suga your pupils are so dilated lol

**Sugawara:** yeah ❤️

**Daichi:** Koushi I’m on my way home from work, do I need to pick you guys up from somewhere?

**Sugawara:** No we’re at home!

**Sugawara:** I listened to you and we didn’t drink anything until we got back!

**Daichi:** Oh good

**Daichi:** I’ll see you soon, baby, I love you

**Sugawara:** I love you too!

**Kita:** Atsumuuu are you still at Kageyama’s or did you already go all the way home?

**Atsumu:** I’m still at Kageyama’s! But I was going to leave soon!

**Kita:** Come take me home with youuuuu

**Atsumu:** (∩╹□╹∩)

**Atsumu:** Okay!! Of course baby!!

**Sugawara:** Daichi I miss you!!! Hurry up!! I just want to hug you!!!!

**Daichi:** Lol I’ll try to hurry

**Daichi:** Would you two like me to bring anything home?

**Kita:** No thank you 🙂

**Sugawara:** Can you bring us some of the cake slices from the cafe next to your work? 🥺

**Sugawara:** And maybe more stuff to drink? (っ⇀⑃↼)っ

**Daichi:** Loll

**Daichi:** Of course baby. I’ll probably be home in like 30 minutes

**Sugawara:** Okay!

**Atsumu:** Kita I’m leaving Kageyama’s in a few! I’ll probably be there in like 10 minutes

**Sugawara:** DAICHI RUN SO YOU BEAT ATSUMU

**Daichi:** No ❤️

-

**Atsumu:** Drunk Kita is so cute

**Suna:** WHAT’S HE DOING??

**Sugawara:** WHAT HE DOIN????? (.づσ▿σ)づ.

**Atsumu:** Suga you were there lol

**Daichi:** Koushi..

**Atsumu:** I got there and he was laying on the couch and when I walked in he like held his arms out like he wanted a hug and he was like ‘tsumu i’m so dizzy’ in like the cutest and softest voice

**Sugawara:** Hands off atsumu that’s my boyfriend 

**Atsumu:** UM NO SIR HE IS NOT

**Atsumu:** Anyways I sat down next to him and now he’s sleeping on me

**Atsumu:** And I don’t want to wake him uppp

**Sugawara:** Would you like a drink while you wait Atsumu ?

**Atsumu:** … that’s tempting but i have to be okay to drive home

**Sugawara:** Spend the night! Daichi and I have a spare room for a reason!

**Atsumu:** Hmm

**Atsumu:** Okay

**Atsumu:** Samu I’m not coming home tonight so don’t freak out i guess

**Osamu:** I’d never freak out

**Osamu:** That’s so out of character of me to be worried about u… gross

**Osamu:** I’m gagging even thinking about it

**Atsumu:** I hate you

**Atsumu:** Piece of shit

**Osamu:** ξ＼(ﾟｰﾟ*)(*ﾟ▽ﾟ)ﾉ⌒ξﾟДﾟ)ﾉﾉ

**Atsumu:** ξ＼(゜ー゜*)(*゜▽゜)ノ⌒ξ゜Д゜)ノノ

**Daichi:** Stop it wtf

**Kuroo:** SUGAWARA WAIT WTF I’M SO JEALOUS

**Kuroo:** I WANT TO GET DRUNK WITH YOU AND SPEND THE NIGHT

**Sugawara:** Lol

**Sugawara:** You can come over!

**Kuroo:** It’s 7pm…

**Kuroo:** And I’m in Tokyo...

**Sugawara:** Well…

**Daichi:** The offer still stands...

**Kuroo:** Kenma…

**Kenma:** … Can we bring Shouyou

**Kenma:** He’s here

**Kuroo:** WAIT WHAT

**Kuroo:** I DIDN’T KNOW HE WAS HERE??

**Kenma:** Um yeah

**Kenma:** You’ve been at work all day with your phone off, idiot

**Kenma:** And he came here as a surprise

**Kuroo:** WTF

**Kenma:** YOU DIDN’T TALK TO ME AT ALL TODAY, IT’S WHAT YOU DESERVE

**Kuroo:** aww did u miss me ☆=(ゝω･)/

**Hinata:** No because I was here to cuddle him instead (★≧▽^))★☆

**Hinata:** Also, if we go all the way there, can Kageyama come?

**Hinata:** I get too clingy when I’m drunk and I always miss him so much

**Daichi:** Lol of course

**Kageyama:** Lol omg Shou

**Kageyama:** I can come by now and just help Daichi

**Kageyama:** Because I know for a fact that he’s going to be the only sober one tonight

**Daichi:** Yes please omg

**Sugawara:** Kageyama don’t be boring!! Drink with us

**Kageyama:** Lol suga you already know that I don’t really like getting drunk

**Hinata:** Tobio has a weak stomach when it comes to alcohol and he’ll puke sooo fast

**Kageyama:** At least I’m not a lightweight

**Hinata:** SHUT UP

**Daichi:** If any of you want to drop by you can!

**Oikawa:** Sorry, Iwa-chan and I are busy! (人´∀｀)．☆．。．:*･°

**Iwaizumi:** Lol maybe next time

**Akaashi:** Ahhhh

**Akaashi:** Bokuto and I can’t make it since it’s last minute, but maybe in a few weekends we can all hang out at my apartment!

**Bokuto:** YESS AKAASHI

**Sugawara:** Awe! Cute okay! Do you guys have any plans tonight?

**Bokuto:** I’m taking him out to dinner!

**Sugawara:** Cute!!!

**Sugawara:** Anyways!! I’ll keep the door unlocked!!

**Nishinoya:** SUGAWARA ASAHI IS ASLEEP BUT I’M WAKING HIM UP AND THEN WE’LL BE RUNNING

**Sugawara:** GOOD

**Yamaguchi:** Lolll I would stop by but Tsukki is sick so I’m omw to his apartment to take care of him for the night😿👨‍⚕️

**Sugawara:** Nurse Yamaguchi!!! Cute!!!

**Sugawara:** Should I lend you my nurse costume???

**Oikawa:** your what? 😳

**Sugawara: 🤭** 😋

**Daichi:** Koushi please shut up

**Kuroo:** 😳

**Daichi:** Anyways, Yamaguchi, tell Tsukishima that we hope he feels better! 

**Yamaguchi:** I will!

**Tanaka:** KIYOKO SAID SHE WANTS TO GO SO WE’RE COMING TOO

**Sugawara:** YESSS!!!!!!

**Sugawara:** Also Kuroo if you puke here again I’ll kill you!

**Kuroo:** 👁💧⏝💧👁 

  
  
  
  



	134. This but I'm tired but I'm not but I am but I'm not ALSO I CANT STOP THINKING OF MAKOHARU GET THEM OUT BUT DONT BUT DO BUT DONT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: Maybe I’m the single one?
> 
> Akaashi: Character development

**_💔_ **

**Hinata:** I’m single now

**Oikawa:** ?????!!

**Kenma:** I’m apart of a throuple

**Hinata:** KENMA BE HEARTBROKEN WITH ME

**Kenma:** I can’t, I’m in a throuple.

**Akaashi:** Is everything alright?

**Hinata:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** 😥

**Kenma:** They’re so cute

**Hinata:** I know! It’s terrible

**Hinata:** AND YOU’RE CUDDLING WITH THEM NOW????

**Kenma:** Kuro should be hugging me??? But he’s hugging Kageyama instead

**Kenma:** So I forced my way into their little moment

**Hinata:** My best friend and his boyfriend STOLE MY BOYFRIEND

**Oikawa:** Aw so sad 

**Oikawa:** Find another boyfriend

**Hinata:** 😀no😀

**Oikawa:** Sounds toxic

**Hinata:** What if he’s in love with Kuroo now?! What happened while I was drunk??? How did they get to the point of them cuddling on the floor????? WHAT'S HAPPENING

**Kenma:** Daichi was getting everyone situated to sleep and Kageyama was getting pillows and stuff

**Kenma:** Kuro likes to cuddle while he sleeps and Kageyama was probably the nearest person to him

**Hinata:** BUT KAGEYAMA LOOKS SO COMFY

**Kenma:** Maybe they are in love

**Hinata:** NO

**Kenma:** Well Kuroo is about to wake up oops

**Hinata:** How can you tell?

**Kenma:** He always squeezes his arms a little tighter before he wakes up and he makes this little hum noise

**Hinata:** …

**Oikawa:** … 

**Oikawa:** Is that cute?

**Oikawa:** Okay I’ve thought about it! That’s so cute kenma wtf you just know that

**Kenma:** Well I’m a little embarrassed lol

-

**Kenma:** Maybe I’m the single one?

**Akaashi:** Character development

**Kenma:** Kageyama woke up and was kind of confused on where he was. And Kuro thought it would be funny if he just kept his arms around him.

**Kenma:** And like Kageyama sat up a little and was looking for Shouyou so I told him he was in the bathroom and then he jumped a bit. I think he was surprised that I was so close to him.

**Kenma:** His hair was so messy and Kuro just squeezed us together so tight and like, I’m in the middle and he can’t stop crying over how cute Kageyama is

**Kenma:** And then Sho came out of the bathroom and Kageyama tried to go to him but Kuro wouldn’t let him so him and Sho had a little game of tug going on until Kageyama was finally released

**Kenma:** And now Kuro is just sobbing

**Kuroo:** I feel betrayed! MY KENMA DIDN’ T EVEN HELP ME KEEP KAGEYAMA

**Kuroo:** You didn’t fight for him!!

**Kenma:** I couldn’t move my arms

**Hinata:** Good! KAGEYAMA LOOKS SO CUTE WHEN HE WAKES UP AHHH

**Kuroo:** HE DOES AHHH

**Kageyama:** No please

**Hinata:** SO CUTE HE’S SO CUTE

**Kageyama** _ left the group _

**Kuroo:** When he thinks leaving the group chat will save him even though we’re in the same room as him

**Hinata:** He’s stuck with us

**Kenma:** Ew why am I actually feeling lonely

**Kuroo:** NO KENMA I DON’T MEAN IT I SWEAR

**Kenma:** I know lol 💗

**Kenma:** Anyways

**Kenma** added  **Kageyama** to the group

**Kuroo:** KENMA I'M SORRY I ONLY HAVE EYES FOR YOU

**Hinata:** Let's keep it that way teehee

**Kageyama:** I hate it here. I’m gonna make breakfast for everyone

**Kenma:** i want to help

**Kenma:** Get me away from these freaks

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Kuroo:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** Kageyama loving freaks

**Kageyama:** :-(

**Hinata:** SHUT UP OIKAWA

**Kuroo:** SHUT UP OIKAWA

**Kenma:** SHUT UP OIKAWA

**-**

**Bokuto** changed the group name to  _ EVERYONE PLEASE _

**Akaashi:** bokuto lmao

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI

**Sugawara:** is everything okay??

**Bokuto:** SUGA! YAY OKAYYY

**Bokuto:** EVERYONE PLEASE

**Bokuto:** tell Kenma yes!!

**Kenma:** Bokuto…

**Akaashi:** lmaooo

**Kenma: 😾**

**Bokuto:** YOU’LL LOOK SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** ooh what’s happening

**Bokuto:** I want Kenma to style his hair like mine! 

**Sugawara:** Oh my

**Bokuto:** CUTE RIGHT

**Sugawara:** Oh my

**Kenma:** Exactly

**Kenma:** Bokuto, I’ll look terrible

**Bokuto:** KENMA IT’S NOT THAT BAD

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI DID IT ONCE

**Kenma:** I have a lot more hair than he does

**Kenma:** And you too Bokuto

**Akaashi:** I forgot I did that lmao

**Kenma:** How did you look??

**Akaashi:** Terrible

**Akaashi:** But Bokuto had fun

**Bokuto:** KENMA PLEASE I’LL LOVE YOU FOREVER

**Akaashi:** Oh, I don’t think he wants that

**Kenma:** Why would you even offer that. That sounds horrible

**Bokuto:** :-(

**Bokuto:** :-( I’m sorry

**Akaashi:** Kenma...

**Kenma:** Ah no it’s fine

**Kenma:** I just don’t think it would work out Bokuto

**Kenma:** My hair is long so like, I’d use all your product and it would look completely different 

**Bokuto:** I guess

**Kenma:** Yeah and plus I don’t think I could pull off such a

**Kenma:** Such a

**Kenma:** Um

**Akaashi:** Kenma

**Kenma:** I don’t think I could pull of such a cool hairstyle haha

**Bokuto:** COOL YOU THINK ITS COOL

**Kenma:** Of course

**Bokuto:** YOU’RE RIGHT IT’S ALMOST TOO COOL

**Akaashi:** Lmao that’s right

**Bokuto:** But Akaashi!! You looked good with it, you should do it again

**Akaashi:** I think my hairstyle right now is fine

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI ALWAYS LOOKS PERFECT SO THAT'S TRUE

**Bokuto:** WAIT AHH KUROO IS FACETIMING MEEEE

**Kenma:** Why don’t you guys just come over??? Wut

**Akaashi:** Lmao Bokuto wanted to but he had a lot of homework earlier and then he got tired

**Akaashi:** Also thank you Kenma!

**Kenma:** lol i almost fucked it 😼 but then I remembered all of the Bokuto lessons you and Kuro gave me

**Kenma:** Also, Suga, thank you for not agreeing with him

**Sugawara:** Not gonna lie, that sounds terrifying

**Kenma:** One time him and Kuro swapped hairstyles and I-

**Akaashi:** Why would you remind me

**Akaashi:** I saw so much of Kuroo’s forehead

**Kenma:** His cute forehead😻

**Akaashi:** Sure

**Kenma:** WHAT

**-**

**Atsumu:** _ Attached image _

**Atsumu:** I found this pic of me and Kita in high school

**Osamu:** omg twinnnn

**Osamu:** You look good

**Atsumu:** When the ugly bitch calls you twin

**Kita:** I-

**Suna:** Don’t call my boyfriend ugly

**Atsumu:** It’s only the truth

**Kita:** If you insult Osamu… You’re technically insulting yourself

**Atsumu:** So you think I’m ugly????

**Kita:** Of course not!!

**Suna:** So you think Osamu is hot?

**Kita:** OF COURSE NOT

**Suna:** Good because I think your boyfriend isn't hot either

**Kita:** Did you want me to say Osamu is hot? I’m confused

**Suna:** No. I just wanted to make sure we were on the same page

**Nishinoya:** I have something to say that is far more important

**Kiyoko:** omg

**Osamu:** speak your truth

**Nishinoya:** Kiyoko, I love you but you can’t do this

**Tanaka:** omg

**Asahi:** Omg

**Osamu:** Fill me in, what’s happening rn

**Nishinoya:** So Tanaka, my bro, my rock, my bestie, my BFF, the straw to my berry

**Nishinoya:** He, Ryuunosuke, just informed me, Yuu, that he is matching with his girlfriend, Kiyoko, this Halloween

**Osamu:** Tea

**Daichi:** Noya…

**Nishinoya:** WAIT DAICHI LET ME FINISH

**Nishinoya:** Tanaka and I ALWAYS match on Halloween.

**Tanaka:** We’re going to a halloween party noya, it’s not even actually Halloween

**Kiyoko:** If it bothers you, I can just match with Asahi

**Nishinoya:** YOU CANT MATCH WITH MY BOYFRIEND

**Kiyoko:** Then you can’t match with mine

**Nishinoya:** That’s not fair

**Kiyoko:** ….

**Tanaka:** Broski, Noya, BFF, Peanut butter to my jelly, my rock, the reason I’m alive

**Tanaka:** I thought you were matching with Asahi this Halloween

**Nishinoya:** Wut

**Tanaka:** You showed me the options you guys were looking through because you were excited

**Nishinoya:** WAIT I REMEMBER

**Tanaka:** Yes…

**Tanaka:** Asahi, why didn't you remind him

**Asahi:** Idk, I was weirdly embarrassed to

**Nishinoya:** NO ASAHI I’M SORRY I FORGOT I’LL NEVER FORGET AGAIN

**Nishinoya:** ALSO WTF TELL ME NEXT TIME AND DON’T BE EMBARRASSED, I’M YOUR BOYFRIEND

**Asahi:** I know haha sorry

**Nishinoya:** DON'T APOLOGIZE TO ME

**Kiyoko:** Glad this all worked out because I would have matched with Ryuunosuke anyways and it would have been awkward for him probably

**Tanaka:** Oh god WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT I'M THINKING ABOUT THAT NOW

**Nishinoya:** AND ASAHI WOULD HAVE JUST BEEN LEFT OUT NOOO ASAHI IM SORRY

**Asahi:** It didn’t even happen lol

**Nishinoya:** BUT IT COULD HAVE

**Asahi:** But it didn’t so it’s fine lol

**Nishinoya:** I guess..

**Daichi:** I’m so confused.

**Daichi:** Noya wtf

**Daichi:** Also, no arguing in group chats at 4am

**Nishinoya:** Sorry Daichi!!

**Kiyoko:** Goodnight Daichi 😊

**Daichi:** Goodnight everyone

**Daichi:** Osamu, Atsumu, Kita, Suna

**Daichi:** That includes you

**Osamu:** THAT WASN’T MY FAULT

**Atsumu:** It literally was

**Osamu:** WHAT

**Atsumu:** You INSULTED ME

**Osamu:** I CALLED YOU TWIN

**Atsumu:** AN INSULT COMING FROM YOU

**Daichi:** NO ARGUING IN THE GROUPCHAT AT 4AM

**Atsumu:** Sorry!

**Osamu:** Sorry!!

**-**

**Kunimi:** If you woke up in your significant other's body, what would you do? Personally, I would shower me with attention and love

**Kindaichi:** Do I not do that???

**Kunimi:** You do. But not at this very moment

**Kindaichi:** Baby, I’m sorry! I’ll come over right now

**Kunimi:** Ew Kindaichi, stop making me ugly in the chat

**Oikawa:** What

**Kindaichi:** What

**Kunimi:** Anyways

**Oikawa:** I think I would HOLD MY HAND WHEN WE GO OUT

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru you know I hate that

**Oikawa:** You know that I don’t care

**Sugawara:** I’m gonna stop you🛑✋🏻🚨👉🏻 right there👊🏻😤

**Sugawara:** Where is the consent Oikawa!!! 

**Oikawa:** I want to hold Iwa-chan’s hand!!! He just doesn’t let me because his hands get sweaty

**Oikawa:** I don’t mind it AND I TOLD YOU THAT

**Sugawara:** Iwaizumi!!! Normalize 😤Hand ✋🏻sweat💧

**Sugawara:** It makes sense that your hand gets sweaty because body heat

**Sugawara:** Your boyfriend is TOUCH STARVED

**Iwaizumi:** Both of you are too much wtf

**Iwaizumi:** I don’t want to gross him out

**Oikawa:** I won’t be grossed out!! We can just take breaks when your hand starts to sweat!! I’m sure mine will start too!!!!!!!! HOLD MY HAND PLEASE

**Iwaizumi:** Lmaooo okay fine

**Oikawa:** Periodt!!!

**Sugawara:** Glad that’s solved

**Daichi:** If I woke up in Suga’s body I would just go back to sleep

**Daichi:** He needs more sleep

**Sugawara:** Aw Daichi

**Sugawara:** Well I was gonna say I’d finger myself if I woke up in your body but since your answer was so sweet I’ll change mine!!

**Sugawara:** I would go back to bed with you!

**Daichi:** Is it really changing your answer if you said both anyways

**Sugawara:** Yes

**Kunimi:** I regret asking this question KINDAICHI HURRY UP

**Kindaichi:** I’m LIKE THREE SECONDS AWAY

**Kunimi:** Don’t yell at me

**Kunimi:** THIS IS THE LONGEST THREE SECONDS OF MY LIFE

**Kindaichi:** omg


	135. This whole episode is just me projecting but um whatever whatever i think i'm just gonna draw atsukita and listen to screw loose for like the millionth time tonight because the note change itches my brain idk dude anyways periodt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: WHAT
> 
> Sugawara: HUH
> 
> Kenma: Yes, ex, because mentally I’ve already broken up with you so I can leave you for Akaashi
> 
> Akaashi: Yes baby boy 😻

_ EVERYONE PLEASE _

**Kuroo:** Um

**Kuroo:** Um

**Kuroo:** Um

**Kuroo:** Kenma

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Kuroo:** KOZUME KENMA

**Oikawa:** Or maybe you could just call him instead of blowing up the chat

**Kuroo:** NO NO HE’S SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO ME

**Oikawa:** … 

**Oikawa:** SO WHY ARE YOU BLOWING UP THE CHAT

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Kuroo:** OMG

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Kuroo:** TONGUE PIERCING

**Kuroo:** HE???

**Kuroo:** WHEN???

**Kenma:** Bokuto took me! Lol

**Bokuto:** YEAH I GOT MY EARS PIERCED 

**Bokuto:** Akaashi said I look handsome!

**Akaashi:** You do!

**Bokuto:** !!!

**Kuroo:** UM HELLO

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Kuroo:** KENMA HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL ME ABOUT THIS

**Kenma:** I knew you’d be a freak like you’re being right now

**Oikawa:** OMG KENMA YOU AND IWA-CHAN MATCH

**Iwaizumi:** It looks so good!!

**Iwaizumi:** Your life is going to suck for a few days lol

**Kenma:** Yeah I know 

**Kenma:** I already got a noodle wrapped around the bar when I was eating (☍﹏⁰)

**Kenma:** It hurt

**Iwaizumi:** Yeah that’s kind of hard to get used to

**Kenma:** But also Tetsu is freaking out so that’s kind of funny

**Iwaizumi:** Yeah Oikawa was reacting the same way

**Kenma:** It’s nice

**Kenma:** I’m getting so much attention (｀ω´)

**Kenma:** But also he keeps trying to SHOVE HIS TONGUE INTO MY MOUTH

**Kuroo:** I’M SORRY I JUST WANT TO KISS YOU

**Kenma:** YOU CAN KISS ME WITHOUT DOING THAT

**Sugawara:** No he can’t 😠

**Iwaizumi:** OIKAWA DID THAT TOO WTF

**Kenma:** IT HURTS 

**Kenma:** AND IT MAKES ME JUMP EVERY TIME HE DOES IT

**Kenma:** AND THEN HE PULLS BACK AND HE’S LIKE 

**Kenma:** (´∵｀) i’m so sorry kitten did i hurt you? (´∵｀)

**Kenma:** YES IDIOT THAT’S WHAT I KEEP TELLING YOU

**Kuroo:** I’M SORRY 

**Oikawa:** DOES HE HAVE A LISP

**Kuroo:** YES

**Oikawa:** Awww

**Oikawa:** I miss Iwa-chan’s tongue piercing lisp

**Iwaizumi:** You literally made fun of me everyday until it went away

**Oikawa:** THAT DOESN’T MEAN I CAN’T MISS IT

**Sugawara:** KENMA SAY SOMETHING AND SEND IT TO THE GROUP I WANT TO HEAR

**Kuroo:** Omg say pussy

**Kenma:** Pussy

**Kenma:** That’s what you thought of

**Kenma:** That’s what you want me to say

**Kenma:** Out of everything

**Kenma:** My ex boyfriend is a freak check 🥰💅🏼

**Kuroo:** EX???

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Sugawara:** HUH

**Kenma:** Yes, ex, because mentally I’ve already broken up with you so I can leave you for Akaashi

**Akaashi:** Yes baby boy 😻

**Akaashi:** I won’t tongue kiss your new piercing 

**Akaashi:** Come over bbg, I’ll treat you right

**Kenma:** 🏃🏻‍♂️💨

**Kuroo:** NOOOO

**Kuroo:** KENMAAA

**Kuroo:** kenma i’m thorry

**Kuroo:** come kith me pleathe

**Kenma:** DON’T TYPE WITH A LISP WTF

**Kenma:** I WANT TO LEAVE YOU

**Oikawa:** AHAHAHA OMG IWA-CHAN

**Iwaizumi:** Omg lol

-

**Sugawara:** KAGEYAMA AND HINATA WHERE ARE YOU

**Oikawa:** What

**Sugawara:** I’M AT THEIR APARTMENT 

**Sugawara:** AND NEITHER OF THEM ARE ANSWERING THEIR PHONES

**Oikawa:** Why are you at their apartment?

**Sugawara:** I was just going to drop off some cupcakes I baked!!

**Sugawara:** But I guess they want me to die! ㄖꏁㄖ

**Yamaguchi:** Um

**Yamaguchi:** Hinata is at Yachi’s and Kageyama is at Tsukki’s!

**Yamaguchi:** They’ve uh

**Yamaguchi:** Had a fight

**Oikawa:** Oh god what did you do Tobio

**Kageyama:** Why is it my fault?!

**Oikawa:** Because you’re shitty

**Kageyama:** Whatever

**Oikawa:** DON’T WHATEVER ME

**Oikawa:** WHERE’S MY SHOUYOU

**Oikawa:** WHAT DID THIS HORRIBLE BOY DO TO YOU?!

**Daichi:** Oikawa, Kageyama isn’t horrible, he might not even be at fault

**Hinata:** He is!

**Kageyama:** No I’m not, dumbass

**Hinata:** Yes you are wtf

**Kageyama:** Dumbass. I’m done talking about this

**Sugawara:** Stop the violence 🕺

**Kuroo:** Hey hey hey what is this? 😩 what happened to this is supposed to be a family?!

**Atsumu:** Oh please she has a family she’s a muh-ther

**Akaashi:** Walk away 🤬

**Oikawa:** WHAT IS THIS

**Oikawa:** STOP

**Sugawara:** the violence 🕺

**Oikawa:** NO

**Oikawa:** THIS IS NO TIME FOR JOKES

**Oikawa:** SHOUYOU WHAT HAPPENED

**Daichi:** Omg

**Hinata:** KAGEYAMA IS A JERK THAT’S WHAT HAPPENED

**Hinata:** He told me he would take me to the movies this weekend!

**Hinata:** And it’s the weekend, so I asked if we were going

**Hinata:** And he told me that we’re staying in because he has to clean!

**Hinata:** THE APARTMENT WASN’T EVEN DIRTY STUPID KAGEYAMA

**Kageyama:** DUMBASS I CLEAN EVERY SATURDAY NIGHT

**Kageyama:** I DON’T KNOW WHY YOU’RE SURPRISED

**Kageyama:** AND I NEVER TOLD YOU WE WERE GOING OUT

**Hinata:** YES YOU DID

**Osamu:** Stop the violence 🕺

**Sugawara:** Hey hey hey what is this? 😩 what happened to this is supposed to be a family?!

**Daichi:** Omg don’t start that again

**Osamu:** We can start over

**Akaashi:** You did this to me! You told coach sylvester about my summer surgery 🤬🤯

**Osamu:** You have a surgery when you get your appendix out! YOU

**Osamu:** GOT 

**Osamu:** A

**Osamu:** BOOB

**Osamu:** JOB!

**Akaashi:** Yup! Sure did! 🤬👊

**Iwaizumi:** STOP HAHA

**Osamu:** No

**Osamu:** This argument is stupid

**Atsumu:** Yeah

**Atsumu:** Kageyama just take him to the movies lol

**Osamu:** I was gonna tell Hinata to just get over it

**Atsumu:** I see…

**Osamu:** 🤢 get out of my apartment, I don’t want to live with a Hinata apologist 

**Atsumu:** I could say the same about you… 🤢

**Kita:** Stop it Atsumu

**Suna:** Stop it Osamu

**Sugawara:** Uhhh

**Sugawara:** Guys is that really something to fight about?

**Hinata:** Yes

**Hinata:** He’s not following through on his promises!

**Kageyama:** He’s being whiny and making things up! I never agreed to do that! Because I would have told him that we can go to the movies on FRIDAY or SUNDAY

**Sugawara:** Wow this feels just like the good ‘ol days 🥰

**Oikawa:** Tobio apologize!

**Kenma:** Shouyou admit you’re being dramatic..

**Hinata:** KENMA

**Hinata:** At least Oikawa gets me

**Kenma:** Yeah because he’s a whiny brat too

**Kenma:** Shouyou, when did he say that he’d take you to the movies?

**Hinata:** The other night!

**Iwaizumi:** Were you guys in bed when he said it?

**Hinata:** Yes

**Iwaizumi:** Was he falling asleep?

**Hinata:** Yes why

**Iwaizumi:** He probably doesn’t remember saying it if he was half asleep

**Hinata:** Hmm

**Sugawara:** I do stuff like that all the time when I’m half asleep!

**Sugawara:** I always tell Daichi that I’m going to take him flower picking or that I’m going to take him out for coffee before class

**Sugawara:** And I never remember doing that

**Sugawara:** And if Daichi remembers and holds me to it, he asks me calmly about it, and we talk it out

**Sugawara:** c a l m l y 

**Sugawara:** Like adults

**Sugawara:** Because at that point it’s a misunderstanding on my part

**Sugawara:** So yes, it’s a misunderstanding on Kageyama’s part

**Sugawara:** But you didn’t need to react the way that you did, Hinata. 

**Daichi:** Aww baby

**Daichi:** You’re being so blunt with them 

**Sugawara:** Of course!!

**Sugawara:** I love you guys, but this is a really stupid reason to be so angry at each other

**Sugawara:** Do you want to break up?

**Kageyama:** No

**Hinata:** NO

**Sugawara:** Then why are you letting such a small miscommunication do this?

**Kageyama:** …

**Kageyama:** You’re right

**Kageyama:** Shouyou, I’m leaving Tsukishima’s. Can I come pick you up?

**Hinata:** Yeah

**Kuroo:** Sugawara omg

**Kuroo:** You’re magic （￣ε￣ʃƪ）

**Sugawara:** No, you are (ΘεΘʃƪ)

**Kuroo:** Oh, you （￣ε￣ʃƪ）

**Sugawara:** Oh, you (ΘεΘʃƪ)）

**Osamu:** You can’t hit me! 🤬

**Akaashi:** Well sure I can, unless you went and got yourself knocked up again! 🤬🕺

**Daichi:** STOP WTF

\--

**Yamaguchi:** I have so much homework due tonight!!

**Yamaguchi:** And I just cannot!! Seem to focus!! On any of it!!

**Sugawara:** Oh no

**Sugawara:** How much have you gotten done?

**Yamaguchi:** None of it!

**Yamaguchi:** BUT

**Yamaguchi:** I bought a skateboard and I’ve been practicing that instead so that’s cool right?!?!?!

**Tsukishima:** Yeah, skateboarding is a wonderful skill to fall back on when you fail out of school because you literally never do your assignments.

**Atsumu:** OUTTA POCKET

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI

**Yamaguchi:** Whatever

**Yamaguchi:** I think I look COOL

**Yamaguchi:** Except I keep falling because I don’t know how to balance 

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki? 🥺

**Tsukishima:** Yes Tadashi?

**Yamaguchi:** 🥺

**Tsukishima:** Fine

**Tsukishima:** I’ll help

**Tsukishima:** It’s not too hard to balance, and you’re a quick learner, so don’t get so discouraged

**Yamaguchi:** How did you know I was getting discouraged???!!?!? (☆ω☆*）

**Tsukishima:** Because I know you Tadashi lol

**Tsukishima:** I’ll come over in like an hour

**Yamaguchi:** i WISH you would come over now (ｏ´_｀ｏ)

**Tsukishima:** Well I’m working on homework

**Tsukishima:** Like you should be

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI UGH

**Kuroo:** WAIT WAIT WAIT

**Bokuto:** TSUKKI YOU KNOW HOW TO SKATE?!?!

**Tsukishima:** Yes

**Tsukishima:** My brother taught me

**Yamaguchi:** 🤤

**Tsukishima:** Don’t 🤤 my brother

**Yamaguchi:** NO I’M 🤤 YOU 

**Kuroo:** AHAHA WTF

**Kuroo:** ANYWAYS OMG

**Kuroo:** And I always thought you were just a boring square who happened to be good at volleyball 😼

**Tsukishima:** Kuroo please don’t talk to me in the groupchat anymore

**Bokuto:** AHAHAHA

\--

**Oikawa:** 💃🕺💃🕺

**Oikawa:** 💃🕺👯‍♀️💃🕺👯‍♂️

**Sugawara:** 👯‍♀️💃🕺

**Oikawa:** 🕺👯‍♀️💃🕺👯‍♂️

**Sugawara:** Why are we dancing? 🕺🕺

**Oikawa:** OMG SO

**Oikawa:** ONE OF MY COLLEGE ROOMMATES

**Oikawa:** Not the horrible one

**Oikawa:** JUST HAD A DOG THAT HAD PUPPIES

**Oikawa:** AND IWA-CHAN AND I WERE TALKING TO HER THE OTHER DAY AND SHE WAS LIKE

**Oikawa:** ‘do u want any puppies’ KIND OF AS A JOKE

**Oikawa:** AND IWA-CHAN SAID YES

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN IWA-CHAN

**Oikawa:** SO WE’RE GETTING A PUPPY

**Oikawa:** And we tried to give her money but she said no 🕺 so we r getting a free puppy 💃

**Oikawa:** Which is why I’m dancing 🕺👯‍♀️💃🕺👯‍♂️

**Sugawara:** OMFG WHAT

**Sugawara:** NO WAY

**Sugawara:** SEND A PIC

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN WANTS THIS ONE

**Sugawara:** CUTE OMG

**Sugawara:** Have you guys started thinking about names?

**Oikawa:** Yes!! Iwa-chan has a list lol

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan is such a cutie 🥺

**Sugawara:** AHHH OMFG

**Sugawara:** WHEN YOU DECIDE ON A NAME I HAVE TO BE THE FIRST TO KNOW!!!

**Oikawa:** OKAY!!!

**Sugawara:** 💃🕺👯‍♀️💃🕺👯‍♂️💃🕺👯‍♀️💃🕺👯‍♂️

**Oikawa:** 💃🕺👯‍♀️💃🕺👯‍♂️💃🕺👯‍♀️💃🕺👯‍♂️💃🕺👯‍♀️💃🕺👯‍♂️

**Kuroo:** Okay so Oikawa that’s nice and all

**Kuroo:** Like that’s really awesome

**Kuroo:** But it’s 5am

**Kuroo:** So PLEASE STOP TALKING IN THE CHAT

**Kuroo:** You woke Kenma up 😠

**Oikawa:** OOPS OOPS


	136. This exists now for some reason. Also I'm just thinking about Hanako and Kabakura like they live in my brainnnnn and I love them so much literally wtf wtf wtf Like the creator of Wotakoi had a list of my faves qualifications when making those two wtf wtf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: 🤤🤤
> 
> Kuroo: oop Kenma, your abs fetish is showing
> 
> Kenma: ITS NOT A FETISH I JUST KNOW A GOOD BODY WHEN I SEE ONE

_ EVERYONE PLEASE _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** I’m gonna give this pheromone perfume a 10/10 she works wonders

**Daichi:** Koushi

**Sugawara:** 😋

**Oikawa:** So it does work?

**Sugawara:** Yes

**Daichi:** No

**Kenma: 😌** Omegaverse✨

**Akaashi:** I never knew those existed what

**Daichi:** They shouldn’t

**Sugawara:** HAHAH DAICHI

**Akaashi:** So does it work or not?

**Daichi:** I’M EXPLAINING BEFORE SUGA CAN

**Sugawara:** lame

**Daichi:** I don’t think it works

**Daichi:** Suga like, wore it one night when we fucked and I noticed he smelled different so I asked what it was

**Daichi:** and like since then he has been using it whenever we like do our thing

**Daichi:** So now I just associate the smell with sex

**Daichi:** But now Suga wears it out CASUALLY

**Daichi:** Like we went out for lunch earlier and he was using it

**Daichi:** The day before, we went grocery shopping and I could smell it on him

**Sugawara:** Lmao I think it’s funny

**Sugawara:** and it makes you excited

**Daichi:** Koushi stop

**Oikawa:** This is kinda embarrassing to read

**Sugawara:** lmaoo nooooo

**Sugawara:** Daichi, that means it works. If you smell it on me and get horny, it’s doing its job

**Daichi:** I guess… But I still think it’s kinda weird. Do we really need something like that?

**Sugawara:** Us personally? Of course not! I just think it’s kinda funny

**Iwaizumi:** Suga you’re insane lmao

**Iwaizumi:** What made you buy that anyway?

**Sugawara:** Me and Tooru were at one of those adult stores

**Sugawara:** Well, obviously, where else could I have gotten this?? Lmao

**Sugawara:** I saw it and it made me laugh but then it actually smelled really nice so I bought it and decided to see if it actually worked lol

**Iwaizumi:** Why were you guys even there wtf

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan, I just wanted to take a gander

**Iwaizumi:** You could have went online

**Oikawa:** I know! Suga had suggested that but I thought it would be fun ◉‿◉

**Iwaizumi:** You’re both terrifying

**Iwaizumi:** Omg wait, did you buy something weird too?

**Iwaizumi:** Wait, don’t answer that in the group chat

**Oikawa:** (◡‿◡✿)

**Akaashi:** I’m so curious omg

**Akaashi:** Kenma, are you busy rn?

**Kenma:** Nope!

**Akaashi:** Would you like to accompany me to a scary store?

**Kenma:** I’d love to

**Hinata:** I wanna go!

**Kageyama:** What why

**Hinata:** Yamaguchi, do you???

**Yamaguchi:** Sure!

**Tsukishima:** What is happening right now??

**Iwaizumi:** Omg Suga and Oikawa, look what you guys did

**Oikawa:** Surely Hinata isn’t going for the perfume. Kageyama loves the way he smells already

**Kageyama:** SHUT UP ABOUT THAT

**Oikawa:** I CANT AHHAHA

**Daichi** and  **Sugawara**

  
  


**Daichi:** Suga…

**Sugawara:** Daichi… 

**Sugawara: 💘** Lol what’s up?

**Daichi:** Are you sure you didn't buy the perfume because we needed it?

**Sugawara:** ???? No. Of course not Daichi!

**Daichi:** I just want to make sure because like

**Daichi:** I want you to feel comfortable enough to tell me when you want to do things or like when you want to try something new

**Sugawara:** I am comfortable with my Daichi!!

**Sugawara:** I honestly just bought it for fun!

**Sugawara:** Wait omg

**Sugawara:** Omg the pheromone perfume made you self conscious

**Daichi:** Only a little haha

**Daichi:** I thought maybe you were like idk

**Daichi:** Unsatisfied or something

**Sugawara:** Unsatisfied?!?!!!??? You must be crazy. Daichi, you of all people should know I’m far from unsatisfied!

**Sugawara:** and Oikawa

**Daichi:** I was worried!

**Daichi:** WAIT OIKAWA? WHAT DO YOU TELL HIM??

**Sugawara:** wut

**Sugawara:** Have I never told you??

**Daichi:** ???!?!!!

**Sugawara:** Me and Oikawa talk about things like this 😋 Do you not do that with your friends?

**Daichi:** Suga, Imagine me talking to Asahi about that

**Sugawara:** You should try! And then tell me everything because I’m actually so curious😋😋

**Daichi:** You want me to interrogate our best friend about his sex life?

**Sugawara:** Yes!

**Daichi:** Okay, I can try

**Sugawara:** AHHAHA PERIODT DAICHI

**Sugawara:** But seriously, you don’t even talk to Kuroo or Iwaizumi about this stuff??? Kageyama???

**Daichi:** Why would you say Kageyama wtf

**Sugawara:** I don’t know I regretted it the moment I typed it

**Daichi:** Lmaoooo good. But no, I don’t

**Sugawara:** Well can you start??? It’d make me feel really good about myself

**Daichi:** Okay lmaoo I’ll try

**Sugawara:** oh Daichi! You can just tell the groupchat!!!🥰💐

**Daichi:** Cute emojis but the groupchat knows too much

**Sugawara:** 😔😔 exactly, what’s a little more gonna do? 😔

**Daichi:** Stop that lol, one person should be enough

**Sugawara:** I guess😞😞

**Daichi:** Omg stopppp

**Daichi:** I didn’t know this was important to you

**Sugawara:** ARE YOU INSANE? OF COURSE THIS IS IMPORTANT TO ME. I BRAG TO OIKAWA ALL THE TIME ABOUT YOU AND AND THE THINGS WE DO AND THIS WHOLE TIME YOU’VE JUST🔇🤐

**Daichi:** Well now I feel bad lmao

**Sugawara:** WAIT DAICHI WE GOT SO OFF TOPIC OMG

**Sugawara:** ANYWAYS BACK TO THE WHOLE PERFUME THING

**Sugawara:** I’m sorry I made you feel like that :-( I didn’t mean to

**Daichi:** It’s okay lol, as long as it was just for fun

**Daichi:** Okay well, I’m embarrassed now lmaooo

**Sugawara: 😠** Don’t be!!! 

**Daichi:** I gotta head back to work

**Daichi:** I’ll see you when I get home!

**Sugawara:** I miss you! I’ll make us dinner

**Daichi:** I won’t be home until pretty late so you can eat without me

**Sugawara:** 🙃no🥰

**Daichi:** Fine lmaooo

**Sugawara:** I love you💘💘

**Daichi:** Love you more ❤️

**-**

**Oikawa:** Guys today is the day I’ve been waiting for all year

**Iwaizumi:** Omg

**Kageyama:** What’s happening?

**Oikawa:** Tobio, I can always count on you to care about me (๑♡⌓♡๑)

**Oikawa:** So to keep things secretive I won’t name names. But someone from Kitagawa Daiichi didn’t wish me a happy birthday this year. You, Iwa-chan, Kunimi and Kindaichi all said it

**Oikawa:** Today is his birthday, and I’m not wishing him a happy one.

**Iwaizumi:** lmao

**Kageyama:** Can I guess who?

**Oikawa:** If you’d like

**Kageyama:** Was it coach?

**Oikawa:** YES HE DIDN’T SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa, he’s getting old and knows like 500 more kids, cut him some slack

**Oikawa:** I say it to him every year!!!

**Iwaizumi:** You’re petty

**Oikawa:** EVEN TERUSHIMA WISHED ME A HAPPY BIRTHDAY

**Iwaizumi:** He did?

**Oikawa:** Yes

**Iwaizumi:** Why?

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN YOURE MISSING THE POINT

**Kageyama:** I think birthdays are important so I think it’s nice to say happy birthday. But I don’t think I’ve ever had a coach remember mine.

**Kageyama:** Other than Ukai

**Oikawa:** SEE TOBIO GETS IT

**Iwaizumi:** Yeah but he’s not a freak about it

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** Just don’t wish him a happy birthday and move on lmao

**Oikawa:** BUT I FEEL GUILTY

**Iwaizumi:** Would you figure this out already. It’s midnight and I want to sleep.

**Oikawa:** SORRY IWA-CHAN

**-**

**Nishinoya:** RYUU

**Tanaka:** YES

**Nishinoya:** Ennoshita is asking if you finished your homework

**Tanaka:** sorry I can’t reply I’m sleeping

**Asahi:** you just replied

**Tanaka:** sounds impossible because I’m sleeping

**Nishinoya:** HAHAH

**Tanaka:** send him this

**Tanaka:** _ attached image _

**Nishinoya:** kk

**Kenma:** okay hold on

**Kenma:** I have a question

**Tanaka:** if the question is “how did you take that pic whilst asleep?” Idk how to answer that

**Kenma:** no lmao

**Kenma:** who are you laying on???

**Kenma:** their stomach said 🏋️‍♀️🗿

**Tanaka:** oh! I’m laying in Kiyoko lmao

**Kiyoko:** ahhh

**Kenma:** Kiyoko's abs omggggg

**Kenma: 🤤🤤**

**Kuroo:** oop Kenma, your abs fetish is showing

**Kenma:** ITS NOT A FETISH I JUST KNOW A GOOD BODY WHEN I SEE ONE

**Kenma:** Kiyoko and Tanaka are just an abs couple wtf wtf

**Kiyoko:** lmao well thank you

**Kenma:** hm I’m thinking so hard

**Kenma:** Kuro if I got abs, we can also be an abs couple

**Kenma:** Wait I take it back that’d look weird

**Kenma:** Kuro I’m scared, I don’t want them

**Kuroo:** then don’t get them

**Kenna:** KURO ITS SCARY TO THINK ABOUT WHY WOULD I DO THAT

**Nishinoya:** hate to interrupt but ennoshita said fuck you and that he’s coming over

**Tanaka:** NOOOO

**Kiyoko:** what homework is it?

**Tanaka:** It’s just an essay that he said he’d correct for me

**Kiyoko:** And you didn’t write it?

**Tanaka:** it’s written!! I’m just scared of his criticism

**Nishinoya:** I’ve once seen Ennoshita go through two whole pens while editing a paper

**Kiyoko:** But I’m sure you always get good grades with his help

**Tanaka:** yes!!! He’s the best

**Tanaka:** but he’s so scary

**Nishinoya:** He’s also telling me to tell you that he’s almost there

**Tanaka:** KIYOKO SAVE ME

**Kiyoko:** I’ll stay here while he helps you lol 

**Kiyoko:** but the second you get off track I’m leaving

**Tanaka:** I PROMISE I WONT SO PLEASE STAY 

**Nishinoya:** GOOD LUCK BROSKI I BELIEVE IN YOU

**Tanaka:** IM SHAKING

**-**

**Iwaizumi:** okay so

**Iwaizumi:** Oikawa is in a zoom class rn and he’s crying?

**Iwaizumi:** do I go over there?

**Yaku:** YES GO CHECK ON HIM

**Iwaizumi:** I DIDNT KNOW BECAUSE HIS CAMERA MIGHT BE ON

**Bokuto:** hopefully he’s okay?!!!!!

-

**Iwaizumi:** okay update

**Iwaizumi:** he’s fine

**Iwaizumi:** his professor just made him very sad

**Iwaizumi:** Also he turned his camera off when things started getting sad

**Yaku:** What happened??

**Iwaizumi:** His professor was really sad because her cat had to stay overnight at the vet and like, the cat is super old

**Iwaizumi:** And he turned his camera off so he could cry

**Iwaizumi:** But now he's laughing about it

**Bokuto:** I think I would cry too!!!!

**Iwaizumi:** But the professor was super nice and let everyone spend the rest of class watching these like random cartoons that make her happy lol

**Oikawa:** All of this sounds fake

**Oikawa:** Wrong bitch

**Oikawa:** I would never cry over someone else’s sick animal ha

**Iwaizumi:** Okay so you definitely didn’t have me comfort you in the middle of your class

**Iwaizumi:** Like you didnt turn off your camera just so you could hug me

**Oikawa:** Nope, you were simply dreaming

**Iwaizumi:** Hm

**Iwaizumi:** So these pictures I have of you crying into your blanket are also made up

**Oikawa:** WHAT WHY DID YOU TAKE A PICTURE

**Oikawa:** I mean yes

**Iwaizumi:** you’re so stupid lmao

**Iwaizumi:** They were worried about you

**Yaku:** Yeah wtf Oikawa

**Oikawa:** No need to be worried because I have never cried before. Not once

**Iwaizumi:** So you didn’t cry to Melt Away the other night 

**Yaku:** You cry to Mariah Carey????

**Oikawa:** No! 

**Oikawa:** But if I did cry it would be because the song made me think of Iwa-chan

**Oikawa:** So idk what you’re talking about. MOVING ON

**Iwaizumi:** So we didn’t dance to it in the living room. And we DEFINITELY didn’t have to stop because you were crying

**Oikawa:** Yeah, that’s exactly what didn’t happen

**Iwaizumi:** You’re so stupid


	137. We're Marceline and Princess Bubblegum, change my mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama: Do it, loser
> 
> Tsukishima: Fuck you
> 
> Kageyama: Fuck you
> 
> Sugawara: Stop that
> 
> Sugawara: Also, Tsukki
> 
> Sugawara: Do it, loser

**Kenma** changed the group name to  _ Kuro👿 _

**Kuroo:** KENMA I LOVE YOU

**Kenma:** SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** I LOVE YOU

**Kenma:** I SAID SHUT UP

**Kuroo:** WELL I SAID I LOVE YOU

**Kenma:** SHUT UP SHUT UP

**Daichi:** maybe stop

**Kuroo:** DAICHI JUST THE MAN I WANTED TO SEE!!!

**Sugawara:** 🙃

**Kuroo:** SUGA MY SOULMATE

**Daichi:** 🙃

**Kuroo:** LOOK GUYS

**Kuroo:** _ attached image _

**Sugawara:** Aw thats so cute

**Kuroo:** I KNOW

**Kuroo:** Doesn’t it look like kenma!!!

**Daichi:** Yeah lol kinda does

**Kenma:** It’s a cat made of pudding… 

**Kuroo:** I BOUGHT IT BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE HIM AND HE REFUSES TO GET A MATCHING ONE

**Kenma:** That’s embarrassing

**Sugawara:** Aww I think that’s cute! I would buy one if Daichi asked

**Kenma:** Of course you would

**Akaashi:** Me and Bokuto have matching keychains

**Kenma:** Of course you do

**Akaashi:** They’re owls. Bokuto says they look like me

**Kenma:** Of course he does

**Akaashi:** Can you say something else

**Kuroo:** Kenma, if you hate me you can just tell me

**Kenma:** cool

**Kenma:** I hate you

**Kuroo:** I LOVE YOU

**Kenma:** UGH

**Oikawa:** Why don’t you just get a matching one Kenma?? It’s just a cute keychain

**Kenma:** Because I wanted the black cat in the apple pie!!!!

**Kenma:** It looked like Kuro

**Sugawara:** You could always get the other one Kenma. It’s still matching in a way. Yours will just look like Kuroo

**Kenma:** …

**Kenma:** Kuro take me to the store

**Kuroo:** YAYYY THANK YOU SUGAAA

**Sugawara:** Wtf you’re welcome 

**-**

**Nishinoya:** Asahi is so romantic omggggg

**Asahi:** Lol what?

**Nishinoya:** You’re so romantic

**Sugawara:** Aw Asahi, no need to be shy!!

**Sugawara:** What’d you do?

**Asahi:** I don’t know???

**Nishinoya:** He just left my place so he could go to class

**Nishinoya:** But he dropped me some m&ms 

**Asahi:** omg

**Sugawara:** Aw, are m&ms your favorite candy?

**Nishinoya:** Nope

**Nishinoya:** But Asahi likes trail mix!! But he doesn’t care for the candy inside

**Nishinoya:** He always accidentally buys the wrong one

**Nishinoya:** And he picked out all the m&ms and gave them to me because he knows i’ll eat them

**Asahi:** Noya this makes me look so bad

**Nishinoya:** WHAT WHY

**Asahi:** That wasn’t supposed to be a romantic gesture, I just thought you’d want them because you usually do.

**Sugawara:** ASAHI

**Asahi:** omg

**Sugawara:** You need to appreciate Noya more!!!

**Sugawara:** My poor Nishinoya! He thinks receiving scraps is romantic

**Nishinoya:** Yeah Asahi!!! APPRECIATE ME MORE

**Asahi:** I’m in class right now

**Nishinoya:** Then take me on a date afterwards!

**Asahi:** Okay

**Sugawara:** And make it romantic!!! 

**Nishinoya:** YEAH MAKE IT ROMANTIC ASAHI!!

**Asahi:** Okay lol, I’ll see you after class Yuu❤️

**Nishinoya:** AHHH SEE YOU SOON OMGOMG

**Oikawa:** I just caught up with the chat

**Oikawa:** What the hell is happening

**Nishinoya:** Asahi is so cute 🥺

**Sugawara:** Noya lmaooo

**Nishinoya:** And we’re going on a date tonight 🥺

**Sugawara:** You’re so easy to please aw aw

**Nishinoya:** I just think everything Asahi does is amazing

**Oikawa:** That’s so cute wtf

**Oikawa:** But noya, Asahi does do romantic stuff right?

**Nishinoya:** Yes!! ALL THE TIME I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

**Oikawa:** okay good

**Sugawara:** He better 🙃

**-**

**Nishinoya:** AHAHAHAS GUYS GUYS 

**Asahi** Noya omg

**Daichi:** ???

**Nishinoya:** So Asahi and I finished our little dinner date

**Nishinoya:** It was super fun!! OMG HE TOOK ME OUT TO A FANCY PLACE AND I WORE MY HAIR DOWN BECAUSE I CAN READ THE ROOM UGH IT WAS SO NICE BUT ANYWAYS

**Nishinoya:** We were walking around some shops and omg omg

**Nishinoya:** This little girl comes up to us and she’s like looking up at Asahi

**Nishinoya:** And she looks so excited

**Nishinoya:** she was super polite!! She was like “excuse me sir, does your daughter watch Miraculous Ladybug?”

**Asahi:** AHHH

**Daichi:** that’s so cute

**Daichi:** What did you say Asahi?

**Asahi:** NO

**Daichi:** did you scream at her!?

**Asahi:** NO HAHA

**Asahi:** I just didn’t know what else to say and then I tried to walk away but she kinda just followed me and Noya wasn’t helping at all

**Nishinoya:** because you got so nervous lmaooo

**Asahi:** she just thought I had a kid…

**Nishinoya:** ITS SO FUNNY TO ME

**Daichi:** you just said no and tried to walk away!!?!?

**Asahi:** I DIDNT KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO WHY WAS SHE JUST FOLLOWING US

**Daichi:** she probably wanted to know what your daughter watches

**Asahi:** DAICHI I DONT HAVE A DAUGHTER

**Daichi:** if you told her that I’m sure she would’ve went back to her parents

**Asahi:** omg I’m so dumb

**Nishinoya:** HAHAHA ASAHI I LOVE YOU

**Daichi:** so embarrassing for no reason

**-**

**Tsukishima:** I have a bone to pick with Suga 

**Sugawara:** okay, what’s up?

**Tsukishima:** stop blowing kisses to Daichi while we’re practicing

**Iwaizumi:** omg Oikawa does that too

**Iwaizumi:** so Mattsun and Maki do it too, just to make him mad

**Daichi:** just everyone blowing kisses to Iwaizumi lmao

**Iwaizumi:** yes lmao

**Sugawara:** maybe I’ll do it the next time we see you lol

**Tsukishima:** no stop blowing kisses in general

**Sugawara:** are you upset because I don’t blow any to you?

**Tsukishima:** so you want me to vomit

**Sugawara:** rude!!!

**Daichi:** more for me then

**Daichi:** because I think it’s cute

**Tsukishima:** sure you would

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki let them have fun

**Sugawara:** Thank you!!

**Tsukishima:** it’s disgusting

**Kageyama:** I think it’s cute too

**Sugawara:** Thank you!!! 

**Sugawara:** Tsukki you suck

**Yamaguchi:** yeah Tsukki, you suck

**Kageyama:** yeah Tsukki

**Sugawara:** Also, blame Daichi!!

**Daichi:** Me????!!!

**Sugawara:** I wouldn’t blow you so many kisses if you didn’t just stare at me when we practice

**Daichi:** Well if that’s the case, blame Suga!

**Sugawara:** WHY ME?!

**Daichi:** If you weren’t so cute, I wouldn’t spend practice just staring at you

**Sugawara:** Daichi🥺💗

**Daichi:** lol💗

**Tsukishima:** wow

**Tsukishima:** I hate everything even more somehow

**Daichi:** What do you want me to say??? I’m sorry my boyfriend looks good in shorts??

**Tsukishima:** I want to leave the team

**Kageyama:** Do it, loser

**Tsukishima:** Fuck you

**Kageyama:** Fuck you

**Sugawara:** Stop that

**Sugawara:** Also, Tsukki

**Sugawara:** Do it, loser

**Yamaguchi:** HAHAHAH

**Daichi:** Wait, is it that obvious when I stare at Suga

**Tsukishima:** YES

**Kageyama:** Lol yeah

**Hinata:** YES OMG

**Daichi:** Ooops lol

**Tsukishima:** You’re just self aware….

**Tsukishima:** Anyways, it’s unprofessional

**Sugawara:** Not my fault you’re homophobic

**Tsukishima:** What no

**Hinata:** LMAOOOO

**Yamaguchi:** So mean Tsukki

**Tsukishima:** Omg

**Sugawara:** Find a better boyfriend Yamaguchi

**Yamaguchi:** Maybe Kunimi

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi

**Yamaguchi:** I’m joking

**Sugawara:** He isn’t

**Sugawara:** TSUKKI I’M GONNA BLOW DAICHI EXTRA KISSES TOMORROW

**Tsukishima:** For some reason my brain didn’t see the extra kisses part and I was confused as to why you were telling me that

**Sugawara:** I mean... that too

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki is just really tired and he asked me to come over but I couldn’t today so he’s extra grumpy

**Tsukishima** left the group

**Sugawara** added  **Tsukishima** to the group

**Tsukishima:** Leave me to die

**Sugawara:** lmaoooooo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so funny story, me and the other author actually know a few people that think we're in love and they kinda ship us... Anyways, we wanna talk to you guys more and we thought of making a discord for all of us but idk how to use discord oops. If you guys want to though, I'll figure it out!!


	138. my brain today has just been so ill watch 👀 your life in pictures 🤳 like I used to watch you sleep 😴 and Ill feel you forget me 💭 like I used to feel you breathe 😭

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kuroo: Kenma if mpreg were real you would be so pregnant right now 
> 
> Kenma: What the fuck
> 
> Kenma: Please never say that to me again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo I wrote like one of those side story things that we mentioned a while back ago-- it's just about Iwaizumi and Oikawa adopting their puppy. If you want you can read it before this chapter, but that's totally optional of course!:-)

_ Kuro👿 _

**Oikawa:** I’m not cut out to be a father

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up, stupid

**Sugawara:** Shut up, stupid

**Kenma:** Shut up, stupid

**Hinata:** Shut up, stupid

**Kageyama:** What happened?

**Oikawa:** TOBIO (๑♡⌓♡๑)

**Oikawa:** SO OUR NEW PUPPY

**Oikawa:** We got him yesterday

**Sugawara:** we know

**Oikawa:** SUGA SHUT UP

**Oikawa:** ANYWAYS HIS FIRST NIGHT

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN HAD AN OVERNIGHT SO HE WAS WORKING AND SORA ALWAYS SLEEPS ON THE BED SO I LET THE NEW PUPPY SLEEP  ON THE BED TOO

**Oikawa:** His name is Ikko 

**Daichi:** How cute

**Kita:** Cute

**Oikawa:** Ikr! Kenma helped pick out the name (▰∀◕)ﾉ

**Kuroo:** Periodt 😌💅🏼

**Oikawa:** ANYWAYS YES IKKO IS CUTE BUT WHAT HAPPENED WAS NOT CUTE BECAUSE HE SHIT ON MY BLANKET

**Oikawa:** and I was so tired that I didn’t know what else to do other than push the blanket off the bed (ｏ´_｀ｏ)

**Kenma:** You didn’t wake up and clean it?

**Oikawa:** IT WAS 3AM?

**Kenma:** You didn’t wake up and clean it?

**Oikawa:** KENMA I CAN’T JUST WAKE UP THAT FAST

**Oikawa:** I WAS HALF ASLEEP WHEN I DID IT, I BARELY REMEMBER IT HAPPENING

**Iwaizumi:** You’re so dumb

**Iwaizumi:** I came home to him shivering because he was so cold without the blanket

**Oikawa:** No, I was cold because my Iwa-chan wasn’t there to warm me up 🥺

**Iwaizumi:** No, you were definitely cold because you didn’t have a blanket

**Iwaizumi:** Idiot

**Sugawara:** AHAHA OIKAWA YOU’RE SO DUMB

**Oikawa:** I AM NOT

**Oikawa:** I WAS HALF ASLEEP

**Oikawa:** ANYWAYS

**Oikawa:** That’s a sign that fatherhood isn’t for me

**Iwaizumi:** _ attached image _

**Iwaizumi:** You say that, but you don’t go anywhere without that stupid dog

**Oikawa:** HE ISN’T STUPID

**Oikawa:** HE’S A BABY

**Sugawara:** IWAIZUMI HE’S A BABY

**Kenma:** you guys sound so stupid right now

**Oikawa:** _ attached image _

**Oikawa:** He likes to sleep on Iwa-chan’s feet when he does dishes 🥺

**Atsumu:** OMG OMG

**Atsumu:** Shinsuke can we get a puppy when we move in together (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)

**Kita:** Darlin I already said we could

**Atsumu:** (人´∀｀)．☆．。．:*･°

**Hinata:** Tobio we should get a pet!!!

**Hinata:** If stupid atsumu is gonna get one, I want one too!

**Atsumu:** HEY???

**Kageyama:** Lol maybe

**Atsumu:** YOU’RE JUST GONNA SAY MAYBE AND NOT DEFEND ME???

**Kageyama:** I have bad allergies with most dogs and like all cats lol

**Hinata:** Oh yeah (_ _|||)

**Kageyama:** We can get a fish?

**Hinata:** OKAY!!!!

**Oikawa:** Shouyou, you’re so easy to please

**Sugawara:** No, he just isn’t a high maintenance freak 

**Oikawa:** OKAY WOW

**Oikawa:** COMING FROM YOU KOUSHI

**Sugawara:** Idk what you mean ʕ⊙ᴥ⊙ʔ

**Nishinoya:** _ attached image _

**Nishinoya:** I don’t care what you guys are talking about because I’m too busy looking at Asahi with Suzu

**Nishinoya:** Our daughter Suzu

**Nishinoya:** Who we love

**Nishinoya:** Who doesn’t watch miraculous ladybug

**Asahi:** WHY ARE YOU BRINGING THAT UP

**Nishinoya:** Our daughter Suzu who 

**Nishinoya:** Is better than all of your pets

**Daichi:** I thought you hated her?

**Nishinoya:** UM WAIT

**Nishinoya:** I DO

**Nishinoya:** BUT

**Nishinoya:** UM

**Sugawara:** JUST ADMIT YOU LOVE YOUR CAT??

**Nishinoya:** I DON’T

**Nishinoya:** I JUST KNOW THAT SHE’S THE BEST 

**Nishinoya:** BUT I DON’T LIKE HER

**Nishinoya:** SHE’S ANNOYING AND SLEEPS ON ASAHI WHEN I WANT TO SLEEP ON HIM 😡🤬

**Asahi:** Yuu...

**Sugawara:** Sounds like you love her…

**Nishinoya:** Don’t talk to me

**Nishinoya:** I’m embarrassed goodbye

**Asahi:** I think he forgot he was supposed to hate her lol

**Nishinoya:** ASAHI!

**Asahi:** Lol

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki with a dog….

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi

**Yamaguchi:** NO GUYS THINK ABOUT IT

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki with a dog (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki playing with a dog (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi also having a dog because if I get one, it’ll be his too

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)

**Tsukishima:** Stop

**Tsukishima:** You’re so embarrassing

**Sugawara:** Aww Tsukishima you would be such a cute dog dad

**Sugawara:** SO WOULD YOU YAMAGUCHI OMG OMG

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki let’s get a dog!!

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi we don’t even live together yet..

**Atsumu:** Well??? What are you waiting for, moron???

**Tsukishima:** Excuse me

**Tsukishima:** You don’t live with your boyfriend either

**Atsumu:** ACTUALLY I will in a few months 

**Atsumu:** We’re looking into apartments ♡´･ᴗ･`♡

**Sugawara:** AWWW CUTE

**Osamu:** WHAT WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME

**Kita:** Because we just got off the phone about it like ten minutes ago

**Kita:** And this is the first time we’ve talked about it

**Kita:** I think he’s a little overexcited

**Atsumu:** NO???

**Atsumu:** I have an appropriate level of excitement, thanks

**Kita:** Okay

**Atsumu:** EW SHIN I’M FACETIMING YOU AGAIN 

**Kita:** What? Okay?

**Atsumu:** YOU’RE SO CUTE

**Osamu:** He literally just said okay

**Sugawara:** AHAHA ATSUMU WTF

\--

**Sugawara:** Ugh ugh ugh

**Sugawara:** Guys

**Sugawara:** Wouldn’t it be so cute if i had a baby that looks just like daichi 🥺

**Daichi:** Okay but like

**Daichi:** But what if the baby looked like you 🥺

**Sugawara:** No no no

**Daichi:** Yes yes, think about it

**Daichi:** You, Sugawara Koushi, holding a baby that looks just like you (Sugawara Koushi) 🥺

**Kuroo:** Why did you type it like that

**Sugawara:** No but Daichi 🥺 what if we had a baby that looked like you and acted like me 🥺

**Sugawara:** Cute 🥺

**Oikawa:** Why are we talking about this?

**Sugawara:** … You’ve never thought about something like this?

**Oikawa:** Of course I have!! A baby that looks just like Iwa-chan and has his cute grumpy face would be SO CUTE!!

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up omg

**Sugawara:** I wish mpreg was real (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)

**Atsumu:** …

**Atsumu:** I do not

**Kita:** A baby atsumu…. No thank you

**Atsumu:** SHINSUKE WHAT

**Atsumu:** Our baby would be so cute (◕︿◕✿)

**Kita:** Sure it would. But still, no thank you

**Suna:** MY BABY WOULD BE CUTE

**Osamu:** YES

**Kuroo:** Kenma if mpreg were real you would be so pregnant right now 

**Kenma:** What the fuck

**Kenma:** Please never say that to me again

**Oikawa:** Um?? Use protection wtf

**Oikawa:** Use condoms 🕺😍 to protect ⚔️ you and your partner 🐱😼 against unwanted 🙅‍♂️ hypothetical male pregnancies 🏃‍♀️🤰 and std’s 🙉🐒

**Atsumu:** that was beautiful oikawa 

**Oikawa:** I have a boyfriend ❤️

**Kenma:** We do use condoms but like

**Kenma:** Things happen sometimes

**Kuroo:** They do be breaking 🕺 like kenma’s back 😛

**Kenma:** Kuro shut up

**Oikawa:** ...

**Oikawa:** This

**Oikawa:** I’m suddenly feeling uncomfortable 

**Oikawa:** I need to go

**Oikawa:** Come on Iwa-chan

**Oikawa** has removed  **Iwaizumi** from the chat

**Oikawa** has left the chat

**Sugawara:** AHAHAHA

**Sugawara:** KUROO WTF

**Nishinoya:** YESSS KUROO

**Kenma:** Please don’t encourage him

**Tsukishima:** Ew

**Tsukishima:** As much as I hate to join in

**Tsukishima:** Tadashi with a baby that looks like us...

**Tsukishima:** …

**Sugawara:** Tsukishima!! You’re so close to sounding cute and excited!! Keep going!!

**Tsukishima:** Bye

**Tsukishima** has left the chat

**Yamaguchi:** AHAHAHA TSUKKI

**Kenma:** suga why are you even thinking about mpreg right now?

**Kenma:** You’re so scary

**Kenma:** That sounds so scary

**Sugawara:** No 😋 I just want a baby

**Kenma:** So you want to be pregnant?

**Sugawara:** No

**Kenma:** …

**Kageyama:** What brought this on?

**Kageyama:** Also me and Shouyou having a baby sounds horrible. We’d both be horrible dads right now

**Hinata:** Only because we aren’t ready!

**Kageyama:** True

**Daichi:** Lol he just wants a baby because we went to the store and they bad a really cute baby outfit

**Sugawara:** WE NEED TO HAVE A BABY SO I CAN BUY IT

**Sugawara:** IT WAS LIKE ONE OF THOSE ZIP UP ONESIES THAT COVER THEIR FEET 

**Sugawara:** AND IT HAD A HOOD AND IT WAS FUZZY WITH LITTLE TEDDY BEAR EARS

**Sugawara:** DAICHIII WE NEED TO HAVE A BABY

**Daichi:** Lol not right now baby

**Sugawara:** 😠😠 but daichi

**Daichi:** Sugaaaa

**Kuroo:** You guys are being kind of scary right now

**Kuroo:** Can we talk about something else

**Sugawara:** I GUESS

**Sugawara:** Let’s talk about how cute Daichi is 😋

**Kuroo:** Oh good!! Finally a conversation I can actively participate in!

**Sugawara:** Nevermind

**Sugawara:** Kuroo I hate you

**Sugawara:** I’m going to go take a nap

**Kuroo:** LMAO

**Kuroo:** Goodnight suga!!

**Sugawara:** Goodnight!!

**Kenma:** A nap sounds so good 

**Kenma:** Kuro come nap with me

**Kuroo:** Okay kitten lol

**Kuroo:** Night guys!

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello again teehee so we made a discord and here's the link join if u want bye (*´ω｀*) https://discord.com/invite/mW6sVqR


	139. All day I've just been "tsuyoku nareru riyuu wo shitta boKU WO TSURETTE SUSUME DOU SHITATTE KESENAI YUME MO TOMARENAI IMA MO" or "Well maybe it's me and my blind optimism to blame"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: DUDE AKAASHI HAHAHA WAIT THAT IS SO FUNNY. LIKE THE THOUGHT OF YOU GETTING UP BRIGHT AND EARLY TO THROW ASS I CAN'T HANDLE IT

**Sugawara** changed the group name to  _!!!! _

**Sugawara:** Everyone meet Yuki!

**Sugawara:** _ Attached image _

**Sugawara:** We just picked her up today and she’s a sweet little puppy angel who’s hair is already all over the place

**Sugawara:** But Daichi is a genius and bought a better vacuum the other day

**Hinata:** SHE’S SO CUTE CAN ME AND TOBIO MEET HER???

**Sugawara:** Yes! Come over for dinner!

**Kageyama:** :-) we’ll be there

**Sugawara:** Your allergies though

**Kageyama:** We’ll be there

**Atsumu:** Suga, idk how to tell you this

**Atsumu:** that’s a full grown dog, not a puppy.

**Sugawara:** actually you’re wrong. She is me and daichi’s baby and will remain a puppy forever

**Osamu:** yeah tsumu. Stupid ass bitch

**Atsumu:** hey man fuck you

**Osamu:** No

**Sugawara:** Anyways

**Sugawara:** She’s so cute omg

**Asahi:** Ohhh you guys adopted her right?

**Sugawara:** Yes!! She’s well trained too

**Sugawara:** But she’s got a little bit of separation anxiety. Like, Daichi went to work and I was in the shower and she sat at the door for a while before going into our room and like

**Sugawara:** She was sleeping on one of his shirts and a pair of my socks

**Asahi:** Well, she’s in a very loving home

**Yamaguchi:** Yeah omg!!

**Sugawara:** And we’re gonna introduce her to all of our loving friends!!

**Nishinoya:** EPIC

**Tanaka:** AMAZING

**Asahi:** awww

**Oikawa:** Sugawara hear me out

**Oikawa:** We introduce our dogs to each other

**Sugawara:** Omg YES

**Daichi:** Maybe ask Iwaizumi first

**Oikawa:** I wear the pants in this relationship so what I say goes

**Iwaizumi:** We already talked about it

**Sugawara:** Okay guys, I’m gonna get dinner ready!!!

**Kuroo:** SUGA SEND MORE PUPPY PICTURES

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** I threw in a bonus selfie

**Kuroo:** Yeah but I asked for puppy pictures, not a selfie

**Daichi:** Kuroo shut up he looks so cute in that picture I’m saving it a million times

**Sugawara:** Lmaooo Daichi 😚

**Daichi:** 😚 you’re so cute omg

**Osamu:** Can I save the picture a million times too?

**Daichi:** No

**Suna:** Fuck off Samu

**Osamu: 🤕🤕**

-

**Oikawa:** I just splashed myself in the face with coffee (●♡∀♡)

**Iwaizumi:** Idiot

**Iwaizumi:** Was it hot?? Are you okay???

**Oikawa:** Nope, it was cooled down because I made it and then did 10000 things before drinking

**Kuroo:** How did that happen to you?

**Oikawa:** I was walking up the stairs, slipped a little bit and my coffee was all over my face

**Sugawara:** Coffee facial tingz

**Sugawara:** Omg wait

**Sugawara:** Facial tingz

**Sugawara:** _ Attached Image _

**Daichi:** SUGAWARA

**Kuroo:** I-

**Nishinoya:** The amount of pictures Suga has of himself with cum on his face

**Nishinoya:** Amazing!! I can’t get enough

**Nishinoya:** AWESOME JOB DAICHI

**Daichi:** omg

**Akaashi:** Facial tingz

**Akaashi:** _ Attached Image _

**Sugawara:** YOU LOOKS SO CUTE AKAASHI

**Kuroo:** Are we really doing this again? Just sending scary pictures again

**Akaashi:** You look cute too Suga

**Bokuto:** AHHH AKAASHI 

**Akaashi:** ?

**Bokuto:** YOU LOOK SO HOT BY WHY DID YOU SEND THAT

**Akaashi:** Because suga sent one

**Akaashi:** Why are you embarrassed? You’re the one who did it

**Bokuto:** WHAT THEY DONT KNOW THAT

**Akaashi:** Bokuto

**Akaashi:** You’re my boyfriend

**Akaashi:** They do know

**Bokuto:** AHHHH

**Sugawara:** it’s okay lol don’t be embarrassed

**Oikawa:** You two should be embarrassed, Suga and Akaashi

**Oikawa:** You took my innocent story and turned it into something raunchy

**Sugawara:** Go cry about it

**Oikawa:** Maybe I will

**Sugawara:** Good

**Sugawara:** loser

**Oikawa:** I hate you

**Sugawara:** Good

**Oikawa:** Omg

**Sugawara:** Can you hurry up so me and Daichi can come over?

**Oikawa:** Omg yes!!

**Oikawa:** I’m ready now

**Sugawara:** Okay!!! We’re on our way!!!!

**Oikawa:** I’M SHAKING IM SO EXCITED

**Oikawa:** Hurry up!!!!

**Iwaizumi:** See you guys soon

**Asahi:** Plans in the groupchat 😍

**Sugawara:** Is Asahi sad that he wasnt invited?

**Asahi:** No

**Sugawara:** Aw is little baby Asahi gonna cry??

**Asahi:** No

**Sugawara:** Get a dog and you’d be invited

**Daichi:** Suga, leave him alone omg

**Asahi:** I have Suzu, she’s more than enough for me

**Nishinoya:** What if Asahi puts me on a leash? Can we be invited then?

**Daichi:** ... 

**Asahi:** …

**Asahi:** I don’t want that

**Iwaizumi:** I’m gonna speak for the group and say please do not come over on a leash

**Sugawara:** Oh I was gonna say yes

**Oikawa:** I’m gonna agree with Iwa-chan

**Daichi:** Suga…

**Sugawara:** Daichi! We cannot kink shame here!

**Daichi:** Yes but people can keep their kinks to themselves

**Sugawara:** Coming from you, daddy

**Daichi:** SUGAWARA

**Daichi:** YOU ARE THE ONE WHO BRINGS IT UP ALL THE TIME

**Sugawara:** But you dont stop me

**Daichi:** You wouldn’t stop if I tried

**Sugawara:** Well, all I’m saying is that if Noya and Asahi want to come over

**Sugawara:** And Noya just so happens to be on a leash

**Asahi:** We wouldn’t do this

**Sugawara:** I wouldn’t judge

**Sugawara:** Maybe I’d talk to Daichi about you behind your back and never invite you over again

**Sugawara:** But I’d never say anything to your face

**Nishinoya:** Thank you Suga

**Oikawa:** Not you thinking shit talking behind your back is good

**Nishinoya:** It’s not necessarily good but it’s better than kink shaming in front of everyone

**Asahi:** I just want to clear something up

**Asahi:** Me and noya

**Asahi:** We don’t own a leash. Just so you know

**Daichi:** Okay lmaoo thank you for clearing that up

**Daichi:** Also, Oikawa and Iwaizumi we’re here

**Oikawa:** YAY IWA-CHAN GO ANSWER THE DOOR

**Iwaizumi:** Wut

**Oikawa:** I’M ALL THE WAY IN THE KITCHEN

**Iwaizumi:** That’s closer than I am

**Oikawa:** Please

**Iwaizumi:** Fine

**-**

**Oikawa:** _ Attached image _

**Oikawa:** They’re just being such dog dads

**Sugawara:** Just drinking and watching the dogs play wtf

**Sugawara:** Ew my daichi is so handsome wtf

**Oikawa:** Ew ew Iwa-chan too

**Oikawa:** Ikko is too little but Yuki keeps sniffing him

**Sugawara:** IT’S SO CUTE

**Atsumu:** The domesticity radiating off of that pic

**Atsumu:** IMAGINE THIS RIGHT

**Atsumu:** ME AND OSAMU JUST CRACKING OPEN AN ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGE WHILE SUNA AND KITA PLAY WITH OUR FUTURE PETS SOUNDS CUTE

**Osamu:** I don’t want to be anywhere near you

**Atsumu:** Well fuck you then I hate your guts

**Osamu:** You stupid bitch, you’re gonna treat your brother like that

**Atsumu:** YOU’RE THE ONE WHO WAS BEING MEAN

**Osamu:** WELL WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO ABOUT IT

**Atsumu:** NOT BE AN ASSHOLE TF

**Atsumu:** I guess I’ll just crack open an alcoholic beverage with Kageyama

**Hinata:** No, I dont want to be near you either

**Atsumu:** I LOVE YOU HINATA WHY

**Atsumu:** ALSO YOU DONT HAVE TO BE NEAR ME YOU HAVE TO BE NEAR KITA

**Hinata:** Kita omg 😍

**Kita:** 😍Hinata

**Atsumu:** WTF

**Hinata:** I dont want to be near anyone who was in love with my boyfriend

**Atsumu:** THAT'S THE WHOLE GROUP CHAT BASICALLY

**Hinata:** That’s exactly why I text you guys instead of talking to you in person

**Kageyama:** Lmao hinata shut up

**Daichi:** Hinata sounds like suga

**Sugawara:** Good ☺️

**Atsumu:** I fucking hate this town

**-**

**Akaashi** and  **Kenma**

**Akaashi:** I had a strange dream

**Kenma:** Oh? Was it a nightmare?

**Akaashi:** No, not a nightmare lol it was just weird

**Akaashi:** Kind of embarrassing

**Kenma:** What happened???

**Akaashi:** Okay so I was out for lunch with you and Kuroo and we just talked and then I went home and like omg

**Akaashi:** It’s so embarrassing

**Akaashi:** You know that thing that’s been going around tik tok

**Akaashi:** like people have been giving to tutorials on how to like

**Akaashi:** Shake your ass really easily and like how it looks when you bend over

**Kenma:** Keiji omg 

**Kenma:** Yes i’ve seen the tiktoks

**Kenma:** I’M ALREADY LAUGHING

**Akaashi:** Okay so not saying I practice daily because I want to learn how

**Akaashi:** But that’s exactly what I do

**Akaashi:** Moving on

**Akaashi:** In my dream I did it really well and I was so happy that I cried

**Akaashi:** And then I woke up at like 7, tried it, got embarrassed that dream me could do it but not real me, and then went back to sleep

**Kenma:** YOU JUST WOKE UP AT 7 TO SHAKE ASS KEIJI AHAHA

**Akaashi:** Omg omg stopppp

**Akaashi:** It was just an experiment 

**Kenma:** I’ll be manifesting ass shakability for you

**Akaashi:** It’s much appreciated

**Kenma:** DUDE AKAASHI HAHAHA WAIT THAT IS SO FUNNY. LIKE THE THOUGHT OF YOU GETTING UP BRIGHT AND EARLY TO THROW ASS I CAN'T HANDLE IT

**Akaashi:** HAHAHA SHUT UP

**Kenma:** But actually can you really not do it? Like the tiktok thing?

**Akaashi:** NO I CAN’T AND IT KINDA PISSES ME OFF BECAUSE BOKUTO CAN DO IT

**Kenma:** …

**Akaashi:** HE HAS SO MUCH ASS FOR NO REASON

**Kenma:** AKAASHI AHAHA WTF

**Akaashi:** ITS TRUE HAVE YOU NOT SEEN IT??

**Akaashi:** Wait, don’t look at my boyfriend’s ass

**Kenma:** I don’t want to

**Akaashi:** Wait why not? Do you not think he’s hot? Or handsome?

**Akaashi:** Well you’re wrong

**Kenma:** Omg Akaashi wut

**Kenma:** Shut up lmaooooo

**Akaashi:** HAHAHA

**-**

_!!!! _

**Bokuto:** HELP

**Kuroo:** What happened??????

**Bokuto:** I CAN’T THINK OF ANYTHING BUT AKAASHI LEGS TODAY

**Akaashi:** Oh my

**Akaashi:** Maybe don’t tell everyone that lol

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI HELP ME

**Akaashi:** I don’t know how

**Bokuto:** COME SIT ON MY LAP OR SOMETHING

**Akaashi:** Okay lol

**Kenma:** Bokuto

**Bokuto:** KENMA HELLO

**Kenma:** Akaashi was thinking about your ass earlier

**Akaashi:** KENMA WTF

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI COME OVER NOW PLEASE

**Akaashi:** omg omg

**Kuroo:** Yeah Akaashi, go over there now please

**Kenma:** Yeah Akaashi😼

**Nishinoya:** AKAASHI HURRY HURRY

**Sugawara:** PERIODT GO AKAASHI

  
  



	140. I think my mental state when I wrote this episode is very telling so um anyways 🙃🕺Maybe we got lost in translation maybe I asked for too much 🙃🕺 so I’ll watch your life in pictures like I used to watch you sleep 🙃🕺

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Atsumu: Stop lying…
> 
> Osamu: YOU STOP LYING
> 
> Kenma: I’m so close to killing both of you

_!!!! _

**Kuroo:** Hey so

**Kuroo:** I’m crying ❤️

**Sugawara:** What happened??

**Sugawara:** Who do I need to fight??? 😋

**Sugawara:** Was it you Kenma???

**Sugawara:** I don’t think I can fight Kenma

**Sugawara:** KUROO WHYA REN’T YOU RESPONDING

**Akaashi:** It’s been one minute, please try to calm down

**Sugawara:** NO

**Sugawara:** KUROO WHERE ARE YOU

**Kuroo:** it wasn’t kenma

**Sugawara:** Thank god

**Sugawara:** Kenma I don’t think I could have fought you

**Kenma:** Thanks I guess

**Sugawara:** WAIT KUROO WHY ARE YOU CRYING WHO DID THIS TO YOU

**Kuroo:** Taylor Swift 😔

**Oikawa:** What

**Kuroo:** SO LIKE

**Kuroo:** I was listening to last kiss

**Kuroo:** Which is the saddest song ever but like

**Kuroo:** I was trying to concentrate on something so I was listening to my music with headphones and

**Kuroo:** 4:26

**Kuroo:** THE BREATH SHE TAKES IS SO SHAKY

**Kuroo:** MY HEART IS SHATTERED

**Kuroo:** i’d say i don’t believe in love right now but kenma is hugging me and rubbing my back because i’m upset 

**Akaashi:** Why are you crying over that omg

**Kuroo:** IDK THAT SONG ALWAYS MAKES ME SO SAD 

**Kuroo:** When she says he kisses her in the middle of saying something 🥺 you know who does that 🥺🥺

**Kenma:** stop

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Kuroo:** KENMA I DON’T WANT TO WATCH YOUR LIFE IN PICTURES LIKE I USED TO WATCH YOU SLEEP

**Kenma:** You won’t, idiot

**Kenma:** We’re getting married and dying together

**Oikawa:** You could have just said growing old together but okay

**Kenma:** No we’re dying together 

**Akaashi:** What

**Kenma:** He can’t die before me

**Kenma:** Oh god

**Oikawa:** What

**Oikawa:** Stop

**Kenma:** TETSUROU YOU CAN’T DIE BEFORE ME

**Kuroo:** KENMAAA

**Oikawa:** You guys are fucking insane

**Atsumu:** I hate Last Kiss 🧍‍♂️

**Kuroo:** WHY

**Kuroo:** IT’S SO GOOD

**Atsumu:** Um

**Atsumu:** Because of the i don’t know how to be someone you miss part 😀😀

**Osamu:** …

**Osamu:** Baby bro… 

**Osamu:** It’ll be okay baby bro

**Kita:** Atsumu omg

**Kita:** I’m so sorry

**Atsumu:** SHINSUKE NO IT’S OKAY

**Sugawara:** WHY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT THIS

**Atsumu:** AHAHA IDK

**Atsumu:** Last kiss just makes me so sad 🕺😛 i’ll watch your life in pictures like i used to watch you sleep 😭

**Atsumu:** i wake up a lot in the middle of the night and while i was at his house i would just watch him because he looks so 🥰✨🥺🦊 when he sleeps

**Atsumu:** so spoiler alert but that hit a little different 😛

**Kita:** ATSUMU I’M SORRY

**Atsumu:** SHIN I ALREADY SAID IT’S OKAY

**Daichi:** Then stop talking about it, he probably feels bad lol

**Sugawara:** If it makes you guys feel any better one time daichi and I accidentally broke up with each other

**Atsumu:** That doesn’t make me feel better because shin did it on purpose 🕺

**Atsumu:** BUT ALSO WTF I WANNA HEAR THE STORY

**Daichi:** Koushi 🙃

**Oikawa:** WAIT WTF

**Kuroo:** DAICHI??

**Kuroo:** THIS IS NEWS TO ME

**Sugawara:** Omg okay so like

**Sugawara:** It was during our first year of university and like 🙃

**Sugawara:** I was really stressed about one of my classes. I think I was failing it idk

**Sugawara:** And Daichi came over and I was crying and ranting to him about it but then we ended up getting in an argument for some reason??

**Daichi:** It was because I told you that you never went to that class or did your homework

**Sugawara:** OH YEAH

**Sugawara:** IT WAS BECAUSE YOU WERE SIDING AGAINST ME

**Daichi:** I WASN’T SIDING AGAINST YOU

**Daichi:** I WAS POINTING IT OUT

**Sugawara:** SIDING AGAINST ME

**Sugawara:** Anyways I told him that he was stressing me out and then WASN’T THINKING AND WAS LIKE

**Sugawara:** I just want stress out of my life

**Sugawara:** Or something like that

**Sugawara:** AND YOU KNOW WHAT DAICHI DID???

**Oikawa:** He left didn’t he

**Sugawara:** YES

**Daichi:** I’m SORRY

**Daichi:** I THOUGHT YOU WERE BREAKING UP WITH ME

**Sugawara:** WELL THAT’S STUPID WHY WOULD I DO THAT

**Daichi:** BECAUSE I WAS STRESSING YOU OUT AND YOU WANTED STRESS OUT OF YOUR LIFE

**Sugawara:** I WASN’T PAYING ATTENTION TO WHAT I SAID AND YOU WALKED OUT

**Sugawara:** And then we didn’t talk for like a week

**Sugawara:** And I was ✨destroyed✨

**Daichi:** Me too :-(

**Atsumu:** YOU GUYS ARE SO DUMB

**Oikawa:** OMFG

**Atsumu:** Did you guys cry to taylor swift all week 😀

**Suna:** No I actually cried to on my own on the les mis soundtrack

**Kuroo:** AHAHAHA

**Atsumu:** WAIT

**Atsumu:** Okay wait so since we’re talking about this

**Atsumu:** And I am now listening to taylor swift and crying because of how much i miss shin

**Atsumu:** If you guys got broken up with what Taylor Swift song would you cry to and why?

**Sugawara:** It depends on the scenario

**Sugawara:** Because if he broke up with me for no reason it would probably be something like exile but if he cheated on me it would be dear john

**Sugawara:** And if I did something to him it might be betty because I would feel bad because I love him so much

**Oikawa:** Yeah I think I need a scenario as well

**Atsumu:** Okay so like

**Atsumu:** He breaks up with you over an issue he doesn’t communicate

**Atsumu:** So you don’t know what happened

**Atsumu:** And you think you’re at fault

**Atsumu:** And you love him so much but you think he hates you

**Atsumu:** And you’re trying so hard to resent him because the break up came out of no where but you care about him too much 

**Atsumu:** That’s the scenario ☺️

**Kageyama:** That sounds a little familiar

**Atsumu:** (◕‿◕✿)

**Kita:** Tsumu

**Atsumu:** It’s okay Shin

**Atsumu:** I’m not sad

**Atsumu:** Well actually I’m crying

**Atsumu:** But it’s because I miss you so much

**Atsumu:** But I think this is a really good reflection of character! I think I’ll know you all so much better!

**Atsumu:** I’ll start. We all know it was Last Kiss and it was the sleeping part, but I would actually start crying when she talked about them dancing because Kita loves to dance

**Kita:** I miss that

**Kita:** Also mine is also last kiss but it was the part where she’s like ‘i’ll go sit on the floor wearing your clothes’

**Suna:** Aww is that because you actually did that? :-)

**Atsumu:** SHINSUKE??

**Kita:** Well this is embarrassing

**Atsumu:** SHIN I’M GOING TO CRY MORE

**Kita:** Maybe don’t

**Kita:** Just facetime me instead

**Atsumu:** Okay!!!

**Suna:** I don’t really listen to Taylor Swift

**Osamu:** Neither do I

**Suna:** Awesome

**Osamu:** Awesome

**Hinata:** Mine would be August and I would cry over the ‘you weren’t mine to lose’ part!!!!

**Kageyama:** I also don’t listen to Taylor Swift

**Kageyama:** And Shouyou I am yours to lose, soooo

**Hinata:** (✿╹◡╹)♡

**Oikawa:** One time my mom told me that mean by taylor swift was about me because I’m such an asshole

**Oikawa:** I was like 12 and existing but that’s fine

**Oikawa:** Me and Iwa-chan would never break up!!!

**Oikawa:** But also I have to think about this one so brb

**Yamaguchi:** ALL TOO WELL

**Yamaguchi:** And there isn’t one line it’s just the entire song

**Tsukishima:** That’s a little dramatic

**Yamaguchi:** WELL I WOULD BE FEELING DRAMATIC IF YOU RANDOMLY BROKE MY HEART TSUKKI

**Tsukishima:** Shut up Tadashi lol

**Tsukishima:** And I don’t really listen to Taylor Swift

**Tsukishima:** But Tadashi does

**Tsukishima:** But we’re also never breaking up so my taylor swift song to him is invisible string

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI 🥺

**Nishinoya:** I only know one Taylor Swift song!! And it’s love story!!

**Asahi:** Noya I think yours would be you’re not sorry

**Nishinoya:** Why?

**Asahi:** Idk I just have a feeling

**Nishinoya:** MY ASAHI IS SO CUTE

**Sugawara:** How is that cute? You’re such a freak

**Tanaka:** IT’S CUTE

**Sugawara:** Whatever

**Oikawa:** OKAY SO I’M BACK AND I’VE DECIDED

**Oikawa:** It would be the archer

**Oikawa:** And I would start out listening to it kind of NEUTRAL but then I would get more and more upset as the song progresses and then start crying at the ‘who would ever leave me darling but who would stay’ part

**Atsumu:** Oh I love how it’s a whole scenario

**Oikawa:** Thank you I thought very hard about it

**Iwaizumi:** Stupid

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan! What’s your song if we break up?

**Iwaizumi:** We aren’t breaking up, idiot

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan!!!

**Sugawara:** MINE WOULD BE I ALMOST DO

**Kuroo:** Mine would be last kiss

**Kuroo:** WHAT ABOUT YOU KENMA

**Kenma:** Illicit Affairs but I’m not elaborating because this is weird and embarrassing

**Akaashi:** mine would be breathe

**Atsumu:** Kenma, not you being rude for no reason..

**Atsumu:** WE’RE BONDING

**Atsumu:** This type of thing says a lot about a person!

**Kunimi:** I don’t listen to Taylor Swift, and I can’t imagine crying to one of her songs

**Kunimi:** But my go to song would be mariners apartment complex by lana del ray 

**Kindaichi:** Of course it would be

**Oikawa:** OF COURSE IT WOULD BE

\--

**Oikawa:** Guys ugh

**Oikawa:** I can’t stop listening to the twilight soundtrack today

**Kenma:** That soundtrack slaps 😈

**Kenma:** I’ve literally only seen the first movie but like

**Kenma:** I listen to it a lot

**Oikawa:** What

**Oikawa:** You what???

**Oikawa:** Wtf???

**Oikawa:** Shouyou tell me he’s lying

**Oikawa:** Tell me that Kenma, someone that I’ve known almost my whole life, has seen all of the Twilight movies…

**Hinata:** He’s not

**Hinata:** I haven’t seen any of the movies

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Oikawa:** KAGEYAMA TELL ME HE’S LYING

**Kageyama:** I wouldn’t know

**Kageyama:** I haven’t seen them either

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Sugawara:** ATSUMU

**Sugawara:** TELL ME HE’S LYING

**Atsumu:** Umm

**Atsumu:** This is awkward

**Atsumu:** I haven’t seen the last two

**Kita:** Wtf

**Atsumu:** Have you Shin?

**Kita:** Yes????

**Atsumu:** …

**Osamu:** Tsumu wtf

**Atsumu:** WHAT???

**Atsumu:** SAMU YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THEM EITHER

**Osamu:** Yes I have?

**Atsumu:** WHEN?

**Atsumu:** WE DIDN’T WATCH THEM TOGETHER

**Osamu:** I HAVE A LIFE OUTSIDE OF YOU???

**Atsumu:** No you don’t

**Atsumu:** Shin

**Kita:** What

**Atsumu:** Tell Osamu?? That I’m right??

**Kita:** What

**Kita:** Why am I involved in this

**Atsumu:** Awesome. You hate me

**Kita:** You’re dumb lol

**Atsumu:** Samu I’m the oldest so that means I’m right

**Osamu:** RIGHT ABOUT WHAT??

**Osamu:** I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT

**Osamu:** And I’m the oldest

**Atsumu:** Stop lying…

**Osamu:** YOU STOP LYING

**Kenma:** I’m so close to killing both of you

**Oikawa:** SAME BECAUSE WE WEREN’T EVEN TALKING ABOUT YOU TWO IDIOTS

**Oikawa:** STUPID MIYA TWINS

**Oikawa:** We need to all have a Twilight marathon!

**Atsumu:** But what if you guys watch all the movies and then spoil the last two in the chat…

**Oikawa:** What the fuck

**Oikawa:** When I say we all

**Oikawa:** I mean we all

**Oikawa:** As in we all in the chat

**Oikawa:** Did you think I was excluding you??

**Osamu:** You should be

**Oikawa:** We can all have a Twilight marathon except Tsumu

**Suna:** Kita is invited because he’s handsome

**Osamu:** Yeah!

**Kita:** Thanks

**Atsumu:** WHAT

**Atsumu:** STOP??

**Atsumu:** SAMU AND SUNA THAT’S MY BOYFRIEND

**Osamu:** That doesn’t mean he can’t be handsome to us??

**Osamu:** Don’t you think Suna is handsome?

**Osamu:** Or at least pretty or something?

**Atsumu:** I guess????

**Suna:** That’s a little rude

**Suna:** I hate you

**Suna:** Ugly ass Atsumu

**Atsumu:** WHAT

**Kenma:** STOP IT

**Kenma:** First of all, suna you’re very pretty

**Kenma:** Second of all, Kita is very handsome, Atsumu you’re just fucking weird

**Kita:** Yeah Atsumu

**Kita:** Are you trying to say I’m not handsome?

**Oikawa:** Oh god, Kita… I’m so sorry

**Sugawara:** Men are trash, Kita

**Hinata:** It’ll be okay Kita (•ө•)♡ you can do better anyways

**Atsumu:** WTF WTF WTF

**Atsumu:** SHIN???

**Kita:** I’m sorry, Atsumu, I only date men who have seen all of the Twilight movies

**Atsumu:** Shin you’re making me cry

**Kita:** Sorry I guess

**Atsumu:** SHIN

**Oikawa:** Okay 

**Oikawa:** We’re getting way off track here

**Oikawa:** Back to the original point

**Oikawa:** We need to watch Twilight

**Oikawa:** Who’s free this weekend?

**Sugawara:** Me!!

**Kageyama:** Not me

**Atsumu:** Not me

**Kuroo:** Not me

**Oikawa:** Well that’s okay!!

**Oikawa:** We don’t need you guys there anyways!!

**Iwaizumi:** Tooru

**Oikawa:** Fine fine whatever

**Oikawa:** Maybe next weekend?

**Hinata:** We can watch them at mine and Yamayama’s!!!!

**Kageyama:** Yeah, we just bought a really big couch lol

**Oikawa:** YESSS

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if this ending is weirdly abrupt I just didn't want to write everyone saying 'me' 😢🏃♀️  
> also thank you for reading!!! :-)


	141. Originally this was really REALLY SCARY Like Tsukki, Asahi, Kageyama. EVERYONE bUT UMMMMM NO PLS NOT RN I'm terrified the 12 year olds think I'm a weird old lady. But I'll make a scary one later, once this fear is gone.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kiyoko: Usually when people persistently flirt with me I like flirt back so I can leave but that’s only if they’re super persistent you know
> 
> Daichi: Be careful please, that sounds terrifying 
> 
> Akaashi: What an honorable sacrifice 

_!!!! _

**Oikawa:** Hello all

**Oikawa:** I just finished screaming

**Akaashi:** Oh my

**Iwaizumi:** Why were you screaming? I thought you were going to the store

**Oikawa:** I am at the store. I screamed all the way here

**Iwaizumi:** Are you okay?

**Oikawa:** Um yes

**Oikawa:** No

**Oikawa:** Maybe

**Iwaizumi:** What happened

**Akaashi:** ???

**Oikawa:** uGHH SO

**Oikawa:** I stopped to get Starbucks and like…

**Oikawa:** I wanted to pay with my rewards because they expire soon

**Oikawa:** So the guy told me that was fine and he scanned my phone

**Oikawa:** And then he goes “Okay after all of those stars, your total is 0 dollars. Are you paying with cash or card?”

**Oikawa:** And like, he was being a jokester so I played along

**Oikawa:** AND ALSO MY COFFEE WAS JUST SITTING ON THE COUNTER NEXT TO HIM

**Oikawa:** I said “oh no, I dont think I have enough to cover that.”

**Oikawa:** And he said “That’s fine. You can pay me in a smile.”

**Kiyoko:** Um gross

**Oikawa:** I KNOW

**Oikawa:** I THOUGHT HE WAS JOKING SO I LIKE LOOKED AT HIM THEN STARED AT MY COFFEE

**Oikawa:** My gorgeous iced coffee with two pumps of toffee nut

**Oikawa:** She was longing for me, wanting to be consumed by me

**Oikawa:** he was taking an awful long time so I looked up at him and he was like, leaning out the window

**Oikawa:** Staring at me expectantly. So I gave a little uncomfy laugh, flashed my pearly whites and he kinda just “☺️that was perfect” and handed me my coffee. I LITERALLY ROLLED UP MY WINDOW AND DROVE OUT OF THERE SCREAMING

**Kiyoko:** Ew why flirt through the drive thru

**Oikawa:** I FELT HELPLESS LIKE PLEASE JUST GIVE ME MY DRINK SO I CAN GO

**Iwaizumi:** Did you get his name?

**Oikawa:** No Iwa-chan, I was too busy staring at my coffee

**Kiyoko:** Usually when people persistently flirt with me I like flirt back so I can leave but that’s only if they’re super persistent you know

**Daichi:** Be careful please, that sounds terrifying 

**Akaashi:** What an honorable sacrifice 

**Tanaka:** 🤬🤬

**Kiyoko:** It’s fine because Ryuu is like a guard dog

**Tanaka:** 🥰🥰

**Daichi:** I don’t think that’s a good thing…

**Tanaka:** shhh daichi 🥰🥰

**Kiyoko:** lmaooo

**Oikawa:** EW FLIRT BACK??? I HAVE A BOYFRIEND

**Iwaizumi:** Don’t flirt back

**Akaashi:** Sometimes I do that too but most of the time I’m with Bokuto and he just💪🏻 so it’s not a problem

**Oikawa:** But Iwa-chan wasn’t with me

**Oikawa:** Ugh I wanted to die

**Oikawa:** Curse my cute face

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up

**Oikawa:** IWA-CHAN WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME TO SHUT UP

**Iwaizumi:** BECAUSE YOU LET HIM DO THAT

**Oikawa:** WHAT

**Iwaizumi:** WHY DID YOU SMILE AT HIM

**Oikawa:** I DIDN’T SEE IT AS FLIRTING, I THOUGHT IT WAS CUSTOMER SERVICE AND EMBARRASSING

**Iwaizumi:** You’re an idiot

**Oikawa:** Please Iwa-chan, comfort me (.﹒︠₋﹒︡.)

**Iwaizumi:** How did you not see that as flirting????

**Oikawa:** I DONT KNOW I JUST WANTED MY DRINK

**Iwaizumi:** If he made you uncomfortable why did you comply???

**Oikawa:** I didn’t want to be mean

**Oikawa:** And I was more embarrassed than uncomfortable

**Iwaizumi:** Whatever

**Iwaizumi:** Where are you now? 

**Oikawa:** omw to have lunch with my Iwa-chan of course! ★⌒ヽ( ͡° ε ͡°)

**Iwaizumi:** You didn’t even tell me

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan I’m omw to have lunch with you

**Iwaizumi:** Omg

**Iwaizumi:** I’ll see you when you get here baby

**Oikawa:** ( ˘ ³˘)♥

**Oikawa:** Iwa-chan is mad oops

**Daichi:** I think I would be too

**Oikawa:** WHY I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING

**Daichi:** No no, not at you

**Daichi:** At the situation

**Oikawa:** What

**Daichi:** It’s just annoying. And I mean, he’s seen tons of people that like you just approach you all the time

**Oikawa:** No he hasn’t?

**Daichi:** So your fanclub is nonexistent?

**Oikawa:** We don’t talk about them teehee

**Daichi:** I don’t mean it in a bad way. I’m just trying to let you know that he isn’t mad at you

**Oikawa:** Okayyy

**Oikawa:** Well, I’m gonna go cheer him up! Thank you Daichi

**Daichi:** You’re welcome

**Akaashi:** BEFORE YOU GO PLS I HAVE A QUESTION

**Akaashi:** Was the coffee even any good?

**Oikawa:** NO AND THAT MADE ME SCREAM EVEN MORE

**Akaashi:** AHHAHA

**-**

**Bokuto:** _ Attached Image _

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI AND KENMA LOOK SO CUTE TODAY

**Kenma:** AhhhHHH

**Kenma:** Thank you Bokuto

**Oikawa:** OMG THATS SO CRAZY

**Akaashi:** What?

**Kenma:** I’m offended

**Oikawa:** It’s just because like

**Oikawa:** I ain't never seen two pretty best friends, it’s always one of em gotta be ugly

**Kenma:** I forgot how hatred felt

**Akaashi:** hm me too

**Oikawa:** No guys laugh pls

**Osamu:** I’m laughing

**Oikawa:** Not you

**Atsumu:** I’m laughing

**Oikawa:** Not you either

**Kageyama:** Can I laugh, Oikawa?

**Oikawa:** Yes

**Kageyama:** Well I’m not going to

**Oikawa:** TOBIO

**Hinata:** HAHAHA

**Sugawara:** OMFG

**Kenma:** Wow the loml

**Hinata:** no please

**Tsukishima:** Lol

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI IS LAUGHING

**Tsukishima:** Shut up

**Yamaguchi:** NO

**Tsukishima:** …

**Tsukishima** left the group

**Sugawara:** What a brat

**Sugawara** added  **Tsukishima** to the group

**-**

**Sugawara:** I love my little puppy angel sweet princess Yuki

**Sugawara:** But omg I just want to cuddle Daichi and she won’t let me

**Daichi:** ??

**Sugawara:** Daichi you wouldn’t notice because you dont care about me

**Daichi:** That’s not true

**Sugawara:** Yuki always makes her way in between us when we sleep

**Sugawara:** SHE HAS 100000 BEDS BUT SHE WANTS TO SLEEP BETWEEN US

**Sugawara:** SO IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT I GET UP AND MOVE TO LAY BY YOUR BACK SO I CAN HUG YOU

**Sugawara:** AND I WAKE UP AND SHE’S BETWEEN US AGAIN

**Sugawara:** PLEASE LET ME CUDDLE MY BOYFRIEND

**Asahi:** She wants to sleep by both of you. That’s so cute

**Sugawara:** NO SHE’S TRYING TO TAKE DAICHI FROM ME

**Daichi:** I just get so excited because I love you both so much

**Daichi:** I never realized, I’m sorry Suga

**Daichi:** Also, she can’t take me from you

**Daichi:** She’s a dog

**Sugawara:** That’s not stopping her from trying!!!

**Daichi:** Omg

**Daichi:** We’ll figure something out

**Daichi:** Do you want her to sleep in the living room?

**Sugawara:** No!! What kind of stupid suggestion is that?!?!

**Daichi:** Just wondering lol

**Daichi:** I wouldn’t let her anyways

**Sugawara:** Good omg

**Tanaka:** If I had to choose between cuddling Daichi or Suga, I’d choose Daichi

**Sugawara:** I have two things to say to you. One, don’t touch daichi. Two, fucking good. I dont want to cuddle with you anyways

**Tanaka:** AHAHA

**Nishinoya:** Asahi Asahi

**Asahi:** Yes

**Nishinoya:** I miss you!

**Asahi:** I miss you too!!

**Kiyoko:** Oh yeah, you’re visiting your family this weekend. I forgot

**Asahi:** Yup! 🤗

**Nishinoya:** On a scale from 1-10

**Nishinoya:** How much do you guys think Asahi loves me

**Kiyoko:** 11

**Sugawara:** 11

**Daichi:** 11

**Tanaka:** 11

**Nishinoya:** How dare you underestimate my amazing asahi!!! THE CORRECT ANSWER IS 500

**Sugawara:** Aw lol

**Daichi:** I don’t like this game

**Sugawara:** LMAOOO

**Sugawara:** What brought this up?

**Nishinoya:** he was being so cute today

**Nishinoya:** like he kept sending me selfies and i just want to see him so bad

**Asahi:** Aw Noya, you can sleep over when I get back!

**Nishinoya:** YAY

**Kiyoko:** Why don’t you ever go to Noya’s?

**Nishinoya:** …

**Nishinoya:** My bed is too small

**Nishinoya:** Or so Asahi says

**Asahi:** It is

**Nishinoya:** Asahi, I sleep on top of you anyways!!!

**Asahi:** Still

**Nishinoya:** It’s okay because he has better sheets anyways!! 

**Asahi:** And Suzu!!!

**Nishinoya:** No

**Nishinoya:** She has yet to return MY pillow

**Asahi:** You just said you sleep on me anyways

**Nishinoya:** And?

**Asahi:** …

**Asahi:** I miss you Noya

**Nishinoya:** 🥺🥺

**Sugawara:** So we’re just gonna skip over my problems here?

**Nishinoya:** Shhh, twinks are meant to be silent when others are talking

**Sugawara:** WHAT

**Sugawara:** You, Nishinoya Yuu, are calling me, Sugawara Koushi, a twink?

**Nishinoya:** Um yes?

**Sugawara:** Well, takes one to know one

**Nishinoya:** EXCUSE ME

**Sugawara:** IF IM A TWINK, YOURE A TWINK

**Daichi:** omg

**Oikawa:** ooh this convo

**Sugawara:** Silence twink! We’re talking

**Oikawa:** WHAT I JUST GOT HERE BE NICE

**Asahi:** What is happening right now

**Nishinoya** changed the group name to  _ Twinks _ 🤬

**Oikawa:** Why are you angry about yourself?

**Tsukishima:** Yamaguchi, you fit in well here

**Yamaguchi:** TSUKKI WHAT

**Kageyama:** Hinata too

**Hinata:** ARE YOU AN IDIOT

**Kenma:** Kuro, if you say anything you’re dead

**Kuroo:** I won’t

**Kuroo:** your looks speak for themselves

**Kenma:** 🙃

**Lev:** YAKU LOOK, A CONVERSATION YOU CAN JOIN IN

**Yaku:** Please let me ignore this groupchat in peace

**Yaku:** Also, Lev

**Yaku:** Fuck off. You’re not coming over tonight

**Lev:** YAKU WHAT PLEASE

**Yaku:** I hate you

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmmm I wonder who inspired the ending


	142. so my brain has moved on from constantly having last kiss and dear john on loop to you are in love and clean so my brain is still taylor swift but at least it isn't fucking depressing lmao but anyways 😜you can hear it in the silence (silence) 😝 you can

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma: You guys are so cute
> 
> Atsumu: KENMA 🥵
> 
> Kenma: ATSUMU STOP MAKING ME REGRET IT EVERY TIME I’M NICE TO YOU

_ Twinks _ 🤬

**Hinata:** _ attached image _

**Hinata:** GUYS!

**Hinata:** Yamayama and I are finally all unpacked!!!

**Asahi:** It looks so nice!!

**Hinata:** Thank you!!

**Hinata:** Grumpyyama says thank you too

**Kageyama:** I’m not grumpy

**Kageyama:** And I could have said thank you myself

**Hinata:** Then say thank you

**Asahi:** He really doesn’t have to

**Kageyama:** Thank you Asahi

**Asahi:** Um

**Asahi:** You’re welcome I guess

**Oikawa:** Wait wtf

**Oikawa:** It looks nice!

**Oikawa:** But also what

**Oikawa:** I’m a little confused

**Sugawara:** Me too I think

**Sugawara:** How long ago did you two move in again?

**Kageyama:** I think a little over three months ago

**Sugawara:** And you’re just now unpacked?

**Oikawa:** Wtf

**Kageyama:** It’s Shou’s fault

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Kageyama:** Most of the stuff we didn’t unpack was yours

**Hinata:** Oh so you hate me

**Sugawara:** Omg

**Hinata:** So you want to break up with me

**Hinata:** In front of all of our friends?

**Sugawara:** Kageyama… Wtf

**Oikawa:** Tobio how could you (；゜○゜)

**Kenma:** Shouyou 🙃

**Kageyama:** Shou stop

**Kageyama:** I’m the one who said we couldn’t unpack the rest of it yet

**Hinata:** EXACTLY SO WHY WAS IT MY FAULT

**Kageyama:** It was a joke

**Hinata:** No it wasn’t because you don’t make jokes

**Hinata:** You aren’t funny

**Sugawara:** AHAHA HINATA

**Kuroo:** That sounds like something Kenma would say

**Atsumu:** Tobio… Hinata is being so mean to you 😳😖😜

**Atsumu:** Mistreatment AF‼️‼️🤬

**Kageyama:** He’s not mistreating me as much as you did tho😆💅🏼💔

**Atsumu:** Tobio😳😏... stop I’m blushing 😂🙄🤰

**Oikawa:** What the fuck

**Oikawa:** There’s a lot of things I don’t like about what just happened

**Oikawa:** But I’ll start with the most obvious: the emojis

**Hinata:** THEY’VE BEEN SENDING EACH OTHER EMOJIS LIKE THAT FOR A WEEK NOW

**Hinata:** I HATE IT

**Osamu:** ME TOO

**Osamu:** IT’S SO UGLY

**Atsumu: 😝** I’m sorry you guys don’t appreciate what Tobio and I have‼️🙄

**Atsumu:** Maybe get over it 😖😝😉

**Kageyama:** Yeah 🤣😂😆 Haterz af 😇😘😂

**Kita** has removed  **Kageyama** and  **Atsumu** from the chat

**Kita:** No

**Sugawara:** HAHAHA

**Sugawara:** Anyways, now that that’s over

**Sugawara:** Why didn’t he let you unpack your things Hinata?

**Hinata:** Oh! We wanted to wait to put things away in one of the rooms until we finished painting it and putting carpet down

**Iwaizumi:** That makes sense

**Iwaizumi:** So in other words you guys were just arguing for the sake of arguing

**Hinata:** Yup!!!

**Oikawa:** I hate that

**Sugawara:** Stop, it’s cute

**Oikawa:** Maybe to a freak like you

**Sugawara:** 😳

\--

**Atsumu:** GUYS 

**Atsumu:** GUESS

**Atsumu:** WHAT

**Osamu:** No

**Atsumu:** SOMEONE ELSE GUESS WHAT

**Suna:** No

**Atsumu:** SOMEONE ELSE GUESS WHAT

**Oikawa:** No

**Atsumu:** SOMEONE ELSE GUESS WHAT

**Kenma:** No

**Atsumu:** SOMEONE ELSE GUESS WHAT

**Kita:** He’s just going to keep going until y’all stop saying no

**Kageyama:** Ugh

**Kageyama:** What Atsumu?

**Atsumu:** I said guess!

**Kageyama:** No

**Sugawara:** No

**Kuroo:** No

**Daichi:** No

**Atsumu:** Haters FR‼️😂🙄💅🏼

**Kita:** Darling

**Atsumu:** FINE

**Atsumu:** I’M MOVING IN WITH THE LOVE OF MY LIFE IN A WEEK!!!

**Osamu:** Thank god

**Osamu:** You’ll finally be GONE

**Kita** changed the group name to  _ Haters FR‼️😂🙄💅🏼 _

**Atsumu:** SHIN HAHAHA

**Suna:** KITA

**Sugawara:** WAIT WHAT

**Sugawara:** THAT’S SO EXCITING WTF

**Sugawara:** I DIDN’T KNOW YOU GUYS WERE MOVING IN TOGETHER SO SOON??

**Kita:** Well we were going to wait another month or two because I’m still taking care of my dad, and my grandma was going to move in and stuff

**Kita:** But then she ended up bumping up her move in date when she realized why I wanted to move out

**Kita:** She gave me this whole lecture

**Atsumu:** I was on the phone to hear it

**Atsumu:** Grandma Kita is iconic AF PERIODT‼️😂👵🤣

**Oikawa:** Atsumu

**Oikawa:** For the sake of my sanity

**Oikawa:** Please stop

**Atsumu:** Haters FR‼️😂🙄💅🏼

**Kageyama:** Haters FR‼️😂🙄💅🏼

**Kageyama:** What happened though? Like are you okay Kita?

**Kita:** Oh yeah!!

**Kita:** She honestly gave me the same lecture that Atsumu did that one time

**Atsumu:** Before you broke my heart

**Kita:** Shut up

**Kita:** She was kind of just like

**Kita:** ‘you can’t put your life on pause for this, especially when you have so many people willing to help you’

**Atsumu:** And about how you need to accept help…

**Kita:** Shut up

**Atsumu:** And then she called me ‘that sweet boy’ 

**Kageyama:** I’m sure that’s only because she got you confused with someone else 

**Atsumu:** TOBIO

**Kita:** That’s true

**Atsumu:** SHINSUKE

**Kita:** I’m only joking, darling

**Atsumu:** σ(￣∇￣;)

**Sugawara:** wait that’s so exciting though!!

**Sugawara:** I’m so happy for you two!!

**Daichi:** Yeah!! Congrats you two! Living together is so fun!

**Sugawara:** Yes!!

**Sugawara:** Like

**Sugawara:** Waking up next to my Daichi every morning feels so special 🥺

**Oikawa:** And you get to make breakfast together 🥺

**Hinata:** And eat dinner together 🥺

**Kenma:** And he hogs the fucking bathroom when all you want to do is shower 🥺

**Sugawara:** HAHA KENMA

**Kuroo:** KENMA

**Kenma:** （・ｴ・@

**Atsumu:** Don’t listen to the haterz Kenma 😏🤣‼️

**Kenma:** I want to punch you

**Kuroo:** KENMA AHAHA

\--

**Atsumu:** IT’S MOVE-IN DAY!!

**Atsumu:** SHINSUKEEEE

**Atsumu:** I’M LEAVING TO COME GET YOU IN 10 MINUTES!!!

**Kita:** Awww

**Kita:** Drive safe darling

**Atsumu:** I WILL I WILL

**Sugawara:** I’M SO EXCITED FOR YOU GUYS

**Kageyama:** You better invite me and Shouyou over when you guys have settled‼️🙄

**Atsumu:** Obviously 🙄🤣😋

**Hinata:** STOP

-

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Atsumu:** HE’S HEREEEE

**Atsumu:** _ attached image _

**Kita:** Lol Atsumu

**Kita:** You’re being so embarrassing today

**Sugawara:** KITA WTF YOU LOOK SO CUTE

**Atsumu:** IKR IKR IKR

**Oikawa:** cute!!

**Oikawa:** Are you guys driving far?

**Atsumu:** Yeah! The apartment we found is near Samu’s

**Osamu:** Ew

**Atsumu:** YOU’RE THE ONE WHO SUGGESTED IT

**Suna:** Yeah if I remember correctly you told him you’d beat him up if he lived too far away from you

**Osamu:** I think I’m being framed

**Osamu:** My own boyfriend is against me 

**Suna:** Shut up

**Kenma:** You guys are freaks

**Kenma:** Drive safe though

**Atsumu:** Kenma 🥵

**Kenma:** Gross

**Kenma:** You’re making me want to take that back

**Kenma:** I won’t tho just for Kita

**Atsumu:** Okay!! We’re off now so I gtg 😎

**Oikawa:** Be safe Kita!

**Kageyama:** Yeah Kita be safe!!

**Suna:** Yeah Kita!!

**Kita:** Aww lol

**Kita:** He’s pouting now

**Osamu:** Just hold his hand and I’m sure he’ll feel better

**Kita:** Good idea

-

**Kita:** _ attached video _

**Kita:** We’re done unpacking for the day (๑>ᴗ<๑)

**Kageyama:** Oh wtf it looks so organized already

**Atsumu:** Yeah Shin is being a maniac

**Kita:** I just want it to be clean

**Atsumu:** I know sweetheart

**Kenma:** I’m cartwheeling down the street wtf

**Kenma:** You guys are so cute

**Atsumu:** KENMA 🥵

**Kenma:** ATSUMU STOP MAKING ME REGRET IT EVERY TIME I’M NICE TO YOU

**Kita:** Aww thank you Kenma!

**Kenma:** Kita 🥵

**Atsumu:** WHY ARE YOU ALLOWED TO DO IT BUT I CAN’T

**Kenma:** Because thinking about you makes me gag

**Atsumu:** KENMA YOU’RE SO MEAN

**Atsumu:** Haterz‼️🙄💅🏼

**Kenma:** YOU MAKE ME SICK

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the lack of updates, our brains are just empty😳


	143. I wrote this in like 20 minutes and it's not very good. Maybe I'll retire forever. I've been so ugly and clingy recently, makes me feel dumb anywho  YOU TOOK THE TIME TO MEMORIZE ME MY FEARS MY HOPES AND DREAMS I JUST LIKE HANGING OUT WITH YOU ALL THE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Atsumu: Yeah, that’s obvious. Because you were thinking of me
> 
> Sugawara: …
> 
> Sugawara: I’d rather think of Kuroo

_ Haters FR _ ‼️😂🙄💅🏼

**Oikawa:** Bed head is horrible

**Oikawa:** I hate waking up with messy hair

**Iwaizumi:** I think your hair is cute in the morning

**Oikawa:** Hm well I think you’re a liar

**Oikawa:** Thank you though Iwa-chan

**Oikawa:** But why does it just stick up on the sides wut

**Iwaizumi:** Because?? You were??? Sleeping on it????

**Oikawa:** Awesome 

**Oikawa:** I’m never laying down to sleep again

**Iwaizumi:** so dramatic all the time.

**Oikawa:** EW IWA-CHAN YOU JUST SEE ME LIKE THAT EVERY MORNING

**Iwaizumi:** Yes and it’s fine

**Oikawa:** I’VE DECIDED I WILL SLEEP AFTER YOU AND WAKE UP BEFORE YOU SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO SEE ME LIKE THAT

**Iwaizumi:** Shut up

**Sugawara:** It’s too early for this

**Iwaizumi:** It’s 6pm

**Sugawara:** yes, and me and Daichi are taking a nap so shhhhh

**Oikawa:** Why are you napping at 6

**Sugawara:** Shhhhh

**Oikawa:** No

**Oikawa:** I came here to tell a story but then I got distracted because Iwa-chan showed me an ugly pic he took of me

**Oikawa:** Anywho

**Oikawa:** So my gross former roommate stole my FUCKING GLADE PLUGIN

**Oikawa:** And I mean, it’s not that serious but like…

**Oikawa:** I BOUGHT IT LIKE WHAT. IF HE ASKED, I WOULD HAVE GIVEN IT TO HIM

**Sugawara:** UNFORGIVABLE

**Oikawa:** RIGHT??? AND MY LOVELY LOVELY IWA-CHAN

**Oikawa:** BLESS HIS BIG LOVING HEART

**Iwaizumi:** Hurry up with your dumb story

**Oikawa:** MEANIE

**Oikawa:** He bought me a glade plugin

**Oikawa:** And this very pleasant peppermint scent I found

**Oikawa:** We plugged it in for a bit

**Oikawa:** And once the smell made its way around the room I broke out on my face because I’m 🙃allergic🙃 to it apparently

**Oikawa:** So we unplugged it 😍

**Iwaizumi:** He thinks it’s a hate crime

**Oikawa:** I think the company is homophobic

**Sugawara:** I would too tbh

**Sugawara:** Kinda rude of them

**Oikawa:** EXACTLY

**Sugawara:** Are you gonna buy a new scent?

**Oikawa:** Yes!

**Iwaizumi:** Good

**Oikawa:** Well thank you for listening, Suga. Continue your nap

**Sugawara:** Me and Daichi have some extra oils laying around that you can try out. Just so you don't spend on something you’re allergic to again?

**Oikawa:** YOURE AN ANGEL

**Sugawara:** Just let us know when you want to come over!!

**Iwaizumi:** We will! Have a good night

**Sugawara:** you too☺️

-

**Sugawara:** GOOD MORNING ALL

**Sugawara:** I was in the shower and thought of the cutest thing ever

**Kenma:** What is it?

**Kuroo:** Were you thinking of me??

**Sugawara:** Definitely not

**Osamu:** He must’ve been thinking of me

**Sugawara:** Not you either

**Atsumu:** Yeah, that’s obvious. Because you were thinking of me

**Sugawara:** …

**Sugawara:** I’d rather think of Kuroo

**Atsumu:** WHAT

**Kuroo:** COOL

**Kuroo:** WAIT NO SUGA THATS MEAN

**Sugawara:** I was thinking about my future!

**Sugawara:** Like, I’ve always been super excited to make a little powerpoint for my future students!!

**Sugawara:** And I’m gonna have slides about my hobbies and interests

**Sugawara:** And my pets

**Sugawara:** And 

**Sugawara:** There’s gonna be a slide dedicated to my husband🥺

**Sugawara:** A slide dedicated to my Daichi🥺

**Daichi:** Aw Suga

**Tsukishima:** Gross

**Sugawara:** FUCK OFF AND THINK ABOUT IT

**Sugawara:** My stupid little cute students are just gonna know that Daichi is my husband

**Sugawara:** And like, they’ll just know Daichi🥺 

**Sugawara:** He can come visit and they’ll be excited to see him

**Daichi:** Aww, I can bring you lunch

**Daichi:** And if there’s a close holiday, I’ll bring the class cupcakes

**Sugawara:** Daichiiii🥺🥺

**Sugawara:** And the best part is

**Sugawara:** Hopefully we’ll have homophobic parents that complain so we can argue with the school board🥺

**Daichi:** What

**Daichi:** Suga, that’s scary… Why do you want that?!

**Sugawara:** They’ll think I’m spreading the homosexual agenda and complain🥺If they complain enough I might move schools

**Sugawara:** So much drama🥺

**Akaashi:** So much attention🥺

**Daichi:** NO guys, that's not a good thing. Suga, I don't want you to go through that

**Sugawara:** Daichi, what if we get our own little court case🥺🥺

**Kuroo:** You’re fucking insane

**Sugawara:** No no, we’ll change the world

**Tsukishima:** Shut up??

**Sugawara:** Don’t talk to me like that

**Sugawara:** But actually, Daichi just getting along with my future students

**Sugawara:** Maybe I’ll fling myself into traffic

**Asahi:** I’m terrified

**Sugawara:** No one asked

**Asahi:** Pls

**Sugawara:** No but actually, I thought of that in the shower and wanted to cryyyyy

**Sugawara:** Daichi I love you sooooo much

**Daichi:** I love you soooooo much more

**Sugawara:** 🥺😚

**Daichi:** 😚

**Tsukishima:** Ew

**Sugawara:** I’m tired of you

**Tsukishima:** Disown me please

**Sugawara:** No❤️

**Sugawara:** You’ll just forever live with the fact that Kageyama is my favorite son

**Tsukishima:** Sucks for you I guess

**Sugawara:** NO! KAGEYAMA IS THE BEST

**Tsukishima:** Cool

**Sugawara:** WHATEVER I HATE IT HERE

-

**Akaashi:** Maybe I’ll transfer schools

**Bokuto:** WHAT

**Akaashi:** And I’ll find a new boyfriend

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI PLEASE

**Kageyama:** What’s happening?

**Akaashi:** I walked into the club room 

**Akaashi:** The place was decorated, very nicely, in Christmas shit

**Hinata:** Is that bad?

**Hinata:** I just talked Yamayama into getting a tree this weekend

**Akaashi:** To me it is

**Akaashi:** I don’t like to rush to holidays. I like to celebrate every month on it’s own and if we do this we skip fall

**Bokuto:** BUT AKAASHI YOU KNOW I LOVE CHRISTMAS

**Akaashi:** I know, that’s why we celebrate it ALL december

**Akaashi:** I can’t believe you would do this to me

**Bokuto:** NO AKAASHI I WAS SO EXCITED TO START GIVING YOU GIFTS

**Akaashi:** No

**Akaashi:** Return them

**Bokuto:** I REFUSE

**Akaashi:** Why are you buying me gifts so early? Maybe I should sell them then give you the money back

**Bokuto:** NO IT’S BECAUSE I LOVE YOU

**Akaashi:** That’s so much money

**Bokuto:** BUT IT’S FOR AKAASHI

**Kageyama:** Aw, you guys exchange gifts all month

**Akaashi:** Just small stuff and one big gift on Christmas

**Kageyama:** That’s really sweet!

**Bokuto:** YES BUT I WANTED TO START EARLY

**Akaashi:** Well, thank you then Bokuto. I’m not really prepared though. I haven’t gotten any gifts yet

**Bokuto:** IT’S OKAY I DONT NEED ANY I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY WHEN YOU OPEN THEM

**Akaashi:** That’s really sweet

**Akaashi:** You buy me too many things

**Bokuto:** BECAUSE I WANT TOO

**Akaashi:** I feel like I never give you an equal amount though

**Bokuto:** JUST REPAY ME WITH LOVE

**Akaashi:** Omg

**Akaashi:** Well, I’ll start buying your gifts too.

**Bokuto:** AKAASHI YAY I LOVE CHRISTMAS

**Bokuto:** I LOVE AKAASHI

**Akaashi:** So embarrassing

**Akaashi:** I love you too

**Hinata:** Hm

**Hinata:** Maybe I’ll buy Kageyama gifts too

**Kageyama:** No, idiot

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Kageyama:** No, idiot 🧡


	144. I miss you so much Savanah omfg literally we're not gonna see each other for so long. Im gonna have grey hairs by then. Im gonna be like a million years old by then omgomg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa: @ the Miya twinks
> 
> Kuroo: WHAT AHAHA
> 
> Oikawa: TWINS OMFG I MEANT TWINS

**Tsukishima** changed the group name to  _ Kill me. _

**Hinata:** 😟

**Kageyama:** You’re rude Kei

**Tsukishima:** Your boyfriend sucks

**Hinata:** I miss Kageyama 😔

**Tsukishima:** I don’t know how to tell you this but, you suck

**Hinata:** Yamayama I miss you!!

**Kageyama:** I miss you too

**Tsukishima:** Do you miss me Yamaguchi?

**Yamaguchi:** Idk I kinda like spending time with Kageyama

**Kageyama:** Really?

**Tsukishima:** What

**Hinata:** WHAT

**Sugawara:** What is happening?

**Tsukishima:** Hinata had the bright idea to swap boyfriends for a few days

**Sugawara:** That sounds fun!

**Hinata:** I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA BE WITH YAMAGUCHI BUT I GOT PARTNERED WITH TSUKKI

**Hinata:** HES SCARY

**Yamaguchi:** I’m having fun!

**Yamaguchi:** Kageyama likes going on dates!

**Hinata:** WHY ARE YOU GOING ON DATES WITH HIM

**Sugawara:** Because you swapped boyfriends?? Wtf

**Yamaguchi:** Yeah what

**Tsukishima:** Where’d you guys go?

**Yamaguchi:** The arcade! He won me a plushy

**Hinata:** TOBIO I WANTED TO GO TO THE ARCADE

**Kageyama:** We went after your friday classes

**Hinata:** THATS UNFAIR

**Kageyama:** You’re the one that wanted to do this

**Hinata:** STILL

**Kageyama:** Well, take that up with Kei

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki sucks at claw machine games

**Hinata:** CAN YOU NOT DO ANYTHING TSUKISHIMA

**Tsukishima:** Can you shut up?

**Kageyama:** Stop being mean to him

**Kageyama:** Shouyou

**Kageyama:** I won something for you at the arcade too. For when this is done

**Hinata:** 🥺🥺

**Hinata:** Thank you 🥺

**Kageyama:** You’re welcome

**Yamaguchi:** It was really cute!

**Yamaguchi:** He spent like twenty minutes looking at all the machines for something you’d really like

**Kageyama:** GOODBYE

**Hinata:** That's so cute 🥺

**Kageyama:** GOODBYE

**Sugawara:** Aw Kageyama

**Tsukishima:** What a loser

**Hinata:** SHUT UP

**Sugawara:** SHUT UP

**Yamaguchi:** Tsukki shut up

**-**

**Oikawa:** @ the Miya twinks

**Kuroo:** WHAT AHAHA

**Oikawa:** TWINS OMFG I MEANT TWINS

**Daichi:** How often do you write the word twink that it autocorrected?

**Oikawa:** Shut your mouth Daichi

**Daichi:** That’s a little mean

**Oikawa:** Shut your handsome mouth please Daichi

**Atsumu:** Yes Oikawa?

**Osamu:** You rang Oikawa?

**Oikawa:** Yes

**Oikawa:** You two seem like you were the “where's my hug at?” kind of guys

**Osamu:** Well I’m offended

**Atsumu:** Me too wtf?!?!!

**Oikawa:** Oh

**Oikawa:** Were you not?

**Atsumu:** NO WE WEREN’T

**Oikawa:** My bad

**Oikawa:** Carry on with your day then

**Suna:** They would wear too much cologne

**Suna:** Like just a little too much, nothing crazy

**Suna:** But it smelled really nice when they wore the right amount

**Osamu:** Remember when it spilled in my backpack? 😔

**Kita:** Yes, how could I forget. My nose was on fire every time I stepped near you

**Osamu:** 😔😔

**Suna:** I’m very glad you learned from your mistakes and stopped putting cologne on after practice

**Osamu:** Thank you

**Kita:** I’m glad you and Tsumu learned to wear a normal amount of cologne

**Osamu:** Thanks 😇

**Osamu:** but still, fuck you Oikawa for thinking that of me AND my baby bro

**Atsumu:** You tell him big bro!

**Osamu:** We would NEVER EVER DO THAT

**Atsumu:** EXACTLY

**Osamu:** Thanks for the support baby bro

**Atsumu:** of course big bro

**Suna:** Goodbye, this is embarrassing

**Osamu:** You’re leaving?

**Osamu:** Where's my hug at?

**Oikawa:** I should’ve never asked

**-**

**Hinata:** I have been reunited with Kageyama

**Hinata:** _ Attached Image _

**Hinata:** He got me Sylveon

**Kenma:** How gay of you

**Kenma:** Kuro, I want a Sylveon

**Kuroo:** Okay kitten

**Daichi:** Did you guys have fun?

**Kageyama:** I did

**Hinata:** 🙃no

**Yamaguchi:** Yes!

**Tsukishima:** Fuck no

**Yamaguchi:** I bet it wasn’t that bad! 

**Tsukishima:** It was horrible

**Daichi:** At least the Yamas had fun

**Kageyama:** Yeah, I never really get to hang out with just Yamaguchi so it was kinda nice

**Yamaguchi:** Aw, I had fun too Kageyama!

**Hinata:** NOT ALLOWED

**Hinata:** NO FALLING IN LOVE WITH KAGEYAMA

**Kenma:** Too late bitch

**Kuroo:** Too late loser

**Kenma:** oop

**Kuroo:** Anyways….

**-**

**Akaashi** removed  **Bokuto** from the chat

**Kuroo:** ??

**Kuroo:** What’s happening

**Akaashi:** Kenma please come over

**Akaashi:** Fuck rhis wasnt supposwd to be in the groip

**Kenma:** Are you alright? I’m omw

**Sugawara:** Are you okay Akaashi?

**Akaashi:** Yes? 

**Akaashi:** no?

**Akaashi:** I just got fucking dumped and I cant stop crying

**Akaashi:** Bokuto is such a stupid idiot and he overthinks everything because he only cares about the people around him

**Akaashi:** UGH BUT WHAT IF HE JUST DIDNT KNOW HOW TO BREAK UP WITH ME AND THIS WAS THE EASIEST WAY WITHOUT TELLING ME HE HATES ME OR SOMETHING

**Kenma:** Akaashi, Im almost there

**Kenma:** Calm down, I’ll be there soon

**Oikawa:** Oh no 

**Oikawa:** I’m sorry Akaashi

**Kuroo:** There’s no way!!!

**Kuroo:** Are you sure Akaashi? He would never break up with you!

**Akaashi:** Yeah, I’m sure I misunderstood someone saying “Akaashi, it’s easier if we just break up.”

**Kuroo:** Shit okay

**Kuroo:** I’m really sorry Akaashi

**Kuroo:** Kenma, I’ll drop you guys some dinner okay? Just stay with him

**Kenma:** Okay, thanks Kuro

**Sugawara:** Akaashi omg

**Sugawara:** I’m really sorry, I wish there was something I could do

**Akaashi:** It’s fine it’s fine

**Akaashi:** I just can't stop crying it’s fine

**Sugawara:** I’m just a phone call away, don’t hesitate Akaashi

**-**

**Bokuto** added  **Daichi, Oikawa, Kuroo, Kita, Ushijima** _ 🥵crunch-a-tize me captain🥵 _

**Bokuto:** How is everyone’s night going?

**Bokuto:** We have a big chat but I thought one with just the captains would be cool!

**Daichi:** Bokuto, are you okay?

**Bokuto:** Yeah, why?

**Daichi:** What

**Kuroo:** BRO WHAT

**Kuroo:** Akaashi said you guys broke up

**Bokuto:** Yeah! I broke up with him!

**Oikawa:** …

**Oikawa:** I’m confused

**Bokuto:** Me too

**Kuroo:** YOU BROKE UP WITH AKAASHI KOU

**Bokuto:** Yes

**Daichi:** What the fuck is happening

  
  
  
  
  
  



	145. it's snowing outside and my caramel macchiato is kind of gross but it's whatever because at least we're on FaceTime and get to talk to each other 😼🥺

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> :-)

Hi everyone!

I'm sorry I don't have a real update for you all. But I just wanted to say a few things.

Firstly, thank you for reading this far into our story. Originally the other author and I began writing this series just to send to each other, which is why it might seem overly silly at times, or too specific. We kind of based it on ourselves and things that happened to us, but then we thought about posting it and started making it a bit more silly and tried to make the story's timeline a little more consistent. The both of us haven't really been to interested in Haikyuu anymore, though, and coming up with ideas and plot for the chapters really began to feel like a chore, so we've decided to put the story on hold. If the urge ever strikes us, we may update it, but for now, I don't see any updates coming any time soon. 

I'm going to be marking it as complete just so people aren't waiting for an update that may never come. 

Thank you again for reading our story! We read every single comment and appreciated all of the love that we got! :-)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!!


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